After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men; he found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women; she loved to browse.
One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her local Wal-Mart :
Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.
1 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.
3. September 14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.
4. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.
5. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
6. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
7. November 10: While carelessly handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
8. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the " Mission Impossible" theme.
9. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"
And last, but not least ..
10. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!"
Regards,
Wal-Mart
Patti Barber, Office Supervisor IAccounting Unit, Behavioral Health Services
