Author Topic: JOKES AND Riddles!!  (Read 370165 times)

Offline Kim

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4500 on: May 16, 2010, 06:41:31 pm »


Q: What invention made it possible for humans to walk through walls?

A: The door
After all is said and done, more is said than done.

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Offline a*hopefull

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4501 on: May 16, 2010, 06:46:23 pm »
Hey!

Mind if I make a joke? (Im going to type one anyways! ;D)

A British minister on a visit to Morscow who, in order to please his host, mugged up a short speech in Russian. On his way to the banquet he realised he did not kow the Russian for 'ladies and gentlemen.' He stopped his car near a public toilet and took down the equivalent. His speech did not get the kind of response he expected. Afterwards he asked one of his colleagues what had gone wrong.

The colleague replied, ''Your speech was excellent, but why did you have to start with 'Male and Female urinals' ?''

 :D
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Offline Kim

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4502 on: May 16, 2010, 06:56:46 pm »


Q: What goes peck, peck, peck, boom?

A: A chicken in a minefield.
After all is said and done, more is said than done.

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Offline Baladya

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4503 on: May 16, 2010, 07:09:28 pm »

Q: What invention made it possible for humans to walk through walls?

A: The door


REALLYYY !!!!!  :o :o :o :o HAHAHAHAHA  ;D ;D ;D
Looks like i ran out of cool signatures :|

Offline The Golden Girl =D

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4504 on: May 16, 2010, 07:46:41 pm »
mara sa3eedi died.....5 angles came to him.....two to ask him the questions and three to convince him he died :P

cool  8)
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Offline WARRIOR

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4505 on: May 16, 2010, 07:56:51 pm »
TEACHER-STUDENT JOKES  :P


TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
STUDENT : "HIJKLMNO! "!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
STUDENT : Yesterday you said it's H to O !



looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool :P
NO secrets to SUCCESS , it is the result of 1.HARD WORK 2.GOOD PREPARATION 3.LEARNING FROM FAILURE
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Offline The Golden Girl =D

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4506 on: May 16, 2010, 07:59:56 pm »
Hey!

Mind if I make a joke? (Im going to type one anyways! ;D)

A British minister on a visit to Morscow who, in order to please his host, mugged up a short speech in Russian. On his way to the banquet he realised he did not kow the Russian for 'ladies and gentlemen.' He stopped his car near a public toilet and took down the equivalent. His speech did not get the kind of response he expected. Afterwards he asked one of his colleagues what had gone wrong.

The colleague replied, ''Your speech was excellent, but why did you have to start with 'Male and Female urinals' ?''

 :D

i like it  8)
Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest(13:28)

Please, Don't forget to Include GG in your Prayers =D

Offline The Golden Girl =D

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4507 on: May 16, 2010, 08:00:28 pm »

Q: What invention made it possible for humans to walk through walls?

A: The door


7elwa di ..loool  :D
Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest(13:28)

Please, Don't forget to Include GG in your Prayers =D

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4508 on: May 16, 2010, 08:07:33 pm »
                                      The 10 greatest sarcastic dares!!!!

Sarcastically speaking, I dare you to do some of the things found on my top ten list.

10. Pull into a gas station and use the window washer to wash your entire car.

Joe Humor9. Ask a bank teller to break a $100 bill for you. Then when asked how you want it done say, "in hundreds".

8. Call a political candidate's campaign office and ask them for a donation to your non-candidacAy.

7. Ask a security guard how it feels knowing that in all the action movies the security guards are always the first to die.

6. When you get credit card offers in the mail, stuff the prepaid envelopes with toilet paper and mail them back. (whether you use new or used toilet paper is totally up to you.)

5. Call your bank and ask them to add your checking account onto the $700 billion government bail out plan.

4. Find someone who is big into worrying about the threat of global warming, remind them of their own carbon dioxide and body heat contribution to the planet, and ask them to stop it.

3. Ask a judge if you can get away with murder as long as you can convince a jury of your peers ahead of time that it is justified.

2. Send a bill to every TV station, radio station, cell phone company, and satellite company, charging them an "access fee" for the waves they broadcast through your property. If they refuse payment, charge them with trespassing.

And the #1 Sarcastic Dare...

1. Circulate a petition to put "intelligent human beings" on the endangered species list.
If you don't like my driving, then stay off the sidewalk

Offline DrEvil

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4509 on: May 16, 2010, 08:09:28 pm »
                                      The 10 greatest sarcastic dares!!!!

Sarcastically speaking, I dare you to do some of the things found on my top ten list.

10. Pull into a gas station and use the window washer to wash your entire car.

Joe Humor9. Ask a bank teller to break a $100 bill for you. Then when asked how you want it done say, "in hundreds".

8. Call a political candidate's campaign office and ask them for a donation to your non-candidacAy.

7. Ask a security guard how it feels knowing that in all the action movies the security guards are always the first to die.

6. When you get credit card offers in the mail, stuff the prepaid envelopes with toilet paper and mail them back. (whether you use new or used toilet paper is totally up to you.)

5. Call your bank and ask them to add your checking account onto the $700 billion government bail out plan.

4. Find someone who is big into worrying about the threat of global warming, remind them of their own carbon dioxide and body heat contribution to the planet, and ask them to stop it.

3. Ask a judge if you can get away with murder as long as you can convince a jury of your peers ahead of time that it is justified.

2. Send a bill to every TV station, radio station, cell phone company, and satellite company, charging them an "access fee" for the waves they broadcast through your property. If they refuse payment, charge them with trespassing.

And the #1 Sarcastic Dare...

1. Circulate a petition to put "intelligent human beings" on the endangered species list.


good ones...!!! :D


“When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.”

Offline ksitna

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4510 on: May 16, 2010, 08:15:22 pm »
LOVED THE DARES

would be great if i did them in thhe summer :)
mwahahahaha ahem
take whatever you want and give nothing back :)

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4511 on: May 16, 2010, 08:17:58 pm »
thanks DrEvil and ksitna ;D
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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4512 on: May 16, 2010, 08:19:49 pm »
LOL  :P

Nice ones for a change  ::) :P

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4513 on: May 16, 2010, 08:22:36 pm »
LOL  :P

Nice ones for a change  ::) :P

all cause of u  >:(
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Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: JOKES AND Riddles!!
« Reply #4514 on: May 16, 2010, 08:23:50 pm »
                           WHAT NOT TO DO WHEN FORGETTING YOUR ANNIVERSARY!!!! :P

John was in trouble, really big trouble. You see, he forgot his wedding anniversary and, if you're married, you can imagine what he's probably going through. His wife was really pissed.

She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!" She was serious too, so John got serious.

The next morning he woke up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped, right there in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife threw her robe on and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house and opened in with much anticipation.

Inside she found a brand new bathroom scale. John has been missing since Thursday.
If you don't like my driving, then stay off the sidewalk