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WELL I THOUGHT IF U HAVE ANY FUNNY JOKES U MIGHT SHARE THEM HERE!!LOL!! :D
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What is defference between man and Superman?
Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser.
HAHAHAHA!!
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What is defference between man and Superman?
Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser.
HAHAHAHA!!
looool funny!! Liked it ;)
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What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.
It seems ill be the only one posting the JOKES!! LOL!!
POST ANY IF U HAVE!!
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
His lips are moving. ;D
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
His lips are moving. ;D
hehehe i keep telling my friend to be a lawyer cuz she's good at lying!! Never caught her
Nice one though
Keep going! ;)
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
His lips are moving. ;D
hehehe i keep telling my friend to be a lawyer cuz she's good at lying!! Never caught her
Nice one though
Keep going! ;)
haha, thx!! hey post any riddles if u want!! :)
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
His lips are moving. ;D
hehehe i keep telling my friend to be a lawyer cuz she's good at lying!! Never caught her
Nice one though
Keep going! ;)
haha, thx!! hey post any riddles if u want!! :)
Can't think of any riddle now lol if anything comes to my mind i'll surely post it :D
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OK THIS ONE IS A RIDDLE (I GOT FROM A WEBSITE LOL!!)
WHY DID THE TEACHER WEAR SUNGLASSES TO SCHOOL??
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I'm bad! Really bad. Nobody is badder than me.
I'm sick! Sicko! So sick the sickos in sickoland are sick of the sight of me.
And thick too! I 's so stupid I have the stuiddest stupid laugh in the land of the stupid people (england)
I'm mad. Madder than a mad cow. Madder than the maddest mad hatter, madder than a million mad rats locked up masddening each other to mad insanity.
I'm a liar. No it's tru, I am lying. Hope you believe me.
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HAHA!! I BELIEVED U!!
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OK THIS ONE IS A RIDDLE (I GOT FROM A WEBSITE LOL!!)
WHY DID THE TEACHER WEAR SUNGLASSES TO SCHOOL??
ANSWER this ONE PEOPLE!! DONT GOO TO BED!! :'(
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OK THIS ONE IS A RIDDLE (I GOT FROM A WEBSITE LOL!!)
WHY DID THE TEACHER WEAR SUNGLASSES TO SCHOOL??
OK ILL ANSWER IT!!
SHE HAD BRIGHT STUDENTS!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!! I AM SOOO MUCH LAUGHING WITHOUT U PEOPLE I DONT CARE!! :'( :'(
IT IS STILL NOT BED TIME!! :'(
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He didnt want to blinded by the illuminating wisdom of his students
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A car slows down at a stop sign and keeps driving. A cop sees him and pulls him over.
The cop asks, "Why didn't you stop?"
The man says, "I slowed down."
The cop pulls out his nightstick and starts beating him. "Now," the cop says, "do you want me to stop or slow down?"
hahahahaha.....
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Q: Why does a traffic light turn red?
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.....
A: If you had to change in front of everyone, you'd turn red, too.
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A senior citizen was driving down the freeway when his wife called his cell phone.
"Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!"
"It's not just one car," said Herman, "It's hundreds of them!"
im a senior citizen :D lol
haha
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HAHA, THAT WAS FUNNY!! POST MORE!!
HADRABEK POST MORE!! >:(
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Brad stared through the dirty soot-smeared window on the 22nd floor of the office tower. Overcome with depression he slid the window open and jumped through it. It was a sheer drop outside the building to the ground. Miraculously after he landed he was completely unhurt. Since there was nothing to cushion his fall or slow his descent, how could he have survived the fall?
here is a gd funnt riddle :D lol
solve it.....hadrabek if u didnt! :P
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kan fi martaba beta3et el sareer!!
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He didnt want to blinded by the illuminating wisdom of his students
YES!! ASTAR GOT IT RIGHT!!(after i posted the answer) BUT STILL A BIG PRIZE FOR U!!
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kan fi martaba beta3et el sareer!!
hahaha.....dah ely rabena adarek 3alah :P :D lol
the solution is::: *drums*
Brad was so sick and tired of window washing, he opened the window and jumped inside.
hahahahahha
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HAHA!! ok ok!! i suck at this!!
anyway bye ba2 ya walad!! lazem anammmm!!
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Yo' Mama' jokes :D lol
Yo mama's so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.
Yo Mama is so fat, that when she dances, the band skips!
Yo' mama's lips so big, she can whisper in her own ear.
Your mama's so ugly, she laid down to take a beauty nap and slipped into a coma.
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Yo' Mama' jokes :D lol
Yo mama's so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.
Yo Mama is so fat, that when she dances, the band skips!
Yo' mama's lips so big, she can whisper in her own ear.
Your mama's so ugly, she laid down to take a beauty nap and slipped into a coma.
ghelsa awiii!!lol!!
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Yo mama is so fat, her picture fell off the wall!
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Yo mama is so fat, her picture fell off the wall!
haha!! ok post more mosh has sleep!! BAS LA2 i cant ba3den papa yashofni ma3ek lawa7dina !! hehe!! bye ba2!! this is a joke u should laugh!!!
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sorry i couldnt help but post this one :(
mra namoosa wa23eet fe kobayt 5mraaa. 5argeet t2ool aw3a al nesrrrr
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sorry i couldnt help but post this one :(
mra namoosa wa23eet fe kobayt 5mraaa. 5argeet t2ool aw3a al nesrrrr
HAHAHAHAHAHA!! this is soooooooo funny!! Post more!!
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- mara wa7ed kalb fakad el zakera . am mesh fel share3, saw saw..la2 adsi... naw naw ...la2 ..
- 2etnen s3yda byl3abo shatrang el malek mat men el shalal
- wa7ed se3edi b2ol le mrato nokta
radet 3aleh : hah re5ma
rad 3aleh : hah tale2
- mara wa7ed se3edi bydhen el 7et
so7abo alolo :tab 7ot gornal ta7tak
rad 3alehom: la2 mesh mosh kela and gedeh tayel.
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hahahahaha!! those r soooooo funny!! especially el sa3ida ones!! ok look at this
mara wa7ed sa3edi 3araf eno el galed moda fa ra7 mashi 3arian!!
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Why is the math book so unhappy??
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Because it is full of problems!!
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Hahaha okay... I will read the rest of the thread later on, because I have to go now, busy day today, take care.
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Hahaha okay... I will read the rest of the thread later on, because I have to go now, busy day today, take care.
BYE!! :)
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social and racial discrimination >:( >:( >:(
u either name this thred "Arabic jokes" or post em in english...
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social and racial discrimination >:( >:( >:(
u either name this thred "Arabic jokes" or post em in english...
LOL!! OK WOTEVERR!! i posted ones in english..and when we posted in arabic becuz no one was there!! but then if u got any english post them here..... :) NO DISCRIMINATION DUDE!! :)
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A smart blond, Santa clause and a pregnant woman were in an elevator. They say a penny on the floor. Who picks it up?
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The pregnant lady. Because the other two aren't real xD
Don't get it in a bad way...it's just a joke ;D
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The funniest blonde jokes :P
-I knew a blonde that was so stupid that.......
*she called me to get my phone number.
*she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate."
*she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.
*she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.
*she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
*she tried to drown a fish.
*she thought a quarterback was a refund.
*she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.
*she tripped over a cordless phone.
*she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
*she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.
*she studied for a blood test.
*she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.
*when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
*when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.
*when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home
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Only three doors
An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.
The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"
The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"
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haha funny guys!! POST MORE!!
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Quick Blonde Jokes
Q. How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
A. Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
Q. How do you confuse a blonde?
A. You can't, they have always been like that.
Q. A blonde is going to London on a plane. How can you steal her window seat?
A. Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row.
Q. What do twenty blondes standing ear to ear make?
A. A wind tunnel.
Q. How do you confuse a blonde?
A. Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.
Q. How does a blonde try to kill a fish?
A. She drowns it.
Q. How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
A. Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.
Q. What did the blonde’s left leg say to her right leg?
A. Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.
Q. How does a blonde part their hair?
A. By doing the splits.
Q. What did the blondes right leg say to the left leg?
A. Nothing, they haven't met!
Q. Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A. Because that's where your supposed to wash vegetables.
Q. What's a blondes favorite nursery rhyme?
A. Humpme Dumpme.
Q. Why did the blonde like the car with a sunroof?
A. More leg-room!
Q. Why don't blondes use vibrators?
A. They chip their teeth.
Q. How does a blonde like her eggs in the morning?
A. Fertilized.
Q. Why do blondes like tilt steering?
A. More headroom.
Q. Why is a blonde like a doorknob?
A. Because everyone gets a turn.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
A. You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
Q. What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
A. The more you bang it, the looser it gets!
Q. What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?
A. Frosted Flakes.
Q. What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel?
A. An airbag.
Q. How can you tell a blonde has had a bad day?
A. She has a tampon tucked under her ear and she can't find her pencil.
Q. What does the Bermuda Triangle and a blonde have in common?
A. They both swallowed a lot of semen.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and an ironing board?
A. Its difficult to open the legs on an ironing board.
Q. How did the blonde burn her nose?
A. Bobbing for chips.
Q. What do you call a zit on a blondes A**?
A. Brain tumor.
Q. Why does a blonde insist on him wearing a condom?
A. So she can have a doggie bag for later.
Q. How would a blonde punctuate the following: "Fun fun fun worry worry worry"
A. Fun period fun period fun no period worry worry worry....
Q. What does a blonde say after multiple orgasms?
A. "Way to go team!"
Q. What do you call a blonde with a runny nose?
A. FULL.
Q. What happened to the blonde tap dancer?
A. She slipped off and fell down the drain.
Q. Why did the deaf blonde sit on the newspaper?
A. So she could lip read.
Q. Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
A. You get to park in the handicap zone.
Q. What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A. Pregnant.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a 747?>
A. Not everyone has been in a 747.
Q. What's the difference between butter and a blonde?
A. Butter is difficult to spread.
Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A. Pull the pin and throw it back.
Q. What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?
A. Artificial intelligence.
Q. What do you call a blonde standing on her head?
A. A brunette with bad breath.
Q. What do blondes and cow poop have in common?
A. The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Q. How does a blond turn on the light after sex?
A. She opens the car door.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A. When you smack the mosquito it stops sucking!!
Q. What does a blonde say when you ask her what the last two words of the national anthem are?
A. Play ball!
Q. What do smart blondes and UFO's have in common?
A. You always hear about them but never see them.
Q. Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice?
A. Cause it said concentrate.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and the Titanic?
A. They know how many went down on the Titanic.
Q. How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer?
A. The joystick is wet.
Q. Why do blondes wear underwear?
A. To keep their ankles warm.
Q. What is a brunette between two blondes?
A. An interpreter.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a brick?
A. The brick doesn't follow you home after you lay it.
Q. Did you hear about the blonde that needed gas money?
A. She sold her car for it..
Q. What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
A. "Are you sure it's mine?"
Q. Why do blondes have bruised belly buttons?
A. Because they have blond boyfriends.
Q. What do blondes and beer bottles have in common?
A. Their both empty from the neck up.
Q. What do you call a blonde with pig tails?
A. A blow job with handlebars.
Q. What do you call a blond with a brain?
A. A golden retriever.
Q. What do you call a blonde in the closet?
A. The 1984 hide and go seek champion.
Q. How can you tell that a blonde sent you a fax?
A. It has a stamp on it.
Q. What do you call a room full of blondes with PMS and yeast infections?
A. A wine and cheese party!
Q. How do you drown a blonde?
A. Put a scratch 'n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.
Q. Hear about the blonde that bought an AM radio?
A. It took her a month to figure out she could play it at night too.
Q. What did the blonde say when she saw the banana peel on the floor?
A. Oh no, I'm going to fall again!
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haha that will take some time :P
i also know alot of dirty jokes but cant post them here theyre reallly good lol ;D
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The Taxi Driver
A priest and a taxi driver both died and went to heaven. St. Peter was at the Pearly gates waiting for them.
'Come with me', said St. Peter to the taxi driver.
The taxi driver did as he was told and followed St. Peter to a mansion. It had anything you could imagine from a bowling alley to an Olympic size pool.
'Wow, thank you', said the taxi driver.
Next, St. Peter led the priest to a rugged old shack with a bunk bed and a little old television set.
'Wait, I think you are a little mixed up', said the priest. 'Shouldn't I be the one who gets the mansion? After all I was a priest, went to church every day, and preached God's word.'
'Yes, that's true. But during your sermons people slept. When the taxi driver drove, everyone prayed!
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BEST JOKE EVER XDDDDDDDDD
Two children were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying very loudly.
2nd Child: Why are you crying?
1st Child: I came here for a blood test.
2nd Child: So? Are you afraid?
1st Child: No. For the blood test, they cut my finger.
At this, the second one started crying profusely.
The first one was astonished.
1st Child: Why are you crying now?
2nd Child: I came for a urine test !
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HAHA!! u know if u post any dirty jokes ull be banned!! u hate blondes dont u?!?!
and i liked b4 the last one!! and the last one!! oh my god!! hahaha!!
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Q:How do you kill a Jew?
A:Throw a penny from a bridge.
:P we are lame. Shouldn't we be studying?
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Nope i just find them funny :P
ill go study in a few mins :D
and yea i know ill be banned, thats why we arent in page 10 by now ;)
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haha!! ya u can go study!! :P :P
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3adi law kan dirty bas 3arabi!? :P
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3adi law kan dirty bas 3arabi!? :P
haha!! la3 MOSH 3ADI!! fi mods hena arabs ya zaki!!
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hahahhahahahaa! my dirty jokes are nice =P but i need to say it face to face with the person xD
bas that's unfair =( we need to laugh..our minds are messed up by the IG's and the dirty jokes are funnier than normal jokes :P
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ASTGHAFARO ALLAH!! :P :P :P
ok here a riddle!!
who spends the most time in the bathroom??
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hahahaha i couldnt agree more :P
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ASTGHAFARO ALLAH!! :P :P :P
ok here a riddle!!
who spends the most time in the bathroom??
ME :P I'm always in the bathroom!
I dunno, the sink?!
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lol!!no!!
the answer is the PLUMBER! ;D
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lol!!no!!
the answer is the PLUMBER! ;D
ya3ni your saying that they even sleep in the bathroom!? :P
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la2 they work there!! :P
ok another one:
What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses??!!
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Due to a mixup on Grammy night, Madonna, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera are forced to share a private jet in order to arrive in time for the ceremony.
Once up in the air, Madonna pulls out a $1000 bill and says, "I'm going to throw this $1000 bill out the window and make someone down below very happy."
Not to be outdone, Britney ripped a $1000 bill in half and threw it out the window, saying, "Look, I just made two people really happy."
Not even noticing Britney's stupid move, Christina bragged, "Look, I'm going to throw 1000 $1 bills and make a lot more people a little happier."
At this point the pilot, who has overheard all this bragging and can't stand it anymore, comes out and says, "I think I'll throw all three of you out of this plane and make 250 million people happy."
hahahaha...:D
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la2 they work there!! :P
ok another one:
What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses??!!
A coconut on vacation ? :D :P
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UKKHH RIGHT!! i think u already know it!! :P :P
haha nice one for the celebs thing!!haha!!
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haha nice sanity
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shu 2ism il ka2en ilie yakol il ghyoom ow lownha wardee?!
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shu 2ism il ka2en ilie yakol il ghyoom ow lownha wardee?!
ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Rabit?!!lol!! they only thing which is pink....
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shu 2ism il ka2en ilie yakol il ghyoom ow lownha wardee?!
would u plz post english jokes only.......cuz some ppl dont know arabic over here
Thanks
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ya ya sanity is right!! but wait Zero tell us the answer!!
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=P ok haha...2akel ghyoom il wardee! :P
It's so lame I know.. :-\
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Guys how do I earn stars!? and when will I change from newbie to something else?
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A lecturer teaching medicine was giving a classoom observation. He took out a jar of yellow liquid. "This," he explained, "is urine. To be a doctor, you have to be observant of color, smell, sight, and taste."
After saying so, he dipped his finger into the jar and put it into his mouth. His class watched in amazement, most in disgust. But being
the good students that they were, the jar was passed, and one by one, they dipped their finger into the jar and put it into their mouths.
After the last student was done, the lecturer shook his head. "If any of you had been observant, you would have noticed that I put my second finger into the jar and my third finger into my mouth."
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Two old people, a man and a woman, walk into a hospital. The doctor says to the old man, "I'll need a urine sample, a feces sample, and a blood sample." The old man says, "What?" So the doctor says it again. Once again the old man says, "what?" So the doctor yells it, "I NEED A URINE SAMPLE, A FECES SAMPLE, AND A BLOOD SAMPLE!" With that the old woman turns to the old man and says, "He needs a pair of your underwear!"
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It got crowded in heaven, so, for one day it was decided only to accept people who had really had a bad day on the day they died. St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates and said to the first man, "Tell me about the day you died."
The man said, "Oh, it was awful. I was sure my wife was having an affair, so I came home early to catch her with him. I searched all over the apartment but couldn't find him anywhere. So I went out onto the balcony, we live on the 25th floor, and found this man hanging over the edge by his fingertips. I went inside, got a hammer, and started hitting his hands. He fell, but landed in some bushes. So, I got the refrigerator and pushed it over the balcony and it crushed him. The strain of the act gave me a heart attack, and I died."
St. Peter couldn't deny that this was a pretty bad day, and since it was a crime of passion, he let the man in.
He then asked the next man in line about the day he died. "Well, sir, it was awful," said the second man. "I was doing aerobics on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment when I twisted my ankle and slipped over the edge. I managed to grab the balcony of the apartment below, but some maniac came out and started pounding on my fingers with a hammer. Luckily I landed in some bushes. But, then the guy dropped a refrigerator on me!"
St. Peter chuckled, let him into heaven and decided he could really start to enjoy this job.
"Tell me about the day you died?", he said to the third man in line.
"OK, picture this, I'm naked, hiding inside a refrigerator...."
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oh GOD!!!
plz.......post other typa jokes
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HAHAHAHA!! THOSE R REALLY FUNNY!!
and ya zero..u have to post more posts to get the stars....
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oh GOD!!!
plz.......post other typa jokes
like what ? :P
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what did the banana say when the elephant stepped on it??
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Nothing, because it can't speak!?:P
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Nothing, because it can't speak!?:P
haha!! U GOT IT RIGHT!!
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Nothing, because it can't speak!?:P
haha!! U GOT IT RIGHT!!
u kiddin??.....
oh yea i forgot.......the topic is about kidding :P :D lol
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Nothing, because it can't speak!?:P
haha!! U GOT IT RIGHT!!
YAY ME!! :D
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Nothing, because it can't speak!?:P
haha!! U GOT IT RIGHT!!
u kiddin??.....
oh yea i forgot.......the topic is about kidding :P :D lol
hahaha :P
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Nothing, because it can't speak!?:P
haha!! U GOT IT RIGHT!!
u kiddin??.....
oh yea i forgot.......the topic is about kidding :P :D lol
seriously sanity master :-\
lol haha any1 know anymore yo mamma jokes ??
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Yo mamma's so fat, when you run around her twice...you get lost :D
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A brunette is trying to get across a river and suddenly she spots a blonde on the other side. She yells over to the blonde "Hey, excuse me! How do I get over to the other side?" And after a quick survey of the river, the blonde calls back "You ARE on the other side!"
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yo mama is so stupid i saw her yelling in an envelope i said wat are you doing she said sending voice mail.
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Yo mama's so poor she can't afford to pay attention.
hahaha
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Yo mama's face is so ugly, when she cries the tears run down her back.
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Yo Mama is so stupid, she got run over by a parked car.
want more??
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Yo mama's so ugly, she walked out of the pet store and the alarm went off.
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lollllll, hahaha
especially liked the blonde 1 :D
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hahahahaahaha I liked them
I +rep you :) ;)
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me too, + rep 4 u nd zerozero82 :D
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Yo mama's so fat she jumped out of the window and got stuck in the air
lets +rep everyone :P
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yo mama's house is so small, when she orders a large pizza she has to eat out side :P
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yo mama's so stupid, when ur father said it's chilli outside, she ran out with a plate :P
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yo mama's so fat, ur in her right now :P
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yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the cinema, she sits next to everyone :P
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yo mama's so fat, people jog around her for exercise :P
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hahhaa.....glad u liked them guys..and Thanks for who +repped me :D
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yo mama's so old, she breast feeds powdered milk :P
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Yo mama's so funky she brushes her teeth with a chainsaw.
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yo mama's so stupid, she came into this thread and didnt even smile :P
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Yo mama's so fat, when she walks down the street her legs talk to each other: ''You let me go, I'll let you pass, you let me go, I'll let you pass...''
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Yo mama's so stupid she thinks a balanced meal is a Big Mac in each hand.
^^^^^^^^^
i love this one. hahahahhahaha
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The one about the fridge was so funny. Are the websites slow
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Yo mama is so fat, she has a tattoo of the United States on her chest and in the corner it says ''actual size.''
hahahahahahahha
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@ astar: ya. they're kinda slow
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Yo mama so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture!
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kk.....enough jokes for today??
last joke:
Yo mama is so bald that when she takes a shower she gets brainwashed!
LOL.......hahahahaha
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HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA from which site you guys get the jokes?! :D
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k, last joke:
Yo mama so dirty she has to creep up on bathwater :P
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haha funny!! and yes enough jokes about yo mama!!
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A businessman walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. He says he is going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan. So the businessman hands over the keys to a Rolls-Royce parked on the street in front of the bank. Everything checks out, and the bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. An employee drives the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the businessman returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest , which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, We are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is; why would you bother to borrow $5,000?
The businessman replied: Where else in New York can I park my car for two weeks for 15 bucks?
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A lady and her young son were travelling in a taxi in New York. As it passed a particularly seedy part of the city the boy was fascinated by the garishly made-up women who were walking along the streets accosting some of the male passers-by. He asked his mum what they were doing and she replied in an embarassed voice that they were probably asking for directions. The taxi driver heard this and said "Why dontcha tell the boy the truth -- in udda words they're prostitutes." The lady blushed and the boy asked her "What are pros.... what the driver said? Are they like other women? Do they have children?" "Of course" said the mother "Where do you think New York taxi drivers come from?"
-
Yo mama's so stupid when she read this thread she thought we're complementing her :P
ok no more.. ;D
-
Two prisoners, sentenced to die in the electric chair on the same day were led down to the room in which they would meet their maker.
The priest had given the last rites, the formal speech had been given by the warden, and a final prayer had been said among the participants. The warden, turning to the first man, solemnly asked, "Son, do you have a last request ?"
To which the man replied, "Yes sir, I do. I love dance music. Could you please play The Macarena for me one last time?"
"Certainly," replied the warden.
He turned to the other man and asked, "Well, what about you, son ? What is your final request?"
"Please," said the condemned man, "KILL ME FIRST."
-
An old cowboy dressed to kill with cowboy shirt, hat, jeans, spurs and chaps went to a bar and ordered a drink. As he sat there sipping his whiskey, a young lady sat down next to him.
After she ordered her drink she turned to the cowboy and asked him, "Are you a real cowboy?"
"Well, I have spent my whole life on the ranch herding cows, breaking horses, mending fences... I guess I am," replied the cowboy.
After a short while he asked her what she was.
"I've never been on a ranch so I'm not a cowboy, but I am a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning I think of women, when I eat, shower, watch TV, everything seems to make me think of women," told the young woman.
A short while later she left and the cowboy ordered another drink.
A couple sat down next to him and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"
"I always thought I was, but I just found out that I'm a lesbian."
(is it over rated ??)
-
haha funny!!
ok solve this riddle!!
When is an apple not an apple?? ;D
-
A duck walks into a bar and asks, "Got any grapes?"
The bartender, confused, tells the duck no. The duck thanks him and leaves.
The next day, the duck returns and asks, "Got any grapes?"
Again, the bartender tells him, "No -- the bar does not serve grapes, has never served grapes and, furthermore, will never serve grapes." The duck thanks him and leaves.
The next day, the duck returns, but before he can say anything, the bartender yells, "Listen, duck! This is a bar! We do not serve grapes! If you ask for grapes again, I will nail your stupid duck beak to the bar!"
The duck is silent for a moment, and then asks, "Got any nails?"
Confused, the bartender says no.
"Good!" says the duck. "Got any grapes?"
-
haha funny!!
ok solve this riddle!!
When is an apple not an apple?? ;D
when it's in my stomach ?
-
A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"
"What dear?" She asked gently.
"I think you bring me bad luck."
-
haha funny!!
ok solve this riddle!!
When is an apple not an apple?? ;D
when it's in my stomach ?
haha!! NO!!
the answer is when it is a pineapple!! :P
-
lol
i hate pineapples !!
-
@zerozero82
haha...lolzz...
but wat an idiotic husband!!!!!
-
about the pineapples :D
3 explorers were looking in the forest when they were captured by Indians. They were taken to their chief, and he said go out into the forest and come back with 10 of the same kind of fruits. The first guy comes back with 10 bannanas, and the chief says, shove them all up your butt without making a sound.
So the 1st guy gets 2 bannanas in when he starts screaming, so the indians kill him. The second guy comes back with 10 berries, and they shove 9 in and are about to shove the 10th in when he starts laughing, and so since he made a sound the indians killed him too.
Now the first two explorers souls fly out of their bodies and into heaven and they start talking. The first explorer says 'Hey dude why did you laugh you could've gone back and told out families what had happened'.
The 2nd explorer replies, 'Sorry I just couldn't stop when I saw fred comin down the hill with 10 pinneapples.
if it is overrated tell me to remove it.........i hope its not, cuz it is hilarious
-
lol,
thats a classic :P
-
oh my god sanity!! this one is sooooo funny!!hahaha!!
-
lol,
thats a classic :P
some of the gd jokes that had been posted are classics but we just laughed :P :D lol
anywayzz.....i g2g now to seek the path of a better future (by studying :'( )
i guess that was a joke :D lol
bye every1.....and i hope u stay happy for a long time :D lol
-
guys, check out my number of posts
gr8 number 1111 :P
-
oh my god sanity!! this one is sooooo funny!!hahaha!!
:D....glad u liked it :D
i love it actually.....keep laughing insanely every time i remember it ;D
bye every1.....and i hope i made u laugh from ur hearts, and i hope u all liked wt i posted :) ;D
-
The guy replies, "Well I've got these two horses and I can't tell them apart. I don't know if I'm mixing up riding times or even feeding them the right foods."
The bartender suggests, "Why don't you try shaving the tail of one of the horses?"
The guy says, "That sounds like a good idea, I think I'll try it."
A few months later, he returns to the bar in worse condition. "I shaved the tail of one of the horses, but it grew back and I can't tell them apart again!"
The bartender says, "Why don't you try shaving the mane?"
A few months later the guy is back. "I shaved the mane of one of the horses, but it grew back!"
The bartender yells, "Just measure the damn horses. Perhaps one is slightly taller that the other one!" The guy storms out of the bar.
The next day, the guy runs into the bar. "It worked, it worked!" he exclaims. "I measured the horses, and the black one is two inches taller than the white one!"
-
oh zero!! u got 2 stars congrats!!
and ya thx sanity and gooooo study!!lol!! ill go after a while inshalla!!
-
:O COOOOOOOOOOOOOOLL!!!!!
-
ahahahaha zero dont think they understood it :P
and sanity loool ur joke was breath taking hahahah XDDDDDD
-
Q. Why do only 10% of women go to heaven?
:)
;)
:D
;D
A. Because if they all went, it would be hell. XD
-
Your mom's so fat she can't even jump to a conclusion.
Your mom's so fat, her clothes have stretch marks.
Your mom's so fat, she needs a watch on both arms because she covers two time zones.
Your mom's so fat, you could slap her butt and ride the waves.
Your mom's so fat, she has to buy two airplane tickets.
Your mom's so fat when she took her dress to the cleaners they told her, "Sorry, we don't do curtains."
Your mom's so fat, she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller
-
One day old man Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the Illinois State Fair. There is this man selling plane rides in his single prop show plane for $10 per person. Stumpy looks to Martha and says, "Martha, I think I really should try that." Martha replies, "I know you want to Stumpy, but we have a lot of bills, and you know the money is tight, and $10 is $10." So Stumpy goes without. Over the next few years they return every year, and the same thing, Stumpy wants to ride, but Martha says no money.
Finally, when Stumpy and Martha are both about 70 years old, Stumpy looks to Martha, and says, "Martha, I'm 70 now, and I don't know if I'll ever get the chance again, so I just have to be naughty and have a ride in that there airplane." Martha replies in the same old fashion, and Stumpy kind of slumps down. The pilot is standing near by and overhears the conversation...
The pilot pipes up, "Excuse me folks, I couldn't help but hear your situation, and I have a deal for you. I'll take both of you up together, and if you can both make the entire trip without saying a word, or even making the slightest sound, I'll give the ride for free. But if either of you make a sound, its $10 each." Well, Martha and Stumpy look at each other, and agree to take the ride.
The pilot takes them up, and starts to do loop de loops, twists, dives, climbs and spins. No sound. The pilot lands the plane, looks back at Stumpy and says, "Sir, I have to hand it to ya, you didn't make even the slightest sound and that was my best stuff." Stumpy looks back at the pilot and says, "Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, but $10 is $10!"
-
I have made a donation. Should be fast soon.
-
I have made a donation. Should be fast soon.
thats good to know, thanks astar ur the best :D
-
For decades, two heroic statues, one male and one female, faced each other in a city park, until one day an angel came down from heaven.
"You've been such exemplary statues," he announced to them, "That I'm going to give you a special gift. I'm going to bring you both to life for thirty minutes, in which you can do anything you want." And with a clap of his hands, the angel brought the statues to life.
The two approached each other a bit shyly, but soon dashed for the bushes, from which shortly emerged a good deal of giggling, laughter, and shaking of branches. Fifteen minutes later of naughty fun, the two statues emerged from the bushes, wide grins on their faces.
"You still have fifteen more minutes," said the angel, winking at them.
Grinning even more widely the female statue turned to the male statue and said, "Great! Only this time you hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on it's head."
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wow its faster already :D
An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father [never having seen an elevator] responded "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."
While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction.
The walls opened up again and a beautiful 24-year-old woman stepped out. The father said to his son, "Boy, Go get your mother."
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I have made a donation. Should be fast soon.
ur da man !! ;D
i promise u sir, that when i become a sucessful plastic surgeon i will donate one month's sallary to this wonderful site
thanks a lot :)
-
I have made a donation. Should be fast soon.
[/quote
A VERY BIG THANKS TO U!! :)
-
Q. Why do only 10% of women go to heaven?
:)
;)
:D
;D
A. Because if they all went, it would be hell. XD
HAHAHAHAHAHA!! THIS IS SOOO FUNNY!!
BUT UR WRONG >:( >:( >:(
-
wow its faster already :D
An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father [never having seen an elevator] responded "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."
While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction.
The walls opened up again and a beautiful 24-year-old woman stepped out. The father said to his son, "Boy, Go get your mother."
loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
yes, thats funny man ;D
-
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”
The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “Okay, now what?”
-
lol!! hey u wont watch da match??
-
tv is beside me, but i think the remote is broken lol
-
hahaha!! me too the tv is beside me!lol!!
-
ok got the remote working now need to find a channel :D
-
ffs no channel works :@@@@@@@@
and barce scores a goal ?!?!
changing tv !
-
hey guyz.. okay, now Im seriously back.. but only for a while... at least its betta than cuming on, posting 1 post and going off agen
anywayz ... looks like everyones craking up..:P
lOL...soo.. hows every1 been... wow.. I fell ike Ive missed alot
and yes Mony, Ive missed u loaaaaadz too matie ...:D
-
its on art3...
-
hey guyz.. okay, now Im seriously back.. but only for a while... at least its betta than cuming on, posting 1 post and going off agen
anywayz ... looks like everyones craking up..:P
lOL...soo.. hows every1 been... wow.. I fell ike Ive missed alot
and yes Mony, Ive missed u loaaaaadz too matie ...:D
HEY ROXY!! lol the match is on!!
-
I knowwwww I SOOOO WANNA WOTCH it ... but.. I can't ..!!
Imstudying Literature ONLINE number 1.
and number 2. I havnt even got channel...:P
aND NUMBER 3. iM NOt a guy so I cant go to the neares cafe and wotch it...
damn.... anywayz .... wots the score...?
BARCELONA
[/b][/color]
-
And guyz.... 1 more thing ...
why hasyrepp gone down from 11 to 9 ??
wot did I do ....? :(
-
https://studentforums.biz/index.php/topic,842.975.html
this is da link Q80boy is there posting whats happeneing!! and lol my Rep also decreases!! :) +REP for u!!
-
<3
-
hey sweetsh!! so ur Man U!!
lol!! I AM BARCELONA!! :P (becuz my boy friend is :P :P)
lol!! Just kidden!!
-
Okay, me too my boyfriend is a braca! But I never quit! Haha just kidding, no matter, a best friend of mine, is with barca, he cant chnge his opinion!
-
haha yaa!! I am wid Barca from da beginning!!
so BARCA ROCKS!!!!!!!!! :P
-
looolll Mony and sweetsh
IM BARCELONA TOOOOO ......
hehe... technically Im Arsenal.. but as soon as their not playing...
IM SUPPORTIN BARC....!!!
-
Go to hell both of you!! 8)
:P
-
Go to hell both of you!! 8)
:P
Someone will need a BIG SLAP after the match!! BECUZ BARCA WILL WIN!! :P :P :P
hahahahaha,ok it should be evil* MUWHAHAHAHA
-
Haha, missed the first goal :/
and By the way roxy ur studying lit from a website ?? cuz i kinda need to study lit too lol
and lets make a bet? if barca wins the sweetsh has to tell us her name ok ? :D
-
HAHA!! ya right!! :P
-
Loser because they already know my name.
-
boo wheres the fun and excitement in that :P
-
ok lets make a real bet!! a painful one!! muhahahaha!! :P
-
Now that sounds fun :D
what do u have in mind woman?
-
Muhahaha I can delete this thread if Im that evil =P
GROUP HUG <3
-
if barca wins ... let me think ;D
-
OH MY GOD SWEETSH!!HAHAHA!! u know that would kill me!! :'(
no no sumthin else!! or ok..u can delete one of our threads and that would be abdo's thread!! ;D
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OH MY GOD SWEETSH!!HAHAHA!! u know that would kill me!! :'(
no no sumthin else!! or ok..u can delete one of our threads and that would be abdo's thread!! ;D
=O
There is more info there than the whole IGCSE section ::)
-
ok Q80boy is in our team u can delete one of his threads
and then if BARCA WINS Q80boy deletes one of ur thread!! ;D
-
erm "his" = me
whos "ur" ? :P
-
second have begun, quick go to General Talk
-
erm "his" = me
whos "ur" ? :P
his= Q80boy
ur=Sweetsh
:P :P :P
ok Q80 GOING TO GENERAL TALK!!
-
haha =P
-
Am I alone over here?! Where are Manchester's supporters =O
And no no deleting for threads because this will harm the forum and other members.
-
guyz barc. WILL winnn ...!!!
theres no IF about it ..:P
And Abd, go to www.sparknotes.com and u can find alll the books u need along with their character sketches,smmaries, plots, themes... and alll that stuff...its rllllly helppful
-
Thanx Roxy =D
and now i have to change tv again because every channel on my tv, is either messed up. ya3ni seriously, one of the biggest games of the year, and every sport channel i have inc. jazeera has either tennis or stupid friendly football game wtf -.-
-
It's on ART Sport 4.
But see the updates every minute on http://www.manutd.com/default.sps?pagegid={1981432E-2416-4FCB-A1B3-9D779A923E8D}
and listen it live on http://mu.tv.manutd.com/
-
Guys were are winning!!! lool
Manchester 1-0!!!!
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
-
Are you kidding or what?
-
Are you kidding or what?
About what??
-
It's 1-0 for BARCA! =(
-
It's 1-0 for BARCA! =(
I know lool im just kidding
y3ney we have to make our selves happy ;D
-
Inshallah they r going to change the score!!
-
HAHA, DONT DENY THE FACT IGgirl BUT UR LOSING!!! :P :P :P
-
And I'm going to cry =[
-
ahahahah, when the guy from man. shot and it went out, forgot his name :P, said FUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..... :p:p:p:p
-
And I'm going to cry =[
muahaha :D
-
Ronaldo is getting mad hahahahaha
hope they fight it will make my day :D:D:D
-
By the way peeps watch the thing on art 4 the guy talking is more exciting :P
-
yup it is!!
the game is exciting!! :D
-
HAHA, DONT DENY THE FACT IGgirl BUT UR LOSING!!! :P :P :P
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( No comment im depressed
-
HAHA, DONT DENY THE FACT IGgirl BUT UR LOSING!!! :P :P :P
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( No comment im depressed
HAHA!! no no its ok!! 90 sec left people!!
-
CONGRATULATIONS BARCELONA !!! ;D ;D ;D
HARD LUCK MAN. UTD. :D
-
YAAAAAAAY!! BARCA WON!!
-
>:( >:( >:( :( :( :( :'( :'(
-
>:( >:( >:( :( :( :( :'( :'(
Don't cry....smile instead!! ;D
Manchester played such a great game but they didn't have any luck!!!
-
van der sar wasn't doing his best..anways yesterday is gone tommorow is a new day :P and howcome this thread turned into MANCHESTER VS BARCELONA? I thought its about jokes!! :P
-
van der sar wasn't doing his best..anways yesterday is gone tommorow is a new day :P and howcome this thread turned into MANCHESTER VS BARCELONA? I thought its about jokes!! :P
we usually turn everything upside down!! ;D
-
hahaha cool
-
Hey people!! I am done wid my French EXAM!! WOHOOOO!! so ya, Man U supporters tough luck for yesterday, i am glad that barcelona won!! and after all it is just a game!! :) AND YES, they Man U played good and maybe next year they would win!! :)
Nowwww, let us continue wid da Jokes thread becuz ya it totally turned upside down!!lol!!
ill get some jokes and riddles and post em here!!
-
hey people try solving this riddle!! ;D
A farmer was going to town with a fox, a goose and a sack of corn. When he came to a stream, he had to cross in a tiny boat, and could only take across one thing at a time. However, if he left the fox alone with the goose, the fox would eat the goose, and if he left the goose alone with the corn, the goose would eat the corn. How does he get them all safely over the stream?
-
first the fox then the corn then the goose ;)
-
WELL I THOUGHT IF U HAVE ANY FUNNY JOKES U MIGHT SHARE THEM HERE!!LOL!! :D
one day, two atoms were walking together and one atom said to the other:
'hey I lost an electron!!'
the other electron said 'are you sure?'
the first alectron said 'yeah, i'm positive!!'
-
lol .. k i hav 1
wut is the thing that flies and meaws? :D
-
a flying cat?
catwoman?
a cat on an aeroplane?
-
first the fox then the corn then the goose ;)
haha, ok nice try but no!! becuz like this the goose will eat the corn b4 the farmer returns... :)
-
WELL I THOUGHT IF U HAVE ANY FUNNY JOKES U MIGHT SHARE THEM HERE!!LOL!! :D
one day, two atoms were walking together and one atom said to the other:
'hey I lost an electron!!'
the other electron said 'are you sure?'
the first alectron said 'yeah, i'm positive!!'
haha, this one is funny!!
-
a flying cat?
catwoman?
a cat on an aeroplane?
haha!! YA RIGHT!! :P :P :P
-
lol .. k i hav 1
wut is the thing that flies and meaws? :D
let me guess....is it a crazy bird?? ;D
-
u drunk fly.. ;D
-
A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply.
The first man then asks: "Where are you from?"
"I'm from Ireland," replies the second man.
The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland."
"Of course," replies the second man.
I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?"
"Dublin," comes the reply.
"I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin."
"Of course," replies the second man.
Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?"
"Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62."
"This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!"
About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender.
"Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."
-
Bill Gates died and found himself in purgatory being sized up by St. Peter. "Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows 95. I'm going to do something I've never done before in your case: I'm going to let you decide where you want to go."
Bill replied, "What's the difference between the two?"
St. Peter said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision."
"Fine, but where should I go first?"
"I'll leave that up to you."
"Okay then," said Bill. "Let's try Hell first."
So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful and clean. Bill saw a sandy beach with clear waters and lots of bikini-clad women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining, the temperature perfect. He was very pleased.
"This is great!" he told St. Peter. "If this is Hell, I really want to see Heaven!"
"Fine," said St. Peter, and off they went.
Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was very nice, but not as enticing as Hell.
Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision. "Hmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told St. Peter.
"Fine," retorted St. Peter, "as you desire." So Bill Gates went to Hell.
Two weeks later, St. Peter decided to check on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he found Bill shackled to a wall in a dark cave, screaming amongst hot flames, being burned and tortured by demons.
"How's everything going?" he asked Bill.
With his voice filled with anguish and disappointment, Bill responded, "This is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I can't believe this is happening! What happened to that other place, with the beautiful beaches and the scantily clad women playing in the water?"
"That was a demo," replied St. Peter.
-
oh i know!
ITS A KICKED UP HIGH CAT!
-
u drunk fly.. ;D
so then i am almost right!!
-
funny jokes Q80boy!! ;D
SO people try solvin my riddle!!
-
funny jokes Q80boy!! ;D
SO people try solvin my riddle!!
what riddle? bring it on!
-
THIS ONE!! ;D
A farmer was going to town with a fox, a goose and a sack of corn. When he came to a stream, he had to cross in a tiny boat, and could only take across one thing at a time. However, if he left the fox alone with the goose, the fox would eat the goose, and if he left the goose alone with the corn, the goose would eat the corn. How does he get them all safely over the stream?
-
they all climb a tree and cross ? :D
-
they all climb a tree and cross ? :D
HAHAHAHA!! NO!! haha, what a smart answer!!haha!!
-
THIS ONE!! ;D
A farmer was going to town with a fox, a goose and a sack of corn. When he came to a stream, he had to cross in a tiny boat, and could only take across one thing at a time. However, if he left the fox alone with the goose, the fox would eat the goose, and if he left the goose alone with the corn, the goose would eat the corn. How does he get them all safely over the stream?
he would first take the goose abroad then he comes back
then takes the sack of corn then when he reaches the other side he takes the goose back with him
then he puts the chicken back and takes the fox
then he comes back to get the chicken
ha im smart ;D
lol i wish i was
-
THIS ONE!! ;D
A farmer was going to town with a fox, a goose and a sack of corn. When he came to a stream, he had to cross in a tiny boat, and could only take across one thing at a time. However, if he left the fox alone with the goose, the fox would eat the goose, and if he left the goose alone with the corn, the goose would eat the corn. How does he get them all safely over the stream?
He takes the goose first, then the fox and he eats the corn!? :P
-
they all ride the goose and they all cross ? :)
-
hahahahaha!! hahahaha!! from where did the chicken come from?!!!! KAM!!
lol!! and yes ur right if u meant that the chicken is da goose!!
WE HAVE A WINNER HERE PEOPLE!! A SMART PERSON!!!!! ;D ;D (Kam)
NICE try zero and abdo lol!!
-
boo, that was going to be my next reply :/
-
hahaha :P its alright dude. C'mon give us more riddles :D
-
hahahahaha!! hahahaha!! from where did the chicken come from?!!!! KAM!!
lol!! and yes ur right if u meant that the chicken is da goose!!
WE HAVE A WINNER HERE PEOPLE!! A SMART PERSON!!!!! ;D ;D (Kam)
NICE try zero and abdo lol!!
Thank u thank u
*bows to everyone*
um if its not much trouble can u plz +rep me, i aint trying to be selfish or anythin, or at least i hope not
and um yes i meant the goose lol
-
What is as big as you are but yet does not weigh anything!?
-
hahaha :P its alright dude. C'mon give us more riddles :D
well ok but never call a girl a dude!!lol!!
and here this one is REALLY HARD!! u better me smart!! :P
What English word is nine letters long, and can remain an English word at each step as you remove one letter at a time, right down to a single letter. List the letter you remove each time and the words that result at each step.
-
polystyrene? :P
or ur shadow :P
-
boo, that was going to be my next reply :/
tough luck mate
but dont worry
ill +rep u
cuz ur telling the truth right?
-
hahaha :P its alright dude. C'mon give us more riddles :D
well ok but never call a girl a dude!!lol!!
and here this one is REALLY HARD!! u better me smart!! :P
What English word is nine letters long, and can remain an English word at each step as you remove one letter at a time, right down to a single letter. List the letter you remove each time and the words that result at each step.
Dude=abdulrahman :P
-
polystyrene? :P
or ur shadow :P
shadow is right :P
-
ya Kam have a point!! whoever wins should be +rep!! so here kam +rep for u!!
-
haha yes, and i +rep'd u By the way :P
-
STARTLING
ok, so here comes the explanation
STARTLING is nine letters, as you said
taking away the L makes it STARTING
taking way the T makes it STARING
taking away the A makes it STRING
taking away the R makes it STING
taking away the T makes it SING
taking away the G makes it SIN
taking away the S makes it IN
last letter is I, which is still a valid word
HAHAHA smart boy on a roll!
-
ya Kam have a point!! whoever wins should be +rep!! so here kam +rep for u!!
e7im :D
-
hahaha :P its alright dude. C'mon give us more riddles :D
well ok but never call a girl a dude!!lol!!
and here this one is REALLY HARD!! u better me smart!! :P
What English word is nine letters long, and can remain an English word at each step as you remove one letter at a time, right down to a single letter. List the letter you remove each time and the words that result at each step.
does it have anything to do with a mailbox or a message or a postman or mailman or somat like tht?
-
thanks monica nad abdulrahman
thank u a lot for my first two reps ever ;D
-
Yea i was going to say that too lol, remove the L first, then t, then a, then r, then t, then g, then s, then n. and ur left with i :D
-
Yea i was going to say that too lol, remove the L first, then t, then a, then r, then t, then g, then s, then n. and ur left with i :D
which word?
-
here's a riddle
The person who makes it has no need for it. The person who buys it doesn't use it. The person who does use it, does not know he/she is using it. What is it? ;D
-
Yea i was going to say that too lol, remove the L first, then t, then a, then r, then t, then g, then s, then n. and ur left with i :D
which word?
Startling, look up for the explanation (my previous reply)
-
a coffin ?
-
ukh ok OMAR is da winner people(which i believe he got from google or already knew it) :P
someone +rep him!! :-\ (i +rep him b4 so i cant again)
and abdo i + repped u
ur welcome Kam!!
-
Yea i was going to say that too lol, remove the L first, then t, then a, then r, then t, then g, then s, then n. and ur left with i :D
which word?
Startling, look up for the explanation (my previous reply)
oh right
-
a coffin ?
yea correct. My riddles seem to be really easy :P
-
ukh ok OMAR is da winner people(which i believe he got from google or already knew it) :P
someone +rep him!! :-\ (i +rep him b4 so i cant again)
and abdo i + repped u
ur welcome Kam!!
yay!
and no, i didn't google it, i remember reading it my email a few months ago lol
-
I'm as light as a feather, yet the strongest man cannot hold me much more than a minute. What am I? ::)
-
I'm as light as a feather, yet the strongest man cannot hold me much more than a minute. What am I? ::)
fire?
-
I'm as light as a feather, yet the strongest man cannot hold me much more than a minute. What am I? ::)
air ?
-
I'm as light as a feather, yet the strongest man cannot hold me much more than a minute. What am I? ::)
AIR!!
-
I'm as light as a feather, yet the strongest man cannot hold me much more than a minute. What am I? ::)
air
as in the air u breathe
right?
-
I'm as light as a feather, yet the strongest man cannot hold me much more than a minute. What am I? ::)
air
as in the air u breathe
right?
YES :D
-
yay
geniuses around
way to go ppl
-
I'm as light as a feather, yet the strongest man cannot hold me much more than a minute. What am I? ::)
AIR!!
HAHAHA :D
-
ok I SAID AIR!! u guyz asked if it was air or not!! u said air?? while i said AIR!!
SO I AM THE WINNER PEOPLE!! SO GIVE ME MY PRIZE!!
-
It's breath :P
-
i was laughing cuz i said it first :P ( so i beat u :D ) but dw ill +rep u in 2hrs :P
-
ok, how about this one (easy starter)
A cowboy comes into town on Friday, stays for two days and leaves on Friday, how come?
and calm down mony, i +repped u :P
-
ok I SAID AIR!! u guyz asked if it was air or not!! u said air?? while i said AIR!!
SO I AM THE WINNER PEOPLE!! SO GIVE ME MY PRIZE!!
i +repped u too
-
ok, how about this one (easy starter)
A cowboy comes into town on Friday, stays for two days and leaves on Friday, how come?
and calm down mony, i +repped u :P
His horse is called Fridat ;D
-
friday*
-
Brad stared through the dirty soot-smeared window on the 22nd floor of the office tower. Overcome with depression he slid the window open and jumped through it. It was a sheer drop outside the building to the ground. Miraculously after he landed he was completely unhurt. Since there was nothing to cushion his fall or slow his descent, how could he have survived the fall?
-
ok I SAID AIR!! u guyz asked if it was air or not!! u said air?? while i said AIR!!
SO I AM THE WINNER PEOPLE!! SO GIVE ME MY PRIZE!!
+rep :D
-
ITS THE NAME OF HIS HORSE!!
HAHA!!AND THANK U PEOPLE!!
-
solve this peeps, its not too hard
Brad stared through the dirty soot-smeared window on the 22nd floor of the office tower. Overcome with depression he slid the window open and jumped through it. It was a sheer drop outside the building to the ground. Miraculously after he landed he was completely unhurt. Since there was nothing to cushion his fall or slow his descent, how could he have survived the fall?
-
Brad stared through the dirty soot-smeared window on the 22nd floor of the office tower. Overcome with depression he slid the window open and jumped through it. It was a sheer drop outside the building to the ground. Miraculously after he landed he was completely unhurt. Since there was nothing to cushion his fall or slow his descent, how could he have survived the fall?
DRUMS!!
haha sanity told me this one in da beginning of da thread lol!!
-
Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. And whoever knows it wants it not.
this is a tough one :D :P
-
Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. And whoever knows it wants it not.
this is a tough one :D :P
a secret?! :P
-
plz dont google it.....this will break the fun
-
solve mine, ill reveal the answer in 10 mins :P
-
CORRECT and +repped u zero,
-
Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. And whoever knows it wants it not.
this is a tough one :D :P
a secret?! :P
NOT A SECRET!!!!
every1 says its a secret!.......its far way deeper than that lol
-
Brad stared through the dirty soot-smeared window on the 22nd floor of the office tower. Overcome with depression he slid the window open and jumped through it. It was a sheer drop outside the building to the ground. Miraculously after he landed he was completely unhurt. Since there was nothing to cushion his fall or slow his descent, how could he have survived the fall?
DRUMS!!
haha sanity told me this one in da beginning of da thread lol!!
drums? why drums?
i thought he was cleaning the window and he went inside?
-
Brad stared through the dirty soot-smeared window on the 22nd floor of the office tower. Overcome with depression he slid the window open and jumped through it. It was a sheer drop outside the building to the ground. Miraculously after he landed he was completely unhurt. Since there was nothing to cushion his fall or slow his descent, how could he have survived the fall?
DRUMS!!
haha sanity told me this one in da beginning of da thread lol!!
LOL........it was funny, and KAM got it right lol
-
its not drums :p
-
is it disease? ???
-
Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. And whoever knows it wants it not.
this is a tough one :D :P
poo ?
-
HAHA!! POO!!
-
Teacher: Jim, could u show me where America is?
Jim: here it is!
Teacher: Good.Noe students..who discovered America?
Students: JIM!! =p
-
solve this peeps, its not too hard
Brad stared through the dirty soot-smeared window on the 22nd floor of the office tower. Overcome with depression he slid the window open and jumped through it. It was a sheer drop outside the building to the ground. Miraculously after he landed he was completely unhurt. Since there was nothing to cushion his fall or slow his descent, how could he have survived the fall?
He was cleaning the window, then jumped in!? ;D
-
lmao !
-
is it disease? ???
YOU ALREADY SOLVED IT!!!
he was cleaning the windows and jumped to the inside and didnt die!
-
solve this peeps, its not too hard
Brad stared through the dirty soot-smeared window on the 22nd floor of the office tower. Overcome with depression he slid the window open and jumped through it. It was a sheer drop outside the building to the ground. Miraculously after he landed he was completely unhurt. Since there was nothing to cushion his fall or slow his descent, how could he have survived the fall?
He was cleaning the window, then jumped in!? ;D
yup :)
-
Teacher: Jim, could u show me where America is?
Jim: here it is!
Teacher: Good.Noe students..who discovered America?
Students: JIM!! =p
thts a good one
haha very funny
for the disease thingy
i was talking bout ur the other riddle
the one about the make it thingy
-
Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. And whoever knows it wants it not.
this is a tough one :D :P
fake cash
-
this one is kinda funny too :P and whats the answer sanity to ur riddle ?
I dig out tiny caves, and store gold and silver in them. I also build bridges of silver and make crowns of gold. They are the smallest you could imagine. Sooner or later everybody needs my help, yet many people are afraid to let me help them.
Who am I?
-
Teacher: Jim, could u show me where America is?
Jim: here it is!
Teacher: Good.Noe students..who discovered America?
Students: JIM!! =p
haha funny!! +rep for u cuz ur rep seems low!!lol!!
-
Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. And whoever knows it wants it not.
this is a tough one :D :P
fake cash
its counterfeit money......u got it right, but most probably u googled it cuz its not that easy, or u knew it already :P :P
-
this one is kinda funny too :P and whats the answer sanity to ur riddle ?
I dig out tiny caves, and store gold and silver in them. I also build bridges of silver and make crowns of gold. They are the smallest you could imagine. Sooner or later everybody needs my help, yet many people are afraid to let me help them.
Who am I?
Banker
-
Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. And whoever knows it wants it not.
this is a tough one :D :P
fake cash
its counterfeit money......u got it right, but most probably u googled it cuz its not that easy, or u knew it already :P :P
My answer would count :P
and no omer its not banker
-
this one is kinda funny too :P and whats the answer sanity to ur riddle ?
I dig out tiny caves, and store gold and silver in them. I also build bridges of silver and make crowns of gold. They are the smallest you could imagine. Sooner or later everybody needs my help, yet many people are afraid to let me help them.
Who am I?
dentist?
-
this one is kinda funny too :P and whats the answer sanity to ur riddle ?
I dig out tiny caves, and store gold and silver in them. I also build bridges of silver and make crowns of gold. They are the smallest you could imagine. Sooner or later everybody needs my help, yet many people are afraid to let me help them.
Who am I?
the dentist?
-
Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. And whoever knows it wants it not.
this is a tough one :D :P
fake cash
its counterfeit money......u got it right, but most probably u googled it cuz its not that easy, or u knew it already :P :P
nah, i just hapenned to be studying for my economics a short time ago :P (we still didn't do any paper yet lol)
nyways, gtg now, peace!
-
yup dentist :)
-
this one is kinda funny too :P and whats the answer sanity to ur riddle ?
I dig out tiny caves, and store gold and silver in them. I also build bridges of silver and make crowns of gold. They are the smallest you could imagine. Sooner or later everybody needs my help, yet many people are afraid to let me help them.
Who am I?
NOOOOOO I WAS ABOUT TO SAY DENTIST!!
OK HERE IS MA ANSWER DENTIST!!
-
a matter of seconds...the problem is that i have many websites opened so it took time to be sent and kam got it first :(
-
OK WAIT I AM DA WINNER!!
becuz sanity and kam said dentist?? while i said dentist!!
i was sure but they were not!!
-
here is another one!!
You can take away the whole and still have some left. You can take away some and still have the whole left. What is it?
-
OK WAIT I AM DA WINNER!!
becuz sanity and kam said dentist?? while i said dentist!!
i was sure but they were not!!
we use the question method in answering cuz we wait for an answer of "yes, correct" or "no its not"....thats y the !! is similar to ??
lol :P
-
hahahahahahahaha monii lool, maybe its true, ur still a winner :P
-
WHOLESOME!!!!
this one is funny lol
-
OK WAIT I AM DA WINNER!!
becuz sanity and kam said dentist?? while i said dentist!!
i was sure but they were not!!
we use the question method in answering cuz we wait for an answer of "yes, correct" or "no its not"....thats y the !! is similar to ??
lol :P
yupyup exactly
-
we are all winners after all 8)
-
i got this one right i hope...u can use some + rep lol
-
i got this one right i hope...u can use some + rep lol
ill give u one
but give me one too
i mean look at my reps
i just got em today
feel sorry for me ppl
and thx abdulrahman and monica again
-
I +rep you both ;D now +rep me too ;)
-
lol dw it happens to everyone, just keep posting and acting friendly and they will give u the rep if u deserve it :)
-
thx people!! haha!!
sanity in da exam u dont write in ??? u studied u should be sure so u write in !! :P :P
oh sanity u won!!
ukh i have been tryin to post since forever!!!
WHENEVER I POST this SAYS!!
Warning - while you were typing a new reply has been posted. You may wish to review your post.
OH MY GOD PEOPLE!!!!!!!!
-
i got this one right i hope...u can use some + rep lol
ill give u one
but give me one too
i mean look at my reps
i just got em today
feel sorry for me ppl
and thx abdulrahman and monica again
u got it :D
-
ill Be right back peeps :)
-
hey mony.......50 more posts till the 600th......we gotta party with each other, and with roxy here and eamy too lol
-
lets keep this thread alive 8) keep posting ppl! :P
TYT abdulrahman
-
g2g now ppl.....
cya all l8r lol :D
bye
-
g2g now ppl.....
cya all l8r lol :D
bye
OH YA WE GOTTA PARTY!! lol!!
ill wait for u people till tom to party!!
-
g2g now ppl.....
cya all l8r lol :D
bye
peace bro :D
-
i got one
with thieves i consort
with the vilest in short
im quite at my ease in depravity
yet all divines use me
and savants cant lose me
for i am the centre of gravity
what am i?
its not really that difficult
just clear ur mind for a bit
-
i got one
with thieves i consort
with the vilest in short
im quite at my ease in depravity
yet all divines use me
and savants cant lose me
for i am the centre of gravity
what am i?
its not really that difficult
just clear ur mind for a bit
sun!? :P
-
and yea zero lets keep this thread alive it is really fun wid u guys!!
u r sooo much welcome kam!!
and sanity ill post maybe 20 today and leave 30 for tom lol!!
-
i got one
with thieves i consort
with the vilest in short
im quite at my ease in depravity
yet all divines use me
and savants cant lose me
for i am the centre of gravity
what am i?
its not really that difficult
just clear ur mind for a bit
sun!? :P
nope lol ;)
-
What time is it at your country!? ;D
-
i got one
with thieves i consort
with the vilest in short
im quite at my ease in depravity
yet all divines use me
and savants cant lose me
for i am the centre of gravity
what am i?
its not really that difficult
just clear ur mind for a bit
sun!? :P
nope lol ;)
earth
-
haha my friend gave me that riddle ages ago, i wont say a word ;)
-
What time is it at your country!? ;D
its 10:43
-
i got one
with thieves i consort
with the vilest in short
im quite at my ease in depravity
yet all divines use me
and savants cant lose me
for i am the centre of gravity
what am i?
its not really that difficult
just clear ur mind for a bit
sun!? :P
nope lol ;)
earth
nope
and thanks abdulrahman
-
Welcome back abdulrahman :P
-
money!? :-\
-
What time is it at your country!? ;D
its 10:43
Where do u live moni its the same time here, so u must be around me somewhere :P
-
nope
u quit?
-
Welcome back abdulrahman :P
Thank You ZZ :)
-
you guys are in africa content?
-
What time is it at your country!? ;D
its 10:43
Where do u live moni its the same time here, so u must be around me somewhere :P
i am Egyptian but live in KSA...wat abt u??
-
yea I quit :P
-
yea I quit :P
its the letter "V"
;D
-
:P yea one hour difference from here is KSA
-
Palestinian living in Qatar, so we are both living in the middle east :D
-
yea I quit :P
its the letter "V"
;D
ahh i never thought of that :P
-
yea I quit :P
its the letter "V"
;D
haha kam!!
-
hey
im a palistinian living in q8
cool so we r pretty close eh?
-
I live in middleeast too ;D
-
indeed :)
meh, i dont want to study, but its killing me inside lol, felt like saying that :P
-
and now im hungry Be right back :P
-
i got another one
you use me between ur head and ur toes
the more i works the thinner i grows
what am i?
-
I gotta go :P yalla salam guys :D i will talk to you tommorw
-
ya abdo and kam we r kind of neighbors!!lol!!
my best best friend is Jordanian and i have also anothe one Egyptian
and wat about u Zero?
and zero ur a boy right??!
-
and now im hungry Be right back :P
it seems u always r!!lol!!
all do abdos i know like food and r fat!!lol!!
-
i got another one
you use me between ur head and ur toes
the more i works the thinner i grows
what am i?
ok i quit!!what is it??
shampoo??lol!!
gel??
-
i got another one
you use me between ur head and ur toes
the more i works the thinner i grows
what am i?
ok i quit!!what is it??
shampoo??lol!!
very close
its soap
lol
gel??
-
haha, then i almost got it!!
so kam wat subjects do u take?
-
arabic
english
maths
economics
arabic
islamic, if tht counts
biology
chemistry
physics
geography my favourite
yup thts about it
no wait
and IT
-
wot aabout u?
-
and now im hungry Be right back :P
it seems u always r!!lol!!
all do abdos i know like food and r fat!!lol!!
nope i dont eat much lol, and im not fat XD
u do get hungry after 14hrs of not eating much :P
-
and now im hungry Be right back :P
it seems u always r!!lol!!
all do abdos i know like food and r fat!!lol!!
nope i dont eat much lol, and im not fat XD
u do get hungry after 14hrs of not eating much :P
hey
welcome back
-
arabic
english
maths
economics
arabic
islamic, if tht counts
biology
chemistry
physics
geography my favourite
yup thts about it
no wait
and IT
Someone does these same subjects, but does not do biology, and does bus. st, he also does not do economics, but does pe. who is he ? :P
-
thanks kam :)
-
arabic
english
maths
economics
arabic
islamic, if tht counts
biology
chemistry
physics
geography my favourite
yup thts about it
no wait
and IT
Someone does these same subjects, but does not do biology, and does bus. st, he also does not do economics, but does pe. who is he ? :P
im guessing its u?
-
Yes :P
-
Yes :P
so u and monica are in Saudi Arabia?
-
im in Qatar, moni is in Saudia
-
lol!! ok kam my subjects r:
French
Math
English
Accounting
Business
Chemistry
ICT
-
u know it is really cool when u meet people in da same city or country as u!!lol!!
-
coooll
so got any riddles or jokes?
im in kuwait
so im pretty close
-
someone has to leave when he reaches 500 posts, he has 5 left, who is he ? :P
-
someone has to leave when he reaches 500 posts, he has 5 left, who is he ? :P
haha!! ABDO!!
-
uhh you again
-
yup :)
By the way moni u had 8 reps a few hours ago, now ur 14 :O gratz :D
~ 4 left ~
-
right
i reached 50 posts
and i gtg
see u guys later
and good luck with ur exams
;D
-
thanks, gl to u 2, and nice meeting u :)
~ 3 left ~ ( wonder what ill study )
-
good luck kam!!
but hey Qatar is inside Kuwait right??
-
good luck kam!!
but hey Qatar is inside Kuwait right??
lmaoo, we are neighbours and u dont know >.< no its a country by itself lool
-
ok wait i am confused!! i am bad at this srry!!
but Kuwait is different than Qatar??!! ???
-
YES!! XD
-
lol!!ok!!
soooo wats up abdo?? lol!!
ya forgot to mention good luck for ur Geo tom!!
-
Nothing, its 11.30 and i have to wake up at 7.30 tmr, geo exam:/
i hate waking up in the morning for school, thats the thing i hate most lol, and now i have to go because i have struck my 500th post :D, i wonder if i become a geek or stay the same lol, we are about to find out :D
so byebye moni, ill be back in an hr or so :P and will prob study chem -.-
EDIT> WooT, the 500 looks nice :D
-
no u will be a geek after 100 posts more!!lol!!
but congrats anyway!!
i gtg too!! ill come back tom lol!!
byezzzz!!
-
nope imma geek :D and i broke me 500 :/
have a nice day for the last fo its 30 mins :P
and have a nice weekend if u can :)
-
hey guyz... wotup ...?
-
ROXY!! HAHAHAHA!!
u come when we r about to leave!! haha!!
nuthin much u??
haha roxy check out the difference between both our posts!! sharply 100!!
-
hey rox?? r u there???
-
ok den gtg!!
Roxy dont miss my party for da 600th post tom inshallah!!(the party will be on this thread)
BYE PEOPLE!! GROUP HUG!! :-* :-* :-*
-
lol yeah I am... my stoooopid Internet Explorer isnt wrkin properly it taes ageeeeees for me to reply
sorrrry
lol. I know.. if I had been on like I was be4 then I wud have 800 posts by now :P
-
now real riddle
a girl has ten match boxes
each has ten matches
each match weights 1g
except one box which has matches each weighin' 2g
she has a balance to be used only once (as in she can place the matches once AND THATS IT)
question: how would she knw which box has the 2g match stick?
+5 rep for the genius who knws the answer ;D :D
have fun ;)
-
now real riddle
a girl has ten match boxes
each has ten matches
each match weights 1g
except one box which has matches each weighin' 2g
she has a balance to be used only once (as in she can place the matches once AND THATS IT)
question: how would she knw which box has the 2g match stick?
+5 rep for the genius who knws the answer ;D :D
have fun ;)
Im good with riddles but this one caught me up!!
Can't solve it but would like to know the answer after everyone trying ofcourse!
-
kk .. she can hold them one by one in her hand .. she will probably kno which 1 is double the weight of the others and then make sure by weighing it with the balance ;)
-
ig girl : gud luk tryin'...
twilight: nope dats nt it...ntin' wid her hands :)
-
then wut ??? count them?
-
ig girl : gud luk tryin'...
twilight: nope dats nt it...ntin' wid her hands :)
I cant think anymore ;D
-
y duz she havta complicate it .. all she hasto do is count them :D
-
y duz she havta complicate it .. all she hasto do is count them :D
ya exactly!!lol
-
now real riddle
a girl has ten match boxes
each has ten matches
each match weights 1g
except one box which has matches each weighin' 2g
she has a balance to be used only once (as in she can place the matches once AND THATS IT)
question: how would she knw which box has the 2g match stick?
+5 rep for the genius who knws the answer ;D :D
have fun ;)
a friend of mine told me this one before......and i actually solved it already, but cant remember the solution as it was a long time ago.......perhaps i can solve it again.
-
put all the matches on the balance then remove them one by one? :P
-
The bigger box will hav the 2g matches .. then she cud check by weighing .. or putting two of the lighter boxes on the balance and check its mass . I kno its stupid .. but its just a try .. :D
-
If you put the boxes on either side of the balance then the box you want is the last one you put on that makes it tilt when there or the same number of boxes on each side or the last box you put on that makes it balance when there are different numbers of boxes on each side
-
@ zerozero: she gotta use it only once ...that is one readin' and thats it
@ twilight: lol no ;D..bt keep tryin' ;)
@ astarmath: its a top pan balanc nt the one with one pan on each side :)
so do i say the answer??
gives a staisfactory feelin' 2 b the only one who knows 8) :P :P
-
ok wait!! ill try!!lol!!
-
ok ummm, the total weight should be 110....
so she keeps addin box after box...and the weight everytime will increase by 10g when it increases by 20g then she will now that the last box she added is the 2g box!!
lol!! i was just tryin!!
-
:P damn I was going to say that..
-
:P damn I was going to say that..
lol!! lets see if its right or wrong...
where r u sweetest girl??
-
:P damn I was going to say that..
lol!! lets see if its right or wrong...
where r u sweetest girl??
I wish we could nudge, like we do in MSN :P
-
haha ya!! u could suggest that to astar!! :D
ok let me try again.... we burn all da matches...and da one which burns the most is the 2 g one!
lol!!
-
or the one which produces the most ash might be the one!!lol!!
-
then what's the use of the balance? :P
-
the box with the 2g matches will have the mass on the back that says "net weight : 20 grams"
ROFL......LOLzzz
-
the box with the 2g matches will have the mass on the back that says "net weight : 20 grams"
ROFL......LOLzzz
seriously???!!! is that da answer!!! :o
-
hahahaha ok what if it wasn't written!? :P
-
hahahaha ok what if it wasn't written!? :P
exactly?!!
and where is that girl??!!! ??? ??? ???
-
*NUDGE* *NUDGE* *NUDGE*!!!!! No answer :( :P
-
sweetest angel is busy in the arcade index, so i dont think she will get ur nudges :P
-
ukhhh she is PLAYIN AND LEAVIN US HERE!! THINKIN AND THINKIN >:( >:( >:( >:(
SOMEONE CALL HER!! LOL!!
-
lol!! i pmed her!! ;D
-
hey guys when will I have three stars!? :P
-
ithink when u post 200 post cuz ull have 4 when u have 300 posts
-
ya guys
sry that tennis ting seems to b specially designd 2 addict u ><
lol wats up? :P
-
bdw dat answer was wrong
REPEAT:the balance readin' is to b taken only once
THINK THINK THINK 8)
-
:( my brain isn't working because of your riddle! tell us the answer :P
-
bdw dat answer was wrong
REPEAT:the balance readin' is to b taken only once
THINK THINK THINK 8)
ya tell the answer!!!!!!!
-
sure??
any1 wanna try for a +rep :P
well i dnt knw if da prize is dat allurin' bt dats all i can do ;D
soo??
-
you're killing us :(
-
I have three starsss!!!!!! :o now we're talkin' 8)
-
congrats Zero!!
and sweetest SAY THE ANSWER!!!!
-
okay so no one knws it then here's the answer
the girl takes one match frm da firat box and puts it on the balance
2 matches frm the second box
3 from third
4 frm fourth
so on till she put 10 matches frm the tenth box
if the increase in total expected weight is 2g then its the first box
if the increase in total expected weigth is 4g then its the second box
if increase in 6g then third and so on
THAT WAS EASY PPL!!!
-
Thank :D
but we said, We can put the first box and add more boxes, then if the change in balance is 20g+ then the last box we put was the 2g matches..so its the same idea
-
okay so no one knws it then here's the answer
the girl takes one match frm da firat box and puts it on the balance
2 matches frm the second box
3 from third
4 frm fourth
so on till she put 10 matches frm the tenth box
if the increase in total expected weight is 2g then its the first box
if the increase in total expected weigth is 4g then its the second box
if increase in 6g then third and so on
THAT WAS EASY PPL!!!
HEYYYYY SO I GOT THE CORRECT ANSWER PEOPLE!!!
YAYAYAYAYAYA!!
WOHOOOOOOOOO!! I AM SMART!! :P :P
-
LOL haha mabrook :P
-
ok ummm, the total weight should be 110....
so she keeps addin box after box...and the weight everytime will increase by 10g when it increases by 20g then she will now that the last box she added is the 2g box!!
lol!! i was just tryin!!
here it is!! :P :P :P
-
I'm bored! :P
-
lol!! i just finished makin a cream caramel!! and i am going to eat it now :P :P :P
so zero where do u come from??
-
I'm from Iraq, but I live UAE.
Does anyone watch anime?! ;D
-
I'm from Iraq, but I live UAE.
Does anyone watch anime?! ;D
meeeeeeeeeeee!! i adore them!! lol!!
-
coool :P Im reading one piece right now!!! whats your fav. anime?! :D
-
coool :P Im reading one piece right now!!! whats your fav. anime?! :D
i read a manga called "Kare First Love"
its awesome!! i still didnt continue it....and i heard vampire night is a very good one..
and by da way ill keep modifying my post becuz i have to wait for my friends to come so that we celebrate together da 600th post!!lol!!
i take business, accounting, chemistry, english, math, french and ICT... wat about u??
and which anmie r u reading? ;D
and ya hey abdo!!
-
Pokemon is the best :)
-
hahaha :P alright! how many subjects are you taking?
-
Ofcourse pokemon is the best! its legendary! 8)
-
hey people LOOK UP I MODIFY MY POST EVERYTIME!!
NOW U MADE ME POST A NEW POST!! >:(
ok wats the name of the manga ur readin??!!
and i wonder if those people r gonna come!!(roxy, sanity, eamyzz???anyone??sweetsh?) :-\
-
coool :P Im reading one piece right now!!! whats your fav. anime?! :D
i read a manga called "Kare First Love"
its awesome!! i still didnt continue it....and i heard vampire night is a very good one..
and by da way ill keep modifying my post becuz i have to wait for my friends to come so that we celebrate together da 600th post!!lol!!
i take business, accounting, chemistry, english, math, french and ICT... wat about u??
and which anmie r u reading? ;D
and ya hey abdo!!
I take Chem, bio, phy, math, english second language and arabic first language
I just finished reading the new One Piece manga, IT WAS AMAZING :o
-
hey people LOOK UP I MODIFY MY POST EVERYTIME!!
NOW U MADE ME POST A NEW POST!! >:(
It's alright, you still have 7 more posts left :D
-
I just told you im reading One piece T_T
send them a pm if they are online
-
Sorry Mony yesterday I was so busy and you know this weekend we are very busy, happy to see you all here.
-
will she do the 600 posts now!? :P
-
Sorry Mony yesterday I was so busy and you know this weekend we are very busy, happy to see you all here.
awwww HEY SWEETSH!! i missed u!! :'( :'( :'(
lol!! i am about to post my 600th post lol!! but waitin for da rest!!
-
I hope I'll be here to congratulate you, and I missed you more.
-
What's after FEP citizn!?
-
senior citizen
then master
and im here for ya mony ;)
-
FEP Geek
-
cool when do I become a geek 8)
-
ok cool!! i am glad ur people here!! but where is Roxy?? :'(
-
The head is gold and the tail is gold, but it doesn't have a body. What is it!? ;D
-
one piece is like soo many chapters .. hard to follow .. even its anime sooo many episodes ..
i recoment these animes
Bleach
Death note
Gundam 00
seiri no moribito
Naruto ( its too much but i like shippudin series )
ouran high school host club
lol many many more ,, i've watched like almost everything ... currently because of exams many things have piled up ,cant wait to catch up
-
I started reading one piece before 3 months! :P and yea bleach, death note and naruto are goodd!!!!!
sasuke is coming to konoha now :o
-
one piece is like soo many chapters .. hard to follow .. even its anime sooo many episodes ..
i recoment these animes
Bleach
Death note
Gundam 00
seiri no moribito
Naruto ( its too much but i like shippudin series )
ouran high school host club
lol many many more ,, i've watched like almost everything ... currently because of exams many things have piled up ,cant wait to catch up
ohhh emii my friend!!lol!! u have to be my friend!!lol!! DONT RUN AWAY!! i sooo much wanna speak to u!! ahhhhh i love anime and actually no one knows becuz i thought i was a kid for likin them!!
i downloaded many in ma computer to read and watch after da IGCSE inshallah!! ;D
-
ok now i only have 3 left!!
-
no one is there to celebrate wid me!!!
sanity hadrabek begad lama tigi online!! >:(
sweetsh??!! u there?? :-\
Roxyyy............. :(
-
I'm here 8)
-
Yes studying physics.
-
anime = animations ?? :-[
-
lol!! anime is those animations in Japanese!!lol!!
ya people thx!!
-
ohhh, those lame cartoons :P
no offence k, but i HATE anime
and monica, one post to go !! congrats !!!
-
MY 600TH POST PEOPLE!! ;D ;D ;D
ROXY ND SANITY WISH U WERE HERE PEOPLE!!
THXXXXX SWEETSH!!!!
HAHAHAHAHA!!
-
yeah ,, i get the shounen jump manga every month , and it have updated one pieces and all other animes ..
sure why not monica we can be friends ;)
anime is not only for kids actually it was NEVER meant to be for kids, its for adults above 14 only .
monica i can tell you about many good ones like " GINTAMA " its awesome simply . it will make you laugh to death
but exams going on now so u can watch'em after exams
-
ohhh, those lame cartoons :P
no offence k, but i HATE anime
and monica, one post to go !! congrats !!!
lol!! thx Q80BOY ur the first person who tells me CONGRATS!! :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(( cryin from happiness) lol!!
-
yeah ,, i get the shounen jump manga every month , and it have updated one pieces and all other animes ..
sure why not monica we can be friends ;)
anime is not only for kids actually it was NEVER meant to be for kids, its for adults above 14 only .
monica i can tell you about many good ones like " GINTAMA " its awesome simply . it will make you laugh to death
but exams going on now so u can watch'em after exams
OH THX EMI!! and ya anime is for adults i dunt think kids can read those stuff!lol!!
ya cool ill check the ones u told me out!! Kare First Love is really nice!!
i like comedy, drama and romantic ones!!
and hey wat do u think of vampire night??
-
gratz monica ~~ way to go
-
Congratulations 7abebty.
-
THANX PEOPLE!!! GROUP HUG!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
do u watch jdrama ? they are AWESOME simply amazing
you should watch them too , if u like anime im sure u will like them too
i think its Vampire Knight , its nice too but its a bit too much of a fairytale for me :P im into shoujo type of anime hehe im more into SHOUNEN <33
-
Group Hug =*
-
do u watch jdrama ? they are AWESOME simply amazing
you should watch them too , if u like anime im sure u will like them too
i think its Vampire Knight , its nice too but its a bit too much of a fairytale for me :P im into shoujo type of anime hehe im more into SHOUNEN <33
OK WAIT EASYYY ON ME!! what is jdrama??? and vampire knight a friend told me abt it so i really don't know much...and wats shoujo and shounen!! lol!! ??? ???
-
congratzzz mony......sry to miss ur entrance to our world of seniors :D lol
-
OH sanity!! thx!! :D
but u still missed da entrance!! >:(
lol just kiddin!! thx everyone!! :-*
-
Good numbers 3 FEP Masters, 5 Senior Citizens and 13 FEP Geeks, so proud of it.
-
:P I'M BACKKK!!!
-
Me TOOOO!
so wus happennin?
-
eyy! yo watch this ;D http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-PZNfOZXPJk
-
eyy! yo watch this ;D http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-PZNfOZXPJk
hahahahahahahahaha !!!!!!!
-
oh c'mon, its bad enough the NICKNAMES thread froze, is this thread gonna freeze too?
oh well, maybe everyone started gearing up for next a week a bit earlier than I, see y'all after the beaurtiful paper threes!
-
ahh paper 3...I wish all paper 3s were paper 1 :P guys watch this :P http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8l7QMPpH3M
-
bdw monica ur answer was wrong cuse u gotta look at the readin' once and thats it
ur answer had 2 look each time u added a box
c:
-
The head is gold and the tail is gold, but it doesn't have a body. What is it!? ;D
a ring?
a gold ring
By the way congrats monica!
-
MONYYYYYYYY ...!!!!!!!
CONGRATULATIONS MATIE !!!!! :D :D :D :-* :-* :-*
i know Im late... Im sooo sorry, but my Internet Explorer is just ot working ... I dunno wots rong with it
AND on top of that my laptop has been CONFISCATEDDD !!! so Im here TRYING to get bus. Past papers....;D
I supose thts the only way to get me on the internet :P
lol...
anywayz Congrats girll....!!!! You are now a Senior Citizen !!!!! :D
And a +repp for u ... By the way ....Did any1 bring u cake or ballons ??
okay well heres my cake and 600 balloons for u ....:P :P
Hope 2 catch up with u guyz soon... this BLOOOODY INTERNET IS DRIVING ME MAAAAAD "!!!!!!!!
okay...
Toodles..
xx
:D
-
where is every1 ???
Lol.. wen I sign out, you guyz all cum on, and I miss like hundreds of pages ...:p
ad then I cum... and every1s gone..... :(
oryt then... now Im going... and I can bet ur all gonna cum back ...:P
-
Roxyyyyyyyyy hey!!
ohhh thx loads for da party!!! :D :D :D
-
mabrook moni :P
-
mabrook moni :P
aww merciiii 3obalak!!lol!! u still have some to reach da 600!!lol!!
-
Group Hug =)
-
haha!! GROUP HUG!! :-* :-* :-*
-
bdw monica ur answer was wrong cuse u gotta look at the readin' once and thats it
ur answer had 2 look each time u added a box
c:
ITS RIGHT!! its same as ur answer girl but in different and easier way!! lol!!
-
hey people i have a nice riddle: ;D
Can you punctuate the following, in order to make it a proper English sentence?
I said that that that that that man wrote should have been underlined
-
hey people i have a nice riddle: ;D
Can you punctuate the following, in order to make it a proper English sentence?
I said that that that that that man wrote should have been underlined
I said that! That that...that...that...that manwrote; should have been underlined?
well, its a guess.
-
The head is gold and the tail is gold, but it doesn't have a body. What is it!? ;D
a gold coin??
-
hey people i have a nice riddle: ;D
Can you punctuate the following, in order to make it a proper English sentence?
I said that that that that that man wrote should have been underlined
I said that,"that that that that man wrote:'Should have been underlined.'"
just a guess...is it rite??
-
lol!! nice try people!! but No!!
;D
try again!!
-
I said that that that that that man wrote should have been underlined
that "that man wrote that" should have been underlined that I said that. ? <-- my answer
-
wrong again!! :P
-
k...now i cant wait....i give up...cn ne1 post the rite answer soon...im reallliii curious to kno...
mony plz post the answer....
i bet its gonna b damn easy...but none of us is gettin it!!!!
-
that that that that that that that -.-
-
I said that that that that that man wrote should have been underlined
simple and clear and surely wrong lol :D
-
no its not easy!! its really difficult but then anyone wanna try??!!
blah hahaha!! wrong mastey!! :P
-
hahahaha good one
-
so u give up people??!! :P :P :P
-
that i said that, "that that man wrote should have been underlined that"
-
nah....i dont think dats rite....
yea mony i give up....
speak up..
-
that i said that, "that that man wrote should have been underlined that"
u dont rearrange it, u just punctuate it.......and dont say the answer
give us a chance
-
I said that,"that 'that' that that man wrote should have been underlined."
yemken :P
-
den ok mony....dont post the answer...if theyr still tryin....
-
haha u googled it :P
-
I said that,"that 'that' that that man wrote should have been underlined."
yemken :P
SANITY IS DA WINNER PEOPLE!! (tab3an gabtaha men google!! :P)
+REP FOR U!!
-
eh i tried :D and i googled it too when i gave up :P
-
i guess mine is correct
i understood it now
it is something related to writing.........
i said that,"that 'that(word)' that(which) that man wrote should have been underline"
right????
-
LOL!! maybe i actually dont understand it!! ;D
-
YAY MEE!!!!
<3 GOOGLE :P
lol, the solution for every riddle = GOOGLE :P
sry for cheating ppl , but i was dying to know the answer not to win it (jk :D lol)>>>jk, sry again
-
hmmmm....no wonder!!!!
congrats google!!!
lollzzzz
-
haha this was the first topic in google :P
Okay, enough subscribers to the Brainpower Newsletter have contacted me about the riddle of the "thats," that I am going to do my best to explain the answer more fully. First, here is the riddle and the answer:
Can you punctuate the following, in order to make it a proper English sentence?
I said that that that that that man wrote should have been underlined
The Answer To The Riddle
I said that,"that 'that' that that man wrote should have been underlined."
The Controversy Of The Riddle
Some of you tell me that "that" can only be used four times in a row correctly. Others just want an explanation. Here's my best shot:
Let's start with some of the definitions of the word "that" in my dictionary:
(As a pronoun)
1. The one designated or implied. "What kind of soup is that?"
2. Used as the subject or object of a relative clause, esp. one defining or restricting the antecedent, sometimes replaceable by who, whom, or which: the horse that he bought.
(As a conjunction)
3. Used to introduce a subordinate clause. "I doubt that you are right."
In addition to these definitions it is possible to use any word as a noun when referring to the word itself in quotation marks: The third "that" is used in this way, as it is in this sentence as well. So to analyze the sentence now:
I said that(1),"that(2) 'that'(3) that(4) that(5) man wrote should have been underlined."
(1)The first "that" is used according to the second definition, as a conjunction. It introduces the quote. Strictly speaking it isn't necessary, but in English it is allowed. For example, either of the following two sentences are correct:
1. I said, "I don't want to do any more riddles."
2. I said that, "I don't want to do any more riddles."
(2) The second "that" follows the first pronoun definition: "The one designated or implied."
(3) The one it designates is the third "that," which has quotation marks since it references itself (it is used as a noun). This is easier to understand if you imagine another word, like "letter" in its place: I said that, "That letter that..." - except that it was not a letter written, but the word "that."
(4) The fourth "that" is used according to the second definition. This is easier to understand if you replace it with "which": I said that "that 'that' which that man wrote..."
(5) The fifth "that" refers to the man, again using the first definition: "The one designated or implied."
Clearer? Perhaps not. However, does the following sentence make sense?
I said that, "that word which that man wrote should have been underlined."
Now just replace "which" with "that," and it still makes sense, right?
I said that, "that word that that man wrote should have been underlined."
And finally, replace "word" with "that," and it is clear that the speaker is referring to a specific incidence of the word "that," in whatever the man wrote, and that the speaker thinks (for some reason) that the word should be underlined.
I said that, "that 'that' that that man wrote should have been underlined."
And that is all that I have to say about that riddle and that "that" or any other "that" that comes along. Which "that?" Never mind that.
-
i kinda understood it actually before i googled it but i made no sense to me at first......
any1 needs explanation??
-
the answer and the explanation for it is there ya abdo :D :P
-
haha!! +rep google everyone!! lol!!
here is another one!!
My life can be measured in hours,
I serve by being devoured.
Thin, I am quick
Fat, I am slow
Wind is my foe.
What am I?
-
yep, do i need to say more :P
-
dont look in google!! >:(
lol!!
-
a lamp ?
-
or a plant?
-
haha!! +rep google everyone!! lol!!
here is another one!!
My life can be measured in hours,
I serve by being devoured.
Thin, I am quick
Fat, I am slow
Wind is my foe.
What am I?
rain??
-
a lamp ?
ur kind of close!!
-
a candle?
-
i wont this time.....:P lol
promise
maybe FIRE??
-
fire??
-
oh......snity posted b4 me...
By the way is it rite??
-
i dont know yet.......but i guess it is as we both posted it (i was the 1st :P )
-
a candle?
KAM IS DA WINNER PEOPLE!!
+REP HER EVERYONE!!
-
sun
-
blahhhaaaaaahaha!! sanity and zara u lose!!!!
now someone post a riddle i wanna try!!
-
sun
u jokin right????
SUN has the wind as its foe??
-
i wrote sun too then thought of it was kinda wrong :P
-
yey thanks
;D
i got another riddle
can u translate this sentence to make a compliment
YYURYYUBICURYY4ME
-
sun
haha!! nice try dude!! u may join da game!!
-
What row of numbers comes next in this series?
1
11
21
1211
111221
312211
13112221
-
yey thanks
;D
i got another riddle
can u translate this sentence to make a compliment
YYURYYUBICURYY4ME
??? ??? ???
-
lol...am bad at da game just givin a try
-
What row of numbers comes next in this series?
1
11
21
1211
111221
312211
13112221
again ??? ??? ???
-
yey thanks
;D
i got another riddle
can u translate this sentence to make a compliment
YYURYYUBICURYY4ME
hahaha ppl i know this one u will never find it out :P unless u google it, its amazing how every joke/riddle is on google XD
-
What row of numbers comes next in this series?
1
11
21
1211
111221
312211
13112221
111321222
-
What row of numbers comes next in this series?
1
11
21
1211
111221
312211
13112221
1111322221
-
What row of numbers comes next in this series?
1
11
21
1211
111221
312211
13112221
1113213211
-
yey thanks
;D
i got another riddle
can u translate this sentence to make a compliment
YYURYYUBICURYY4ME
??? ??? ???
wat, u quit so soon???
-
haha i quit sooo soon kam!!
and lots of number and different answers for dda second one!!lolll!!
-
W00T SaN1Ty is R1g5t ! +r3p :P
-
this one is funny
WHO WILL FEEL MORE COLD FROM THE LETTERS ABCD??
-
haha i quit sooo soon kam!!
and lots of number and different answers for dda second one!!lolll!!
kk its
two wise u r, too wise u be
i see u are too wise for me
-
A ? :D
lets all say a letter someone will be right :P
-
this one is funny
WHO WILL FEEL MORE COLD FROM THE LETTERS ABCD??
the letter c?
-
haha omg the riddle isnt in google or yahoo, i real challenge ! :D
-
C!! NOO NO B!! NO I MEANT D!!
-
u gotta say a reason for ur answer.....not just by pickin a letter :P
makin it tougher than it looks :P
-
haha i quit sooo soon kam!!
and lots of number and different answers for dda second one!!lolll!!
kk its
two wise u r, too wise u be
i see u are too wise for me
but i cant see any "w" lol!!
-
heres another....
I am related to the water but I am not wet. I am related with a shadow but I am multi colored. I am an illusion but I show what is real. What am I?
-
haha omg the riddle isnt in google or yahoo, i real challenge ! :D
i know its not there :P!!
MUWAHAHAHAHAHA :P
By the way, when u all know the answer, u r gonna kill me then kill each other and the last one standing will commit suicide lol
-
lets just solve the riddles one by one plz.....to not get mixed up !
-
D = highest surface area ? :P
-
no w as in two Ys
and um is it d bcus um cold has c in it but in the alphabet um its pronounced as see
so d, im guessing
tho im pretty sure its wrong
-
haha!! sanity!! >:( >:( say da answer!!
and zara is it oxygen??lol!!
-
or they all are because theyre in all CAPS LOCK ? :D
-
heres another....
I am related to the water but I am not wet. I am related with a shadow but I am multi colored. I am an illusion but I show what is real. What am I?
rainbow i guess???
and do u really want to know the answer of my riddle????
-
yes :P
-
i just googled the answer to snitys ques...
hahaha...
no mony its nt oxygen...
-
B BECAUSE BOTH THE SIDE A/C IS THEIR
-
ok...now no mor cheating...
vll play sincerely...
srry snity...but i cudnt help..
-
no its nt rainbow
-
B BECAUSE BOTH THE SIDE A/C IS THEIR
wot does tht mean?
-
cmon what is it ? i wanna go sleep lol
-
the B is surrounded by A/C
thats the answer ppl.....ZARA is the winner :D lol
im ready to die :P LOLzz
-
here is one
no googlin' it guys:
A black dog stands in the middle of an intersecton in a town painted black. None of the street lights are working due to a power failure caused by a storm. A car with two broken headlights drives towards the dog but turns in time to avoid hitting him. How could the driver have seen the dog in time?
-
no man m nt...google is...lollzzz
but as i said b4 v wont cheat nemor....
sincere game...
-
which word starts with the letter e ends with the letter e but only has one letter in it?
this is a fast one before i go and sleep.....so please answer quickly :P llol
-
here is one
no googlin' it guys:
A black dog stands in the middle of an intersecton in a town painted black. None of the street lights are working due to a power failure caused by a storm. A car with two broken headlights drives towards the dog but turns in time to avoid hitting him. How could the driver have seen the dog in time?
because of his shiny teeth??
-
here is one
no googlin' it guys:
A black dog stands in the middle of an intersecton in a town painted black. None of the street lights are working due to a power failure caused by a storm. A car with two broken headlights drives towards the dog but turns in time to avoid hitting him. How could the driver have seen the dog in time?
i know this one from before......and i couldnt understand the asnwer
solution::
what time is it?
-
which word starts with the letter e ends with the letter e but only has one letter in it?
this is a fast one before i go and sleep.....so please answer quickly :P llol
envelope ;D
-
the B is surrounded by A/C
thats the answer ppl.....ZARA is the winner :D lol
im ready to die :P LOLzz
haha!! lazem tatdarem tab3an!! >:( >:( >:(
el riddles di!! yasater!! >:(
-
gtg byebye peeps Take care :P
-
Thanks for searchin for it :P
and ur a winner, and i g2g
cya l8r peeps!
-
i didnt search
and yes i gtg too
bubye ;)
-
kz...bbye guys...
gud nite!!
-
um not cuse of his teeth
and yes the answer has to do with time
w 2ih 2lA/C dih....2na 2etna2at :P
-
BYE EVERYONE!! AND GOOOOD NIGHT!!
DONT FORGET TO PRAY ISHA!!LOL!!
-
i didnt search
and yes i gtg too
bubye ;)
i was jokin dude ;)
-
um not cuse of his teeth
and yes the answer has to do with time
w 2ih 2lA/C dih....2na 2etna2at :P
yea i figured dat out l8r...
it was in daylight...
-
heres 1...i am da closest person to u
-
heres 1...i am da closest person to u
SHADOW??
-
yes daylight bravooooooo
'n wat about da closest one 2 u??
i dnt gt da question
'n mony 2na mashaltsh lesa :-\
2lmozakra sha3'lani 3an 2lsala :'(
-
heres 1...i am da closest person to u
SHADOW??
yh
-
monica r u also goin 2 bed?? :'(
-
k i didnt get lil^$tar ques...
neways...heres another...
There was a doctor and his son they were driving to there house then all of the sudden they were in a car crash the doctor died but the son stays alive but needs an operation when the son arrives at the hospital the doctor says I cant operate this boy.....because he is my son. How can this be?
-
its his mum
-
HAHA!! ma3lesh ya sweetest girl!! bas bardek lazem tasali >:( >:( >:(
haha!! and ya lil star i am da winner so u must give me +rep!!lol!!
and i am not going to bed!!
ah sweetest girl ana ba73l el question fa wait!! srry if i am slow!!lol!!
-
its his mum
yup...correct!!!
was too easy....
-
ok monica am giving u +rep
-
its his mum
yup...correct!!!
was too easy....
yh or mayb i had 2 just get 1 ryt 2day...cos this ma first ryt answer
-
ok monica am giving u +rep
oh thx +rep for u too!!
-
ayt gud nyt...best of dream
-
ayt gud nyt...best of dream
gooood night!! join us tom isa!! we do this everyday at night!!lol!!its fun!!
byee!!
-
zara r u also of 2 bed
-
HAHA!! ma3lesh ya sweetest girl!! bas bardek lazem tasali >:( >:( >:(
haha!! and ya lil star i am da winner so u must give me +rep!!lol!!
and i am not going to bed!!
ah sweetest girl ana ba73l el question fa wait!! srry if i am slow!!lol!!
bera7tek =D 2lexam lsa b3d yomein =)
-
ayts i will
-
zara r u also of 2 bed
nopes...
sum mor mins ova hea...
-
ayt...
-
You get many of me but never enough. After the last one your life soon will snuff. You may have one of me but one day a year When the last one is gone your life disappears. What am I?
-
ok i got one!!
I have three letters, and I read the same forward and backwards. I rhyme with a word that is important to everyone. What word am I?
-
You get many of me but never enough. After the last one your life soon will snuff. You may have one of me but one day a year When the last one is gone your life disappears. What am I?
breath?
-
ok i got one!!
I have three letters, and I read the same forward and backwards. I rhyme with a word that is important to everyone. What word am I?
eve??
-
You get many of me but never enough. After the last one your life soon will snuff. You may have one of me but one day a year When the last one is gone your life disappears. What am I?
breath?
nopes...
-
You get many of me but never enough. After the last one your life soon will snuff. You may have one of me but one day a year When the last one is gone your life disappears. What am I?
air
-
You get many of me but never enough. After the last one your life soon will snuff. You may have one of me but one day a year When the last one is gone your life disappears. What am I?
air
no..
-
ok i got one!!
I have three letters, and I read the same forward and backwards. I rhyme with a word that is important to everyone. What word am I?
eye?
-
wohoooo!! PEOPLE SWEETEST GIRL IS DA WINNER!!
and sweety el sora eli enti 7ataha to7fa!!lol!! i really liked this pic!!
-
You get many of me but never enough. After the last one your life soon will snuff. You may have one of me but one day a year When the last one is gone your life disappears. What am I?
age
-
so u guys want the answer to m riddle??
or still wanna try?
-
You get many of me but never enough. After the last one your life soon will snuff. You may have one of me but one day a year When the last one is gone your life disappears. What am I?
age
ok...ur close..
-
You get many of me but never enough. After the last one your life soon will snuff. You may have one of me but one day a year When the last one is gone your life disappears. What am I?
age
ok...ur close..
birthday
-
yup!!!!
woohhhoooo....lil^$tar's the WINNER!!!
+rep!!
-
wohoooo!! PEOPLE SWEETEST GIRL IS DA WINNER!!
and sweety el sora eli enti 7ataha to7fa!!lol!! i really liked this pic!!
thanku honey
wont i get a +rep for the mind breakin' on the riddle :P :P
lol
chek out ma secret post ;D
-
okay pplzz......im off to bed....
cya l8r!!
gud nite..:D
-
yh...second riddle correct..am gettin betta by da sec
-
gudnyt zara...swd dreamzz
-
gudnit ;D
-
sweeteest angel r u goin 2 sleep???
-
hey peeps... am back :D
And thank god, u guyz r on :D
-
sweeteest angel r u goin 2 sleep???
hahahaha!! ur really funny!! do u keep on askin people if they gonna sleep!! hahahaha!! i cant stop laughing becuz u remind me of my little brother when its time for bed!!hahahahahahahahahaha!!
-
hey peeps... am back :D
And thank god, u guyz r on :D
ROXY!! GOOOOOOOD!! now join da game please!!
-
LOL... !!
Im sooo sorrry ...!!!
its just my stoooopid internet ...
so wots the game ?? :D
-
sweeteest angel r u goin 2 sleep???
at this rate of talkin' am stayin' awake till 4 ;D
i started wid chekin' da markscheme 'n ended up replyin' in chit-chat like its summer ;D ;D ;D
isnt dat da case for all :P
-
sweeteest angel r u goin 2 sleep???
hahahaha!! ur really funny!! do u keep on askin people if they gonna sleep!! hahahaha!! i cant stop laughing becuz u remind me of my little brother when its time for bed!!hahahahahahahahahaha!!
lol
-
haha!!yaaaa!! now i am done wid ur question been posting and solving it at da same time!!lol!! oh but i still got the last part lol!!
and roxy here try solvin this!!
I am an insect, and the first half of my name reveals another insect. Some famous musicians had a name similar to mine. What am I?
-
beetle?
sry i took it roxy :P i knw am annoyin' :P
so wats da answer for ma question moni?
-
right!! BEETLES!! hey ill pm it to u!!
-
Guyz do u have email addresses, cuz tht seems to be the only thing tht works for me ....
I dunno wots going on ..
and dont worry about it sweetest angel.. I was too busy refreshing this stupid page wanting to answer ...!!!!
-
Guyz do u have email addresses, cuz tht seems to be the only thing tht works for me ....
I dunno wots going on ..
and dont worry about it sweetest angel.. I was too busy refreshing this stupid page wanting to answer ...!!!!
hehe!!seems explorer is givin' u a hard time? ::)
download google chrome...bst ting for the internet so fst it'll piss u off :P
-
loool okay, where did every1 go ???
Mony ...?
-
has this topic stopped?? :( ... loved the jokes initially
-
has this topic stopped?? :( ... loved the jokes initially
theyre prob all sleeping and thinking about their next exam, dont bother them :P
-
i got chem to study, just the ORGANIC AND IM DONE!!!!!!!!
this is tiring :(
-
woow when do you guys sleeep!? :P
-
i got chem to study, just the ORGANIC AND IM DONE!!!!!!!!
this is tiring :(
i know its very annoying :( chem is one of my hardest subjects i cant seem to remember any equation :(
-
physics's equations are harder than chemistry. Chemistry's equations are easy :P
-
ooyyyeeee pplzzz......this topic is for jokes or riddles....no studies...
plz go n post all this in oder topics!!!!
-
hahaha alright :P ok here's a riddle. If your 555 then I'm...?
-
666....lollzzz
-
:( was it that easy!?
-
yup!!
its common...:P
-
huh ? :S
how do u get 666 lol
-
6 comes after 5 :P so 555 then 666
-
I thought u guys were better than this. Get better jokes and riddles.
-
ok here is a riddle:
If cat + dog = 7, and rat + mouse = 31, what does alligator + bird equal?
-
ok here is a riddle:
If cat + dog = 7, and rat + mouse = 31, what does alligator + bird equal?
zero ?
-
lol!! No!!
and hey for the match joke i won it!!lol!!
-
an eaten bird???
-
how do i change the name of this thread??! i want to name it Jokes and Riddles...
and if this riddle is difficult i can post an easier one!! and the answer is No!!
-
how do i change the name of this thread??! i want to name it Jokes and Riddles...
and if this riddle is difficult i can post an easier one!! and the answer is No!!
go to ur first post.. or the main description.. on the top-right corner.. there is "modify" edit ur sibject title and tadaa!
-
how do i change the name of this thread??! i want to name it Jokes and Riddles...
and if this riddle is difficult i can post an easier one!! and the answer is No!!
go to ur first post.. or the main description.. on the top-right corner.. there is "modify" edit ur sibject title and tadaa!
oh thx!! hey if u know any riddles or jokes post them here becuz i really liked that joke u posted lol! it was soo funny!!
-
how do i change the name of this thread??! i want to name it Jokes and Riddles...
and if this riddle is difficult i can post an easier one!! and the answer is No!!
go to ur first post.. or the main description.. on the top-right corner.. there is "modify" edit ur sibject title and tadaa!
[/quote
oh thx!! hey if u know any riddles or jokes post them here becuz i really liked that joke u posted lol! it was soo funny!!
lol k! although u still owe me +REP :P jkjk
-
ya +rep for!!
-
ok here is a riddle:
If cat + dog = 7, and rat + mouse = 31, what does alligator + bird equal?
44? :P
-
ok here is a riddle:
If cat + dog = 7, and rat + mouse = 31, what does alligator + bird equal?
44? :P
No!! :P
-
:(
-
the answer is 3
In each equation the numerical position in the alphabet of the first letter of each word is used. Thus alligator + bird is 1 + 2 (the "a" in alligator is the 1st letter of the alphabet and "b" in bird is the 2nd).
right ??
-
yea it's 3. :D
-
Q80boy IS THE WINNER PEOPLE!! +REP FOR U!!
AND did u google it??!! becuz if yes >:( >:( >:( and if no :D :D :D
-
What did he answer?! Anyway Group Hug for Q80BOY's right answer!
-
he answered the riddle in the last page!!
lol!! and GROUP HUG!!
wait ill get another riddle!!
-
A guy was borin in 1955. He is 33 years old now. How is that!? :P
-
hii ppl .. GROUP HUG too :-*
here's one
al 3ajooz byemshy 3ala eh?
-
@ zero:
didnt bother calculating, but im guessing he was born in a leap year ??
-
kan fi ghaiboba!!
-
hii ppl .. GROUP HUG too :-*
here's one
al 3ajooz byemshy 3ala eh?
hmmmm??!! 3ala wheel chair??
-
A guy was borin in 1955. He is 33 years old now. How is that!? :P
he was cloned in 1976
-
hii ppl .. GROUP HUG too :-*
here's one
al 3ajooz byemshy 3ala eh?
hmmmm??!! 3ala wheel chair??
no!!
3ala mehlo .. lol ;)
-
Lolll :P no he wasn't in a coma.
And no he wasn't cloned in 1976 :P
-
hii ppl .. GROUP HUG too :-*
here's one
al 3ajooz byemshy 3ala eh?
hmmmm??!! 3ala wheel chair??
no!!
3ala mehlo .. lol ;)
haha!! this is funny!!
-
Lolll :P no he wasn't in a coma.
And no he wasn't cloned in 1976 :P
born in a leap year ??
-
haha no :D
-
zero tell us ur answer i have another riddle....
-
take this ya monica ;)
no2ta soda 3ala al 7eita .. eh heya?
-
ohh wait its the name of the hospital!!
-
haha no :D
room number 1955 ??
-
It's the name of the hospital he was born in!
-
A guy was borin in 1955. He is 33 years old now. How is that!? :P
ya the name of the place!!
-
yea the name of the hospital :P
-
I WON PEOPLE!! :P :P :P
NOW +REP ME!! ;D ;D ;D
-
take this ya monica ;)
no2ta soda 3ala al 7eita .. eh heya?
khorom??
-
Can you name five days of the week without saying (or writing) Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday or Saturday? (Well, it should be an easy riddle :)
this is another one and thx for the +rep!!
-
take this ya monica ;)
no2ta soda 3ala al 7eita .. eh heya?
khorom??
no !!
sorsar madroob belshebsheb .. lol
tayeb no2tetein?
-
take this ya monica ;)
no2ta soda 3ala al 7eita .. eh heya?
khorom??
no !!
sorsar madroob belshebsheb .. lol
tayeb no2tetein?
hahaha!! el nokat di!!haha!!
umm n2tatian...sorsaran!!lol!!
-
The day before yesterday, yesterday, today, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow.
its a classic :P
-
take this ya monica ;)
no2ta soda 3ala al 7eita .. eh heya?
khorom??
no !!
sorsar madroob belshebsheb .. lol
tayeb no2tetein?
hahaha!! el nokat di!!haha!!
umm n2tatian...sorsaran!!lol!!
haha !!!
la2 ..
fisha :D
-
The day before yesterday, yesterday, today, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow.
its a classic :P
ukhh u googled it again!! >:( >:( >:(
lol!! someone +rep becuz i did b4!!
-
joke hea!!
From A Mother With Love
Dear Child,
I am writing this slow because I know that you can't read fast.
We don't live where we did when you left home.
Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home so we moved.
I won't be able to send you the address, as the last family that lived here took the house numbers when they left so that they wouldn't have to change their address.
This place is real nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure if it works too well though.
Last week I put a load in, pulled the chain, and haven't seen them since.
The weather isn't too bad here., it only rained twice last week, The first time it rained for three days and the second time for four days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Steve said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets. We got another bill from the funeral home.
They said if we don't make the last payment on Grandma's grave, up she comes. John locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were worried because it took him two hours to get me and Shelby out.
Your sister had a baby this morning but I haven't found out what it is yet, so I don't know if you're an aunt or an uncle. If the baby is a girl, your sister is going to name it after me, she's going to call it Mom.
Uncle Pete fell in a whiskey vat last week. Some man tried to pull him out but he fought them off and drowned. We had him cremated and he burned for three days.
Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Ralph was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your two friends were in the back. They drowned because they couldn't get the tailgate down.
There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened.
PS, I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already sealed.
-
The day before yesterday, yesterday, today, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow.
its a classic :P
ukhh u googled it again!! >:( >:( >:(
lol!! someone +rep becuz i did b4!!
lool no i didnt i swear, our english teacher told it to us 2 months ago :P
-
lol!! ok Q80!! ;D
haha zara liked the joke, a really stupid family!!
another riddle here:
How can you cut a cake into eight parts with just three cuts?
-
Can you name five days of the week without saying (or writing) Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday or Saturday? (Well, it should be an easy riddle :)
this is another one and thx for the +rep!!
yesterday, the day before yesterday, today, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow
-
lol!! ok Q80!! ;D
haha zara liked the joke, a really stupid family!!
another riddle here:
How can you cut a cake into eight parts with just three cuts?
vertically and horizontally, then thru the middle of the cake
-
cut the cake in half 3 times ??
-
this is the answer Cut it as you normally cut a cake, in half with one cut, and again with another, resulting in four pieces. Then cut it horizontally in half. This third cut creates eight pieces total.
omar is right i think!! those riddles r really easy...ill get u a very tough ones...
-
A man is six feet tall, is a clerk at a butcher shop, and wears size 11 shoes. What does he weigh?
-
meat ??
-
MEAT!!
-
meat......
oh god, u already posted it!
-
He weighs meat >:(
people!! ill search for tougher ones!!!!!!!!
ok +rep Q80boy!!
-
hello guys!! m back!
nd i dint have time to read all those pages so im here at the last page.....
happy 2 see you all so happy!!
was off studyin, y'all betr go study 2, cuz the chem xam is day after 2moro, nd if i go offline suddenly it means the battery in the laptop has run out :D :D
-
Thanks :)
ok heres one,
whats the word that starts with und and ends with und (used alot in london)
-
"and" (in british accent) ? :P
-
"and" (in british accent) ? :P
lol, nope
-
under pund :D
-
underground (metro) ?
-
underground (metro) ?
we have a winner !! ;D
ur prize:
a beach house in the Maldives, u can pick up the keys from the nearest real estate agent (terms and conditions apply)
thanks :)
-
YAY!
-
guys did you try the new Barbican!? :P 8)
-
nope,
how was it?
-
Its good! It's like the the normal barbican, but stronger. 8)
-
What can run but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a head but never weeps, has a bed but never sleeps?
-
River
-
correct... was it that easy... ill +rep u
-
this is a classic joke, i guess many of u alredi noe, but still am posting it->
John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how beautiful John's roommate Julie was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between John and his roommate, and this only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between John and the roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts,John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Julie and I are just roommates."
About a week later, Julie came to John and said, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I can't find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don't suppose she took it, do you?" John said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure." So he sat down and wrote, "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you 'did' take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you 'did not' take a gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."
Several days later, John received a letter from his mother which read, "Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Julie, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Julie. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom."
-
found the following on a site... duno if its true, but sure is kinda funny... ->
Some actual product warning labels:
On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink -
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT. (duh!)
On a New Zealand insect spray -
THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
In a US guide to setting up a new computer -
TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM
UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.
(Make sense...except these instructions we're IN THE BOX!)
In some countries (like W. Virginia:), on the bottom of Coke bottles -
OPEN OTHER END.
On a Sears hairdryer -
DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.
( Now THAT I'd like to see! )
On a bag of Fritos -
YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap -
DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.
(And that would be how?)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on BOTTOM of the box)
* DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
(oops...Too late! You lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)
On a Korean kitchen knife -
WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
(Dammit! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights -
FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.
(As opposed to what...use in outer space?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.
(I'm sure glad they cleared that up.)
On a Swedish chainsaw -
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.
(What kind of consumer phone-call led to this warning?)
On a child's superman costume -
WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.
That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)
-
loooool saiki, thats funny, but i dont think its true :-\
lmao @ the superman costume :P
-
actually i believe most of them, except the once about the chainsaw and the bag of nuts
about your riddle, it ain't easy, but it is far too common :P
+rep for the jokes
-
EVER WONDER...
...why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
...why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
..why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
...why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
...why doctors call what they do "practice"?
...why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows?
...why lemon juice is made with artificial flavour, while
dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
...why there isn't mouse-flavoured cat food?
...why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
...why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used
for the indestructible black box ?
...why they are called apartments when they are all stuck
together?
-
:P haha nice
-
duno about u guyz but i laughed my head off looking at this... (duno how to add a pic so giving the link)
http://jambalaugi.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/baby-techniques.jpg (http://jambalaugi.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/baby-techniques.jpg)
http://i29.tinypic.com/2en5547.jpg (http://i29.tinypic.com/2en5547.jpg)
-
haha, i really liked the joke u posted!! +rep for u... :) saiki
-
someone -repped me!!lol!! :(
-
i'll +rep you if you +rep me :P
-
i'll +rep you if you +rep me :P
haha wat is this?!?! ur not kind i wouldve +repped u anyway if u did that to me!!lol!! here +rep for u. :)
-
8) cool! haha :P did you finish studying?
-
no :( u??
and y do u keep ur tongue out all the time?? :P
-
It's fun 8) hahaha. what are you studying!?
-
It's fun 8) hahaha. what are you studying!?
accounting.....ukh its nice but i am bored....
what about u?
-
im chatting. I finished studying. By the way, you have to write a lot in acounting right?
-
im chatting. I finished studying. By the way, you have to write a lot in acounting right?
no not much...u have to write a lot in business...
this thread have many posts..woo everyday around 100 posts or sumthin..
-
well IG students are lame, we're always studying or online. We never go out only after we finish exams :P
-
i didnt go out since a month...ukh i am going after da business paper2 isa...becuz i dnt take bio...so ill have like 8 days gap till the chemistry and accounting exam!! :P :P :P
-
I wanna go watch a movie :(
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in the cinema?? i like visit th cinema 5 times per year lol!! only in summer cuz KSA have no cinemas....ive been downloading lotsss of movies in da computer to watch after the IG lol!!
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I download too, but it's not like watching a movie in the cinema. THE EFFECTSS!! :o have you watched Angels and Demons?
-
13 Days left =(
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noo is it horror?? i don't watch horror i get scared easily lol!! and i don't watch action, it takes my breath away!! and i don't watch musical movies, it makes me feel stupid...lol!!
-
13 Days left =(
oh heyyy!! ya 13 days!! for me its like only 4 days lol!!
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It's the second part of Davinci code. It's about history and finding out the truth. It's nice :D
-
It's the second part of Davinci code. It's about history and finding out the truth. It's nice :D
maybe ill check it oneday lol!! hey did u watch Twilight???
-
Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on.
It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal. “I’ll bet you $10 he’ll jump,” said the first guy. “Bet you $10 he won’t,” said the second guy. “Your on!”, he says.
Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge.
The second guy hands the first guy the money. “I can’t take your money,” said the first guy. “I cheated you. The same story was on the five o’clock news.”
“No, no. Take it,” said the second guy. “I saw the five o’clock news too. I just didn’t think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!”
-
are these really the Irish A-levels ??
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It's the second part of Davinci code. It's about history and finding out the truth. It's nice :D
maybe ill check it oneday lol!! hey did u watch Twilight???
Yea I even read the book.I think the book is better than the movie.
-
hahaha I wish our IGs were like that ;D
-
what da hell??!! is this real!!
-
i dunno !!
im asking u :-\
-
Three blonde women were stranded on an island. While trying to dig their way out, one of them came accross a buried lamp. Suddenly a genie appears and offers to grant each one of them one wish, in return for saving him.
The first blonde woman asks to be intelligent. Instantly, she is turned into brown haired woman and she swims off the island.
The second blonde woman asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one. She is instantly turned into a black haired woman. She then builds a boat and sails off the island.
The third blonde asks to become even more intelligent than the previous two. The genie turns her into a man, and he walks across the bridge.
-
i dunno !!
im asking u :-\
hmmm i dunt think so!!lol!! A-levels r really difficult so it cant be like this......
-
the email i got,
said that these were the Irish College Entry Exams
lol, imagine this WAS the A-levels, i wouldve moved to Ireland in hours :P
-
lol we'd get A's and 100's easily ;D
-
Junior asks his dad, “Daddy, how was I born?”
His dad sighs and replies, “Ah, my son, I guess one day you would have to find out anyway! Well, you see, your Mum and I first got together in a chat room on MSN. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your mom and we met at a cyber-cafe.
We snuck into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, but it was too late to hit the delete button.
Six weeks later your mom sent me an instant message saying that her operating system was showing signs of unauthorized program activity from a self extracting file which had implanted itself in her BIOS.
Then nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared and said:
“You’ve Got Male!”
-
Junior asks his dad, “Daddy, how was I born?”
His dad sighs and replies, “Ah, my son, I guess one day you would have to find out anyway! Well, you see, your Mum and I first got together in a chat room on MSN. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your mom and we met at a cyber-cafe.
We snuck into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, but it was too late to hit the delete button.
Six weeks later your mom sent me an instant message saying that her operating system was showing signs of unauthorized program activity from a self extracting file which had implanted itself in her BIOS.
Then nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared and said:
“You’ve Got Male!”
loooooooool
that's what bill gates will say to his son :P
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hahaha :P yea maybe
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gtg people!! byez!! ill sign in after an hour or 2 lol!!
BYEZ
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It's the second part of Davinci code. It's about history and finding out the truth. It's nice :D
maybe ill check it oneday lol!! hey did u watch Twilight???
Yea I even read the book.I think the book is better than the movie.
lol yeah .. am reading the book .. i watched the movie .. the book is damn good
i hav xamz but i cant resist it so i downloaded it on my mob :D :D
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I download too, but it's not like watching a movie in the cinema. THE EFFECTSS!! :o have you watched Angels and Demons?
its a good movie esp the last part its amazinnng, the guy fooled everyone !
-
It's the second part of Davinci code. It's about history and finding out the truth. It's nice :D
maybe ill check it oneday lol!! hey did u watch Twilight???
and twilight is one of my best movie lol :D
its amazing too
-
Of Dan Brown's novels, the best one has GOT to be Angels and Demons, haven't seen the movie though, is it good? and if it is, did aXXo and/or FXG crack it yet?
Since we're talking about the crime stuff, i read all of Dan Browns and alot of Agatha Christie (i dare any of you to finish her whole works), and a bit of Nora Roberts, can anyone gimme some recommendations?
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LOL >> check out my nick :D
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whats gud every1...any joke or riddle
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can any1 upload latest movies...i'll b bored after igcse's
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hey people!! ill look for riddles and post em here after a while....
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hey people!! ill look for riddles and post em here after a while....
cant wait :P lol
-
lets start easy :P
Why did the chicken cross the road?
-
To prove to the possum it could actually be done!
lol
there are many many answers for this question......do u know that this question got history!
-
lets start easy :P
Why did the chicken cross the road?
to get to the other side ?? :P
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i know, and u cant google my answer :P
my answer was, To run away from KFC :P
-
heres another joke,
blonde car accident
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
The blonde started laughing.
This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
This time the blonde laughed even harder.
Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
:P
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loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
that made my day, lmao !!
the question is why are blondes like that ?? :P
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loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
that made my day, lmao !!
the question is why are blondes like that ?? :P
haha i asked me teacher the same question a very long time age, she told me why but i cant remember, it goes wayyy back :P
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best jokes are blondies jokes!! HILARIOUS!!!
this one is good:
A girl came skipping home from school one day. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7, 8, 9, 10!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?"
"Yes, it's because you're blonde," her mother replied.
The next day, the girl came skipping home from school. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?"
"Yes, pumpkin, it's because you're blonde."
The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!"
And she lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of huge boobs.
"Very good," said her embarrassed mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, mommy?"
"No, it's because you're 25 hun!!!"
LMAO!!
-
omg maaaan
lmao
i laughed out loud, my sis is staring :P
-
lol...the jokes really funny...da blonde is sooooooo stupid
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lool!! k another one... let ur sis think ur a retard :P
A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game? The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vise versa."
Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep.
The lawyer, now agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500.00."
This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"
The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. "Okay, " says the lawyer, "your turn".
She asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?"
The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the blonde, and hands her $500.00.
The blonde says, "Thank you, " and turns back to get some more sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, "Well, what's the answer?"
Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.
-
lmaoooooooooooooooooooo hahahaha lool,
heres another one :P
The blondes and the Double Decker Bus
There's a double decker bus driving down the street full of passengers, blonde and brunette.
On the lower level of the bus, the brunettes are having a good time, talking, laughing, and singing along to the music playing.
On the upper part of the bus, the blondes are seated... they're in a panic. They're screaming, terrified, and holding onto each other as the bus moves along the street.
Finally, a brunette gets up and walks to the top of the bus to ask whats wrong, and one of the blonde's replies, "what's wrong?!? well, you'd be screaming too if you didnt have a driver!!!"
-
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
-
lmao
my sis actualy came to the screen and checked to see what was happening,
omg, i want to marry a blonde :P
-
the blonds r naive cuz they r beautiful and so they just care about their look.......so they dont get the time to be intelligent.
and this doesnt apply to all of them.....some of them r very clever, but they r hard to find, kinda ENDANGERED! LOL
-
i gtg now peeps cya later, have fun with this joke, ( they even made a website for blonde jokes lol, http://www.jokesblonde.com/)
The Perfect Christmas Tree
Two blondes decided that this Christmas they wanted to cut down their own Christmas tree. So they drove two hours into the country and walked deep into the woods to find the perfect Christmas tree. They had planned the trip well, especially considering that they were blond. They were dressed warmly with boots, warm coats and hats. They had a chain saw, hatchet, a bag to protect the tree and rope to drag it back to their car. Every detail was covered.
They searched and searched. They had gone to all this trouble, nothing but the prefect tree would do. They searched for hours through knee deep snow and biting wind. Finally, five hours later with the sun beginning to go down, one blonde says to the other, "I can't take this anymore. I give up! There are hundreds of beautiful trees out here. Let's just pick one whether it's decorated or not!"
-
cya l8r ABDO :P
lol
-
lmao
c u tommorow "7amany" :P
-
peace abdulrahman..
another joke..
A blonde went to eletronic store and she asked, "How is much is this TV?"
The salesman said, "Sorry, we don''t sell to blondes."
The next day she came back as a brunette. She asked the salesman how much the TV was. He said, "Sorry, we don''t sell to blondes."
The next day she came back as a red head and asked the salesman how much the TV was. He said, "Sorry we don''t sell to blondes."
She replied, " I came in here as a brunette and a red head. How do you know I am a blonde?"
"Because that is not a TV, it''s a microwave." AHAHAHAHA!!!!!
-
looooool
nice one ;)
-
haha tht ones funny
lol :D
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ok.. i feel sorry for blondies.. :P
imma say another joke.. NOT BLONDIE ONE! ;)
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.
The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead!!! What can I do?".
The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure if he's dead or no."
There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"
dammm!!! LOOL!!!
-
another one and im gone..
A guy dials his home number from work. A strange woman answers. The guy says, "Who is this?"
"This is the maid," answered the woman.
"We don't have a maid!"
"I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house."
"Well, this is her husband. Is she there?"
"Ummm...she's upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I just figured was her husband."
The guy is fuming. He says to the maid, "Listen, would you like to make $50,000?"
"What do I have to do?"
"I want you to get my gun from my desk in the den and shoot that witch and the jerk she's with."
The maid puts down the phone. The guy hears footsteps, followed by a couple of gunshots.
The maid comes back to the phone. "What should I do with the bodies?"
"Throw them in the swimming pool!"
"What pool?"
"Uh..... Is this 832-4821?"
HOLY SH*T I FEEL SORRY FOR THIS GUY!!! LMFAOO!!
Take care!
later,
AL*Eagle
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hey people!! lol!!
eagle ur jokes seems really funny!!lol!! i ll read them wait...
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omg that last one was a killer :P
-
i got a riddle
how quickly can u find what is so unusual about this paragraph?
it looks so ordinary that u would think that nothing is wrong with it at all, and, in fact, nothing is. But it is unusual. Why?
If u study it and think about it, you may find out, but i am not going to assist u in any way. U must do without couching. No doubt, if u work at it for long, it will dawn on u. Who knows? Go to work and try ur skill. Par is about half an hour.
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that was really funny + rep 4 eagle
-
ummm kam... where is the paragraph?
-
ok here is an easy riddle:
A woman is found hanging by her neck from the high ceiling in an otherwise empty locked room with a puddle of water under her feet. How did she kill herself?
-
ok here is an easy riddle:
A woman is found hanging by her neck from the high ceiling in an otherwise empty locked room with a puddle of water under her feet. How did she kill herself?
da puddle was ice
and the writing is the para
-
i gtg good night
;)
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lol!! Right!! +rep for u!! here is another one:
A man grabbed a woman's ring and pulled on it, then dropped it. How did this save her life?
-
People dont sleep!! i just came!!lol!! :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
-
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
-
lol!! Right!! +rep for u!! here is another one:
A man grabbed a woman's ring and pulled on it, then dropped it. How did this save her life?
hey iv herd this one b4
it ws a parachute pull ryt?
-
was it a kinda life saving ring
-
People dont sleep!! i just came!!lol!! :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
don't worry am here wit u
-
HAHA!! YAAAAAY!! GOOD U CAME!!!!!
and Reishamix IS THE WINNER!! +REP FOR U!!
-
oh k...ani more riddles
-
ya wait ill get more...
-
How many times can you subtract 5 from 25?
-
How many times can you subtract 5 from 25?
uhhh .. ok um guessin
once??
cus thn u gotta subtract fr 20 and so on ..
:S
plz temme um ryt
-
i av a joke...a man is fed up wit da world and plans to kill himself...he decides 2 do it by hanging himself....a friend walks into the mans room and sees him in the air with a rope round his waist.....his friend asks him wat he's doin n he replies"i want to commit suicide"....his friends bcams shocked n asks....y dont u put the rope round ur head?...he replies i tried dat n i almost died....
-
Reishamix!! UR AGAIN A WINNER!!LOL!!
NOW LIL STAR +REP HERE PLZ!!
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i av a joke...a man is fed up wit da world and plans to kill himself...he decides 2 do it by hanging himself....a friend walks into the mans room and sees him in the air with a rope round his waist.....his friend asks him wat he's doin n he replies"i want to commit suicide"....his friends bcams shocked n asks....y dont u put the rope round ur head?...he replies i tried dat n i almost died....
haha!! a stupid man!! haha!!
-
+rep 2 both of u
-
thx!!! +rep for u too.
hey another riddle:
What two things can never be eaten for breakfast?
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reishamix seems 2 b very gud @ da riddles...am jealous...lol....wats ur secret
-
lol ya!! where is she??
-
thx!!! +rep for u too.
hey another riddle:
What two things can never be eaten for breakfast?
DINNER AND LUNCH!
haha
thts a classic!
-
reishamix seems 2 b very gud @ da riddles...am jealous...lol....wats ur secret
i drank coffee ... =P
im hyyyppperrrrrrr!!!
-
oh my god reisha now how can we +rep u!!lol!! u won again!!
hey wait ill get tough ones!!
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oh my god reisha now how can we +rep u!!lol!! u won again!!
hey wait ill get tough ones!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
yes yes!!
erbodyz gnna love today lov today lov today !!
=P
-
but hey wait..tell me people from where r u and where do u live??!! lol!! i am always curious to know.... ;D
-
mikaness excreting eisha ..
-
really...
-
but hey wait..tell me people from where r u and where do u live??!! lol!! i am always curious to know.... ;D
im frm pakistan
but i liv in a village typ thing in saudi
=P
-
Ghana,Africa
-
oh nice ur a girl of course cuz i read ur posts abt the driving thing lol!!
ok i am Egyptian and i live in KSA in jeddah..
here another riddle:(its also easy)
It is everything to someone, and nothing to everyone else. What is it?
-
oh nice ur a girl of course cuz i read ur posts abt the driving thing lol!!
ok i am Egyptian and i live in KSA in jeddah..
here another riddle:(its also easy)
It is everything to someone, and nothing to everyone else. What is it?
uhhhhhhhh
ha!
um blank
uhh .. memories?
-
ummm.. mind??
-
r there many africans here
-
oh crpsanity IS THE WINNER!!LOL!!
+REP FOR U!! and here is another easy one..
While some months have just 30 days, others have 31 days. How many months have 28 days?
-
r there many africans here
hmmm i don't think so...wats the time in ur country by the way??
-
oh crpsanity IS THE WINNER!!LOL!!
+REP FOR U!! and here is another easy one..
While some months have just 30 days, others have 31 days. How many months have 28 days?
HAHA
every month!!
-
err.. everymonth..
-
alll
-
right!! lol!! THOSE R REALLY EASY!! now try +rep each other becuz i cant +rep any of u!!lol!!
-
r there many africans here
hmmm i don't think so...wats the time in ur country by the way??
9:11pm
-
ayt am doin da +rep
-
i cant +rep reisha
-
r there many africans here
hmmm i don't think so...wats the time in ur country by the way??
9:11pm
oh over here its 12:14
and here is another one:
What is broken every time it's spoken?
-
peace or silence?
-
HaVE asked this one already
-
ok this is a lil hard ..
who dares to do wht no other dares
who dz the 5150 LAX in tym
speed is life... life is speeding
to b just 5 of the world
but the world to 5 .. is more than just a story
hav bn herd of hav nevr bn licked
hav nevr fallen
but with hope and faith turn to Him at the end of the day??
i doubt ull knw .. :S
-
i wasnt around dat tym
-
is that supposed to be a thing??
-
i hav no idea...newayz gtg...gudnyt
-
is that supposed to be a thing??
um yea ..
its a famous "thing"
i doubt ud noe
only sm ppl knw these lines
-
ahahaha.. eisha .. IGEAR .. of course ..
-
ummm a computer?? lol!!
-
ahahaha.. eisha .. IGEAR .. of course ..
U WENT SUPPOSD TO TELL!!
WHT THIS MAN??
-
i hav no idea...newayz gtg...gudnyt
good night!!
-
hehe.. but its a lil unfair for evryone else man.. what this?
-
What stinks when living and smells good when dead?
-
scavengers? gosh lame! ahaha ..
-
What stinks when living and smells good when dead?
uhhh .. cow??
or a skunk??
dunno man
CRYPS!!
its not unfair!!
ppl wud noe if they wer into this stuff!!
its a ridl .. =P
-
nops!! wanna try again?? or u give up?
-
nops!! wanna try again?? or u give up?
uhh .... memories .. lol
i giv up!!
-
lol ok!! its a ::) Bacon.!!
lol!! do u have any to post??
-
lol ok!! its a ::) Bacon.!!
lol!! do u have any to post??
haha
iv nevr smells bacon ,,,
unfairr!!
-
pork??
-
One day astarmathsandphysics, being ambitious and bossy,decided to call all the members of studentforums.biz to a conference in london to discuss haw to kick thestudentroom.co.uk all over the internet.
S0 they all turned up at 42 Churchbury Road, London, all 4500 or so and squeezed into the living room. The members told him about all the bad things that been going on, the cheating and hacking, and pointing out the culprits. This mad astarmathsandphysics angry. He banned sir fixalot and rfi and panther.....who then starting pointing out alll the wrong things everyone else had done, the copyright violations - many bans resulting - and the ridiculuing of ex President Bush and Prime Minister Blair....
Finally and much much later, there were only 6 people left in the living room at 42 churchbury road.
And who are you, asked the boss?
We're the admin, they replied.
Ooh! Shifty looking group! replied astarmathsandphysics
-
hey... i got one too
its like ten n ten isnt twenty ....n wen u add fifty it becomes eleven wat could it b :)
-
@ astarmathsandphysics .. ahahahahahahaha ... lol
-
One day astarmathsandphysics, being ambitious and bossy,decided to call all the members of studentforums.biz to a conference in london to discuss haw to kick thestudentroom.co.uk all over the internet.
S0 they all turned up at 42 Churchbury Road, London, all 4500 or so and squeezed into the living room. The members told him about all the bead thing that been going on, the cheating and hacking, and pointing out the culprits. This mad astarmathsandphysics angry. He banned sir fixalot and rfi and panther.....who then starting pointing out alll the wrong things everyone else had done, the copyright violations - many bans resulting - and the ridicluing of ex President Bush and Prime Minister Blair....
Finally and much much later, there were only 6 people left in the living room at 42 churchbury road.
And who are you, asked the boss?
We're the admin, they replied.
Ooh! Shifty looking group! replied astarmathsandphysics
hahahahahaha!! wat a nice story!! haha!! poor rfi and panther they always get banned!! and i think Sir Fixalot became famous!! haha!!
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hey... i got one too
its like ten n ten isnt twenty ....n wen u add fifty it becomes eleven wat could it b :)
hmmm -39?? lol!!
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lol n wats this -39 supposed to b :P .... c'mon think its very very common thing everyone knows abt it!!
-
hmmmm ok give hints...
-
i already did ... everyone knws abt it.... i bet its present everywhere i mean at least every1s got one
-
lol ok i suck at this sooo i give up!! lol!!
now say the answer!! ;D
-
10:10!! Oh MY GOSh!! TIMEEE!! LOLLL THIS IS GOOD
-
CORRECT!! u got it cryp :)
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ahaha.. u know.. when i first read it like an hour back i tried my calculator.. then was like gosh forget it chemistry.. then i jsut chekd it rht now n u said evryones got it.. lol just hit me.. =]
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lol!! so people wats up???!!!
i am bored!!lol!! doing accounting and chemistry.......ukh
-
lol!! so people wats up???!!!
i am bored!!lol!! doing accounting and chemistry.......ukh
haha
um youtubing ... =P
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oh u upload videos??!! on youtube cool!!
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oh u upload videos??!! on youtube cool!!
looooooooool
no man ..
i dnt hav tym man ...
-
um trying to study the same page for the past hour.. yeah thats up with me..
@ monica and dang it.. you take accounting???? shucks man.. hehe.. i dropped all commerce! yayyss!
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i take half sciences and half commerce lol!! anyway guyz, i gtg now!! it was really nice talkin to u!! plz join the thread tom!!byeeee!! :-* :-* :-*
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hehe bye.. Assalamualaikum!
-
wa alikom alsalam!! dont forget to pray isha!!
and this thread today only increased by 200 posts wow!! so 200 post per day!! lol!! cool!!
good night!! :-*
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hehe.. bye.. and i try praying isha on time .. lolz ..
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gudmornin 2 yall ope yall gud
-
morning .... :D
-
how waz ur nyt roxy
-
hey people!! its me MONICA , i changed my nickname!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :o :o :o
-
MONYYYYY !!!!
Why did u do tht ?
change i tback.. u cant be Sherry ..:P
Okay... fine Ill +rep u if u do :P#
And yeah my nyt was gooood....:D
-
damn this thread is growing so rapidly!
and hello there Sherry and everyone else! who else is online AND studying chemistry?
-
=O
-
lol. yh... have u guyz finished chem ?
-
people keep askin me about my nickname like hell :( and they keep on sayin r u a muslim :( i had to change it after i became famous wid it :'( :'( :'( :'( WHAT SHALL I DO NOW!!! :'( :'( :'( :'(
-
damn this thread is growing so rapidly!
and hello there Sherry and everyone else! who else is online AND studying chemistry?
i am
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change it backkkkkk....... :D
Ill +repp u if u do :P :P :P
okay guyz Im off now.. need 2 get back 2 chem ....!!
Toodles..:D
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people do u recognize me?? :o :o :o
i think i should make a NEW THREAD TO show people i am Monica!!lol!!
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i am studyin accounting...wats on sherry/monica
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lollll...!
rnt u plannin 2 change it bak then ?
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ill make a poll!! lol! ;D
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hey someone -repped me!!lol!!
how do i make a poll?
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hello there sabiq, you studying or past-paper-ing?
and sweetsh, u MIGHT wanna follow Mony/Sherry's path :P
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lol!! ya where r u Sweetsh?!?!
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I'm here sweety =)
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so do i change it back to Monica?? :(
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hey someone -repped me!!lol!!
how do i make a poll?
Click The blue add poll buttom at bottom right of page
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oh ya thanks astar!!! ;D
so what do u think of my nick?? do i change it back???? :-\
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It's your nickname and your choice, do whatever you want.
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lol!! ok....
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Night has ended for another day,
morning has come in a special way.
May U smile lik the sunny rays and leaves your worries at the blue blue bay.
GOOD MORNING GUYS!!
By the way monica is betta...;D
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GOOD MORNING!! :D
ya ok ill consider that!!
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And why Sherry? Try something else.
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well actually in real life i only have 2 nicknames: Shushou
Sherry
so shoshou is already taken....and u know my name u can suggest any if u have!! :D
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Clearly someone (starts with S and ends with H) has problems with real names :P
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Shougy ? =P
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hahaha, oh my god!! haha, its like a name of a dog!!haha!!
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haha 7araam =(
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k i dunno if it's true but
The following questions and answers were collected from last year's GCSE exams, and are some of the answers given by British students writing their fifth form GCSE Exams last year. These are genuine responses from 16 year olds.
Geography
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutant like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: What is a planet?
A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
Sociology
Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.
Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Biology
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow. [He got an A]
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorised? (e.g.abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.
Q: What is the Fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.
Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section."
A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.
Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.
Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport
Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas.
English
Q: Use the word "judicious" in a sentence to show you understand its meaning
A: Hands that judicious can be soft as your face. {do dishes}
Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Technology
Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab or Seikh wears on his head.
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seriously??!!! they answered like that...wow!!lol!!
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thank you nid for giving us extra hopes for our results; lets just hope that the entire world (except us in here) is at the same level
+rep for u
and that first question, OMG!
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funny responses! just liked it and laughed!
+rep!!
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i wish the curve is low this year and hi people i am new here and this is my first post
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Welcome!
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thank you
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:P you guys cant stop posting here. I had above 100 emails :(
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hey WELCOME NANO!! and Q80boy NO my name is not Shahed and dont try guessing it becuz its difficult!!lol!!
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Try shushu but in a diff spelling
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or..Cherry 8)
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lol!! i tried Cherry but it was taken..... and shushu ummmmm wait ill try it...
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haha!! it worked!! let me edit the poll!! lol!!
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anyone watches One Tree Hill!? :P
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i do...sometimes :-\
i watch gilmore girls!!
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shoshou is a nice nickname, what is your nationality?
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i am Egyptian. u?
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American answers are the stupidest of all. I will fine some.
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LOL really!! thats good....the more the answers r stupid the more the curve will be low!!lol!!
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All do your bit to keep it low and give one moronic answer to a question on each paper
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haha, if i do bit to keep it low, ill be the only one ending up wid a C becuz no one will do there bit in IGCSE!! lol!! and the problem is that in my batch this years many A* students(most r Egyptians, who eat the books)...they r surely gona make the curve explode!!lol!! and the curve depends on the city ur in.... :(
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sup every1??
ill take a guess off ur real name shoshou... Shayma? or shatha? or shams??
wierd names.. but one of them since ur an arab?? :P
dammn i have accounting tomorrow! wish me luck ppl!! Ill need it
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no eagle!!lol!! ur wrong!!
and ya good luck...i have both accounting and chemistry :(
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sherrien? :-\
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wrong :P
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:(
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:(
blahahahahahaha!! dnt try u will lose anyway!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
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5allas. Shay6an :P
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5allas. Shay6an :P
me??!! :o i am an angel!! :-[
i wish that i slap u!! >:(
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OH MY GOD OMAR!! :o :o :o :o PLEASE REMOVE UR POST!! U WON DUDE!! BUT REMOVE IT!!
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ALL HAIL THE SUPER-MIGHTY O.T.13! 8)
Ok i'll remove it if you tell me sweetsh's name *evil laugh*
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What da hell?? no i wont tell u sweetsh name!!
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COOOOOL 8)
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A5 it was worth a try!
ok fine, i got new terms: just tell me which of them is the correct one
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:P ok try guessing my name! 8)
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gimme a hint and i'll start off
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thx Omar!! weird u know these names ur turkish pakistani?? right?
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no i am a Sudani, but i just love studying other cultures
(p.s. i spell my name omEr)
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Ends with "R" I can't tell you whats my first letter. It would be easy then. :P
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TAMER?? 3amer? 3amar?
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I hate it when ppl say omAr. They should say OmEr. 8)
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TAMER?? 3amer? 3amar?
lol, no :P
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I hate it when ppl say omAr. They should say OmEr. 8)
WHATEVER!! ::) ::) ::)
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I hate it when ppl say omAr. They should say OmEr. 8)
EXACTLY!
+rep for you for having common sense!
wait a minute, you end with R and u have enough sense to spell Omer correctly, we got the same name don't we?
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OMER??
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yea 8)
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well omer and omer!! nice meetin u ::)
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from now on ama call you namesake (if you don't mind) ;D
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hey omer r u sure ur a sudani?? cuz i saw ur pic and u dont look sudani?? :-\
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My classmate is sudani, and he's white.
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ok, heres a thing about Sudanese
we are the most diverse country in the middle east (i find it really shocking the country is still one country lol), you find all types of people, some look a bit like Indians (like me i guess, but thats also cause i got an indian set of maternal grea-great-grandparents), others are white and others are black. Our looks (actually most eastern africans) don't tell you our nationalities, you have to trace you linneage
(i hope you were talking to me and not the other omer)
u know what, just call me OT, or O.T.13. and we'll call Omer Omer
so zero where r u from?
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hello everybody .. check me out should be studying .. but anyhows just wanted to tell monica/shousho .. i though ur name was really monica!
my friends called tht! sighs anyways .. why doesnt anyone evr put on their real names =( .. ? sighs anyhows.. i like monica better! lol .. =]
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@ Omer.. my bestmates sudanese .. =] n i know how diverse they are .. lol she has indian and afghani background .. hehe
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oh heyyyyy crypanity!! lol, u thought my name is monica....i will change it when i see the total numbers of votes!!lol!
and ya OT i was speakin to u..lol thx for the information... and Sudanese r our neighbors (Egyptians) lol!!
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@ Omer.. my bestmates sudanese .. =] n i know how diverse they are .. lol she has indian and afghani background .. hehe
No kidding!? I was gonna mention that, but yea, i do have some afghani blood ( i didn't mention that cause i look nuthing like them lol).
And you ain't the only one who over here while he ain't supposed to; i got FREAKING CHEMISTRY tomorrow, and i am so naive i am actually studying and chit-chatting simultaneously
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oh heyyyyy crypanity!! lol, u thought my name is monica....i will change it when i see the total numbers of votes!!lol!
and ya OT i was speakin to u..lol thx for the information... and Sudanese r our neighbors (Egyptians) lol!!
lol, yea i hear that a lot :P
and for me i only use the nickname just in case i come over a namesake (By the way, Omer, where have u gone? lol) , so i call myself Omertios cause my name is a part of it AND not many people think of it as a nickname
and cryps while you're here, lets start guessing ur name, give us a hint
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I'm from Iraq ( kurdish) :D
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wts with the shoshou name lol
i thought its a nickname for "Rasha" and thats not ur name :P
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I dont have problem telling my name .. lol but as u wanna guess it .. okayyy..
i guess ts common .. hmmmmmmm .. the second word of my nick is the first word of my name.. and the sixth word
is the third .. hehe.. now find it out ..
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ok wait crypanity, ur a girl right??!! and ya where do u come from??
and Sanity..lol!! of course its not Rasha...and i first named it sherry and then SOME people pm me and though its not cool!!lol!! so i changed it to shoshou and both r my nicknames at the end...
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I dont have problem telling my name .. lol but as u wanna guess it .. okayyy..
i guess ts common .. hmmmmmmm .. the second word of my nick is the first word of my name.. and the sixth word
is the third .. hehe.. now find it out ..
sixth? i can only make out 2 words: cryps and sanity, oh waaaait! these are initials? as in each letter stands for a word?
???
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so its ra... right?
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ok i'm still confused, unless you meant letters and not words
so, s'posing kam's right, ill go ahead and give three guesses
Rana?
Rania?
Rabia?
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ahahaha .. lol .. okay .. i meant letters .. dang .. anyhow ill make life easier .. r_ _ a _
thats what i meant ..lol
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rabab?
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rawan?? rolaa?? rozaa??
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hehe.. no! lol .. ummm .. okay .. will make it more easier.. will give u all the vowels.. r e _ a _
gosh.. hehe.. this is like telling it now yaknow..
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reham
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REHAM!! :P REHAB!
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??? ??? ??? ???
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REHAM!! :P REHAB!
Rehab? that just doesn't sound right lol
You know wut ama change my nickname too :P
O.T.13. is the new name!
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the maths teacher who teachs Highschool inour school is called Rehab :P
omer...we are cool 8)
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You Go it Omer! It is Reham .. Lol ...
and yeah please .. that Rehab joke is old.. lol
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the maths teacher who teachs Highschool inour school is called Rehab :P
omer...we are cool 8)
WORDDD 8)
Rehab....hmmm..... i got friend whose surname is Ehab, we call him Rehab when we wanna annoy him lol
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sumbuddy hasta crack a joke now .. i'm depressed :'(
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hahaha :P
By the way reham where are you from?
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ok, a joke, most of the good ones were already given, but ill throw in a riddle
What does the Crown Princes of Norway and a tennis ball have in common?
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both look like a sphere? :P
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nopes lol
tell me when you give up
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I gave up long ago lol
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well.. i am originally a Bengali .. but.. indeed I live in the mid of nowhere .. in a non existing kind a place in KSA .. nice eh?
p.s dont get me wrong.. i love this place.. ts my home.. ahahahahahahahaa ..
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they both have this white strip on them LOLzz
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and WRONG snitty!
ok, fine
one is "Thrown to the air"
and the other is an "Heir to the Throne"
(p.s. i HATE THIS PLACE thats called Riyadh :P)
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hahahaha I dunno why am I laughing :P it's not that funny, but i guess im laughing from boredom XD
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i know, couldn't think of any other joke/riddle
anyways, i already feel bad enough for wasting so much time with with chemistry economics and biology coming one after the other, so ama leave now, see y'all next week probably!
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yo everyone listen up..
Iv got this joke that would crack u up to bitzzz!!
Little Margaret was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class.
One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, Margaret, who created the universe?"
When Margaret didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.
"God Almighty!" shouted Margaret and the Nun said "Very good" and Margaret fell back asleep.
A while later the Nun asked Margaret, "Who is our Lord and Savior?" But, Margaret didn't even stir from her slumber.
0nce again, little Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.
"Jesus Christ!" shouted Margaret and the Nun said "Very Good" and Margaret fell back asleep.
Then the Nun asked Margaret a third question.
"What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?"
Again Johnny came to the rescue.
This time Margaret jumped up and shouted, "If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!"
The Nun fainted.
ROFL!! LMAO!! LOOLL!!!
ahahahaHAHAHAHA!!
I can't stop laughing
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ppeace bro. Good luck in your exams ;)
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I dream of a better world tommorow.
Where the chickens can cross the road, without their motives being questioned.
( =] .. k um off studyin Ya Allah .. bye Take care all ..)
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another one.. see the previous page last post for the best 1 so far
anyways here is the 2nd 1..
Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question.
"Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?"
"None." replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher. "But I like the way you are thinking."
Little Johnny said, "I have a question for you now. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one licking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one sucking her cone, which one is married?"
"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone?"
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger. But I like the way you are thinking."
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i g2g to finish solving the past papers the chem ones.......:'(
cya l8r peeps
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ppeace bro. Good luck in your exams ;)
thank you namesake, ill need that
Good luck to you too :)
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another one.. see the previous page last post for the best 1 so far
anyways here is the 2nd 1..
Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question.
"Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?"
"None." replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher. "But I like the way you are thinking."
Little Johnny said, "I have a question for you now. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one licking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one sucking her cone, which one is married?"
"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone?"
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger. But I like the way you are thinking."
loooooooooooooooooool
the teacher has a "clean" mind :P
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lol both jokes are very hilarious
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Hey People!! THE EXAM IS TOM!! lol!! good luck everyone for chemistry and accounting, i take both so good luck for me too :'(
lol!! Dont forget to pray isha and say as much dua as u can!! INSHALLAH WE WILL ALL DO GOOD!!
GOOOOOOOOD NIGHT!! :-* :-* :-*
ALLAH HOMA ANTA RABI, LA ILAH ILA ANT, KHALAKTANI WE ANA 3ABDOOK WE ANA 3ALA 3AHDEK WA WA3DEK ME ESTAT3ET A3OZO BEK MEN SHAR MA SANA3T ABO2 LEK BI NA3MATIKA 3ALI WE 2BO LEK BI ZANBI ,F2GHFER LI FA2NHO LA YAGHFOR AL ZANOOB EL ANT!!
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Hey People!! THE EXAM IS TOM!! lol!! good luck everyone for chemistry and accounting, i take both so good luck for me too :'(
lol!! Dont forget to pray isha and say as much dua as u can!! INSHALLAH WE WILL ALL DO GOOD!!
GOOOOOOOOD NIGHT!! :-* :-* :-*
ALLAH HOMA ANTA RABI, LA ILAH ILA ANT, KHALAKTANI WE ANA 3ABDOOK WE ANA 3ALA 3AHDEK WA WA3DEK ME ESTAT3ET A3OZO BEK MEN SHAR MA SANA3T ABO2 LEK BI NA3MATIKA 3ALI WE 2BO LEK BI ZANBI ,F2GHFER LI FA2NHO LA YAGHFOR AL ZANOOB EL ANT!!
Thanks......and u got +rep 3ala el kalam el 7elw dah ;)
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UR WELCOME!! +rep for u too!! :-*
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UR WELCOME!! +rep for u too!! :-*
:$.......*blush*
gd luck bokra.....may God help us all! ;)
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esp.me snitty... :'(
u ready for the funeral rite? :'(
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esp.me snitty... :'(
u ready for the funeral rite? :'(
inshallah there wont be one......;)
do ur best, and inshallah we will all do the best!!
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paper 3 is disaster :(
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yea Omer, it really was a killer (for me at least), and wussup with the bio questions, anyways, the only thing that made me calm down is how low the boundries will probably be cuz everyone i asked (even some of the nerds) found this paper challenging, thank god i don't take economics instead of accounting, at least i have until tomorrow to study for it
but seriously, if all the poaper 3s r like that, then i'm as good asa slaughtered sheep (5aroof al 3eid :P)
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lol... tell me about it ::)
umm... the curve shud be low cuz every1 was saying it was hard...
anywayz ... discussions about exams 24 hours later .... ;D
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oh right, but then its pointless, cuz we gonna be too worried about Eco!
oh well, as far as i'm concerned, all i have to worry about now is physics paper 3
paper one... blah blah.... eco, a subject of thinking, ie its the only subject (that, english and computers) that i almost always beat the nerds, so inshallah no worries, and oh well thats it, so i took the liberty of strting the summer planning, starting with a party on 12 june (why did they make the exam just before juma'ah? just so we can't go crazy without the hay2a catching us?) in which i will finally get the chance to swing by the SAT boys and give em a taste of their own medicine XD
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lol. okay I think we're all waiting for Mony/ Shoushou....to liven the place up....:P
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ya,
this thread is nothing without monica :P
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i knowww.. lol.. !!
and Im sitting here waiting for her :P
Cus miraculously my IE is working today ...pheww...!!! :D
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when does accounting end? cuz i think this is wuts holding her
@roxy: lol, and today i finally got my broadband connection reactivated
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haha..lol
this topic is abt jokes guys
posts some jokes and make the place lively..
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51 days
A bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door bursts open and in come four
exuberant blondes. They come up to the bar, order five bottles of champagne and ten glasses, take their order over and sit down at a large table.
The corks are popped, the glasses are filled and they begin toasting and chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
Soon, three more blondes arrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
Two more blondes show up and soon their voices are joined in raising the roof. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
Finally, the tenth blonde comes in with a picture under her arm. She walks over to the table, sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts. Up jumps the others, they begin dancing around the table, exchanging high-five's, all the while chanting "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
The bartender can't contain his curiosity any longer, so he walks over to the table. There in the centre is a beautifully framed child's puzzle of the Cookie Monster. When the frenzy dies down a little bit, the bartender asks one of the blondes, "What's all the chanting and celebration about?"
The blonde who brought in the picture pipes in, "Everyone thinks that blondes are dumb and they make fun of us. So, we decided to set the record straight. Ten of us got together, bought that puzzle and put it together.
The side of the box said 2-4 years, but we put it together in 51 days!"
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Dear Ricky
A Marine stationed in Afghanistan recently received a letter from his girlfriend back home. It read as follows:
Dear Ricky,
I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since you've been gone, and it's not fair to either of us. I'm sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you.
Love, Becky
The Marine, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow Marines for any snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex-girlfriends, aunts, cousins etc. In addition to the picture of Becky, Ricky included all the other pictures of the pretty girls he had collected from his buddies.
There were 57 photos in that envelope....along with this note:
Dear Becky,
I'm so sorry, but I can't quite remember who you are. Please take your picture from the pile, and send the rest back to me.
Take Care, Ricky
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA....
good one :P
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second one is HILARIOUS
and if you got more, keep 'em coming
+rep
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I'm Blonde, I'm Beautiful, I'm Going To New York...
On a plane bound for New York the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested she move to economy since she didn?t have a first class ticket.
The blonde replied, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to New York and I'm not moving."
Not wanting to argue with a customer the flight attendant asked the co-pilot to speak to her.
He went to talk with the woman asking her to please move out of the first class section.
Again, the blonde replied, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to New York and I'm not moving.
The co-pilot returned to the cockpit and asked the captain what he should do. The captain said,
"I'm married to a blonde, and I know how to handle this."
He went to the first class section and whispered in the blonde's ear. She immediately jumped up and ran to the economy section mumbling to herself, "Why didn't anyone just say so?"
Surprised, the flight attendant and the co-pilot asked the captain what he said to her. The captain replied: "I told her the first class section wasn't going to New York."
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Job Application
This is an actual job application that a 17 year old boy submitted to McDonald's in Florida... and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!
NAME: Greg Bulmash.
SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY: Less than I'm worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.
DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.
SIGN HERE: Aries.
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people with "clean" minds wont understand this one :P
Boiled egg!
Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water?
A: It may take a while for me to get hard, I just got laid yesterday.
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Directory Enquiries
The following are real conversations Directory Enquiries operators had with callers, as revealed in interviews with staff at the Cardiff DE Centre.
Caller: I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff, please.
Operator: I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?
Caller: Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the B fell off.
Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator: Woven? Are you sure?
Caller: Yes. That"s what it says on the label - Woven in Scotland.
Caller: I'd like the RSPCA please.
Operator: Where are you calling from?
Caller: The living room.
Caller: The water board please.
Operator: Which department?
Caller: Tap water.
Operator: How are you spelling that?
Caller: With letters.
Caller: I'd like the number for a reverend in Cardiff, please.
Operator: Do you have his name?
Caller: No, but he has a dog named Ben.
Caller: The Union of Shopkeepers and Alligators please.
Operator: You mean the Amalgamated Union of Shopkeepers?
On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told the worried operator: I haven't got a pen so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on!
-
ok, here comes a riddle:
I come in darkness, but fill the mind with light. I bring enlightenment to some, while gripping others in the hand of fear. With me it can be a journey of inexplicable joy and sorrow. What I will show you will often be unreachable. Journey with me and what you see may haunt you. Journey with me and you may never want to return home. Journey with me and you will never know when it will end. What am I?
-
your dreams !! ;D
-
was it really that easy?!
-
i got it by email :P
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HEY PEOPLE!!!!!! well i read ur posts and thx for missing me becuz i missed u more :'( :-* :-* :-*
Well i came from 45 min but my friends were on the phone askin about the paper..lol 4 calls imagaine since i entered from the door!!
Chemistry paper was not that easy i know, BUT i have a very good news for u!!!! A friend and a teacher told me that in the history of chemistry the highest grade in chemistry paper 3 is 58/80 SO IMAGINE 22 MARKS LOST AND U STILL GET AN A!!coool!!
Accounting was fine i did everything right alhamdolilah :D well but the theory part was a bit difficult though :-\
Anyway...i was sittin wid angel and my best friend we were the only people left in school lol!! we had a great converstaion and lots of fun!!
GROUP HUG PEOPLE!! AND ROXY HOPE U COME ONLINE!! :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
Wrong E-mail Address!
Lesson to be learned from typing the wrong email address:
A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter.
They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.
Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel plans.
So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.
The husband checked into the hotel.
There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife.
However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.
Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral.
He was a minister who was called home to glory following a heart attack.
The widow decided to check her email expecting messages from relatives and friends.
After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted.
The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor,
and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My loving wife
Subject: I've arrived Date: May 9th, 2005
I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here
now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones.
I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then.
Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. sure is freaking hot down here!!!!!
-
welcome back shoushou !!
glad ur accounting was easy !! :)
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Wrong E-mail Address!
Lesson to be learned from typing the wrong email address:
A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter.
They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.
Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel plans.
So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.
The husband checked into the hotel.
There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife.
However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.
Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral.
He was a minister who was called home to glory following a heart attack.
The widow decided to check her email expecting messages from relatives and friends.
After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted.
The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor,
and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My loving wife
Subject: I've arrived Date: May 9th, 2005
I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here
now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones.
I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then.
Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. sure is freaking hot down here!!!!!
hahaha nice! ;)
-
welcome back shoushou !!
glad ur accounting was easy !! :)
thx mate!! and hey i said in the history of chemistry the highest was 58/80, while last year it was 45/80!! wow!! cant believe it!
-
*cough* someone not getting a good mark in chemistry *cough*
-
ya everyone said it was difficult...so then dont worry curve is gonna be low inshallah ;)
-
*cough* no one is *cough* :P
here, read this joke and freshen up, :)
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her.
We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits.
She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all.
She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."
We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.
I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"
I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.... but at least she knows I'm smarter than her.
Alright girls. Comment on if you agree. Hell even if you disagree, comment :P
Men, comment on this because you have balls !!
(By the way is it over-rated ??)
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ya everyone said it was difficult...so then dont worry curve is gonna be low inshallah ;)
i hope so :/ i did really bad in p6, but did ok in p3, inshallah p1 is really easy
and look at the bright side, we finished the hardest exam left :P well for me lol
-
hahaha :P
and no over rated = good + funny :D we are all 15+ ^_^
-
hahaha :P
and no over rated = good + funny :D we are all 15+ ^_^
good, cause i dont want any parents filing lawsuits against me for contaminating ur "clean" minds :P
jk ;)
-
never judge a person according to what he owns or how he looks!or what he does!
personally, I always judge a person according to his personality!nothing else ;D
-
Cavan Divorce
A man in Cavan calls his son in London a couple of days before
Christmas Eve and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that
Your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough".
"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams.
"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer", the father says.
"We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you
call your sister in Leeds and tell her".
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like
Hell they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this".
She calls Cavan immediately, and screams at her father, "You are NOT
getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm
calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow . Until
then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?", and hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay", he
says, "they're coming for Christmas - and they're paying their own
way..."
-
mmmmm i think men only think of themselves...women have no choice at the end.... :( and for me i am ready to marry the son of the gardener if i really love him!!lol!! just kidden... :P
-
If you ever get pulled over for speeding!
A police officer pulls a bloke over for speeding and has the following exchange:
Officer: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended for speeding.
Officer: May I see the registration for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the registration in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes mate. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the boot.
Officer: There's a BODY in the BOOT?!?!?
Driver: Yes, mate.
Hearing this, the officer immediately called his back up. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the inspector approached the driver to handle the tense situation:
Inspector: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here it is.
It was valid.
Captain: Who's car is this?
Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration papers.
Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.
Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
Captain: Would you mind opening your boot? I was told you said there's a body in it.
Driver: No problem.
Boot is opened; no body.
Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glove box, and that there was a dead body in the boot.
Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying bastard told you I was speeding, as well.
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Nice, funny,entertaining stories!! just wondering from where r u getting these ???
-
Nice, funny,entertaining stories!! just wondering from where r u getting these ???
http://www.funny-haha.co.uk
enjoy :)
(for one hour only, then continue studies !! :P)
-
A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, “If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes.”
The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, “Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes. Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!”
The woman said, “That’s okay.” For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, “You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis to whom women will flock.” The woman replied, “That’s okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me.”
So, KAZAM-she’s the most beautiful Woman in the world!
For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, “That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you.” The woman said, “That’s okay, because what’s mine is his and what’s his is mine.”
So, KAZAM-she’s the richest woman in the world!
The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, “I’d like a mild heart attack.”
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don’t mess with them.
Attention female readers : This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good.
Male readers, continue reading….
…
…
…
…
…
…
The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife
Moral of the story: Women think they’re so smart. Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show.
PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen
-
http://www.funny-haha.co.uk
enjoy :)
(for one hour only, then continue studies !! :P)
Inshallah dont worry :D
-
LMAO!!! + REP abdulrahamn and q80boy!!
damn that was funy :D!!
although my jokes are better :P jk
aight im gonna give u a killer one.. just before I say it..
the word "Penis" is not a swear word, I took it in Bio class.. so dont report me. -Rep me nor Ban me k?
here it goes:
A man is lying in bed in the hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young nurse appears to sponge his hands and feet.
"Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "Are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, I'm only here to wash your hands and feet".
He struggles again to ask, "Nurse, are my testicles black?" Finally, she pulls back the covers, raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in her other hand and takes a close look, and says "There is nothing wrong with them!"
Finally, the man pulls off his oxygen mask and replies, "That was very nice but, are... my... test... results... back?
ROFL!!!
-
hehe :P
School days are over!
A young female teacher was giving an assignment to her 6th grade class. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard.
Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the boys in the class. She quickly turned and asked, “What‘s so funny Bobby?“
“Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters.“
“Get out of my classroom,“ she yells, “I don‘t want to see you for three days!“
The teacher turns back to the chalkboard. Realizing she had forgotten to title the assignment; she reaches to the very top of the chalkboard. Suddenly there is an even louder giggle from another male student.
She quickly turns and asks, “What‘s so funny Billy?“
“Well teacher, I just saw BOTH of your garters.“ Again she yells, “Get out of my classroom!“ This time the punishment is more severe, and tells him - “I don‘t want to see you for three weeks!“ Embarrassed and frustrated, she drops the eraser when she turns around again.
So she bends over to pick it up. This time there is a burst of laughter from another male student. She quickly turns to see Little Johnny leaving the classroom.
“And where do you think you are going?“ she asks.
“Well teach, from what I just saw, my school days are over!“
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LMAO i just read the most funniest joke everrr lol, its kinda dirty but its funnny XDDD unfortunatly i cant post it here :(
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hehehe see this website! it has plenty of good jokes
http://www.activejokes.com/cat.php?cn=HOT
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A man had just been laid off from work. He was standing on the railing of a high bridge getting read to jump off, when he happened to look down and see a little man with no arms dancing all around on the river bank below.
He thought to himself, "Life isn't so bad after all," and got off the railing.
He then walked down to the river bank to thank the little man for saving his life.
"Thank you," he said. "I was going to jump off that bridge and kill myself, but when I saw you dancing even though you have no arms, I changed my mind."
"Dancing? I'm not dancing!" the armless man replied bitterly... "My back itches, and I can't scratch it!"
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Embarrassing situations!
A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the
bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Erm, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"
She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!"
Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table. After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a university student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations."
To which he responds, at the top of his lungs "What do you mean, 200 Quid!?"
-
A Parent's Worst Nightmare!
A father entered his daughter's bedroom and saw a letter on the bed. With the worst premonition he read it with trembling hands.
Dear Mum and Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm telling you that I've eloped with my new boyfriend. I've found real love and he is so nice, especially with all his piercings, scars, tattoos, and his big motorcycle. But it is not only that, I'm pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children with me and that is one of my dreams.
I've learned that marijuana doesn't hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and his friends. They're the ones providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasy we could ever want.
In the meantime, we'll pray for science to find the AIDS cure so Ahmed gets better. He deserves it. Don't worry about money, Ahmed has arranged for me to be in films that his friends Leroy and Jamal make in their basement.
Apparently I can earn $50 a scene and I get a $50 bonus if there are more than three men in the scene, and an extra $100 if they use a horse. Don't worry Mum, now I'm 15 years old I know how to take care of myself.
Someday I'll visit you and Dad so that you can meet your grandchildren.
Your loving daughter, Aimee
P.S. Dad, it's not true, I'm at a neighbours house. I just wanted to show you that there are worse things in life than denting the car. Sorry about your BMW.
-
The Blind Mans Blonde Joke
A blind man and his guide dog enter a Bar and find their way to a bar stool. After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind guy yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately becomes absolutely quiet. In a husky, deep voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde and I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb. blonde with a black belt in karate. What's more, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and she's a weight lifter. The lady to your right is a blonde, and she's a pro wrestler.
Think about it seriously, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind guy thinks a moment and says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
-
A Parent's Worst Nightmare!
A father entered his daughter's bedroom and saw a letter on the bed. With the worst premonition he read it with trembling hands.
Dear Mum and Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm telling you that I've eloped with my new boyfriend. I've found real love and he is so nice, especially with all his piercings, scars, tattoos, and his big motorcycle. But it is not only that, I'm pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children with me and that is one of my dreams.
I've learned that marijuana doesn't hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and his friends. They're the ones providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasy we could ever want.
In the meantime, we'll pray for science to find the AIDS cure so Ahmed gets better. He deserves it. Don't worry about money, Ahmed has arranged for me to be in films that his friends Leroy and Jamal make in their basement.
Apparently I can earn $50 a scene and I get a $50 bonus if there are more than three men in the scene, and an extra $100 if they use a horse. Don't worry Mum, now I'm 15 years old I know how to take care of myself.
Someday I'll visit you and Dad so that you can meet your grandchildren.
Your loving daughter, Aimee
P.S. Dad, it's not true, I'm at a neighbours house. I just wanted to show you that there are worse things in life than denting the car. Sorry about your BMW.
Clever b***!!
LMFAOO!!!!
-
LMAO!!! + REP abdulrahamn and q80boy!!
damn that was funy :D!!
although my jokes are better :P jk
aight im gonna give u a killer one.. just before I say it..
the word "Penis" is not a swear word, I took it in Bio class.. so dont report me. -Rep me nor Ban me k?
here it goes:
A man is lying in bed in the hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young nurse appears to sponge his hands and feet.
"Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "Are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, I'm only here to wash your hands and feet".
He struggles again to ask, "Nurse, are my testicles black?" Finally, she pulls back the covers, raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in her other hand and takes a close look, and says "There is nothing wrong with them!"
Finally, the man pulls off his oxygen mask and replies, "That was very nice but, are... my... test... results... back?
ROFL!!!
Thats overrated.. not right >:(
-
A man was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie.
The genie said "OK, OK. You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. You only get one wish!"
The man sat and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick.
Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"
The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible. Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete...how much steel!! No-think of another wish."
The man said OK and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally,he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand women....know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment....know why they're crying, know what they really want when they say 'nothing'....know how to make them truly happy...."
The genie said, "You want that bridge two lanes or four?"
ouch! lol :P
-
A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. Why of course, comes the reply.
The first man then asks: Where are you from?
I'm from Ireland, replies the second man.
The first man responds: You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland.
Of Course, replies the second man.
Curious, the first man then asks:"Where in Ireland are you from?
Dublin, comes the reply.
I can't believe it, says the first man."I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin.
Of course, replies the second man.
Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: What school did you go to?
Saint Mary's, replies the second man. I graduated in 62.
This is unbelievable! the first man says. I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!
About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. What's been going on? he asks the bartender.
Nothing much, replies the bartender. The O'Malley twins are drunk again.
-
mmmmm i think men only think of themselves...women have no choice at the end.... :( and for me i am ready to marry the son of the gardener if i really love him!!lol!! just kidden... :P
*cough* vice-versa *cough*
-
the |BMW joke made me scream
-
ROTF
wus with all the blonde and anti-female jokes in here (not that i'm complaining)?!
man yusef, abdulrhaman, and Eagle, you people are GREAT!
but one lil thing, aren't you afraid of the women's revenge?
i still find it weird that neither shoushu nor sweetsh nor any others is replying yet (remember who won the last time twilight? :P)
-
the |BMW joke made me scream
lmao
imagining u screaming :P
-
Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single.
One day, the millionaire decides to throw a huge party, and during the party he announces, "My dear guests, I have a proposition to every man here. I will give one million dollars, or my daughter, to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge unharmed!"
As soon as he finished his last word, there was the sound of a large splash in the pool. The guy in the pool was swimming with all his might, and the crowd began to cheer him on. Finally, he made it to the other side of the pool unharmed.
The millionaire was impressed. He said, "That was incredible! Fantastic! I didn't think it could be done! Well, I must keep my end of the bargain. Do you want my daughter or the one million dollars?"
The guy catches his breath, then says, "Listen, I don't want your money! And I don't want your daughter! I want the bastard who pushed me in the pool!"
AHAHAHAH!!! LMFAOO!!
-
A married couple is driving down the interstate doing 55 mph. The husband is behind the wheel.
His wife looks over at him and says, 'Honey, I know we've been married for 15 years, but, I want a divorce.' The husband says nothing but slowly increases speed to 60 mph.
She then says, 'I don't want you to try to talk me out of it, because I've been having an affair with your best friend, and he's a better lover than you.' Again the husband stays quiet and just speeds up as he clenches his hands on the wheels.
She says, 'I want the house.' Again the husband speeds up, and now is doing 70 mph.
She says, 'I want the kids too.' The husband just keeps driving faster, and faster, until he's up to 80 mph.
She says, 'I want the car, the checking account, and all the credit cards too.' The husband slowly starts to veer toward a bridge overpass piling, as she says, 'Is there anything you want?'
The husband says, 'No, I've got everything I need right here.' She asks, 'What's that?'
The husband replies just before they hit the wall at 90 mph, 'I've got the airbag!'
-
ROTF
wus with all the blonde and anti-female jokes in here (not that i'm complaining)?!
man yusef, abdulrhaman, and Eagle, you people are GREAT!
but one lil thing, aren't you afraid of the women's revenge?
i still find it weird that neither shoushu nor sweetsh nor any others is replying yet (remember who won the last time twilight? :P)
haha ive noticed too, they'll never find us ;)
-
ROTF
wus with all the blonde and anti-female jokes in here (not that i'm complaining)?!
man yusef, abdulrhaman, and Eagle, you people are GREAT!
but one lil thing, aren't you afraid of the women's revenge?
i still find it weird that neither shoushu nor sweetsh nor any others is replying yet (remember who won the last time twilight? :P)
'
Hey ok!! i didnt reply because i still haven't read any!! but it seems that we r being insulted and i am not there for the slap back!! For the sake of women..here i come!!lol!!
ill read them now, they better be good!! >:(
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hehe.... guyz... hope ur all prepared.... here cums Monica the slapper ...:P :P :P :P :P
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hahaha!! ya the slapper!! i am innocent and weak!! :-[ I am kind and sweet!! :-[ I am cute and pretty!! :-[
BUT NOT WITH GUYZ!! >:( >:( >:(
haha!!lol!! jokkin!! :P :P :P
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lol. yeah I know u are matie.... ur the sweetest out of us all... and the slaps come with the package :P
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lol. yeah I know u are matie.... ur the sweetest out of us all... and the slaps come with the package :P
hahahahaha!! hey roxy read wid me their jokes, lets check wat they wrote!
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lol.. which one r u on ?
-
lol! i still didnt start yet...i am posting in the IGCSE...but here ill start from before the last page....
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There was 3 women stuck on the side of a river. None of them could swim, so while they were figuring out how to get across, they found a bottle and a genie popped out and said that he woulg grant them i wish each.
So woman #1 jumps forward and said: "make me 100 times smarter" sooo... *pop*! She was, so she ran into a barn got out some straw and made a raft. She set it on the water sits on it it falls apart and she drowns.
So woman #2 jumps up and says: "make me 1000 times smarter" sooo... *pop*! She was, so she ran into the forest got some twigs built a raft put it on the water got half way across the river it fell apart he drowned and got washed away.
So woman #3 said to the genie: "make me a million times smarter" sooo... *pop*! She turned into a man and walked across the bridge.
:P
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AHAHAHA!!!! LMAOO!!!
Ouch ladies.. :P
-
DAMN!
, Round II of GUYS VS GALS
AND THE WINNer..... VIA KNOCKOUT IS....... GUYS! :P
-
WATEVER!! u know that it is proved that girls r more clever than guys....and that there mind grow faster than that of a boy...even when they r babies they learn how to walk in a younger age than boys...EVEn they use the toilet....not pampers
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Birthday Night Out
Dave works hard at the plant and spends most evenings bowling. His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday, she decides to take him to a strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey Dave, how ya doin?"
His wife puzzled, asks if he's ever been here before?
"Oh no," says Dave. "He's on my bowling team."
When they are seated, the waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual Budweiser. His wife is becoming uncomfortable and says, "Are you sure you've never been here before?".
"No, honey, she's in the Ladies Bowling League. We share lanes with them."
A stripper comes over to their table and throws her arms around Dave. "Hi Davey," she says, "Want your usual table dance?"
Dave's wife is furious and storms out of the club. Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her, but she starts screaming at him.
The cabby turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real **** tonight, Dave."
-
Drive-through cash-point
Barclays have recently announced the arrival of the new 'Drive - Through' cash-point machine; users will be able to withdraw cash without having to leave their vehicle. To enable users to be utilise this new facility; the following procedures have been drawn up. Please read the procedure that applies to your own circumstances (i.e. Male or Female) and remember them for when you first use the machines.
Male Procedure:
Drive up to cash machine.
Wind down window.
Insert card and enter PIN.
Enter amount of cash to withdraw.
Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
Wind up window.
Drive off.
Female Procedure:
Drive up to cash machine.
Reverse back 1 metre to align window to machine.
Stall engine.
Wind down window.
Enter handbag and remove make-up bag and locate card.
Check make-up in rear view mirror.
Attempt to insert card into machine.
Open door to allow easier access to machine, due to distance from car to machine.
Insert card.
Re-enter handbag to find cigarette packet with PIN number written on inside.
Insert PIN, press cancel and re-enter PIN.
Enter amount of cash to withdraw.
Check make-up and hair in rear view mirror.
Retrieve cash and receipt.
Locate purse and place cash inside.
Locate chequebook to file receipt.
Check make-up again.
Drive forward for 2 metres.
Reverse back to cash machine.
Retrieve card.
Locate cardholder in purse and enter card into slot.
Recheck make-up.
Restart engine and pull off.
Drive for 3 miles.
Release hand brake.
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that's an exam answer :P
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oh my god!! haha!! ya right!! that person is lier...and stupid tooo!! >:( >:( >:(
GUYS R L.O.S.E.R.S
-
Dont try these chat up lines
Dont mess me around darling, just take off your clothese and give me your money. IT DIDNT WORK!
When I orgasm darlin, parallel lines pulse and cross. How is it for you? NOPE!
WOW! You're a nig girl! OUCH! THAT HURT!
-
WATEVER!! u know that it is proved that girls r more clever than guys....and that there mind grow faster than that of a boy...even when they r babies they learn how to walk in a younger age than boys...EVEn they use the toilet....not pampers
Somebody is getting jealous
i wrecked my mind thinking of female genuises, and the on ly name that came up to my head was Marie Currie
one second thinking about male genuises, i have 4 names already: Pierre Currie (yea, he's Marie's husband lol) , Alfred Noble, Albert Einstein, Ahmad Zouille (or however hes spelt).
Athletes: People atlking about Michel Phelps, Ian Thorpe, Usain Bolt, Ismail Ahmed Ismail (:P),Roger Federer Rafel Nadal, and then a bit further down Maria Sharapova and Ivanovic (and they ain't mentioned because of their athleticism either :P)
and maybe our brains take so mch time to develope cause we develope further than famels?! didn't you think of that?!
OUCH!
-
Or maybe men are either very good or bad at something, but women are all just average!
Actually I dont think this is true. I think Most men are ver stupid, and women are more intelligent than men. In the UK there are now women medical students than men now.
-
another exam question :P
-
Or maybe men are either very good or bad at something, but women are all just average!
Actually I dont think this is true. I think Most men are ver stupid, and women are more intelligent than men. In the UK there are now women medical students than men now.
In the U.K. only! The UK is only part of the world! C'mon Astar, r u turning against your own gender?!
-
another exam question :P
LOLZ
-
Or maybe men are either very good or bad at something, but women are all just average!
Actually I dont think this is true. I think Most men are ver stupid, and women are more intelligent than men. In the UK there are now women medical students than men now.
OH MY GOD!! NOW GUYS BEAT THAT!! THE TRUTH CAME FROM A MAN(WHO IS ALAWYS GETTIN A STARS IN PHYSICS AND MATH) seee he is intelligent!! A BIG SLAP ON UR FACE OMER, EAGLE, ABDO, ZERO, AND Q80....HAHAHA!! EVIL LAUGH!!
-
Or maybe men are either very good or bad at something, but women are all just average!
Actually I dont think this is true. I think Most men are ver stupid, and women are more intelligent than men. In the UK there are now women medical students than men now.
OH MY GOD!! NOW GUYS BEAT THAT!! THE TRUTH CAME FROM A MAN(WHO IS ALAWYS GETTIN A STARS IN PHYSICS AND MATH) seee he is intelligent!! A BIG SLAP ON UR FACE OMER, EAGLE, ABDO, ZERO, AND Q80....HAHAHA!! EVIL LAUGH!!
HEY!
You still didn't answer my previous post! don't try to run away!
(p.s. we don't like studying medicine, we're more into arcetecture and engineering, his name is astar MATH and PHYSCIS, MATH + PHYSCICS= ENGINEERING!)
-
Or maybe men are either very good or bad at something, but women are all just average!
Actually I dont think this is true. I think Most men are ver stupid, and women are more intelligent than men. In the UK there are now women medical students than men now.
OH MY GOD!! NOW GUYS BEAT THAT!! THE TRUTH CAME FROM A MAN(WHO IS ALAWYS GETTIN A STARS IN PHYSICS AND MATH) seee he is intelligent!! A BIG SLAP ON UR FACE OMER, EAGLE, ABDO, ZERO, AND Q80....HAHAHA!! EVIL LAUGH!!
HEY!
You still didn't answer my previous post! don't try to run away!
(p.s. we don't like studying medicine, we're more into arcetecture and engineering, his name is astar MATH and PHYSCIS, MATH + PHYSCICS= ENGINEERING!)
lol,
ya ya, i agree, i dont want to become a plastic surgoen, i wanna become an engineer, medicne is for girls, boys like more challenging jobs if u know what i mean :P
and shosho, that slap hurt !! im telling my mum :'( lol
-
I am already takin all the subject related to ENGINEERING, becuz i am going to be an engineer(inshallah)!! see we work for both!! :P
-
one person does not represent the whole gender!
(you like engineering, yusef likes medicine, there you go, balanced out :P)
-
haha!! just dont run from the truth!! ADMIT THE FACT!! i won!! hahahahahaha(evil) and i am only one girl..i bet if Roxy, sweetsh, angel, twilight..and those girls u would've been melted... :P :P
-
without Bill Gates (a guy), none of us would of known each other, so guys are smarter since no woman has ever invented something known :P
-
KHALAS guys i wont argue anymore!! i already won!! :P :P :P
-
oh c'mon shoshou, you just saying one thing "astar helped me! Astar helped me!" Now thats a value judgement (yay! i'm ready for economics), you ain't showing us solid facts!
and to back up abdulrahman's point about bill gates, even the CEO of Apple is a man!
-
Astar is the fact!! :P :P :P
-
Ok, so we got 2 wins for the guys and one draw
1 win for blowing you out in the previous jokes (victory by knockout)
1 win for blowing you out again wheny Roxy and Shoushu tried to Rally (but still lost anyways by forfeit)
and 1 draw between me and Twilight (see the nicknames thread)
so its 2-1-0!
-
meh, why cant we just say, both women and men are equally smart :P
without man, there would be no woman :P
without woman, there would be no man :P
^_^
and WooT someone reached 600 posts !
-
but look lol, some of the inventions by women are funny XD
http://www.factmonster.com/ipka/A0906931.html
Chocolate-chip cookies, Dishwasher etc XD
-
and woot i just noticed imma senior cit ^_^, its true im getting older as exams are finishing, mentally and physically :P
-
OH CONGRATS ABDO!!
and what u said is true men and women r equally smart..they actually continue each other!!lol!! how does that sound(a 40 years old lady talkin)haha!!
-
yea ok, i can live wid dat
it IS true, even the great DaVinci said that man and woman complete each other like a jigsaw (or words to that effect)
and congrats abdo :)
-
yea ok, i can live wid dat
it IS true, even the great DaVinci said that man and woman complete each other like a jigsaw (or words to that effect)
and congrats abdo :)
they say great minds think alike 8)
and Thanks shosh and Om3r
-
OK THEN PEOPLE!! ITS A TI!! lol!!
shosh is a nice nick!lol!!
-
congrats 7amany !!
3ogbal il alf !! ;)
-
congrats 7amany !!
3ogbal il alf !! ;)
hahaha thanks :P
-
OK THEN PEOPLE!! ITS A TI!! lol!!
shosh is a nice nick!lol!!
TI = Tie :P
and shosh sounds much more fun than shosho :P
-
yea ok, i can live wid dat
it IS true, even the great DaVinci said that man and woman complete each other like a jigsaw (or words to that effect)
and congrats abdo :)
they say great minds think alike 8)
and Thanks shosh and Om3r
too late results were already announced, just burry it now :P
-
post number 1400
wohoooooooooo !!
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
-
OK THEN PEOPLE!! ITS A TI!! lol!!
shosh is a nice nick!lol!!
TI = Tie :P
and shosh sounds much more fun than shosho :P
i still belive Sherry or Monica is better (maybe thats cuz i got problems pronounce double letters sperated by vowels)
-
Why does the bride always wear white?
Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.
ur owned girls !! :P
-
Why does the bride always wear white?
Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.
ur owned girls !! :P
Omg! the groom also wear white!! (dishdashah!!)! ofcourse to match the stove and refrigerator loool
-
sherry is good....but then zero told me its not cool :-\
most of the votes chose shosho not monica lol!
-
Why does the bride always wear white?
Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.
ur owned girls !! :P
Omg! the groom also wear white!! (dishdashah!!)! ofcourse to match the stove and refrigerator loool
i'll get married in the winter, hah ur OWNED !! :P
-
haha nice joke, and congrats Yasouf :P 3ogbal il million :D !!
-
Thanks 7amany ;D
another joke,
What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
About 6 dress sizes.
-
lol... okay guyz... chek this out ...
A man and his wife had an argument, they were driving in the car and they were passing a farm
with sheeps and cows etc.
so the husband says to the wife "Family of yours?"
and the wife replies. "yes, the in-laws"
:P :P
Smart women :P
-
i'll get married in the winter, hah ur OWNED !! :P
hehehe u caught me!! I knew u r going to say that but took a chance that u'll not think of it :P
You can still match the oven (if it's dark lol)
mabrook ;)
-
Thanks 7amany ;D
another joke,
What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
About 6 dress sizes.
and one can be more fun than the other ^_^
-
oh well, gtg now, still got a tiny bit of eco to cover before the new paper 3 (old paper 6) to cover for tomorrow, so salam yusef, abdo, and .... (was gonna say ur name,shousha, but then changed my mind, let u suffer for a while :P)
and p.s. yusef, keep up the good work ;)
-
Why do women Knit?
To give them something to think about while they're talking.
-
yousef...hmmm against women hmmm ;D
-
byebye OT, gl in ur exam tmr :P
-
haha!! ya right omer!! i would never suffer, actually i hate guys and i get millions of requests from them..... :P :P :P
-
oh well, gtg now, still got a tiny bit of eco to cover before the new paper 3 (old paper 6) to cover for tomorrow, so salam yusef, abdo, and .... (was gonna say ur name,shousha, but then changed my mind, let u suffer for a while :P)
and p.s. yusef, keep up the good work ;)
good luck in ur exams!
-
haha.. nyc one Mony ...:P
Good luck O.T13
-
This came in the IG chem Paper 6 :P
MATERIAL SAFETY DATA SHEET
WOMEN: CHEMICAL ANALYSIS
ELEMENT: Women
DISCOVERER: Adam
ATOMIC MASS: Accepted as 53.6kg, but known to vary from 40 to 200kg
OCCURRENCE: Copious quantities in all urban areas
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Surface usually covered with painted film
2. Boils at nothing, freezes without any known reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has a great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
3. May explode spontaneously without prior notice and for no known reason
4. Insoluble in liquid, but activity increases greatly by saturation in alcohol
5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man
COMMON USES:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars
2. Can be a great aid to relaxation
3. Very effective cleaning agent
TESTS:
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in it's natural state
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen
HAZARDS:
1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands
2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into contact with each other
-
HAHAHAHAHAHA!! THATS REALLY FUNNY!! HAHAHA!!
-
A man came home from work, sat down in his favourite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts."
She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer. When he finished it, he said, "Quick, bring me another beer. It's going to start."
This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer. When it was gone, he said, "Quick, another beer before it starts."
"That's it!" She blows her top, "You bastard! You waltz in here, flop your fat "behind" down, don't even say hello to me and then expect me to run around like your slave. Don't you realize that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day long?"
The husband sighed. "Damn, it's started."
Moral of the story: Men dont listen to women's nagging, so dont waste ur time !! :P
-
2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into contact with each other
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!
+ rep u made my day :P
-
Finally, scientific proof!
"Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of
female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 75% of them became emotional, 80% talked excessively without making sense and 100% couldn't drive. No further testing is planned."
-
2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into contact with each other
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!
+ rep u made my day :P
thanks mate ;)
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lol women where did u all go, it was getting fun :P
-
hehe.... :D
-
Q. Why do men die before their wives?
A. Because they want to.
Q. What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild?
tsk, tsk, what were u thinking ??!!
A. Money
-
haha a heater in a bathroom just burst, FLOOD FLOOD ! ^_^
-
and lol @ yousefs joke XD
-
Whoever said nothing was impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door.
-
lolllll....!!!
-
@ Q80's sexist joke .. umm ... the moral aint that men dont listen to woman nagging .. the moral is how much of ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall.. you couldnt even get you "fat" bottom up to get a friggin bottle of beer? ahahahaha.. you couldnt even live a day without woman doing ur work .. lmao .. idiots ..
-
lol...!
I like it crypsanity ;)
-
@ Q80's sexist joke .. umm ... the moral aint that men dont listen to woman nagging .. the moral is how much of ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall.. you couldnt even get you "fat" bottom up to get a friggin bottle of beer? ahahahaha.. you couldnt even live a day without woman doing ur work .. lmao .. idiots ..
no, no,
the moral, is that women are men's slaves :P
and thats it !! full stop :P
-
I'm bak ppl :)
The Real Defnition of words wen usd By women (no offense to all the ladies here ;)
Fine - I am right. This argument is over. You need to shut up.
That's Okay - One of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. "That's okay" means she wants to think hard and long before deciding when and how you'll pay for your mistake.
Nothing - The calm before the storm. This means "Something" and you better be on your toes. Note: Arguments that start with "Nothing" usually end with "Fine" (See #1).
Five Minutes - If getting dress, this means half an hour. (Don't be mad about this. It's the same definition for you when it's your turn to do some chores around the house.
Thanks - A woman is thanking you. Do not question this or faint. Just say, "You're welcome," and let it go.
Loud Sigh - Not actually a word but rather a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. It means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is standing here wasting her time arguing with you about "Nothing." (See #3)
Go Ahead - This is a dare, not permission. (Don't Do It!)
Don't worry about it, I got it - The second most dangerous statement a woman can make. It means that a woman has asked a man several times to do something and is now doing it herself. (This will result in you asking at a later date, "What's wrong?" For the woman's response, see #3.)
-
oh cum on man.... dont tell me thts how ur gonna treat ur wife :P
-
@ Q80's sexist joke .. umm ... the moral aint that men dont listen to woman nagging .. the moral is how much of ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall.. you couldnt even get you "fat" bottom up to get a friggin bottle of beer? ahahahaha.. you couldnt even live a day without woman doing ur work .. lmao .. idiots ..
woow someone is getting very angry , "ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall" <-- lol ?
-
@ Q80's sexist joke .. umm ... the moral aint that men dont listen to woman nagging .. the moral is how much of ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall.. you couldnt even get you "fat" bottom up to get a friggin bottle of beer? ahahahaha.. you couldnt even live a day without woman doing ur work .. lmao .. idiots ..
no, no,
the moral, is that women are men's slaves :P
and thats it !! full stop :P
ahahahha.. dude.. if thats how yall men interpret it.. simply shows ur level of maturity??? ahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa.... gosh .. make me =] laugh .. (incase yall dont even get what im saying as ur average intellect in interpreting basic things in life is like wow .. um trying to call yall stupid .. here .. =]
-
@ Q80's sexist joke .. umm ... the moral aint that men dont listen to woman nagging .. the moral is how much of ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall.. you couldnt even get you "fat" bottom up to get a friggin bottle of beer? ahahahaha.. you couldnt even live a day without woman doing ur work .. lmao .. idiots ..
no, no,
the moral, is that women are men's slaves :P
and thats it !! full stop :P
ahahahha.. dude.. if thats how yall men interpret it.. simply shows ur level of maturity??? ahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa.... gosh .. make me =] laugh .. (incase yall dont even get what im saying as ur average intellect in interpreting basic things in life is like wow .. um trying to call yall stupid .. here .. =]
ooooooooooooooooooo
q80 ..
if i wer in ur place .. i wud hv keeeld er!!
-
@ Q80's sexist joke .. umm ... the moral aint that men dont listen to woman nagging .. the moral is how much of ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall.. you couldnt even get you "fat" bottom up to get a friggin bottle of beer? ahahahaha.. you couldnt even live a day without woman doing ur work .. lmao .. idiots ..
woow someone is getting very angry , "ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall" <-- lol ?
nawwws man.. stating common sense..
-
lmao i was refering to the use of ur words, like pathetic :P
-
@ Q80's sexist joke .. umm ... the moral aint that men dont listen to woman nagging .. the moral is how much of ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall.. you couldnt even get you "fat" bottom up to get a friggin bottle of beer? ahahahaha.. you couldnt even live a day without woman doing ur work .. lmao .. idiots ..
no, no,
the moral, is that women are men's slaves :P
and thats it !! full stop :P
ahahahha.. dude.. if thats how yall men interpret it.. simply shows ur level of maturity??? ahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa.... gosh .. make me =] laugh .. (incase yall dont even get what im saying as ur average intellect in interpreting basic things in life is like wow .. um trying to call yall stupid .. here .. =]
ooooooooooooooooooo
q80 ..
if i wer in ur place .. i wud hv keeeld er!!
lol,
kill her ??
naah, i dont blame her, cause as every one knows, girls talk alot, and dont even understand what theyr'e saying :P
-
@ abdul rahman haha .. yeah so those are the word ya need to use if men like yall think like that .. =]
-
aaaaanywayz guyz.... ;D
-
WOHOOOOOOOOOO!!CUM ON GIRLS LETS BEAT THE STUPID GUYS!!LOL!!
-
the difference between men & women
Eating Out:
When the bill arrives, John, Brad, Tony and Daniel will each throw in $20, even though the total is only $34.25. None of them will have any smaller bills and none will admit they want change back.
When Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
Money:
A man will pay $10 for a $5 item he needs.
A woman will pay $5 for a $10 item that she doesn't need, because it's on sale.
Bathrooms:
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, razor, shaving cream, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Motel 6.
The average number of items in a woman's bathroom is 328. The average man would not be able to identify most of them.
well, who's better?
u decide :P
-
@ Q80's sexist joke .. umm ... the moral aint that men dont listen to woman nagging .. the moral is how much of ungrateful drones are you pathetic men .. die yall.. you couldnt even get you "fat" bottom up to get a friggin bottle of beer? ahahahaha.. you couldnt even live a day without woman doing ur work .. lmao .. idiots ..
no, no,
the moral, is that women are men's slaves :P
and thats it !! full stop :P
ahahahha.. dude.. if thats how yall men interpret it.. simply shows ur level of maturity??? ahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa.... gosh .. make me =] laugh .. (incase yall dont even get what im saying as ur average intellect in interpreting basic things in life is like wow .. um trying to call yall stupid .. here .. =]
ooooooooooooooooooo
q80 ..
if i wer in ur place .. i wud hv keeeld er!!
lol,
kill her ??
naah, i dont blame her, cause as every one knows, girls talk alot, and dont even understand what theyr'e saying :P
yes yes q80
urls talk a lot
no wonder
u hav 1400+ posts
and she has round 100??
-
wooot fight fight fight fight :D
-
SLAP Q80 ON DA FACE PEOPLE!! WAY TO GO RESHIA!! ;)
-
hahahahh...!!!
wow ... u guyz are a laugh n a half :P
-
looool
i wasnt talking much :P
it was either helping u guys or posting jokes here
and were'nt u on our side a minute ago ?? :P
-
Heyyyy .... who -repped me ?
-
ok ill +rep u!!
-
looool
i wasnt talking much :P
it was either helping u guys or posting jokes here
and were'nt u on our side a minute ago ?? :P
loooooool no
wht this man??
i ws putting oil in the fire ...
-
haha its funny that for the past 2 hours hardly anyone defended the women, now they made their own little "gang" since theres no guys left :P
-
Thanks...
my repp is sooo low compared 2 u guyz honestly .... wot did I do ....:P
but anywayz Thanks Monyyy :D
-
GOsh Q80 .. dint you get that?? sadddd mannn.. saddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd... ! =p ahahahahaha
and wonder why i call yall dumb? lolllllllll
-
Thanks...
my repp is sooo low compared 2 u guyz honestly .... wot did I do ....:P
but anywayz Thanks Monyyy :D
dude ..
chk out my rep .. hello??
-
men get beatin easily :P when i was alone i beated all the guys...now girls r joind da club so better watch out!!! :P :P
-
lol. whoops... anywayz I +repped u :D
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@ abdulrahman .. tahnsk abunch man .. we ain lifeless.. gosh u mht be .. loll.. we have a LIFEEE>. it sim[ply happens to be we girls think alike eh .. btu sighs lol.. how could i even expect you to get tht? sorry .. my bad..
-
haha dear, easy, ur acting like a man now :P
-
men get beatin easily :P when i was alone i beated all the guys...now girls r joind da club so better watch out!!! :P :P
what men?? :P
-
bye guys and gals,
gd night :)
-
bye guys and gals,
gd night :)
byebye, gn and gl with any exams :P
-
men get beatin easily :P when i was alone i beated all the guys...now girls r joind da club so better watch out!!! :P :P
what men?? :P
u maybe ? XD
-
men get beatin easily :P when i was alone i beated all the guys...now girls r joind da club so better watch out!!! :P :P
what men?? :P
u maybe ? XD
yes abdulrahman
far more manly than ull evr be ..!!
-
haha dear, easy, ur acting like a man now :P
ahaha.. um not acting like a man .. just because u think all girl are pretty and pink and loveeee to gossip and n when need to defen hide their face..
goshhh.. gimmi a breakk .. u have a narrow opinion of ppl out thr in the world..
-
I gtg people!! now crypsanity, risha and roxy...kill abdo(he is the only boy left all of them ran away)
Good night people( kisses and hugs) dnt worry roxy ill increase ur reps so that they r like mine!! :-* :-* :-*
and as usual dont forget to pray isha!! :-\
-
hahaha its true, have u read this ? it proves every point u just did in the last 20 mins
2. Boils at nothing, freezes without any known reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore
3. May explode spontaneously without prior notice and for no known reason
-
I gtg people!! now crypsanity, risha and roxy...kill abdo(he is the only boy left all of them ran away)
Good night people( kisses and hugs) dnt worry roxy ill increase ur reps so that they r like mine!! :-* :-* :-*
and as usual dont forget to pray isha!! :-\
haha bye bye shosh ill survive i guarentee u :P
gl in ur exam
-
thnxxx loaad mony :D
hehe dnt wry we'll sort abdo out :P
good night (hugs nd kisses)
:-*
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hahaha its true, have u read this ? it proves every point u just did in the last 20 mins
2. Boils at nothing, freezes without any known reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore
3. May explode spontaneously without prior notice and for no known reason
omigosh ?!!??!
was tht an original??
9sarcasm excretin - tellin ya cus u just myt not get it )
n bii shoushou!!
-
haha reish talk properly, we dont live with street rappers ? :P
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oryt guyz ima get goingg yh
got to start literature !!!
so Take care...
Toodles..... :D
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oryt guyz ima get goingg yh
got to start literature !!!
so Take care...
Toodles..... :D
same, lit is kinda hard :/
"toodles" :P
-
haha reish talk properly, we dont live with street rappers ? :P
lol .. is dat supposd to offend me??
hahaha
how can i recover frm such an insult??
-
@ abd.. ahahahahaha.. say what?????? ... lol .. does that even make sense? ummm.. right probably to you .. sorry .. i dont get random stuff browsed from the net yasee .. msot of dont make sense .. have my own brains to think from ..
-
oryt guyz ima get goingg yh
got to start literature !!!
so Take care...
Toodles..... :D
bii!!
-
@ abd.. ahahahahaha.. say what?????? ... lol .. does that even make sense? ummm.. right probably to you .. sorry .. i dont get random stuff browsed from the net yasee .. msot of dont make sense .. have my own brains to think from ..
haha u dont just not get random stuff ur not getting anything, no wonder its not making sense, and ur brain is prob not working ? :P
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haha reish talk properly, we dont live with street rappers ? :P
lol .. is dat supposd to offend me??
hahaha
how can i recover frm such an insult??
hah it wasnt supposed to be an insult, women take stuff too seriously :P, its started off as a joke, guess its the hormones in u now eh ?
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@ abd.. ahahahahaha.. say what?????? ... lol .. does that even make sense? ummm.. right probably to you .. sorry .. i dont get random stuff browsed from the net yasee .. msot of dont make sense .. have my own brains to think from ..
haha u dont just not get random stuff ur not getting anything, no wonder its not making sense, and ur brain is prob not working ? :P
that ws ur comeback??
wow .. um impressd
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haha reish talk properly, we dont live with street rappers ? :P
lol .. is dat supposd to offend me??
hahaha
how can i recover frm such an insult??
hah it wasnt supposed to be an insult, women take stuff too seriously :P, its started off as a joke, guess its the hormones in u now eh ?
loooooooool
r u serius??
wher the hell r u takin this??
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Oh wow .. yeah sure some comeback. abd . no its not because my brain doesnt work .. because apparently yasee mate .. ummm .. ur the one whose browsing stuff from the net here .. not me .. :)
goshh .. WANNABE .. lol ..
-
lmaaoo "yasee" haters, how am i a wannabe in any way ? XDDD
and who says "browsing stuff from the net" thats the most stupidest comeback ive ever heard rofllll
-
haha
this is so crazy
abdulrahman .. this is how i imagin u in reality:
'hey yall!! chek out my just-hit-puberty mustache!!"
LIFE MAN!!
-
lmaooo seriously where do u get the stuf u say ??
its all so stupid lol i swear no one has ever said any of these comebacks cuz no one is even stupid enough to say that, 'hey yall!! chek out my just-hit-puberty mustache!!" LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!
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lol @ eisha .. hehe ..
at abd .. umm lol saying "yasee" doesnt make you a wannabe lol ..thats slang.. which living in this generation you simple get it in you.. gosh... its like explaing a b c to you now man .. wow .. ahahaha
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haha
this is so crazy
abdulrahman .. this is how i imagin u in reality:
'hey yall!! chek out my just-hit-puberty mustache!!"
LIFE MAN!!
and lmao what do u know about life, get one and hear real comebacks, 'hey yall!! chek out my just-hit-puberty mustache!!" hahaha thats new XDD
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lol @ eisha .. hehe ..
at abd .. umm lol saying "yasee" doesnt make you a wannabe lol ..thats slang.. which living in this generation you simple get it in you.. gosh... its like explaing a b c to you now man .. wow .. ahahaha
i know what it means lol, u said wannabe in the next part, i was talking about that "yasee"
-
use ur brain if u had one ? ;)
-
ahahaha .. yeah abd .. its like so friggin ironic for u to say that we dont make sense here. .. besides eishamix said mocking U .. visualizing an image of an impression U give US ..now if ur stupid.. duh itll be something stupid eh .. lol
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naah, i dont blame her, cause as every one knows, girls talk alot, and dont even understand what theyr'e saying :P
:'( who said that?? We talk alot yes but we do understand what we are saying ::)
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lmaooo seriously where do u get the stuf u say ??
its all so stupid lol i swear no one has ever said any of these comebacks cuz no one is even stupid enough to say that, 'hey yall!! chek out my just-hit-puberty mustache!!" LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!
U repeated my line twice!!hehe
i knw u loooooove me
i knw u looooooooooove me
=P
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lol @ eisha .. hehe ..
at abd .. umm lol saying "yasee" doesnt make you a wannabe lol ..thats slang.. which living in this generation you simple get it in you.. gosh... its like explaing a b c to you now man .. wow .. ahahaha
i know what it means lol, u said wannabe in the next part, i was talking about that "yasee"
gosh u seriously cannot comprehend what um saying do u?? goshh.. i knew what u meant.. i replied to that .. i said SAYING YASEE doens make u a wannabe .. not that u didnt get it.. ahahahahah .. cant stop laughing.. u made my day .. =]
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hahaha lmao w/e, im not hear to argue with 2 idiots :P, and By the way u should put 'hey yall!! chek out my just-hit-puberty mustache!!" as ur sig its really funny lololol, have u ever said that to someone else, he'd prob die of laughter too lol, and cryp if u were too smart to notice, i just said every alphabet in my posts, dont need u to explain a b c d anymore, i just proved im smart enough for u :P
-
haha ever heard of this quote, " never argue with an idiot, they drag u down to their level and beat u with experience " yaseee XD
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and if u were smart enough u would of gone like 5-6 pages back, and ud see me defending women when everyone was against them, i felt sry for them hahaha, and the jokes were just too insulting for u, next person will prob say something like, thats not true, its because ur a woman, hahaha, what a classic XD
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hahaha lmao w/e, im not hear to argue with 2 idiots :P, and By the way u should put 'hey yall!! chek out my just-hit-puberty mustache!!" as ur sig its really funny lololol, have u ever said that to someone else, he'd prob die of laughter too lol, and cryp if u were too smart to notice, i just said every alphabet in my posts, dont need u to explain a b c d anymore, i just proved im smart enough for u :P
its ok abdelrahman .. its kay ..
i understand ...
ur having a hard tym fitting in at school ..
u hav no frnds ...
evn if u hav frnds .. they r confind to this teeeeeny meeeeeeny leeeeeeeetl forum ..
ts kay ..
i understand
cryps .. stop being so hard on the poor thing now ..
-
hahaha lmao w/e, im not hear to argue with 2 idiots :P, and By the way u should put 'hey yall!! chek out my just-hit-puberty mustache!!" as ur sig its really funny lololol, have u ever said that to someone else, he'd prob die of laughter too lol, and cryp if u were too smart to notice, i just said every alphabet in my posts, dont need u to explain a b c d anymore, i just proved im smart enough for u :P
its ok abdelrahman .. its kay ..
i understand ...
ur having a hard tym fitting in at school ..
u hav no frnds ...
evn if u hav frnds .. they r confind to this teeeeeny meeeeeeny leeeeeeeetl forum ..
ts kay ..
i understand
cryps .. stop being so hard on the poor thing now ..
lmao if u havent noticed all ur comebacks are based on what u think, get ur facts straight woman, and prove em ;)
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LOL .. yeah .. ts k.. absolutely .. ;)
-
hahaha lmao w/e, im not hear to argue with 2 idiots :P, and By the way u should put 'hey yall!! chek out my just-hit-puberty mustache!!" as ur sig its really funny lololol, have u ever said that to someone else, he'd prob die of laughter too lol, and cryp if u were too smart to notice, i just said every alphabet in my posts, dont need u to explain a b c d anymore, i just proved im smart enough for u :P
its ok abdelrahman .. its kay ..
i understand ...
ur having a hard tym fitting in at school ..
u hav no frnds ...
evn if u hav frnds .. they r confind to this teeeeeny meeeeeeny leeeeeeeetl forum ..
ts kay ..
i understand
cryps .. stop being so hard on the poor thing now ..
lmao if u havent noticed all ur comebacks are based on what u think, get ur facts straight woman, and prove em ;)
tut tut .. sad
its ok ..
ur not alone
ther r millions of other losers like u out ther
just hav patience ..
-
awwwwww abd .. i now honestly feel .. sad? i
-
and for ur next post think very well about wht ur going to say, dont say anything bout what u think, cuz u cant prove them ;)
and lmao this was what i was going to say before u just posted ur last post
and if u prove im alone and have no friends, i wont deny it ;)
-
awwwwww abd .. i now honestly feel .. sad? i
hahaha feel sad all u want who cares :P
-
and now seriously think about ur next post and dont act as if u know me ;)
-
indeed.. my friend indeed.. doesnt stop making us sympathize u .. =]
-
and for ur next post think very well about wht ur going to say, dont say anything bout what u think, cuz u cant prove them ;)
and lmao this was what i was going to say before u just posted ur last post
and if u prove im alone and have no friends, i wont deny it ;)
ohh abd .. relax
its really ok
u dnt hav to prove ur strong by posting three tymz in a row ...
thts just ... nt gnna help ...
its ok ...
calm down ...
breathe ....
-
indeed.. my friend indeed.. doesnt stop making us sympathize u .. =]
haha, u can sympathize me, i sympathize u for being too stupid hahaha
-
and for ur next post think very well about wht ur going to say, dont say anything bout what u think, cuz u cant prove them ;)
and lmao this was what i was going to say before u just posted ur last post
and if u prove im alone and have no friends, i wont deny it ;)
ohh abd .. relax
its really ok
u dnt hav to prove ur strong by posting three tymz in a row ...
thts just ... nt gnna help ...
its ok ...
calm down ...
breathe ....
and lmao seriously just stop ur showing how stupid u are, i have to post 2-3 times in a row because i post something after each stupid thing u say.
-
haha.. u know any rational person reading this would be able to say whose making sense here.. but lol .. ts k .. awww.. lets cheer u up abd.. umm want me to postive rep u? =]
-
indeed.. my friend indeed.. doesnt stop making us sympathize u .. =]
haha, u can sympathize me, i sympathize u for being too stupid hahaha
u knw ..
if u fyt the world as if ur the only one who can ...
its not gonn help ...
were here to help u thru this stage of urs ..
it seems complicated
and as if the world is cruel and all ..
but were here to support u
and to help u get thru this ...
itss seriusly ok to feel this way ..
-
and now seriously haters i have to go, u would prob stay all day just posting after me just to prove something hahaha, how dumb lol, byebye ;)
and cryp, if u havent noticed my smilies in almost every post, im happy cuz all u say is stupid and funny lol. :P
-
indeed.. my friend indeed.. doesnt stop making us sympathize u .. =]
haha, u can sympathize me, i sympathize u for being too stupid hahaha
u knw ..
if u fyt the world as if ur the only one who can ...
its not gonn help ...
were here to help u thru this stage of urs ..
it seems complicated
and as if the world is cruel and all ..
but were here to support u
and to help u get thru this ...
itss seriusly ok to feel this way ..
haha okay watever u say :P
-
wow.. abd such comebacks .. u impress me with.. anyhows .. we are not haters lol.. just playing along but nawwwss ur too dumb to even get tht eh ..
-
and now seriously haters i have to go, u would prob stay all day just posting after me just to prove something hahaha, how dumb lol, byebye ;)
and cryp, if u havent noticed my smilies in almost every post, im happy cuz all u say is stupid and funny lol. :P
ok thn
bii!!
and stay away frm any blades ...
and remmbr therz always sm1 in the world who loves u..
bubye!
-
haha.. sad lol.. eisha.. give the kid a break lol .. anyhowwss bye bye!
-
lol
yea um off
bii
-
p.s just hit me.. incase yall guys took it serious .. umm.. we werent being serious.. ummm just our way to reply to a joke .. but u wouldnt know that because u dont know us.. so have to say this .. no offense to no one ..
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LOOOOOOOOLLLLL ppl u R soooo funnyyy .. :D :D ;D ;D ;D 8)
sorry i was away for a day .. and i came bak 2 find 12 pages .. and I READ THEM ALL .. 8)
LOLLLLLLLLLL PPL UR MAKING MY DAYYY !!! i WAS depressed :-*
and wuts with the anti-woman thingi ..
cmon ppl give it a break ..
and ummmm ... talking abt that ,... just look at my attachments and dont say they r not true ;).. guys u havta b clear with u admitting things :D
lolllll .. I'm kidding ppl .. dont take it seriously ;)
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CNT BELIEVE this THREAD GOT 83 PAGES *_*"
-
p.s just hit me.. incase yall guys took it serious .. umm.. we werent being serious.. ummm just our way to reply to a joke .. but u wouldnt know that because u dont know us.. so have to say this .. no offense to no one ..
haha u seriously have weirrrd livess..
-
CNT BELIEVE this THREAD GOT 83 PAGES *_*"
haha last 10-13 pages were all fights :P
-
and twilight u know some of it is not true hehe, and By the way did u see the new trailer for new moon ?
-
CNT BELIEVE this THREAD GOT 83 PAGES *_*"
haha last 10-13 pages were all fights :P
culdn't retain enouf mind power 2 read 'em all
chem has takin' ma last pieces of concentration ;D
keep up da fit guys
i knw one day..ONE DAY...AMERICA WILL B FREE OF IGCSE'S 'N I'LL READ DA FIT..
LOL i got carried away :P
-
OH MY GOD!! ABDO THEY KILLED U!!
-
and twilight u know some of it is not true hehe, and By the way did u see the new trailer for new moon ?
nah i wanna see it .. i'll hunt 4 i after my xamzzz :D :D ;)
which part is not true??
-
OH MY GOD!! ABDO THEY KILLED U!!
haha no XD
all they said was what they think, nothing thats true, and its funny rofl, and i didnt back down when everyone left too ;)
-
and twilight u know some of it is not true hehe, and By the way did u see the new trailer for new moon ?
nah i wanna see it .. i'll hunt 4 i after my xamzzz :D :D ;)
which part is not true??
just some stuff written on the pics :P
and u can watch the trailer on youtube its looks good :)
-
I am really sorry people never meant to start a fight...lol!! it started between omer and I...lol!! and now everyone got involved... ;D
-
and twilight u know some of it is not true hehe, and By the way did u see the new trailer for new moon ?
nah i wanna see it .. i'll hunt 4 i after my xamzzz :D :D ;)
which part is not true??
just some stuff written on the pics :P
and u can watch the trailer on youtube its looks good :)
omg .. ur gonna let me hunt 4 it now
did u read the book ?? ? i wanna read it
i'm abt to finsh twilight .. its gr888 .. even better than the movie
yeah .. which parts xactly from the pics r not true??
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I am really sorry people never meant to start a fight...lol!! it started between omer and I...lol!! and now everyone got involved... ;D
haha is okay shosh we take it as a joke, they play along as if its a real fight :P
and the wrong part is where it says boys will only want u for a week i garantee u its wrong :P
and here the link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSFMmkMfQ5Q
its been on for less than a day and already 60k+ viewers lol, it will take 2 mins watch it :P
and now i gtg peeps gl with ur exams :)
-
GOOD LUCK ABDO BUSINESS IS MY NEXT EXAM!! HEY DONT FORGET TO PRAY ISHA!!BYEZ!!
-
GOOD LUCK ABDO BUSINESS IS MY NEXT EXAM!! HEY DONT FORGET TO PRAY ISHA!!BYEZ!!
already done :P
i have geo tmr too :)
-
u have geo tom so off to bed...u have to have a good sleep :P :P :P
ukh people i was supposed to be off but then i took a shower and came back lol!!
-
I am really sorry people never meant to start a fight...lol!! it started between omer and I...lol!! and now everyone got involved... ;D
haha is okay shosh we take it as a joke, they play along as if its a real fight :P
and the wrong part is where it says boys will only want u for a week i garantee u its wrong :P
and here the link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSFMmkMfQ5Q
its been on for less than a day and already 60k+ viewers lol, it will take 2 mins watch it :P
and now i gtg peeps gl with ur exams :)
k thanks i'll watch in NOWWW ;)
i didnt say u wants a girl 4 only a week .. i said guys MADE UP THEIR MIND that she's gonna b his for atleast a week .. and then they might extend the period .. but wen they first say IT .. they just hav a week in mind ;D ;)
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haha!! funny twilight!!
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ooooooooooowwwwwwwwwww PPL
I REACHED THE 500TH POST 2 POSTS AGO
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
i didnt realise it!!! even though i was keeping it in mind 4 posts ago
-
haha!! funny twilight!!
lol !!! did u read the 2 pics in the previous page ?? hahahhahaaa
-
haha ya!! and congrats for the 500!! inshallah u will reach 600 soon!!
hey what exam do u have next??
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haha ya!! and congrats for the 500!! inshallah u will reach 600 soon!!
hey what exam do u have next??
thanksss ur the 1st to tl me congrats :-* luv ya
i hav economics AS on 5th june .. :( i'm freakin out :'( .. 7alleit all the papers on my own .. almodaresa meshyet abl mat5allas a5er 2 chapters and i did them on my own .. i hav loads of doubts but i'm stubborn and i'm not gonna call her after she abandoned teaching me !! i hate Herrrrrr >:( ana a5adt al mawdoo3 ta7addy and if i get a good grade i'm gonna call her and tell her i didnt need u .. ur nuthing imp
uhhhh.... wooohhh /.... thanks shush .. i let it all out .. i feel better :D :-*
-
eda begad??!! tyb khodi dares 3aned ai modarasa tania...ana fel accounting this is what happened bas i akhat daroos morag3a fel akher...and enti 3aiza takhshi eh???
and By the way do u watch star academy??
-
i actually screemed at her wen she told me "i hav no time 4 u and i hav another group" :-[
we aslan i wasnt going to take economics AS lawla enaha she told me if u take eco , i guarantee u'll get an A
garrabt modaresin ketir bas non of them bydareso this syllabus.. we they dont kno tari2et al examz we al tricks we keda we we2fo fi nfs al questions ally w2eft fihom :-\ .. fi modaresa tanya betdarres nfs alsyllabus .. shez teaching in my old skool .. heyya sa7bet almodaresa al2awalaneya .. we ba3d ma etafa2na 3ala ma3ad etasalet we alet enaha mash3'oola :-\
she pissed me off .. low kont fi masr kont la2eit million modares tany :-\.. bas insha2allah 5eir .. ana metwakela 3ala allah :)
pray 4 me ..
-
sa7 kalamek tawakali 3ala allah!! inshalla khair, rabena akeed ma3aki!! :)
-
hey guyz... yes Im back ... you know that urge that you get when ur studying to come on here ?
yeah well basically it was that urge that Bought me bak :P
And I have 2 poems left ....phewwww:P
-
yarab .. ally mraya7ny eny ba3mel ally 3alaya,..
i 4 got 2 answer ur question shushu ;) i wanna go into medical Uni in ALexandria .. insha2allahhh
-
heyyyyyy .. welcum bak roxy .... the thread is now gals ;)
-
loll... and congrats twilight ....!! :D
Have you had a party yet ? or shall we throw you one now ? :D
-
ROXYY!! after i said i am off i took a shower and went back to check what happened wid abdo, oh my god haha!!he was really killed...he pretended that he wasnt but haha!!
and twilight here lets make a party..lol!!
-
okzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ... lets PARTYYYYY ....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~ C E L E B R A T E ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`~~~~~~~~~~
By the way .. how many posts r left to get another star? wut wud be more than a geek??!!! lolzzz
-
WOHOOOOOOOOOO !!!!
CONGRATULATIONS TWILIGHT ON REACHING 500 POSTS !!! :D :D :D
[/font]
CAKE AND BALLLOOONS !!! 5OO BALLONS FROM ME :P
-
weeehhhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiii thankssoooooo ...
+rep for u gals
-
PARTY!! TWILIIGHT REACHED 500 PEOPLE!!
:-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
:-* :-* mwahhh ... luv ya gals
GROUP HUG
-
lol..:D
Group Hug.....:)
-
listen 2 this joke..
once 2 friends wer watching the news . it was broadcasting a guy that was gonna commit suicide by jumping off a bridge. so one frend told the other i bet u on 10 bucks that he will jump , the other agreed and betted on 10 bucks if he didnt jump. But the man jumped off the bridge,so the second friend handed the first friend 10 bucks .
the first frend said "sorry i cant take them"
second frend : why? it was a bet
first friend : bcoz i cheated u . i watched the news in the morning and i knew he wud jump
second friend: me too!! but i didnt think he wud do it again!!
-
hahahahahahah ...!!!!
nnyyyyyc ...:P
-
hey twilight
i realy thot udv red the saga
cus of ur name
twilight is addiction at first and it messes up everything
thn its liek .. wtf ??
new moon luks gud tho
whos givin lit By the way?
-
meee.....ukkkhhhh.. Im sig here finishing ooff the poems and I still have 2 novles and 1 shakespearean play !!
aaah ....
-
heyyyyy reshia oh my god u r soooooo funny people!! poor abdo!!
-
hey twilight
i realy thot udv red the saga
cus of ur name
twilight is addiction at first and it messes up everything
thn its liek .. wtf ??
new moon luks gud tho
whos givin lit By the way?
did u read the book itself ?? for twilight,i mean .. the movie missed out loads of nice stuff!!!
-
lol. where did you disappear to Mony ?
-
hey twilight
i realy thot udv red the saga
cus of ur name
twilight is addiction at first and it messes up everything
thn its liek .. wtf ??
new moon luks gud tho
whos givin lit By the way?
did u read the book itself ?? for twilight,i mean .. the movie missed out loads of nice stuff!!!
yea i red twilight , new moon , eclispse and breaking dawn well b4 the movie came out
and yea shou shou lol .. it ws cool tho ..
-
lol. where did you disappear to Mony ?
chattin wid my two best friends!!lol!! the one u saw today and spoke to her is one of them...and angel today sat the whole day wid us...
she also said that ur nice!! and she likes angel a lotttt!!
-
hey twilight
i realy thot udv red the saga
cus of ur name
twilight is addiction at first and it messes up everything
thn its liek .. wtf ??
new moon luks gud tho
whos givin lit By the way?
did u read the book itself ?? for twilight,i mean .. the movie missed out loads of nice stuff!!!
yea i red twilight , new moon , eclispse and breaking dawn well b4 the movie came out
and yea shou shou lol .. it ws cool tho ..
cool !! i downloaded them .. at the moment i am about to finish twilight , i downloaded it on my mob so i cud read in bed ;) ;D
i'll read the others in the holiday
-
hey twilight
i realy thot udv red the saga
cus of ur name
twilight is addiction at first and it messes up everything
thn its liek .. wtf ??
new moon luks gud tho
whos givin lit By the way?
did u read the book itself ?? for twilight,i mean .. the movie missed out loads of nice stuff!!!
yea i red twilight , new moon , eclispse and breaking dawn well b4 the movie came out
and yea shou shou lol .. it ws cool tho ..
cool !! i downloaded them .. at the moment i am about to finish twilight , i downloaded it on my mob so i cud read in bed ;) ;D
i'll read the others in the holiday
lol yea thyr fun to read
By the way dd u c de trailer??
JACOB BLACK IS HAAAAAWWWWWTTTTTTTTTT!!!
DRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLL!!
-
aww.... thats nyc of her :D
I didnt even get her name :P lolll... anywayz will she be there for the business exam ?
I'll meet you both of you, in fact all 3 of you there...
I didnt get a chance to see angell today ... so Ill probably see her on Thursday ..
-
and reisha.. where u from ?
-
hey twilight
i realy thot udv red the saga
cus of ur name
twilight is addiction at first and it messes up everything
thn its liek .. wtf ??
new moon luks gud tho
whos givin lit By the way?
did u read the book itself ?? for twilight,i mean .. the movie missed out loads of nice stuff!!!
yea i red twilight , new moon , eclispse and breaking dawn well b4 the movie came out
and yea shou shou lol .. it ws cool tho ..
cool !! i downloaded them .. at the moment i am about to finish twilight , i downloaded it on my mob so i cud read in bed ;) ;D
i'll read the others in the holiday
lol yea thyr fun to read
By the way dd u c de trailer??
JACOB BLACK IS HAAAAAWWWWWTTTTTTTTTT!!!
DRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLL!!
yeahhhh .. really hot .. i just watched the trailer 5 mins. ago ..
and omg ... did u see jasper .. he was gonna drink her blood
-
and reisha.. where u from ?
um smwher els ..
im guessin u guys r in jed
im in tabuk ...
and twilight
the scene is waaaaayyy bettr in the book
i hate kristen stwrt shes a stupid actress who cant stop blinking
-
oh i see..
lol. so are you called a Tabukian ...:P
-
oh i see..
lol. so are called a Tabukian ...:P
and proud!!
=D
lol no man
im happy as a pakistani
i hate tabukians
theyr messd in the hed big tym
-
lol. yeah... that was actually my question... ur nationality ...oh kay... cool .... :)
-
and reisha.. where u from ?
um smwher els ..
im guessin u guys r in jed
im in tabuk ...
and twilight
the scene is waaaaayyy bettr in the book
i hate kristen stwrt shes a stupid actress who cant stop blinking
nah .. i'm in bahrain not in jeddah .. i think they r ;) .. rite??
woooohhh .. ur making me wanna read it now !!! i'm luky i hav a long holiday 2 enjoy them ..
noohhooohhooo ... she's just perfect for this part .. and i think the blinking part is a part of the acting part
(i apologise for saying "part" so many times :D :D ;D ) ( i figured it out wen i finished the sentence ;D )
remember in the first book .. she said that she blinked so many times in the way she saw movie stars do??
-
lol. yeah... that was actually my question... ur nationality ...oh kay... cool .... :)
i knw ur pakistani and british ,,,
is it like one of ur parents r brit
or ur citizens??
-
and reisha.. where u from ?
um smwher els ..
im guessin u guys r in jed
im in tabuk ...
and twilight
the scene is waaaaayyy bettr in the book
i hate kristen stwrt shes a stupid actress who cant stop blinking
nah .. i'm in bahrain not in jeddah .. i think they r ;) .. rite??
woooohhh .. ur making me wanna read it now !!! i'm luky i hav a long holiday 2 enjoy them ..
noohhooohhooo ... she's just perfect for this part .. and i think the blinking part is a part of the acting part
(i apologise for saying "part" so many times :D :D ;D ) ( i figured it out wen i finished the sentence ;D )
remember in the first book .. she said that she blinked so many times in the way she saw movie stars do??
looooooooool
im sure its not wht shes trying to do
she luks retartd
evn robert pattinson is ok ...
the syd actors r professionals ..
-
um... well my story is kinda weird...
My grandfathers both moved to london like yeaaars back... and then teir kids (my parents, auntes and uncles)
were born and bought up there and then their kids (us and ma cuzonz) were all born in england... and thenwe moved to saudi about 9 years ago...
so thts my story... the rest of my family is back in london ...
so yeah ...:)
-
um... well my story is kinda weird...
My grandfathers both moved to london like yeaaars back... and then teir kids (my parents, auntes and uncles)
were born and bought up there and then their kids (us and ma cuzonz) were all born in england... and thenwe moved to saudi about 9 years ago...
so thts my story... the rest of my family is back in london ...
so yeah ...:)
cool ...so wut is ur nationality ORIGANALYY??
-
Oryt lovelys... I shall be off now ... I need to get sum sleep .. its almost 3 00 am!!!!
so Toodles...
:-*
-
bii
-
Oryt lovelys... I shall be off now ... I need to get sum sleep .. its almost 3 00 am!!!!
so Toodles...
:-*
bbye Take care :-*
-
bye ROXY!! she is originally pakistani but never went or visited Pakistan...lol!!
-
um... Im originally Paki ... but the problem is I cant speak urdu... and Ive never been to pakistan in my life ...
so if I tell ppl Im Paki.. they find it difficult to connect the two... cant speak the languae and has never been there.. hows tht possible...
so I tell em Im British Paki... more understandable.... :)
oryt Tooodles
xx
-
nice ... :D
-
ya she doesnt know urdu!! ii know more than her!!lol!!
-
loooooool
i got cuxns like tht
but my uncle made em lernt he language so theyl communicate witht ht rest of the family ..
lol thyr accent sounds sooo funny
-
lol ... yeah i can imagine that ..
i hav an italian cuin .. his dad is my uncle and his momz italian .. he lived all his life in italy and i saw him only wen he was like 25
he duznt speak arabic at all .. but wen he went to my grandma's my aunt(she's too funny) made him speak sum words .. he sounded so funny and cute .. lol !! :D
but sadly .. my uncle passed away suddenly a few months ago :'(
-
so ya people which nickname u liked for me??? Monica?? Shushou?? Sherry?? ;D
-
cool
hey shoushou
cud u tell me muliebrity in short ... like in 2 sentncs .. wht the hell it means?
-
what is muliebrity??
and twilight allah yar7amoo!!
-
so ya people which nickname u liked for me??? Monica?? Shushou?? Sherry?? ;D
i voted fr monica ...
sounded sophisticated ya noe ,,,
kinda like montisha frm the adams family
=P
-
thx sweety ..
i like shush
-
speakin about italiens...monica is the name of my cusion's wife..she is italien...lol!!
-
frget man frget
n twilight ... thts sad man .. condolenc :(
-
shush or shoshou?? ;D
-
speakin about italiens...monica is the name of my cusion's wife..she is italien...lol!!
haha
wow wer u inspired
-
:'( :'( i feel like i wanna cry .. i dunno y i remembered all this .. masada2t bada2t ansa :(
-
:'( :'( i feel like i wanna cry .. i dunno y i remembered all this .. masada2t bada2t ansa :(
i dint get half of wht u sed
but i get it
i lost an aunt tht ws very close to me
she taught me a lot
i just remember wht i lernt frm her
my auntie didnt go peacfully ...
its just life ... its aiit twilight ... ur not xpectd to b strong ...
-
:'( :'( i feel like i wanna cry .. i dunno y i remembered all this .. masada2t bada2t ansa :(
i dint get half of wht u sed
but i get it
i lost an aunt tht ws very close to me
she taught me a lot
i just remember wht i lernt frm her
my auntie didnt go peacfully ...
its just life ... its aiit twilight ... ur not xpectd to b strong ...
thanks reishamix :)
y am i not xpected 2 b strong??
-
speakin about italiens...monica is the name of my cusion's wife..she is italien...lol!!
haha
wow wer u inspired
well i tell u the story becuz everyone is askin abt it!! MONICA is christian and got married to my cousin who is really cute(just like me lol kiddin)
she was not able to get babies becuz of an accident when she was young..but after years of treatment with my cousin she brought a baby girl...he is a Muslim so they decided to let the girl to choose her own religion when she grows but then later she changed her mind and took the girl to the church...they had a fight and now they r gonna be divorced...when i heard the news two months back i was a bit shocked..at the same day i saw student forum so i just picked up the name that came to my mind monica..anythin just to enter the website i never thought ill be famous wid that name..lol!!
-
:'( :'( i feel like i wanna cry .. i dunno y i remembered all this .. masada2t bada2t ansa :(
i dint get half of wht u sed
but i get it
i lost an aunt tht ws very close to me
she taught me a lot
i just remember wht i lernt frm her
my auntie didnt go peacfully ...
its just life ... its aiit twilight ... ur not xpectd to b strong ...
thanks reishamix :)
y am i not xpected 2 b strong??
ok frget it
me and my frnds we talk abt all sorts of stuff
its complicated to xplain ..
umm ...
like ur human
ur not xpectd to hav a stone hart and not b emotional ...
see u need ppl around u whn ur a baby
and u need em whn ur old and need to b taken care of
wht ppl dont knw is
tht u also need ppl in between ..
hope it makes sens to u
-
:'( :'( i feel like i wanna cry .. i dunno y i remembered all this .. masada2t bada2t ansa :(
hey dont be sad!! howa fel makan el 2a7san inshallah!! ya benti begad he is in a better place...
-
:'( :'( i feel like i wanna cry .. i dunno y i remembered all this .. masada2t bada2t ansa :(
hey dont be sad!! howa fel makan el 2a7san inshallah!! ya benti begad he is in a better place...
well sed
hats off to u ..
-
By the way .. hw old r u ??
i found out ther r a lot of really yung ppl on the forums ..
-
:'( :'( i feel like i wanna cry .. i dunno y i remembered all this .. masada2t bada2t ansa :(
hey dont be sad!! howa fel makan el 2a7san inshallah!! ya benti begad he is in a better place...
yarab sweety .. i was so happy wen i knew eno kan 7agez yroo7 3omra before it happened.. but the hard part is the fora2 .. he saw me wen i was a baby .. and then again wen i was 12 .. the moment i saw him i knew him even before they told who he was .. i was surpised myself .. even though its only 5 years ago . but its like i knew him for ages
@reishamix .. yeah i get wut u mean ..
By the way.. he wasnt old .. he was perfectly yung and healthy .. its god's will
i'm gonna b 17 this year
-
:'( :'( i feel like i wanna cry .. i dunno y i remembered all this .. masada2t bada2t ansa :(
hey dont be sad!! howa fel makan el 2a7san inshallah!! ya benti begad he is in a better place...
yarab sweety .. i was so happy wen i knew eno kan 7agez yroo7 3omra before it happened.. but the hard part is the fora2 .. he saw me wen i was a baby .. and then again wen i was 12 .. the moment i saw him i knew him even before they told who he was .. i was surpised myself .. even though its only 5 years ago . but its like i knew him for ages
@reishamix .. yeah i get wut u mean ..
By the way.. he wasnt old .. he was perfectly yung and healthy .. its god's will
i'm gonna b 17 this year
thts not wht i ment ..
frget it thn ..
ur totally thinkn smthn els
-
i am 15 gonna be 16 next month...
akeed howa shakhes kawis....we eno we r speakin about him fel khair ya3ni malikat el arad bet7aboo..wagadet zi ma rasool(sallah allah 3alio wa salam) 2al.
-
hey reisha wat about u??
-
hey reisha wat about u??
um 16 ... my bday passd
-
i wanna sleep but i am waitin for fajir.....
-
i wanna sleep but i am waitin for fajir.....
lol me 2
-
monica is not ur name ???
omg.. i thiught it was
thn wuts ur REAL name?
alfjr azzan hna 3ndy
-
oh my god twilight!! i am Egyptian how come will my name be monica!!hahaha!!
-
lol ryt guys
um off
gbye!!
-
good night reshia!! :-* :-* :-*
-
oh my god twilight!! i am Egyptian how come will my name be monica!!hahaha!!
my sis has an egyptian frend named monica bas mesi7eyya ..3shn kda i wz surprised enk msh msi7eya we esmk monica
thn wut is ur real name?
-
ill pm it to u..thats why i changed it 3ashan kolo eftaker eni mase7ia..lol!!
-
Anyway gtg now!! everyone appears offline lol!!
There were two dogs barking in the street (dogs r never in jeddah) i don't know from where they came...they were barking like hell..i had to wake my mom up becuz i got scared lol!! she opened the window and threw on them a banana shell after eating it..lol. they got reallllly scared and ran away, although the shell didnt even touch them...lol!! ukhhh anyway good night people!! have a very good morning isa..bye.
-
It seems I missed alot, hope everything is okay guys, but had many things yestrerday.
Missing you
-
90 pages!! :o
-
How to know whether or not you are ready for kids
MESS TEST
Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.
TOY TEST
Obtain a 55 gallon box of Legos (or you may substitute roofing tacks). Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen.
Do not scream because this would wake a child at night.
GROCERY STORE TEST
Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.
DRESSING TEST
Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all the arms stay inside.
FEEDING TEST
Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water.
Suspend from the ceiling with a cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug on the floor.
NIGHT TEST
Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8-12 pounds of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 3:00p.m. begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9:00p.m. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10:00p.m.Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these too until 4:00a.m. Set alarm for 5:00a.m. Get up and make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.
INGENUITY TEST
Take an egg carton. Using a pair of scissors and pot of paint, turn it into an alligator. Now take a toilet paper tube and turn it into an attractive Christmas candle. Use only scotch tape and a piece of foil. Last, take a milk carton, a ping-pong ball, and an empty box of Cocoa Puffs. Make an exact replica of the Eiffel Tower.
AUTOMOBILE TEST
Forget the BMW and buy a station wagon. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there. Get a dime. Stick it into the cassette player. Take a family size package of chocolate chip cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car. There, perfect.
PHYSICAL TEST (Women)
Obtain a large bean bag chair and attach it to the front of your clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10 of the beans. And try not to notice your closet full of clothes. You won't be wearing them for a while.
PHYSICAL TEST (Men)
Go to the nearest drug store. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheque to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time.
FINAL ASSIGNMENT
Find a couple who already have a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training and child's table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasise to them that they should never allow their children to run wild. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you will have all the answers.
MUSIC TEST
On your expensive CD player and awesome speakers, play Britney Spears and Steps over and over again, very loud. Dance to it while looking happy. Take a good long look at your CD collection. You won't be hearing them for a long, long time.
In the car, play Postman Pat and Silly Songs Collection (for 3 - 6 year olds, Early Learning Centre) tapes for four hours while driving down the M5. Whatever you do don't play what YOU want. Sing along to the music in a traffic jam.
When relaxing and playing your own CDs (rare), suddenly put on a cheapo cassette player in the room playing Aqua's Barbie Girl. Turn off your CD and walk out of the room. Move on to Mess Test II.
MESS TEST II
After spending two hours cleaning the house, put rags and old shoes in the hallway by the front door. Leave pieces of cloth on the stairs in a pleasing random fashion. Pick them all up and put them in a wooden box. Do the same thing everyday for ten years.
BOOK TEST
Spend at least fifty pounds on expensive picture books. Draw in them in indelible pen and leave them in the garden. Make sure it's raining. Smile and tut affectionately to your self.
-
Airport Security Problems !
London
17th August
A public school teacher was arrested today at Gatwick Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Home Secretary John Reid said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the Met. Police with carrying weapons of maths instruction. "Al-gebra is a problem for us," Reid said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute values. They use secret code names like "x" and "y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns," but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with co-ordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle".
When asked to comment on the arrest, Prime Minister Tony Blair, speaking from his holiday resort before the planes stopped flying, said, "If God had wanted us to have better Weapons of Maths Instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."
-
It seems I missed alot, hope everything is okay guys, but had many things yestrerday.
Missing you
HEY SWEETSH!! u missed the big fight girl!!lol!! we missed u too!! :-* :-* :-*
-
start a new one ? :P jk
-
hahaha.... didnt u learn a lesson from yesterday??!! of course u have to be jokin :P :P :P
-
ya ya,
i learned my lesson, never annoy a girl, cause she has an army of chatterboxes behind her ready to attack u :P lol
-
haha...ya right!! where is Sweetsh?? ???
-
ya ya,
i learned my lesson, never annoy a girl, cause she has an army of chatterboxes behind her ready to attack u :P lol
:O what happened??
-
ya ya,
i learned my lesson, never annoy a girl, cause she has an army of chatterboxes behind her ready to attack u :P lol
:O what happened??
??
i was annoying shosho :P :P :P
-
no he wasn't annoying me but he was admitting that he learned his lesson!! :P :P :P
-
A Blonde At The Doctors
A blonde told her doctor that she was really worried because every part of her body hurt.
The doctor looked concerned and said, "Show me where."
The blonde touched her own arm and screamed, "Ouch!"
Then she touched her leg and screamed, "Ouch!"
She touched her nose and cried, "Ouch!"
She looked at her doctor and said, "See? It hurts everywhere!"
The doctor laughed and said, "Don't worry; it's not serious. You've just got a broken finger."
i hope ur not blonde shosho, cause im attacking blondes from now on :P
-
hahahaha!! noo i am not blonde...but my sister is kind of >:( >:( >:(
-
10 blondes and a red head
11 women were clinging precariously to a wildly swinging rope suspended from a crumbling outcropping on Mount Everest. Ten were blonde, one was a red head.
As a group they decided that one of the party should let go. If that didn't happen the rope would break and everyone would perish. For an agonising few moments no one volunteered.
Finally the red head gave a truly touching speech saying she would sacrifice herself to save the lives of the others.
The blondes applauded.
(then ur sis must not come near this thread :P)
-
i don't know y do people think blondes r stupid...my sister is not really blonde but kind of..and she is smart she got A and A* in her Igcse and she is a physiotherapist now... :-\
-
i don't know y do people think blondes r stupid...my sister is not really blonde but kind of..and she is smart she got A and A* in her Igcse and she is a physiotherapist now... :-\
lol, cause ur sis is not american i guess :P
well, they ARE only jokes, all the jokes about women yesterday wer'nt true, or where they ?? now thats the question :P
-
of course they were not true!! :P
and u make fun of blondes but when u see them u fall on the floor...like here in jeddah when a blond is walking in the street people(meaning men) keep on staring like hell, i feel sorry......lol!!
-
of course they were not true!! :P
and u make fun of blondes but when u see them u fall on the floor...like here in jeddah when a blond is walking in the street people(meaning men) keep on staring like hell, i feel sorry......lol!!
lol, blondes make me feel weird, i prefer red heads :P
-
haha..red heads r cool...lol!!
anyways i will go study business and come back later....byez!!
:P :P :P :P :P
-
best of luck,
bye
-
AM BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!
I CAN'T BELIVE YOU GUYS ATUALLY WENT AHEAD WITH 19 PAGES WITHOUT ME!
AND I CAN'T BELIEVE I SPENT ALMOST AN ENTIRE HOUR TRYING TO CATCH UP, SO HERES A SUMMER OF MY COMMENTS:
About Guys VS Gals: Me and Monica started it (with me getting ocassional backup from abdo and yusef and some traitor whose nickname starts with a and ends with s helped sh****** (u noe hu am talkin about),), and as expected (27im, 27im), we ran over the gals who kept clinging that the Traitor was a "fact" enough to let them win. Anyways, it was friendly and i'm sure we were all laughing throughout the whole convo, but i think that after me and yusef left, some people (abdo, and cryps, and reisha too i think) started taking it too personal. Guys (and gals), this is a forum, a place to make friends, the whole debate was just like a joke, don't be too cynical (i think thats what created the whole problem, being cynical), all of you people in here are very nice and friendly people, lets keep it this way, and if you wanna enter another fight/debate, make sure you don't take things personally (it was pretty darn fun at the beginning).
And hey, Yusef, don't let these gals intimidate you just cause they're a bunch of chatterboxes, us two can take them all out AGAIn, its not about the quantity of words, its about the quality!
(p.s. about the Twilight movie, what kind of movies or novels make vampires "sun-shine daisies" , i didn't get to watch the movie yet, but every one is saying that it is the stupidest movie in history of vampire movies)
(p.s.2. all movies that are based on books completely suck if you compare them to the books. They take out little parts of the book, forgetting that these little parts are what makes that novel so special, and sometimes they actually change a part of the book; closes thing to a good movie)
(p.s.3. congratulation twilight for you 500th post)
(p.s.4 @Shoushu, (i'm talking in general, not trying to have a cheap shot at anyone) blondes aren't really dumb, they just think they beautiful and use their beauty to get what they want, instead of earning what they want using hard work and brains)
(p.s.5 (don't worry, this is the last p.s. :P) thanks for the good luck wishes, good luck to ya'll too)
-
This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.
There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it.
Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it.
Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job.
Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it.
It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done
well this isnt dat funny but i found it pretty amusing!
-
so who did the important job afterall ?? :P
-
so who did the important job afterall ?? :P
guess nobody!!!!
here is another not that funny thing
Doctors: What They Say & What They Really Mean
"This should be taken care of right away."
"I'd planned a trip to Hawaii next month but this is
so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures
itself."
"Welllllll, what have we here..."
Since he hasn't the foggiest notion of what it is, the
Doctor is hoping you will give him a clue.
"We'll see."
"First I have to check my malpractice insurance."
"Let me check your medical history."
"I want to see if you've paid your last bill before
spending any more time with you."
"Why don't we make another appointment later in the week."
"I'm playing golf this afternoon, and this a waste of time."
-or-
"I need the money, so I'm charging you for another
office visit."
"I really can't recommend seeing a chiropractor."
"I hate those guys mooching in on our fees."
"Hmmmmmmmm."
Since he hasn't the faintest idea of what to do, he is
trying to appear thoughtful while hoping the nurse will
interrupt. (Proctologist also say this a lot.)
"We have some good news and some bad news."
The good news is he's going to buy that new BMW, and
the bad news is you're going to pay for it.
"Let's see how it develops."
"Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that
can be cured."
"Let me schedule you for some tests."
"I have a 40% interest in the lab."
"How are we today?"
"I feel great. You, on the other hand, look like hell."
"I'd like to prescribe a new drug."
"I'm writing a paper and would like to use you for a
guinea pig."
"If it doesn't clear up in a week, give me a call."
"I don't know what the hell it is. Maybe it will go
away by itself."
"That's quite a nasty looking wound."
"I think I'm going to throw up."
"This may smart a little."
"Last week two patients bit through their tongues."
"This should fix you up."
"The drug salesman guaranteed that it kills all
symptoms."
"Everything seems to be normal."
"I guess I can't buy that new beach condo after all."
"I'd like to run some more tests."
"I can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe the kid in the
lab can solve this one."
"Do you suppose all of this stress could be affecting
your nerves?"
He thinks you are crazy and is hoping to find a
psychiatrist who will split fees.
"If those symptoms persist, call for an appointment."
"I've never heard of anything so disgusting. Thank God
I'm off next week.
-
well this is a little thing about the rules of english language(no rudeness inteneded)
The Funny English Language
No wonder the English language is so very difficult to learn.
I sometimes wonder how we manage to communicate at all!
We'll begin with a box and the plural is boxes.
But the plural of ox should be oxen, not oxes.
The one fowl is a goose but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may found a lone mouse or a whole set of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of a foot and you show me your feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why should not the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural wouldn't be hose.
And the plural of cat is cats and not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say Mother, we never say Methren,
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine she, shis and shim,
So English, I fancy you will all agree,
Is the funniest language you ever did see.
-
AM BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!
I CAN'T BELIVE YOU GUYS ATUALLY WENT AHEAD WITH 19 PAGES WITHOUT ME!
AND I CAN'T BELIEVE I SPENT ALMOST AN ENTIRE HOUR TRYING TO CATCH UP, SO HERES A SUMMER OF MY COMMENTS:
About Guys VS Gals: Me and Monica started it (with me getting ocassional backup from abdo and yusef and some traitor whose nickname starts with a and ends with s helped sh****** (u noe hu am talkin about),), and as expected (27im, 27im), we ran over the gals who kept clinging that the Traitor was a "fact" enough to let them win. Anyways, it was friendly and i'm sure we were all laughing throughout the whole convo, but i think that after me and yusef left, some people (abdo, and cryps, and reisha too i think) started taking it too personal. Guys (and gals), this is a forum, a place to make friends, the whole debate was just like a joke, don't be too cynical (i think thats what created the whole problem, being cynical), all of you people in here are very nice and friendly people, lets keep it this way, and if you wanna enter another fight/debate, make sure you don't take things personally (it was pretty darn fun at the beginning).
And hey, Yusef, don't let these gals intimidate you just cause they're a bunch of chatterboxes, us two can take them all out AGAIn, its not about the quantity of words, its about the quality!
(p.s. about the Twilight movie, what kind of movies or novels make vampires "sun-shine daisies" , i didn't get to watch the movie yet, but every one is saying that it is the stupidest movie in history of vampire movies)
(p.s.2. all movies that are based on books completely suck if you compare them to the books. They take out little parts of the book, forgetting that these little parts are what makes that novel so special, and sometimes they actually change a part of the book; closes thing to a good movie)
(p.s.3. congratulation twilight for you 500th post)
(p.s.4 @Shoushu, (i'm talking in general, not trying to have a cheap shot at anyone) blondes aren't really dumb, they just think they beautiful and use their beauty to get what they want, instead of earning what they want using hard work and brains)
(p.s.5 (don't worry, this is the last p.s. :P) thanks for the good luck wishes, good luck to ya'll too)
I AGREE 100% WITH U!! We were all jokin, its the jokes threads after all!! GROUP HUG!! lol!!
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Group Hug =]
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Group Hug =]
OH SWEETSH!! U ALAWYS JOIN IN THE GOOD TIMES(GROUP HUGS) LOL!! HAHA!!KISSES TO ALL!!
and where have u been?? I really missed u...i needed u yesterday... :'( :'( :'(
lol!!
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I was busy tidying up my messy room.
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sweetsh............ur sig. ?????????????
u leavin???
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what da hell????!! SWEETSH UR LEAVIN?? NO WAY!! SWEEEETSH!!
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OH MY GOD SWEETSH :o :o :o NO WAY!! COME ON SAY SUMTHIN..U JUST CANT LEAVE??!!! WAT HAPPEND!!
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i thought i was the last one to know......
i guess we will all make the same decision some time....we can stay here 4ever :-[
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SWEETSH?? WHERE R U?? COME ON....WAT DECISION U TOOK..JUST FORGET IT....SF IS UR PLACE....SWEETSH :'(
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(late) GROUP HUG!
and shush, unless sweetsh is offline, i think shes kinda "enjoying" your anxiety, i don't think she gonna leave the forum, the sig probably refers to something else, mayhbe her school or something
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no i think she is serious, she said SF( meaning student forum) :( she just cant leave...
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no i think she is serious, she said SF( meaning student forum) :( she just cant leave...
maybe shes just travelling lol
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even if she is traveling y would she leave SF?? :( :( :(
ukhh this is annoying :'( :'( :'(
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OMG ...!!!
SWEETSH IS LEAVING !?!
NO, IT DUSNT MAKE SENSE......!!!
SWEETSH MAN.... UR THE HEAD OF THIS ... U CANT GAL .!!!
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hey Roxy glad u joined :'(
sweetsh...ur not online on the messenger and ur not online in SF..come on..what happened??
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y did i have to read her sig and get u annoyed......:S
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YES U R THE REASON, UR THE ONE WHO READ THE SIGN >:( >:( >:( >:(
NOW I CANT STUDY BUSINESS!! >:(
SWEETSH.... :'( :'( :'(
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shosho ur offline, or hiding, how do u do that lol ?
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shosho ur offline, or hiding, how do u do that lol ?
waaaaaaaaaaaaa2, sweetsh is the one who teached me this.....now i am remembering the good days.....abdo ur not helpin waaaaaaaa2 :'( :'(
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lol.
okay guyz I seriously have to go now... ND Ill cach uo with yall laterz ia ..
sorry but I just woke up a hour ago and I havent touchwd business ..!!!
can u believe me !?!
bloody hell... I cant believe My slf ! :P
Toodles.... :-*
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i know shosh but theres nothing i can do :(
and how do u hide?
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so what happened ??
did she leave 5ala9 ??
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i dont think so, shes an admin and if she left someone like astar would prob know?
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and astar doesnt know ?
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no one knew till i brought it out....
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calm down shush, i'm sure she gonna answer you when she comes,
and it could be like what snitty said, she might just be going off for a vacation or something
and again, just like snitty said, we are gonna leave this forum sooner or later, but i am not expecting to leave this place until at least after i apply and get accepted to college (inshallah)
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if she leaves, there will only be 1 adminstrator (astar),
the rest rarely online, what will happen ??
the forums will collapse, sweetsh is one of the main bricks !!
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thx omer... but sweetsh is an important person..just like what Q80 said, i dont expect her to leave....
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so ...
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sooo... r u don't studying for business ?
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i dont take business *thanking god*
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oooooh ur sum lukkky duuudde mate !!!!!
oryt then. I betta get off... so
Toodles guyz....
cya after 1 past paper ..:P
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oh well, i just guess that if no one else minds....
lets continue with the jokes and riddles
this IS the jokes and riddles thread afterall
as i understand, sherry already pm-ed her, so she can tell us in case of any updates
@roxy: peace
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best of luck :)
that was my 1400 post ;D (AGAIN >:( - someone must have deleted a topic or something)
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i don't take biznes either :P
lol, i remember even when u crossed the 1000th post, u crossed it like three times
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lol ya,
oh well *sighs*
any funny jokes ??
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ok, ama dish out some riddles in a bit (i know some sudani jokes, but i guess ya'll won't get it :P)
ok heres one:
Some try to hide, some try to cheat, but time will show, we always will meet. Try as you might, to guess my name, I promise you'll know, when you I do claim. Who am I?
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death?
grim reaper? lol
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death !!
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k, heres another one:
Hands she has but does not hold, teeth she has but does not bite, feet she has but they are cold, eyes she has but without sight. Who is she?
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a barbie ...?
a toy doll ..?
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The mirror??!!
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lol..
oryt wot about this 1
You use it between ur head and the tip of ur toes, the more it works the thinner ir grows. Wat is it?
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thnxxx whoever +repped me :D
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lol..
oryt wot about this 1
You use it between ur head and the tip of ur toes, the more it works the thinner ir grows. Wat is it?
SOAP!! i told u ill try make u like mine ;) ;)
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awww...!!! Thanks :D :-*
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hey is it soap??!!
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a barbie ...?
a toy doll ..?
WE HAVE A WINNER !!
your'e prize: a limited edition aston martin DBS, you can pick it up from ur nearest aston martin dealership (terms and conditions apply)
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lol..
oryt wot about this 1
You use it between ur head and the tip of ur toes, the more it works the thinner ir grows. Wat is it?
nerves......:P <<<studying biology no doubt :P :D
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NOW PEOPLE I REALLY GOT TO GO!! i have business tom inshallah....all the best for everyone!! Dont post anything in my thread without me >:(
lol!! JUST KIDDIN, POST AS U LIKE!! BYE!! :-* :-* :-*
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Goup hug and kiss
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GROOOOUP HUG AND KISSES :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
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yaaay !!! im winnner !!!! :D :D :D
So is mony ..! Mony ur a winner.. u answerdma question ..!! :D
+REP 4 U
and good luck studying ...:D
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hey guys,
did u know that this topic is the top by replies !! its the most topic with replies on the whole forum !!
congrats shosho !! thats a great acheivement ;)
thanks :)
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hahaha thats good, "group hug and kisses" :P
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and now i have to go study bus. then tmr lit and physics... :/
By the way how do we appear hidden ??
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lollll...!!!!
wow...
grou hug !!
GUYZZZ I CCANT STUDDDY !!!!
someone help me...wot shall I do last minuite ????
omg... its like IVE got a business exam 2morrow and I havnt even don't ANYTHINGGGG !!
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hey guys,
did u know that this topic is the top by replies !! its the most topic with replies on the whole forum !!
congrats shosho !! thats a great acheivement ;)
thanks :)
WOW!! REALLY??!! OH YA GREAT ACHIEVEMENT ALL THANKS TO UR POSTS AND NICE JOKES THAT MADE US ALL LAUGH... THE PURPOSE OF THIS THREAD TO MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY!! I AM HAPPY AS LONG AS U R PEOPLE :'( (some soundtracks plz i am giving my speech it should be emtional :P) lol!! I AM REALLY GLAD!!
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Roxy guess what??!! i havent start yet, dont worry u still have 5 hours till bed...just revise quickly the book and then go and read all the answers to ur past papers..thats wat i am going to do inshallah!! dont worry and dont panic it happened to me before(its happening now also lol) but then u still have lots of time and u already revised for paper 1..so just quick revision. :) :)
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I love you all guys I have to go now. Take care and talk to you later..
Group Hug and Kisses =*
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I LOVE EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN THIS WEBSITE!!! THATS Y I CANT STUDY :'(...
BIG GROUP HUG PLEASE!! :-* :-* :-*
I LOVE U SWEETSH AND ROXY!!! :-* :-* :-*
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lol. Thanks mny for the tips.. I think I shall do tht.. :D
And I love every1 here too... I think thts why havnt started studying either ....
so big hug and a Kiss every1 :D :-*
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Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. 'Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!'
'But why, Mom? I don't want to go.'
'Give me two reasons why you don't want to go.'
'Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!'
'Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready.'
'Give me two reasons why I should go to school.'
'Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the Principal!
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lolll.. nyyyc.:P
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hahahahaha!! KIM!! This is sooooo funny!! hahaha!!
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The boss who was on the 25th floor of the building called up the clerk on the ground floor for an important file. Since it was rather urgent the boss told the clerk it was an emergency and that he should hurry with the file.
After more than 30 minutes the clerk appears all tired and panting for breath.
The Boss asks him why he was panting and what caused the huge delay.
The clerk replies, 'Boss when I went to the lift it said 'during an emergency please use the staircase'!!!
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haha..wat a stupid clerk...lol!!
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The little boy was sitting on a park bench munching on one chocolate bar after another. After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, 'Son, you know eating all those chocolates isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, make you fat.'
The boy replied, 'My grandfather lived to be 107 years old.'
The man asked, 'Did your grandfather eat 6 chocolate bars at a time?'
The little boy answered, 'No, he minded his own damn business!'
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hehe :P
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Am baaaack!
guessing everyone left for biznes, good luck everyone :)
and hey kim, nice jokes, keep em coming, +Rep :)
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haha funny... :D
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Do You Really Have To Be Smart To Be A Lawyer?
It must be such a relief for you to find out it's not only Football Commentators who say the stupidest things !
Recently reported in the Massachusetts Bar Association Lawyers' Journal, the following are questions actually asked of witnesses by attorneys during trials and, in certain cases, the responses given by insightful witnesses:
"Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?"
"The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?"
"Were you present when your picture was taken?"
Q: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
A: "No."
Q: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
A: "No."
Q: "Did you check for breathing?"
A: "No."
Q: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
A: "No."
Q: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
A: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
Q: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
A: "It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."
"Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?"
"Did he kill you?"
"How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?"
"You were there until the time you left, is that true?"
"How many times have you committed suicide?"
Q: "So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And what were you doing at that time?"
Q: "She had three children, right?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "How many were boys?"
A: "None."
Q: "Were there any girls?"
Q: "You say the stairs went down to the basement?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"
Q: "Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn't you?"
A: "I went to Europe, Sir."
Q: "And you took your new wife?"
Q: "How was your first marriage terminated?"
A: "By death."
Q: "And by who's death was it terminated?"
Q: "Can you describe the individual?"
A: "He was about medium height and had a beard."
Q: "Was this a male, or a female?"
Q: "Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?"
A: "No, this is how I dress when I go to work."
Q: "Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?"
A: "All my autopsies are performed on dead people."
Q: "All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?"
A: "Oral."
Q: "Do you recall the time that you examined the body?"
A: "The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.."
Q: "And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?"
A: "No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy."
Q: "You were not shot in the fracas?"
A: "No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel."
Q: "Are you qualified to give a urine sample?"
A: "I have been since early childhood.
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oh wait, thats not the whole thing, lemme grab the rest....
From a little book called “Disorder in the Court.”
They’re things people actually said in court, word for word.
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteen.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
—————————————————
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
—————————————————
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you’ve forgotten?
—————————————————
Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.
—————————————————
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
A: He said, “Where am I, Cathy?”
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
—————————————————
Q: And where was the location of the accident?
A: Approximately milepost 499.
Q: And where is milepost 499?
A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500.
—————————————————
Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.
—————————————————
Q: Did you blow your horn or anything?
A: After the accident?
Q: Before the accident.
A: Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.
—————————————————
Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
A: Yes.
Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
A: Yes, sir.
Q: What did she say?
A: What disco am I at?
—————————————————
Q: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about
it until the next morning?
—————————————————
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?
—————————————————
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
—————————————————
Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?
—————————————————
Q: Did he kill you?
—————————————————
Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?
—————————————————
Q: You were there until the time you left, is that true?
—————————————————
Q: How many times have you committed suicide?
—————————————————
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
—————————————————
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
—————————————————
Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?
————————————————–
Q: Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn’t you?
A: I went to Europe, Sir.
Q: And you took your new wife?
—————————————————
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
—————————————————
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?
—————————————————
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice
which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
—————————————————
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
—————————————————
Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
—————————————————
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an
autopsy.
—————————————————
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
—————————————————
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began
the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
—————————————————
Q: You were not shot in the fracas?
A: No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel.
ENJOY!
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haha lol, this is so funny lol, worth reading :P
Grandma is eighty-eight years old and still drives her own car.
She writes:
Dear Grand-daughter,
The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a ‘Honk if you love Jesus’ bumper sticker ..
I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting..
So, I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.
Boy, am I glad I did; what an uplifting experience that followed.
I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good he is, and I didn’t notice that the light had changed.
It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn’t honked, I’d never have noticed.
I found that lots of people love Jesus!
While I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, ‘For the love of God!’
‘Go! Go! Go! Jesus Christ, GO!’
What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!
Everyone started honking! and I just leaned out my window and started waving and smiling at all those loving people.
I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!
There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a sunny beach.
I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air.
I asked my young teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant.
He said it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something.
Well, I have never met anyone from Hawaii , so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign right back.
My grandson burst out laughing.
Why even he was enjoying this religious experience!!
A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me.
I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed.
So, grinning, I waved at all my brothers and sisters, and drove on through the intersection.
I noticed that I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared.
So I slowed the car down, leaned out the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away. Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!!
Will write again soon,
Love, Grandma
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hahaha!!
-
hahaha!!
lol shosh y are u offline ?
and how do u do it i wanna know ?? :P
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haha!! ur askin this question for the 4th time today!! i wont tell u :P :P :P
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SOMEBODY'S ON A RAMPAGE (By the way, i edited my previous reply in the last page, check it if u didn't already)
QUestions That Will Always Confuse Mankind
When people say, "I’m so tired it's not even funny" or "my head hurts so much it's not even funny", why would it even be funny in the first place?
Do stairs go up or down?
Why is there a top line on lined paper if we never use it?
Do coffins have lifetime guarantees?
Why do the numbers on phones go down while the numbers on calculators go up?
If Hooters were to become a door-to-door service would they have to change
their name to Knockers?
If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?
Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
Can you make a candle out of your earwax?
When French people swear do they say pardon my English?
Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers from the people that got there first?
If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?
Can a fire truck park in the fire lane?
Can it be cloudy and foggy at the same time?
"Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute?
Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time?
Are marbles made of marble?
Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?
If you pay for a vacation and your plane crashes on the way there, do you get you money back? (Granted you lived)
Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?
Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?
Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
Can you get cornered in a round room?
Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?
Why don't the hairs on your arms get split ends?
If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?
Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?
In that song, she'll be coming around the mountain, who is she?
How come we say 'It's colder than hell outside' when isn't it realistically always colder than hell since hell is supposed to be fire and brimstone?
Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it becomes extra tempting to eat?
Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?
Wouldn't it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?
Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable but not on regular television? Don't they want the people without cable to buy the cable?
"Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?"
Isn't it funny how the word 'politics'
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haha!! ur askin this question for the 4th time today!! i wont tell u :P :P :P
lmao whyyy :O
-
that was so funny i couldnt stop laughing the whole time omg and i m not supposed to be here i should be studing physics but this forum is addicting ;D
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haha i totally agree wid Kim...+rep for u by da way...
@abdo i am kiddin ill tell u later becuz i gtg :P(i said i gtg today like 5 times or sumthin) but i mean it this time inshallah..lol!!
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that was so funny i couldnt stop laughing the whole time omg and i m not supposed to be here i should be studing physics but this forum is addicting ;D
lol crap i took a rest and said ill go back to study, that was 21 minutes ago -.-
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haha i totally agree wid Kim...+rep for u by da way...
@abdo i am kiddin ill tell u later becuz i gtg :P(i said i gtg today like 5 times or sumthin) but i mean it this time inshallah..lol!!
alright then send me a message or something when ur free, i gtg study bus again :P
then lit and physics -.-
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haha i totally agree wid Kim...+rep for u by da way...
@abdo i am kiddin ill tell u later becuz i gtg :P(i said i gtg today like 5 times or sumthin) but i mean it this time inshallah..lol!!
alright then send me a message or something when ur free, i gtg study bus again :P
then lit and physics -.-
ok deal and good luck!! :)
-
yea kim's ryte, but i am thinking about it this way: just memorize the formulas today, and don't forget most people r studyng for biznes, so u wont be the only one squeezing physics in one day
AND NOW EVEN MORE JOKES
Insults ....
•I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse!
•Roses are red violets are blue, God made me pretty, what the hell happen to you?
•Right now I'm sitting here looking at you trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my A**.
•A pretty girl can kiss a guy* a bird can kiss a butterfly* the rising sun can kiss the grass* but you my friend!! yes you!! YOU CAN KISS MY A*********
•If you didn't have feet you wouldn't wear shoes.....then why do you wear a bra??!
•mirrors don't talk but lucky for you %n they don't laugh
•Poof be gone, your breath is too strong, I don't wanna be mean, but you need listerine, not a sip, not a swallow, but the whole friggin bottle
•People like you are the reason I'm on medication.
•Don't piss me off today, I'm running out of places to hide to bodies
•I have always woundered why people bang their heads against brick walls..... then I met you. Don't bother leaving a message.
•Don't let your mind wander. It's way to small to be outside by itself!
•I had a nightmare. I dreamt I was you.
•Hey, Remember that time I told you I thought you were cool? I LIED.
•I need you...........I want you............To get out of my face
•Damn not you again.......
•Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but you abuse the privilege.
•If I wanted to talk to you, I would have called you first.
•I am not anti-social..I just don't like you
•If you're gonna act like a d*ck you should wear a condom on your head so you can at least look like one !!!
•Hmm...I dont know what your probelm is...but I'm going to bet it's really hard to pronounce...
•There are some stupid people in this world. You just helped me realize it.
•Until you called me I couldn't remember the last time I wanted somebody's fingers to break so badly.
•If you ran 1,000,000 miles to see the boy/girl of your dreams, what would you say when you got there?
Wow, you looked a lot hotter from a distance!
•Cancel my subscriptions ... I'm tired of your issues.
•I may be fat,but you're ugly,and I can diet!!!
•Earth is full. Go home.
•If I could be one person for a day, it sure as hell wouldn't be you.
•Hey, heres a hint. If i don't answer you the first 25 times, what makes you think the next 25 will work?
•How do you keep an idiot in suspense? Leave a message and I'll get back to you...
•Oh dear! Looks like you fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down!
•What's that ugly thing growing out of your neck... Oh... It's your head...
•I'm sorry, Talking to you seems as appealing as playing leapfrog with unicorns.
•Oh I'm sorry, how many times did your parents drop you when you were a baby?
•Don't hate me because I'm beautiful hate me because your boyfriend thinks so.
•God made mountains, god made trees, god made you but we all make mistakes.
•Remember JESUS loves you but everyone else thinks you're an idiot.
•I'm not mean ... you're just a sissy.
•Sorry I can't think of an insult stupid enough for you.
•Why don't you go outside any play, hide and go f**k yourself
•Beauty is skin deep, but ugly is to the bone
•How about a little less questions and a little more shut the hell up? I'm away live with it.
•FOR THE LAST TIME! Your mother left here at 9 this morning... Leave me alone!
•Let's see, I've walked the dog, cleaned my room, gone shopping and gossiped with my friends...Nope,
this list doesn't say that I'm required to talk to you.
•When you were born you were so ugly that instead of slapping you, the doctor slapped your mom! leave a message
•My Mom said never talk to strangers and well, since you're really strange.... I guess that means I can't talk to you!
•Forget the ugly stick! you must have been born in the ugly forrest!
•I really don't like you but if you really must leave a message, I'll be nice and at least pretend to care.
•You know the drill! You leave a message....and I ignore it!
•The Village just called. They said they were missing their town idiot, I couldn't really understand them, but I think they were saying the name was yours...
•I'm not here right now so cry me a river, build yourself a bridge, and GET OVER IT!!!
•Why are you bothering me? I have my away message on cause I don't want to listen to you and your stupid nonsense.
•You dont know me, you just wish you did.
•Hey- I am away from my computer but in the meantime, why don't you go play in traffic?!
•You have your whole life to be a jerk....so why dont you take a day off so.. leave me a message for when I get back!!!!
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so wut, the one time i go rampage in jokes no one else is online?
AW THAT JUST SUCKS!
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so wut, the one time i go rampage in jokes no one else is online?
AW THAT JUST SUCKS!
haha!! ok i read half ur insults hahahaha!! wat is this(enta keda bet3alem el nas el 3onf :Phaha) and i am off now... :P :P :P
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lol, actually i got em from a friend,
and he is quite....um..... a complete CLOWN, he is such a clown i say in his face and he doesn't mind it lol
um, anyways
3nf shino di turuq difa3 3an an nafs (hope u got what i said lol)
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some pretty insulting insults :P
would love having them on t-shirts, maybe this summer :D
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After the beep
Actual Answering Machine Messages Recorded and Verified By The World Famous International Institute of Answering Machine Messages:
10. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity at the office and don't need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and home phone number and they will get back to you.
8. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your number, and your reason for calling.... and I'll think about returning your call.
7. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
6. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my bank, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have LOTS of money.
5. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So, leave a message.
4. Hello! If you leave a message, I'll call you soon. If you leave a "sexy" message, I'll call sooner.
3. Hi. Now YOU say something.
2. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
And the Number 1 Actual Answering Machine Message Recorded and Verified by The World Famous International Institute of Answering Machine Messages.
1. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll call you back.
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and maybe i can make a biznes outta theese shirts
*bulb lights up*
HEY THATSA GREAT IDEA THANK YOU YUSEF!
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A man walks into a pharmacy, buys a condom, then walks out of the store
laughing hysterically. The pharmacist thinks this is weird, but, hey, there's
no law preventing weird people from buying condoms. Maybe it's a good thing.
The next day, the man comes back to the store, purchases another condom, and
once again he leaves the store laughing wildly. This piques the interest of
the pharmacist. What's so funny about buying a rubber, anyway?
So he tells his clerk, "If this guy ever comes back, I want you to follow him
to see where he goes."
Sure enough, the next day the laugher is back. He buys the condom, starts
cracking up, then leaves. The pharmacist tells his clerk to go follow the
guy.
About an hour later, the clerk comes back to the store.
"Did you follow him? Where did he go?" asks the pharmacist.
The clerk replies "Your house."
hope its not overrated :D lol
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haha Q80 on T-shirts hahahaha..
and omer yes i got wat u said ya zool :P
now i really gtg(6th time) but i mean it this time(3rd time) Byezzz(hundreds of time)
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Alligators in the Pool
A CEO throwing a party takes his executives on a tour of his opulent mansion. In the back of the property, the CEO has the largest swimming pool any of them has ever seen.
The huge pool, however, is filled with hungry alligators.
The CEO says to his executives "I think an executive should be measured by courage. Courage is what made me CEO. So this is my challenge to each of you: if anyone has enough courage to dive into the pool, swim through those alligators, and make it to the other side, I will give that person anything they desire. My job, my money, my house, anything!"
Everyone laughs at the outrageous offer and proceeds to follow the CEO on the tour of the estate. Suddenly, they hear a loud splash. Everyone turns around and sees the CFO (Chief Financial Officer) in the pool, swimming for his life. He dodges the alligators left and right and makes it to the edge of the pool with seconds to spare. He pulls himself out just as a huge alligator snaps at his shoes.
The flabbergasted CEO approaches the CFO and says, "You are amazing. I've never seen anything like it in my life. You are brave beyond measure and anything I own is yours. Tell me what I can do for you.
The CFO, panting for breath, looks up and says, "You can tell me who the hell pushed me in the pool!"
Egyptians will remember this one, cuz we have this one in arabic about el se3eedy, a classic joke but very funny :D ;D
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@shoushou: lol, of course ur leaving, we BELIEVE YOU :P
and now ama go find some jokes riddles or insults (and some shirt printer if there is such a thing) :P
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Radio Conversation
This is supposed to be the transcript of an actual radio conversation between a US naval ship and Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. The Radio conversation was released by the Chief of Naval Operations on Oct. 10, 1995.
- Please change your direction 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.
- Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to South to avoid a collision.
- This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.
- No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.
- THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER ENTERPRISE, WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE US NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW!
- This is a lighthouse. Your call.
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looooooooooooooooooool
nice one ;)
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Zoo Job
One day an out of work mime is visiting the zoo and attempts to earn some money as a street performer. As soon as he starts to draw a crowd, a zoo keeper grabs him and drags him into his office. The zoo keeper explains to the mime that the zoo's most popular attraction, a gorilla, has died suddenly and the keeper fears that attendance at the zoo will fall off.
He offers the mime a job to dress up as the gorilla until they can get another one. The mime accepts.
So the next morning the mime puts on the gorilla suit and enters the cage before the crowd comes. He discovers that it's a great job. He can sleep all he wants, play and make fun of people and he draws bigger crowds than he ever did as a mime. However, eventually the crowds tire of him and he tires of just swinging on tires. He begins to notice that the people are paying more attention to the lion in the cage next to his. Not wanting to lose the attention of his audience, he climbs to the top of his cage, crawls across a partition, and dangles from the top to the lion's cage. Of course, this makes the lion furious, but the crowd loves it.
At the end of the day the zoo keeper comes and gives the mime a raise for being such a good attraction. Well, this goes on for some time, the mime keeps taunting the lion, the crowds grow larger, and his salary keeps going up. Then one terrible day when he is dangling over the furious lion he slips and falls. The mime is terrified.
The lion gathers itself and prepares to pounce. The mime is so scared that he begins to run round and round the cage with the lion close behind. Finally, the mime starts screaming and yelling, "Help me, help me!", but the lion is quick and pounces. The mime soon finds himself flat on his back looking up at the angry lion and the lion says, "Shut up you idiot! Do you want to get us both fired?"
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looooooooooooooooooool
nice one ;)
Thanks....u post gr8 stories too :D lol
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HAHAHA!! sanity ya this joke is in arabic hahaha...
and ok omer i am seriously leaving now i had been sayin this since morning but KHALAS i am offfffff!!
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LOL
OK, here comes something for football fanatics
Here are the best of Strachan's Sky Sports funnies...
Reporter: Welcome to Southampton Football Club. Do you think you are the right man to turn things around?
Stracham: No! I was asked if I thought I was the right man for the job and I said, "no, I think they should have got George Graham because I'm useless!"
Reporter: Is that your best start to a season?
Strachan: Well I've still got a job so it's far better than the Coventry one, that's for sure.
Reporter: Are you getting where you want to be with this team?
Strachan: We're not doing bad. What do you expect us to be like? We were eighth in the league last year, in the cup final and we got into Europe. I don't know where you expect me to get to. Do you expect us to win the Champions League?
Reporter: Gordon, you must be delighted with that result?
Strachan: You're spot on! You can read me like a book.
Strachan: I've got more important things to think about. I've got a yogurt to finish by today, the expiry date is today. That can be my priority rather than Agustin Delgado.
Reporter: This might sound like a daft question, but you'll be happy to get your first win under your belt, won't you?
Strachan: You're right. It is a daft question. I'm not even going to bother answering that one. It is a daft question, you're spot on there.
Reporter: Bang, there goes your unbeaten run. Can you take it?
Strachan: No, I'm just going to crumble like a wreck. I'll go home, become an alcoholic and maybe jump of a bridge. Umm, I think I can take it, yeah.
Reporter: There's no negative vibes or negative feelings here?
Strachan: Apart from yourself, we're all quite positive round here. I'm going to whack you over the head with a big stick, down negative man, down.
Reporter: where will Marion Pahars fit into the team line-up?
Strachan: Not telling you! It's a secret.
Reporter: You don't take losing lightly, do you Gordon?
Strachan: I don't take stupid comments lightly either.
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Their Sons
These 4 pals go out to play golf one sunny morning. One is detained in the clubhouse, and the other three are discussing their children while walking to the first tee.
"My son BIll," says one, "has made quite a name for himself in the home-building industry. He began as a carpenter, but now owns his own design and construction firm. He's so successful in fact, in the last year he was able to give a good friend a brand new home as a gift."
The second man, no to be out done, tells how his son began his career as a car salesman, but now owns a multi-line dealership. "George is so successful, in fact, in the last six months he gave his friend two brand new cars as a gift."
The third man's son, Albert, has worked his way up through a stock brokerage, and in the last few weeks has given a good friend a large stock portfolio as a gift.
As the fourth man arrives at the tee, another tells him that they have been discussing their progeny and asks what line his son is in.
"To tell the truth, I'm not very pleased with how my son turned out," he replies. "For 15 years, Frank's been a hairdresser, and I've just recently discovered he's gay. However, on the bright side, he must be good at what he does because his last three boyfriends have given him a brand new house, two cars, and a big pile of stock certificates."
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!!!
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shosho GO !! :P
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OK I WILL!! DONT SPEAK TO ME OR COMMENT ON ANYTHING I SAY U MAKE ME ANSWER >:( >:( >:(
BYEZZZZZ..................
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ok, some funny quotes now
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
David Bissonette
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
Sacha Guitry
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
Hemant Joshi
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Dumas
The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
Sigmund Freud
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Anonymous
@monica, of course, of course ur leaving, i believe you! *cough* NOT *cough*
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im leaving too ppl........got bio to study.
i hope u loved the stories i posted and some +repping wont hurt :P:P:P LOL
cya l8r
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Radio Conversation
This is supposed to be the transcript of an actual radio conversation between a US naval ship and Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. The Radio conversation was released by the Chief of Naval Operations on Oct. 10, 1995.
- Please change your direction 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.
- Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to South to avoid a collision.
- This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.
- No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.
- THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER ENTERPRISE, WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE US NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW!
- This is a lighthouse. Your call.
This is the video on youtube
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this joke is for all the Man. Utd. Fans :P
Bin Laden
Apparently, they've found Bin Laden, hiding in the Manchester United trophy room. He said it reminded him of his cave in Afghanistan; Large, dark, empty... and just been taken over by the Spanish.
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oh ok snitty, u get a +rep
and one last pile of jokes by me for tonite
"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
Henny Youngman
"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
Sam Kinison
"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
James Holt McGavran
"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."
Patrick Murray
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Nash
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
Anonymous
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Henny Youngman
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Milton Berle
Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
Anonymous
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
Anonymous
First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
(p.s. looking at my rep, it really, really, wudn't hurt if i get some +reps myself :P)
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[yt=425,350]<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/LNoVVc2s0LI&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/LNoVVc2s0LI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>[/yt]
a better example of us arrogance. us soldiers ram iraqi cars off the streets in baghdad
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this joke is for all the Man. Utd. Fans :P
Bin Laden
Apparently, they've found Bin Laden, hiding in the Manchester United trophy room. He said it reminded him of his cave in Afghanistan; Large, dark, empty... and just been taken over by the Spanish.
Speaking of Ben Laden, and empty trophy rooms, did you know he is actually an Arsenal Fan?
Hitler was a fan of Schalke 04?
and Mussolini was a fan of Lazzio?
and Silvestre Stallone is a fan of Everton?
and Sir Elton John is a fan of Watford?
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wth :O
i hope they all die painfully -.-
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wth :O
i hope they all die painfully -.-
we all moved to Genral Talk, join us :)
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WOW.... I think ive missed alooot :P
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yea lol, just scroll back and read :P
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whoaaa... this is the most active thread is it?? .. last night left it when it was 83 or summat.. ahaha .. k ..
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yea, it was 79 when i left yesterday at around 9 , i came online at around noon today and it was 91, and now its 99!
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ze proud starter of page 100 ;D
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It didnt start.I'll do it.
The proud starter of Page 100
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ze proud starter of page 100 ;D
hahahaha no ur not ur still on 99!!hahaha
HAHAHA I AM THE STARTER OF THE 100 PAGE!!HAHAHA!!
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You did it! The topic starter did it!
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HAHAHAHA!! thx Sweetsh for postin b4 me lol!! u made me the starter :P
haha this is funny!!
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This is being stupid 8)
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:'( :'( :'(
nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
this is soo unfair :-[
oh well congrats shoshou *rolls eyes* :P
and yeh stupid ::)
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hahaha..stupid hahaha...
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I have business exam tom!!morning session wohoo..cool!! ;) :D ;D
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The topic starter is amazing 8) One of the best members on the forum 8)
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The topic starter is amazing 8) One of the best members on the forum 8)
OH REALLY??!! I AM ONE OF THE BEST MEMBERS ON THE FORUM(I AM ABOUT TO CRY FROM HAPPINESS :'( :'( :'()
Sweetsh UR THE BEST MEMBER ON STUDENT FORUM!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
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" group hug and kiss ? " :P
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Ofcourse, no doubt!
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hahahaha!! GROUP HUG AND MILLIONS OF KISS!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
LOL!!!
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:-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
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hahaha thats alot of lipstick and lip marks :P
and why r u both offline lol, and how the hell do u go offline lol -.-
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Go search your profile, or shall I do it for you?
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explain it to him 7aram he really wanna know!!lol!!
i gtg just came to check...BYE!! :-*
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Again you started page 101 good job.
And bye
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Go search your profile, or shall I do it for you?
ok then? ill do it so i go offline/online any time :P
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byebye shosh ( sweetsh is much more better than u XD )
gn and gl tmr :)
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Again you started page 101 good job.
And bye
haha!! yaa haha!! BYE ANYWAY!! :-* :-* :-*
HAHA!! YA ABDO OF COURSE SHE IS..DONT EVEN COMPARE ME WITH HER...SWEETSH IS THE BEST WALAHI!! :-* :-* :-*
ABDO :P :P :P :P
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Abdo? If I were saying his name I'd say Aboud =)
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abood is much better ;D
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and ppl help a brother out here, how do u go offline? Profile ba3deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen.. :P
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Different nationalities=Different nicknames=Different pronounciation
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Different nationalities=Different nicknames=Different pronounciation
yes i know that :P
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I know you know that go see your messages
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HAHA!! ya abdo is Egyptian while abood is Jordanian...lol!!
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8)
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o lmao i looked everywhere but didnt notice it XD thanks sweetsh ^_^
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now we r all offline lol!! :D :D :D
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yup, " group hug and kiss ", now keep posting so we know if ur still here or not :P
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To whom are you talking aboud?
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everyone hidden =]
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Cool 8)
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" bounce bounce on the pedal put the pedal to the floor " (8)
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Then? 8)
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haha thats a song, then they start to sing it :P
hmm there should be a new thread, where u post good quotes from songs :P
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Yes go do it
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make one then!! ;)
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u all appear online to me :D lol
and if it is that cool......pm me about it.....cuz i know i saw how to do it SOMEWHERE but i just cant remember where!!!!!
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FOUND IT!!!.....
took me seconds! :D :P
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am i hidden now??
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hahaha!! we r all offline now!!haha!! ;D
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Hahahaha
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u guyz are the best :-*
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u guyz are the best :-*
ROXY R U DONE WID BUSINESS?? I AM NOT :'(
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but y do i see u all "online"........cuz im a mod?
if it is so, then .... COOOOL!! :p
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:-X
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WHAT! YOU ARE SAYING QUOTES FROM SONGS AND LAUGHING AND BLA BLA BLA AND YOU DIDNT FINISH YOUR STUPID BUSINESS EXAM PREPARATION!! BAN NOW NOW!!
Hahaha just kiddin why? =(
Yes sanity
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hahahahahaha!! ok ill get back now...i am good in business dont worry(although i did not really good in paper 1) haha!!over confidence!!
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hahahahahaha!! ok ill get back now...i am good in business dont worry(although i did not really good in paper 1) haha!!over confidence!!
dont worry.......inshallahu will compensate in the rest of the papers and get A* :D
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thx sanity, i am touched :'(..HEY CAN I SAY UR REAL NAME M***** hahaha(evil laugh becuz u don't remember mine) :P :P :P
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ok now i dont know who is online and who is offline >:(
lol!!
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ok now i dont know who is online and who is offline >:(
lol!!
shosh hahaha wth u still here ? :P
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wont leave :D
u can say my name if u want too.....i mean, im a guy, wont matter with me :P :P :D
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oh ya Abdo i am still here!!
ok ill say it then......Taftaf :P :P :P
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Sweetsh r u there??!!
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hey Roxy where r u?? When r u gonna sleep??!!
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heyyy llooolll
okay Im the onli one online ...:P or at least "visible"
and snitty how r u mate ..? havnt seen u on... u still remember me right? :P
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lol. I dunno we iM sleepin but Im not don't with business.... :-X
were both in the same boat :P
cant w8 2 c u 2mrw :D
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gtg peeps cya later, gl in ur exam !
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lol. I dunno we iM sleepin but Im not don't with business.... :-X
were both in the same boat :P
cant w8 2 c u 2mrw :D
ya cant wait!!hahaha!! :D
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Thanks....:D
Now tht Ive cum, every1s going.... :(
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cya abdo :D :P
im fine....its YOU who havent been on for a while :P :D
and im living these days in the arcade reclaiming my titles.....i got about 77 games now :D lol
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hey i made a new song!! "Good night my lovers, Goodnight my friends" haha this one is not sad abdo..lol!!
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Thanks....:D
Now tht Ive cum, every1s going.... :(
dont worry.....im stayin
i got no xams till 5 june :P
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MY 800TH POST !!! :D :D :D :D
[/font][/b][/u]
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oh ya Abdo i am still here!!
ok ill say it then......Taftaf :P :P :P
long time no hear.......this name, i havent heard it since i was 11 or something :D :P
but its gd to remember :P :D
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CONGRATS!! BALLOONS PEOPLE!!
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lol. thts tru snitty....
and the 5th !!! ooooh ur um lukky dude ... :D
anyywayz....
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MY 800TH POST !!! :D :D :D :D
[/font][/b][/u]
i passed u by 64 posts :P :D
u werent online for like 2 days......so i passed u :P :D
anywayzz.........CONGRATS!!!
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MY 800TH POST !!! :D :D :D :D
[/font][/b][/u]
haha i stay for this moment, gratz :P
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oh ya Abdo i am still here!!
ok ill say it then......Taftaf :P :P :P
long time no hear.......this name, i havent heard it since i was 11 or something :D :P
but its gd to remember :P :D
How about sasa?? haha :P :P
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CONGRATS!! BALLOONS PEOPLE!!
boo u didnt send me balloons when i reached 700 :(
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LOL...!!! YAH
PAARRRRRRTTTTTYYY !!!!
800 BALLOOONNSSS
AND SNitty... dnt worry s son as my examz finish Ill catch up with you,..:P
in fact I'll be able to catch up with mony ..:P
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hey Roxy ill see u tom then u and angel...and u have to meet my besties inshallah..lol!! angel already did!! :P
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whoooppss...!
dnt worry abdu... Ill send u 800 wen u get 880 posts :P
ad guyz wot about the +repps :P
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CONGRATS!! BALLOONS PEOPLE!!
boo u didnt send me balloons when i reached 700 :(
when u reach 800 i will :P :P :P
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lolll.... ur lukky abdu... then u'll have 1600 baloons ...:P
And yeah mony... cant w8 ..:D
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WE ARE THE NEXT MASTERs!!
hahahaha........
abdo......those r the moments u attend :P :D
-
yes +rep us someone keeps -rep me :P
-
TOM IS MY LAST EXAM PEOPLE!! AFTER BUSINESS ILL HAVE CHEMISTRY AND ACCOUNTING MULTIPLE CHOICE(EASY NO NEED FOR STUDYIN MUCH) ON 12TH OF JUNE SO 8 DAYS GAP!! AND HOLIDAY HERE I COME!! POOOOR U GUYS!! :P :P :P :P
-
+ rep from me
-
WOHOOOOO!! PARTY!!YAY ME!!
:P :P :P :P
-
looll... yups +rep 2 ya all from me...:D (whoever attended the party :P)
and looks like mony will be a master soon....:D
-
Thank You Thank You, ur far too kind :P
-
i +repped the 3 of u!!
and mony......HOW IN THE WORLD DID U REACH THE 970 POST!?!?!?! :P :D
u r a real poster :P :P
-
YA +REPPED U ROXY!! YA INSHALLA ILL BE MASTER SOON!!
YAY!!
-
WOOOHOOO !!!
Ive met my target !!! :D
thanx to all of you who have +epped me :D
my next target is to have 30 +repps :P
-
YA I THINK I AM A REAL POSTER!!LOL!! WHERE IS SWEETSH??
-
By the way shosh how did u get like +15reps in 1 day this week? :P
1 day u were like 15-20, next day, 30sih
-
+repped emi too :D
-
lolll...!!
dnt worry snitty.. as soon as our examz have finished , we'll be the "real posters" :P
And we'll becum masters in a day !!!
WOOHOOOO
lol.. yeah.. sweetsh ..were u gone ?
-
we r gonna be real POSTERs!!......and we r gonna slow down the site :P :D:D
where is sweetsh By the way??
-
i became popular abdo!!lol!!
eh da ya abdo enta hatno2 (ool mashallah) now ill be -repped!!lol!! kiddin...
-
hahaha lol
oh well, this time i have to go i hate waking up in the morning for school lol, and i drank too much coffee, so ill go walk around for a few mins :P
byebye ppl XD
-
and mashallah ya shosh 8)
-
kay guyz I rly have to study yeah ..
so Ill probably be back in about an hour...
Toodles ppl.... :-*
HAAHAHAAHHA ....!!! OH YEAH.... slow down the site ... tht was funnnnyy... I was crcking up...!!! "Roxy and sanity_master, ur posting too much and its slowing down the site"
*bursts out laughing*
-
bye!! me too gtg people!! i really enjoyed the party!!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
u cant beat me in postin people!! :P :P
Just kiddin..inshalla we will all be Masters!!!
-
lolll....
TOOOODLESSS GUYZ....
By the way.. r ny of you cumin back... or will we chat 2mrw...
actually I aint cumin 2mrw, got LiT AND physics ..!!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh
-
hey i have 20 posts left!! dnt forget to attend my party tom at zohor time in this thread!! haha nice invitation lol!! ill wait for u people dont be soooo late!!lol!!
BYE!!GOOD NIGHT!! :-* :-* :-*
-
kay guyz I rly have to study yeah ..
so Ill probably be back in about an hour...
Toodles ppl.... :-*
HAAHAHAAHHA ....!!! OH YEAH.... slow down the site ... tht was funnnnyy... I was crcking up...!!! "Roxy and sanity_master, ur posting too much and its slowing down the site"
*bursts out laughing*
LOL...........im rolling on floor laughing> ROFL
hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...................................."STOP POSTING! and stop being such great members" LOL......hahahahaha
gd bye abdo........
if we all became masters......whom r we gonna be "mastering" :D lol
-
illl try my best iinshallah !!!
I'll cum on just for the party with 1000 baloons :P
-
bye every1.....im stayin here for a while :P :D
-
LOOLLLL !!!
oh yeah ...:P
and then it was master786 saying tht he'll delete my posts every tym I post something .....looooll.......
-
HAHAHAHAHA!! Master786 yes hahahahahahaha!! he will delete all our posts includin this thread hahahaha!!
-
loooll.... didnt u go mony.....:P
JOKES......
-
LOOLLLL !!!
oh yeah ...:P
and then it was master786 saying tht he'll delete my posts every tym I post something .....looooll.......
hahahaha.....he said he was gonna do the same for me :D lol
but actually he did decrease ur posts.....dont u remember :P
-
ya roxy i am going >:( ur the one using my thread y didnt u go?? :P :P
haha jokin!!
-
loooooolll....!!
I decided I'll stay a bit longer and chat with snitty cuz I havnt spoken 2 him in aagess :P
-
long time!! :P :D lol
By the way....mony, u only got 26 more posts for the mastery.....lol
-
oh ya baby!! Sanity is busy talkin to me!! :P
HAHAHAHA!! lets fight over him Roxy!!hahaha
-
girls fighting over me.......seen that alot :P :P
hahahaha :P :D lol
-
he did ..!?!
loool... i cnt even Remeber ... or maybe didnt even realize loool!!!:P
Anywayz... so how hav ur examz been going so far ?
and Mony do my realize that after the 12th Im nver gonna see u agen until next year for AS !?! :(
looll...!! okay.. we'll all stay for a bit longer and chat...:D hows tht...:P
nd snitty dnt feel special ...:P :P :P :P
-
he did ..!?!
loool... i cnt even Remeber ... or maybe didnt even realize loool!!!:P
Anywayz... so how hav ur examz been going so far ?
and Mony do my realize that after the 12th Im nver gonna see u agen until next year for AS !?! :(
looll...!! okay.. we'll all stay for a bit longer and chat...:D hows tht...:P
nd snitty dnt feel special ...:P :P :P :P
no need to feel cuz i AM :P :P >>> gd answer i know :P :D lol
and my exams r not bad actually so far.....:D lol
-
OH YA ROXY!! I WONT SEE U AFTER 12!! :'( :'( :'(
no no this cant happened!! u have to come to my house!!lol!!
AND SANITY excuse me but its a girls talk... :P :P :P
-
feel freeeeeeeee.......
as long as this friendship wont break......:D
u can meet each other at malls.....el shalal....wt ever, they all work ;)
-
LOOOOL...!!!!
lol. yeah, tht'll be coool .. :D
and snitty u liv in jeddah :o
-
LOOOOL...!!!!
lol. yeah, tht'll be coool .. :D
and snitty u liv in jeddah :o
HAHA!! WE WERE IN THE SAME SCHOOL GIRL!! HAHA!!
-
LOOOOL...!!!!
lol. yeah, tht'll be coool .. :D
and snitty u liv in jeddah :o
im in jeddah yea :D......and i even got an invitation to go to el SHALAL on 13th of june.....my friends want me to go with them, but i havent thought about it yet.....i guess i got plans ( POSTING!) :P
-
huh...!?1
realllii looolll... wow I didnt even know tht
thwt he lved in Egypt :P
wot scool do u go to agen Mony ?
and wot school do u go to snitty ?
-
lol. yeeah I think I sud make a trip to shallal with ma frendzzz too.... lol.. I havnt been for a looong tymm
-
no not in Egypt in Jeddah and even eamyzz was with us in the same skool!!
ill tell u the name of my skool tom isa...lol!!
-
ooooh thts sooo coooll !!!
wot bout u snitty ?
-
mony, eamy and I were in the same skul........but they both left it
its GIS....Global int. school :D
-
oooh cool....
so ur still in Global..
thts the british school rhyt ?
is it co-education?
-
Smart sanity...i didnt want to say the name lol!! and eamyzz didnt leave ur the one who left...
-
huh...?
:P whoops mony ...
-
u know Farsi Center??!! global is over there..and i live right in front of it!!lol!!
-
Smart sanity...i didnt want to say the name lol!! and eamyzz didnt leave ur the one who left...
i knw i didnt say the name.....but i did :P
and i didnt leave it!!! at least not yet :D lol
for sure... u r the one who left :P :D
-
u know Farsi Center??!! global is over there..and i live right in front of it!!lol!!
u kidding!!!!
i was gonna live there too!!.....was gonna move in like 2 months ago! :D lol
-
oooh cooolll...!!!
open ur door Im outside :P
LOL... and tis is confusing.... so ho really left, and where dyou go wen u left...?
were do u live snitty ?
-
ohh really??!!lol!! we would have been neighbors lol!! Roxy we r soo much failing..lol!!
-
i know man..!!!
I still have th inance chapter left ... damn... but ahl Ive finished 2 past papers while I was on here.... :D
+repp for me :P
-
I was in Global from Grade 4 till Grade 9...so 5 years
and eamyzz joined in Grade 7...
-
ahaan ... coooll..
I was in Manarat from grades 3 to grade 6, and then from gr9 to 10.... so 5years for me tooo
lol...
half way..from 7-8 I went to PISJ... the school th we go to for our examz... ;D
-
oh really 5 years like me in global!!lol!! ;D
-
i joined in grade 7 too.....and im still in it till 10 and maybe i will leave it nxt year.
i should have been leaving to college nxt year.....bs naseeb :( :D lol
we take homestudying when we leave skul :D
and i guess u better go nd study.......dont worry about me :)
-
hmmm we r not worried about u >:( right roxy??!!
lol!! kiddin
-
ana saken fe 7ay el gam3a.......far!!
-
MONY.....u got 7 more posts!!!!
u better save them for the guys!! :P :D
-
ukh ya 7 more left....hmmm....Roxy where did u go??! we will sleep on da paper tom.... :(
-
lolll...... why home schooling..? actually I was considering homeschooling too,but not anymore... u eI may loose out oon my wild nd hyper side that onli cums out in school..:P NOT at home... m parents would kick me out lollll.....!!!
and no snitty... I told you rd dont feel special.. ma and mony were chatting. no ones worrying about you ...:P
JOKING MATE... no hard feelings ..:P
Looks like my internet isgetting messed up agenn ... damn... sorry If I take long to reply.. I'll probably b refreshing my page 100 tymmss..!!!
-
ukh ya 7 more left....hmmm....Roxy where did u go??! we will sleep on da paper tom.... :(
u better go get some rest...
-
lol.. look at him shoo-ing us away
anywayz Im gonna go.. I stilll have to finish
so Ill cya 2mrw Mony
and Ill cya 2mr snitty (on SF) at Mony's party :D
-
ya Roxy..every one is gona do home studying even me isa.... and ya we better go off, ill see u tom inshallah...dont forget to pray and say dua.....bye Roxy n Sanity!!
-
and Sanity dont shooo me away >:( >:( >:(
lol!!kiddin good night people!!
-
lol
bye lovely !! :-*
good luck :D
-
4 posts left!! lol!! ill wait for Sweetsh tom..cant have the party wid out her!!
-
bye gurlz :P :D
gd luck in ur exam(s)
may God be with u :)
-
DAMN!
what type did y'all sleep?
and hey Shush, don't you have a biznes paper, in the MORNING SESSION TODAY!?
-
gd morning guys,
how was the business paper ??
-
gd morning guys,
how was the business paper ??
24 hours :P jk
-
HEY PEOPLE!! ;D
BUSINESS WAS SOOOOO GOOD!! AND NOW I HAVE ONLY 2 POSTS LEFT!!
I CANT PARTY WITHOUT OTHERS..SWEETSH?? AND ROXY??(U PROBABLY DIDNT REACH HOMW YET ROXY I WAS JUST WID U LOL!!)
I THINK ILL JUST NOT POST ANY POSTS...UNTIL THEY COME :-\..OR MAYBE ILL DELETE OLD POSTS LOL!! ;D
AND OMER I SLEPT AT 4 AM :P
-
WOOOOHHHHOOO !!!
GUYZ THT WAS THE BESTESTEST PAPER EVERRRR !!!!:D
-
MONY, I shall be the first to congratulate u for ur 1000 post ,,,
lol...
CONGRATULATIONS MONY FOR BECOMING A MASTERRR !!! :D :D :D
[/u][/b][/font][/u][/u][/u][/b]
-
2dayz business ppr was very good [gr8].... and wow itz my last day im soo happy.
Party time shushu........ ;) ;)
-
lol :)
-
then i shall be the second person to congratulate u on the 1000 posts!!
u r a MASTER with 2 more posts!!
DO IT!!!
-
Lol.... Im guessing I saw you today Maruha ??
am I right ...
and guyz,.. I dont think Monys gonna reply just yet.. shes w8in 4 every1 .... cuz in her next 2 replies shell becum a master :P
-
sweetsh ...?
where r u ?
were w8 for u to cum to the PARTYYYYYYY !!!!
:P
and guyz a head start... Ive just sent 500 balloons
my other 500 will cum wen mony arrives ..:P
-
ok sherry, how bout this, just modify ur last post everytime u wanna say something
-
OH MY GOD THANKS GUYZ!!! :-* :-* :-* (I WAS DELTEING MY OLD POSTS)LOL!!
MARUHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! HEY!! PEOPLE!! MURUHA IS MY BEST FRIEND IN REAL LIFE LOL!!
-
looooooooooooll...!!!
yeah.... !! :D
-
lol.llll...!!! yes Maruha... so I wasnt rong about seeing you today loool..!!
well welcome to the forumm...:D
-
ok, while we're waiting for sweetsh, how about we start guessing Maruha's name?
c'mon, gimme a hint!
-
Mony you have to remeber that Im only here for the party.. after that guyz .. I seriously have to go.. as I have absolutely no tym to waste...
Physics AND literature 2mrw !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 :'(
-
OK ILL PM SWEETSH!! AND MARUHA IS FROM JORDAN....
-
MARUHAAAA .....??
where have you got to .... ??
loool
-
welcome to SF Maruha,
NOW GIMME MY HINTS! ;D
*somebodys hyper today!*
-
lol. yes... Manaratie Hyper ....:P
-
MAROOOO!! RO7TI FAIN??!!
-
im wid u guys didnt go anywhere w congrats ya shushu
-
OKay Mony .... is it okay If I send over the rest of my 500 balloons and my congrats ... and then leave.. before the party ??
-
hey roxy from wheer do u get 500 ballons... my bday is tomorwo can u send me 100000001 balloons over...
-
loool.
I'll wish you a gooood life Shogun.... :)
so I'll be here 2mrw to ddo tht ..:D
-
OKay Mony .... is it okay If I send over the rest of my 500 balloons and my congrats ... and then leave.. before the party ??
OK ROXY!! :'( :'( :'(
or why dont u study??!! and keep refreshen the page till Sweetsh comes?? ;D
-
yup.. shushus right saty for a while roxy lets see watz shushu gonna do... ;D
-
oh kay... sounds good.. lol. if only there were speakers and a microphone attached to this ... I'll beable to hear you call me :P :P :P
-
oh kay ... where has evey1 disappeard 2 ??
-
oh kay ... where has evey1 disappeard 2 ??
lol just came, i was helpin my mom to clean the room.. ;D
-
aww... thts a good lad ...:P
+repp for you ....:D
-
and who just -repped me ??
-
it sweetsh wont come.... :(
its ok Roxy go study dont waste ur time...lets all come after 30 min....
-
okay 30 mins it is ...
bye guyz .... :)
and can sum1 bring me repp back up plzzz....:D
-
what if seetsh spends the whole day studying for physics?
and sure roxy, there ya go
-
exactly... shushu's right roxy go study welll u hav 2 exams :'( :'(
see u guys after 30 min.
-
Thanx Omer ..:D
Toodles guyzzz.....:D
-
waitin for the party......got biology ppl
SWEETSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
biology is on friday, we got physics paper THREE TOMORROW!
oh well, ama leave now, come back at around 3:30
PEACE!
-
i am sooo sleepy...lol!! lets then come back at 4 people!!!
Srry for keepin u waitin ;D
The party was delayed lol!! :P
-
yes.. im sleepy tooo..lol
shushu dont party without me ya bet mashi
At 4 ill be online i.s.a
-
i wont be home at 4 :(
make it at 6:30 or 7 and i will be here :D
-
Bye bye then at 4 inshalla we all come back..and ill keep on modifying this post becuz i am tired to deleting lol!!BYE!!
MARO +REP FOR U...WE ILL CALL AT HOME..MATKHAFEESH LOL!!
HEY YA SANITY EH DAH??!! we wait till 7 for u..lol!!
ok lets then wait 15 mins..... :(
-
ok now i am soooooooooooooooooo sleepy and everyone is off....so bye ill post the 1000post tom or sumthin...i am gonna go party tonight..i wont be home :P :P :P
bye people!! :-*
-
bus, couldnt be any easier ^_^
-
hey guyz...!!
Im hee for the partyyy
oh whooops.. loks like its been delayed... okay . um. is it 4 00 or 7 00 ?
anywayz ... If Im not here dont worry about iit... just continue your party, cuz I have ody sent my +repp to mony, my congratsad my 500 balloons. So wen I do cum back, then I'll +repp every1 else who attended aswell as the rest of my 500 baloons
okay ...? :)
-
ok i'm here!
(not for long thouhg, physics paper 3 is kinda intimidating)
-
uh... okay... dusnt look like any1 else is here oryt peeps.. Il be back at 7 00 then ....
I realllyyyy gottaaa studdy for both lit. AND physics ,
god knows if I'll finish ...
and My internet is playing up agen.. so its taking me time to post...
-
oh well good luck Rox with physics AND LIT, you'll need it more than me :P
-
wish anyone good luck to me too.. i realizzed i dont even know n what i studied of physics for two consecutive years .. n wow i assumed i rocked in it ..
-
p.s who negative repped me? or was it always like tht? ahahahahahaha .. lol .. like i care anyways..
-
i ain't sure, but ama +rep in case someone did
HEY, i finally reached number 10!
WOOOHOOO!
-
What party!? :( howcome no one told me about it?! :o
-
OMER!
yea, bout the party....
no one has any idea when they gonna do it,
shush insists on having everyone online,and there always seems to be one or two people missing, so she keeps on delaying it, and then people like me and rox said that we need to study, funnily enough, we have been the two most active people ;D
so yea hows everyone's study going? i am so lazy this week, i didn't even bother studying, just flipping through already-solved past papers
how bou everyone else?
-
haha im doin the same thing over here. Just looking at solved past papers XD
Ok count me in im online now 8)
By the way, how did you do in your chem.?
-
messed up in most of it,
just hoping the boundaries are low enough for me to get a B
how about u?
-
hmmmm HEY PEOPLE!! just came from outside..lol!! and still gonna go out again at night lol!!
nowwwwww ill be modifying this post every time..its realli bad when u are not able to post :(
i have been removin my post today...i deleted like 7 or sumthin....
hey how was ur paper by da way???
-
hahaha shosh, helllo :P
By the way remove some of ur older posts and make new ones :P
-
how was bus, it was amazing :D
atm im making notes in my book for lit, tmr. hopefully they dont notice lol, cuz everyone doing it too, they cant possibly disquallafy everyone ? ( how do we spell disquallafy ? :P)
-
disqualify
or just dq
-
ah yes Thank You :P
-
oh well am outta here
if i try to come back, remind me to GET OUT! lol
-
i deleted more posts :D
ill wait for tomorrow i guess...becuz i am going out isa.....bye people...and good luck for physics.. :)
-
=( you'll leave me alone?
-
heyyy peeeepss..
yes remeber guyz t emind me to leave wen I have posted enough
lol...:P
I cant sem to remeber myself ...
and PHYSICSSSS !!
Im revisiing through the pressue stuff and electricity stuff !
wens the paty gonna start ?
-
isn't everyone online yet?
-
u know what i think i am gonna start it becuz majority r here!! and Sweetsh ill pm her..and eamyzz
wait omer dont leave..and u too roxy...lol!!
-
Mooonyyy !!!
wots going on? :P
I need to study man /!!! I wasnt even suposed to touch my computer !! looool...!!1
and now Im the onli one online !!!
aaah !!
-
what is this party about aslan? :P
-
well basicaly zerozero... Mony/shoosh is becung a master after a few posts... she will reach 1000 posts so we gonna celebrate ...
and the poor galkeeps on deleting her posts cuz sges w8 for every to cum on at the same tym
loooll
anywayz Im startiing the paty now.... In my next post :D
-
shosh u have 10 mins i need to go continue studying lit =(
-
OH damn it .. lollll...!!!
I have to wait until Mony posts those 2 more posts soo post mony post :P
-
boo who -rep'd me -.-
-
lol roxy 3 more :P
-
loool .... I just +repped you ...
and abdu.... wots up with the "Boos" ?
:P
-
hahaha :P congrats shoshou :D it's early right?
-
Oh god.!! did she just delete another post !!!
omg Monyyyyy
!!!
loooooollll...!!!
this is funnyyy !!i have to go Matie ...!!!
-
loool .... I just +repped you ...
and abdu.... wots up with the "Boos" ?
:P
didnt know what to write :P
and shosh clock is ticking! Tick-Tock !
-
yes... I think I shud do at toooo
the clock is about to stuck-uh.... 10 minuites past wot it oredy is...:P
better hurrryyyy ............Tick Tock TICK tOCK ....:P
-
does anyone play MapleStory!? :P
-
Boo who -repped me ?
:P
-
ok people!!! Sanity its 6:30 and u didnt come..eamyzz i pm u...and Sweetsh toooooooooooooooooooooooo
-
Boo who -repped me ?
:P
we may never know, but who \+rep'd u, that would be me 8)
-
lol. Thanks mate ...
okay shall we start then...
TICK TOCK TICK TOCK
-
2 more post!! and were gonna start!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
-
1 MOREEEE !!!
-
ITS THE 1000TH POST PEOPLE!!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!
-
CONGRATULATIONS MONICA FOR BECOMING A MASTER & FOR BEING THE BEST MEMBER ON THE FORUM!!!!
LOVE YOU LOAAADZZ :-*[/b][/b]
[/b][/u][/u][/u][/b]
1000 BALLOOOOONS FROM MEEEE!!!!
-
WOOOHOOOOOOOO
PARRRRRTTTTAAAAAAYYYYYYY PEOPLEEEE !!!!!
CAKEEEEE !!!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
AND DONT FORGET THE +REPPS :P
-
CONGRATS ;D
-
THANKS TO ALL MY FRIENDS..THX A LOT PEOPLE U REALLY WAITED FOR ME!!
I LOVE U ALL!!! :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
hahahahahahahahahaha
tick tockkkkkkk
u beat teh clock
GRATZ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
Haloooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ;D ;D
-
NOW EVERYONE +REP THE OTHER!! I WANNA REACH 39 REPS PEOPLE!!LOL!!
-
LOOOOLLL
WE LOVE YOU TOOO MATIE !!!! :D :D :D
-
Okay guyzz.... back tooooo physssicsssss............ :'(
-
ME TOOOOOOOOO GOT TO GO!!
SANITY, SWEETSH AND OMER U R HERE WID US PEOPLE!! WE DIDNT FORGET U!! :-* :-* :-*
-
wat abt me >:(
-
wat abt me >:(
hahaha eamyzz!! u r also here wid us but i mentioned the name of the people who r not really here!!
GROUP HUG!! :-* :-* :-*
-
:-*
-
SWEETSH!! I REALLY WISHED U WERE HERE!! :-* :-* :-*(but they had physics exam sorry :-\)
Omer...thx for being here too..lol!!
Sanity..merci gedan for being here in da morning and waitin... :)
I HOPE I DIDNT FORGET ANYONE...A VERY BIG KISS TO MY FOUR BEST FRIENDS ON THE FORUM...ROXY, SWEETSH, EAMYZZ AND ANGEL!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
OH MY GOD!! MARUHA I FORGOT U!! MA3LESH YA BET..LOL!!
-
OH YA!! AND I WOULD LIKE TO THANK ALL THE MODERATORS AND ADMINS TOO!!LOL!!
SORRY PEOPLE I HAVENT BEEN POSTING SINCE MORNING SO I AM NOW LOL!!
-
loool....bet3awadee ;D
-
loool....bet3awadee ;D
haha yes..i deleted like 10 old posts or sumthin..lol!!
-
Hi everyone, sorry my exam was at pm today and I came late to home and slept a little bit because I'm so tired then revising physics now.
Congratulations ShouShou 7abebti...Welcome to the masters group...Hope you are all good
-
hey sweetsh
hello
long time no c
anyway
best of luck to every1 for the exam
-Adi
:)
(i too turned old..lol..i mean senior citizen)
cake for me...
yeahhhh!!lol
-
Thank you adi.
Where did everyone go?
-
lol...i was really scared of u ... i thought u were dissappointed wid me
but i guess its fine now
lol...hey
i turned old..
haha
i mean senior citizen
yeahh... :D
-
No ofcourse, congratulations.
-
Hi everyone, sorry my exam was at pm today and I came late to home and slept a little bit because I'm so tired then revising physics now.
Congratulations ShouShou 7abebti...Welcome to the masters group...Hope you are all good
hey i was jst asking shoushou abt u long tym i ddnt c u :)
hw wass ur exam hope it was good
-
It was additional math =S But it wasnt bad.
-
heyyyyy sweeetshhh !!! :D
We were w8in for soooo long for you to cum... sorry that we started without you lot... but you were all remembered :D
-
No problem sweety, I hope you enjoyed. So do you physics guys tomorrow?
-
It was additional math =S But it wasnt bad.
isA A* ;)
-
I really want an A, but if I got a B now its not a problem I'll resit it after AS. But some questions were really hard
-
I really want an A, but if I got a B now its not a problem I'll resit it after AS. But some questions were really hard
god help u grl...isA u will get wat u want...n if da qs were hard hopefully da curve will b low :)
-
aww... Inshallah u;'ll get an A, you seem smart 1st of al lur taking Add Maths- that many of us cannot do and 2nd of all ur still 15 ....so mashallah !! Feel proud of urself !! :D
-
Inshalah, where is everybody else? Shoushou?
-
lol... every1s gone off to study and Monys gone out shopping or sumwhere ....
she came, partied then left .... :D
-
HEY!! SWEEEEEEEEEEETSH!! WE MISS ED U!! :-*
DONT WORRY ABOUT UR PAPER INSHALLA THE CURVE WOULD BE LOW!!
-
lol... every1s gone off to study and Monys gone out shopping or sumwhere ....
she came, partied then left .... :D
HAHA!! I STILL DIDNT LEAVE LOL!!
-
hey sweetsh
good to hear ur additional math was good
i find only the integration part difficult
hope u get an A* in physics and add. math
-
Ya salam, you dont have physics tomorrow?
-
looooolll...!!
Mony u still here .../!! hahahahaha ....
anywayz ....
-
Ya salam, you dont have physics tomorrow?
wohooo no physics(in nov) and i don't take bio....
SO I AM ALMOST DONE...I ONLT HAVE CHEMISTRY AND ACCOUNTING MULTIPLE CHOICE ON 12TH(AND THEY R EASY)...
SO I AM REALLY HAVIN A PARTY :P :P :P
AND ADI CONGRATS!!
-
hey tks shoshou
heard a lot abt u
but i have never spoken to u..
lo..
hope we converse a lot in the future
:D
-
nd wow Adi ...!! ur repp is 50 !!!!!
mashallah !!! :D
-
Shoushou good for you 7abebti...No pressure
-
ITS THE 1000TH POST PEOPLE!!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!
hey! congrats!
anyways, back to physics :(
-
LOOOL...!!
welcum back Omar... if u had waited one post more... u wudnt have missed the party ... anywayz..
did u get ur physics don't then ?
actualy howr u studying ?
-
HEY ADI.. r u eddie..adi?? and u changed ur nickname??
thx Omer..u joined late :P
Sweetsh the days will pass fast dont worry
Roxy shouldnt u be studyin :P
-
I hate physics do you know that?
-
lol. yeah I shud be .. Thanks for reminding me ..its just that Im home alone, and I need company... :'(
aand Im nearkly don't with physics .. I just need 2 go thro sum past papers thn move on to literature
-
HEY ADI.. r u eddie..adi?? and u changed ur nickname??
thx Omer..u joined late :P
Sweetsh the days will pass fast dont worry
Roxy shouldnt u be studyin :P
yes i did,,did u change ur nickname too
because i cant recognize u
sry :(
-
She was called MOnica but ShouShou is better, similar to my nickname
-
i know! and the silly part is just like roxy said, i left just before the party started, oh well, late is better than never!
and bout my studies, i just decided to flip over my already-solved past papers and the equations, i am in such a hyper mood today i can't even focus on studying for more than 20 minutes
By the way, does anybody happen to watch Tennis over here?
oh and shush, how about you change the poll into Shoushou or Shush
-
oryt guyz ,.... My party shud be soon got about 17 left untill 900 hope ur alll here to party :D
so for now.
Toodlesss/.....:D
ca sum1 +repp me ? :P
-
Ofcourse!
-
OOOOOOOH i LOOOOVE TENNIS .... actually I love wotchin it... its really weird cuz I hate to play it ... mos probably cuz Im rubbish at tennis.. but I find it intsting to wotch !!
:D
-
ohh..so soshou = monica..
cool..
nice nickname
haha
i thought it was a boy
lol..
:D
-
Thanks sweetsh ..:D
Oryt Im seriously serious about going ...:P
Tooooooodles ...:D
and yes Omar Hyper = Manaratie.....I am not suprised :P
-
oryt guyz ,.... My party shud be soon got about 17 left untill 900 hope ur alll here to party :D
so for now.
Toodlesss/.....:D
ca sum1 +repp me ? :P
almost missed one party, so i am NOT missing the other one 8)
-
hahaha Roxy u need company..haha..where r ur sisters or brother?? :P
Really Sweetsh?? i thought its a good subject..anyway i have to take it later its the only subject left and ill complete my o-levels. :-\
ya Sweetsh and I have similar letters even in our names..lol!!
+rep roxy..
haha!! adi!!
and i ve been tryin to post and this messege apeared to me for 7 times Warning - while you were typing a new reply has been posted. You may wish to review your post.
-
NOO ADI
-
noo??
wat did i do!!
-
okk...guys
i gtg.,.
good luck for ur exams
my best wishes with u guys
hope u all do extremely well..
bye .
gud night,,
-
LOOOL...!!
Thanx Mony ...!! lool.. I dunno why I still call you Mony wen every1 calls u shoushou.. maybe cuz you look like a Monica :P
And ma lil bro is graduating from G3 2day so evey1s gone to the graduation....! and im "studying" physics ...:P
-
ShouShou isnt a boy nickname.
And shoushou I love you.
Roxy bye sweety good luck
-
ia m home alone 2 :( :(
-
OOOOOOOH i LOOOOVE TENNIS .... actually I love wotchin it... its really weird cuz I hate to play it ... mos probably cuz Im rubbish at tennis.. but I find it intsting to wotch !!
:D
Believe me Roxy, even for a Manarati, i am way more hyper than anyone else, and i got the whole school, teachers, students, and the other no-use staff to testify for that lol (you can ask panther or rfi, they go to MARS too)
and about tennis, whom do you support
-
Me...Nadal <3
-
haha..cool Roxy!!
Everyone one calls me different name..i have like 6 or sumthin lol!!
Sweetsh I love u more!! :-* :-* :-*
Eamyzz haha..
-
ya omer..u seem hyper...lol!!
even rfi is more hyper than u..lol!!
-
Ummm..... i dont rly have a favorite ... but Roger Fredera i supose ...:P
-
WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!
oh sweetsh, u poor, poor, thing!
You support Man U, AND Nadal?!
WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
ROTF
DAMN! IGs, Man U losing the Champions League, Nadal going out to some unknown guy, damn!!!!!
-
I hate you Omer!
-
lol
-
=(
-
ppl i rlly want 2 study lets all take a break n come bak after an hour ;D
-
Nadal oryt mate... wots rong with him ...? :O
but ManU is a different story ...:P
okay guyz .. I think this is the 3rd tme Im saying this
soooo
BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
:-* :-* :-*
-
ya omer..u seem hyper...lol!!
even rfi is more hyper than u..lol!!
rfi? shariq? he ain't exactly hyper, yea he does get crazy quite a lot, but he doesn't get anywhere near me, even he admits it.
he gets people wasted and you see devilish look in his eyes and all, but he doesn't match my hyperness, he doesn't get too physical
when i am hyper, i start jumping around like a 5-year old, i start laugh-screaming for the silliest things, i just become like a loony toon (some 9th graders call me k.e. just so they can memorize their terms better)
-
looooolll
weirrrdddooooooo ....:P
at least Im not THAT hyper ...:P
-
I HAVE 8 MORE POSTS UNTIL 900
SHALL send em now or later ..?
-
oh c'mon Roxy, u haven't heard
the so-called King of Clay went out of the last 16 to Tommy Robredo by 3 sets to one!
and yea, so i s'pose i'm the only one who watches both men and women
yea the Roger Fed is my fav for men, i used to like Henin-Hardene for women, but she retired last year, didn't settle into any new favourite, but i kinda like Ivanovic
(oh sweetsh, i would pay anything to see the look on your face, or any other manchester/nadal/ fan the day both of them went out!)
-
Ok this seems a bad season for me, manchester,real madrid, nadal everything is going the opposite.
-
I HAVE 8 MORE POSTS UNTIL 900
SHALL send em now or later ..?
NOW NOW NOW NOW!
DO IT WHILE AM HYPER!
-
loooool.... oky half of t u ssed i didnt get... showshow much of a tennis fan I aint...:P whooops... I just wotch it for fun...:P
The olnly bit I got was :
and yea, so i s'pose i'm the only one who watches both men and women
yea the Roger Fed is my fav for men,
looool..
7 MORE....:D
-
Ok this seems a bad season for me, manchester,real madrid, nadal everything is going the opposite.
madrid? 6-2 , 4-0 , (sound any familiar?)
or wait wait, manchester 4-1 in old trafford to liverfool
Oh well, this is a bad season for you lol, but i inshalla ur Ig report will change it all ;)
-
Hsssssssshhh. I'm studying physics. =\
=P
-
hey Omer!! Rfi is a gooooood boy..lol..u may be quite and a weirdo but he is good... :P
Hey Shogun!!
Ya Roxy post em now....
Hey eamyzz goooooooo study dont waste ur time :P
-
6 MORE .... :D
-
loooool.... oky half of t u ssed i didnt get... showshow much of a tennis fan I aint...:P whooops... I just wotch it for fun...:P
The olnly bit I got was :
and yea, so i s'pose i'm the only one who watches both men and women
yea the Roger Fed is my fav for men,
looool..
7 MORE....:D
yea i know, it made so much more sense when it was in my head!
ok what i was saying, for women's tennis Justine Henin-Hardene used to be my favourite, but she retired last year and i didn't settle into a new favourite, but i kinda like Anna Ivanovic
and yea i usally watch tennis for fun, but if its Federer or Nadal playing, i get a bit extreme
-
5 MORREEEEE ....
Oay guyz i wanna w8 for snitty ...:P loool... has he passed 900 ..?
-
loooll... Its okay Omar Inderstand ... lollll...:D
4 MOREEEE ..... ;D
okay ill stop posting now
tooodlesss ....:D
-
Hahahaha <3
-
hey Omer!! Rfi is a gooooood boy..lol..u may be quite and a weirdo but he is good... :P
Hey Shogun!!
Ya Roxy post em now....
Hey eamyzz goooooooo study dont waste ur time :P
oh SHouhsou, the only thing quite about him is his voice, and it ain't like he can control it, his voice is naturally soft!!!
belive me shoushou, this guy has architectured most of the school pranks we do (yea, he is just the mastermind, he doesn't actually execute anything)
c'mon hurry up roxy, lets do this party and leave to study!
-
oh okay.... I think Ill be postin ..... and this is my ... um... okay I think Ive lost track of posts ...
-
2 moreeee ! ;D
-
1 MOREEEEEEE !!!!!!!!! ;D
-
yes come on!!
-
CONGRATULATIONS ROXY FOR YOUR 900th post!
[/shadow]
PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
OH COMMON!
-
THIS IS OFFICIALLY MY 900TH POST!!! WOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!!!!
[/b][/b][/b][/b]
-
CONGRATS ROXY!!!
-
so whos briing the 900 balooonsss ...:P
PARRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
Congratultions..!
Cake and cookies! =)
8)
-
ok!
party's over
get back to physics
(why didn't you guys remind me to get out like i asked you!)
yalla salam
-
THNXXXX LOAAAADZ GUUUYYYYZZZZZ !!!!!!!!!
were still missing ppl tho... Emmy, Angell, snitty and Q80, wishh u were her !!!!!!!! :D
-
hehe... yh im goingggg toooo
TTTOOOOOODDDLESSSSSS :D : :D
-
900 BALLOONS TO ROXY!!!
[/b]
SALAM OMER!!
-
Good Luck for physics!!
Roxy really u and omer go study..dont waste ur time!!
oh also Sweetsh and eamyzz...
-
I am studying 8)
-
haha..GOOD!! ;)
-
OK BYEEEEEEEEEEEE PEOPLE!! MY FRIEND IS WAITIN DOWNSTAIRS!!
GOOD LUCK FOR TOM PEOPLE!!!
PRAY AND SAY DUA..EVERYTHING IS GONA BE FINE ISA!!
:-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
thank you sweety have fun
-
so i guess i missed it all didnt i :'(
didnt want this to happen...but i had a bio lesson, thats y i missed it :(
anywayzz.....congratzz mony and wish u all the best..... :)
congrats to roxy too for the 900th post :D :P
-
am I late...did i miss Roxy's party :-\
its ok i was partying wid einstein and hooke ;D :P
CONGRATS Roxy 4 da 900th post ;) :-* :-* :-*
-
well, it should've been my party with my 900th posts.....but i wasnt that active today, very tired :D lol
so i got 6 more till the 900th lol
-
ol. yeah snitty I wanted a combined party, myn and urs since were both hitting 900 posts together....
but I had sooo much physics... and most of the ppl were here then.. so I had to start thenn
soryy mate .... but did yu +repp me ? :P
OKAY ill be there for ur prty hopefully
quickly... Lets do it now u onli gt a few morwe posts ....:D
-
+ rep for u :)
-
thnxxx..
so r u plannin 2 party now? or shall I go back to physics ?
-
i got 3 left lol :D lol
-
GO snitty Go ..! :P
-
lets do it now then :D :)
and ppl can party l8r lol
-
LOL. OKAY MORE TO GOO !
-
!!~!!MY OFFICIAL 900TH POST!!~!!
wt an achievement :D :P
hahahaha
-
CONGRATULATIONS SNITTY ON REACHING 900 POSTSSS!!!! WOOOOHOO :D
[/b][/b][/b][/b]
-
Congratualtions Sanity!!!!!! 8)
-
+REPP FOR U !!!
AND HERES 900 BALLLOONS FROM ME WITH CAKE !!
SO PAAAARRRRRTTTTTAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY !!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
-
And me I'll bring cake and cookies as usual =)
-
and i will just eat them as usual :P :D lol
Thanks for the +rep ;)
Thanks guyz :D
-
okay Im assuming Snitty has run off to his Arcade section agen :P
So.... back to physics ....!!!
Toodles ...!:D
-
oh lol u didnt go ..:P
Oryt bye guyz ,....:D
-
!!~!!MY OFFICIAL 900TH POST!!~!!
wt an achievement :D :P
hahahaha
I made a cake wid dream whip and strawberrys and ummmm this sounds tasty
so CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2o3baly ya rab ;D
+rep ;)
yalla 3eesh ;D
-
Bye Roxy come back again
-
byeeeeeeeeeeee :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
Haha I just recognized that I missed my 1500th Post :(
-
aww...!!
dnt worry can still partyyyy !!!
so CONGRATULATIONS SWEETSH ON UR 1510 POST !!!!
WOHOOOOO !!!
+REPP !
-
Thank youuu 8) <3
-
Thanks ppl.......Thanks eamy :D :)
and congratzz sweetsh !! :) :D
-
Thank you sanity =D
-
Haha I just recognized that I missed my 1500th Post :(
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[/b][/color]
wohohooooooooooooooooooooooooooowohoooooooooooooooooooooooooo((((zamameer)) ;D
+rep
-
+ rep for u sweetsh and u eamy ;)
-
Thank you Eamyzz!! "Zamameer" hahaha and there were real zamameers going on in the street while reading it...
<3
-
+ rep for u sweetsh and u eamy ;)
thnk u u r an angel :D
-
Thank you Eamyzz!! "Zamameer" hahaha and there were real zamameers going on in the street while reading it...
<3
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA.....mezabata ma3ahom ana :D :P
-
Thank you sanity =)
+REP for you and Eamyzz
-
congratulations sweetsh....+rep..
lol
:)
-
+ rep for u sweetsh and u eamy ;)
thnk u u r an angel :D
ya 7eneyetik :) ;)
By the way......g2g nw.......so catch u l8r guys :D lol
-
Haha thank you. you too +REP..
REP PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
tks
bye sanity
u beat me in billiards and fpong
hell!lol..
kidding
keep up the good work
:D
-
+ rep for u sweetsh and u eamy ;)
thnk u u r an angel :D
ya 7eneyetik :) ;)
By the way......g2g nw.......so catch u l8r guys :D lol
HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA.....tyb yalla roo7 me 2 guys i willl catch up wid u guys l8r Take care ALL
:-*s 4 grls and hi fives 4 guys ;D
-
<3 Take care.
-
<3 Take care.
u 2 7abeebte ;)
bye 4 nw catch up wid u guys l8r
-
HUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
I missed ma promotion am a geek nw and i ddint celebrate it :'( :'(
soo sad :'(
-
HEY PEOPLE I JUST CAME FROM OUTSIDE!!!
I AM GOING TO MAKKAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! ISA....ILL PRAY FOR ALL OF U OVER THERE!!!!
BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
HEY PEOPLE I JUST CAME FROM OUTSIDE!!!
I AM GOING TO MAKKAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! ISA....ILL PRAY FOR ALL OF U OVER THERE!!!!
BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ :-* :-* :-* :-*
BYE hun :-* :-* :-*
-
You are going now hunny?
-
You are going now hunny?
ya i am going to Makkah now!! i didnt know..they just told me...ill pray for all of u inshallah!
-
Please =( You know by my name =) And then say to get A*s in all subjects =) Hahaha im rude !Thank you sweety 8)
-
Please =( You know by my name =) And then say to get A*s in all subjects =) Hahaha im rude !Thank you sweety 8)
la2 seriously i swear ill do it inshallah... :)
-
Please =( You know by my name =) And then say to get A*s in all subjects =) Hahaha im rude !Thank you sweety 8)
la2 seriously i swear ill do it inshallah... :)
HAHAHAHAHHA...dont 4gt e 2 ;D
-
We love you =D <3
*We should have a heart emoticon in the forum =\ *
-
MONYYYY !!!!
ur sooo lukkky !!!!
Take me witthh you !! plzz......
anywayz.. plz pray for me tooo ....!! Pray that I get all A's and A*s in my examzzz and tht we remain frendz forever ...:D ;)
-
i wont forget anyone inshallah!! I Love you too!! BYE!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
i wont forget anyone inshallah!! I Love you too!! BYE!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
luv ya :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
thnk you matie ....!!
:-*
-
Let's make a Group Hug =*
-
lol...
group hug and kisses !! :D
-
Let's make a Group Hug =*
AAAAh dats cute :)
hugs and :-* :-* :-*
-
oookayy, its interesting where this thread reached?
u guys planning on 2000 replies?
I was gonna post a joke but then I figured out it wasn't the right thread anymore :P
-
No post one.
This thread is the top!!!
-
looooll...!!!
I supose you still can... after all its the JOKES AND RIDDLES THREAD ;D
-
OH ya u no wat i almot 4got it was ;D ****BLUSH****
-
mony knows ma name (thank God) :P lol
hahahaha........i totally forgot its about jokes....lol
-
I want to know your name ;D
-
lol. oh yeah... I never even asked wot ur name was snitty lol.. nor did I ak sweetsh
so wot r ur names guyz ...?
:P
Okay fine.. you dont have to tell me :)
-
Guess it =D
-
lolll... okay give us a hint then :P
-
ok i didnt leave yet ;D lol!!
I know the name of everyone :P
-
Welcome back sweety!
-
loool...!!!
I'd prefer it if my name didnt leak out looool....:P
-
ukh dont worry guys...lol..
i am waitin for my dad to come..lol
-
ok did u people finish studyin??
-
No =D And simply I'll be killed today!
-
yewsal bel salama :P :D lol
and i didnt start!.......i have bio on friday but i will study for the bio on monday :D lol
-
haha.... dont worry just goooo study..lol!!
i can feel it.... ;D :P
-
I can feel how u feel about studyin becuz this is how i felt it yesterday...lol!!
-
tom we should celebrate the 2000th post of this thread lol!!
i should be the one posting it ;D ;D ;D
-
this is what I'm feeling everyday!
-
ok now my dad came!!
BYE BYE PEOPLE!!LOL!! :-* :-* :-*
-
ok Iv collected a couple of jokes I'd post one after another 4 u guys...
as a blonde crawls out of her wrecked car, the local sheriff asks her what
happened.
The blonde began, "It was the strangest thing! I
Looked up and saw a tree, so I swerved to the right. Then I saw another tree,
so I swerved to left. Then there was another tree, and another and another ..."
The sheriff thought for a minute and then said, "Mama ... I don’t know how to
tell you this, but the only thing even resembling a tree on this road for thirty
miles is your air freshener"
-
OK WAIT HE WENT TO THE BATHROOM!! ;D
OK POST EAGLE!!
-
for sure u wont go to Makah to play football.........so, 3omra makboola :) :P :D lol
-
i was just playin football :P :P :P
ok thx...ill pray for all of u inshallah..now ill go then..Bye People!! Sweetsh tom ill speak to u on the messenger to tell me and i will tell u sumthin ;) ;)
lol!!ok bye!! :-* :-* :-*
-
Ok sweety! Pray for me phsyics is killing me!
-
BYEEEEE....w8 i cant blv i dont have ur email...lama terga3ee ab2a 2a5doo menek ;D
-
i g2g now ppl........cya l8r guyzz :D :D
and dont forget.....any party, is in the topic i just made! :P :D lol
-
toodles..... ;D
-
i g2g now ppl........cya l8r guyzz :D :D
and dont forget.....any party, is in the topic i just made! :P :D lol
BYEEEEE
-
lol.. and emmy... i think we shud leave tht party topis alone.... lol... thts for partying... and we were discussing abouut physics in there ...
so lets continue here ..:D
-
lol.. and emmy... i think we shud leave tht party topis alone.... lol... thts for partying... and we were discussing abouut physics in there ...
so lets continue here ..:D
HAHHAHA am a chatterbox speak abt evrythng and anythng evrywhere :D
-
lol.... u may think were all in the same boat .... but I dont think we are cuz MY BOAAAT IS SINNNNKINGG :'( :'( :'(
-
lol.... u may think were all in the same boat .... but I dont think we are cuz MY BOAAAT IS SINNNNKINGG :'( :'( :'(
amybe because ur tears r making floods :D :P
-
yeah.. maybe .. but seriously I think Im gonna start crying any minuite now ... I cant help it .... and Im so stressed out....
I havnt even started Literature yet .... :-[
-
That's not good isn't it?
-
Of course it isnt good....
But I think I can do terature even without studying..I have two hours be4 the exam where I can quickly read over anotes
-
ya definitely not gd u should relax and calm down evythng will b fynd leave physics n study literature nw :)
-
Leave physics? And study literature?
-
Leave physics? And study literature?
isnt literature needs memorizing ? ::)
-
Yes, but literature also depends on many other factors. Physics is hard =(
Anyway you know what? I got biology and additional math after tomorrow on Friday, so what do you think?
-
Yes, but literature also depends on many other factors. Physics is hard =(
Anyway you know what? I got biology and additional math after tomorrow on Friday, so what do you think?
God help u 3anjad da ana physics only and am dying :(
-
Yes I'm going to die tomorrow!
Allah ykoon b3ony ='[
-
Yes I'm going to die tomorrow!
Allah ykoon b3ony ='[
its ok isA beykoon sahl :)
-
lol. looks like im the onli one up ....!! :D
Its 2 04 am :P
-
I'm in love with physics paper 3 :P!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH
-
I'm in love with physics paper 3 :P!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH
was it that easy??
-
well not that EASY but it was easy :P
-
physics three was excellent,
not really easy, but it wasn't too hard
i feel a lot more confident about it than chemistry
-
Not hard, not east, some questions were really awfull
-
was chemistry difficult?
-
Yes!
-
chemistry wasnt chemistry this year......LOL
despite the fact that i did pretty gd in p3 chem, it was hard :P :D
-
am bk and roxy i was taking a shower at 2 04 :-X ;D
so hw was da paper...myn was fyn quite easy
-
i thought this was a jokes and riddles thread, so im just gonna say this one that i remembered which was reeely funny...
what would you say if you went downstairs in the middle of the night and saw ur tv floating in the living room?
scroll down.....
drop it ni**a!
lolz, im sorry if it was racist, but it was just a little funny.... ??? will i get slammed for this?
lolz. whatever.
-
hey shariq, stop being racist!
remember that i see u almost every day next week and tomorrow :P
-
HEY PEOPLE!!!!!!
MISSED U ALL LIKE HELL!! GLAD THAT THE PAPER WAS EASYYYY!!
AND YA SHARIQ POST UR JOKES OR RIDDLES IF U HAVE LOL!!
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i have 1 shall i say it now or wen evrybdy is here
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Hala ShouShou, how was yesterday? When are we talking?
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yalla go ahead emy, u can say it again later
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Sweetsh and eamyzz....I prayed for alll of u!! i swear even by the names..i didnt forget a single person walahi!!
we finished at 3 am and got home at 5 lol!!
and i was sleepin since then!! ;D
I just woke up and i think i am going out..but i am tired :(
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7amdelah 3ala salamtek sweety
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thx ;D
where is Roxy??!!! lol!! i went through all the posts..and it seems that u people didnt study!!lol!!
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I'm tired, and and and I got biology and additional math tomorrow! I'm supposed to be sleeping now but I couldnt =(
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actually i left quite early ;D
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me 2 am vry tired...7andelah 3ala salamtek 7ayate...3omra maqboola :)
here is da joke
da question is y do women get fat after marriage?
b4 they get married they r in love n they dont have an appetite so they leave da refrigators and go to bed
after marriage they c wats in bed.................. they go to da refrigator :P
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gtg now guys, seeya l8er!
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hahahahahahhahahaha.........:D
nice one eamy :D lol
i got bio and i didnt study a thing.....and no1 come out and tell me its p1 and no need for it, cuz my answer would be " im studying for paper 3 not paper 1" :P :D lol
hahhaha
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hahahahahahhahahaha.........:D
nice one eamy :D lol
i got bio and i didnt study a thing.....and no1 come out and tell me its p1 and no need for it, cuz my answer would be " im studying for paper 3 not paper 1" :P :D lol
hahhaha
HAHHAHAHHAHA.....enta betet5ane2 ma3 nafsak ;D :P
Thanks by da way :D
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walahy yemken........im not sure of anything anymore :D lol
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hahahaaa.am soo tired and bored and tired and bored and tired and bored and i feel more bored of writing tired and bored....
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It suites a song =D
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HAHHAHAHHAHAHAA....it would make aboring song ;D
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and the chorus will be a huge YAWN ! :D lol
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hahhahahahahaha....we elbkground sereer w mokaief sha3'al w eldabadeeb 3ala elsereer w mafeesh 3'eer noor elshams ma3 eldark curtains<<u no this thing>>
ya salam ****YAWN**** :D :P
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wt a song......when we get on stage as a band.......i start by saying.....
welcome everybo......zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
hahahahhahaha
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HHAHAHHAHHAHHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA dat would b hahhahaha cant even imagine it ;D
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it would be hilarious.....we should meet sometime and make a video of it :D lol
hahahahahahha.........:D ;D
ohh, i g2g now........cya l8r guys!! :D
one more thing, i have to....ZZZZZZZZZZZ
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HAHHAHAH....me 2 g2g i gt 2 go SHOPPING!!! ;D
and 5aaaafessshhhhh ***SHE5EER***bel masry ;D
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ay 7ad yeegy henna yedeeny +rep Grin
any1 visits this page plz gimme +rep (A) Grin
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how dee kids....:D
Wot up ?
Physics was haarrrrd.... actully I wasnt feeling well... :(
Literature was good... but I was tired ..... :(
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yup, physics was harddd, science examiner this year is stupid -.-
lit was great :D
what stories/poem did u do roxy ?
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what do u guys do in literature
write the scenarion of ROmeo and Juliet :P ?
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i do Richard III, and Things fall apart, they both are easy :)
and for the poety i did the first question, about the caged bird :P
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and how many pages did u do for each??
For Richard III(Drama) i did 2 and a half
For Things Fall Apart(Prose) i did 1 and 3/4
For Caged Bird(poetry) i did 1 and a half
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I did To Kill a Mockingbird
and.. I did As You Like it
And I did Pride and Prejudice
And for poetry I also did the Caged Bird one...
we had to do 4 questions...
Im rly upset about physics tho.. :(
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what do u guys do in literature?
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lol i do only 3 *phew*
and yea im upset cuz of physics, i even thought i would of got an A if they didnt change the question styles :(
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what do u guys do in literature?
u read a book or passage, and they give u a question and u talk about it, looks much harder than it seems, and u have to write essays and stuff, the use of language and info must also be very clear and high, and u have to look for quotes in the whole book to support ur answer, which isnt easy :P
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so its an open book test?
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sum are... myn wasnt .... :(
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sum are... myn wasnt .... :(
what do u mean? :S
the one u did today wasnt open book?
mine was
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yeahhh me did open book too.. ummmm dont we all do open books? .. anyhowss.. i did caged bird toooo! that wa sthe easiest .. didnt even bother looking at other stuff! ahaha.. n yeah my crucible essay was awesome ..( chek out bragging about my ownself.. ) but MashaAllah .. Alhamdullilah ..
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ok, so what papers do y'all have left?
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Additional math paper2
Biology papers 1&3
Chemistry Paper 1
Physics Paper 1
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ok, so what papers do y'all have left?
Bio P1 + P3
Phys P1
Chem P1
and then ... SUMMER !! ;D
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damn ur lucky yusef, i got that plus eco 1 and 2
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7aram Omer =[
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Bio p1 & p3
chem P1
FREEDOM!!!!! hahahahha :P
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You dont have additional tomorrow =(
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only got 3 more :D
a lit, 2 p1s chem and phy
i bet chem and phy will be hard, like 6 and 3 :'(
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someone is very sleepy today Zz
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You dont have additional tomorrow =(
naaaaaah :P :D
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I dont mind 8)
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Got Caught
A brunette, a redhead and a blonde all work in the same office with the same female boss. Every day, they noticed the boss left work early.
One day, the girls decided that when the boss left, they‘d leave right behind her. After all, she never called or came back, so how was she to know?
The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening and went to bed early.
The redhead was elated to be able to get in a quick workout at her spa before meeting a dinner date.
The blonde was happy, happy, happy to be home, but when she got to her bedroom she heard a muffled noise from inside.
Slowly, quietly, she cracked open the door and was mortified to see her husband in bed with HER BOSS!!! Ever so gently, she closed the door and crept out of her house.
The next day, during their coffee break, the brunette and redhead mentioned leaving early again, and asked the blonde if she was with them.
“NO WAY,“ she exclaimed. “I almost got caught yesterday!“
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hehe, i wish i had a blonde wife :P
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Handy Women
A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a “handy-woman“ and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.
“Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,“ he said, “How much will you charge me?“
The blonde quickly responded, “How about $50?“ The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need were in the garage.
The man‘s wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, “Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?“
He responded, “That‘s a bit cynical, isn‘t it?“
The wife replied, “You‘re right. I guess I‘m starting to believe all those ‘dumb blonde‘ jokes we‘ve been getting by e-mail lately.“
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
“You‘re finished already?“ the husband asked.
“Yes,“ the blonde replied, “and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats.“
Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it to her.
“And by the way,“ the blonde added, “it‘s not a Porch, it‘s a Lexus.“
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Aboud likes a blonde girls as it seems so =D
Q80BOY is it because of the joke hahaha?
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Abood is very sleepy today, and it is only 8.30
Abood is also hungry
Abood likes this 3rd person talking
and Abood is going to post another good joke, so enjoy peeps :P
Clever Women
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them is hurt. God works in Mysterious ways.
After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, “So you‘re a man. That‘s interesting. I‘m a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There‘s nothing left, but we‘re unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days“.
Flattered, the man replies, “Oh yes, I agree with you completely, this must be a sign from God!“
The woman continues, “And look at this, here‘s another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn‘t break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.“ Then she hands the bottle to the man.
The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.
The man asks, “Aren‘t you having any?“
The woman replies, “No. I think I‘ll just wait for the police.... “
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Aboud likes a blonde girls as it seems so =D
Q80BOY is it because of the joke hahaha?
lol, duuh :P jk
and gr8 jokes 7amany !! ;)
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okes Of Mr. Bean
1) BRAIN TUMOR:
Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.
Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)
Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you?
Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb?
Doctor: Then why are you so happy?
Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!
2) MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL:
Teacher: What is 5 plus 4?
Mr. Bean: 9
Teacher: What is 4 plus 5?
Mr. Bean: Are you trying to fool me, you've just twisted the figure, the
answer is 6!!
3) WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:
Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.
Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?
Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!
4) AT AN ATM MACHINE:
Friend: What are you looking at?
Mr. Bean: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.
Friend: Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?
Mr. Bean: four asterisks (****)!
5) Marriage:
Friend: How many women do you believe must a man marry?
Mr. Bean: 16
Friend: Why?
Mr. Bean: Because the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4worse.
6) CHATTING WITH HIS FRIEND:
Friend: How was the tape you borrowed from me, is it Ok?
Mr. Bean: What do you mean ok, I thought it's a horror film. I didn't see
any picture.
Friend: What tape did you took anyway?
Mr. Bean: Head Cleaner.
7)DEATH OF HIS MOTHER:
Mr. Bean:(crying) the doctor called, Mom's dead.
Friend: condolence, my friend.
(After 2 minutes) Mr. Bean cries even louder
Friend: what now?
Mr. Bean: my sister just called, her mom died too!
8) MR. BEAN ATTENDING A MEETING:
Colleague: Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs because of a
power failure.
Mr. Bean: That's alright, me too...I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.
9) Spelling lesson:
Mr. Bean's Son: Dad, what is the spelling of successful.. ..is it one c or
two c?
Mr. Bean: Make it three c to be sure!
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Aboud likes a blonde girls as it seems so =D
Q80BOY is it because of the joke hahaha?
lol, duuh :P jk
and gr8 jokes 7amany !! ;)
thanx :P
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my sylabus is closed books 0486/04 and so thts why.. but If we all had the same paper... then why is one open and the other closed?
and why did we do closed books...?
and for ur open book did you guyz have your own notes in ur own books ?
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:P
A blonde went out to her mail box and looked in, closed the door and went back in the house. A few minutes later she went out and looked in the mail box again.
She did this several times and her neighbour that was watching her said: 'You must be expecting a very important letter today the way you keep looking into your mail box.'
The blonde answered, 'No, I am working on my computer and it keeps telling me that I have mail.'
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loooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
keep em comming 7amany !! they're making my day :P
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my sylabus is closed books 0486/04 and so thts why.. but If we all had the same paper... then why is one open and the other closed?
and why did we do closed books...?
and for ur open book did you guyz have your own notes in ur own books ?
open book is 0486/01, and if u have notes u get disquallified, but i had a few :P
and my book for Rochard III was amazinggggggggggggg it had the shakespearian english, and on the other side it had the modern english, and at the back it talks about everything the question asked about the guy :P
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haha wouldnt this be nice :P
In the city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful blonde was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step on the bus.
Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver she reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. Again she tried to make the step onto the bus only to discover she still couldn't! So, a little more embarrassed she once again reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little more and for a second time attempted the step and once again, much to her chagrin she could not raise her leg because of the tight skirt. So, with a coy little smile to the driver she again unzipped the offending skirt to give a little more slack and again was unable to make the step.
About this time the big Texan that was behind her in the line picked her up easily from the waist and placed her lightly on the step of the bus Well, she went ballistic and turned on the would-be hero screeching at him 'How dare you touch my body!! I don't even know who you are!'
At this the Texan drawled 'Well ma'am normally I would agree with you but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we was friends.'
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u guys r crazy with BLONDS!! :P :D lol
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I can notice that!
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u guys r crazy with BLONDS!! :P :D lol
well appearantly they make the best jokes !
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the best jokes and the best looks :P :D lol
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the best jokes and the best looks :P :D lol
Haha i was going to say that then thought someone would get jelous :P
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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door open, but they just couldn't! The blonde with the coat hanger stopped for a moment to catch her breath. The other blonde said anxiously, 'Hurry up! It's starting to rain and the top is down.'
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Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus.
So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, “Why don‘t you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy.“
The blind man replies, “If you would‘ve put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick, we‘d be riding the bus so shut up.“
:P
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the best jokes and the best looks :P :D lol
Haha i was going to say that then thought someone would get jelous :P
hahahahahahahha..........guess they already did :D :P hahaha
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the best jokes and the best looks :P :D lol
Haha i was going to say that then thought someone would get jelous :P
hahahahahahahha..........guess they already did :D :P hahaha
wt should i say 2 u guyz....................................
.
.
..
...
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u guyz r gone CRAZY.... llol nyc jokez keep it up ;)
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any blondes in this forum? lol
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this place is anti-blonds :D lol
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any blondes in this forum? lol
I hope not, they wouldnt survive our "floods" of blonde jokes.
Its like we massacered them all XD
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u know, i've always thought that girls (esp blondes) are vindictive, and wudnt be letting us take shots at them like that
but this forum proved to me that girls' talking is only quantity, no quality about it :p
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Get outta here mate....:P :P
wot u chatting about.... Its called "Not wasting our Time" :P
We know we're better... so theres no need to argue about it ...:P
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5/5 :P:P
A young female teacher was giving an assignment to her 6th grade class. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard.
Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the boys in the class. She quickly turned and asked, “What‘s so funny Bobby?“
“Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters.“
“Get out of my classroom,“ she yells, “I don‘t want to see you for three days!“
The teacher turns back to the chalkboard. Realizing she had forgotten to title the assignment; she reaches to the very top of the chalkboard. Suddenly there is an even louder giggle from another male student.
She quickly turns and asks, “What‘s so funny Billy?“
“Well teacher, I just saw BOTH of your garters.“ Again she yells, “Get out of my classroom!“ This time the punishment is more severe, and tells him - “I don‘t want to see you for three weeks!“ Embarrassed and frustrated, she drops the eraser when she turns around again.
So she bends over to pick it up. This time there is a burst of laughter from another male student. She quickly turns to see Little Johnny leaving the classroom.
“And where do you think you are going?“ she asks.
“Well teach, from what I just saw, my school days are over!“ :P:P:P:P:P
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lol,
i wonder what he saw :P
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lol,
i wonder what he saw :P
hmm must be good :P
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Definition of Tragedy
President Bush was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.
The teacher asked the President if he would like to lead the discussion on the word “tragedy“ so the illustrious leader asked the class for an example of “tragedy“.
One little boy stood up and offered..“if my best friend, who lives on a farm is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a tragedy.“
“No“ said Bush, “that would be an accident“.
A little girl raised her hand. “ If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy.“
‘Im afraid not‘ explained the President “that‘s what we would call a great loss“
The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Bush searched the room “Isn‘t there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy“?
Finally at the back of the room a small boy raised his hand. In a quiet voice he said “If Air Force One, carrying you and Mrs. Bush was struck by a “friendly fire“ missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy.“
“Fantastic“! exclaimed Bush. “That‘s right, and can you tell me why that would be a tragedy“?
“Well“ says the boy - “it has to be a tragedy, because it certainly wouldn‘t be a great loss and it probably wouldn‘t be an accident either“.
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haha, lol, imagine bush's face at that moment :P
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The townspeople did a little research and discovered they could get a cow from Moscow for 2000 rubles - or one from Minsk for only 1000 rubles. So, naturally, they got the cow from Minsk. It was a great cow had a wonderful disposition, and gave lots of milk and lots of cream. Everybody loved it dearly. The people decided they would mate the cow and get more cows like it, and then they would never have to worry about their milk supply again. So they got a bull and led the cow and the bull into the pasture. When the bull came in from the right to mount the cow, the cow moved to the left. When the bull moved in to mount the cow from the left, the cow moved to the right. This went on all day.
Finally, in desperation, the people decided to go ask the rabbi what to do. After all he was very wise.
They told him the story. 'Rabbi, we've tried all day to mate our cow. When the bull moves in from the right the cow moves left and when the bull moves in from the left the cow moves to the right. What do we do?'
The Rabbi thought a moment and asked, 'Did you buy this cow from Minsk?'
'Rabbi!' they replied as one, 'You are so wise! We never said we bought the cow from Minsk. How did you know that?'
The Rabbi said, sadly, 'My wife is from Minsk.'
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ahahaha, sad story :P
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Little Johnny’s sitting on the street corner playin with battery acid, when a priest walked up and said, “Johnny, you should play with holy water instead.” Little Johnny says, “Why is that?”. The priest replies, “I put holy water on a pregnant lady and she passed a baby”.
Little Johnny says to the priest, “That ain’t sh*t. I put battery acid on a cat’s A** and he passed a Volkswagon!”
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HEY PEOPLE!!!!
I JUST CAME FROM OUTSIDE LOL!!
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HEY PEOPLE!!!!
I JUST CAME FROM OUTSIDE LOL!!
HEYYYY u missed loads of group hugs but u were neva missed out soo how r u ???
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Welcome back sweety we missed you.
Group Hug and Kisses with ShouShou
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HEY PEOPLE!!!!
I JUST CAME FROM OUTSIDE LOL!!
HEYYYY u missed loads of group hugs but u were neva missed out soo how r u ???
OH REALLY??!!! :( :'( I MISSED U ALL!! :(
YES GROUP HUG AND KISSES!!!
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Yes Group hugs n Kisses to u 2 :-* :-* :-*
luv u all loadz :-* :-*
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miss yall all...its bn sam tym since i came hear...i av had a buzi week...n i cant believ its almost over
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heyy lil^star!! we missed u too!!
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am bak after a long shopping day i went 2 evry shopping center that may come in ur mind <<<< not really>> bs i went 2 tooo many malls :D
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heyyyyyy eamyzz!!
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hw r ya miss ya like hell i cant blv i want c u 5alas :'(
bs hopefully we will arrange an outing :)
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lazem..ma3 mona we nas dii lol!! ;D
today ana kaman went shoppin...i was like out from 3 pm till 9pm.....walahi...ukh i was really tired :(
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lazem..ma3 mona we nas dii lol!! ;D
today ana kaman went shoppin...i was like out from 3 pm till 9pm.....walahi...ukh i was really tired :(
ana men 4 30 till nw imagine n i have flat foot fa i cant press on ma foot nw :'(
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haha eda begad..i never relined that u have flat foot..lol!!
wat r u doing now??!!
i am planning to watch a movie... ;D
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haha eda begad..i never relined that u have flat foot..lol!!
wat r u doing now??!!
i am planning to watch a movie... ;D
ya i no it doesnt rlly show bs wen i walk keteeeer mosh ba2dar amshy 3aleeha w bab2a zay elmo3aka ;D
bs YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!! which movie ??
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i have many...still didnt choose :-\
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ana mosh 3arfa momken atfarag 3ala madaraset elmosha3'been ;D
I LUV IT
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haha u watch arabic??!!
ana kolo english lol!!
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i watch both <<<e7na lessa arabs :D :P>>>
bs i admitt i luv english more bs fee arabic gd bardo :D
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i watch both <<<e7na lessa arabs :D :P>>>
bs i admitt i luv english more bs fee arabic gd bardo :D
latest arabic films r good...i watch them in the cinema...i want to watch OMAR WE SALMA 2!
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HEY GTG WATCH A MOVIE!! ;D
BYEEEE!! :-*
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BYE :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
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One morning the husband leaves for work and the blonde gets up. She's determined to prove to her husband that blondes arn't dumb, by painting the kitchen.
When her husband gets home he says to his wife "Honey why do you have 3 coats on?"
The blonde says, "Well the directions on the paint said to use three coats for best results."
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One day a blonde walks into a car shop. She looks around to see if she can find the perfect car for herself.
She finds a beautiful car with fine leather, but as she bends over to feel it she lets out a fart!
She looks around to see if anyone noticed, but as she turns she sees the sales guy is behind her so she askes him "How much is this car"
He replies back "Miss, If you farted just by touching the leather you're going to sh*t yourself when hear the price
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hahahahahahahahhahahaha..........................lol
+ rep for the 1st one :D llol
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hahah :P
A blonde and a brunett where on ther way to heaven and the brunette asked the blonde "how did you die" ?
The blonde said "I had a heart attack, how about you"
And the brunette says "I froze to death, what caused your heart attack"
The blonde said "It started when I came home from work and I saw a womans car in the drive way"
"I rushed in to the house and asked my husband where are you hiding her"
"He said hiding who, but I started looking around the house, I was so angry I dropped to the floor."
Finally the brunette says "Damn!! If you had just looked in the freezer we'd both have lived.
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There are three moms. .
A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde.
They were all talking one day and the brunette says "Oh my gosh y'all I went through my daughter's purse the other day to get some gum, and I found an ounce of weed. I cannot believe she smokes weed"
They comfort her, and the redhead says "Yeah, well I found a fake I. D. In my daughter's purse. I cannot believe she has one". So they all comfort her.
Then the blonde says "That's nothing. I found a condom in my daughter's purse. I just cannot believe she has a penis"
I know its a lil rude but funny hehe
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hahah :P
A blonde and a brunett where on ther way to heaven and the brunette asked the blonde "how did you die" ?
The blonde said "I had a heart attack, how about you"
And the brunette says "I froze to death, what caused your heart attack"
The blonde said "It started when I came home from work and I saw a womans car in the drive way"
"I rushed in to the house and asked my husband where are you hiding her"
"He said hiding who, but I started looking around the house, I was so angry I dropped to the floor."
Finally the brunette says "Damn!! If you had just looked in the freezer we'd both have lived.
funny lool ;D
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Shopping for a Husband
A store that sells husbands has just opened where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is composed of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights.
There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.
So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.
On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men have jobs.
The woman reads the sign and says to herself, "Well, that's better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what's further up?" So up she goes.
The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.
The woman remarks to herself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?" And up she goes again.
The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking.
"Hmmm, better" she says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?"
The fourth floor sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework.
"Wow!" exclaims the woman, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up!" And again she heads up another flight.
The fifth floor sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak.
"Oh, mercy me! But just think... what must be awaiting me further on?" So up to the sixth floor she goes.
The sixth floor sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 6,875,953,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.
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I Don't Think So!
Kate was standing in the kitchen cooking dinner.
Her husband Paul was in the living room drinking a beer and watching the game.
"Honey, you need to come in here and fix the fridge. The door is broke and if you don't fix it the food will go bad." Kate said.
Paul yells back, "Who do I look like the GE man, I Don't think so."
A little while later Kate says, "Honey, you need to fix the hall light, it's out."
"Who do I look like an electrician, I don't think so, " Paul says.
A few minutes later Kate says, "Honey, you need to fix the porch step before someone gets hurt on it."
Paul quickly replies, "Who do I look like a carpenter, I don't think so."
Frustrated, he gets up and leaves.
He decides to go to a bar down the road.
After the game was over, he began to feel slightly guilty for the way he treated his wife so he went on home.
He comes up the porch and realizes that the step is fixed.
He walked into the house and noticed that the hall light was fixed.
He walked into the kitchen to get a cold beer and noticed that the fridge was fixed.
Paul sees his wife and says, "Babe, how did you fix all this."
She looked at him and said, "Well after you left I began to cry on the porch.
A fine young man walked past and noticed I was crying and he asked me what he could do to help.
He fixed everything.
I asked him what I could do for payment.
He said I could either bake him a cake or sleep with him."
Paul says, "Well, what kind of cake did you bake him?"
Kate looks at him and replies, "Who do I look like Betty Crocker, I don't think so!" :P
-
A young woman said to her doctor, "You have to help me, I hurt all over."
"What do you mean?" said the doctor.
The woman touched her right knee with her index finger and yelled, "Ow, that hurts." Then she touched her left cheek and again yelled, "Ouch! That hurts, too." Then she touched her right earlobe. "Ow, even THAT hurts."
The doctor asked the woman, "Are you a natural blonde?"
"Why yes," she said.
"I thought so," said the doctor... "You have a sprained finger."
Enough jokes for now, ill let u read em first :P
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ppl r -repping me cuz im trying to organise the topics!....
they try to cheat, i lock topics and warn them.....and they -rep me! :(
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ppl r -repping me cuz im trying to organise the topics!....
they try to cheat, i lock topics and warn them.....and they -rep me! :(
+rep then :D
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Shopping for a Husband
A store that sells husbands has just opened where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is composed of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights.
There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.
So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.
On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men have jobs.
The woman reads the sign and says to herself, "Well, that's better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what's further up?" So up she goes.
The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.
The woman remarks to herself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?" And up she goes again.
The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking.
"Hmmm, better" she says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?"
The fourth floor sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework.
"Wow!" exclaims the woman, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up!" And again she heads up another flight.
The fifth floor sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak.
"Oh, mercy me! But just think... what must be awaiting me further on?" So up to the sixth floor she goes.
The sixth floor sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 6,875,953,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.
funny but true sometimes!! We are easy to please!!hahahaha
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+rep :)
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Thanks guys :)
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hey peeps ... ;D
wot up ?
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not much :D lol
i got my exam in 3 hours :D
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yeah same here...
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Same here...waiting for my exam!!
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yeah same here...
TWINS even in exams :D :P hahahaha
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hehe.... lool...
and yes IG Girl... for sum reason Im waiting for my exam too...
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lool...!
dont wonder too much...:P
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And abdu... u weren't here for yesterdays party.... s you must attend todays okay....?
it starts at 8 00
loool..
dont forget too bring ur repps with you ...:P
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i too will bring it..
lol
dont forget to spread some over my direction too
haha
hey guys
best of luck
do well
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lool. dont worry mate..!!
my bag is full ov repps to spread over anyone who attends the parties ;D
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haha ok, i was busy :P
whos party is it ? :P
and 8.00 what zone ?
haha ok, gl to u 2 rox !!
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tata...c ya
best of luck
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we r +3 GMT :D lol
dont forget the reps! :P
its in the place of invitation card......no reps no enter !! :P :D hahaha
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Good Morning people!! Ur probably still in da exam :P best of luck to all inshalla!! :)
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Good Morning people!! Ur probably still in da exam :P best of luck to all inshalla!! :)
hey shosh, ur not the only 1 :P
i dont do bio shosh, cant talk cuz im saving it for the party :P
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hey ABDO!! how was ur paper??!!
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heyyyy 1 post till the 800!! do it in the party thread when they come..u can keep on modifying ur last post if u want..
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lol!! u dont do bio!! goooood!! delete some of ur old posts!!!
congrats!! to be the first one who said that!! :P :P :P
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Did I miss anything?
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HEY!!!!!!! HOW WAS THE PAPERS?!!!!!!
NO U DIDNT MISS ANYTHING ACTUALLY NON OF THEM CAME ONLINE!!LOL!!
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Yes, I'm so tired i've been at the center since 8:00 till 2:15 I AM SO TIRED =(
The papers were good!!! IMAGINE!! The biology was really good, the additional math wasnt bad at all!! Easier than Paper 1. Hope everything will be great..
How did you spend your day?
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oh really!! good alhamdolilah...
ummmm my day!! i slept at fajir...woke up at zuhor...ate....did half of a chemistry paper1...now reading a manga online ;D
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Good =]
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i think everyone is sleeeeepin after da bio....i wonder where is roxy she usually comes online after the exam..weird
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gd morning :D
hw did u guys do....hope it was easy :)
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Good morning?
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haha hey eamy!! tab3an konti naima!!haha!!
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I'm going to be mostly offline today, have a rest =D
I love you all <3
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ok...have a nice day!!
love u too!! :-* :-* :-*
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dont 4gt 2 com at 8 partaaaaaaaaaaay ;D
1 more post 4 da 400th post...YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!! and ya i slept at 6 am yesterday n jst woke up ;D
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I AM BOREDDD N THIS THREAD IS SUPPOSE TO MAKE ME LAUGHHH>> ENTERTAINEEMENTTT PPPPLLL ENTERTAINEMENTTTT!
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yes yes!!!
wher r de funnies??
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I AM HERE .. who's askin for me.. h3h3..
SUPERMAN TO THE RESCUE!!
ayte.. very lame.. urrgh.. boredom does that
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Civic Lesson
In a high school civics class, they were discussing the qualifications for becoming President of the United States. The requirements are pretty simple. The candidate must be a natural born citizen and at least 35 years old.
A blonde girl in the class piped up and began complaining about how unfair it was to require the candidate to be a natural born citizen. In her opinion, that made it impossible for many qualified people to run for the office. She went on and on, wrapping up her argument with "What makes a natural born citizen more qualified to be President than one born by C-Section?"
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I AM HERE .. who's askin for me.. h3h3..
SUPERMAN TO THE RESCUE!!
ayte.. very lame.. urrgh.. boredom does that
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand we got ..
BATMAN!!
go RIX!!
=P
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Civic Lesson
In a high school civics class, they were discussing the qualifications for becoming President of the United States. The requirements are pretty simple. The candidate must be a natural born citizen and at least 35 years old.
A blonde girl in the class piped up and began complaining about how unfair it was to require the candidate to be a natural born citizen. In her opinion, that made it impossible for many qualified people to run for the office. She went on and on, wrapping up her argument with "What makes a natural born citizen more qualified to be President than one born by C-Section?"
hahahahaha!!
l0ollzz!!
nyc!!
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Parachute Jumping
On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blonde listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet.
The blonde asked, "How am I supposed to know when I'm at 300 feet?"
"That's a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground."
After pondering his answer, she asked, "What happens if there's no one there I know?"
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hey people!!! ya this thread should be havin some jokes and riddles!!
WAY TO GO KIM..KEEP POSTIN!!
I GET SOME RIDDLES FOR U!! ;D
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What Kind of Tracks Are They?
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks.
The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks."
The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks."
The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks."
The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them.
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^ ahahahahahahahaha .. blondes.. rht.. u know not all blondes are tht dumb .. why are ppl so prejudicial?
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Proof That Blondes Are Not Really Dumb
This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all the blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart.
Blonde Jokes
While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house.
The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand.
Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and detects the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat.
He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time. He goes over and asks her if she is OK.
She replies, "Yes."
He asks what she is doing.
She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting the house.
He then asks her why she has on a ski jacket and a fur coat.
She replies that she was reading the directions on the paint can and they said, "For best results, put on two coats."
joke i don't think blondes are dumb but the jokes are good!
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yeahh shoushou .. riddles if u got em ..
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ok here:
If you have me, you want to share me. If you share me, you haven't got me. What am I?
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urgh this cud never get more boring..
but kim did enjoy them <3
kk
this is soo funny.. cus its soooooooo damn lame..
What colour is a burp.. ??
Ans.. :
Burple
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ok try this
a plane takes 1.5 hours to go from A to B but on the same flight bak it takes 90 minutes why?
-
ok here:
If you have me, you want to share me. If you share me, you haven't got me. What am I?
a secret??
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ok try this
a plane takes 1.5 hours to go from A to B but on the same flight bak it takes 90 minutes why?
lol
1.5 hours IS 90 mins .. wht this?
-
ok try this
a plane takes 1.5 hours to go from A to B but on the same flight bak it takes 90 minutes why?
lol
1.5 hours IS 90 mins .. wht this?
haha thats the answer
i heard this on tv and the answers ppl gave were so weird
sum said air resistance sum said traffic and the host was laughing his head off!!!!!!!!!!
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ok try this
a plane takes 1.5 hours to go from A to B but on the same flight bak it takes 90 minutes why?
lol
1.5 hours IS 90 mins .. wht this?
haha thats the answer
i heard this on tv and the answers ppl gave were so weird
sum said air resistance sum said traffic and the host was laughing his head off!!!!!!!!!!
yea i saw it on tv too
on a pakistani IQ show ..
it ws funny
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ok here:
If you have me, you want to share me. If you share me, you haven't got me. What am I?
a secret??
WE GOT A WINNER!!+REP FOR U!!
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ok here:
If you have me, you want to share me. If you share me, you haven't got me. What am I?
a secret??
WE GOT A WINNER!!+REP FOR U!!
lol =D
ok igear WHT THIS???
WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU??
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eisha.. hav fun
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eisha.. hav fun
funny
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HALLO EVERYONE!
How was the bio paper?
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bio paper.. not so bad.. urs
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i am here.. ts just yall are ebing not fun!
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what does an elf learn at skul??
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not bad, how about u reham?
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ahhh .. not bad .. okay .. got one rong so far .. but prolly theres more.. sighs
anyways at loco .. heheh.. by flying? (lol elfs dont fly.. pixies do..)
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what does an elf learn at skul??
making toys ?? :P
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@ loco, give a hint!
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umm somethn to do with letters
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an elfabet!! hehehehe
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rht???
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crypss.. <3 nice.. elfapet..
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u cheaaateeer.. u googled it didncha..!!!
and By the way.. i kno its lame.. but dont decrease my rep.. pls pity me.. cus its alreadi tooo low.. =[
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lol
loco ur just on ur 26th post and u already got +4 rep,
look at my count, and my rep :D
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lol
loco ur just on ur 26th post and u already got +4 rep,
look at my count, and my rep :D
yea.. but its proli cus ppl - repd u..
i'll + u.. hehe.. <3
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ok, heres a riddle, actually a brain-teaser (guys/gals don't google!)
Mary was working in a chemistry lab with a mixture of chemicals that was 90% water and weighed 20 pounds. After returning to the lab from a weekend break, she calculated the mixture was now 50% water. How much does the mixture now weigh? For purposes of this puzzle, assume the non-water part of the mixture was not affected by evaporation.?
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lol
loco ur just on ur 26th post and u already got +4 rep,
look at my count, and my rep :D
yea.. but its proli cus ppl - repd u..
i'll + u.. hehe.. <3
thanks :)
bumped you up too
and yea, i usually get -repped for nothing!
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HAHHAHAHAHAHa......alll ur jokes n riddles were nyc...+rep 2 evry1 here...
and this makes ma 400ths post isA soon i will celebrate ma 600ths ;D
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CONGRATULATIONS ON POST 400
(waita minute, wus the point of having a party thread?, oh well hu cares :P )
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hehe Yea m nice that way..!!
and ppl did it to me too.. =[ .. and i hardli posted anythn ='[
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ok, heres a riddle, actually a brain-teaser (guys/gals don't google!)
Mary was working in a chemistry lab with a mixture of chemicals that was 90% water and weighed 20 pounds. After returning to the lab from a weekend break, she calculated the mixture was now 50% water. How much does the mixture now weigh? For purposes of this puzzle, assume the non-water part of the mixture was not affected by evaporation.?
Chemistry everywher... !!!! urgh!!
kk.. m proli rong..
but
90:20
50:x
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ok, heres a riddle, actually a brain-teaser (guys/gals don't google!)
Mary was working in a chemistry lab with a mixture of chemicals that was 90% water and weighed 20 pounds. After returning to the lab from a weekend break, she calculated the mixture was now 50% water. How much does the mixture now weigh? For purposes of this puzzle, assume the non-water part of the mixture was not affected by evaporation.?
lol
that was NOT unintentional :P
anyways, if u ppl think its too obnoxious to have a chemistry teaser, i can always get another one ;D
Chemistry everywher... !!!! urgh!!
kk.. m proli rong..
but
90:20
50:x
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ahahahaha.. anywyas.. I got one .. ts lame but anwyays
What do Polar Bears vote for?
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vacations in hawaii?
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CONGRATULATIONS ON POST 400
(waita minute, wus the point of having a party thread?, oh well hu cares :P )
Thanks OT13 ....and am jst informing evry1 we have 2 combined partys 2day in da partaays thread 4rm 8-9pm ladies should come in dresses and guys in suites
the price 4 da ticket is +rep ;D :P
feel free to contact da organiser Miss Shoushou 4 any details and her assistant ME ;D
c ya all there :D
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ahahaha... party? lol in the forums? ahahaha .. sure ill be there with my jet black shiny Porsche ..
ppl answer my quesstioN! =[
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haha!! CONGTRATZ EAMY!!
OPPSSSS...THAT WAS MY 1100TH POST LOL!!
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ahahaha... party? lol in the forums? ahahaha .. sure ill be there with my jet black shiny Porsche ..
ppl answer my quesstioN! =[
the north/south poll
whtevr they liv on
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ahahaha... party? lol in the forums? ahahaha .. sure ill be there with my jet black shiny Porsche ..
ppl answer my quesstioN! =[
lool c ya dere u will directly notice wid ma black LIMO ;D
SHOUSHOU Thanks :-* :-* :-* :-*
let me give it a try if its lame it will have a lame answer so other pola bears ;D :P :P
no seriously give a hint
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Yeahh Reishaaaa.. matssiessss.. u got it.. =]
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haha!! CONGTRATZ EAMY!!
OPPSSSS...THAT WAS MY 1100TH POST LOL!!
congratssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
ok ur party will b held wid our party tonight b prepared ;D
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@ Eammyz.. i woulda given a hint man.. but ts lame gosh dint knwo what to say .. hehe anyways rht meet u thr!
anyways got another onee! What do Ghosts write with?
as lame as last one..
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lol, ok, now ama give a riddle:
Four men were in a boat on the lake. The boat turns over, and all four men sink to the bottom of the lake, yet not a single man got wet! Why?
oh and COngrats Shush, seeya in the party ;D
(p.s., payment sent to the party organizer as well as her assistant ;) )
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ok here is one:
I arrive once in every second, once in every minute and once in every year. What am I?
haha....i dont want to party lol!! i already did one for my 1000..lol!!
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ok, @Shush:an instant?
@cryps: light pens?
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an E @shushu
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no omer....ok wait lets solve one riddle at a time...srry i didnt see crps riddle..so solve it first
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an E @shushu
hmmmmm u googled it!! :P
Anyway he is the winner people!! +Rep for him.. and here is the answer to explain more..
The letter "e" (sEcond, minutE, yEar). :P :P :P
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i swear i didn gooogle it.. but its old..
kinda new it.. me.. ggenius.. hehe
+ rep me..! YAAAAAAAAY
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so yea cryps, am i ryte or wrong?
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Children's Answers to Science Exam Questions
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.
Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorised? (e.g., abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O and U.
Q: What is the Fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.
Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.
Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.
Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport
Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.
Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
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Birthday Lift (i hope its not over-rated :P)
A woman gets a facelift for her 47th birthday. On her way home, she stops at a newsstand and asks the sales clerk, “How old do you think I am?”
“About 32,” the clerk replies.
“I’m actually 47,” the woman says.
She then goes into McDonald’s and asks the cashier the same question. “I’d guess about 29,” she says.
“Nope, I’m 47,” the woman replies.
Later, as she waits for the bus, she asks an old man the same question. “I’m 78,” he says, “and my eyesight is starting to go. But when I was young, you could determine a woman’s age by putting your hand up her shirt and feeling her boobs.”
Curiosity getting the best of her, she says, “What the hell, go ahead.” He slips his hand up her shirt and, after a few minutes, says, “You’re 47.”
“That’s amazing!” she says, stunned. “How did you know?”
“I was behind you in line at McDonald’s.”
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Shoshou..ur topic is gettin on g8..but do u think it has an end?? :P
m nt askin cuz m sick of this topic but jst wonderin if has any end?
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hahaha..KHEY!! ur not sick of my topic??!! wow!!!
i don't know if its gonna end..it depends on the people who post in it... :P
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no its not gonna end !! why should it end ?? :P its fun and time consuming
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and maybe i can remove it...but i dont think i will :P
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and maybe i can remove it...but i dont think i will :P
lol, dont remove it !! >:(
where would i post my lame jokes then ?? :P
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Two hydrogen atoms
Two hydrogen atoms in a bar.
One says to the other 'I've lost my electron'.
'That's terrible' says the other 'Are you sure?'.
'I'm positive'
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and maybe i can remove it...but i dont think i will :P
lol, dont remove it !! >:(
where would i post my lame jokes then ?? :P
haha..i like ur jokes keep postin..actually i was about to post a comment about the age joke haha...but i saw khey's question...lol
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Missing Wife
A guy walks up to a beautiful woman in a shopping mall. "Excuse me" he says "But I've lost my wife here somewhere and I can't find her. Could you please help me?"
"What do you need me to do?" asks the woman.
"Just stand here and talk to me" the man replies.
"How's that going to help?" she asks
"I don't know exactly, but every time I talk to a woman with your'e beauty, my wife appears out of no where!"
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Council workers
There were two fellas working for the city council, one would dig a hole, the other would follow behind him and fill it in. They worked furiously all day without rest, one guy digging a hole, the other guy filling it in again.
An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing. So he asked the hole digger, "I appreciate the effort you're putting into your work, but what's the story? You dig a hole and your partner follows behind and fills it up again.
The hole digger wiped his brow and sighed, "Well, normally we're a three-man team, but the bloke who plants the trees is sick today."
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A blonde in a canoe
A blonde is driving down the road in the country and spots another blonde, in a canoe, in a wheat field, rowing like crazy.
She slams on the brakes and rolls down the window and yells to the woman,"What are you doing? You're in a field! "
The woman stops briefly to listen and then returns to rowing like mad.
Angry because she's been ignored she yells again,"Hey! Stop that! You're making us blondes look dumb."
Ignored again the blonde in the car yells," You're lucky I can't swim or I'd come out there and kick your A**!"
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A blonde in a canoe
A blonde is driving down the road in the country and spots another blonde, in a canoe, in a wheat field, rowing like crazy.
She slams on the brakes and rolls down the window and yells to the woman,"What are you doing? You're in a field! "
The woman stops briefly to listen and then returns to rowing like mad.
Angry because she's been ignored she yells again,"Hey! Stop that! You're making us blondes look dumb."
Ignored again the blonde in the car yells," You're lucky I can't swim or I'd come out there and kick your A**!"
what country..
hahaha
mm bored =[
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A Blonde Decides To Go Horseback Riding
A blonde decides to go horseback riding, even though she has had no Lessons or prior experience. She selects a placid looking horse, pays her money and mounts the horse unassisted (though with some difficulty). The horse springs into action. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic rate. The blonde starts to slip from the smooth saddle. In terror she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck; but she slides down the side of the horse. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try to throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot had become entangled in the stirrup and she strikes the ground again and again. Her head is battered against the ground .. she is moments away from unconsciousness when.....
The Woolworths manager rushes out and turns it off!
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A Blonde Decides To Go Horseback Riding
A blonde decides to go horseback riding, even though she has had no Lessons or prior experience. She selects a placid looking horse, pays her money and mounts the horse unassisted (though with some difficulty). The horse springs into action. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic rate. The blonde starts to slip from the smooth saddle. In terror she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck; but she slides down the side of the horse. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try to throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot had become entangled in the stirrup and she strikes the ground again and again. Her head is battered against the ground .. she is moments away from unconsciousness when.....
The Woolworths manager rushes out and turns it off!
haha
this ones funny
i love woolworths but the one near us has shut down
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spkn of countries...
where is every1 here from..?? ::)
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Egypt!!
;D
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coooooooolio...
Sudan.. neighbours.. alryte.. *HIGH FIVEE*!!
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ohhh i just went off ..doing nothing.. anyways at Omer.. no it was a phantom pen.. lol k lame.. gosh .. i shpuld study.. but dont we have two days to? hmmmmm..
-
Kuwait :)
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@ Loco.. And I am from Bangladesh!!! I-GEAR eh ..? lol .. no point telling i know! lol
anyhowss.. love ur pic man .. when didcha take it?
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ok here is one:
I arrive once in every second, once in every minute and once in every year. What am I?
haha....i dont want to party lol!! i already did one for my 1000..lol!!
its E ;D
-
all you guyz ig students...?
whn i got back.. surprizd u didn c it.. eisha did.. h3h3.. Thanks anyho..
yes yes total igearness m8..
-
coooooooolio...
Sudan.. neighbours.. alryte.. *HIGH FIVEE*!!
YES NEIGHBORS!! HIGH FIVE!!
EAMYZZ haha el riddle et 7alet khalas...badery :P
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all you guyz ig students...?
whn i got back.. surprizd u didn c it.. eisha did.. h3h3.. Thanks anyho..
yes yes total igearness m8..
MashaAllah ts nice.. lol.. u never showed it! how would i have seen it.. sighs anyways um off.. bye bye .. igear all the way .. lol
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EGYPT ;D
Q80 boy i lev ur lame jokes they r fun ;)
and shoushou hii ;D
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EGYPT ;D
Q80 boy i lev ur lame jokes they r fun ;)
and shoushou hii ;D
haha, glad u liked them :)
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EGYPT ;D
Q80 boy i lev ur lame jokes they r fun ;)
and shoushou hii ;D
haha, glad u liked them :)
i wonder where do u get dem 4rm :D
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i am wondering y no one is online today??!! Roxy always comes online after her exam....hmmm :-\
-
i am wondering y no one is online today??!! Roxy always comes online after her exam....hmmm :-\
i wonder if she is ok :-\
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i sent her a pm..lets hope she ok.
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me 2
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Council workers
There were two fellas working for the city council, one would dig a hole, the other would follow behind him and fill it in. They worked furiously all day without rest, one guy digging a hole, the other guy filling it in again.
An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing. So he asked the hole digger, "I appreciate the effort you're putting into your work, but what's the story? You dig a hole and your partner follows behind and fills it up again.
The hole digger wiped his brow and sighed, "Well, normally we're a three-man team, but the bloke who plants the trees is sick today."
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. u makin' ma day man ;D
-
im still here
and im studying at the same time
haha id like to call myself multi-talented
or not
-
nopes! am alive and shocked!
-
oh lool... yeah
so.. how you guyz been
I havnnt seen you on in ages OT13
-
yea, i've bin busy watching tennis today lol
but i did come for the party, tuned out to be the only who came at 8 lolz
-
lol
Some old jokes. :]
-
loool...koooll
yeah I wasnt here either ...
-
ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!
-
hehe.. ;D
-
lol
Some old jokes. :]
hey ura manaratie too ryte, wats ur name?
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not really, the guy was also against manarat in that other thread, and he talks like hes bin in the school for a long time, so i think i probably know him
-
Oh well gtg now, seeya tomorrow i hope!
oh wait, partys at 10 ryte?
-
yes at 10!!
gooood night :D
-
Roxy ill come after 10 min maybe and post a riddle...lol!!
-
here:
It regulates our daily movements, but it feels no interest in our lives. It directs us when to come and go, but does not care if we pay attention. What is it?
-
here:
It regulates our daily movements, but it feels no interest in our lives. It directs us when to come and go, but does not care if we pay attention. What is it?
air?
or breath?
-
no!! think think!! +rep for the winner... :P
-
time?
-
awwwwwwww ur close!!!!
-
days, hours minutes?
life?
anything else left to guess?
-
itsss really close to time!!
fakari fakari :P
-
i quit
what is it?
-
A CLocK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
now slap urself..it was easyyyyyyyyyyyy :P
-
A CLOAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
now slap urself..it was easyyyyyyyyyyyy :P
oh god
yeah
i was gonna say that
do u mean a clock?
or is it cloak?
-
sorry clock ;D
-
cool
anyways i gtg
good luck with your exams
study hard
bubye :)
-
hmmm Bye!! Good night!!
i wonder where is Roxy :-\
-
here's one i found on ma Lipton tea bag 2day mornin' ;D
how many months have got 28days?
-
all..
they atleast have 28 days..
many ppl will think abt february..
good one..
-
this is not a riddle, i am wondering: How do people born on 29 february celebrate their birthday? and how do they measure their age? like, do they get "one year older" every leap year or what?
-
Good Morning people........ukh my head hurts....and i had a weird dream...about 2 member in student forum..lol
-
Heeeeey,
good morning shush, hope it wasn't a nytemare :P
anyone else online?
and anyone able to answer my above question
-
wow and i got -2 rep....yesterday i did sumthin bad maybe thats the reason..... :(
-
hey omer...didnt speak to u since long time :-\ hmmmmmm i don't know abt ur question :(
-
yea Shush, long time (i.e. a whole day! :P )
and no worries about the rep, am repping u now, and then in two hours :D
-
hey peeps :)
Yes shosh u know how annoying it is :P i could of gotten 800 yesterday and 900 today lol
|
|
\./
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thx omer...+Rep for u 2...hey abdo, lol u deleted ur old posts..lol
-
YAY!
O.T.13. Reached +Rep 13!
thanks Shush,
so does anyone else have TWO FRIGGIN exams on monday?
-
i have no exam till 12th of june :P
haha yes abdo reaaaaaaaaaaally annoying i can remember how much i suffered especially for someone talkative like me....ur likr :-X
:P :P :P
-
ill be back after 20 mins isa....gtg for breakfast :(
-
ill be back after 20 mins isa....gtg for breakfast :(
haha okay enjoy, i only have 3 more exams, lit, 2 p1 phy/chem
-
i got FIVE
FIVE! :'(
Eco 2, ad bio 3 on Monday
and then wednesday, thursday, and friday, all multiple choices of Eco Phy and Chem
-
gd mornin guys......!
i got 2 papers left......BIO p3 (studied nothing yet) & chem p1
so freedom after BIO p3 hahaha
-
this thread is about to die!
no one is talking here anymore!
-
I'm back from the dead 8)
Missed me? :P
what's up evveerryyonnee?
-
nuthing, s'posed to study eco and bio today, havent started yet, how bout u Omer?
-
Im supposed to be studying bio -_- but im not in the mood to study. How did you do in bio p1? easy sa7?
-
@ Zero: yea it was great, but i made some silly mistakes
@Roxy: ya, both me and Zero and are called Omer ;D
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HEY PEOPLE!!! YAAAAAAAAAA PLZ DONT LET MY THREAD DIE...LOL!! maybe its becuz of bio...and heyyyy zero..we really missed u dude!!
Roxyyyyy wats up??!!!
-
Hala shoushou
-
Hala shoushou
HEY!! my sister left :'(
lol!! the stupid messenger isnt workin...non yahoo or hotmail...i wanna really speak to u...and ya roxy ur right there is a network problem in jeddah..u have to keep refreshin becuz its always sayin problem loading page >:(
anyway ill try again now....
-
Bel salameh inshalah =D
Hope it will be better today
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ohhh Sweetsh!! u have 2 posts to go..maybe we need a party..lol!!
-
The thread is dying!!
I'm off to have lunch now guys..Late lunch actually, I love you all <3
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The thread is dying!!
I'm off to have lunch now guys..Late lunch actually, I love you all <3
Bil 3afya sweetsh ;)
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yes its dying :'( :'( :'(
i am losing control :'( :'( :'( :'( lol!! anyway maybe Q80 will come later and post his lame jokes..lol!!
ukkhh me too..i think i am of to lunch..come bak later isa.. :)
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i cant find any jokes :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
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i cant find any jokes :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
find some!! >:(
hey i helped ur thread "General Talk" not to die..i posted a lot over there...now help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :'(
lol!! ill try to get some... :)
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it will get betta after monday
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it will get betta after monday
ya thats wat i think also..AFTER BIO!!lol!
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ok so what are we gonna do till then, i really cant be bothered to study eco nor bio lol
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Hearing Ad
A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money.
“How much do they run?“ he asked the clerk.
“That depends,“ said the salesman. “They run from 100 bucks to 10,000.“
“Let‘s see the cheaspest model,“ he said.
The clerk put the device around the man‘s neck.
“You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket,“ he instructed.
“How does it work?“ the customer asked. “For 100 RS it doesn‘t work,“ the salesman replied. “But when people see it on you, they‘ll talk louder!“ =P
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yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ABDO IS BACK TO SAVE THE THREAD!!!
"SUPERABOOD" LOL!!
-
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLL...!!!
Guyz were's Q80 ...?
-
no idea :P
Two men were sitting at the top floor of the Empire State Building.
One man says to the other.. "You know, if you jump out the window here, the force of the wind will blow you back in through the window on the 90th floor.."
The other man says " you're jokin aren't u?"
The 1st man says "No, here.. I'll prove it" so he stands on the window ledge and jumps out.. and comes back in thru the 90th floor window..
The 2nd man says.. "That was just a one off" So he does it again.. and comes thru on the 90th floor.. runs back up and says "See, im telling the truth"
The 2nd man says "Wow, im gonna do it then" he stands on the window ledge, jumps out and falls to his death.
The barman says to the first man.. "You know, you're an idiot when you're drunk superman"
-
ya where is he..missin his lame jokes :(
lol!!!
Sweetsh kol dah ur havin lunch?!!lol!! :P
-
Abdu.. Im sure language can be censored
Thanx mate ,,, okay Im modifying my posts cuz Im w8in for snitty .,...!!
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Abdu.. Im sure language can be censored
done :P
-
had to modify this one a bit, might not be as funny, u can try to solve which word i changed lol :P
Magic Apples !
A young fellow ran into an old man who was carring a bag.
"What's in the bag?" the youngster asked.
"magic apples", the old man replied.
"Prove it", said the young man.
"Well, besides apples, what is your favorite two fruits?" asked the old man.
"Watermelon and peaches", he answered.
The man handed him an apple and told him to try it out. The boy took a bite and said that it tasted like a watermelon. "Ok, turn it over", he said.
The boy did and took another bite and said that it tasted like a peach.
The youngster still wasn't convinced that they were magic.
The old fellow told him to name something else that he liked to eat.
"I like to eat chicken." he snapped.
The man handed him another apple and told him to try it.
He took a big bite, spit it out, wipped his mouth and esclaimed, "That tasted like sh*t".
The old man looked at him, smiled and said, "Turn it over."
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lool..!! I obviously havnt got a dirty mind ... :P :P :P :P :P :P
-
hahaha..this one is funny...hahahaha
isnt it the chicken A**??!! :-\
-
my twin is waiting for me......how emotional :P
hahaha
-
any riddles???
-
no shosh its a lil more complicated than that :P
-
no shosh its a lil more complicated than that :P
till wt extent :P :D
-
any riddles???
i just made this one up :P
5 cyclist cycled over a road full of spikes, 4 of them went over it and all their tyres popped, except the 5th one, why is that ?
-
no shosh its a lil more complicated than that :P
till wt extent :P :D
hmm, might be very offensive to some ppl, but very funny to others :P
-
no shosh its a lil more complicated than that :P
till wt extent :P :D
hmm, might be very offensive to some ppl, but very funny to others :P
no say its ok...
-
say it.......we will take it nice and easy :P :D
-
Id rather not lol
The Damned Egg
A Scotsman and an Englishman lived next door to each other.
The Scotsman owned a hen and each morning he would look in his garden and pick up one of his hen's eggs for breakfast.
One day he looked into his garden and saw that the hen had laid an egg in the Englishman's garden. He was about to go next door when he saw the Englishman pick up the egg.
The Scotsman ran up to the Englishman and told him that the egg belonged to him because he owned the hen.
The Englishman disagreed because the egg was laid on his property.
They argued for a while until finally the Scotsman said, "In my family we normally solve disputes by the following actions: I kick you in the testicles and time how long it takes for you to get back up. Then you kick me in the testicles and time how long it takes for me to get up. Whoever gets up quicker wins the egg."
The Englishman agreed to this and so the Scotsman put on the heaviest pair of boots he could find. He took a few steps back, then ran toward the Englishman and kicked him as hard as he could in the testicles.
The Englishman fell to the floor clutching his groin, howling in agony for 30 minutes.
Eventually the Englishman stood up and said, "Now it's my turn to kick you."
The Scotsman smiled and said, "Ye can keep the damn egg!!"
-
loool...!!
okay Im back after deleting 5 posts :P
-
come on abdo just say it >:(
-
im gonna get there soon :D lol
-
i sent a message to sanity if he thinks its ok ill change it :P
-
lol. okay .. reasonable :)
-
hmmmmmm ok...i dont want to know...i hate u abood >:(
ill get riddles for u people wait...
-
abdo.....u better change it :P :D
it might be "a little" offensive to some ppl :P :D
hahahahhahahahahahahahha
-
some ppl as in ......
looks like I need to delete sum more posts snitty u still have 8 .. Ive got 2 more :P
-
hmmmmmm ok...i dont want to know...i hate u abood >:(
ill get riddles for u people wait...
haha shosh 5alas dont worry, ill change it for u :)
-
@ roxy.......im getting there sooner than u think :D lol
-
ill change it back in 10 mins, cuz if sweetsh saw it, boy im bannned =P
and this post is gone too so she doesnt get confused :)
-
:D :D :D :D
thx abood
ok here is a joke: (roxy dont say if u know..lol)
It regulates our daily movements, but it feels no interest in our lives. It directs us when to come and go, but does not care if we pay attention. What is it?
-
i meant a riddle not a joke...
-
:D :D :D :D
thx abood
ok here is a joke: (roxy dont say if u know..lol)
It regulates our daily movements, but it feels no interest in our lives. It directs us when to come and go, but does not care if we pay attention. What is it?
u didnt do my riddle :P
a watch ?
-
lol!! i didnt see the riddle!! lol
ummm ya a watch khalas ur there abood bas wid another name ..lol
-
it is something related to time.........
clock?.........
-
lool... okay Snitt....we both got the same
-
i just made this one up
5 cyclist cycled over a road full of spikes, 4 of them went over it and all their tyres popped, except the 5th one, why is that ?
-
sanity wins people...ill save the
+rep for the party now...
nice try abood :-\
wait ill try to solve ur riddle lol
-
.......i heard a similar 1 to that before :D hahahaha
By the way.....roxy, lets get to the end in the other topic...........come with us PPL!!
-
haha its the same thing -.-
and for my riddle u can google it all u want u wont find it 8)
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i just made this one up
5 cyclist cycled over a road full of spikes, 4 of them went over it and all their tyres popped, except the 5th one, why is that ?
hahaha u made this up?!?!! r u sure its a riddle aslan??!
hmmmm becuz he didnt go from that road...or his tyres where different..lol
-
okay tell us ... :D
-
i wanted to say the different road thing......but he said the same road :D hahahaha
maybe he wasnt on a bike......he was riding with his friends (he is a cyclist with no cycle) :D hahahah
is it so?? :P
-
cuz all the spikes were already on the other 4 cyclists tyres :P
lame sa7 ? XD
-
i wanted to say the different road thing......but he said the same road :D hahahaha
maybe he wasnt on a bike......he was riding with his friends (he is a cyclist with no cycle) :D hahahah
is it so?? :P
hahaha this is much funnier than what i thought :P
-
hahahahahahahahah ...!!!
nopes... quite goood ...
okay one more post ...!
:P
-
On day a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde were on their way to heaven.
God told them the stairs to heaven were 1,000 steps and on every step he was going to tell them a joke. If they laughed they would not be able to get to heaven.
So the redhead made it to the 45th step and laughed.
The brunette made it to the 200th step and laughed.
But the blonde made it to the 999th step and laughed even before god told his joke.
God asked "Why did you laugh I haven't even told the joke yet"
The blonde said "I know I just remembered something funny!!!" :P
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mmm abdo yes its sooo lame..lol!!
now another riddle:
What is full of holes, but can still hold a lot of water? ;D
-
i wanted to say the different road thing......but he said the same road :D hahahaha
maybe he wasnt on a bike......he was riding with his friends (he is a cyclist with no cycle) :D hahahah
is it so?? :P
hahaha this is much funnier than what i thought :P
maybe u wanna make it the answer :D LOL :D :P
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mmm abdo yes its sooo lame..lol!!
now another riddle:
What is full of holes, but can still hold a lot of water? ;D
skin? :D
im studying biology :P hahaha
-
lool..
guyz I dont wannnaa studyyyy !!!!!
Okazy my computer is playing up.... so Im gonna restart it ... se ya guyz in a bit . :-*
-
my mouth ? :P
-
la2 wrong Sanity.
lol!! ok Roxy :-*
hahaha mouth!! wrong again :P
-
a shirt ? :P
-
a shirt ? :P
haha..kind of close :P
-
hehe ive had a 3 day rest, since my next exam is lit and is on tuesday, and p1s chem and phy which dont need alot of studying :D:D
-
a tissue box ??
-
The Fire Truck
A fireman is at the station house working outside on the fire truck when he notices a little girl next door. The little girl is in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the side.
She is wearing a fireman's hat and has the wagon tied to a dog. The fireman says "Hey little girl. What are you doing?" The little girl says "I'm pretending to be a fireman and this is my fire truck!"
The fireman walks over to take a closer look. "Little girl that sure is a nice fire truck!" the fireman says. "Thanks mister", says the little girl. The fireman looks a little closer and notices the little girl has tied the dog to the wagon by it's testicles.
"Little girl", says the fireman, "I don't want to tell you how to run your fire truck, but if you were to tie that rope around the dog's neck I think you could go faster."
The little girl says, "You're probably right mister, but then I wouldn't have a siren!" lmaoooo
-
a tissue box ??
nopssss :P :P :P
me toooo lol!! i had sooo many rest i dont take bio nor physics :P so 7 days off!!Wohoo :P :P :P
-
a sponge ??
Three men went to hell.
The devil said to them "You have come to hell, and you must now choose whether to spend eternity in room 1, 2 or 3"
He then opened the doors to the three rooms.
Room 1 was filled with men standing on their heads, on a hard wooden floor.
Room 2 was filled with men standing on the heads, on a cement floor.
Finally, room 3 had just a few men, standing in sh*t up to their knees and drinking coffee.
The men thought for a while, and decided to go with room 3, as it was less crowded and they could drink coffee.
They entered the door to room 3 and just as it was closing behind them, the devil said "OK men, coffee break's over. Back on your spikes."
-
Back...Studying Biology how is everyone?
-
WB sweetsh :D
i got biology but i will just study GENETICS.....im tired of this :(
-
u just missed 3-5 parties :P
-
Back...Studying Biology how is everyone?
hey sweetsh!!
ABDO IS DA WINNER PEOPLE!!! sweetsh +rep him becuz ur the only one who didnt..lol!!
-
lol.
hey sweetsh... !!
-
^_^
-
we all +repped each other! :D hahahhaa
-
REP PARTYYYYYYYY
-
u r the only one invited.......cuz we have this karma action :P :D hahahahahahahha
have fun +repping us :P :D....
+ rep for sweetsh
-
In the back woods of Scotland, Ian's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery.
To keep the nervous father-to-be busy, the doctor handed him a lantern and said: "Here, you hold this high so I can see what I'm doing." Soon, a wee baby boy was brought into the world.
"Whoa there Ian!" said the doctor. "Don't be in a rush to put the lantern down...I think there's yet another wee one to come yet."
Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered a bonnie lass.
"No, no, don't be in a great hurry to be putting down that lantern, lad...It seems there's yet another one besides!" cried the doctor.
Then Ian scratched his head in bewilderment, and told the doctor: "MAKE IT STOP !!"
-
Ok did it to everyone :D
-
Thanxxxxx !!!! ;D
-
Thank You sweetsh :D
Some not too smart gangsters decide to rob a bank. After several days of planning they agree on the best plan. The next day they get to work and are able to get into the bank relatively easy thanks to their planning. Once inside the main vault they discover one wall is full of safety deposit boxes and start to work on them immediately. They drill and pry open the first box only to find a small container of vanilla pudding inside.
The Head Gangster says, "Okay, well, at least we can eat it." So they eat the pudding. They drill and pry open up the second safety deposit box and there sits another pudding. They decide to devour it too.
Determined to find the goods, the process continues for the rest of the night until all the safety deposit boxes have been opened. They didn't find any money or jewelry in any of the boxes. Disappointed the head gangster said, "Well, at least they left something for us to eat."
The next day, while listening to the news they hear:"Yesterday the largest SPERM bank in the USA was robbed by an unknown group of people....."
i will stop posting dirty jokes XD
-
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! OH MY GOD!! SPERM!! EWWW!!HAHAHA
-
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwww....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
omg... tht is soooo sickk.... I dont evenn want to imagine it :P
*VOMITS*
-
hahahahahahaha Vomits!! Yes!!
-
hahahaha thats good to know :P
-
hahahaha thats good to know :P
hahahaha...ya ya..now post more like those ;D
-
hahahaha thats good to know :P
hahahaha...ya ya..now post more like those ;D
haha alright just wait till roxy stops vommiting so she starts again :P
-
hahahaha thats good to know :P
hahahaha...ya ya..now post more like those ;D
haha alright just wait till roxy stops vommiting so she starts again :P
HAHAHAHAHA!!! (evil laugh)
-
hahahaha thats good to know :P
hahahaha...ya ya..now post more like those ;D
haha alright just wait till roxy stops vommiting so she starts again :P
HAHAHAHAHA!!! (evil laugh)
no its MUAHAHAHAHA :D
-
not so funny but oh well :P
One day a man was waking along the beach when he tripped over a lamp. He turned around and kicked the lamp out of anger. A few seconds later, a genie popped out of the lamp, but the genie was angry that the man had kicked his lamp.
Reluctantly, the genie said, "Even though you kicked me, I still have to give you three wishes. However because of what you did, I will also give twice what you wish for to the person you hate the most: your boss."
So the man agreed and made his first wish. "I want lots of money", he said. Instantly 22 million dollars appear in the man's bank account and 44 million appeared in his boss' account.
For his second wish, the man wished for a couple of sports cars. Instantly a Lambergini, Ferrari and a Porsche appeared, but at the same time outside his boss' house appeared two of each car.
Finally the genie said, "This is your last wish, you should choose carefully", and so the man replied... "I've always wanted to donate a kidney..."
-
ahem.....
-
Hey guys... i'v got one.
How could a cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay two days, and ride out on Friday?
:P
-
ahahahahaha this is a good joke, and wb roxy, might wanna turn away :P
The Hypnotist Accident
The town fathers were looking for a way to increase attendance and participation at their regular meetings. One member suggested bringing in a hypnotist. The officials agreed, a famous hypnotist was hired, publicity distributed, and everyone was pleased.
A few weeks later the meeting hall was packed, and the town's people sat fascinated as the hypnotist withdrew a pocket watch. The hypnotist began chanting... "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch..."
The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until suddenly the hypnotist's fingers slipped and the watch fell to the floor...
"sh*t" said the hypnotist.
It took three weeks to clean up the town hall.
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Hey guys... i'v got one.
How could a cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay two days, and ride out on Friday?
:P
his horse is friday :P
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LOL...abulrahman thats right.. :P
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okay guyz...
this is lame but "oh well"
Sunsans mother had 3 daughters. The first one was called May, the second was called June, what was the third ones name ?
DONOT lok it up in google.. it just spoils the funn...:P
And dont +repp anyone pplz.. cuz the party is in 1 hr and 45 mins ... so u'll have the karma thing during the party
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SUSSAN!!
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it is much confusing in arabic :D hahahahaha
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lol. okay
but I bet you had to read it 2wice ... its suposed 2 be a verbal riddle... where you dont repeat the riddle :P
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sussan is the answer? i dont get it ? :P
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is "sunsan's" mother....has 3 gurls, she named 2 of them as months so u would say the third one as July or something....but the third one is sunsan which is already named :D hahaha
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HAHAHHAHA aboud!!! I can't stop laughing haha!
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why, wots funny ???
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hahaha omg im so blind hahahaha lool, u got me there XD
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wt did i miss?? :P :D
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH ...!!!
okay ... now I get it ...:P
and theres me saying its a "verbal riddle"
loooll... did u think it was gonna be April abdu ?
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH ...!!!
okay ... now I get it ...:P
and theres me saying its a "verbal riddle"
loooll... did u think it was gonna be April abdu ?
no July :P
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lol. yh I meant July... lost track on the months loool...:P
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wasnt it clear ????? hahahahhahahahaha
OMG :D :P
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lol. okay
but I bet you had to read it 2wice ... its suposed 2 be a verbal riddle... where you dont repeat the riddle :P
i havent read it twice....its crystal clear :D :P
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MARUHA!!! HAHAHAHA!!
el riddle di was posted before ya zakia...hahaha
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MARUHA!!! HAHAHAHA!!
el riddle di was posted before ya zakia...hahaha
nonononononono..........i havent seen it before, it is clear! :P hahaha
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MARUHA!!! HAHAHAHA!!
el riddle di was posted before ya zakia...hahaha
nonononononono..........i havent seen it before, it is clear! :P hahaha
NO IT WAS POSTED BEFORE.... ur not the thread owner >:(
we ba3den dakhal il tongue el 3alatool tala3 da..ba3den bo2ak yawga3ak.....
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hahahahahah
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One day, three boys were walking over a bridge when they heard a guy yelling for help. It was President Bush. He was drowning, and the three boys rescued him. He thanked them dearly and promised them whatever they wanted as a reward.
The first boy wanted $10,000, so Bush gave him the money. The second boy wanted a Ferrari, so Bush gave the boy a Ferrari.
The third boy wanted a wheelchair, Bush said, “Why do you want one of those, son, you're not handicapped.” The boy replied, “I will be when my dad finds out whose life I saved.”
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MARUHA!!! HAHAHAHA!!
el riddle di was posted before ya zakia...hahaha
nonononononono..........i havent seen it before, it is clear! :P hahaha
NO IT WAS POSTED BEFORE.... ur not the thread owner >:(
we ba3den dakhal il tongue el 3alatool tala3 da..ba3den bo2ak yawga3ak.....
when i said i didnt see it before i meant I didnt see not that it wasnt posted......:P
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An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop, and stay overnight. The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up to ask what happened to her. She answered the phone, crying, and said, "I can't get out of the room!" "You can't get out of your room?"; the captain asked. "Why not?" She replied, "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"
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Hahahahaha
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A blonde walks into the hairdresser with headphones on. She asks the woman working there for a haircut. The blonde sits down in the chair. The woman takes the blonde's headphones off and cuts her hair. At the end, the woman asks how she likes her hair but, to her surprise the blonde is dead! The woman picks up the headphones and listens.
She hears: “Breathe in...breathe out...breathe in...breathe out."
hahahhahahahahhahaha :D
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Blonde
A blonde and a both jump off a cliff at the same time. Which one will hit the bottom first?
The brunette, because the blonde has to ask for directions.
too much to take!!! :D hahahahhaa
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haha, another blonde joke :P
Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake were walking along the beach. Suddenly, Justin says, "Aww, Britney, look at the dead birdie."
Britney looks up at the sky and says, "Where?!"
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Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
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A: Pull the pin and throw it back.
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Q: How many blonde jokes are there?
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A: One. The rest are all true stories.
hahahhaha.......almost true :D hahaa
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hahahahahahahahaha
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She was so blonde that she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.
BLONDS!!!!! hahahhaa
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rofl !
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A blonde wanted to sell her car, but couldn't find any buyers. She called her friend for advice, and her friend asked her how many miles she had on her car.
"235,000 miles." Her friend told her that was the problem. But the blonde's friend told her that her brother is a mechanic and could put back the miles to whatever she wanted. So the blonde went to the mechanic and told him to put the miles at 40,000. Two days later the blond's friend asked her if she sold the car since her brother dropped the miles. The blonde told her, "Why would I sell the car? There are only 40,000 miles on it!"
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There was this bartender & he was working at the bar one night. In walked a group of blondes & they were chanting ''44 days! 44 days!'' One of the blondes was carrying a picture puzzle of Cookie Monster in a frame. The bartender leaned towards the blonde holding the puzzle and asked, ''Why are you chanting 44 days?'' She set down the puzzle on the counter and said, ''A lot of people think us blondes are dumb, so to show them, we bought this puzzle and put it together. It said 1-3 months but we completed it in 44 days!'''
hahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahhahahhahahhahahhahahhahahhaha.........*tears from laughing* hahahahahahahahhahahahahhaa
save the +repping for the party ppl :P :D ahahhaa
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Q:Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the party?
A: She heard the drinks where on the house.
:D:D:D:D......thats so "BLONDIE" ahhahahaa
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Q:Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the party?
A: She heard the drinks where on the house.
:D:D:D:D......thats so "BLONDIE" ahhahahaa
lmaooooooooooooooooooooo !!!!!!!!
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ROFL!!!
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A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him, and says, "Hey, wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The man says back to the blind man, "Look buddy, I'm blonde. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler and he is blonde. The bouncer is blonde. The man sitting over to your left is also blonde. Still wanna tell that blonde joke?"
The blind man is silent for a moment and then says, "Nah, I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times."
POOR MAN!!! :D :D :D
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A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him, and says, "Hey, wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The man says back to the blind man, "Look buddy, I'm blonde. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler and he is blonde. The bouncer is blonde. The man sitting over to your left is also blonde. Still wanna tell that blonde joke?"
The blind man is silent for a moment and then says, "Nah, I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times."
POOR MAN!!! :D :D :D
lmao :P
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ÖK not a blonde joke..but u guys have covered them all...hahah
Anyway,
So theres a 1st grade class..and there teacher says "Hello children, I have had enough of this baby talk, today we are going to talk in Grown-Up language. Now Rosy, tell me what you did this weekend"
Rosy: Well I went to the park..and umm..umm I fell..and i got..umm a boo-boo
Teacher: Nooo, i told you i want proper language..what did u do this weekend Charlie??
Charlie: umm, I went to this place..and ummm i saw this..umm chu chu train.
Teacher: No no no, i beleive its Railway Train!!! Are you children even listening to me (making the children rather flustered and scared) What about you Derick???
Derick: ummm (very scared, eyes wide open) Well, last night.. I went to sleep..
Teacher: yessss
Derick: and ummm my daddy...he read a book to me..
Teacher: okayyy, and what book was this..
Derick: Well..umm (pause) ummm Winnie the..Sh*t???
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u guys havent replied in so longggggggggg!!!! Was it really that bad?? :((((((
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No its because we are all partying =D
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HAHA YAH!! becuz we r in the partyyyy thread!!lol!!
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we r all partyin.......:D:D:D
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aaaaaah !!!
I found this on the 2nd page !!
i not meant to be there ... cumon guyz.. liven the place up .. :D :D :D
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hehe
got a joke ??
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lol.. I was waiting for ur lame ones :P
loool.. jokes... ur arnt lame .. I swear ..:P :P :P
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lol, ok then, heres one ...
Science Class
Sixth grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, "Which human body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?"
No one answered until little Molly stood up, angry, and said, "You should not be asking 6th graders a question like that! I'm going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, and you'll get fired!" She then sat back down.
Mrs. Parks ignored her, and asked the Question again, "Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated??
Little Molly's mouth fell open, and she said to those around her, "Boy, is she gonna get in big trouble!"
The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, "Anybody?"
Finally, Jimmy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, "The body part that increases to 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye.
"Mrs. Parks said, "Very good, Jimmy." Then turned to Molly and continued, "As for you, young lady, I have three things to say: First, you have a dirty mind. Second, you didn't read your homework. And third, one day you are going to be VERY VERY disappointed!
hehe, Molly has a very "clean" mind :P
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA ..... omgg... looool...
yes... the 6th graders mind is well "clean"
:P
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German Cowboy
So this German cowboy walked into a car showroom and says ’Owdy’
i know its lame, but roxy likes them :P
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Why men are happier
Men Are Just Happier People-
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President. You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut or a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. !
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier
die from jealousy girls !! were happy people :P
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HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
OMG.... IM CRACKIKKKKKIIIIG UPP!!!
LMBO !!!!!
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LMBO ?? im getting "clean" ideas :P jk
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ÖK not a blonde joke..but u guys have covered them all...hahah
Anyway,
So theres a 1st grade class..and there teacher says "Hello children, I have had enough of this baby talk, today we are going to talk in Grown-Up language. Now Rosy, tell me what you did this weekend"
Rosy: Well I went to the park..and umm..umm I fell..and i got..umm a boo-boo
Teacher: Nooo, i told you i want proper language..what did u do this weekend Charlie??
Charlie: umm, I went to this place..and ummm i saw this..umm chu chu train.
Teacher: No no no, i beleive its Railway Train!!! Are you children even listening to me (making the children rather flustered and scared) What about you Derick???
Derick: ummm (very scared, eyes wide open) Well, last night.. I went to sleep..
Teacher: yessss
Derick: and ummm my daddy...he read a book to me..
Teacher: okayyy, and what book was this..
Derick: Well..umm (pause) ummm Winnie the..Sh*t???
Hey sorry, if uve read this twice, but we were having a party, and no one read it. And YOU WOMAN HATER! YOU SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahaha no but im laughing
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loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
goinf4dakill, that made my day
lmao :P
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LOOOOOOLL...!!!
Grown up twk ... hehe ...:P
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Revenge and a cheap beer
A man walks into a bar one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer.
"Certainly, sir,! that'll be 1 cent."
"ONE CENT!" exclaimed the guy, the barman replied "Yes."
So the guy glances over at the menu, and he asks "Could I have a nice juicy T-bone steak, with chips, peas, and a fried egg?"
"Certainly sir,"replies the bartender, but all that comes to real money."
"How much money?" inquires the guy. "4 cents", he replies. "FOUR cents!" exclaims the guy.
"Where's the Guy who owns this place?" The barman replies, "Upstairs with my wife."
The guy says, "What's he doing with your wife?".
The bartender replies, "Same as I'm doing to his business."
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loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
goinf4dakill, that made my day
lmao :P
hahahah yeah i know Derick is DA BOSS
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What Company? (no offence americans :P)
Can you imagine working for the following company?
It has little over 500 employees with the following statistics:
o 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
o 7 have been arrested for fraud
o 19 have been accused of writing bad cheques
o 117 have bankrupted at least 2 businesses
o 3 have been arrested for assault
o 71 can’t get a credit card because of bad credit
o 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
o 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
o 21 are current defendants in lawsuits
In 1998, 84 were stopped for drunk driving
Can you guess what organization it is?
Give up?
It is the 535 members of the Congress of the United States of America!
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Hahahaha Q80BOY, I heard this joke once before, im not sure if in English or Arabic, anyway its so funny!
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hehe, glad u liked it,
k heres another lame one for roxy :P
Tommy's Homework
Tommy says to the teacher "Miss. would you ever punish me for something i didn't do?"
The teacher replies "No, Tommy of course not"
"Good cause i didn't do my homework!"
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Good excuse
A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up.
As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him. "There's no way they can catch a Mercedes, " he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100. . . .
Then the reality of the situation hit him. "What am I doing? " he thought and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car. "It's been a long day, this is the end of my shift and it's Friday the 13th. I don't feel like more paperwork, so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before, you can go. "
The guy thinks for a second and says, "Last week my wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her back! "
"Have a nice weekend, " said the officer.
hehe, lol, that one cracked me up :P
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looooolll...!!!
thanks for the joke Q80... but I oredy knew tht one ...loooolll..
:P
you see I prefer lame than dirty :P
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Three Old Men (hope i dont gross u out :P)
Three old men (70, 80, and 90) are sitting in front of a nursing home.
The 70 year-old said, "just once, I'd like to take a good, healthy piss". The other two nodded agreement.
The 80 year-old said, "You know, I wish just once I could take a solid sh*t".
The others nodded.
Then the 90 year-old spoke up. "Every morning at 7:00 sharp, I take a healthy piss.
And every morning at 7:30 like clockwork, I take a solid sh*t.
You know, just once I wish I could wake up before 8:00."
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Khaalaaaaas Q80 ....
Im gonna vomit soon :P
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haha lol, i knew a girl would say that :P
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loooll...!!
;D ;D ;D ;D
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Male or female...
Are you male or female?
To find the answer, look down!!!
Not here, Stupid!
(over rated ?? :P)
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haha... and surprisingly I knew that too ...:P
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YOUSEF ~~!!!!!!!!!!
Hahahahahahah!
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LOOOL
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lol. tell me about it sweetsh ::) ::)
and hey Abdu .. recovered from yesterday :P
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hehe, glad u liked that one :P
heres another ...
Early networks discovered ...
After having dug to a depth of 10 metres last year, Scottish scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.
Not to be outdone by the Scots, English scientists dug to a depth of 20 metres, and shortly after, headlines in the English newspapers read:
English archaeologists have found traces of 200 year old copper wire and have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network a hundred years earlier than the scots.'
One week later, 'The Kerryman,' Irish newsletter, reported the following:
'After digging as deep as 30 metres in peat bog near Tralee , Paddy O'Droll, a self taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely nothing.
Paddy has therefore concluded that 300 years ago Ireland had already gone wireless. '
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hehe, thats good, and hey peeps :D
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Were u gettiing ur jokes from Q80 ...?
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thats for sweetsh (and all man utd. fans) :P
Two Man Utd Fans
Two Man Utd fans are walking down the street at five pm on a Saturday evening.
1st ManU fan: I couldn't make the game at Old Trafford today, I was at a
funeral. What was the score?
2nd ManU fan: We drew 0-0.
1st ManU fan: Who missed our penalty?
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Okay guyz... I seriously need 2 go.... I'll be back in about an hour
Toooodlesss ... ;D
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laptop is acting very stupid now, ill go hav breakfast and restart laptop, Be right back
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Hahaha Q80 it's funny but it should be Two Barcelona Fans =D
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Were u gettiing ur jokes from Q80 ...?
my head !! lol jk
go to http://www.funny-haha.co.uk
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laptop is acting very stupid now, ill go hav breakfast and restart laptop, Be right back
tyt :)
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Hahaha Q80 it's funny but it should be Two Barcelona Fans =D
lol, i copied and pasted from a BRITISH site :P
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Okay guyz... I seriously need 2 go.... I'll be back in about an hour
Toooodlesss ... ;D
Bye...nd Goood luck!!
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Anyway...Bye Roxy and Take your time aboud...
Biology?
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Med school qualities
Students at a Med School were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human body. They were all gather around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet. Then the professor started telling them 'In medicine, it is necessary to have two important qualities as a doctor. The first is that you don't get disgusted.'
The professor uncovered the sheet, sunk his finger in the anus of the dead body, withdrew it and sucked it.
'Go ahead and do the same thing', he told his students.
The students first of all freaked out then hesitantly took turns sinking their fingers in and then sucking it.
When everyone had taken their turns the professor looked at them and told them, 'The second important quality is observation. I inserted my middle finger into the rectum yet sucked my index finger. Pay attention people!'
(sorry to gross u out again :P they're doing that in harvard med school, lol)
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oh my goddd ewwwww!!! hahaha..really........*vomits*
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German robbed twice in five minutes poor man :(
BERLIN (Reuters) - 05 March 2003
A 61-year-old German man has been robbed twice in five minutes in the western town of Herne, local police say.
The man first had his mobile phone stolen at a petrol station by youths who then fled.
When he pursued the thieves on foot, a passing car with three men claiming to be plain-clothes police stopped him, searched him and drove off with his wallet.
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how about this? I dont know if this joke has been told before. I didnt want to read through 150 pages :D
A ventriloquist has a dummy on his lap and is making the dummy tell blonde jokes. Finally, a blonde in the audience gets pissed and starts screaming at him, "Excuse me mister! I've had enough of your blonde jokes! Its male chauvinists like you that give us a bad name! We blondes around the world are self respecting, and people like you demoralize us!!"
The ventriloquist is flustered and starts to apologize, "I-I'm sorry miss, I-,"
"Dont interrupt me!" the blonde screamed. "And dont bring yourself into this! I'm speaking to the little man on your lap!"
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hehe
long live blondes !! ;D
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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all enter a swim meet. The gun goes off, and the brunette quickly captures first, with the redhead coming in second. An hour later, the blonde emerges from the pool and complains to the judges that while she was doing the breast stroke, the others were using their arms.
hahahhaa
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haha read it from like 3 different joke sites XD
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Q: Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
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A: Because red means stop.
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hahhaha lmao
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She is so blonde, she thinks that Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company.
hahahahhahaha.............."HELLO!! "
hahahha
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Two blondes drive through the middle of Kansas, surrounded entirely by wheat fields.
One blonde says, "Look over there!" They see another blonde in scuba gear acting like she's swimming through the wheat.
The blonde driving says, "It's girls like that who give us blondes a bad name."
The other blonde says, "Yeah! And if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and tell her off."
^^^^^^^^^^
thats the spirit we need blondie!!!! :D hahahaha
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Two blondes finds a mirror on the sidewalk.
The first blonde picks it up, looks into it, and says, "Hey, I know this person! I've seen her somewhere before."
The second blonde takes the mirror, looks into it, and says, "Duh! Of course you have -- that's me!"
^^^^^^^
friends for ever!! >>> By the way, those comments r mine! :P :P
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lool
How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his whopper.
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Q: Why can't you tell blondes knock-knock jokes?
A: Because they leave to go answer the door.
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dont u have any other jokes but these...............u r gonna get urself banned kid :P :P
hahaha
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Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear?
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A: A wind tunnel!
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BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, 'We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"
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SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
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hahahaha
FINAL EXAM
The blonde reported for her university final examination that consists of yes/no type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of inspiration, takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking the answer sheet: Yes, for Heads, and No, for Tails.
Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still sweating it out.
During the last few minutes she is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating. The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on.
"I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm rechecking my answers."
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BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, 'We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"
that joke is originally in arabic......the egyptians made it up!! :P :D
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lol..
haha...
loved it
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A blond was driving down the highway to Disneyland when she saw a sign that said "DISNEYLAND LEFT." After thinking for a minute, she said to himself, "oh well!" and turned around and drove home. On her way home, the same blond drove past another sign that said "CLEAN RESTROOMS EIGHT MILES." By the time she drove eight miles, he had cleaned 43 restrooms. lol
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Q: Why do blondes have more fun?
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A: They're easier to keep amused.
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hahahaha
FINAL EXAM
The blonde reported for her university final examination that consists of yes/no type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of inspiration, takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking the answer sheet: Yes, for Heads, and No, for Tails.
Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still sweating it out.
During the last few minutes she is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating. The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on.
"I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm rechecking my answers."
hey i myte do that for chemistry lol
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hahaha lool
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There once was a blonde who had always heard about ice fishing, so one day she tried it. She went to an icy area, cut a hole, and started fishing. All of a sudden, she hears a voice. “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!" She ignores it and moves to another area, cutting a hole, and beginning to fish again. Again she hears the booming voice. "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!!" She is starting to get freaked out now. "Lord? Is that you?" she asks. In reply she hears, "NO, THIS IS THE RINK MANAGER!"
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looooooooooooooool
i officially LOVE blondes now :P
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A man takes his son tiger hunting. They’re creeping through the weeds and the man says, “Son, this hunt marks your passage into manhood. Do you have any questions? And the boy says, “Yes, if the tiger kills you, how do I get home?”
A mother says to her small son who is being mean as usual, “How do you expect to ever get into Heaven?” To this her son replies" I figure I'll just run in and out the pearly gates until St. Peter says either stay in or out"!
haha
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looooooooooooooool
i officially LOVE blondes now :P
hahahaha!! i thought u like red heads :P :P :P
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hahahahah
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haha guys since ur all here ill just post my 1000th post, dont want to wait :P
A guest in a posh hotel comes down to breakfast and called over the head waiter and read from the menu “I’d like one under cooked egg so that it’s running, and one over cooked egg that it’s tough and hard to eat. I’d also like grilled bacon which is a bit on the cold side, burnt toast, butter straight from the freezer so that it’s impossible to spread, and a pot of very weak, lukewarm coffee.” that’s a complicated order sir, said the bewildered waiter. “It might be quite difficult.” The guest replied sarcastically, “It can’t be that difficult because that’s exactly what you brought me yesterday!”
A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street.
However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach.
After watching the boy's efforts for some time, the priest moves closer to the boy's position.
He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little fellow and, placing his hand kindly on the child's shoulder leans over and gives the doorbell a sold ring.
Crouching down to the child's level, the priest smiles benevolently and asks, "And now what, my little man?"
To which the boy replies, "Now we run!"
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "why is the bride dressed in white?" "Because white is the color of happiness," her mother explained. "And today is the happiest day in her life." The child thought about this for a moment. "So why is the groom wearing black?"
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Blonde's Cheer
I'm a blonde! I'm a blonde, yay!!! B-L-O...? I'm a blonde, yay!
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looooooooooooooool
i officially LOVE blondes now :P
hahahaha!! i thought u like red heads :P :P :P
i shifted i shifted :P
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do it in the party abdo......so we have 2 parties........u and adi!!!
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looooooooooooooool
i officially LOVE blondes now :P
hahahaha!! i thought u like red heads :P :P :P
i shifted i shifted :P
hahahaha..tell me when u shift to black/brown :P :P :P
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Q: What did the blonde say when she saw a herd of elephants with sunglasses on?
A: Nothing, she didn't recognize them.
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And shoushou tell me when you know =)
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A blonde biology student conducts an experiment on grasshoppers.
She pulls off one of its legs at a time and yells, "Hop." The grasshopper hops each time until all of its legs are gone.
The blonde concludes: when all the legs of a grasshopper are removed, it becomes deaf.
hahahahhahahhaha :D
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And shoushou tell me when you know =)
HAHAHA!! OK!! BYE SWEETY!!! :-*
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A blonde had some goldfish and she did not know how to feed them. So she called her brunette friend, and she showed her how. Once they were done feeding them, the blonde said, ''Now, what do I give them to drink?''
water?? :D :P :P :D
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Tired of constant blonde jokes, a blonde dyes her hair brown. She then goes for a drive in the country and sees a shepherd herding his sheep across the road.
"Hey, shepherd, if I guess how many sheep are here, can I keep one?"
The shepherd is puzzled but agrees. She blurts out "352!"
He is stunned but keeps his word and allows her to pick a sheep.
"I'll take this one," she says proudly. "It's the cutest!"
"Hey lady," says the shepherd, "if I guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"
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My thread is all about blondes now :'(
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A beautiful young blond woman boards a plane to LA with a ticket for the coach section. She looks at the seats in coach and then looks ahead to the first class seats. Seeing that the first class seats appear to be much larger and more comfortable, she moves forward to the last empty one. The flight attendant checks her ticket and tells the woman that her seat is in coach.
The blond replies, "I'm young, blond and beautiful, and I'm going to sit here all the way to LA."
Flustered, the flight attendant goes to the cockpit and informs the captain of the blond problem. The captain goes back and tells the woman that her assigned seat is in coach.
Again, the blond replies, "I'm young, blond and beautiful, and I'm going to sit here all the way to LA."
The captain doesn't want to cause a commotion, and so returns to the cockpit to discuss the blond with the co-pilot. The co-pilot says that he has a blond girlfriend, and that he can take care of the problem. He then goes back and briefly whispers something into the blonde's ear.
She immediately gets up, says, "Thank you so much," hugs the co-pilot, and rushes back to her seat in the coach section. The pilot and flight attendant, who were watching with rapt attention, together ask the co-pilot what he had said to the woman.
He replies, "I just told her that the first class section isn't going to LA."
------------------------------------------------------------------------
A man was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw a man eating grass by the roadside. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.
"Why are you eating grass?" he asked the man.
"I don't have any money for food," the poor man replied.
"Oh, please come to my house!"
"But sir, I have a wife and four children..."
"Bring them along!" the rich man said.
They all climbed into the limo. Once underway, the poor fellow said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us in."
The rich man replied, "No, you don't understand. The grass at my house is over three feet tall!"
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My thread is all about blondes now :'(
hahaha not quite, only 1/3 :P
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Schwarzenegger has a big one,
Michael J. Fox has a small one,
Madonna doesn't have one,
The POPE has one but doesn't use it,
Clinton uses his all the time,
Mickey Mouse has an unusual one,
George Burns' was hot,
Liberace NEVER used his on women,
Jerry Seinfeld is very very proud of his,
We never saw Lucy use Desi's
what is it?
A last name....... Were you thinking of something else?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA !!!!!!!!
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My thread is all about blondes now :'(
By the way...most of the jokes about blonds r originally egyptian jokes.........i've heard and read some blond jokes lately....its like im hearing the english translations D: hahahhaa
^^^^^^^^^
thats y they r funny :D :D
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What do you call a smart blonde?
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A Golden Retriever.
GO GO GO!!! :D
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Two blondes suddenly got into bird hunting and were eager to try it out for themselves. They had read that a birddog is a great and useful accessory in bird hunting, so they decided to go to the pet shop and buy one. They asked for a well-trained birddog, and got one. The two blondes immediately went to the woods to try it out. The dog didn't work. No matter how hard they tried, it just didn't follow their commands. They became really frustrated and one of the blondes said to her companion, “Okay, we'll give him one more try. We'll throw him in the air one more time and if he doesn't fly, we're taking him back to the store!”
poor dogy! :D
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My thread is all about blondes now :'(
By the way...most of the jokes about blonds r originally egyptian jokes.........i've heard and read some blond jokes lately....its like im hearing the english translations D: hahahhaa
^^^^^^^^^
thats y they r funny :D :D
hahaha..bas ma feesh fi maser blondes aslan 3ashan ya3malo jokes 3anhoom :P :P :P
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The new metro cop pulled a speeder who was zipping down Maple Avenue.
"Can I see your license and registration, bub?", the cop inquired.
"But officer," the fellow started, "I can explain..."
"Shut yer trap, bub!" snapped the officer. "You're going downtown
and sit a while till the sarge gets back."
"But, officer, I think you really should know..."
"And I said to shut yer trap! You're going to jail!"
A few hours later the cop looked in on his prisoner and said,
"Lucky for you that the sarge is at his daughter's wedding.
He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."
"Don't count on it," shot back the sap in the cell. "I'm the groom."
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A cop pulls a young guy over:
"Hello officer" said the smart aleck kid.
"Young man did you see that stop sign?" asked the cop.
Yup, but I didn't see you! :P :P :P
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My thread is all about blondes now :'(
By the way...most of the jokes about blonds r originally egyptian jokes.........i've heard and read some blond jokes lately....its like im hearing the english translations D: hahahhaa
^^^^^^^^^
thats y they r funny :D :D
hahaha..bas ma feesh fi maser blondes aslan 3ashan ya3malo jokes 3anhoom :P :P :P
3an el sa3ayda...we bel english blonds !!!!!!!!!!!! :P :P :D:D:D
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A french woman marries and english man and moves to england with him. The french woman doesnt know english so life is hard in England when her husband goes to work.
One day, the french woman goes to the butcher's, and wants some chicken leg, but she doesnt know how to ask for it. Eventually, she thinks of a plan. She flaps her arm, and pulls up her skirt and points at her leg. The butcher realizes what she wants and gives her some chicken leg.
The next day, the lady wants some chicken BREAST!!! She asks for it the same way as yesterday and flaps her arms and removes her shirt and bra and points at her breasts.
The next day, she wants some chicken sausage, but she doesnt know how to ask for it. Eventually she flaps her arms, brings her husband over and...
The husband knows english you sickos.
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loooooooooooooooooool
ive got a "clean" mind :P
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funny........... but i hav got a clean mind tooo!!!!
can u think of some clean jokes!!!
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hahahahahahahahahahahaha nice joke lmaooooo
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HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA
OOOMMMGGGG ...... Now that is SIIICCCKKK ...!!!
maybe its just my mind :P
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YAY! Feds completed his Grand Slam Set!
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can someone make me laugh ....
Q80... lame jokes please ...
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hehe, k roxy, here is a lame joke :P
Why I Fired My Secretary
Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning.
I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me
As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday."
I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids.... They will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, "Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday! " It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.
I worked until one o'clock , when Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me." I said, "Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go!"
We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. She chose instead a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day... We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We?"
I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind?" She said, "Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner."
After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back." "Ok," I nervously replied.
She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake . Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday."
And I just sat there...
On the couch...
Naked!
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loool very lame one!
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OOOOOOOOOOOHHHH SHHH*******TTT ...!!!!
okay... I said lame not dirty ...
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lol, the lame jokes finished :P and its not a dirty joke, the man was dirty :P
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ok, heres a lame joke for roxy ...
Rubber Toe!
Q. What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?
A. Roberto!
Q. What do you call a Brazillian with a rubber toe and no car?
A. Roberto Carlos!
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;D I used to call Reberto Carlos when i was small Reberto Martacolas!! Liked this joke~!
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LOOOOOOOLLL..!!!
yeah Q80 !!! I like it !!!!! :P
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another roxy joke :P
Sharing
A little old couple walked slowly into McDonalds one cold winter. They looked out of place amid the young families and young couples eating there that night.
Some of the customers looked admiringly at them. You could tell what the admirers were thinking. "Look, there is a couple who has been through a lot together, probably for 60 years or more!" The little old man walked right up to the cash register, placed his order with no hesitation and then paid for their meal. The couple took a table near the back wall and started taking food off of the tray. There was one hamburger, one order of French fries and one drink. The little old man unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half. He placed one half in front of his wife. Then he carefully counted out the French fries, divided them in two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife. He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them. As the man began to eat his few bites of hamburger the crowd began to get restless. Again you could tell what they were thinking. "That poor old couple. All they can afford is one meal for the two of them," As the man began to eat his French fries one young man stood and came over to the old couples' table. He politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple to eat. The old man replied that they were just fine. They were used to sharing everything. Then the crowd noticed that the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite. She just sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink. Again the young man came over and begged them to let him buy them something to eat. This time the lady explained that no, they were used to sharing everything together. As the little old man finished eating and was wiping his face neatly with a napkin the young man could stand it no longer.
Again he came over to their table and offered to buy some food. After being politely refused again he finally asked a question of the little old lady. "Ma'am, why aren't you eating. You said that you share everything. What is it that you are waiting for?" She answered... "The teeth".
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AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That was FUNNNNNNNYYYY...!!!
thanx Q80... I think Ive done enough laughing for today :P
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I liked it bro <3
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hehe, thanks sis ...
so roxy, u want anymore ?
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hehe, thanks sis ...
so roxy, u want anymore ?
HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH!
I actually thought that was funny. :D hahah incase u didnt notice -.-
At first i was like..urm what? and then i got ittttt ahahahahahhah and then cracked up
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loool... same here mate ..:P
;D ;D ;D
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im not getting the joke here :-[
lol, but i'l laugh anyway :P
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lool I dont think it was a joke Q80.... :P
but laughings good 4 ur health ... so yeah ...:P
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I BET YOU CANNOT READ THE WHOLE THING PPL! :P
part 1 of 4
The longest joke in the world:
Lost in the Desert
(Author unknown)
So, there’s a man crawling through the desert.
He’d decided to try his SUV in a little bit of cross-country travel, had great fun zooming over the badlands and through the sand, got lost, hit a big rock, and then he couldn’t get it started again. There were no cell phone towers anywhere near, so his cell phone was useless. He had no family, his parents had died a few years before in an auto accident, and his few friends had no idea he was out here.
He stayed with the car for a day or so, but his one bottle of water ran out and he was getting thirsty. He thought maybe he knew the direction back, now that he’d paid attention to the sun and thought he’d figured out which way was north, so he decided to start walking. He figured he only had to go about 30 miles or so and he’d be back to the small town he’d gotten gas in last.
He thinks about walking at night to avoid the heat and sun, but based upon how dark it actually was the night before, and given that he has no flashlight, he’s afraid that he’ll break a leg or step on a rattlesnake. So, he puts on some sun block, puts the rest in his pocket for reapplication later, brings an umbrella he’d had in the back of the SUV with him to give him a little shade, pours the windshield wiper fluid into his water bottle in case he gets that desperate, brings his pocket knife in case he finds a cactus that looks like it might have water in it, and heads out in the direction he thinks is right.
He walks for the entire day. By the end of the day he’s really thirsty. He’s been sweating all day, and his lips are starting to crack. He’s reapplied the sunblock twice, and tried to stay under the umbrella, but he still feels sunburned. The windshield wiper fluid sloshing in the bottle in his pocket
is really getting tempting now. He knows that it’s mainly water and some ethanol and coloring, but he also knows that they add some kind of poison to
it to keep people from drinking it. He wonders what the poison is, and whether the poison would be worse than dying of thirst.
He pushes on, trying to get to that small town before dark.
By the end of the day he starts getting worried. He figures he’s been walking at least 3 miles an hour, according to his watch for over 10 hours. That means that if his estimate was right that he should be close to the town. But he doesn’t recognize any of this. He had to cross a dry creek bed a mile or two back, and he doesn’t remember coming through it in the SUV. He figures that maybe he got his direction off just a little and that the dry creek bed was just off to one side of his path. He tells himself that he’s close, and that after dark he’ll start seeing the town lights over one of these hills, and that’ll be all he needs.
As it gets dim enough that he starts stumbling over small rocks and things, he finds a spot and sits down to wait for full dark and the town lights.
Full dark comes before he knows it. He must have dozed off. He stands back up and turns all the way around. He sees nothing but stars.
He wakes up the next morning feeling absolutely lousy. His eyes are gummy and his mouth and nose feel like they’re full of sand. He so thirsty that he can’t even swallow. He barely got any sleep because it was so cold. He’d forgotten how cold it got at night in the desert and hadn’t noticed it the night before because he’d been in his car.
He knows the Rule of Threes - three minutes without air, three days without water, three weeks without food - then you die. Some people can make it a little longer, in the best situations. But the desert heat and having to walk and sweat isn’t the best situation to be without water. He figures, unless he finds water, this is his last day.
He rinses his mouth out with a little of the windshield wiper fluid. He waits a while after spitting that little bit out, to see if his mouth goes numb, or he feels dizzy or something. Has his mouth gone numb? Is it just in his mind? He’s not sure. He’ll go a little farther, and if he still doesn’t find water, he’ll try drinking some of the fluid.
Then he has to face his next, harder question - which way does he go from here? Does he keep walking the same way he was yesterday (assuming that he still knows which way that is), or does he try a new direction? He has no idea what to do.
Looking at the hills and dunes around him, he thinks he knows the direction he was heading before. Just going by a feeling, he points himself somewhat to the left of that, and starts walking.
As he walks, the day starts heating up. The desert, too cold just a couple of hours before, soon becomes an oven again. He sweats a little at first, and then stops. He starts getting worried at that - when you stop sweating he knows that means you’re in trouble - usually right before heat stroke.
He decides that it’s time to try the windshield wiper fluid. He can’t wait any longer - if he passes out, he’s dead. He stops in the shade of a large rock, takes the bottle out, opens it, and takes a mouthful. He slowly swallows it, making it last as long as he can. It feels so good in his dry and cracked throat that he doesn’t even care about the nasty taste. He takes another mouthful, and makes it last too. Slowly, he drinks half the bottle.
He figures that since he’s drinking it, he might as well drink enough to make some difference and keep himself from passing out.
He’s quit worrying about the denaturing of the wiper fluid. If it kills him, it kills him - if he didn’t drink it, he’d die anyway. Besides, he’s pretty sure that whatever substance they denature the fluid with is just designed to make you sick - their way of keeping winos from buying cheap wiper fluid for the ethanol content. He can handle throwing up, if it comes to that.
He walks. He walks in the hot, dry, windless desert. Sand, rocks, hills, dunes, the occasional scrawny cactus or dried bush. No sign of water. Sometimes he’ll see a little movement to one side or the other, but whatever moved is usually gone before he can focus his eyes on it. Probably birds, lizards, or mice. Maybe snakes, though they usually move more at night. He’s careful to stay away from the movements.
After a while, he begins to stagger. He’s not sure if it’s fatigue, heat stroke finally catching him, or maybe he was wrong and the denaturing of the wiper fluid was worse than he thought. He tries to steady himself, and keep going.
After more walking, he comes to a large stretch of sand. This is good! He knows he passed over a stretch of sand in the SUV - he remembers doing donuts in it. Or at least he thinks he remembers it - he’s getting woozy enough and tired enough that he’s not sure what he remembers any more or if he’s hallucinating. But he thinks he remembers it. So he heads off into it, trying to get to the other side, hoping that it gets him closer to the town.
He was heading for a town, wasn’t he? He thinks he was. He isn’t sure any more. He’s not even sure how long he’s been walking any more. Is it still morning? Or has it moved into afternoon and the sun is going down again? It must be afternoon - it seems like it’s been too long since he started out.
He walks through the sand.
After a while, he comes to a big dune in the sand. This is bad. He doesn’t remember any dunes when driving over the sand in his SUV. Or at least he doesn’t think he remembers any. This is bad.
But, he has no other direction to go. Too late to turn back now. He figures that he’ll get to the top of the dune and see if he can see anything from there that helps him find the town. He keeps going up the dune.
Halfway up, he slips in the bad footing of the sand for the second or third time, and falls to his knees. He doesn’t feel like getting back up - he’ll just fall down again. So, he keeps going up the dune on his hand and knees.
While crawling, if his throat weren’t so dry, he’d laugh. He’s finally gotten to the hackneyed image of a man lost in the desert - crawling through the sand on his hands and knees. If would be the perfect image, he imagines, if only his clothes were more ragged. The people crawling through the desert in the cartoons always had ragged clothes. But his have lasted without any rips so far. Somebody will probably find his dessicated corpse half buried in the sand years from now, and his clothes will still be in fine shape -shake the sand out, and a good wash, and they’d be wearable again. He wishes his throat were wet enough to laugh. He coughs a little instead, and it hurts.
He finally makes it to the top of the sand dune. Now that he’s at the top, he struggles a little, but manages to stand up and look around. All he sees is sand. Sand, and more sand. Behind him, about a mile away, he thinks he sees the rocky ground he left to head into this sand. Ahead of him, more dunes, more sand. This isn’t where he drove his SUV. This is Hell. Or close enough.
Again, he doesn’t know what to do. He decides to drink the rest of the wiper fluid while figuring it out. He takes out the bottle, and is removing the cap, when he glances to the side and sees something. Something in the sand. At the bottom of the dune, off to the side, he sees something strange. It’s a flat area, in the sand. He stops taking the cap of the bottle off, and tries to look closer. The area seems to be circular. And it’s dark - darker than the sand. And, there seems to be something in the middle of it, but he can’t tell what it is. He looks as hard as he can, and still can tell from here. He’s going to have to go down there and look.
He puts the bottle back in his pocket, and starts to stumble down the dune. After a few steps, he realizes that he’s in trouble - he’s not going to be able to keep his balance. After a couple of more sliding, tottering steps, he falls and starts to roll down the dune. The sand it so hot when his body hits it that for a minute he thinks he’s caught fire on the way down - like a movie car wreck flashing into flames as it goes over the cliff, before it ever even hits the ground. He closes his eyes and mouth, covers his face with his hands, and waits to stop rolling.
He stops, at the bottom of the dune. After a minute or two, he finds enough energy to try to sit up and get the sand out of his face and clothes. When he clears his eyes enough, he looks around to make sure that the dark spot in the sand it still there and he hadn’t just imagined it.
So, seeing the large, flat, dark spot on the sand is still there, he begins to crawl towards it. He’d get up and walk towards it, but he doesn’t seem to have the energy to get up and walk right now. He must be in the final stages of dehydration he figures, as he crawls. If this place in the sand doesn’t have water, he’ll likely never make it anywhere else. This is his last chance.
He gets closer and closer, but still can’t see what’s in the middle of the dark area. His eyes won’t quite focus any more for some reason. And lifting his head up to look takes so much effort that he gives up trying. He just keeps crawling.
Finally, he reaches the area he’d seen from the dune. It takes him a minute of crawling on it before he realizes that he’s no longer on sand - he’s now crawling on some kind of dark stone. Stone with some kind of marking on it -a pattern cut into the stone. He’s too tired to stand up and try to see what the pattern is - so he just keeps crawling. He crawls towards the center, where his blurry eyes still see something in the middle of the dark stone area.
His mind, detached in a strange way, notes that either his hands and knees are so burnt by the sand that they no longer feel pain, or that this dark stone, in the middle of a burning desert with a pounding, punishing sun overhead, doesn’t seem to be hot. It almost feels cool. He considers lying down on the nice cool surface.
Cool, dark stone. Not a good sign. He must be hallucinating this. He’s probably in the middle of a patch of sand, already lying face down and dying, and just imagining this whole thing. A desert mirage. Soon the beautiful women carrying pitchers of water will come up and start giving him a drink. Then he’ll know he’s gone.
He decides against laying down on the cool stone. If he’s going to die here in the middle of this hallucination, he at least wants to see what’s in the center before he goes. He keeps crawling.
It’s the third time that he hears the voice before he realizes what he’s hearing. He would swear that someone just said, “Greetings, traveler. You do not look well. Do you hear me?”
He stops crawling. He tries to look up from where he is on his hands and knees, but it’s too much effort to lift his head. So he tries something different - he leans back and tries to sit up on the stone. After a few seconds, he catches his balance, avoids falling on his face, sits up, and tries to focus his eyes. Blurry. He rubs his eyes with the back of his hands and tries again. Better this time.
Yep. He can see. He’s sitting in the middle of a large, flat, dark expanse of stone. Directly next to him, about three feet away, is a white post or pole about two inches in diameter and sticking up about four or five feet out of the stone, at an angle.
And wrapped around this white rod, tail with rattle on it hovering and seeming to be ready to start rattling, is what must be a fifteen foot long desert diamondback rattlesnake, looking directly at him.
He stares at the snake in shock. He doesn’t have the energy to get up and run away. He doesn’t even have the energy to crawl away. This is it, his final resting place. No matter what happens, he’s not going to be able to move from this spot.
Well, at least dying of a bite from this monster should be quicker than dying of thirst. He’ll face his end like a man. He struggles to sit up a little straighter. The snake keeps watching him. He lifts one hand and waves it in the snake’s direction, feebly. The snake watches the hand for a moment, then goes back to watching the man, looking into his eyes.
Hmmm. Maybe the snake had no interest in biting him? It hadn’t rattled yet -that was a good sign. Maybe he wasn’t going to die of snake bite after all.
He then remembers that he’d looked up when he’d reached the center here because he thought he’d heard a voice. He was still very woozy - he was likely to pass out soon, the sun still beat down on him even though he was now on cool stone. He still didn’t have anything to drink. But maybe he had actually heard a voice. This stone didn’t look natural. Nor did that white post sticking up out of the stone. Someone had to have built this. Maybe
they were still nearby. Maybe that was who talked to him. Maybe this snake was even their pet, and that’s why it wasn’t biting.
He tries to clear his throat to say, “Hello,” but his throat is too dry. All that comes out is a coughing or wheezing sound. There is no way he’s going to be able to talk without something to drink. He feels his pocket, and the bottle with the wiper fluid is still there. He shakily pulls the bottle out, almost losing his balance and falling on his back in the process. This isn’t good. He doesn’t have much time left, by his reckoning, before he passes out.
He gets the lid off of the bottle, manages to get the bottle to his lips, and pours some of the fluid into his mouth. He sloshes it around, and then swallows it. He coughs a little. His throat feels better. Maybe he can talk now.
He tries again. Ignoring the snake, he turns to look around him, hoping to spot the owner of this place, and croaks out, “Hello? Is there anyone here?”
He hears, from his side, “Greetings. What is it that you want?”
He turns his head, back towards the snake. That’s where the sound had seemed to come from. The only thing he can think of is that there must be a speaker, hidden under the snake, or maybe built into that post. He decides to try asking for help.
“Please,” he croaks again, suddenly feeling dizzy, “I’d love to not be thirsty any more. I’ve been a long time without water. Can you help me?”
Looking in the direction of the snake, hoping to see where the voice was coming from this time, he is shocked to see the snake rear back, open its mouth, and speak. He hears it say, as the dizziness overtakes him and he falls forward, face first on the stone, “Very well. Coming up.”
A piercing pain shoots through his shoulder. Suddenly he is awake. He sits up and grabs his shoulder, wincing at the throbbing pain. He’s momentarily disoriented as he looks around, and then he remembers - the crawl across the sand, the dark area of stone, the snake. He sees the snake, still wrapped around the tilted white post, still looking at him.
He reaches up and feels his shoulder, where it hurts. It feels slightly wet. He pulls his fingers away and looks at them - blood. He feels his shoulder again - his shirt has what feels like two holes in it - two puncture holes -they match up with the two aching spots of pain on his shoulder. He had been bitten. By the snake.
“It’ll feel better in a minute.” He looks up - it’s the snake talking. He hadn’t dreamed it. Suddenly he notices - he’s not dizzy any more. And more importantly, he’s not thirsty any more - at all!
“Have I died? Is this the afterlife? Why are you biting me in the afterlife?”
“Sorry about that, but I had to bite you,” says the snake. “That’s the way I work. It all comes through the bite. Think of it as natural medicine.”
“You bit me to help me? Why aren’t I thirsty any more? Did you give me a drink before you bit me? How did I drink enough while unconscious to not be thirsty any more? I haven’t had a drink for over two days. Well, except for the windshield wiper fluid… hold it, how in the world does a snake talk? Are you real? Are you some sort of Disney animation?”
“No,” says the snake, “I’m real. As real as you or anyone is, anyway. I didn’t give you a drink. I bit you. That’s how it works - it’s what I do. I bite. I don’t have hands to give you a drink, even if I had water just sitting around here.”
The man sat stunned for a minute. Here he was, sitting in the middle of the desert on some strange stone that should be hot but wasn’t, talking to a snake that could talk back and had just bitten him. And he felt better. Not great - he was still starving and exhausted, but much better - he was no longer thirsty. He had started to sweat again, but only slightly. He felt hot, in this sun, but it was starting to get lower in the sky, and the cool stone beneath him was a relief he could notice now that he was no longer dying of thirst.
“I might suggest that we take care of that methanol you now have in your system with the next request,” continued the snake. “I can guess why you drank it, but I’m not sure how much you drank, or how much methanol was left in the wiper fluid. That stuff is nasty. It’ll make you go blind in a day or two, if you drank enough of it.”
“Ummm, n-next request?” said the man. He put his hand back on his hurting shoulder and backed away from the snake a little.
continued in next post
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LOOOOOL....!!!
Loking at it made me laugh !!! hhahahahah ... nopes.... I aint even tryng to read that mate ..:P
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lol, thats too long,
can u please give us a summary :P
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Continuation (part 2 of 4)
“That’s the way it works. If you like, that is,” explained the snake. “You get three requests. Call them wishes, if you wish.” The snake grinned at his own joke, and the man drew back a little further from the show of fangs.
“But there are rules,” the snake continued. “The first request is free. The second requires an agreement of secrecy. The third requires the binding of responsibility.” The snake looks at the man seriously.
“By the way,” the snake says suddenly, “my name is Nathan. Old Nathan, Samuel used to call me. He gave me the name. Before that, most of the Bound used to just call me ‘Snake’. But that got old, and Samuel wouldn’t stand for it. He said that anything that could talk needed a name. He was big into names. You can call me Nate, if you wish.” Again, the snake grinned. “Sorry if I don’t offer to shake, but I think you can understand - my shake sounds
somewhat threatening.” The snake give his rattle a little shake.
“Umm, my name is Jack,” said the man, trying to absorb all of this. “Jack Samson.
“Can I ask you a question?” Jack says suddenly. “What happened to the poison…umm, in your bite. Why aren’t I dying now? How did you do that? What do you mean by that’s how you work?”
“That’s more than one question,” grins Nate. “But I’ll still try to answer all of them. First, yes, you can ask me a question.” The snake’s grin gets wider. “Second, the poison is in you. It changed you. You now no longer need to drink. That’s what you asked for. Or, well, technically, you asked to not be thirsty any more - but ‘any more’ is such a vague term. I decided to make it permanent - now, as long as you live, you shouldn’t need to drink much at all. Your body will conserve water very efficiently. You should be able to get enough just from the food you eat - much like a creature of the desert. You’ve been changed.
“For the third question,” Nate continues, “you are still dying. Besides the effects of that methanol in your system, you’re a man - and men are mortal. In your current state, I give you no more than about another 50 years. Assuming you get out of this desert, alive, that is.” Nate seemed vastly amused at his own humor, and continued his wide grin.
“As for the fourth question,” Nate said, looking more serious as far as Jack could tell, as Jack was just now working on his ability to read talking-snake emotions from snake facial features, “first you have to agree to make a second request and become bound by the secrecy, or I can’t tell you.”
“Wait,” joked Jack, “isn’t this where you say you could tell me, but you’d have to kill me?”
“I thought that was implied.” Nate continued to look serious.
“Ummm…yeah.” Jack leaned back a little as he remembered again that he was talking to a fifteen foot poisonous reptile with a reputation for having a nasty temper. “So, what is this ‘Bound by Secrecy’ stuff, and can you really stop the effects of the methanol?” Jack thought for a second. “And, what do you mean methanol, anyway? I thought these days they use ethanol in wiper fluid, and just denature it?”
“They may, I don’t really know,” said Nate. “I haven’t gotten out in a while. Maybe they do. All I know is that I smell methanol on your breath and on that bottle in your pocket. And the blue color of the liquid when you pulled it out to drink some let me guess that it was wiper fluid. I assume that they still color wiper fluid blue?”
“Yeah, they do,” said Jack.
“I figured,” replied Nate. “As for being bound by secrecy - with the fulfillment of your next request, you will be bound to say nothing about me, this place, or any of the information I will tell you after that, when you decide to go back out to your kind. You won’t be allowed to talk about me, write about me, use sign language, charades, or even act in a way that will lead someone to guess correctly about me. You’ll be bound to secrecy. Of course, I’ll also ask you to promise not to give me away, and as I’m guessing that you’re a man of your word, you’ll never test the binding anyway, so you won’t notice.” Nate said the last part with utter confidence.
Jack, who had always prided himself on being a man of his word, felt a little nervous at this. “Ummm, hey, Nate, who are you? How did you know that? Are you, umm, omniscient, or something?”
Well, Jack,” said Nate sadly, “I can’t tell you that, unless you make the second request.” Nate looked away for a minute, then looked back.
“Umm, well, ok,” said Jack, “what is this about a second request? What can I ask for? Are you allowed to tell me that?”
“Sure!” said Nate, brightening. “You’re allowed to ask for changes. Changes to yourself. They’re like wishes, but they can only affect you. Oh, and before you ask, I can’t give you immortality. Or omniscience. Or omnipresence, for that matter. Though I might be able to make you gaseous and yet remain alive, and then you could spread through the atmosphere and sort of be omnipresent. But what good would that be - you still wouldn’t be omniscient and thus still could only focus on one thing at a time. Not very useful, at least in my opinion.” Nate stopped when he realized that Jack was staring at him.
“Well, anyway,” continued Nate, “I’d probably suggest giving you permanent good health. It would negate the methanol now in your system, you’d be immune to most poisons and diseases, and you’d tend to live a very long time, barring accident, of course. And you’ll even have a tendency to recover from accidents well. It always seemed like a good choice for a request to me.”
“Cure the methanol poisoning, huh?” said Jack. “And keep me healthy for a long time? Hmmm. It doesn’t sound bad at that. And it has to be a request about a change to me? I can’t ask to be rich, right? Because that’s not really a change to me?”
“Right,” nodded Nate.
“Could I ask to be a genius and permanently healthy?” Jack asked, hopefully.
“That takes two requests, Jack.”
“Yeah, I figured so,” said Jack. “But I could ask to be a genius? I could become the smartest scientist in the world? Or the best athlete?”
“Well, I could make you very smart,” admitted Nate, “but that wouldn’t necessarily make you the best scientist in the world. Or, I could make you very athletic, but it wouldn’t necessarily make you the best athlete either. You’ve heard the saying that 99% of genius is hard work? Well, there’s some truth to that. I can give you the talent, but I can’t make you work hard. It all depends on what you decide to do with it.”
“Hmmm,” said Jack. “Ok, I think I understand. And I get a third request, after this one?”
“Maybe,” said Nate, “it depends on what you decide then. There are more rules for the third request that I can only tell you about after the second request. You know how it goes.” Nate looked like he’d shrug, if he had shoulders.
“Ok, well, since I’d rather not be blind in a day or two, and permanent health doesn’t sound bad, then consider that my second request. Officially. Do I need to sign in blood or something?”
“No,” said Nate. “Just hold out your hand. Or heel.” Nate grinned. “Or whatever part you want me to bite. I have to bite you again. Like I said, that’s how it works - the poison, you know,” Nate said apologetically.
Jack winced a little and felt his shoulder, where the last bite was. Hey, it didn’t hurt any more. Just like Nate had said. That made Jack feel better about the biting business. But still, standing still while a fifteen foot snake sunk it’s fangs into you. Jack stood up. Ignoring how good it felt to be able to stand again, and the hunger starting to gnaw at his stomach, Jack tried to decide where he wanted to get bitten. Despite knowing that it wouldn’t hurt for long, Jack knew that this wasn’t going to be easy.
“Hey, Jack,” Nate suddenly said, looking past Jack towards the dunes behind him, “is that someone else coming up over there?”
Jack spun around and looked. Who else could be out here in the middle of nowhere? And did they bring food?
Wait a minute, there was nobody over there. What was Nate…
Jack let out a bellow as he felt two fangs sink into his rear end, through his jeans…
Jack sat down carefully, favoring his more tender buttock. “I would have decided, eventually, Nate. I was just thinking about it. You didn’t have to
hoodwink me like that.”
“I’ve been doing this a long time, Jack,” said Nate, confidently. “You humans have a hard time sitting still and letting a snake bite you - especially one my size. And besides, admit it - it’s only been a couple of minutes and it already doesn’t hurt any more, does it? That’s because of the health benefit with this one. I told you that you’d heal quickly now.”
“Yeah, well, still,” said Jack, “it’s the principle of the thing. And nobody likes being bitten in the butt! Couldn’t you have gotten my calf or something instead?”
“More meat in the typical human butt,” replied Nate. “And less chance you accidentally kick me or move at the last second.”
“Yeah, right. So, tell me all of these wonderful secrets that I now qualify to hear,” answered Jack.
“Ok,” said Nate. “Do you want to ask questions first, or do you want me to just start talking?”
“Just talk,” said Jack. “I’ll sit here and try to not think about food.”
“We could go try to rustle up some food for you first, if you like,” answered Nate.
“Hey! You didn’t tell me you had food around here, Nate!” Jack jumped up. “What do we have? Am I in walking distance to town? Or can you magically whip up food along with your other powers?” Jack was almost shouting with excitement. His stomach had been growling for hours.
“I was thinking more like I could flush something out of its hole and bite it for you, and you could skin it and eat it. Assuming you have a knife, that is,” replied Nate, with the grin that Jack was starting to get used to.
“Ugh,” said Jack, sitting back down. “I think I’ll pass. I can last a little longer before I get desperate enough to eat desert rat, or whatever else it is you find out here. And there’s nothing to burn - I’d have to eat it raw. No thanks. Just talk.”
“Ok,” replied Nate, still grinning. “But I’d better hurry, before you start looking at me as food.
Nate reared back a little, looked around for a second, and then continued. “You, Jack, are sitting in the middle of the Garden of Eden.”
Jack looked around at the sand and dunes and then looked back at Nate sceptically.
“Well, that’s the best I can figure it, anyway, Jack,” said Nate. “Stand up and look at the symbol on the rock here.” Nate gestured around the dark stone they were both sitting on with his nose.
Jack stood up and looked. Carved into the stone in a bas-relief was a representation of a large tree. The angled-pole that Nate was wrapped around was coming out of the trunk of the tree, right below where the main branches left the truck to reach out across the stone. It was very well done - it looked more like a tree had been reduced to almost two dimensions and embedded in the stone than it did like a carving.
Jack walked around and looked at the details in the fading light of the setting sun. He wished he’d looked at it while the sun was higher in the sky.
Wait! The sun was setting! That meant he was going to have to spend another night out here! Arrrgh!
Jack looked out across the desert for a little bit, and then came back and stood next to Nate. “In all the excitement, I almost forgot, Nate,” said Jack. “Which way is it back to town? And how far? I’m eventually going to have to head back - I’m not sure I’ll be able to survive by eating raw desert critters for long. And even if I can, I’m not sure I’ll want to.”
“It’s about 30 miles that way.” Nate pointed, with the rattle on his tail this time. As far as Jack could tell, it was a direction at right angles to the way he’d been going when he was crawling here. “But that’s 30 miles by the way the crow flies. It’s about 40 by the way a man walks. You should be able to do it in about half a day with your improved endurance, if you head out early tomorrow, Jack.”
Jack looked out the way the snake had pointed for a few seconds more, and then sat back down. It was getting dark. Not much he could do about heading out right now. And besides, Nate was just about to get to the interesting stuff. “Garden of Eden? As best as you can figure it?”
“Well, yeah, as best as I and Samuel could figure it anyway,” said Nate. “He figured that the story just got a little mixed up. You know, snake, in a ‘tree’, offering ‘temptations’, making bargains. That kind stuff. But he could never quite figure out how the Hebrews found out about this spot from across the ocean. He worried about that for a while.”
“Garden of Eden, hunh?” said Jack. “How long have you been here, Nate?”
“No idea, really,” replied Nate. “A long time. It never occurred to me to count years, until recently, and by then, of course, it was too late. But I do remember when this whole place was green, so I figure it’s been thousands of years, at least.”
“So, are you the snake that tempted Eve?” said Jack.
“Beats me,” said Nate. “Maybe. I can’t remember if the first one of your kind that I talked to was female or not, and I never got a name, but it could have been. And I suppose she could have considered my offer to grant requests a ‘temptation’, though I’ve rarely had refusals.”
“Well, umm, how did you get here then? And why is that white pole stuck out of the stone there?” asked Jack.
-
3rd Part (3 of 4)
“Dad left me here. Or, I assume it was my dad. It was another snake - much bigger than I was back then. I remember talking to him, but I don’t remember if it was in a language, or just kind of understanding what he wanted. But one day, he brought me to this stone, told me about it, and asked me to do something for him. I talked it over with him for a while, then agreed. I’ve been here ever since.
“What is this place?” said Jack. “And what did he ask you to do?”
“Well, you see this pole here, sticking out of the stone?” Nate loosened his coils around the tilted white pole and showed Jack where it descended into the stone. The pole was tilted at about a 45 degree angle and seemed to enter the stone in an eighteen inch slot cut into the stone. Jack leaned over and looked. The slot was dark and the pole went down into it as far as Jack could see in the dim light. Jack reached out to touch the pole, but Nate was suddenly there in the way.
“You can’t touch that yet, Jack,” said Nate.
“Why not?” asked Jack.
“I haven’t explained it to you yet,” replied Nate.
“Well, it kinda looks like a lever or something,” said Jack. “You’d push it that way, and it would move in the slot.”
“Yep, that’s what it is,” replied Nate.
“What does it do?” asked Jack. “End the world.”
“Oh, no,” said Nate. “Nothing that drastic. It just ends humanity. I call it ‘The Lever of Doom’.” For the last few words Nate had used a deeper, ringing voice. He tried to look serious for a few seconds, and then gave up and grinned.
Jack was initially startled by Nate’s pronouncement, but when Nate grinned Jack laughed. “Ha! You almost had me fooled for a second there. What does it really do?”
“Oh, it really ends humanity, like I said,” smirked Nate. “I just thought the voice I used was funny, didn’t you?”
Nate continued to grin.
“A lever to end humanity?” asked Jack. “What in the world is that for? Why would anyone need to end humanity?”
“Well,” replied Nate, “I get the idea that maybe humanity was an experiment. Or maybe the Big Guy just thought, that if humanity started going really bad, there should be a way to end it. I’m not really sure. All I know are the rules, and the guesses that Samuel and I had about why it’s here. I didn’t think to ask back when I started here.”
“Rules? What rules?” asked Jack.
“The rules are that I can’t tell anybody about it or let them touch it unless they agree to be bound to secrecy by a bite. And that only one human can be bound in that way at a time. That’s it.” explained Nate.
Jack looked somewhat shocked. “You mean that I could pull the lever now? You’d let me end humanity?”
“Yep,” replied Nate, “if you want to.” Nate looked at Jack carefully. “Do you want to, Jack?”
“Umm, no.” said Jack, stepping a little further back from the lever. “Why in the world would anyone want to end humanity? It’d take a psychotic to want that! Or worse, a suicidal psychotic, because it would kill him too, wouldn’t it?”
“Yep,” replied Nate, “being as he’d be human too.”
“Has anyone ever seriously considered it?” asked Nate. “Any of those bound to secrecy, that is?”
“Well, of course, I think they’ve all seriously considered it at one time or another. Being given that kind of responsibility makes you sit down and think, or so I’m told. Samuel considered it several times. He’d often get disgusted with humanity, come out here, and just hold the lever for a while. But he never pulled it. Or you wouldn’t be here.” Nate grinned some more.
Jack sat down, well back from the lever. He looked thoughtful and puzzled at the same time. After a bit, he said, “So this makes me the Judge of humanity? I get to decide whether they keep going or just end? Me?”
“That seems to be it,” agreed Nate.
“What kind of criteria do I use to decide?” said Jack. “How do I make this decision? Am I supposed to decide if they’re good? Or too many of them are bad? Or that they’re going the wrong way? Is there a set of rules for that?”
“Nope,” replied Nate. “You pretty much just have to decide on your own. It’s up to you, however you want to decide it. I guess that you’re just supposed to know.”
“But what if I get mad at someone? Or some girl dumps me and I feel horrible? Couldn’t I make a mistake? How do I know that I won’t screw up?” protested Jack.
Nate gave his kind of snake-like shrug again. “You don’t. You just have to try your best, Jack.”
Jack sat there for a while, staring off into the desert that was rapidly getting dark, chewing on a fingernail.
Suddenly, Jack turned around and looked at the snake. “Nate, was Samuel the one bound to this before me?”
“Yep,” replied Nate. “He was a good guy. Talked to me a lot. Taught me to read and brought me books. I think I still have a good pile of them buried in the sand around here somewhere. I still miss him. He died a few months ago.”
“Sounds like a good guy,” agreed Jack. “How did he handle this, when you first told him. What did he do?”
“Well,” said Nate, “he sat down for a while, thought about it for a bit, and then asked me some questions, much like you’re doing.”
“What did he ask you, if you’re allowed to tell me?” asked Jack.
“He asked me about the third request,” replied Nate.
“Aha!” It was Jack’s turn to grin. “And what did you tell him?”
“I told him the rules for the third request. That to get the third request you have to agree to this whole thing. That if it ever comes to the point that you really think that humanity should be ended, that you’ll come here and end it. You won’t avoid it, and you won’t wimp out.” Nate looked serious again. “And you’ll be bound to do it too, Jack.”
“Hmmm.” Jack looked back out into the darkness for a while.
Nate watched him, waiting.
“Nate,” continued Jack, quietly, eventually. “What did Samuel ask for with his third request?”
Nate sounded like he was grinning again as he replied, also quietly, “Wisdom, Jack. He asked for wisdom. As much as I could give him.”
“Ok,” said Jack, suddenly, standing up and facing away from Nate, “give it to me.
Nate looked at Jack’s backside. “Give you what, Jack?”
“Give me that wisdom. The same stuff that Samuel asked for. If it helped him, maybe it’ll help me too.” Jack turned his head to look back over his shoulder at Nate. “It did help him, right?”
“He said it did,” replied Nate. “But he seemed a little quieter afterward. Like he had a lot to think about.”
“Well, yeah, I can see that,” said Jack. “So, give it to me.” Jack turned toface away from Nate again, bent over slightly and tensed up.
Nate watched Jack tense up with a little exasperation. If he bit Jack now, Jack would likely jump out of his skin and maybe hurt them both.
“You remember that you’ll be bound to destroy humanity if it ever looks like it needs it, right Jack?” asked Nate, shifting position.
“Yeah, yeah, I got that,” replied Jack, eyes squeezed tightly shut and body tense, not noticing the change in direction of Nate’s voice.
“And,” continued Nate, from his new position, “do you remember that you’ll turn bright purple, and grow big horns and extra eyes?”
“Yeah, yeah…Hey, wait a minute!” said Jack, opening his eyes, straightening up and turning around. “Purple?!” He didn’t see Nate there. With the moonlight Jack could see that the lever extended up from its slot in the rock without the snake wrapped around it.
Jack heard, from behind him, Nate’s “Just Kidding!” right before he felt the now familiar piercing pain, this time in the other buttock.
Jack sat on the edge of the dark stone in the rapidly cooling air, his feet extending out into the sand. He stared out into the darkness, listening to the wind stir the sand, occasionally rubbing his butt where he’d been recently bitten.
Nate had left for a little while, had come back with a desert-rodent-shaped bulge somewhere in his middle, and was now wrapped back around the lever, his tongue flicking out into the desert night’s air the only sign that he was still awake.
Occasionally Jack, with his toes absentmindedly digging in the sand while he thought, would ask Nate a question without turning around.
“Nate, do accidents count?”
Nate lifted his head a little bit. “What do you mean, Jack?”
Jack tilted his head back like he was looking at the stars. “You know, accidents. If I accidentally fall on the lever, without meaning to, does that still wipe out humanity?”
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure it does, Jack. I’d suggest you be careful about that if you start feeling wobbly,” said Nate with some amusement.
A little later - “Does it have to be me that pulls the lever?” asked Jack.
“That’s the rule, Jack. Nobody else can pull it,” answered Nate.
“No,” Jack shook his head, “I meant does it have to be my hand? Could I pull the lever with a rope tied around it? Or push it with a stick? Or throw a rock?”
“Yes, those should work,” replied Nate. “Though I’m not sure how complicated you could get. Samuel thought about trying to build some kind of remote control for it once, but gave it up. Everything he’d build would be gone by the next sunrise, if it was touching the stone, or over it. I told him that in the past others that had been bound had tried to bury the lever so they wouldn’t be tempted to pull it, but every time the stones or sand or whatever had disappeared.”
“Wow,” said Jack, “Cool.” Jack leaned back until only his elbows kept him off of the stone and looked up into the sky.
“Nate, how long did Samuel live? One of his wishes was for health too, right?” asked Jack.
“Yes,” replied Nate, “it was. He lived 167 years, Jack.”
“Wow, 167 years. That’s almost 140 more years I’ll live if I live as long. Do you know what he died of, Nate?”
“He died of getting tired of living, Jack,” Nate said, sounding somewhat sad.
Jack turned his head to look at Nate in the starlight.
Nate looked back. “Samuel knew he wasn’t going to be able to stay in society. He figured that they’d eventually see him still alive and start questioning it, so he decided that he’d have to disappear after a while. He faked his death once, but changed his mind - he decided it was too early and he could stay for a little longer. He wasn’t very fond of mankind, but he liked the attention. Most of the time, anyway.
“His daughter and then his wife dying almost did him in though. He didn’t stay in society much longer after that. He eventually came out here to spend time talking to me and thinking about pulling the lever. A few months ago he told me he’d had enough. It was his time.”
“And then he just died?” asked Jack.
Nate shook his head a little. “He made his forth request, Jack. There’s only one thing you can ask for the fourth request. The last bite.
After a bit Nate continued, “He told me that he was tired, that it was his time. He reassured me that someone new would show up soon, like they always had.
After another pause, Nate finished, “Samuel’s body disappeared off the stone with the sunrise.”
Jack lay back down and looked at the sky, leaving Nate alone with his memories. It was a long time until Jack’s breathing evened out into sleep.
Jack woke with the sunrise the next morning. He was a little chilled with the morning desert air, but overall was feeling pretty good. Well, except that his stomach was grumbling and he wasn’t willing to eat raw desert rat.
So, after getting directions to town from Nate, making sure he knew how to get back, and reassuring Nate that he’d be back soon, Jack started the long walk back to town. With his new health and Nate’s good directions, he made it back easily.
Jack caught a bus back to the city, and showed up for work the next day, little worse for the wear and with a story about getting lost in the desert and walking back out. Within a couple of days Jack had talked a friend with a tow truck into going back out into the desert with him to fetch the SUV. They found it after a couple of hours of searching and towed it back without incident. Jack was careful not to even look in the direction of Nate’s lever, though their path back didn’t come within sight of it.
Before the next weekend, Jack had gone to a couple of stores, including a book store, and had gotten his SUV back from the mechanic, with a warning to avoid any more joyriding in the desert. On Saturday, Jack headed back to see Nate.
Jack parked a little way out of the small town near Nate, loaded up his new backpack with camping gear and the things he was bringing for Nate, and then started walking. He figured that walking would leave the least trail, and he knew that while not many people camped in the desert, it wasn’t unheard of, and shouldn’t really raise suspicions.
Jack had brought more books for Nate - recent books, magazines, newspapers. Some things that would catch Nate up with what was happening in the world, others that were just good books to read. He spent the weekend with Nate, and then headed out again, telling Nate that he’d be back again soon, but that he had things to do first.
Over four months later Jack was back to see Nate again. This time he brought a laptop with him - a specially modified laptop. It had a solar recharger, special filters and seals to keep out the sand, a satellite link-up, and a special keyboard and joystick that Jack hoped that a fifteen-foot rattlesnake would be able to use. And, it had been hacked to not give out its location to the satellite.
After that Jack could e-mail Nate to keep in touch, but still visited him fairly regularly - at least once or twice a year.
After the first year, Jack quit his job. For some reason, with the wisdom he ‘d been given, and the knowledge that he could live for over 150 years, working in a nine to five job for someone else didn’t seem that worthwhile any more. Jack went back to school.
Eventually, Jack started writing. Perhaps because of the wisdom, or perhaps because of his new perspective, he wrote well. People liked what he wrote, and he became well known for it. After a time, Jack bought an RV and started traveling around the country for book signings and readings.
But, he still remembered to drop by and visit Nate occasionally.
On one of the visits Nate seemed quieter than usual. Not that Nate had been a fountain of joy lately. Jack’s best guess was that Nate was still missing Samuel, and though Jack had tried, he still hadn’t been able to replace Samuel in Nate’s eyes. Nate had been getting quieter each visit. But on this visit Nate didn’t even speak when Jack walked up to the lever. He nodded at Jack, and then went back to staring into the desert. Jack, respecting Nate’s silence, sat down and waited.
After a few minutes, Nate spoke. “Jack, I have someone to introduce you to.”
Jack looked surprised. “Someone to introduce me to?” Jack looked around, and then looked carefully back at Nate. “This something to do with the Big Guy?
“No, no,” replied Nate. “This is more personal. I want you to meet my son.” Nate looked over at the nearest sand dune. “Sammy!”
Jack watched as a four foot long desert rattlesnake crawled from behind the dune and up to the stone base of the lever.
“Yo, Jack,” said the new, much smaller snake.
“Yo, Sammy” replied Jack. Jack looked at Nate. “Named after Samuel, I assume?”
Nate nodded. “Jack, I’ve got a favor to ask you. Could you show Sammy around for me?” Nate unwrapped himself from the lever and slithered over to the edge of the stone and looked across the sands. “When Samuel first told me about the world, and brought me books and pictures, I wished that I could go see it. I wanted to see the great forests, the canyons, the cities, even the other deserts, to see if they felt and smelled the same. I want my son to have that chance - to see the world. Before he becomes bound here like I have been.
“He’s seen it in pictures, over the computer that you brought me. But I hear that it’s not the same. That being there is different. I want him to have that. Think you can do that for me, Jack?”
Jack nodded. This was obviously very important to Nate, so Jack didn’t even joke about taking a talking rattlesnake out to see the world. “Yeah, I can do that for you, Nate. Is that all you need?” Jack could sense that was something more.
Nate looked at Sammy. Sammy looked back at Nate for a second and then said, “Oh, yeah. Ummm, I’ve gotta go pack. Back in a little bit Jack. Nice to meet ya!” Sammy slithered back over the dune and out of sight.
Nate watched Sammy disappear and then looked back at Jack. “Jack, this is my first son. My first offspring through all the years. You don’t even want to know what it took for me to find a mate.” Nate grinned to himself. “But anyway, I had a son for a reason. I’m tired. I’m ready for it to be over. I needed a replacement.”
Jack considered this for a minute. “So, you’re ready to come see the world, and you wanted him to watch the lever while you were gone?”
Nate shook his head. “No, Jack - you’re a better guesser than that. You’ve already figured out - I’m bound here - there’s only one way for me to leave here. And I’m ready. It’s my time to die.”
Jack looked more closely at Nate. He could tell Nate had thought about this - probably for quite a while. Jack had trouble imagining what it would be like to be as old as Nate, but Jack could already tell that in another hundred or two hundred years, he might be getting tired of life himself. Jack could understand Samuel’s decision, and now Nate’s. So, all Jack said was, “What do you want me to do?”
Nate nodded. “Thanks, Jack. I only want two things. One - show Sammy around the world - let him get his fill of it, until he’s ready to come back here and take over. Two - give me the fourth request.
“I can’t just decide to die, not any more than you can. I won’t even die of old age like you eventually will, even though it’ll be a long time from now. I need to be killed. Once Sammy is back here, ready to take over, I’ll be able to die. And I need you to kill me.
-
waaaaaaaaaaat !!!!!!!!!! R U SEROUS MATE :P :P :P
continuation,.... looool.... I wonder who made it up :P
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THE FINAL PART
PART 4
“I’ve even thought about how. Poisons and other drugs won’t work on me. And I’ve seen pictures of snakes that were shot - some of them live for days, so that’s out too. So, I want you to bring back a sword.
Nate turned away to look back to the dune that Sammy had gone behind. “I’d say an axe, but that’s somewhat undignified - putting my head on the ground or a chopping block like that. No, I like a sword. A time-honored way of going out. A dignified way to die. And, most importantly, it should work, even on me.
“You willing to do that for me, Jack?” Nate turned back to look at Jack.
“Yeah, Nate,” replied Jack solemnly, “I think I can handle that.”
Nate nodded. “Good!” He turned back toward the dune and shouted, “Sammy! Jack’s about ready to leave!” Then quietly, “Thanks, Jack.”
Jack didn’t have anything to say to that, so he waited for Sammy to make it back to the lever, nodded to him, nodded a final time to Nate, and then headed into the desert with Sammy following. Over the next several years Sammy and Jack kept in touch with Nate through e-mail as they went about their adventures. They made a goal of visiting every country in the world, and did a respectable job of it. Sammy had a natural gift for languages, as Jack expected he would, and even ended up acting as a translator for Jack in a few of the countries. Jack managed to keep the talking rattlesnake hidden, even so, and by the time they were nearing the end of their tour of countries, Sammy had only been spotted a few times. While there were several people that had seen enough to startle them greatly, nobody had enough evidence to prove anything, and while a few wild rumors and storied followed Jack and Sammy around, nothing ever hit the newspapers or the public in general.
When they finished the tour of countries, Jack suggested that they try some undersea diving. They did. And spelunking. They did that too. Sammy finally drew the line at visiting Antarctica. He’d come to realize that Jack was stalling. After talking to his Dad about it over e-mail, he figured out that Jack probably didn’t want to have to kill Nate. Nate told Sammy that humans could be squeamish about killing friends and acquaintances.
So, Sammy eventually put his tail down (as he didn’t have a foot) and told Jack that it was time - he was ready to go back and take up his duties from his dad. Jack, delayed it a little more by insisting that they go back to Japan and buy an appropriate sword. He even stretched it a little more by getting lessons in how to use the sword. But, eventually, he’d learned as much as he was likely to without dedicating his life to it, and was definitely competent enough to take the head off of a snake. It was time to head back and see Nate.
When they got back to the US, Jack got the old RV out of storage where he and Sammy had left it after their tour of the fifty states, he loaded up Sammy and the sword, and they headed for the desert.
When they got to the small town that Jack had been trying to find those years ago when he’d met Nate, Jack was in a funk. He didn’t really feel like walking all of the way out there. Not only that, but he’d forgotten to figure the travel time correctly, and it was late afternoon. They’d either have to spend the night in town and walk out tomorrow, or walk in the dark.
As Jack was afraid that if he waited one more night he might lose his resolve, he decided that he’d go ahead and drive the RV out there. It was only going to be this once, and Jack would go back and cover the tracks afterward. They ought to be able to make it out there by nightfall if they drove, and then they could get it over tonight.
Jack told Sammy to e-mail Nate that they were coming as he drove out of sight of the town on the road. They then pulled off the road and headed out into the desert.
Everything went well, until they got to the sand dunes. Jack had been nursing the RV along the whole time, over the rocks, through the creek beds, revving the engine the few times they almost got stuck. When they came to the dunes, Jack didn’t really think about it, he just downshifted and headed up the first one. By the third dune, Jack started to regret that he’d decided to try driving on the sand. The RV was fishtailling and losing traction. Jack was having to work it up each dune slowly and was trying to keep from losing control each time they came over the top and slid down the other side. Sammy had come up to sit in the passenger seat, coiled up and laughing at Jack’s driving.
As they came over the top of the fourth dune, the biggest one yet, Jack saw that this was the final dune - the stone, the lever, and somewhere Nate, waited below. Jack put on the brakes, but he’d gone a little too far. The RV started slipping down the other side.
Jack tried turning the wheel, but he didn’t have enough traction. He pumped the brakes - no response. They started sliding down the hill, faster and faster.
Jack felt a shock go through him as he suddenly realized that they were heading for the lever. He looked down - the RV was directly on course for it. If Jack didn’t do something, the RV would hit it. He was about to end humanity.
Jack steered more frantically, trying to get traction. It still wasn’t working. The dune was too steep, and the sand too loose. In a split second, Jack realized that his only chance would be once he hit the stone around the lever - he should have traction on the stone for just a second before he hit the lever - he wouldn’t have time to stop, but he should be able to steer away.
Jack took a better grip on the steering wheel and tried to turn the RV a little bit - every little bit would help. He’d have to time his turn just right.
The RV got to the bottom of the dune, sliding at an amazing speed in the sand. Just before they reached the stone Jack looked across it to check that they were still heading for the lever. They were. But Jack noticed something else that he hadn’t seen from the top of the dune. Nate wasn’t wrapped around the lever. He was off to the side of the lever, but still on the stone, waiting for them. The problem was, he was waiting on the same side of the lever that Jack had picked to steer towards to avoid the lever. The RV was already starting to drift that way a little in its mad rush across the sand and there was no way that Jack was going to be able to go around the lever to the other side.
Jack had an instant of realization. He was either going to have to hit the lever, or run over Nate. He glanced over at Sammy and saw that Sammy realized the same thing.
Jack took a firmer grip on the steering wheel as the RV ran up on the stone. Shouting to Sammy as he pulled the steering wheel, “BETTER NATE THAN LEVER,” he ran over the snake.
THE END
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what the ... !!!
who's the bored person who sat and typed all that :P
and please sgvaibhav, if u read it, tell us all about it :)
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loooool...!!
yeah... seems interesting.. are you sure its a joke and not a story ....:P
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dunno
my first joke
has to be a grand one :P
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hehe... yup.. and it sure was !
:P +REPP
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who ever reads this, i will donate, one email account to him. all he has to do is to explain me this thing.
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if i am goign to get +rep by posting jokes, then i have thousands of good jokes.
wow i am going to post all :P
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loool....! "all" he has to do ..:P
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sgaivbhav, we have a small rule here, we dont post any jokes that are more than 2 meters long :P jk
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One train which was going peacefully on the rail-tracks suddenly deviated from the tracks and went to the fields nearby and then came back on the tracks.
The passengers were horrified. On the next Railway station the driver was caught : He was found to be a Blonde.
He was questioned . He explained that there was a man standing on the tracks and he was not moving from there even after lots of honks etc.
Then authorities questioned : Mr.B are you mad!?? just to save life of one person you put life of so many passengers under danger.You should have overran that person.
Mr. B said : Exactly, that is what i also decided, but this idiot started running towards the field when the train came close.
All u have to do is give me +rep.
and they will keep pouring in
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The rabbit that was on drugs?
Running through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint. The rabbit looks at her and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do this? Come with me running through the forest, you'll see, you'll feel so much better!" The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit.
Then they come across an elephant doing coke, so the rabbit again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health. Come running with us through the pretty forest, you'll see, you'll feel so good!" The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and all, then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe.
The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up and the rabbit again says, "Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health! Come running with us through the sunny forest, you will feel so good!"
The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and starts to beat up the rabbit. As the giraffe and elephant watch in horror, they look at him and ask, "Lion, why did you do this? He was merely trying to help us all!"
The lion answers, " He makes me run around the forest like an idiot each time he's on ecstasy!"
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hehe, keep em coming ;) +REP :)
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A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup. The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.. At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results:
The first worm in alcohol - Dead.
The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead
Third worm in chocolate syrup - Dead
Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive.
So the Minister asked the congregation - What can you learn from this demonstration?
An old woman sitting in the back quickly raised her hand and said,
‘As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won’t have worms!’
That pretty much ended the service
They are coming
(i meant jokes)
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Driving like mom
Two friends were driving to the store and on the way, they came upon an
intersection with a stoplight. The light showed red, but the driver
went right through the red light. The passenger screamed at the driver,
“What are you doing? You’re going to get us killed!”
The drive said, “Don’t worry, my mother always drives like this.”
Later on, they came to another stoplight which was red. The driver sped
right through the light. Again the passenger looked at the driver and
said, “I thought I told you, you’re gonna get us killed! Would you
please stop this nonsense!”
The driver said, “All right! I get it, but I told you my mother drives
like this all the time.”
They came to another intersection, but this time the light was green.
The driver slammed on his brakes and stopped the car completely. The
passenger yelled, “What are you doing now? This is the third time you
almost got us killed. Why did you stop at a green light?”
“My mother might be coming the other way.”
By the way if anyone has any jokes, plz feel free to post it!
Waiting for +reps
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loooolll
Karma Dude, karma ...:P
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Lawn mover trade
A preacher was making his rounds on a bicycle, when he
came upon a little boy trying to sell a lawn mower.
‘How much do you want for the mower?’ asked the preacher.
‘I just want enough money to go out and buy a bicycle,’ said the little boy.
After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked,
Will you take my bike in trade for it?’
The little boy asked if he could try it out first.
After riding it around a little while, said,
‘Mister,you’ve got yourself a deal.’
The preacher took the mower and began to crank it.
He pulled on the rope a few times with no response from the mower.
The preacher called the little boy over and said, ‘I can’t get this mower to start.’
The boy said, ‘That’s because you have to cuss at it to get it started.’
The preacher said, I can’t cuss.
It’s been so long since I became a Christian that I don’t even remember how to cuss.’
The little boy looked at him happily and said,
‘You just keep pulling on that rope.
It’ll come back to ya.
Should i post like 50 more now only, or later?
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lol, nice jokes :P
and ya, i cant +REP again, cause of karma !! :)
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haha!! thx sgvaibhav for postin in my thread ..+rep for u!!
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oky... Im starting to get reaallly boreed ... wots new peeps ?
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oky... Im starting to get reaallly boreed ... wots new peeps ?
lol!! r u done studyin??! :P
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I hope so ... :-X
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oky... Im starting to get reaallly boreed ... wots new peeps ?
lol!! r u done studyin??! :P
i have 2 papers tom. at the same time, and i am hardly done with only 1 paper.
i dont know anything about the second paper :'( :'(
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The Bad News Just Gets worse...
At dawn the telephone rings. "Hello, Senor Rod? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house."
"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"
"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor Rod that your parrot died.
"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"
"Yes, Senor, that's the one."
"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird." "What did he die from?"
"From eating rotten meat, Senor Rod"
"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"
"Nobody, Senor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."
"Dead horse? What dead horse?"
"The thoroughbred, Senor Rod."
"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"
"Yes Senor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart."
"Are you insane? What water cart?"
"The one we used to put out the fire, Senor"
"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"
"The one at your house, Senor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire."
"What the hell??....Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle??!!!
"Yes Senor Rod."
"But there's electricity at the house!!! What was the candle for?"
"For the funeral, Senor Rod."
"WHAT FUNERAL??"
"Your wife's, Senor Rod... She showed up one night out of the blue and I thought she was a thief, So I hit her with your new Tiger Woods' Nike Driver."
SILENCE.................. ,
LONG SILENCE....
...
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i have 2 papers tom. at the same time, and i am hardly done with only 1 paper.
i dont know anything about the second paper :'( :'(
:o :o :o
then why are u joking around ?? :P
go study friend, we dont want to be blamed for ur bad marks :)
gd luck
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i want to study but...
hmm
dont know something is wrong with me
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go study ppl :P :P
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i want to study but...
hmm
dont know something is wrong with me
hehe, whats arong mate ?? u wanna joke? lol
what do u have tomorow?
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EM P1
1.5 hours
and bio p3
1 hour 15 mins
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yeas sgbaihav ... I feel the SAAAAAME !!!!!!
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Be right back
let me try to concentrate
u will see me online if i am not able to
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EM P1
1.5 hours
and bio p3
1 hour 15 mins
well u must have studied for bio 2 days ago, so no need for that (u seem like a bio guy :P)
but i dunno about economics, the members make it feel hard, ok, so post 2 more jokes and do some revision, what do u say mate ??
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Be right back
let me try to concentrate
u will see me online if i am not able to
no u willl isA n we all will b bk by 10 ya by then ;)
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cant concentrate :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
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cant concentrate :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
go to the family thread :P
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cant concentrate :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
go to the family thread :P
as if he will dere ;D
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Doctor, "What seems to be the problem?"
Patient, "Doc, I've got the farts. I mean I fart all the time,"
The Doctor nods, "Hmm."
Patient, "My farts do not stink and you can't hear them. It's just that I fart all the time. Look, we've been talking here for about 10 minutes and I've farted five times. You didn't hear them and you don't smell them, do you?"
"Hmm," says the Doctor,
He picks up his pad and writes out a prescription.
The patient is thrilled "Great doc. This prescription, will it really clear up my farts?"
"No," sighs the Doctor, "The prescription is to clear your sinuses. Next week I want you back here for a hearing test."
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lollzz... :D :D
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ahahahaha, looool, nice one baby_femme ;)
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Did you hear about the snail that got beat up by two turtles?
At the police station they asked him, “Did you get a good look at the turtles that did this? He said, “No, it all happened so fast.”
-----------------------------------------------
hehe
These four gents go out to play golf one sunny morning. One is detained in the clubhouse, and the other three are discussing their children while walking to the first tee. "My son," says one, "has made quite a name for himself in the homebuilding industry. He began as a carpenter, but now owns his own design and construction firm. He's so successful in fact, in the last year he was able to give a good friend a brand new home as a gift."
The second man, not to be outdone, allows how his son began his career as a car salesman, but now owns a multi-line dealership. "He's so successful, in fact, in the last six months he gave a friend two brand new cars as a gift."
The third man's son has worked his way up through a stock brokerage and in the last few weeks has given a good friend a large stock portfolio as a gift.
As the fourth man arrives at the tee box, another tells him that they have been discussing their progeny and asks what line his son is in.
"To tell the truth, I'm not very pleased with how my son has turned out, he replies. "For fifteen years, he's been a hairdresser, and I've just recently discovered he's a practicing homosexual. But, on the bright side, he must be good at what he does because his last three boyfriends have given him a brand new house, two cars, and a big pile of stock certificates."
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loooool...!!!
I like the first one... its lame !! :P :P :P
and I cudnt be bovered to read the next one. I think Ive done too much reading :P
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loooooooooooollllllllll
nyc joke '
add more !!!
will +rep later lol
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Shut Up and Trouble were walking down a path. Trouble got lost. So, Shut Up went to the police officer. The police officer asked, "What's your name?"
He answered, "Shut Up."
He asked again "What's your name?"
"Shut Up."
The police officer asked, "Are you looking for trouble?!"
"Yeah, I lost him down a path about two miles ago."
:P
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looooolll...!!!
I oredy knew tht one .:P
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hahaha lol
add more lol
i wanna not get bored ;D
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Two friends are talking and one says to the other; “I am so tired of people not understanding what I'm talking about.
His friend asks; “What do you mean?”
--------------------------------------------------
someone got owwwned :P
A man calls home to his wife and says, "Honey I have been asked to go fishing at a big lake up in Canada with my boss and several of his friends. We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting, so would you please pack me enough clothes for a week and set out my rod and tackle box. We're leaving from the office and I will swing by the house to pick my things up. Oh! And please pack my new blue silk pajamas."
The wife thinks this sounds a little fishy but being a good wife she does exactly what her husband asked. The following weekend he comes home a little tired but otherwise looking good.
The wife welcomes him home and asks if he caught many fish. He says, "Yes! Lots of Walleye, some Blue gill, and a few Pike. But why didn't you pack my new blue silk pajamas like I asked you to do?"
The wife replies; "I did, they were in your tackle box." :P
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hahaha a little too much, tell me to delete it if its offensive :P
There was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant. So, he went to the doctor to have a sperm count done. The doctor told him to take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back the next day. The elderly man came back the next day and the specimen cup was empty and the lid was on it. Doctor: What was the problem? Elderly man: Well, you I tried with my right hand...nothing. So, I tried with my left hand...nothing. My wife tried with her right hand...nothing. Her left hand...nothing. Her mouth...nothing. Then my wife's friend tried. Right hand, left hand, mouth....still nothing. Doctor: Wait a minute. You mean your wife's friend too?! Elderly man: Yeah, and we still couldn't get the lid off of the specimen cup.
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lol i got 1 4 u !
Blonde at Football Game
A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game.
She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand."
"What did you not understand ?"
And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"
if u guyz liked it +rep nd i ll add more
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hahahahaha lol :P
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Once there were 3 people in an airplane, one took a bite out of
an apple. She thought it was too sweet so she threw it out of
the plane. The second person took a bite out of a lemon and she
thought it was too sour so, she threw it out of the plane. Then
the last person took a bite out of a grenade and he thought it
was too crunchy so, he threw it out of the plane. Then they
landed and decided to go for a walk. They first passed a little
girl who was crying and they asked, "little girl, little girl,
why are you crying?" and the little girl said, "an apple came
down and killed my new kitty". Next they passed a little boy
who
was also crying. And they again asked, "little boy, little boy,
why are you crying?" and the little boy said, "a lemon came
down
and killed my new puppy." Then they passed a blonde sitting on
the side walk laughing her butt off. They asked, "why are you
laughing so hard?" and the blonde said, "I farted and the
building behind me blew up!!"
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LOOOOOLLL....!!!
haha ... tht was funnnnny !!
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hahaha lmaooooo
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hehehehe Thanks 1 more :D
This blonde was driving home one day on the highway when suddenly she saw a dead rabbit. She put on her brakes and screeched to a stop. Behind her were tons of other cars. She got out of her car and began asking all the people behind her if they had a can of hairspray. One person asked her why she had stopped and why she needed hairspray. The blonde told him to come to the front of her car. So he went to the front and saw a dead rabbit laying there. The person gave her a can of hairspray. The blonde replied, "Thank you." And the guy said, "Why do you need the hairspray?" The blonde sprayed it all over the rabbit and said, "The bottle says it revives dead hairs."
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HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAAH ...........OMG.... i need to stop visiting this thread... my cheeks are hurting ..:P
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hahahaha lol am gonna make u laugh more *evil laugh*
dnt stop visitin though :P
if u want i wont add more :)
There were 11 people holding onto a rope that came down from a plane. Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette. They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn't then the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette said, "I'll get off." After a really touching speech from the brunette saying she would get off, all of the blondes started clapping.
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zainy ur jokes are killers :P
keep em comming, +REP ;)
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hahahaha lol am gonna make u laugh more *evil laugh*
dnt stop visitin though :P
if u want i wont add more :)
There were 11 people holding onto a rope that came down from a plane. Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette. They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn't then the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette said, "I'll get off." After a really touching speech from the brunette saying she would get off, all of the blondes started clapping.
Loooool gr8 joke ;)
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thhhnnnnnnnnkkkkkkkkkk uuuuuuuuuuuu
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one more !!
Breaking Out Of Jail
A brunette, a red-head and a blonde were in jail when they decided to break out. The girls broke out and the brunette said,
"Let's hide in that barn, they'll never find us."
So they climed up the ladder and then the blonde threw it down.
The next morning, the cops said, "Come out with your hands in the air!"
The red-head said, "Hide in those baskets, they'll never find us!"
So the Brunette got in the first one, the red-head got in the second one and the blonde got in the third one. Meanwhile, the cops were getting a ladder set up and trying to get up there. Once they got up, the seargent ordered them to kick the baskets.
So the cop kicked the first one: "RUFF."
"It's just a damn dog!" yelled the cop.
The cop kicked the next one: "MEOW."
"It's just a damn cat," yelled the cop.
The cop kicked the next basket and the blonde yelled, "POTATOES!"
u guyz i want jokes frm u 2 ! :P
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Girls Night Out (hope its not too over rated :P) u will lol
Two women friends had gone for a girl's night out. Both were very faithful and loving wives, however they had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi Breezers.
Incredibly drunk and walking home, they needed to pee. So they decided to stop in a nearby cemetery. Having nothing to wipe with, one of them thought she would take off her panties and use them.
Her friend however was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin them, but was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with a ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with that. After the girls did their business they proceeded to go home.
The next day one of the women's husbands was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said "These damn girl's nights out have got to stop. I'm starting to suspect the worst. My wife came home with no panties!"
"That's nothing" said the other husband, "Mine came back with a card stuck between the crack of her "behind" that said "From all of us at the Fire Station. We'll never forget you."
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Punctuation
An English professor wrote the words
"A woman without her man is nothing"
on the chalkboard and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.
All of the males in the class wrote:
"A woman, without her man, is nothing."
All the females in the class wrote:
"A woman: without her, man is nothing."
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Why study? (thats a classic :P)
Instead of studying for the last exam of their college careers, four seniors spent the night partying in the house they had rentedoff campus. The next morning they waited until the test would bealmost finished, and then made their way to class. Along the way they all put grease on their hands to support the story they were going to tell their professor. The class was almost done with the exam, when all four seniors burst into the room. They report to the professor that they had a flat tyre along the way and could they please retake the test? The professor said that he was a reasonable man, so he scheduled a test date for the following week.
Their plan had worked!
They studied diligently for the next week, making the most of their time. The day of the make-up came, andthey were ready for anything. Each senior was placed alone in a separate classroom for the test. The first question, worth 5 points, was easy. The second question was worth 95 points, and it simply read, "Which tyre?"
-
Cup Final Seat (this man is a real footy fan :P)
A guy named Bob receives a free ticket to the FA Cup Final from his company. Unfortunately, when Bob arrives at the stadium he realizes the seat is in the last row in the corner of the stadium.
About halfway through the first half, Bob notices an empty seat 5 rows off the pitch right on the halfway line. He decides to take a chance and makes his way through the stadium and around the security guards to the empty seat.
As he sits down, he asks the elderly gentleman sitting next to him, "Excuse me, is anyone sitting here?" The man says no.
Now, very excited to be in such a great seat for the game, Bob again inquires of the man next to him, "This is incredible! Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Cup Final and not use it?" The man replies, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me, I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Cup Final we haven't been to together since we got married in 1962."
"Well, that's really sad," says Bob, "but still, couldn't you find someone to take the seat? A relative or a close friend?"
"No," the man replies, "they're all at the funeral."
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hahha
nice ones
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Thanks adi ;)
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Blond in a bath
A blond woman buys a bath, the next day she returnes to the shop claiming it's broken and leaking water, she says every time i fill it up it just empties. The shop keeper replies have you put the plug in it, she replys "I never knew it was electrical"
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The Monk (voted best ending to a religous joke :P)
A man is driving down the road when his car breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, "My car has broken down. Do you think I could stay the night?"
The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound.
The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk." The man is disappointed but thanks themanyway and goes about his merry way.
Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.
The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk."
The man says, "All right, all right. I'm dying to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?"
The monks reply, "You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk."
The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, "I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth."
The monks reply, "Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound." The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, "The sound is right behind that door."
The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, "Real funny. May I have the key?" The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, amethyst...
Finally, the monks say, "This is the last key to the last door." The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.....
But I can't tell YOU what it is, because YOU'RE not a monk!
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lol, that was so good Q80BOY !!!
i was actually dying to know wat it was
oh well........... :D
-
time for my joke to get +rep
xD
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lol, that was so good Q80BOY !!!
i was actually dying to know wat it was
oh well........... :D
it gets u on the edge of ur seat dunnit?
-
time for my joke to get +rep
xD
ill give u one b4
cuz i know itll be a good one ;D
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Staff IQ Test
Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately. OK?
Let's find out just how clever you really are.
Ready? GO!!! (Scroll down)
First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?
Answer: If you answered that you are first, and then you are absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second! Try not to screw up in the next question.
To answer the second question, don't take as much time as you took for the first question.
Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...?
Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, and then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?
You're not very good at this! Are you?
Third Question:
Very tricky math! Note: This must be done in your head only.
Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000 Now add 10. What is the total?
Scroll down for answer.
Did you get 5000?
The correct answer is actually 4100.
Don't believe it? Check with your calculator! Today is definitely not your day. Maybe you will get the last question right?
Fourth Question:
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono.
What is the name of the fifth daughter?
Answer: Nunu?
NO! Of course not.
Her name is Mary. Read the question again
Okay, now the bonus round:
There is a mute person who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.
Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses, how should he express himself?
He just has to open his mouth and ask, so simple.
-
Staff IQ Test
Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately. OK?
Let's find out just how clever you really are.
Ready? GO!!! (Scroll down)
First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?
Answer: If you answered that you are first, and then you are absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second! Try not to screw up in the next question.
To answer the second question, don't take as much time as you took for the first question.
Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...?
Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, and then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?
You're not very good at this! Are you?
Third Question:
Very tricky math! Note: This must be done in your head only.
Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000 Now add 10. What is the total?
Scroll down for answer.
Did you get 5000?
The correct answer is actually 4100.
Don't believe it? Check with your calculator! Today is definitely not your day. Maybe you will get the last question right?
Fourth Question:
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono.
What is the name of the fifth daughter?
Answer: Nunu?
NO! Of course not.
Her name is Mary. Read the question again
Okay, now the bonus round:
There is a mute person who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.
Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses, how should he express himself?
He just has to open his mouth and ask, so simple.
these are awsome!!
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Thanks :D
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wow!! nice jokes peeps :P
-
Thanks u want more ;D :P
luv u ! :-*
-
Thanks u want more ;D :P
luv u ! :-*
HEYYYYYYY ZAINY!!! HOW R U???!!
YA YA GIMME MORE :P
-
hey shoshou !!!
kkkkkkkkkkkk thennnnnnn ill giv u More !
jus wait 2 min :)
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tyt :D
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Thanks u want more ;D :P
luv u ! :-*
yesyes more plz
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Breaking Out Of Jail
A brunette, a red-head and a blonde were in jail when they decided to break out. The girls broke out and the brunette said,
"Let's hide in that barn, they'll never find us."
So they climed up the ladder and then the blonde threw it down.
The next morning, the cops said, "Come out with your hands in the air!"
The red-head said, "Hide in those baskets, they'll never find us!"
So the Brunette got in the first one, the red-head got in the second one and the blonde got in the third one. Meanwhile, the cops were getting a ladder set up and trying to get up there. Once they got up, the seargent ordered them to kick the baskets.
So the cop kicked the first one: "RUFF."
"It's just a damn dog!" yelled the cop.
The cop kicked the next one: "MEOW."
"It's just a damn cat," yelled the cop.
The cop kicked the next basket and the blonde yelled, "POTATOES!"
u want more :P ::)
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! More More !
::) ::)
-
hahahahaha!!
ur soooooo hyper today baby :P :P
More More :P :P :P
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Blonde going to Electronic Store
A blonde walks into a electronic store and asks the manager, "Can I buy that TV"
"No"
"Why not?"
"Because your a blonde."
So the blonde goes out and dyes her hair red. She returned to the electronic store and said, "Can I buy that TV?"
"No"
"Why not?"
"Your a blonde."
So the blonde goes and shaves her hair off and returns to the electronic store and says, "Can I buy that TV?"
"No"
"Why not?"
"You're a blonde"
"How can you tell I'm a blonde, I dyed my hair red, then shaved it off!"
"Because that's not a TV, that's a microwave!"
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ya i guess im hyper lol
jus finished off bio soo i think im supposed 2 be happy
lol
want more ! :-* ;)
-
hahahahaha..this blonde joke is there in arabic..but its funny hahaha....
yyaaaaaaa more :P
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Hello UFO
A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country
road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned
about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in
big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft.
As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with
shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the
tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off.
"Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally
uttered.
"Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?"
"Didn't you see the letters 'UFO' on the side of that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Don't you know what 'UFO' means?!"
The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I've
been working here for five years. Of course I know what 'UFO'
means - it means 'Unleaded Fuel Only'.
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hahahahaha..this blonde joke is there in arabic..but its funny hahaha....
yyaaaaaaa more :P
yea i remember, but it was a sa3eedy!
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hmmm neva knew it wz in arabic anywayz hope when i post more they aint in arabic ! :o
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hahahahaha..this blonde joke is there in arabic..but its funny hahaha....
yyaaaaaaa more :P
yea i remember, but it was a sa3eedy!
haha yaaaaaa!!!
hey omer dude..i never see u..y dont u join our family..i think zainy already did ;D
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yyaa i did join ! :)
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Alligator Shoes
A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana.
She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!"
The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!"
Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator.
Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand.
Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She took aim, killed the creature, and with a great deal of effort hauled it on to the swamp bank.
Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watched in amazement.
Just then the blonde flipped the alligator on its back. Frustrated, she shouts out, "Damn it, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"
hope u havent heard this 1 :P
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Alligator Shoes
A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana.
She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!"
The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!"
Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator.
Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand.
Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She took aim, killed the creature, and with a great deal of effort hauled it on to the swamp bank.
Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watched in amazement.
Just then the blonde flipped the alligator on its back. Frustrated, she shouts out, "Damn it, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"
hope u havent heard this 1 :P
haha good 1
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hahaha..no i havent heard it..its funny hahaha
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thnnnkku
sooo u want more of em ! :P
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yup :P
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Suicide
A blonde hurried into the hospital emergency room late one night with the
tip of her index finger shot off.
"How did this happen?," the emergency room doctor asked her.
"Well, I was trying to commit suicide," the blonde replied.
"What?" sputtered the doctor? "You tried to commit suicide by shooting off
the tip of your finger?"
"No, silly!" the blonde said. "First, I put the gun to my chest, and I
thought, 'I just paid $6,000 for these; I'm not shooting myself in the
chest."
"So then?" asked the doctor.
"Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought, 'I just paid $3,000 to get
my teeth straightened; I'm not shooting myself in the mouth."
"So, then?"
"Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought 'This is going to make a loud
noise, so I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger."
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hahahaha
stupid blondes :P
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yup blondes r quite crazy lool
no offence 2 the blondes on earth !
sooo u want more :)
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hahahahaha
we all love blondes ;D
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Blonde Logic (AKA her weird diary) :P
January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels....."duh".....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!
March - Got excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....box said "2-4 years!"
April - Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!!
May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!
June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!
August - Got locked out of car in rain storm.....car swamped, because top was down.
September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???
October - Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel.
November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days.....instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!
December - Couldn't call 911....."duh".....there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!
What a year!!
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hmmmm u want more blonde jokes
where did the forum disappear :o
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The Circle
A blonde has just gotten a new sports car. She cuts out in front of a semi, and almost causes it to drive over a cliff. The driver furiously motions for her to pull over, and she does. The driver gets out and draws a circle and tells her to stand in it. Then he gets out his knife and cuts up her leather seats. He turns around and sees she's smiling. So he goes to his truck, takes out a baseball bat, and starts busting her windows and beating her car. He looks back to see that she's laughing. He's really mad now, so he takes his knife and slices her tires. He turns around and she's laughing so hard, she's about to fall down. He demands, "What's so funny?" She says, "Every time you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle!"
guyz where r u !!???
ps. pls +rep me im dyin looollll :P
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The Circle
A blonde has just gotten a new sports car. She cuts out in front of a semi, and almost causes it to drive over a cliff. The driver furiously motions for her to pull over, and she does. The driver gets out and draws a circle and tells her to stand in it. Then he gets out his knife and cuts up her leather seats. He turns around and sees she's smiling. So he goes to his truck, takes out a baseball bat, and starts busting her windows and beating her car. He looks back to see that she's laughing. He's really mad now, so he takes his knife and slices her tires. He turns around and she's laughing so hard, she's about to fall down. He demands, "What's so funny?" She says, "Every time you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle!"
guyz where r u !!???
ps. pls +rep me im dyin looollll :P
HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THATS THE BEST ONE BY FAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahaha gotta love em blondes! hahah and stop wasting my time- im trying to study! hahha
-
hahahaha lol Thanks
will add more later on..... ;)
go study :P
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lool
no1 posting ???
-
lool
no1 posting ???
my thread will be dead like urs soon :P
-
naaaaaaaaah........im just tired and busy to post anything......i will be coming soon :D lol
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naaaaaaaaah........im just tired and busy to post anything......i will be coming soon :D lol
oh thx cousin....waitin for ur lame jokes :P
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naaaaaaaaah........im just tired and busy to post anything......i will be coming soon :D lol
oh thx cousin....waitin for ur lame jokes :P
u will get some gd ones for that matter :P hahaha
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naaaaaaaaah........im just tired and busy to post anything......i will be coming soon :D lol
oh thx cousin....waitin for ur lame jokes :P
wow .. he's ur cuzin begad? niceee
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naaaaaaaaah........im just tired and busy to post anything......i will be coming soon :D lol
oh thx cousin....waitin for ur lame jokes :P
wow .. he's ur cuzin begad? niceee
hahahahahaha!!
well we met in real life becuz we were in the same skool/...bas not cousin
hahaha....
u should join the family......
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naaaaaaaaah........im just tired and busy to post anything......i will be coming soon :D lol
oh thx cousin....waitin for ur lame jokes :P
wow .. he's ur cuzin begad? niceee
hahahahahaha!!
well we met in real life becuz we were in the same skool/...bas not cousin
hahaha....
u should join the family......
cool ... it wud b ma pleasure to join the familia ;)
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go to the family thread then!!!
-
where ?? in chit chat?
-
where ?? in chit chat?
yaaa
-
where ?? in chit chat?
YEPZZZ!!
-
k .. i'll go there ;)
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Hey sgvaibhav, i read ur incredibly long joke.
Heres a synopsis
A man in the desert, after being lost for days, finds a magical snake named nate on the middle of a flat stone in the middle of the desert. The snake gives the man 3 wishes, so the man wishes for good health, no sickness, and lots of wisdom. Nate tells the man about the stone where the snake lives. In the middle of the stone is a lever that ends humanity. Nate and the man become good friends, and soon, the man goes back to civilization. He becomes a successful author and drives to visit nate in his RV, but the man loses control in the sand, and he realizes he cant stop, and his RV is heading right for the lever. The only way out is to run over Nate. "Better NATE THAN LEVER," he says and runs over Nate.
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Thanks for the summary dude, +REP ;)
By the way the joke is LAME sgvaibhav :P
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Alligator joke very funny
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Alligator joke very funny
What Page Is It?
-
Alligator joke very funny
What Page Is It?
https://studentforums.biz/index.php/topic,2015.msg48068.html#msg48068
enjoy :)
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Alligator joke very funny
What Page Is It?
https://studentforums.biz/index.php/topic,2015.msg48068.html#msg48068
enjoy :)
hahahahahahahaha :P
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lol, the blonde's diary is really funny
good 1 ;D
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Things Children Have Learned
No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
When your Mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.
If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.
Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic tac.
Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.
School lunches stick to the wall.
You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
The best place to be when you are sad is in Grandma's lap.
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Miracle Toddler Diet! Guaranteed Results
People are always on the lookout for a new diet. The trouble with most diets is that you don't get enough to eat (the starvation diet), you don't get enough variation (the liquid diet) or you go broke (the all-meat diet). Consequently, people tend to cheat on their diets, or quit after 3 days. Well, now there's the new Toddler Miracle Diet.
Over the years you may have noticed that most two year olds are trim. Now the formula to their success is available to all in this new diet. You may want to consult your doctor before embarking on this diet, otherwise, you may be seeing him afterwards. Good Luck !!!
DAY ONE:
Breakfast: One scrambled egg, one piece of toast with grape jelly.
Eat 2 bites of egg, using your fingers; dump the rest on the floor.
Take 1 bite of toast, then smear the jelly over your face and clothes.
Lunch: Four crayons (any color), a handful of potato chips, and a glass of milk (3 sips only, then spill the rest).
Dinner: A dry stick, two pennies and a nickel, 4 sips of flat Sprite.
Bedtime snack: Throw a piece of toast on the kitchen floor.
DAY TWO:
Breakfast: Pick up stale toast from kitchen floor and eat it.
Drink half bottle of vanilla extract or one vial of vegetable dye.
Lunch: Half tube of "Pulsating Pink" lipstick and a handful of Purina Dog Chow (any flavor). One ice cube, if desired.
Afternoon snack: Lick an all-day s**ker until sticky, take outside, drop in dirt. Retrieve and continue slurping until it is clean again.
Then bring inside and drop on rug.
Dinner: A rock or an uncooked bean, which should be thrust up your left nostril. Pour Grape Kool-Aid over mashed potatoes; eat with spoon.
DAY THREE:
Breakfast: Two pancakes with plenty of syrup, eat one with fingers, rub in hair. Glass of milk; drink half, stuff other pancake in glass.
After breakfast, pick up yesterdays s**ker from rug, lick off fuzz, put it on the cushion of best chair.
Lunch: Three matches, peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Spit several bites onto the floor. Pour glass of milk on table and slurp up.
Dinner: Dish of ice cream, handful of potato chips, some red punch.
Try to laugh some punch through your nose, if possible.
FINAL DAY:
Breakfast: A quarter tube of toothpaste (any flavor), bit of soap, an olive. Pour a glass of milk over bowl of cornflakes, add half a cup of sugar. Once cereal is soggy, drink milk and feed cereal to dog.
Lunch: Eat bread crumbs off kitchen floor and dining room carpet. Find that s**ker and finish eating it.
Dinner: A glass of spaghetti and chocolate milk. Leave meatball on plate. Stick of mascara for dessert.
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nice 1 snity
:D :D :D :D :D :D
Thanks guyz u want more ;)
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Labor Pain Machine
A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the father.
He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it. The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before. But as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and kick it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine.
The doctor checked the husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this point they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite well. Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him. The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her husband were ecstatic.
When they got home, the mailman was dead on the porch.
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hahahahahhahahahahahahhhahahahahah :DD::D:D:DD:D
lololololol.........i loved that last one, hahhahhahaha :D
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I like that you laugh on your own jokes :]
But that was a good one though
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ok, i dont get the labour machine joke, the mailman is the father ?
lol, anyways, the others are funny, lol :P keep em comming cousin :)
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ok, i dont get the labour machine joke, the mailman is the father ?
lol, anyways, the others are funny, lol :P keep em comming cousin :)
the lady cheated on her husband.....:D hahahha
and i wont stop :P :D
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I like that you laugh on your own jokes :]
But that was a good one though
they r really funny :D hahahhaa
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A man went to visit his doctor. "Doc, my arm hurts bad. Can you check it out please?" the man pleads.
The doctor rolls up the man's sleeve and suddenly hears the arm talk. "Hello, Doctor't; says the arm. "Could you lend me twenty bucks please? I'm desperate!"
"Aha!'' says the doctor.
''I see the problem. Your arm is broke!"
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I didn't get it ? Am I that stupid? :o
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just read it again and u will get it! :D :P
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Hahahaha okay =D
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i dont get it too ?
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i dont get it too ?
the arm wants 20 bucks.......so the doctor says ur arm is broke........
broke=hurts
broke= bankrupted
COME ON GUYS!!!!! :D :D
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ahh haha okay =P
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ahh haha okay =P
OMG!!!........:P :D
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lol :D
i will add more jokez later on..... :)
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A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely ! >.<
When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.
"Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeeemer!!!", he whined.
"You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!", retorted the officer.
"You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"
"Oh no!", replied the lawyer, finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex???!!!" :P
--------------------------
Two fellas are fishing in a boat under a bridge.
One looks up and sees a funeral procession starting across the bridge.
He stands up, takes off his cap, and bows his head.
The procession crosses the bridge and the man puts on his cap, picks up his rod and reel, and continues fishing.
The other guy says, "That was touching. I didn't know you had it in you."
The first guy responds, "Well, I guess it was the thing to do - after all, I was married to her for 40 years."
-----------------------------
A male frog goes to a psychic. The psychic tells him, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."
The frog becomes excited, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party?"
"No," says the psychic, "in her biology class."
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How many optimists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They're convinced that the power will come back on soon.
--------------------------------
A husband asks: Why do you weep and snuffle over a TV program and the imaginary sadness of people you have never met?
Wife: For the same reason you scream and yell when a man you don’t know makes a touchdown.
--------------------------------
hahahahahaha,
A unit in sex education was about to begin, and each student had to bring in a permission slip in order to take it. A boy handed in his slip and explained to the teacher, “My mom says I can take the course as long as there’s no homework.’
-------------------------------
Little Johnny comes downstairs crying. His mother asked, “What’s the matter now?”
“Dad was hanging pictures, and just hit his thumb with hammer,” said little Johnny through his tears. “That’s not so serious,” soothed his mother. “I know you are upset, but a big boy like you shouldn’t cry at something like that. Why didn’t you just laugh?
“I did!” sobbed Johnny.
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3 more days then...F.R.E.E.D.O.M. :o
By the way dnt stop posting after you finish the exams. We have to keep this thread alive 8)
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3 more days then...F.R.E.E.D.O.M. :o
By the way dnt stop posting after you finish the exams. We have to keep this thread alive 8)
SURE THING! :D
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3 more days then...F.R.E.E.D.O.M. :o
By the way dnt stop posting after you finish the exams. We have to keep this thread alive 8)
OH MY GOD ZEROOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
hey dude HOW R U??!!!!!!!!!!!
didnt see u in a long time!!
good luck for ur exams matie!
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ummmm.. Reishamix just thanked yall .. :-*
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i thought u deactivated ::)
bubeyz ppl gud luk 4 tom
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ummmm.. Reishamix just thanked yall .. :-*
for wat ???
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ummmm.. Reishamix just thanked yall .. :-*
for wat ???
forget about it......she is banned (not by me).
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I'm happy someone did it! I was waiting this moment!!!
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she got banned :o
that was fast lol!!
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I'm happy someone did it! I was waiting this moment!!!
who will approve for cryp's deletion ??
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Perfect Tee Shot
A guy stands over his tee shot for what seems an eternity: looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. Finally his exasperated partner says, "What's taking so long? Hit the damn ball!"
The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."
"Forget it, man," says his partner. "You'll never hit her from here."
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Deadly Golf Trap
Jim and Bob are golfing. Jim slices his ball deep into a wooded ravine and climbs down in search of it.
Jim spots something shiny. As he gets closer, he realizes that the shiny object is an 8-iron in the hands of a skeleton lying near an old golf ball.
Jim calls out to Bob in an agitated voice, "Hey Bob, I got trouble down here."
Bob calls out, "What's the matter Jim?"
Jim shouts back, "Throw me my 7-iron. You can't get out of here with an 8-iron."
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hahahahhahhahahha.......the last one is hilarious :D
loved it :D lol
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The Engineer at the Golf Course
A pastor, a doctor and an engineer wait for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumes, "What's with these guys? We've been waiting for 15 minutes!"
The pastor says, "Hey, here comes the groundskeeper. Let's have a word with him."
"Say, George, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" the doctor asks.
The groundskeeper tells them that the other golfers are a group of blind firefighters who lost their sight saving the clubhouse from a fire and that they come and play for free whenever they want.
The group is silent for a moment.
The pastor says, "That's so sad. I will say a special prayer for them tonight."
The doctor says, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them."
The engineer says, "Why can't these guys play at night?"
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Q: What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A: A golfer goes "whack" and yells, "Damn!", while a skydiver yells, "Damn!" and goes "whack."
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Walks Into a Bar... String Style
A string walks into a bar with a few friends and orders a beer. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve strings here."
The string goes back to his table. He ties himself in a loop and messes up the top of his hair. He walks back up to the bar and orders a beer.
The bartender squints at him and says, "Hey, aren't you a string?"
The string says, "Nope, I'm a frayed knot."
noticed the rhyme? :D lol hahhaa
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Walks Into a Bar... Got Grapes?
A duck walks into a bar and asks, "Got any grapes?"
The bartender, confused, tells the duck no. The duck thanks him and leaves.
The next day, the duck returns and asks, "Got any grapes?"
Again, the bartender tells him, "No -- the bar does not serve grapes, has never served grapes and, furthermore, will never serve grapes." The duck thanks him and leaves.
The next day, the duck returns, but before he can say anything, the bartender yells, "Listen, duck! This is a bar! We do not serve grapes! If you ask for grapes again, I will nail your stupid duck beak to the bar!"
The duck is silent for a moment, and then asks, "Got any nails?"
Confused, the bartender says no.
"Good!" says the duck. "Got any grapes?"
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hahahahhahahahaha......that duck is hilarious :D hahahha
i know its weird or funny for me laughing at my jokes :D lol hahhaa
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Walks Into a Bar... Donkeyboy
Bob and Jim walk into a bar. Bob says, "Hey Donkeyboy, get me a drink." The bartender gets him a drink.
Bob says, "Donkeyboy, get me another drink." The bartender gets him another drink.
Finally, Jim asks the bartender, "Why does he call you Donkeyboy?"
"I don't know. Hehaw-hehaw-he always calls me that."
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Walks Into a Bar... Seeing-Eye Dog
A blind man walks into a bar with his seeing-eye dog. He stands in the center of the bar, takes the dog by the chain, and starts swinging him above his head.
Everyone stops and stares. Upset about the way the animal is being treated, a patron runs up to the blind man and demands, "What the hell are you doing?"
The blind man turns toward the patron and says, "Oh, nothing, just looking around."
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Walks Into a Bar... The Hamster Show
A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he'll give him a free beer for an amazing trick. The bartender agrees. The guy pulls out a hamster that begins dancing and singing.
"That is amazing!" says the bartender and gives him a beer.
"If I show you something else, will you give me another beer?" The bartender agrees.
The guy pulls out a small piano and a frog. The same hamster plays the piano while the frog dances and sings.
The bartender, completely wowed, gives him another beer.
A man in a suit, who's been watching the entire time, offers to buy the frog for a large sum, and the man agrees.
"Are you nuts?" asks the bartender. "You could've made a fortune off that frog."
"Can you keep a secret?" asks the man. "The hamster's a ventriloquist."
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hahahahhahahahaha......that duck is hilarious :D hahahha
i know its weird or funny for me laughing at my jokes :D lol hahhaa
lool. that duck is on drugs !! i can imagine it, i swear !
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hahahahhahahahaha......that duck is hilarious :D hahahha
i know its weird or funny for me laughing at my jokes :D lol hahhaa
lool. that duck is on drugs !! i can imagine it, i swear !
hahahahhahaha........i can imagine it too.....LOL!! :D
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hahahahhahahahaha......that duck is hilarious :D hahahha
i know its weird or funny for me laughing at my jokes :D lol hahhaa
lool. that duck is on drugs !! i can imagine it, i swear !
if i say this u might think i'm on drugs too (lol) , bt that really gave me a hint 4 my new e-mail.
drugged_duck .. lmao. i wanted sth totally random and weird, & it has been killing me that i can't find anything .
eh, if i dont come up with something else. am definitely gonna do it that.
hahahahhahaha........i can imagine it too.....LOL!! :D
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Walks Into a Bar... Vampires
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have a pint of blood."
The second one says, "I'll have one, too."
The third one says, "I'll have a pint of plasma."
The bartender says, "So, that'll be two Bloods and a Blood Lite?"
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well, i g2g now......i will post more jokes later....
Take care, and gd luck!
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well, i g2g now......i will post more jokes later....
Take care, and gd luck!
buh-bye . gd luck 2 u 2 if ur taking physics.
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well, i g2g now......i will post more jokes later....
Take care, and gd luck!
buh-bye . gd luck 2 u 2 if ur taking physics.
i dont take physcis...im gonna post few more jokes (im in the mood) :D lol
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r we the only ones online??
mony (shushou) is online but not posting......
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Cheerleading Tryouts
One day two girls were trying out for the school cheerleading squad. One was a blonde and one was a brunette. After they both had tryouts, they went home to wait until the results were posted. The blonde goes to see if she made it that night. Once she found out she made it she got out her cell phone and called the brunette, but she didn't answer, so the blonde just went back home. The next day the brunette called the blonde to see if she wanted to go with her to look at their scores. The blonde says sure and meets the brunette at the school. The brunette beats the blonde to the school, so she goes ahead and looks at the scores to find out they both made it. When the blonde gets there, she finds her name on the list again. Then she says, ''Yes!! I made it again, I made it last night and I made it again today. I am on a roll!''
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Nouveau Riche Blonde
There was this nouveau riche blond girl, who went to the nearest Mercedes showroom with a pocketful of dollars, and came out with the latest model.
Half an hour later she was back at the showroom, claiming a that the car they sold her was terrible, that she was disappointed a brand-new Mercedes would get a fault in the gearbox after 15 minutes. The management apologized and gave her a new car.
Again, after half an hour she came back. The management offered her a new car, but sent along one of their engineers to see if they could figure out what the problem was. She put in the first gear... sped up... put in second... third... fourth... fifth.... “And now,” she said, “for the rocket,” and threw it in reverse.
hahahhah3hh3ahahahahhahahahhaa...........:D
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Heckle Me Harder
A ventriloquist is sitting onstage at a comedy club. He and his dummy are spurting out really crude blonde jokes, when a blonde lady sitting in the audience stands up.
"I'm so sick of you people who think blondes are stupid. It's because of you that I have had to try harder to prove myself at work and in the community. There are just as many dumb people with red or brown hair. There are just as many smart people with blonde hair."
"Gosh, Miss, I'm terribly sorry. I was just telling jokes, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."
"Shut up! I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to that little jerk on your lap!"
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Q: What did the blonde fill in for Salary Expected out the job application?
A: Yes.
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r we the only ones online??
mony (shushou) is online but not posting......
lool . then post ! u dont take physics.?? neyalak ya 3ame. yeah, i think soo. its like a desert !
hey, did she get mad at me or sth , when i replied bout that thing there about she saying 'he looks ...' .
did i make it appear ino she was wrong bout saying that ?? i swear i was jst trying to expel the tension.
no more, no less.
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r we the only ones online??
mony (shushou) is online but not posting......
lool . then post ! u dont take physics.?? neyalak ya 3ame. yeah, i think soo. its like a desert !
hey, did she get mad at me or sth , when i replied bout that thing there about she saying 'he looks ...' .
did i make it appear ino she was wrong bout saying that ?? i swear i was jst trying to expel the tension.
no more, no less.
dont worry.....im sure she is not mad......:) :D
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What's blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette, blonde?
A fake blonde doing cartwheels!
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Heckle Me Harder
A ventriloquist is sitting onstage at a comedy club. He and his dummy are spurting out really crude blonde jokes, when a blonde lady sitting in the audience stands up.
"I'm so sick of you people who think blondes are stupid. It's because of you that I have had to try harder to prove myself at work and in the community. There are just as many dumb people with red or brown hair. There are just as many smart people with blonde hair."
"Gosh, Miss, I'm terribly sorry. I was just telling jokes, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."
"Shut up! I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to that little jerk on your lap!"
looooooooooooooooooooool.
when i was 2 years younger, i DID think the dummies were the onez talking . especially with jeff dunham if u know'em. until my bro. came, and straightened it out 4 me . gosh, i was stupid ! lol.
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Blonde vs. Ratings System
Q: What happened when the blonde saw the "NC-17: Under 17 Not Admitted" sign at the movie theater?
A: She called 16 friends to come meet her.
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Heckle Me Harder
A ventriloquist is sitting onstage at a comedy club. He and his dummy are spurting out really crude blonde jokes, when a blonde lady sitting in the audience stands up.
"I'm so sick of you people who think blondes are stupid. It's because of you that I have had to try harder to prove myself at work and in the community. There are just as many dumb people with red or brown hair. There are just as many smart people with blonde hair."
"Gosh, Miss, I'm terribly sorry. I was just telling jokes, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."
"Shut up! I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to that little jerk on your lap!"
looooooooooooooooooooool.
when i was 2 years younger, i DID think the dummies were the onez talking . especially with jeff dunham if u know'em. until my bro. came, and straightened it out 4 me . gosh, i was stupid ! lol.
of course i know him :D lol.......i love achmed and peanut :D lol
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hello peeps!!
lol..here sanity i am posting....and E_T i would never be mad from anyone...lol...the whole thing was a joke...peace
nd hey u should join our family :D
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hello peeps!!
lol..here sanity i am posting....and E_T i would never be mad from anyone...lol...the whole thing was a joke...peace
nd hey u should join our family :D
E_T.......my new cousin :D lol
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hello peeps!!
lol..here sanity i am posting....and E_T i would never be mad from anyone...lol...the whole thing was a joke...peace
nd hey u should join our family :D
phewww. thats a relief :) .. yeah, please read sanityz jokes. they're lame :P ..
nd i'm kidding of course . i SWEAR i'm kidding, i wanna annoy u sanity. dunno y.
they're hilarious, i can't stop laughing !
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E_T enti men fain men maser??
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hello peeps!!
lol..here sanity i am posting....and E_T i would never be mad from anyone...lol...the whole thing was a joke...peace
nd hey u should join our family :D
phewww. thats a relief :) .. yeah, please read sanityz jokes. they're lame :P ..
nd i'm kidding of course . i SWEAR i'm kidding, i wanna annoy u sanity. dunno y.
they're hilarious, i can't stop laughing !
:D lol.......feel free :D :P :D
Thanks........inshallah i will get some more later.......
i've been online for 15 hours without a break except for praying and dinner *yawn*
cya l8r ppl! :D
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bye bye :)
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hello peeps!!
lol..here sanity i am posting....and E_T i would never be mad from anyone...lol...the whole thing was a joke...peace
nd hey u should join our family :D
E_T.......my new cousin :D lol
awww. am tearing.lol.of course i wanna join!
i'm honored ! :-*
cairo . madinet nasr n specific !
buh-bye sanity . nighty night !
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wow..thats nice!!!
ana kaman cairo bas maser el gedida :D
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wow..thats nice!!!
ana kaman cairo bas maser el gedida :D
ah, we're kinda close then ! eshta. ;D
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u know....the house is sooooo quite....nd the forum too...lol!!
I LOVE SILENCE!! :D
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u know....the house is sooooo quite....nd the forum too...lol!!
I LOVE SILENCE!! :D
same here ! lool . i wish if my house could stay like that 4ever ! everyonez sleeepin. only thing i can hear is me typing !
but, i love lively forums though ! bs u being here is enuff ;) ;D .
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haha thx ya ro7i!!
where do u live by da way??
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haha thx ya ro7i!!
where do u live by da way??
right now, i'm n ksa n riyadh . can't wait to finish & travel, khalas, can't stand it nymore !
u ??
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eda KSA?!!
wow..me too bas in jeddah...
kolana 3aizeeeeeen nasafer begad...i miss everyone in Egypt :-[
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eda KSA?!!
wow..me too bas in jeddah...
kolana 3aizeeeeeen nasafer begad...i miss everyone in Egypt :-[
SAME HERE !! bas a7sanlek jeddah men il 2lsh il hina bisara7a !
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i heard that jeddah have sooo much freedom compared to Riyadh...
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Jung ner Lbh qbvat evtug abj???
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i heard that jeddah have sooo much freedom compared to Riyadh...
tell me bout it !!
bs dont tell me bout 'Jung ner Lbh qbvat evtug abj???' 3shan shaklaha 7aga msh lateefa ! :)
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i heard that jeddah have sooo much freedom compared to Riyadh...
tell me bout it !!
bs dont tell me bout 'Jung ner Lbh qbvat evtug abj???' 3shan shaklaha 7aga msh lateefa ! :)
use this http://www.rot13.com/index.php
its awesome..write n translate..translate wat i said ;D
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i heard that jeddah have sooo much freedom compared to Riyadh...
tell me bout it !!
bs dont tell me bout 'Jung ner Lbh qbvat evtug abj???' 3shan shaklaha 7aga msh lateefa ! :)
use this http://www.rot13.com/index.php
its awesome..write n translate..translate wat i said ;D
lool. COOL ! whats that language ??
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i dont know..i just knew it today..lol!!
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i dont know..i just knew it today..lol!!
its funny . lol !
da 7ata looks funnier 3an il pakistani language when written !
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hahaha...translate wat i wrote up :P
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good night nd good luck for physics inshallah khair :-*
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hello peeps!!
lol..here sanity i am posting....and E_T i would never be mad from anyone...lol...the whole thing was a joke...peace
nd hey u should join our family :D
E_T.......my new cousin :D lol
awww. am tearing.lol.of course i wanna join!
i'm honored ! :-*
cairo . madinet nasr n specific !
buh-bye sanity . nighty night !
da e7na gran 3ala keda b2a :D lol
3abas el 3a2ad>> ma place :D lol
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United and Barca Fans Car Crash (lmao :P)
A Barca and Man United fan collide in a huge accident on the motorway, just after barca won the UEFA champions legue FINALE. Both cars are a wreck, but both men are unhurt.
"This must be a sign from God that we are meant to be friends" says the Barca fan "I agree" replies the United fan
The Barca fan then returns to the wreckage of his car, and finds a bottle of whiskey he had been saving.
"Look" he says to the united fan, "this must be another sign from God, we should drink this whiskey to celebrate our friendship and survival"
He hands the bottle over to the United fan who takes a large gulp from the bottle before passing it back to the Barca fan, who then puts the top back on & returns the bottle to his car.
"Aren't you having any?" asks the United fan. "No" replied the Barca fan, "I think I’ll wait til the Police get here."
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hahaha lol, nice one dude!! ;D
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Weather vanity (hehe, thats a lame one for Roxy :P)
The Native Americans asked their Chief in autumn, if the winter was going to be cold or not. Not really knowing an answer, the chief replies that the winter was going to be cold and that the members of the village were to collect wood to be prepared.
Being a good leader, he then went to the next phone booth and called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is this winter to be cold?"
The man on the phone responded, "This winter was going to be quite cold indeed."
So the Chief went back to speed up his people to collect even more wood to be prepared. A week later he called the National Weather Service again, "Is it going to be a very cold winter?"
"Yes," the man replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter."
So the Chief goes back to his people and orders them to go and find every scrap of wood they can find. Two weeks later he calls the National Weather Service again: "Are you absolutely sure, that the winter is going to be very cold?"
"Absolutely," the man replies, "the Native Americans are collecting wood like crazy!"
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A woman visited her plastic surgeon who told her about a new procedure called 'The Knob,' where a small knob is placed at the top of the woman's head and could be turned to tighten up her skin and produce the effect of a brand new face-lift.
Of course, the woman wanted 'The Knob.'
Over the course of the years, the woman tightened the knob, and the effects were wonderful, the woman remained young looking and vibrant.
After fifteen years, the woman returned to the surgeon with two problems. 'All these years, everything has been working just fine. I've had to turn the knob many times and I've always loved the results. But now I've developed two annoying problems: First, I have these terrible bags under my eyes and the knob won't get rid of them.'
The doctor looked at her closely and said, 'Those aren't bags, those are your breasts.'
She said, 'Well, I guess there's no point in asking about the goatee.'
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In-flight humour
Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture" and their other announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:
1. From a southwest airlines employee: "there may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only four ways out of this airplane."
2. Pilot: "folks, we have reached our cruising altitude now, so I am going to switch the seat belt sign off. Feel free to move about as you wish, but please stay inside the plane till we land. It's a bit cold outside, and if you walk on the wings it affects the flight pattern."
3. After landing: "thank you for flying delta business express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."
4. As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Washington National, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: "whoa, big fella. Whoa!"
5. After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in Memphis, a flight attendant on a northwest flight announced: "please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted."
6. From a southwest airlines employee: "welcome aboard southwest flight xxx to yyy. To operate your seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt and if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised. In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with two small children, decide now which one you love more."
7. "weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but they'll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and, remember, nobody loves you or your money more than Southwest airlines."
8. "your seat cushions can be used for flotation. In the event of an emergency water landing, please take them with our compliments."
9. "As you exit the plane, please make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. But please do not leave children or spouses."
10. "last one off the plane must clean it."
11. From the pilot during his welcome message: "we are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight."
12. This was overheard on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo, Texas, on a particularly windy and bumpy day. During the final approach, the captain was really having to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the flight attendant came on the pa and announced, "ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo. Please remain in your seats with your seatbelts fastened while the captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate!"
13. Another flight attendant's comment on a less-than-perfect landing: "we ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."
14. An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a, "thanks for flying xyz airline." he said that in light of the bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally, everyone had gotten off except for this little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "sonny, did we land or were we shot down?"
15. After a real crusher of a landing in phoenix, the flight attendant got on the pa and said, "ladies and gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Captain Crash and the crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt up against the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we'll open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal."
16. Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: "we'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of us here at US Airways."
-
I FINISHED MA EXAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D
-
I FINISHED MA EXAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D
lucky you !!!!!!!!!!! ;D
congrats and hopefully u get great results !! ;)
-
I FINISHED MA EXAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D
lucky you !!!!!!!!!!! ;D
congrats and hopefully u get great results !! ;)
thanks :)
u 2....study hard 2 get good results ;)
-
Rules Guys wished Girls knew... ( For all the women out there ;D )
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up, put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if he can find the perfect present!
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are preparedto discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation,and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like ever other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of thetides. Let it be.
11. Shopping is not a sport.
12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
13. You have enough clothes.
14. You have too many shoes.
15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
-
This is a classic :P
4 People 3 Parachutes
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"There was a flight that had only four people on it - the pilot, a young boy scout, an elderly pastor and a scholarly looking gentleman. During the flight the pilot came back and said that they were experiencing engine difficulties and that the plane was going to crash. The good news was that they had parachutes, but the bad news was that there were only three.
Explaining that he had to make a full report of the situation to the authorities he quickly slipped on the parachute and jumped.
The scholarly gentleman stood up next and explained that he had studied at Oxford, Harvard, Yale and other such schools and that he was one of the most intelligent persons in the world. He said that the world needed his wisdom and great learning. So he grabbed a parachute and jumped.
The pastor considered his age and the fact that he had lived a full life and told the boy that he should use the last parachute. The boy scout calmly said, "Don't worry, we'll both be okay." The most intelligent person in the world just put on my backpack before he jumped."
-
Three women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead, were stranded on an island. The brunette looked over the water to the mainland and estimated the distance to be about twenty miles. So, she announced that she was going to try and swim back.
After swimming five miles or so, the brunette began to get tired. However, determined to keep at it, she kept going. Unfortunately, ten miles out, she became exhausted and drowned. The redhead, who was stronger than the brunette had been, decided to give it a try. After getting out about ten miles or so, she too began to get tired.
Just like the brunette, she was determined to keep going; only five miles from the mainland, she too became exhausted and drowned.
Now, the blonde had always been the strongest of the three. And so, after seeing how far the redhead had gotten, she knew that
she had a good chance of making it. The blonde swam away from the island, and was making good time. She passed ten miles easily; however, when she reached fifteen, she began to get tired, too. But she kept going.
Finally, after reaching nineteen miles, with the mainland only a mile away and in sight, the blonde realized that she was simply too tired to go on. So she swam back.
-
ahahahahahahahaha loooooooool
i love u blondes !!! :P
-
ahahahahahahahaha loooooooool
i love u blondes !!! :P
dont we all :D
*cough* except shosho *cough*
-
lol.. are we still going on about blondes..:P
-
Rules Guys wished Girls knew... ( For all the women out there ;D )
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up, put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if he can find the perfect present!
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are preparedto discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation,and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like ever other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of thetides. Let it be.
11. Shopping is not a sport.
12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
13. You have enough clothes.
14. You have too many shoes.
15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
hahahah that just cracked me up..
even though im a girl -.-
-
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH ...!!!
Loooooll... omg thts funnnnnyyy!!!!
:P :P :P
-
Rules Guys wished Girls knew... ( For all the women out there ;D )
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up, put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if he can find the perfect present!
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are preparedto discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation,and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like ever other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of thetides. Let it be.
11. Shopping is not a sport.
12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
13. You have enough clothes.
14. You have too many shoes.
15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
hahahah that just cracked me up..
even though im a girl -.-
lool at 7,8,11, & 15 ( HILARIOUS !)
-
hello peeps!!
lol..here sanity i am posting....and E_T i would never be mad from anyone...lol...the whole thing was a joke...peace
nd hey u should join our family :D
E_T.......my new cousin :D lol
awww. am tearing.lol.of course i wanna join!
i'm honored ! :-*
cairo . madinet nasr n specific !
buh-bye sanity . nighty night !
da e7na gran 3ala keda b2a :D lol
3abas el 3a2ad>> ma place :D lol
yeahh. bas am kinda near the stadium. the distance is walked ! ;D
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hello peeps!!
lol..here sanity i am posting....and E_T i would never be mad from anyone...lol...the whole thing was a joke...peace
nd hey u should join our family :D
E_T.......my new cousin :D lol
awww. am tearing.lol.of course i wanna join!
i'm honored ! :-*
cairo . madinet nasr n specific !
buh-bye sanity . nighty night !
da e7na gran 3ala keda b2a :D lol
3abas el 3a2ad>> ma place :D lol
yeahh. bas am kinda near the stadium. the distance is walked ! ;D
yea :D haha........atmashaha 3ady ya3ni hahahha XD
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hello peeps!!
lol..here sanity i am posting....and E_T i would never be mad from anyone...lol...the whole thing was a joke...peace
nd hey u should join our family :D
E_T.......my new cousin :D lol
awww. am tearing.lol.of course i wanna join!
i'm honored ! :-*
cairo . madinet nasr n specific !
buh-bye sanity . nighty night !
da e7na gran 3ala keda b2a :D lol
3abas el 3a2ad>> ma place :D lol
yeahh. bas am kinda near the stadium. the distance is walked ! ;D
yea :D haha........atmashaha 3ady ya3ni hahahha XD
ah. hehehe.
msh 3ayez te7ot some jokes 2day ?? i read most of the jokes on recent pages. wi am bored now !
-
master ! where u go ??
-
master ! where u go ??
sry im here again :D lol
ok i will post some now :D
-
Walks Into a Bar... Double Vodkas
A guy walks into a bar and says to the barman, "Give me six double vodkas."
The barman says, "Wow, you must have had one hell of a day."
"Yeah, I just found out my oldest son is gay."
The next day, the same guy comes into the bar and asks for six more double vodkas. When the bartender asks what's wrong, the man says, "I just found out that my youngest son is gay, too!"
On the third day, the guy comes into the bar and orders another six double vodkas. The bartender says, "Jesus! Doesn't anybody in your family like women?"
The man downs the first drink and shakes his head, "Yeah, my wife!"
hope not over rated :D
-
What do you get when you divide the circumference of your jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi!
-
Skin Transplant Surgery
A married couple was
in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!
One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice.
She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."
"My darling," he replied, "think nothing of it. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
-
Skin Transplant Surgery
A married couple was
in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!
One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice.
She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."
"My darling," he replied, "think nothing of it. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
loooooooool. bt ewww !
hehe
-
Skin Transplant Surgery
A married couple was
in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!
One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice.
She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."
"My darling," he replied, "think nothing of it. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
loooooooool. bt ewww !
hehe
its ewww alright.......but its, hahahhahahahhaha!!!
-
Identifying wasted time
TO: ALL PERSONNEL
FROM: ACCOUNTING
It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in timesheets that specify large amounts of "Miscellaneous Unproductive Time" (Code 5309). However, we need to know exactly what you are doing during your unproductive time.
Attached below is a sheet specifying a tentative extended job code list based on our observations of employee activities.
The list will allow you to specify with a fair amount of precision what you are doing during your unproductive time. Please begin using this job-code list immediately and let us know about any difficulties you encounter.
Thank you,
Accounting
Attached: Extended Job-Code List
Code and Explanation
5316 Useless Meeting
5317 Obstructing Communications at Meeting
5318 Trying to Sound Knowledgeable While in Meeting
5319 Waiting for Break
5320 Waiting for Lunch
5321 Waiting for End of Day
5322 Vicious Verbal Attacks Directed at Coworker
5323 Vicious Verbal Attacks Directed at Coworker While Coworker is Not Present
5393 Covering for Incompetence of Coworker Friend
5400 Trying to Explain Concept to Coworker Who is Not Interested in Learning
5401 Trying to Explain Concept to Coworker Who is Stupid
5402 Trying to Explain Concept to Coworker Who Hates You
5481 Buying Snack
5482 Eating Snack
5500 Filling Out Timesheet
5501 Inventing Timesheet Entries
5502 Waiting for Something to Happen
5503 Scratching Yourself
5504 Sleeping
5510 Feeling Bored
5511 Feeling Horny
5600 Complaining About Lousy Job
5601 Complaining About Low Pay
5602 Complaining About Long Hours
5603 Complaining About Coworker (See Codes #5322 & #5323)
5604 Complaining About Boss
5605 Complaining About Personal Problems
5640 Miscellaneous Unproductive Complaining
5701 Not Actually Present At Job
5702 Suffering From Eight-Hour Flu
6102 Ordering Out
6103 Waiting for Food Delivery to Arrive
6104 Taking It Easy While Digesting Food
6200 Using Company Resources for Personal Profit
6201 Stealing Company Goods
6202 Making Excuses After Accidentally Destroying Company Goods
6203 Using Company Phone to Make Long-Distance Personal Calls
6204 Using Company Phone to Make Long-Distance Personal Calls to Sell Stolen Company Goods
6205 Hiding from Boss
6206 Gossip
6207 Planning a Social Event (e.g. vacation, wedding, etc.)
6210 Feeling Sorry For Yourself
6211 Updating Resume
6212 Faxing Resume to Another Employer/Headhunter
6213 Out of Office on Interview
6221 Pretending to Work While Boss Is Watching
6222 Pretending to Enjoy Your Job
6223 Pretending You Like Coworker
6224 Pretending You Like Important People When in Reality They are Jerks
6238 Miscellaneous Unproductive Fantasizing
6350 Playing Pranks on the New Guy/Girl
6601 Running your own Business on Company Time (See Code #6603)
6602 Complaining
6603 Writing a Book on Company Time
6611 Staring Into Space
6612 Staring At Computer Screen
6615 Transcendental Meditation
7281 Extended Visit to the Bathroom (at least 10 minutes)
7400 Talking With Divorce Lawyer on Phone
7401 Talking With Plumber on Phone
7402 Talking With Dentist on Phone
7403 Talking With Doctor on Phone
7404 Talking With Masseuse on Phone
7405 Talking With House Painter on Phone
7406 Talking With Personal Therapist on Phone
7419 Talking With Miscellaneous Paid Professional on Phone
7425 Talking With Mistress/Boy-Toy on Phone
7931 Asking Coworker to Aid You in an Illicit Activity
8000 Recreational Drug Use
8001 Non-recreational Drug Use
8002 Liquid Lunch
8100 Reading e-mail
-
Skin Transplant Surgery
A married couple was
in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!
One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice.
She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."
"My darling," he replied, "think nothing of it. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
loooooooool. bt ewww !
hehe
its ewww alright.......but its, hahahhahahahhaha!!!
lool. yeah, but i mean among the skin of all the other parts of the body and among all the people. did they have to chose skin 4rm there ??
at least, the source is trust-worthy . lol.
-
And We Wonder Why Aliens Don't Visit Us...
-
Skin Transplant Surgery
A married couple was
in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!
One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice.
She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."
"My darling," he replied, "think nothing of it. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
loooooooool. bt ewww !
hehe
its ewww alright.......but its, hahahhahahahhaha!!!
lool. yeah, but i mean among the skin of all the other parts of the body and among all the people. did they have to chose skin 4rm there ??
at least, the source is trust-worthy . lol.
if it wasnt trust-worthy, i wouldnt have continued reading the joke :D :P .............ROFL
-
How a Dragon Gets His Dinner...
-
hahahahhahahha........he is really smart! :D
do ppl do everything they're told!!!
-
How to Tell Today Isn't Your Day...
-
want more? :P :D
-
How to Tell Today Isn't Your Day...
oh, poor person. 7araam !
yeah, if u have more ! or maybe i can post some! i dunno .
-
now who did it!! :D lol
-
hahahahahhahahahahhahahahha!!!
-
THATS THE SPIRIT!!!
GO FOR IT!! :D hahahahahhahahahah
-
DO IT!!! :D ahhahahahha
-
THATS THE SPIRIT!!!
GO FOR IT!! :D hahahahahhahahahah
THIS IS ONE HILARIOUS !
-
no emotions anymore :(
:D hahha.....poor computer! :D
-
THATS THE SPIRIT!!!
GO FOR IT!! :D hahahahahhahahahah
THIS IS ONE HILARIOUS !
hahahha........:D :D
-
NEVER!!!
and some1 needs some tooth paste! :P :D
-
MA FAMILY!!!!
THAT MY MOM OVER THERE!!!
hahahahha........:D
-
such a loyal dog! :D
love the golden retriever........they r awesome! :D
-
SEXIST!!!!!
hahhahaa.......well, thats how a "LADY" bug should look like :D hahaha
-
thats very WOMENYYYY!! :P :D:D:D::D
-
SEXIST!!!!!
hahhahaa.......well, thats how a "LADY" bug should look like :D hahaha
ooo. i'm jealous !
-
want more??
i guess thats enough for today :P
hahaha :D
i just hope i get +repped for that! :P :D haha
jk......;)
-
ok, thats the last of him!!
see, water is not that gd for ur health!!
and not every FACT is true! :D :P :P hahhaa
-
wooooooo...many jokes n pic..lol!!
keep the thread alive people :D
-
YOU ASKED FOR IT WOMAN!!!!
u get wt u deserve!!!
-
wooooooo...many jokes n pic..lol!!
keep the thread alive people :D
my partaay needs to be more alive too.........:P :D
hahhaa
-
ok, thats the last of him!!
see, water is not that gd for ur health!!
and not every FACT is true! :D :P :P hahhaa
lool. its weird that that fish has the choice of just hanging out there in the aquarium, but he chose to intelligise ( verb of becoming intelligent ;D ) & read a book. & what happened as a result ? he died !
-
wooooooo...many jokes n pic..lol!!
keep the thread alive people :D
my partaay needs to be more alive too.........:P :D
hahhaa
I owe u then :D
-
GET ME OUT!!!
hahaha
-
ok, thats the last of him!!
see, water is not that gd for ur health!!
and not every FACT is true! :D :P :P hahhaa
lool. its weird that that fish has the choice of just hanging out there in the aquarium, but he chose to intelligise ( verb of becoming intelligent ;D ) & read a book. & what happened as a result ? he died !
u wrote intelligise and u dont know that animals are referred to by " IT " not HE :P
hahahahhahahah.........jk :D
-
wooooooo...many jokes n pic..lol!!
keep the thread alive people :D
my partaay needs to be more alive too.........:P :D
hahhaa
I owe u then :D
u owe me nothing :) ;)
-
POOR DOGIE!!
-
ok, thats the last of him!!
see, water is not that gd for ur health!!
and not every FACT is true! :D :P :P hahhaa
lool. its weird that that fish has the choice of just hanging out there in the aquarium, but he chose to intelligise ( verb of becoming intelligent ;D ) & read a book. & what happened as a result ? he died !
u wrote intelligise and u dont know that animals are referred to by " IT " not HE :P
hahahahhahahah.........jk :D
ROFL.
looooooool. am actually cracking up right now !
i really was wondering be4 i wrote it whether it could be 'he' .
bt then, i said i'm not in an english exam so i could watch my words. so i jst left it 'he' !
-
POOR DOGIE!!
oh, poor wrinkled baby .
a7la ma fi il sora the converse !
-
ok, thats the last of him!!
see, water is not that gd for ur health!!
and not every FACT is true! :D :P :P hahhaa
lool. its weird that that fish has the choice of just hanging out there in the aquarium, but he chose to intelligise ( verb of becoming intelligent ;D ) & read a book. & what happened as a result ? he died !
u wrote intelligise and u dont know that animals are referred to by " IT " not HE :P
hahahahhahahah.........jk :D
ROFL.
looooooool. am actually cracking up right now !
i really was wondering be4 i wrote it whether it could be 'he' .
bt then, i said i'm not in an english exam so i could watch my words. so i jst left it 'he' !
hehehhehehhahahahahhahahahhaha :D lol
hahahha.........:D :P :D
no problem......n3adeha el marady! :P :D
-
POOR DOGIE!!
oh, poor wrinkled baby .
a7la ma fi il sora the converse !
ana 2olt enaha gamda bardo :D lol
-
mmmmmmmmm.........PI!!!
lol
i had few flashbacks when i saw that,ROFL!!!
-
GO GO GO!!!!
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
hahahhaa
-
i will go the other way then :D lol
-
HOT DOG!!!
CUTE!!! :P :D lol
-
looks like i cant stop posting these stuff........:D
now im ahead of roxy with almost a 100.........IRONY!!! :D hahahha
-
HOT DOG!!!
CUTE!!! :P :D lol
YAAAAAAAAA tooooti..very cute :D
-
WHY AM I NOT SURPRISED!!!
they r everywhere :D hahaha
-
hey wat happened today??
didnt u make a party with roxy ???
-
hey wat happened today??
didnt u make a party with roxy ???
no actually.....she had visitors (her family) and told me to proceed with posting.....i made a small party and left, i didnt even attend it......so we agreed on doing our 2000th together!......a HUGE PARTY!!
and it seems like im gonna reach my 1900th in few minutes :D lol
-
NUGH SAID!!
hahahha
-
hey wat happened today??
didnt u make a party with roxy ???
no actually.....she had visitors (her family) and told me to proceed with posting.....i made a small party and left, i didnt even attend it......so we agreed on doing our 2000th together!......a HUGE PARTY!!
and it seems like im gonna reach my 1900th in few minutes :D lol
ooooh ok....congrats in advance :P
-
MAKE UP UR MIND!!!
hahahha
-
GO GO GO!!!!
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
hahahhaa
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
loooooooooooooooooooooool. ta5yal !!
i want to get on one now. lol. maleesh da3wa.
-
hey wat happened today??
didnt u make a party with roxy ???
no actually.....she had visitors (her family) and told me to proceed with posting.....i made a small party and left, i didnt even attend it......so we agreed on doing our 2000th together!......a HUGE PARTY!!
and it seems like im gonna reach my 1900th in few minutes :D lol
ooooh ok....congrats in advance :P
Thanks :D lol
-
GO GO GO!!!!
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
hahahhaa
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
loooooooooooooooooooooool. ta5yal !!
i want to get on one now. lol. maleesh da3wa.
me first........see u in theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
that was fast :D hahhahahha
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
-
is he over yet!!!
hahahha
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
-
i will go the other way then :D lol
u sure u wanna try the other way ?? ;D
dont u wanna c what kinda of pple r there ??
i mean pple keep on saying 'GO TO HELL' all the time, curiosity is getting to me!
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
-
i will go the other way then :D lol
u sure u wanna try the other way ?? ;D
dont u wanna c what kinda of pple r there ??
i mean pple keep on saying 'GO TO HELL' all the time, curiosity is getting to me!
:D hahhaa.......curiosity??..........no thanks, i prefer seeing them from up there! :D :P
-
DONT TRY THIS AT HOME!! :P :D
hahahha
-
The Perfect Solution For New Drivers?
-
oh GOD!!
im very tired......i've seen over 380 pictures till now and got u these...........im very tired!
wanna continue later guys??
-
what u leaving too ?? r u kidding me inta kaman ??
-
what u leaving too ?? r u kidding me inta kaman ??
hahaha..ur askin the same question ...hahaha
-
yeah. u guys C'MMON !
a ?? mabtsharoosh ??
-
yeah. u guys C'MMON !
a ?? mabtsharoosh ??
ill stay wid u..dont worry :D
-
yeah. u guys C'MMON !
a ?? mabtsharoosh ??
bashar, we momkin afdal sa7y 1 week odam (done it before) lol...........bs cuz we r in the middle of exams and no many ppl online........i get tired of being awake :D lol
sry for that.........we will continue later :)
-
hahahahhahahha...
I MADE A POINT!!
hahah :P :D
-
tell u wt........im gonna stay for a while! :D
just for u and mony to not be alone ;)
-
hahahahhahahha...
I MADE A POINT!!
hahah :P :D
hahhahahaha...LAIR!!
-
:D hahaha
-
yay. u guys rock !
-
hahahahhahahha...
I MADE A POINT!!
hahah :P :D
hahhahahaha...LAIR!!
LIAR U MEAN :P :D hahahha
-
yay. u guys rock !
:D.......Thanks :D lol
-
hahahahhahahha...
I MADE A POINT!!
hahah :P :D
hahhahahaha...LAIR!!
LIAR U MEAN :P :D hahahha
hey hey ..dont make fun of my spelling mistakes...wait ill get u one that u did :P
-
hahahahhahahha...
I MADE A POINT!!
hahah :P :D
loooooooooool.
thats not funny though !
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
A LOT u mean..not alot :P
-
hahahhaa.......they missed PEPSI! :D lol
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
A LOT u mean..not alot :P
thats not a mistake!!........they r pronounced the same
not like..........LAIR ( hide our or 3areen for lions) and LIAR!!! :P :D hahhaha
TRY AGAIN!!
-
GFs VS WIVES!!!
-
watever Sanity..i am the best in English in my school alhamdolilah :P :P :P :P
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
A LOT u mean..not alot :P
thats not a mistake!!........they r pronounced the same
not like..........LAIR ( hide our or 3areen for lions) and LIAR!!! :P :D hahhaha
TRY AGAIN!!
lool. am starting to think hez a nerd !!
imma help u shoshou !
-
NICE ONE DUDE!!!
i got 3 left for my 1900th lol hahhahah
-
I ACTUALLY SMILED BACK!!
hahahahhahahahhahahaha..............:D
-
hahaha....yes help me E_T.....u know he seems in skool really really that kind of innocent guy..bas howa mostafez in real life :P
-
i missed my 1800th post.. ;D
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
A LOT u mean..not alot :P
thats not a mistake!!........they r pronounced the same
not like..........LAIR ( hide our or 3areen for lions) and LIAR!!! :P :D hahhaha
TRY AGAIN!!
lool. am starting to think hez a nerd !!
imma help u shoshou !
i aint no nerd! :P :D hahahhaha
KEEP TRYING!!! :P :D lol
-
I ACTUALLY SMILED BACK!!
hahahahhahahahhahahaha..............:D
LOL.
yeah, bas not by animalz smiles . UR WEIRD. :P
-
I ACTUALLY SMILED BACK!!
hahahahhahahahhahahaha..............:D
LOL.
yeah, bas not by animalz smiles . UR WEIRD. :P
hahahahhaha........its wsnt actually a smile, it was some kinda muted laugh ya know :D lol hahahha
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
A LOT u mean..not alot :P
thats not a mistake!!........they r pronounced the same
not like..........LAIR ( hide our or 3areen for lions) and LIAR!!! :P :D hahhaha
TRY AGAIN!!
lool. am starting to think hez a nerd !!
imma help u shoshou !
i aint no nerd! :P :D hahahhaha
KEEP TRYING!!! :P :D lol
wel, if ur not a nerd. PROVE IT ! :P
-
hahahahhaha..........:D
-
wohooooooo go go E_T....prove it sanity :P
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
A LOT u mean..not alot :P
thats not a mistake!!........they r pronounced the same
not like..........LAIR ( hide our or 3areen for lions) and LIAR!!! :P :D hahhaha
TRY AGAIN!!
lool. am starting to think hez a nerd !!
imma help u shoshou !
i aint no nerd! :P :D hahahhaha
KEEP TRYING!!! :P :D lol
wel, if ur not a nerd. PROVE IT ! :P
u want me to make a mistake to prove u wrong :P :D
there is a difference between being smart and being a nerd.......:P :D lol
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
A LOT u mean..not alot :P
thats not a mistake!!........they r pronounced the same
not like..........LAIR ( hide our or 3areen for lions) and LIAR!!! :P :D hahhaha
TRY AGAIN!!
lool. am starting to think hez a nerd !!
imma help u shoshou !
i aint no nerd! :P :D hahahhaha
KEEP TRYING!!! :P :D lol
wel, if ur not a nerd. PROVE IT ! :P
u want me to make a mistake to prove u wrong :P :D
there is a difference between being smart and being a nerd.......:P :D lol
& there is no diff. between a nerd (who picks on pplz mistakes) & u !! :P
(mony, did that make sense ?? )
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
A LOT u mean..not alot :P
thats not a mistake!!........they r pronounced the same
not like..........LAIR ( hide our or 3areen for lions) and LIAR!!! :P :D hahhaha
TRY AGAIN!!
lool. am starting to think hez a nerd !!
imma help u shoshou !
i aint no nerd! :P :D hahahhaha
KEEP TRYING!!! :P :D lol
wel, if ur not a nerd. PROVE IT ! :P
u want me to make a mistake to prove u wrong :P :D
there is a difference between being smart and being a nerd.......:P :D lol
& there is no diff. between a nerd (who picks on pplz mistakes) & u !! :P
(mony, did that make sense ?? )
a real nerd doesn't have the guts to face ppl and correct their mistakes......:P :D hahahha
-
hahaha..go go go E_T!!!!!!!!!!
THAT MADE SENSE!! WOW MY TWIN IS BACKING ME UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
no ur wrong sanity :P
-
DREAM ON!!! LOL
-
mony........i had the same # of posts as u......look now!! :P :D
hahaha :D lol
that is becuz i was out the whole day today..but wait till.....................then ill beat u :P :P :P
hahhahahaha........cant wait for that......and By the way, i havent been online alot today!! :D......i was out for like 6 hours!! :P :D
A LOT u mean..not alot :P
thats not a mistake!!........they r pronounced the same
not like..........LAIR ( hide our or 3areen for lions) and LIAR!!! :P :D hahhaha
TRY AGAIN!!
lool. am starting to think hez a nerd !!
imma help u shoshou !
i aint no nerd! :P :D hahahhaha
KEEP TRYING!!! :P :D lol
wel, if ur not a nerd. PROVE IT ! :P
u want me to make a mistake to prove u wrong :P :D
there is a difference between being smart and being a nerd.......:P :D lol
& there is no diff. between a nerd (who picks on pplz mistakes) & u !! :P
(mony, did that make sense ?? )
a real nerd doesn't have the guts to face ppl and correct their mistakes......:P :D hahahha
lool. k, now ur getting confused between confidence and nerdism ! ??? ???
:P :P
-
hahaha..go go go E_T!!!!!!!!!!
THAT MADE SENSE!! WOW MY TWIN IS BACKING ME UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
no ur wrong sanity :P
no im not wrong.....have u ever seen a nerd facing others ??
:P :D
-
hahaha..go go go E_T!!!!!!!!!!
THAT MADE SENSE!! WOW MY TWIN IS BACKING ME UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
no ur wrong sanity :P
lool.
ana 7asa ini bat5ane2 m3 a 5 yr old ( :P sanity ) !
-
WHAT ARE WE FIGHTING ABOUT ANYWAYZZ!!!! :P :D :P
-
hahaha..go go go E_T!!!!!!!!!!
THAT MADE SENSE!! WOW MY TWIN IS BACKING ME UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
no ur wrong sanity :P
lool.
ana 7asa ini bat5ane2 m3 a 5 yr old ( :P sanity ) !
its weird cuz i got the same feeling :P :D hahahaha
-
hahaha..go go go E_T!!!!!!!!!!
THAT MADE SENSE!! WOW MY TWIN IS BACKING ME UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
no ur wrong sanity :P
no im not wrong.....have u ever seen a nerd facing others ??
:P :D
7abibe, my school is full of them.
now i think ur going dowwwn ! admit it. c'mmon !
-
THAT NAME IS CURSED!!!
-
ohh sry guys........i really g2g now, im very sorry
cya l8r, bye!!!
-
Bye Sanity!!
Good night cousin...bas ur a bad person 3ahsan u didnt wait for fajir :P
-
hahaha..go go go E_T!!!!!!!!!!
THAT MADE SENSE!! WOW MY TWIN IS BACKING ME UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
no ur wrong sanity :P
lool.
ana 7asa ini bat5ane2 m3 a 5 yr old ( :P sanity ) !
its weird cuz i got the same feeling :P :D hahahaha
u gt a feeling that ur a 5 yr old too fighting wit me??
loool. i can't stop this or laughing !
some1 is backing up ! ya 7araam.
lool. buh-bye sanity. tht was fun !
tty soon !
-
so wats up E_T??!!!!!! ;D
do u have any brothers or sisters in real life?
-
so wats up E_T??!!!!!! ;D
do u have any brothers or sisters in real life?
yeah, i do. 3 broz. wi a lil cuty sis.
u ??
-
so wats up E_T??!!!!!! ;D
do u have any brothers or sisters in real life?
yeah, i do. 3 broz. wi a lil cuty sis.
u ??
one older sister 19 years old..nd a younger brother 8 years old... :D
so ur not the eldest then?
-
so wats up E_T??!!!!!! ;D
do u have any brothers or sisters in real life?
yeah, i do. 3 broz. wi a lil cuty sis.
u ??
one older sister 19 years old..nd a younger brother 8 years old... :D
so ur not the eldest then?
hehehe. i wish ! ;D
so,what brought u to jeddah??
-
i have been in jeddah since 14 years or sumthin..lol..but then i visit Egypt yearly....u?
-
i have been in jeddah since 14 years or sumthin..lol..but then i visit Egypt yearly....u?
yeah,i've been here since i was a kid too. :S
bt, again i do travel to egypt every vacation .
ah,how old r u sa7ee7??
-
i have been in jeddah since 14 years or sumthin..lol..but then i visit Egypt yearly....u?
yeah,i've been here since i was a kid too. :S
bt, again i do travel to egypt every vacation .
ah,how old r u sa7ee7??
ana my date of birth is 7/6/1993...u?
-
i have been in jeddah since 14 years or sumthin..lol..but then i visit Egypt yearly....u?
yeah,i've been here since i was a kid too. :S
bt, again i do travel to egypt every vacation .
ah,how old r u sa7ee7??
ana my date of birth is 7/6/1993...u?
umm, im 15. hab2a 16 isA soon. ;D
-
so tell me batsaifi fain fi maser?? like alex wala matroo7??
-
i have been in jeddah since 14 years or sumthin..lol..but then i visit Egypt yearly....u?
yeah,i've been here since i was a kid too. :S
bt, again i do travel to egypt every vacation .
ah,how old r u sa7ee7??
ana my date of birth is 7/6/1993...u?
umm, im 15. hab2a 16 isA soon. ;D
so u gt any close friends who stay there in egypt ??
-
so tell me batsaifi fain fi maser?? like alex wala matroo7??
lol..here is a question u missed :P
-
so tell me batsaifi fain fi maser?? like alex wala matroo7??
lol..here is a question u missed :P
oh, lool.
hmm, nt really smewhere specific.
always depends on the situation & my mood ! like last yr, i really didn't spend my vacation enjoying it to the blast, xcept just randomly hanging out with my cousins ! u know ?? u ?? what r u gonna do this summer ?? & to where??
-
heloooo! nemty wala a ??
lol.
-
I have many many cousins..lol...all of them r boys except 2 or sumthin :(
but then i am the youngest so we all hang out together..we go to matroo7 nd alex always...bas once we went to gharda2a it was awesome!!
i fight with them alawys..haha..i like one of them so we always end up with a fight every year ;D
-
heloooo! nemty wala a ??
lol.
i was postin in the who u prefer thread!! i wrote great stuff over there..lol :P
-
heloooo! nemty wala a ??
lol.
i was postin in the who u prefer thread!! i wrote great stuff over there..lol :P
lool. bt, i like the way u posted over there.
u said everything most girls wanted to say. BRAVO !
-
heloooo! nemty wala a ??
lol.
i was postin in the who u prefer thread!! i wrote great stuff over there..lol :P
lool. bt, i like the way u posted over there.
u said everything most girls wanted to say. BRAVO !
I am kind of a debtor ;D
u know in this thread there was like 5 boys nd i was the only girl..they where all against me..n i won them alone!! walhi they had a bigggggg slap in their face....GIRLS R THE BEST!! :D :D
-
heloooo! nemty wala a ??
lol.
i was postin in the who u prefer thread!! i wrote great stuff over there..lol :P
lool. bt, i like the way u posted over there.
u said everything most girls wanted to say. BRAVO !
I am kind of a debtor ;D
u know in this thread there was like 5 boys nd i was the only girl..they where all against me..n i won them alone!! walhi they had a bigggggg slap in their face....GIRLS R THE BEST!! :D :D
loooooool. YOU GO GIRL !
hehe. next time, if nyting like this happens, call on me !
i always win too . lol, n any fight ! even with my friends and family. & i love it !
-
mahoo e7na Twins 3ashan keda we always win!! hahahaha!! :D :D :D
-
mahoo e7na Twins 3ashan keda we always win!! hahahaha!! :D :D :D
lool. akeeeeeed.
wi 7a ye2dar ye2ool 3'eir keda ?? !
:-* :-* :-*
-
eeh da ento konto betel3abo wala eeh :o
-
eeh da ento konto betel3abo wala eeh :o
HAHAHA..
-
eeh da ento konto betel3abo wala eeh :o
HAHAHA..
2ow3ee te2oleely kaman u had a rep party....7a3'talek feeha ;D :P
-
eeh da ento konto betel3abo wala eeh :o
HAHAHA..
2ow3ee te2oleely kaman u had a rep party....7a3'talek feeha ;D :P
HAHAHAHA..la2 i was out aslan my brother had end of year party...fa nuthin happened!! dont worry :D
-
eeh da ento konto betel3abo wala eeh :o
HAHAHA..
2ow3ee te2oleely kaman u had a rep party....7a3'talek feeha ;D :P
HAHAHAHA..la2 i was out aslan my brother had end of year party...fa nuthin happened!! dont worry :D
el7 keda anam w ana dameery merta7 eny maday3tesh wa2tokom bet2ooolo ya reet eamy kanet henna ;D :P
-
hahaha..khoshi khoshi nami...haha..ya magnona... :P
-
hahaha..khoshi khoshi nami...haha..ya magnona... :P
HHAHAHHAAHHA....smthng new plz ;D :P
-
hahaha..khoshi khoshi nami...haha..ya magnona... :P
HHAHAHHAAHHA....smthng new plz ;D :P
ba2olik ya benti el shrouq haitl3 we ana lessa masaletshi hahaha..bye :-*
-
hahaha..khoshi khoshi nami...haha..ya magnona... :P
HHAHAHHAAHHA....smthng new plz ;D :P
ba2olik ya benti el shrouq haitl3 we ana lessa masaletshi hahaha..bye :-*
yalla bye w ana kamn :-* :-*
-
You're so fat, that when you jumped into the ocean, the whales started singing "We are Family" ..
lol. okay.. that wasnt aimed a anyone.... Im just feeling my lame old self .. ;D
-
You're so fat, that when you jumped into the ocean, the whales started singing "We are Family" ..
lol. okay.. that wasnt aimed a anyone.... Im just feeling my lame old self .. ;D
loool. i can imagine them singing.
dunno y i always imagine animals doing funy stuff.
-
seems like no one noticed the pix i posted..........:P :D hahahha
3'are mony and ET tab3an :P :D hahahahahha
-
seems like no one noticed the pix i posted..........:P :D hahahha
3'are mony and ET tab3an :P :D hahahahahha
which page?
-
seems like no one noticed the pix i posted..........:P :D hahahha
3'are mony and ET tab3an :P :D hahahahahha
which page?
MA POINT!!!!!
just get back few pages and u will find them there!! :D lol
-
start from page 182 ! :D lol
-
you posted a pic ...:P :P :P
-
any great jokes i missed?
-
I've got one!!!! ;D
There was once a blonde named Stupid Sam. He had these huge 70's headphones and for some reason attached them to a shuffle.
One day he finally figured out taking a hair cut wouldn't hurt him, but when he went to the barber, he warned him "Don't remove my headphones, or I die!"
So the barber went on, but couldn't help it....
the wire is too freakin huge! so he just threw off the headphones. Then suddenly.......
he lied on the floor unconsious
"Oh my God, he wasn't kidding!!" said the barber
He then thought what he was listening to all this time, so he held up the speakers and heared "Breath in, breath out, breath in...."
-
A'Kareem!
U finally found ur way in here!
nice joke By the way
-
kareem??
lol..sorry omer..i didnt welcome u back brother..started a fight 3alatool..hahaha
welcome back :D
-
looool...!
great welcome...:P
-
lol
its ok, that is exactly what i expect from a...... GIRL :P (kidding)
anyways, thank you
oh, and a'kareem, head off to the argument, i need some guys to help me out
-
U BETTER BE KIDDEN OMER :P
-
MAYBE I AM
MAYBE I AIN'T
*super-hyper-evil-smile*
-
MAYBE I AM
MAYBE I AIN'T
*super-hyper-evil-smile*
ok yalla off to bed little brother :P
goooooood night :D
-
you posted a pic ...:P :P :P
not a pic.......i posted many jokes back there and some funny pics......but looks like no one is interested :(
:P :D :P
-
you posted a pic ...:P :P :P
not a pic.......i posted many jokes back there and some funny pics......but looks like no one is interested :(
:P :D :P
go to da who do u prefer thread
omer needs u
and yes i loved ur jokes
be there tomz
there is a fight
and dont start b4 me!!!
-
you posted a pic ...:P :P :P
not a pic.......i posted many jokes back there and some funny pics......but looks like no one is interested :(
:P :D :P
go to da who do u prefer thread
omer needs u
and yes i loved ur jokes
be there tomz
there is a fight
and dont start b4 me!!!
hahahha.......i fought with the girls 3 times!!! :D lol
-
...and lost :P
-
...and lost :P
i didnt lose!!.......non of the 3 fights actually came to an end :P :d lol
-
::)
-
::)
:o
-
KEEP ON TRYING!!! lol
-
Hahaha *Idiot*
-
SUCH A DELICATE WORK!!
hahhahahaha
-
I KNOW I DONT SEE ANY!!! ;D :D
hahahhaha
-
hahahhahahahha :D lol
-
WORK WORK WORK!!!
hahahhahaa
-
The last one is us "IGCSE students" =P
-
cleaning FREAK!! :D lol
-
The last one is us "IGCSE students" =P
IT practicing :D hahahhahaha
-
11 more posts left mate ..
-
ladies are DANGEROUS!!!!
-
11 more posts left mate ..
im coming dont worry :D lol
-
FRESH AND NEW!!!
hahhaa
-
I KNOW WHICH ONE!!!!
did u know! :P :D hahhahaahha
-
PICK ME UP AT 8 !
hahahahha
-
they told me its LEFT!
hahahahhahhahahahahhaha........
-
THAT GUY IS BLOND FROM THE INSIDE!!
HAHAHHAHA
-
THAT GUY IS BLOND FROM THE INSIDE!!
HAHAHHAHA
omg. i just looooooooove this joke !
its hilarious ! i read it be4, bt it was a woman,gd to c a change ! lol.
-
THAT GUY IS BLOND FROM THE INSIDE!!
HAHAHHAHA
omg. i just looooooooove this joke !
its hilarious ! i read it be4, bt it was a woman,gd to c a change ! lol.
i posted that joke before but it was about blonds :d hahahha
lol.......its gd to change from time to time :D :P
-
hahhahaahhaa.........he is just FINE!
hahaha lol
-
WHAT A DISCOVERY!!
HAHHAHA
-
THAT EXPLAINS TOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!
rofl!!!
-
THE REAPER'S GUIDE!!!
-
hahhahahahahaha,,,,,,,,,D: lol
y doesnt any1 comment!!.......am i the only one here?
-
THAT EXPLAINS TOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!
rofl!!!
looooool. cute kid !
-
hahhahahahahaha,,,,,,,,,D: lol
y doesnt any1 comment!!.......am i the only one here?
ya 7araaam! the leg only ??
hey hey, i'm here ! thats an insult !
-
hahhahahahahaha,,,,,,,,,D: lol
y doesnt any1 comment!!.......am i the only one here?
ya 7araaam! the leg only ??
hey hey, i'm here ! thats an insult !
i take it back :D lol
-
hahhahahahahaha,,,,,,,,,D: lol
y doesnt any1 comment!!.......am i the only one here?
ya 7araaam! the leg only ??
hey hey, i'm here ! thats an insult !
i take it back :D lol
YEAH,U SHOULD >:( >:( !!
NOW POST MORE ;D ;D ;D !
-
hahhahahahahaha,,,,,,,,,D: lol
y doesnt any1 comment!!.......am i the only one here?
ya 7araaam! the leg only ??
hey hey, i'm here ! thats an insult !
i take it back :D lol
YEAH,U SHOULD >:( >:( !!
NOW POST MORE ;D ;D ;D !
go to PARTAAY thread..........the TWINS party is on!!
-
lol.looks like u deleted a post
sorry mate ..
-
hey why didnt u post more
u know i always cum late due to my studying
sorry im late pal :'(
-
hey guys.......im going to the exam now :D
hopefully (inshallah) when i get back, i will post funny pix again and jokes.........so wait for it ;) :D
-
hey guys.......im going to the exam now :D
hopefully (inshallah) when i get back, i will post funny pix again and jokes.........so wait for it ;) :D
Good luck!! im going in a minute!
-
yeah ! GOOD LUCK U GUYS !
-
FREE DOM!
FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE DOM!
FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE DOM!
FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE DOM!
-
W0000000000T!!!!
Heres a joke.
An old man decided his old wife was getting hard of hearing. So he called her doctor to make an appointment to have her hearing checked. The doctor said he could see her in two weeks, and meanwhile there's a simple, informal test the husband could do to give the doctor some idea of the dimensions of the problem.
"Here's what you do. Start about 40 feet away from her, and speak in a normal onversational tone and see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response."
So that evening she's in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he's in the living room, and he says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens."
"Honey, what's for supper?"
No response.
So he moves to the other end of the room, about 30 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?"
No response.
So he moves into the dining room, about 20 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?"
No response.
On to the kitchen door, only 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?".
No response.
So he walks right up behind her. "Honey, what's for supper?"
"For the fifth time, CHICKEN!"
-
W0000000000T!!!!
Heres a joke.
An old man decided his old wife was getting hard of hearing. So he called her doctor to make an appointment to have her hearing checked. The doctor said he could see her in two weeks, and meanwhile there's a simple, informal test the husband could do to give the doctor some idea of the dimensions of the problem.
"Here's what you do. Start about 40 feet away from her, and speak in a normal onversational tone and see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response."
So that evening she's in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he's in the living room, and he says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens."
"Honey, what's for supper?"
No response.
So he moves to the other end of the room, about 30 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?"
No response.
So he moves into the dining room, about 20 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?"
No response.
On to the kitchen door, only 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?".
No response.
So he walks right up behind her. "Honey, what's for supper?"
"For the fifth time, CHICKEN!"
looooool. that was unexpected !
loved it !
-
it seems i posted in all the threads EXCEPT MY THREAD!!LOL!!
CONGRATSSSSS PEOPLE!!
HAVE A NICE ND A HAPPY HOLIDAY INHSLLAH!! :-*
I LOVE U ALL AND I AM GLAD THAT WE R DONE :D (although i still have physics to take in Nov :() lol..but 90% over :D :D :D
-
lol..nd now for the votes for my nickname..i did it both..becuz it seems they r equal..lol!! :D
-
lol..nd now for the votes for my nickname..i did it both..becuz it seems they r equal..lol!! :D
hmmmmm............2 IN ONE!!! :P :D
-
lol..nd now for the votes for my nickname..i did it both..becuz it seems they r equal..lol!! :D
hmmmmm............2 IN ONE!!! :P :D
hahaha..nice idea right??! :P
hey wat do u think of the display pic??!! do i change it :-\
-
Heeeeyyy guyz !!!!
have 2 be the happiest person alive ryt now ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
congratz 2every whoz done as well wid da ig'z as well :) :) :) :)
(even though i will do e.m n physics in nov. :( )
soo howz every1 feeling..... ur mood lol
nd i will be posting jokes later on
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
-
heyyyyyyyyyyy sister!!!
me too gona take physics in nov isa ;D
hey u like my display pic?? shall i change it??
-
naawww dnt change it looks AweSom3 :D :D :D :D :D
keep it 4 a while
nd itz nyc 2 har ur takin in nov as mee lol
-
ny guyz here? can we start the fight early?
-
ny guyz here? can we start the fight early?
huh !!?????? wt fight ??? ??? ??? :-\ :-\ :-\
-
ny guyz here? can we start the fight early?
oh my god woteverr.. hahaha no even hi..bad boy...
ok zainy ill change it..but check this one ;D
-
There's gonna be a grand fight in the thread "Who would you prefer"..........
hi shosh, mony, shoushou, monica, sherry. and zainy!
-
........nd suddenly ur a guy mony......... :P :P
-
oohhhkkk
nd mony to teelll u da truth..... this pic is bettah than da oder 1 ;) ( but i still lyked the other 1 too)
-
shosh u change ur name, and added a pic !! :D
-
She's getting ready for her 2000th post cereMONY!! :P :P :P
-
haha like 4 ppl reached their 2000th post this week lol
-
yup......
-
hahahaha...sooo i have more pix do i show them to u?? ;D ;D ;D
hahahaha..nd woteverr i am the starter of the fight..so i am the boss :P :P but then i have to wait for the girls :P :P :P
-
heyy mony do u like ma dp ???
-
heyy mony do u like ma dp ???
haha NO..it looks......haha..change it..like sumthin cool ;)
-
heyy mony do u like ma dp ???
cute lil' bunny wabbit!! ;D ;D
-
Thanks woteverr... i luv rabbits <3 :)
nd how bout now mony !!! ::)
-
Thanks woteverr... i luv rabbits <3 :)
nd how bout now mony !!! ::)
haha CUTE!! but dont u wanna be Cool.. :P
i can give u ones n u choose from if u want ;D
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rrryyyyttt cool ::) ::) i'll keep that in mind bytheway i think its cute loll :)
wt do u have in mind ? :D
-
to satisfy mony, you JUST(for roxy) have to go anime,...... preferably long funky hair nd half the mouth visible, other hidden......
yup, dats it!! ;D ;D ;D
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to satisfy mony, you JUST(for roxy) have to go anime,...... preferably long funky hair nd half the mouth visible, other hidden......
yup, dats it!! ;D ;D ;D
hahahahahahahaaha loolll u know a lot abt her it seems !!! :D :D :D :D :P
but i'll wait 4 mony !! soo she doesnt get MAD :P :P :P
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http://www.testriffic.com/resultfiles/27438MinitokyoAnimeWallpapersMemoriesOff.jpg
http://motokochan.unblog.fr/files/2008/03/nuitvipblogcom542529manga64.jpg
lol..i love anime woteverr :P :P and i am cool thats y :P :P :P
check those out zainy..i have more if u want ;D ;D ;D
-
lol........methinks u wants to be an anime figure ;D ;D :D :D
@zainy:
mony never gets mad...........cept wen the capslock bug bites her!! ;) ;)
-
To see a really funny joke, scroll down!
To see a really funny joke, scroll up!
Sorry, im just really happy IGs are over. :D
2 MONTHS AND 10 DAYS HOLIDAYS!!!! WOOOOHOOOO!!!! but i have nothing to do. all my friends have school now :-\
-
wotever.......so exams hav devoured u now!!!!!
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http://www.testriffic.com/resultfiles/27438MinitokyoAnimeWallpapersMemoriesOff.jpg
http://motokochan.unblog.fr/files/2008/03/nuitvipblogcom542529manga64.jpg
lol..i love anime woteverr :P :P and i am cool thats y :P :P :P
check those out zainy..i have more if u want ;D ;D ;D
kkk ur cool 8) :P i ll but the pic i like k jus wait 4 it :) ;)
nd yess it is quite annoyin wid the capslock bite llloollll :P ::)
-
guys.hows my pic...its cumin to get u!!!! :P
-
lol mr boombastic ur pic is kinda weird 2 me lol
nd mony luv ma pic now :P :P :P :P (thnk u ) :P :P :-* :-* :-* :-*
-
wooow..nice pic zainy..i wonder from where did u get it :P :P :P
haha..ya woteverr..i never get mad..even when my caps lock r on...actually it means i am excited lol!!
-
ya i gt the pic frm 1 of my rellyy gd friend
n nyc to know u dnt get mad :)
:P luv u :-*
-
love u too sister!! :-* :-*
ok check this one i am puttin now ;D
-
hahahaaha lol i lyked the old pic bettah !
-
lol..i cropped it..it should be better now...anyway gtg dressed up..my friend is waitn..ill search for more when i come back isa!!
love u bye :-*
-
kk bye luv u 2 :-*
n the pic looks nyc its tht i liked da oder 1 bettah so ur wish...
-
thats soo caty :D lol
-
thats the way to do it :D lol
-
:D lol...........
I CAN SEE THE LIGHT!! :D :P
-
hey! how about funny insults and comebacks u could use?? i mean, we could need a change :D !
what do u guys think ?? i won't put unless pple over'ere agrees !
-
i agree!
love that kinda posts, posted one already a few dozen threads back, lets see who got better ones :P
-
This is my favourite insult
It must be my fate to be taunted by stupid men and women who think they can gather up all the good sense they've ever made into a mute point and throw it. It takes less to silence you than it does to subdue a dog doesnt it?
-
This is my favourite insult
It must of my fate to be taunted by stupid men and women who think they can gather up all the good sense they've ever made into a mute point and throw it. It takes less to silence you than it does to subdue a dog doesnt it?
WOW. BIG WORDS !
i understand the 2nd sentence (and *applause* ), bt if i know what a 'mute point' exactly is, i would understand the 1st sentence ;D ;D ..
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This is my favourite insult
It must of my fate to be taunted by stupid men and women who think they can gather up all the good sense they've ever made into a mute point and throw it. It takes less to silence you than it does to subdue a dog doesnt it?
lol
nice one
-
i agree!
love that kinda posts, posted one already a few dozen threads back, lets see who got better ones :P
okei dokei.
ur permission is enuff 4 me to post ;D . (although if nyone minds 4 i dunno, ny reason (0_o), i wouldn't)
;D
-
Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental!
As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?
Careful now, don't let your brains go to your head!
Diarrhea of the mouth; constipation of the ideas. >>> my favorite ;D
Do you want me to accept you as you are or do you want me to like you?
He has one brain cell, and it is fighting for dominance. (lool)
He is so short, when it rains he is always the last one to know. (sry short pple)
He's so dense that light bends around him.
I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works! (i use it)
I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!
-
This is my favourite insult
It must of my fate to be taunted by stupid men and women who think they can gather up all the good sense they've ever made into a mute point and throw it. It takes less to silence you than it does to subdue a dog doesnt it?
WOW. BIG WORDS !
i understand the 2nd sentence (and *applause* ), bt if i know what a 'mute point' exactly is, i would understand the 1st sentence ;D ;D ..
A mute point is something that misses the question it is aimed at.
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This is my favourite insult
It must of my fate to be taunted by stupid men and women who think they can gather up all the good sense they've ever made into a mute point and throw it. It takes less to silence you than it does to subdue a dog doesnt it?
WOW. BIG WORDS !
i understand the 2nd sentence (and *applause* ), bt if i know what a 'mute point' exactly is, i would understand the 1st sentence ;D ;D ..
A mute point is something that misses the question it is aimed at.
ahhhhhh !
again : WOW! BIG WORDS!
hehe, i might wanna use this when i'm a little grown up so it would suit the 'men and women' in the insult !
-
Thanks. I wrote it.
-
Thanks. I wrote it.
GOOD JOB !
can i use it when i'm 27 ?? ;D
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Thanks. I wrote it.
GOOD JOB !
can i use it when i'm 27 ?? ;D
why can't you use it now?
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i wanna be the first one to write in the 200th page of this thread ;D i was the first to write in the first page...nd then the 100th..lol
:P :P :P :P :P
-
ok now the pakistani thread is sooo much close to their 3000th posts :o
i have to be the first to reach it :P
-
funny how u didnt announce ur close to ur 2000th post, or did u not notice it :P
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guys!!!!!!!!!!!finally our 200th post is close!!!
-
is anyone here????
-
guys!!!!!!!!!!!finally our 200th post is close!!!
wat 200th post?? ???
-
i meant 200th page
-
mony...........ur 2000th post is near!!!!!!!!!
its party time!!
-
hahaha..thx mate!!!!!!!!
urr sweet..y dont u join our family?? :P
-
ia m already a family member.i suppose.....
but nobody pays attention to me :P
-
THIS IS THE 200TH PAGE OF THIS THREAD
AND THIS IS MY 2000TH POST!!!
-
YAY!
anyways, this thread looks like its about to die, seriously, cant see much jokes anymore
-
it is indeed
-
ia m already a family member.i suppose.....
but nobody pays attention to me :P
lol...no...we do..i mean ur my brother??!!
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ia m already a family member.i suppose.....
but nobody pays attention to me :P
lol...no...we do..i mean ur my brother??!!
ok sis........so how do u do? :P
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yo i have a suggestion..
y don't u guys change the thread of this name to something like
Chatting thread.. or Chit-Chat or.. etc
better than jokes and riddles.. ;)
-
fine brother..u? :P
and eagle change the name??!! hmmmmm........
and its still alive..i mean Sanity(thanks to him) posts jokes :D
-
there is already something called chit chat.
-
lol..yea...maybe another name :-\
-
ok guys!!! hers da joke of da day!!!!!!!!
+rep if u like it!!! :P
The Train
A few days ago, a mother was working in the kitchen and listening to her son playing with his new electric trains in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All you sons of bitches who want to get off, get the hell off now because this is the last stop. All of you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses on the train now, because we're leaving."
The mother went into the living room and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now go to your room for two hours. When you calm down, you may play with your trains as long as you use proper language."
Two hours later, the mother was still working in the kitchen when her son came out of his room and resumed playing with his trains. The train stopped and the mother heard, "All passengers who are disembarking the train, please remember to take your belongings. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one.
For those just boarding, we ask that you stow your hand luggage under the seat and we hope you enjoy your trip. For those of you who are pissed off about the two hour delay, please see the b*tch in the kitchen!"
-
ahahaha.....ok +rep for u :D
-
ok 5 more posts till the 3000th post ;D
-
ahahaha.....ok +rep for u :D
r u sure u did +rep and not-rep ::)
-
Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.
A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. "We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole," said Bubba, "but we don't have a ladder." The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts, and laid the pole down. Then she took a tape measure from her pocket, took a measurement and announced, "Eighteen feet, six inches," and walked away.
Junior shook his head and laughed. "Ain't that just like a dumb blonde! We ask for the height, and she gives us the length!"
-
There were two blondes, and they had just came from a store.
The blonde that owned the mustang had locked her keys in the car. She was trying to pick the lock when she stoped to rest for a second.
When she sat down, her friend said, "Hurry up, it's starting to rain and the top's down!"
-
THIS IS THE 3000TH POST IN THIS THREAD :D :D :D
-
haha wow..thx mates for helping me!!
now this thread is the first thread to reach the 3000th post :D :D :D
hahaha..nice :D nd this is my 2009th post :P
-
guys...check out this one!!!! hope u get it!!
Driving Violations
A man who is driving a car is stopped by a police officer. The following exchange takes place....
The man says "What's the problem officer?"
Officer: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.
Man: No sir, I was going 65.
Wife: Oh, Harry. You were going 80.
[Man gives his wife a dirty look.]
Officer: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light.
Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!
Wife: Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks.
[Man gives his wife a dirty look.]
Officer: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your
seat belt.
Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car.
Wife: Oh, Harry, you never wear your seat belt.
Man turns to his wife and yells: "Shut your damn mouth!"
Officer turns to the woman and asks, "Ma'am, does your husband talk to you like this all the time?
Wife says: "No, only when he's drunk!"
-
This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked.
She stuck her head out and said, 'Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes...'
-
see previous page for more.. :P
A Policeman was drilling 3 blondes, who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the 1st blonde a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it. "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The first blonde answers " That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye"
The policeman says "Well...Uh.. that's because the picture shows his profile" Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second blonde and asked her "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The second blonde giggles, flips her hair and says "Ha! He'd be easy to catch because he only has one ear!"
The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two? Of course only one eye and ear are showing because it's a picture of his profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?" Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third blonde and in a very testy voice asks "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?" He adds quickly "....think hard before giving a stupid answer"
The Blonde looks at the picture intently for a moment and says "HMMMM... the suspect is wearing contact lenses."
The policeman is surprised and speechless, because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not. "Well, that is a good answer.. wait here for a few minutes while I check his file, and I'll get back to you on that" He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file in his computer and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.
"WoW! I can't believe it...it's TRUE! The suspect does in fact wear contacts lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"
"That's easy" the blonde replied. "He can't wear glasses because he only has one eye and one ear!"
LMAOO!!
-
A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor queries.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her *husband*!"
dammn i said jokes thats enough for this whoole day..
-
There was a woman who was pregnant with twins, and shortly before they were due, she had an accident and went into a coma. Her husband was away on business, and unable to be reached. While in the coma, she gave birth to her twins, and the only person around to name her children was her brother.
When the mother came out of her coma to find she had given birth and that her brother had named the twins, she became very worried, because he wasn't a very bright guy. She was sure he had named them something absurd or stupid.
When she saw her brother she asked him about the twins.
He said, "The first one was a girl."
The mother: "What did you name her?!?"
Brother: "Denise!"
The Mom: "Oh, wow, that's not bad! What about the second one?"
Brother: "The second one was a boy."
The Mom: "Oh, and what did you name him?"
Brother: "Denephew."
nd just in case u dont understand it.. Neice is ur bro's/sisster's daughter.. :P
-
Two blondes decided to rob a bank together. The first blonde, Judy plans the robbery
and goes over the plan with the second blonde, Buffie, in great detail.
The robbery begins.
Judy drives up in front of the bank, stops the car and says to Buffie, "I want to make
absolutely sure you understand the plan. You are supposed to be in and out of the
bank in no more than three minutes with the cash. Do you understand the plan?"
"Perfectly," said Buffie.
Buffie goes in the bank while Judy waits in the getaway car.
One minute passes . . .
Two minutes pass . . .
Seven minutes pass . . . and Judy is really stressing out.
Finally, the bank doors burst open! And here comes Buffie. She's got a safe wrapped
up in rope and is dragging it to the car.
About the time she gets the safe in the trunk of the car, the bank doors burst open
again with the security guard coming out.
The guard's pants and underwear are down around his ankles while he is firing his
weapon.
As the gals are getting away, Judy says "You are such a blonde! I thought you
understood the plan!"
Buffie said, "I did . . . I did exactly what you said!"
"No, you idiot," said Judy. "I said tie up the GUARD and blow the SAFE!"
-
John gets a call from his blonde girlfriend, Buffy. "I've got a problem,"
says Buffy.
"What's the matter?" asks John.
"Well, I've bought this jigsaw puzzle, but it's too hard. None of the pieces
fit together and I can't find any edges," she tells him.
"What's the picture of?" asks John.
"It's of a big Rooster," replies Buffy.
"All right," says John, "I'll come over and have a look."
So he goes over to Buffy's house and she shows him the jigsaw on the
kitchen table. John looks at the jigsaw and then turns to Buffy and says,
"For Pete's sake - put the Cornflakes back in the Box!"
-
hahaha ok these r funny...i liked the pregnant women..lol....
thxxxxxx mate!! +rep for u :D
-
hahaha ok these r funny...i liked the pregnant women..lol....
thxxxxxx mate!! +rep for u :D
lol.. glad u like'em
-
guys!!!! i hav jokes they r hilarious but adult rated!!!!!!
so wat do i do!!!!
should i post them???
-
guys!!!! i hav jokes they r hilarious but adult rated!!!!!!
so wat do i do!!!!
should i post them???
I think its ok..but not that much over rated..u know :-\
and the pakistanis thread..mashalla is about to reach the 3000th post..lol!!
-
guys!!!! i hav jokes they r hilarious but adult rated!!!!!!
so wat do i do!!!!
should i post them???
I think its ok..but not that much over rated..u know :-\
and the pakistanis thread..mashalla is about to reach the 3000th post..lol!!
yea mashalla!!! ;D
*raisin her collar*
-
i posted over there nd u posted here..lol!!
congrats anyway!! we should make a party together :P hahaha!!
-
i posted over there nd u posted here..lol!!
congrats anyway!! we should make a party together :P hahaha!!
loll...yea sure..y not!!!
-
i posted over there nd u posted here..lol!!
congrats anyway!! we should make a party together :P hahaha!!
yeah sure............
so r u dressed 4 da occasion ???? :P
-
i don't know brother.. r u dressed??!! :P
we should make a biggggg partyy in the partyy thread..maybe after a week or sumthin..lol...when everyone is bored of gettin out :P
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ok!!!!!!!!
everyone is enjoin!!!!!
most of da guys left aftr 12
-
hey why aint u people out??!! :P
-
am actually back, look at the tyme, dont u ppl get curfews?
-
ya its 12:30, i came back home at 11:30....and maybe they r tired and went to bed :D
-
yea thats prolly it
-
lool. u guys, this thread os dying, & i dont want it to die.
so, try to post some, & i will try too now. hope, just i dont post some that r already there !
-
hahaha thx E_T!!!
this thread is already dead aslan :D
-
i thought u gonna post some insults ET?
-
CONGRATZ OMER FOR UR 600TH POST!!! :D
hmmm insults??!! in my thread??!! i dunt want it to be removed or locked :P :P :P
-
la2 7abibty, its still not dead, its still on death bed not dead, bt imma post some insults that'll bring it back to life, like i promised !
yeah omar, i actually did, some pages back !
& here r some more !
looooooool. la2a, da astar kamana shared !
-
hahaha walhi u r crazy..insults!! hahaha
-
CONGRATZ OMER FOR UR 600TH POST!!! :D
hmmm insults??!! in my thread??!! i dunt want it to be removed or locked :P :P :P
THANK YOU MONNY (funny how i didnt notice it)
and yea, we all put, i remember Astar's but i cant remember ET's
hmm, lemme scroll back
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oh wi congratz omAr 4 ur 600th post, what do u want me to get u ??
oh, herez sth, how about being more easy on u in the other thread ?? ;D ;D :P :P :P
i mean thats a gr8 thing to offer, isnt it ?? :P
-
hahahaha...ya maybe
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oh wi congratz omAr 4 ur 600th post, what do u want me to get u ??
oh, herez sth, how about being more easy on u in the other thread ?? ;D ;D :P :P :P
i mean thats a gr8 thing to offer, isnt it ?? :P
oh well... something is better than nuthing, but then come again, w8, i was already winning, but winning easily aint that fun!
lemme think
how about a CAKE?
-
here............................."CAKE" try to get it off the screen!! :P :P
-
lol thanks
(p.s. next time u myte wanna be a bit more generous with the frosting :P )
-
shouldnt the cake be shared ??
& u say WE r greedy !
-
ask the gals for dat!! theyre frosty!! im a warm-hearted guy :P :P....harraq qalb?? ???
-
shouldnt the cake be shared ??
& u say WE r greedy !
i thought he gave u ur shares? or u want more
@ wotever: warm-hearted : "Qalby Dafi2"
harraq qalby means ur heart is spicy :P
-
Thanks........shukran.............jazakallah...... ;D ;D
-
loooooooool @ wotever 'qalby 7arra2' .. so cute trying to grasp arabic as much as u can !
@ omAr : HE was supposed to give us our shares ?? he must've eaten them already !
-
3AFWAN
-
im determined to learn, even if i look like a fool! :P :P
no my waist is still 28....... 8) 8)
nd i gave it all to him, all thee four letters..... omer, can u giv her a C? or an A, K or E? ;D ;D
-
no, thanks u guys !
u eat the cake, u deserve it cuz WE MADE u win in that last thread !
share some abdo, be polite !
or do u want me to teach u the manners too ??
-
share some abdo, be polite !
or do u want me to teach u the manners too ??
what did i do ???
-
no. lool.
no, dude, i was trying to make them share WITH u !
i think i mistyped there.
-
E_T u made the poor guy ask himself...lol
look at my post no. it's the code no for kuwait 965 ;D
-
lool. i know.
he was like 'what did i do ???' so innocently !
hehe.
how r u guyz this morning ??
-
doing great ;D
how about u all??
E_T
X Abdulrahman X??
-
doing great ;D
how about u all??
E_T
X Abdulrahman X??
i'm gr8, i guess.
just hope to go out 2day !
what r UR plans 4 2day ??
-
today is my last exam...after that im going out with my cousins..dont know where cuz im not driving (will throw this mission on the one who drives :D)
Probably malls..do some shopping ;D
u?? anything interesting?!
-
today is my last exam...after that im going out with my cousins..dont know where cuz im not driving (will throw this mission on the one who drives :D)
Probably malls..do some shopping ;D
u?? anything interesting?!
oh, so ur finishing ur exams 2day. GR8 ! Finally ya 3ame. zamanek zehe2ty !
ENJOY UR DAY TO THE MAX SINCE ITS FINALLY UR LAST ! ;) ;)
moi ?? i dunno. imma go out with my friends 2moro, bt dunno 2day, i wanna go out with my family ANYWHERE !
just dont wanna stay @ home. & if i dont, u'll definitely c me here & i'd be watching just movies or sth.
-
ee wallah zh2t!! yallah finally this came to an end!!
What movie??! ;D
-
ee wallah zh2t!! yallah finally this came to an end!!
What movie??! ;D
yeah finally ! yalla, have a blast !
i dunno, therez this will smith movie '7 pounds', i wanted to watch for like 3 months or sth, bt its i either forget or am busy.
so, def. imma watch it 2day.
then i dunno, look 4 anotha movie.
ny good onez u watched recently ??
-
Yeah, Ive wotched 7 pounds... I thwt it was OK the rst tym I wtched it, but then I had 2 wotch it agen to really understand it ... then it was goood ...
so wotch it ... ;D
-
I JUST OVERDOSED!!
i watched:
push,
fast and the furious 4,
knowing,
pink panther 2,
the day the earth stood still...............
-
Yeah, Ive wotched 7 pounds... I thwt it was OK the rst tym I wtched it, but then I had 2 wotch it agen to really understand it ... then it was goood ...
so wotch it ... ;D
THATS A GREATER MOTIVE !
thank u. cant believe didnt watch yet too.
-
7 pounds was a great movie but liked the persuit of happiness more!!!
-
7 pounds was a great movie but liked the persuit of happiness more!!!
OOOOOhh ,,,!! That was ammmaaaaaazzzinggg !!!
lol. But that was so good man !!
-
guyz........wtch some good moviez ....i mean 7 pounds is old!!!!
has anyone seen....push......
-
guyz........wtch some good moviez ....i mean 7 pounds is old!!!!
has anyone seen....push......
push ??? noo whtz it abt ??
temme sum gd movies 2 watch ?? :)
-
guyz........wtch some good moviez ....i mean 7 pounds is old!!!!
has anyone seen....push......
push ??? noo whtz it abt ??
temme sum gd movies 2 watch ?? :)
SUREE.......
i would recommend.....
untraceable
pink panther 2
push is action movie
fast and the furious 4
taken
death race......
I AM A MOVIE GEEK!!!!!
tell me which genre u like!!!
so i will tell u accordingly!!!
-
guyz........wtch some good moviez ....i mean 7 pounds is old!!!!
has anyone seen....push......
push ??? noo whtz it abt ??
temme sum gd movies 2 watch ?? :)
SUREE.......
i would recommend.....
untraceable
pink panther 2
push is action movie
fast and the furious 4
taken
death race......
I AM A MOVIE GEEK!!!!!
tell me which genre u like!!!
so i will tell u accordingly!!!
mmm i like comedy, horror is okayy, nd maybe even romance
-
hmm..ok 4 comedy....
pink panther 1 and 2 is a must watch!!!!
then...wild hogs..
paul blart mall cop.
then 4 horror..saw1,2,3,4,5 is a must watch.....u will surely be at da edge of ur seat...
wrong turn 1,2
romantic comedy : i now pronounce u chuck and lary.
anger management..
marley and me........
-
hmm..ok 4 comedy....
pink panther 1 and 2 is a must watch!!!!
then...wild hogs..
paul blart mall cop.
then 4 horror..saw1,2,3,4,5 is a must watch.....u will surely be at da edge of ur seat...
wrong turn 1,2
romantic comedy : i now pronounce u chuck and lary.
anger management..
marley and me........
thankzzz sooooo much <3 know i have a list of movies to keep me entertained <3
:) :) :) :) :) :-*
-
i hav millions.perhaps yea,,1 tb of hard disk complete with moviez...
tell me if u need more...
i am filtering u and telling.....
i really watched silly moviez.which hav wasted a lot of my time......
one of them is da ltest one ...knowing.......
-
i hav millions.perhaps yea,,1 tb of hard disk complete with moviez...
tell me if u need more...
i am filtering u and telling.....
i really watched silly moviez.which hav wasted a lot of my time......
one of them is da ltest one ...knowing.......
okaayyy wooww thtz a lot......
but not now when i finish watching most of them i'll ask u.... 8) :)
-
The Monk (voted best ending to a religous joke :P)
A man is driving down the road when his car breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, "My car has broken down. Do you think I could stay the night?"
The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound.
The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk." The man is disappointed but thanks themanyway and goes about his merry way.
Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.
The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk."
The man says, "All right, all right. I'm dying to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?"
The monks reply, "You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk."
The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, "I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth."
The monks reply, "Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound." The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, "The sound is right behind that door."
The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, "Real funny. May I have the key?" The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, amethyst...
Finally, the monks say, "This is the last key to the last door." The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.....
But I can't tell YOU what it is, because YOU'RE not a monk!
omg, this joke is such a pain in the neck !! GOD, after reading ALLLLLLLLL of this !
how annoying !!! and q8oboy, ur annoyinger 4 posting it !
-
Q: Why can't you tell blondes knock-knock jokes?
A: Because they leave to go answer the door.
looool
-
check put this joke haha...
Q. What's O. J. Simpson's Internet address?
A. Slash, slash, backslash, slash, slash, escape.
-
here r some more.........
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with...
The other is used to carry groceries.
-
Harrassment
A man walks up to a woman in his office each day, stands very close to her, draws in a large breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice.
After a week of this she can't stand it any longer! The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that
she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.
The supervisor is puzzled by this and says what's wrong with the co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?
The woman replies, "He's a midget"!
-
Saved Your Privates
A soldier goes into the hospital for surgery after being wounded in battle.
Waking up from the anesthesia he sees his doctor standing at his bedside. "So tell me Doc, what did you do to me?"
The doctor says, "Son, we have some good news and some bad news."
"Yeah, what?" replies the patient.
"Well the good news is that we were able to save your private parts."
"Yes, that is good news Doc, but what about the bad news?"
"We put them under your pillow!"
-
Harrassment
A man walks up to a woman in his office each day, stands very close to her, draws in a large breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice.
After a week of this she can't stand it any longer! The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that
she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.
The supervisor is puzzled by this and says what's wrong with the co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?
The woman replies, "He's a midget"!
OH, OMG. LOOOOOOOOOL !
-
hahaha nice mr. B
-
+ rep if u like....... ;)
The soldier serving overseas and far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote breaking off their
engagement and asking for her photograph back.
A creative fellow, he went out and collected from his buddies all the unwanted photographs of women that he
could find, bundled them all together and sent them to her with a note stating the following:
"Dear Mary,
I can not remember which one is you ... please keep YOUR photo and return the others!"
-
ooo deaar, the woman will be sooo pissssssssssed hahaha :D
-
ooo deaar, the woman will be sooo pissssssssssed hahaha :D
exactly!!
-
+ rep if u like....... ;)
The soldier serving overseas and far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote breaking off their
engagement and asking for her photograph back.
A creative fellow, he went out and collected from his buddies all the unwanted photographs of women that he
could find, bundled them all together and sent them to her with a note stating the following:
"Dear Mary,
I can not remember which one is you ... please keep YOUR photo and return the others!"
hehehe. thats jst 'ouch', bt i like his attitude. hehe. y would she pissed ?? women could be women smetimes !
-
thanx guys!!!
ok so now tell me da ans of this one?
I am a father's child, a mother's child, yet no one's son.
Who am I.
-
can u do this one:
There is an ancient invention still used in some parts of the world today that allows people to see through walls.
What is it?
-
a daughter.....:D
-
thanx guys!!!
ok so now tell me da ans of this one?
I am a father's child, a mother's child, yet no one's son.
Who am I.
their daughter ? :P
-
a window.....some parts in the world? :D lol hahaha
-
yup sanity thats right!!!!!
do this one ppl...
Take off my skin - I won't cry, but you will! What am I?
this is da easiest one..........
-
yup sanity thats right!!!!!
do this one ppl...
Take off my skin - I won't cry, but you will! What am I?
this is da easiest one..........
ONION!!!!
-
LOL.......those riddles are hilarious :D lol
-
i was gonna say that :P
-
i was gonna say that :P
U R SLOW!! :P :P :D
wuzzup cousin :D
-
i was gonna say that :P
U R SLOW!! :P :P :D
wuzzup cousin :D
I R Good, How R U ?
-
1.What can fill a room but takes up no space?
2.A warrior amongst the flowers, he bears a thrusting sword. He uses it when'er he must to defend his golden hoard.
What is he?
3.I reach for the sky, but clutch to the ground; sometimes I leave, but I am always around. What am I?
NOW DO THESE....................................!!!!!!!! :) 8)
-
all of them have the same answer, air ?
-
1.What can fill a room but takes up no space?
2.A warrior amongst the flowers, he bears a thrusting sword. He uses it when'er he must to defend his golden hoard.
What is he?
3.I reach for the sky, but clutch to the ground; sometimes I leave, but I am always around. What am I?
NOW DO THESE....................................!!!!!!!! :) 8)
1. gas
2. dunno
3. Tree
-
i was gonna say that :P
U R SLOW!! :P :P :D
wuzzup cousin :D
I R Good, How R U ?
I R great...........shouldnt be +repping for correct answers? :D :P
-
zainy only da last one is correct....
1st is wrong.......
-
2. A bee
:D
-
zainy only da last one is correct....
1st is wrong.......
ohhk lol
is the 1st one air, or smthin
-
What does a blind man see,
a deaf man hear,
and if you eat it you are sure to die?
4rm now i will be +repping...if its correct...but if its wrong u will +rep me!! deal??
-
1.................i hav 2 guess...
2.sanity is correct....
3.tree....as zainy said..
-
What does a blind man see,
a deaf man hear,
and if you eat it you are sure to die?
4rm now i will be +repping...if its correct...but if its wrong u will +rep me!! deal??
ummm.... Dreaamms nt sure abt the eatin part though :-\
-
dont know the first one.............light maybe??
-
thats rong.....zainy now..+rep me!!!!!
-
thats rong.....zainy now..+rep me!!!!!
kk done !! am confused :-\
-
What does a blind man see,
a deaf man hear,
and if you eat it you are sure to die?
4rm now i will be +repping...if its correct...but if its wrong u will +rep me!! deal??
do blind men see and deaf pple hear in their dreams ?? 0_o
ummm.... Dreaamms nt sure abt the eatin part though :-\
-
dont know the first one.............light maybe??
LIGHT IS CORRECT!!!!!!!!
-
What does a blind man see,
a deaf man hear,
and if you eat it you are sure to die?
4rm now i will be +repping...if its correct...but if its wrong u will +rep me!! deal??
should i tell da ans..........
or will some one guess!!!
-
dont know the first one.............light maybe??
LIGHT IS CORRECT!!!!!!!!
hahahahhahaa..........lucky me :D lol
-
What does a blind man see,
a deaf man hear,
and if you eat it you are sure to die?
4rm now i will be +repping...if its correct...but if its wrong u will +rep me!! deal??
do blind men see and deaf pple hear in their dreams ?? 0_o
ummm.... Dreaamms nt sure abt the eatin part though :-\
mm... maybe they do lol i dunno :-\
-
What always goes to bed with his shoes on?
-
A horse.
-
What always goes to bed with his shoes on?
ME !! =D
-
A horse.
thats rite!!! sir........+rep to u
-
What does a blind man see,
a deaf man hear,
and if you eat it you are sure to die?
4rm now i will be +repping...if its correct...but if its wrong u will +rep me!! deal??
should i tell da ans..........
or will some one guess!!!
-
What does a blind man see,
a deaf man hear,
and if you eat it you are sure to die?
4rm now i will be +repping...if its correct...but if its wrong u will +rep me!! deal??
should i tell da ans..........
or will some one guess!!!
a nightmare ?
-
A horse.
nice answer sir :D
-
What does a blind man see,
a deaf man hear,
and if you eat it you are sure to die?
4rm now i will be +repping...if its correct...but if its wrong u will +rep me!! deal??
the ans is NOTHING
a blind man see's NOTHING,
a deaf man hear'S NOTHING
and if you eat it NOTHING you are sure to die?
-
What always goes to bed with his shoes on?
ME !! =D
Lol.. ur not serious are you ..:P ?
-
Why is the answer always so simple?
-
What always goes to bed with his shoes on?
ME !! =D
Lol.. ur not serious are you ..:P ?
hehe. dont make fun of'em, cuz i kinda smetimes too.
when i've been outside & i cme really tired. the bed looks so irresistable.
-
Why is the answer always so simple?
mm... is this riddle... ?? lol
:D
-
What always goes to bed with his shoes on?
ME !! =D
Lol.. ur not serious are you ..:P ?
hehe. dont make fun of'em, cuz i kinda smetimes too.
when i've been outside & i cme really tired. the bed looks so irresistable.
i was actually kidding :P
-
What always goes to bed with his shoes on?
ME !! =D
Lol.. ur not serious are you ..:P ?
hehe. dont make fun of'em, cuz i kinda smetimes too.
when i've been outside & i cme really tired. the bed looks so irresistable.
i was actually kidding :P
lol... phew... I thought thwt they only did that stuff in movies :P :P
-
What always goes to bed with his shoes on?
ME !! =D
hehe. dont make fun of'em, cuz i kinda smetimes too.
when i've been outside & i cme really tired. the bed looks so irresistable.
i was actually kidding :P
lol... phew... I thought thwt they only did that stuff in movies :P :P
ehm ehm.
hehehe, i said i do DO that.
yeah, abdo, i kinda thought out u were kidding ! hehe
Lol.. ur not serious are you ..:P ?
-
mr. boom ?? did u run out of riddles ??
-
mr. boom ?? did u run out of riddles ??
yea.....we r hungry for more!
-
i think he went off :(
-
k, u guys, it would be appreciated if u make me think that u guys r there too !
-
i think he went off :(
im here....but i guess i gotta go now....
-
guys!!! i am back!!!!!!!!!
i was BUSY!!!
i went outside..so...
do u want a piece of me!!!!!!!!
-
guys!!! i am back!!!!!!!!!
i was BUSY!!!
i went outside..so...
do u want a piece of me!!!!!!!!
C'MMON POST POST ! :)
-
mr. boom ?? did u run out of riddles ??
no i didnt!!!!
-
mr. boom ?? did u run out of riddles ??
no i didnt!!!!
gd
-
con u figure out this one.........
u hav to ans...briefly.....like in sentences...cuz..its not a one word ans...
A rich man's son was kidnapped. The ransom note told him to bring a valuable diamond to a phone booth in the
middle of a public park. Plainclothes police officers surrounded the park, intending to follow the criminal or his
messenger. The rich man arrived at the phone booth and followed instructions but the police were powerless to
prevent the diamond from leaving the park and reaching the crafty villain.
What did he do?
-
dude, this is a tough one. and am nt that bright !
-
WOW. gr8 reaction to me sayin 'am nt that bright'
hehe. u go offline !
-
WOW. gr8 reaction to me sayin 'am nt that bright'
hehe. u go offline !
i said i am busy!!!!
i am back now!!!
so did u get da ans!!!
-
WOW. gr8 reaction to me sayin 'am nt that bright'
hehe. u go offline !
i said i am busy!!!!
i am back now!!!
so did u get da ans!!!
hehe, chill, i was jus trynna be funny !
nyways, no, i didnt get the ans.
-
cuumon wr did u go!!!
this one below is da one which my cousin asked me:
do u hav da GUTS TO ANS THIS ONE:......ITS A ONE WORD ANS............!!!!!
I am just two and two. I am hot. I am cold. I am the parent of numbers that cannot be told. I am a gift beyond
measure, a matter of course. I am given with pleasure when taken by force.
What am I?
-
cuumon wr did u go!!!
this one below is da one which my cousin asked me:
do u hav da GUTS TO ANS THIS ONE:......ITS A ONE WORD ANS............!!!!!
I am just two and two. I am hot. I am cold. I am the parent of numbers that cannot be told. I am a gift beyond
measure, a matter of course. I am given with pleasure when taken by force.
What am I?
looooooool. dude, what is this ?? im beginnin to think am stupid.
wait, whats the ans. first 4 the other q. ??
-
mr. boom ??
-
mr. boom ??
1st u guess this one then i will tell da prev ans....
-
I have no idea.
-
mr. boom ??
1st u guess this one then i will tell da prev ans....
ITS REALLY HARD !
plzz tell me.
-
u will neveeeeeer know the answer until u cheat like me ;D
-
n like me....loll
-
lool. u guys r annoying.
c'mmon, tell me ;D ;D!
-
KISS....loll
-
KISS....loll
dude?? r u k?? loool. what kiss ??
-
KISS....loll
dude?? r u k?? loool. what kiss ??
dats the answer to boombastic's riddle...
-
KISS....loll
dude?? r u k?? loool. what kiss ??
dats the answer to boombastic's riddle...
hehehe, which one ??
-
KISS....loll
dude?? r u k?? loool. what kiss ??
dats the answer to boombastic's riddle...
hehehe, which one ??
I am just two and two. I am hot. I am cold. I am the parent of numbers that cannot be told. I am a gift beyond
measure, a matter of course. I am given with pleasure when taken by force.
What am I?
this one...
-
KISS....loll
dude?? r u k?? loool. what kiss ??
dats the answer to boombastic's riddle...
hehehe, which one ??
I am just two and two. I am hot. I am cold. I am the parent of numbers that cannot be told. I am a gift beyond
measure, a matter of course. I am given with pleasure when taken by force.
What am I?
this one...
howz the answer kiss ??
loool. i would never have guessed it 'kiss'
-
neither me...lollzz....dats y i said "like me" ...i mean i googled...loll....cz i wanted the answer...wz too curious.... ;D
-
I am still puzzled.
-
the ans..is kiss........BUT ZARA U R A CHEATER!!!! >:( >:( >:( :( :o
-
u guys didnt talk for over an hour!!
-
hellooooo ???
*echo of my hellooooo*
-
hellooooo ???
*echo of my hellooooo*
HELLOOOOO.....oooooo.......OOOOOOOOOO
SAVE ME!!!!
hahahahhaa
-
hello 2 ;)
-
Hiii!
-
mony will be mad, this is happenin to her thread.
the prob. is i once wanted to post jokes, bt i had bout 190 pages be4 me to read 1st so i'd make sure i dont repeat the same jokes. so, i didnt post ny.
-
mony will be mad, this is happenin to her thread.
the prob. is i once wanted to post jokes, bt i had bout 190 pages be4 me to read 1st so i'd make sure i dont repeat the same jokes. so, i didnt post ny.
dont worry.....no 1 remembers the jokes posted before, and we will laugh again :D lol
-
any torrent fans in here?
oh well, just thought to tell u that Demonoid registrations r open ryte now
(made a second account just for the heck of it :D )
-
any torrent fans in here?
oh well, just thought to tell u that Demonoid registrations r open ryte now
(made a second account just for the heck of it :D )
is that a new torrent site ??
-
any torrent fans in here?
oh well, just thought to tell u that Demonoid registrations r open ryte now
(made a second account just for the heck of it :D )
is that a new torrent site ??
its like the oldest one, but registration is very restricted and is rarely opened
i already had an account thanks to a freind's invitation, but i just registered again just in case :D
-
any torrent fans in here?
oh well, just thought to tell u that Demonoid registrations r open ryte now
(made a second account just for the heck of it :D )
is that a new torrent site ??
its like the oldest one, but registration is very restricted and is rarely opened
i already had an account thanks to a freind's invitation, but i just registered again just in case :D
U KIDDING ME>>>>>>>>>WOHOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Thanks for that!! :D
-
r there like special times where they open it? :D
-
ure welcome snitty, and yea, they only open it for like a couple of hours each month
-
ure welcome snitty, and yea, they only open it for like a couple of hours each month
MADE ONE!!!!!!
ROFL :D
-
made 1.....but wht do u like do on the website? is it 4 movies and songs only?
-
torrent sites usually have everything ..
u just 1st need to download the torrent program.
-
torrent sites usually have everything ..
u just 1st need to download the torrent program.
utorrent if the best!!! :D
-
torrent sites usually have everything ..
u just 1st need to download the torrent program.
utorrent if the best!!! :D
utorrent and piratebay, all the way.
lool. that rhymes.
-
torrent sites usually have everything ..
u just 1st need to download the torrent program.
utorrent if the best!!! :D
utorrent and piratebay, all the way.
lool. that rhymes.
i meant the program :D lol :P :D
-
made 1.....but wht do u like do on the website? is it 4 movies and songs only?
music, movies, tv shows, books, podcasts, comics, everything
and yea u need something like Utorrent or warez to download the files
-
ANYBODY WANTS A PIECE OF ME!!!
-
i c........Thanks 4 da info! i jst downloaded brking dawn.so ill prbbly b bz wid tht 4 awhile...lol
when'd u cut urself in2 pieces?Mr.Boom?WHYYYYYYYY?
-
i c........Thanks 4 da info! i jst downloaded brking dawn.so ill prbbly b bz wid tht 4 awhile...lol
when'd u cut urself in2 pieces?Mr.Boom?WHYYYYYYYY?
BOOOOO...............its a figure of speech!!! ::) :P
-
torrent sites usually have everything ..
u just 1st need to download the torrent program.
utorrent if the best!!! :D
utorrent and piratebay, all the way.
lool. that rhymes.
i meant the program :D lol :P :D
loooooool. oh yeah, i gt confused.
so, its just 'utorrent all the wayy!'
-
i c........Thanks 4 da info! i jst downloaded brking dawn.so ill prbbly b bz wid tht 4 awhile...lol
when'd u cut urself in2 pieces?Mr.Boom?WHYYYYYYYY?
BOOOOO...............its a figure of speech!!! ::) :P
loool...i noe! anyways, why's every1 trying to pick a fite?specially the guyyys! I thought we're all family!
-
i c........Thanks 4 da info! i jst downloaded brking dawn.so ill prbbly b bz wid tht 4 awhile...lol
when'd u cut urself in2 pieces?Mr.Boom?WHYYYYYYYY?
BOOOOO...............its a figure of speech!!! ::) :P
loool...i noe! anyways, why's every1 trying to pick a fite?specially the guyyys! I thought we're all family!
yea exactly, brothers and siters love to fyte, its wut they do! and the cousins r always the nice ppl ryte? so now somebody remind me whos my cuz and whos my sis
-
i c........Thanks 4 da info! i jst downloaded brking dawn.so ill prbbly b bz wid tht 4 awhile...lol
when'd u cut urself in2 pieces?Mr.Boom?WHYYYYYYYY?
BOOOOO...............its a figure of speech!!! ::) :P
loool...i noe! anyways, why's every1 trying to pick a fite?specially the guyyys! I thought we're all family!
yea exactly, brothers and siters love to fyte, its wut they do! and the cousins r always the nice ppl ryte? so now somebody remind me whos my cuz and whos my sis
if couz. r the nice pple, i'm def. nt ur cousin ! :P :P
-
i c........Thanks 4 da info! i jst downloaded brking dawn.so ill prbbly b bz wid tht 4 awhile...lol
when'd u cut urself in2 pieces?Mr.Boom?WHYYYYYYYY?
BOOOOO...............its a figure of speech!!! ::) :P
loool...i noe! anyways, why's every1 trying to pick a fite?specially the guyyys! I thought we're all family!
yea exactly, brothers and siters love to fyte, its wut they do! and the cousins r always the nice ppl ryte? so now somebody remind me whos my cuz and whos my sis
if couz. r the nice pple, i'm def. nt ur cousin ! :P :P
yea, more like the evil snitch stepsister :P
-
i think that this thread is meant 4 JOKES AND RIDDLES!!!
-
i c........Thanks 4 da info! i jst downloaded brking dawn.so ill prbbly b bz wid tht 4 awhile...lol
when'd u cut urself in2 pieces?Mr.Boom?WHYYYYYYYY?
BOOOOO...............its a figure of speech!!! ::) :P
loool...i noe! anyways, why's every1 trying to pick a fite?specially the guyyys! I thought we're all family!
yea exactly, brothers and siters love to fyte, its wut they do! and the cousins r always the nice ppl ryte? so now somebody remind me whos my cuz and whos my sis
ROXY and ME r twins......we are ur only cousins........any1 else is a sis or bro :D
-
i c........Thanks 4 da info! i jst downloaded brking dawn.so ill prbbly b bz wid tht 4 awhile...lol
when'd u cut urself in2 pieces?Mr.Boom?WHYYYYYYYY?
BOOOOO...............its a figure of speech!!! ::) :P
loool...i noe! anyways, why's every1 trying to pick a fite?specially the guyyys! I thought we're all family!
yea exactly, brothers and siters love to fyte, its wut they do! and the cousins r always the nice ppl ryte? so now somebody remind me whos my cuz and whos my sis
if couz. r the nice pple, i'm def. nt ur cousin ! :P :P
yea, more like the evil snitch stepsister :P
hehehe. YEAH !
-
i think that this thread is meant 4 JOKES AND RIDDLES!!!
oh, sry boom.
bt, cn u post jokes, nt riddles, cuz i dont like riddles, they're my enemy now since the last time u posted a riddle.
-
i think that this thread is meant 4 JOKES AND RIDDLES!!!
oh, sry boom.
bt, cn u post jokes, nt riddles, cuz i dont like riddles, they're my enemy now since the last time u posted a riddle.
riddles r fun to think about :D lol.......
interesting in fact :D
-
OK .GUYS....THIS IS MR.BooMBastiC...SIGNING OFF......4 TODAY.......
I WILL BE BACK 2MORROW....WITH MORE JOKES AND RIDDLES....[ask my couzins...lol]
UNTIL THEN....Take Care......
ALLAH HAFIZ...
-
etc- every1 Take care=etc...... :P
so etc!
-
etc- every1 Take care=etc...... :P
so etc!
i like Take care better :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
-
ETC!!
-
ITS Take care, :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
HOW WOULD PPLE KNOW IF U MEAN 'ETC.' OR 'ETC=EVERYONE TAKE CARE' ???
-
thts JUST it!! :D
evry1 wud ask, i answer nd dat increases evry1's number of posts!! ;D ;D
-
oh, so its just out of good-will ??? lmao
-
im a universal good willer!
-
ah, really ??
-
no tht was sarcasm......
-
and my 'ah, really ??' was sarcasmer cuz i dont have to ask. i already know ur not.
-
how did u guess dat?? :P :P :P :P :P :P
-
wow!! lol!! my thread increased by many pages!! :D :D :D
thx people!! i got no time to read them all..maybe later!! :P
keep it alive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-* :-* :-*
-
i really miss this thread ... i used to spend a lot of time on it during exams ... those were the days !! :P
-
yes i used to do so...this thread is dead now i think! Shall we bring it to life?? lol
-
yes i used to do so...this thread is dead now i think! Shall we bring it to life?? lol
NO ITS NOT..
SCROLL BACK 4 PAGES..I POSTED LOTS OF JOKES AND RIDDLES!!!
-
oh then it's alive yaaaay :D saved by a miracle!!
-
Here is one of my mathematical jokes.
Let us consider the possibility that this plate is actually a flying saucer.
It is (almost) flat and round, just like a flying saucer. It falls, just like a flying saucer that has run out of fuel.
Strangely small, this flying saucer, like a flying saucer that has passed through a nine dimensional quantum tunneling event and emerged from nine dimensions into four.
If it is a flying saucer it should be able to fly.
sh*t!! I didnt realise that flying saucers disintegrated on impact.
-
con u figure out this one.........
u hav to ans...briefly.....like in sentences...cuz..its not a one word ans...
A rich man's son was kidnapped. The ransom note told him to bring a valuable diamond to a phone booth in the
middle of a public park. Plainclothes police officers surrounded the park, intending to follow the criminal or his
messenger. The rich man arrived at the phone booth and followed instructions but the police were powerless to
prevent the diamond from leaving the park and reaching the crafty villain.
What did he do?
When the rich man reached the phone booth he found a carrier pigeon in a cage. It had a message attached telling the man to put the diamond in a small bag which was around the pigeon's neck and to release the bird.
WHEEEEEEEE
-
con u figure out this one.........
u hav to ans...briefly.....like in sentences...cuz..its not a one word ans...
A rich man's son was kidnapped. The ransom note told him to bring a valuable diamond to a phone booth in the
middle of a public park. Plainclothes police officers surrounded the park, intending to follow the criminal or his
messenger. The rich man arrived at the phone booth and followed instructions but the police were powerless to
prevent the diamond from leaving the park and reaching the crafty villain.
What did he do?
When the rich man reached the phone booth he found a carrier pigeon in a cage. It had a message attached telling the man to put the diamond in a small bag which was around the pigeon's neck and to release the bird.
WHEEEEEEEE
you googled it!!!!!!!!
-
obviously he did!! lol
-
yeah i googled it.
-
HELOOOO, HELOooo, Heloooo .
c'mmon beoble. post sth !
-
do u want me to post somethiog
-
do u want me to post somethiog
EXCEPT for the MANAH lame joke!
-
do u want me to post somethiog
EXCEPT for the MANAH lame joke!
oh..yaar tum mind kar gaye..
and that was not LAME!!
-
do u want me to post somethiog
EXCEPT for the MANAH lame joke!
oh..yaar tum mind kar gaye..
and that was not LAME!!
main joke ko q mind karogee!! u know me not hahaha!
yaa that wasnt it was VERY lame hewheh
-
do u want me to post somethiog
yeah, please.
bt jokes plz ;D
-
do u want me to post somethiog
yeah, please.
bt jokes plz ;D
loll
-
http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/424788
AN ABSOLUTE MUST WATCH!!!!! FOR ANYONE WHOS SEEN BAMBI (the disney deer movie) OR EVEN HEARD OF IT!!!!
-
ehm ehm
-
woooo my thread on the next page.... ;D
so its dead i guess :P
-
woooo my thread on the next page.... ;D
so its dead i guess :P
now its now! ;D ;D
-
This thread cant die :'(
it was the first thread on the forum to reach 1000..n 2000...n 3000....
but not 4000 :'( the pakistani thread won :P
-
This thread cant die :'(
it was the first thread on the forum to reach 1000..n 2000...n 3000....
but not 4000 :'( the pakistani thread won :P
ALL THANX TO ME!! :P :P :P
-
sooo u r the one who was postin much in the pakistani thread >:(
well i posted there too but not much... :P
i will still try n keep this thread alive :P :P
-
This thread cant die :'(
it was the first thread on the forum to reach 1000..n 2000...n 3000....
but not 4000 :'( the pakistani thread won :P
ALL THANX TO ME!! :P :P :P
oye hoiy...boom u took all the credit alone!!!!
tch tch...vry bad... >:(
@mony
all Thanks to me manah chaosking hash zainy icyblind n mor i don't remember atm.....nt alone bommbastic!!!! 8)
-
Very bad boom >:( u took all the credit alone >:(
so yea Zara..its u..n the whole team..how nice ;D
Congrats anyway for ur thread..me still wanna keep my thread alive :P
-
This thread cant die :'(
it was the first thread on the forum to reach 1000..n 2000...n 3000....
but not 4000 :'( the pakistani thread won :P
ALL THANX TO ME!! :P :P :P
oye hoiy...boom u took all the credit alone!!!!
tch tch...vry bad... >:(
@mony
all Thanks to me manah chaosking hash zainy icyblind n mor i don't remember atm.....nt alone bommbastic!!!! 8)
no!!!!!!!
i meant i posetd da most...
all credit goes to ME AND MANA............!!!!!!!
4 keeping da thread on da top!!!
mony...zara..and all yr just SIDE ORDERS...... :P :P :P
-
Very bad boom >:( u took all the credit alone >:(
so yea Zara..its u..n the whole team..how nice ;D
Congrats anyway for ur thread..me still wanna keep my thread alive :P
ayaa...mony...me n m team...loll...
zanks... ;D
ill help u...loll...lemme find sum gud jokes n riddles..
-
awww thx Zara :-* and Boom keep it :-X :-X
so Zara r u in the Family???
-
awww thx Zara :-* and Boom keep it :-X :-X
so Zara r u in the Family???
keep wat!!!! >:( >:( >:( >:(
-
awww thx Zara :-* and Boom keep it :-X :-X
so Zara r u in the Family???
em i??
i dunno...tho i posted a couple of tyms..
-
Boom keep ur :-X :P
and ZARA U R NOT :o :o :o
ok U HAVE TO JOIN!! KHALAS U R ALREADY ONE OF THE FAMILY!!
ok Me..the eldest sister n Abdo..the eldest brother..
Sanity and Roxy r ur cousins...
and the rest like boom, omer, mana, E_t..etc... r ur brothers n sisters ;D
-
Boom keep ur :-X :P
and ZARA U R NOT :o :o :o
ok U HAVE TO JOIN!! KHALAS U R ALREADY ONE OF THE FAMILY!!
ok Me..the eldest sister n Abdo..the eldest brother..
Sanity and Roxy r ur cousins...
and the rest like boom, omer, mana, E_t..etc... r ur brothers n sisters ;D
loll....okay....
soo many bros n sis....god save me!!!!
loll....
okay so den here i cum familee!!!! ;D
-
Boom keep ur :-X :P
and ZARA U R NOT :o :o :o
ok U HAVE TO JOIN!! KHALAS U R ALREADY ONE OF THE FAMILY!!
ok Me..the eldest sister n Abdo..the eldest brother..
Sanity and Roxy r ur cousins...
and the rest like boom, omer, mana, E_t..etc... r ur brothers n sisters ;D
loll....okay....
soo many bros n sis....god save me!!!!
loll....
okay so den here i cum familee!!!! ;D
WELCOME TO DA FAMILY!!.....
we should name it LOL.......like the robinsons or something LOL......wt shall we name it? XD
-
haha yea many brothers n sisters!!!
we will try to modify the Family Tree soon isa..but when eamyy comes online :D
and sanity..hmmmm...maybe the SF family :P
-
ughh mann!!!
cant find ne jokes or riddle atm.... :-\
will post dem ven i find sum....
-
ughh mann!!!
cant find ne jokes or riddle atm.... :-\
will post dem ven i find sum....
i hav some jokes!!!! ::)
-
Walks Into a Bar... Quick Shots
A guy walks into a bar, orders 12 shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can.
The bartender asks, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?"
The guy says, "You would be drinking fast, too, if you had what I had."
The bartender asks, "What do you have?"
The guy says, "75 cents."
-
Who's the Boss?
When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.
The brain said, " I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and functions."
The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go."
The hands said, " We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money."
And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the a**hole spoke up. All the
parts laughed at the idea of the a**hole being the Boss. So the a**hole went on strike, blocked itself up and
refused to work.
Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs
began to panic and the brain fevered.
Eventually they all decided that the a**hole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed. All the other parts
did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the sh*t!
Moral of the story:
You don't need brains to be a Boss - any a**hole will do!
-
https://studentforums.biz/chat/
a chatroom has been made.......!!!!
-
so u guys didnt enter the chatroom and didnt talk over here!! :D LOL
any jokes or riddles!...
HELLOOOOO!
-
lmaaooo i luved da brain nd da a**hole joke lolll :D
-
lmaaooo i luved da brain nd da a**hole joke lolll :D
thank u.... ;D ;D ;D :) :) :) :)
so +reon now
-
lmaaooo i luved da brain nd da a**hole joke lolll :D
thank u.... ;D ;D ;D :) :) :) :)
so +reon now
lmao... fine
me 2 :) ;D
-
hey..hav u listened to that joke in which da donkey says no...
-
hey..hav u listened to that joke in which da donkey says no...
hahahaha, this joke is still alive :D LOL
-
2 Death's in one Family!
A brunette walks over to her Blonde friends home and finds her crying.
"What happened...why are you crying?"
The Blonde tells her that her mother has passed away.
The neighbor makes her some coffee, comforts her and then leaves.
The next day the neighbor goes back over to the house and finds the blonde crying again.
Once again, she asks her why she was crying?
This time the blonde replies hysterically...
"I just got off of the phone with my sister, her mother died too!
-
JOKE-CUM-RIDDLE....
What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? ;D
-
duck?
-
duck?
WAT??? ??? ???
-
duck?
WAT??? ??? ???
like HEADS UP!! :D LOL
-
duck?
WAT??? ??? ???
like HEADS UP!! :D LOL
wat r u talking abt!!!
-
duck?
WAT??? ??? ???
like HEADS UP!! :D LOL
wat r u talking abt!!!
im explaining wt kam said :D
-
what i meant was get down lol
heads up lol sanity
-
what i meant was get down lol
heads up lol sanity
heads up actually means heads down :D LOL
-
no that is worng ans!!!! :o :o :D
-
no that is worng ans!!!! :o :o :D
:D LOL.....
-
what i meant was get down lol
heads up lol sanity
heads up actually means heads down :D LOL
it does?
lol i didnt know tht
so what is the ans then.....
-
Run like hell cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
-
Run like hell cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
hahahahahahahahahahhaa.......+rep for that one! ;) :D
WATCH OUT!!
-
what i meant was get down lol
heads up lol sanity
heads up actually means heads down :D LOL
it does?
lol i didnt know tht
so what is the ans then.....
English has many non-sense stuff :D LOL
this is one of them! :D
-
Run like hell cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
hahahahahahahahahahhaa.......+rep for that one! ;) :D
WATCH OUT!!
thanx man............ :D :) ;)
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
-
it should be moving, dont know y not ? :D
-
it should be moving, dont know y not ? :D
send me da real one...i will make it move
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
new users will be scared off!!! :P :P ;D ;D
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
new users will be scared off!!! :P :P ;D ;D
:D lol......this one of the penguin is moving, not the others although they r all GIF images.....they move when i display them on ma laptop normally, but we i upload them....they dont move a muscle :D
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
new users will be scared off!!! :P :P ;D ;D
:D lol......this one of the penguin is moving, not the others although they r all GIF images.....they move when i display them on ma laptop normally, but we i upload them....they dont move a muscle :D
hahaha i love ur pic!!
u guys where did u get it from? :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
new users will be scared off!!! :P :P ;D ;D
:D lol......this one of the penguin is moving, not the others although they r all GIF images.....they move when i display them on ma laptop normally, but we i upload them....they dont move a muscle :D
hahaha i love ur pic!!
u guys where did u get it from? :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
from the internet :P :D :P :D
google animated avatars....:D u will find wt u want :D
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
new users will be scared off!!! :P :P ;D ;D
:D lol......this one of the penguin is moving, not the others although they r all GIF images.....they move when i display them on ma laptop normally, but we i upload them....they dont move a muscle :D
hahaha i love ur pic!!
u guys where did u get it from? :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
from the internet :P :D :P :D
google animated avatars....:D u will find wt u want :D
zankz ur is funny !!
n adorable too
Love penguins:D
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
new users will be scared off!!! :P :P ;D ;D
:D lol......this one of the penguin is moving, not the others although they r all GIF images.....they move when i display them on ma laptop normally, but we i upload them....they dont move a muscle :D
hahaha i love ur pic!!
u guys where did u get it from? :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
from the internet :P :D :P :D
google animated avatars....:D u will find wt u want :D
zankz ur is funny !!
n adorable too
Love penguins:D
check ma new one :D
i fixed it boom! :D LOL
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
new users will be scared off!!! :P :P ;D ;D
:D lol......this one of the penguin is moving, not the others although they r all GIF images.....they move when i display them on ma laptop normally, but we i upload them....they dont move a muscle :D
hahaha i love ur pic!!
u guys where did u get it from? :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
from the internet :P :D :P :D
google animated avatars....:D u will find wt u want :D
zankz ur is funny !!
n adorable too
Love penguins:D
check ma new one :D
i fixed it boom! :D LOL
hahahaha baan
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
new users will be scared off!!! :P :P ;D ;D
:D lol......this one of the penguin is moving, not the others although they r all GIF images.....they move when i display them on ma laptop normally, but we i upload them....they dont move a muscle :D
hahaha i love ur pic!!
u guys where did u get it from? :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
from the internet :P :D :P :D
google animated avatars....:D u will find wt u want :D
zankz ur is funny !!
n adorable too
Love penguins:D
check ma new one :D
i fixed it boom! :D LOL
hahahaha baan
every1 loved the small penguin :D
-
wt do u think about ma dp.....now thats a real joke :D LOL
new users will be scared off!!! :P :P ;D ;D
:D lol......this one of the penguin is moving, not the others although they r all GIF images.....they move when i display them on ma laptop normally, but we i upload them....they dont move a muscle :D
hahaha i love ur pic!!
u guys where did u get it from? :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
from the internet :P :D :P :D
google animated avatars....:D u will find wt u want :D
zankz ur is funny !!
n adorable too
Love penguins:D
check ma new one :D
i fixed it boom! :D LOL
hahahaha baan
every1 loved the small penguin :D
soo keep that one :D
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
-
Yaa me to i wanna be one too
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
hahhahahahha :D LOL
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
love ur thinkin :D LOL
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
love ur thinkin :D LOL
]
zanzu bro ;) :D
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
love ur thinkin :D LOL
]
zanzu bro ;) :D
LOL :D.....when u become a mod, GO FOR IT! :P :D
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
-
ello beebz me waannna b a mod 2 :) ::) ::)
-
hey peeps, wt do u think about ma pic? :D LOL
-
hey peeps, wt do u think about ma pic? :D LOL
like i said ;)
-
its amazing sanity and +REP TO U BOOM for da joke lol
i know im like dreamin but i wanna b a mod as well
-
its amazing sanity and +REP TO U BOOM for da joke lol
i know im like dreamin but i wanna b a mod as well
thanx dude..or dudeee[girl] ;) ;) :D
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
THATS WT WE NEED! :P :D LOL
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
i am watching... ::) ::) ::) ::)
nothing is happening,...... ::) ::) ::)
i am still watching...........
ok..now it is getting boring!!! :P :P :P :P
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
i am watching... ::) ::) ::) ::)
nothing is happening,...... ::) ::) ::)
i am still watching...........
ok..now it is getting boring!!! :P :P :P :P
ur soo DUM!! stubid!!!!
i needa be MOD or ADMIN to have POSSESS POWER!!!
8) 8) 8) 8)
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
i am watching... ::) ::) ::) ::)
nothing is happening,...... ::) ::) ::)
i am still watching...........
ok..now it is getting boring!!! :P :P :P :P
she doesnt have the POWER yet :P :D LOL
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
i am watching... ::) ::) ::) ::)
nothing is happening,...... ::) ::) ::)
i am still watching...........
ok..now it is getting boring!!! :P :P :P :P
ur soo DUM!! stubid!!!!
i needa be MOD or ADMIN to have POSSESS POWER!!!
8) 8) 8) 8)
keep ON DREAMING!!!!!!
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
i am watching... ::) ::) ::) ::)
nothing is happening,...... ::) ::) ::)
i am still watching...........
ok..now it is getting boring!!! :P :P :P :P
ur soo DUM!! stubid!!!!
i needa be MOD or ADMIN to have POSSESS POWER!!!
8) 8) 8) 8)
keep ON DREAMING!!!!!!
dreams do come true.......when i first came on the forums, i dreamed of being and admin or mod.....and one day, BAAAM!!!
so keep dreamin banazz ;)
:P :P :P > boom :P :D
-
SANITY....ITS A DREAM-NEVER-CUM TRUE!!!!!!
if u want something u shouldnt dream.....its just a waste of time!!! :P :P :P :P :P
U HAV TO GO 4 IT!!!!
ASK!!!IT OUT!! :P :P :P :P :P
-
SANITY....ITS A DREAM-NEVER-CUM TRUE!!!!!!
if u want something u shouldnt dream.....its just a waste of time!!! :P :P :P :P :P
U HAV TO GO 4 IT!!!!
ASK!!!IT OUT!! :P :P :P :P :P
LOL.....i didnt go for it, but i got it :P ROFL
-
SANITY....ITS A DREAM-NEVER-CUM TRUE!!!!!!
if u want something u shouldnt dream.....its just a waste of time!!! :P :P :P :P :P
U HAV TO GO 4 IT!!!!
ASK!!!IT OUT!! :P :P :P :P :P
LOL.....i didnt go for it, but i got it :P ROFL
no.....U BEGGED 4 IT!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P
-
i swear i had deja-vu reading this last page .. & it continued till i began writing .. aahehehe
-
i swear i had deja-vu reading this last page .. & it continued till i began writing .. aahehehe
hahahahhaa......:D LOL
nice :) :D
-
i swear i had deja-vu reading this last page .. & it continued till i began writing .. aahehehe
hmm...i MADE LOADS OF OOL..LAUGH TODAY!!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
-
whats ool ??
-
whats ool ??
i meant ppl.......typing error :D
-
SANITY....ITS A DREAM-NEVER-CUM TRUE!!!!!!
if u want something u shouldnt dream.....its just a waste of time!!! :P :P :P :P :P
U HAV TO GO 4 IT!!!!
ASK!!!IT OUT!! :P :P :P :P :P
LOL.....i didnt go for it, but i got it :P ROFL
no.....U BEGGED 4 IT!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P
i dont beg 4 anything........no need, i prove ma self with ma actions :P :D
-
SANITY....ITS A DREAM-NEVER-CUM TRUE!!!!!!
if u want something u shouldnt dream.....its just a waste of time!!! :P :P :P :P :P
U HAV TO GO 4 IT!!!!
ASK!!!IT OUT!! :P :P :P :P :P
LOL.....i didnt go for it, but i got it :P ROFL
no.....U BEGGED 4 IT!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P
i dont beg 4 anything........no need, i prove ma self with ma actions :P :D
lol...u cant act on da forum...u can only type....by BEGGING!! ;D :P :P :P
-
i swear i had deja-vu reading this last page .. & it continued till i began writing .. aahehehe
hmm...i MADE LOADS OF OOL..LAUGH TODAY!!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
gd 4 u then
-
yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo YO!
wussup y'all!
-
yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo YO!
wussup y'all!
hey omer......how u doin? :D
-
yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo YO!
wussup y'all!
hey omer......how u doin? :D
am great dude, how bout u?
-
SANITY....ITS A DREAM-NEVER-CUM TRUE!!!!!!
if u want something u shouldnt dream.....its just a waste of time!!! :P :P :P :P :P
U HAV TO GO 4 IT!!!!
ASK!!!IT OUT!! :P :P :P :P :P
LOL.....i didnt go for it, but i got it :P ROFL
no.....U BEGGED 4 IT!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P
i dont beg 4 anything........no need, i prove ma self with ma actions :P :D
lol...u cant act on da forum...u can only type....by BEGGING!! ;D :P :P :P
well i can, by helping others and by being active :P :D :P
-
SANITY....ITS A DREAM-NEVER-CUM TRUE!!!!!!
if u want something u shouldnt dream.....its just a waste of time!!! :P :P :P :P :P
U HAV TO GO 4 IT!!!!
ASK!!!IT OUT!! :P :P :P :P :P
LOL.....i didnt go for it, but i got it :P ROFL
no.....U BEGGED 4 IT!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P
i dont beg 4 anything........no need, i prove ma self with ma actions :P :D
lol...u cant act on da forum...u can only type....by BEGGING!! ;D :P :P :P
well i can, by helping others and by being active :P :D :P
EVERYONE CAN DO THAT!!! :P :D :D :P :P
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
i am watching... ::) ::) ::) ::)
nothing is happening,...... ::) ::) ::)
i am still watching...........
ok..now it is getting boring!!! :P :P :P :P
ur soo DUM!! stubid!!!!
i needa be MOD or ADMIN to have POSSESS POWER!!!
8) 8) 8) 8)
keep ON DREAMING!!!!!!
dreams do come true.......when i first came on the forums, i dreamed of being and admin or mod.....and one day, BAAAM!!!
so keep dreamin banazz ;)
:P :P :P > boom :P :D
hehhe then i have to sleeeep alot :P
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
i am watching... ::) ::) ::) ::)
nothing is happening,...... ::) ::) ::)
i am still watching...........
ok..now it is getting boring!!! :P :P :P :P
ur soo DUM!! stubid!!!!
i needa be MOD or ADMIN to have POSSESS POWER!!!
8) 8) 8) 8)
keep ON DREAMING!!!!!!
dreams do come true.......when i first came on the forums, i dreamed of being and admin or mod.....and one day, BAAAM!!!
so keep dreamin banazz ;)
:P :P :P > boom :P :D
hehhe then i have to sleeeep alot :P
cant u daydream :P :P :D
-
hey..sanity......it cool da ban button!!!!
i wanna becum a mod..too!!!
DREAM ON! :P :P :D
jk, ask mr. Paul, maybe they will make new mods.....:D
yea....AND THEN I WILL BAN EVERYONE!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
dude if i bcom first thing ill do will BAN U!
>:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :P :P
i dare u too!!!! :P
ohh yaa watch me 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
i am watching... ::) ::) ::) ::)
nothing is happening,...... ::) ::) ::)
i am still watching...........
ok..now it is getting boring!!! :P :P :P :P
ur soo DUM!! stubid!!!!
i needa be MOD or ADMIN to have POSSESS POWER!!!
8) 8) 8) 8)
keep ON DREAMING!!!!!!
dreams do come true.......when i first came on the forums, i dreamed of being and admin or mod.....and one day, BAAAM!!!
so keep dreamin banazz ;)
:P :P :P > boom :P :D
hehhe then i have to sleeeep alot :P
cant u daydream :P :P :D
Mope:P with a random bran like mine u would b always intupted
hahahah
-
ANYONE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!
WANT SOME JOKES!!
-
ANYONE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!
WANT SOME JOKES!!
read the past few posts, they r funny :D :P :D lol
-
How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
-
How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
by asking u :P
since u're an EXPERT:P
-
How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
by asking u :P
since u're an EXPERT:P
yes..lll...but U guess..
-
By the way why r u banging ur head on the floor!?
are u gone insane?
SAniTy Boom Nedds ur help :P ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
-
By the way why r u banging ur head on the floor!?
are u gone insane?
SAniTy Boom Nedds ur help :P ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
well..mana..MY SKELETAL SYSTEM IS MADE OF ANDIMANSESIUM...AN UNDESTRUCTABLE ALLOY!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
so do r u jealous!!!!
I AM UN DESTRUCTIBLE :P :P :P :P......
-
By the way why r u banging ur head on the floor!?
are u gone insane?
SAniTy Boom Nedds ur help :P ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
well..mana..MY SKELETAL SYSTEM IS MADE OF ANDIMANSESIUM...AN UNDESTRUCTABLE ALLOY!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
so do r u jealous!!!!
I AM UN DESTRUCTIBLE :P :P :P :P......
HAHA SO URE NOT HUMAN HUH? 8) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
-
How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
by asking u :P
since u're an EXPERT:P
yes..lll...but U guess..
why would i guess???
not bothered
haha if anyone needs help i will tell them to contact u hahaha
-
How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
-
How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
would u answer or jus dwell my time ?
-
i read it somewhere before..........hmmm
give her a papers with "turn over" on both sides.....:D lol ??
-
i read it somewhere before..........hmmm
give her a papers with "turn over" on both sides.....:D lol ??
HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
-
i read it somewhere before..........hmmm
give her a papers with "turn over" on both sides.....:D lol ??
HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
r u amused bana? :P :D
-
i read it somewhere before..........hmmm
give her a papers with "turn over" on both sides.....:D lol ??
HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
r u amused bana? :P :D
why would i ana mafe Bolonde!! 8) :D ::)
me laughing oon how people assume they r brainless bebol :D :D :D :D :D :D :P :P
-
Doctor: You're in good health. You'll live to be 80.
Patient: But, doctor, I am 80 right now.
Doctor: See, what did I tell you!
just a joke...
-
Doctor: You're in good health. You'll live to be 80.
Patient: But, doctor, I am 80 right now.
Doctor: See, what did I tell you!
just a joke...
tch tfh tch
so mean i knew u wwre inhuman n now it prooves since u don't have sence of sypathy
tch tch tch
-
What is six inches long, two inches wide, has a head on it, and mana goes crazy for it?
-
What is six inches long, two inches wide, has a head on it, and mana goes crazy for it?
i do ???
i never knew that
dont make up stufff :D >:( >:( :P :P :P ::) ::) ::)
-
Doctor: You're in good health. You'll live to be 80.
Patient: But, doctor, I am 80 right now.
Doctor: See, what did I tell you!
just a joke...
tch tfh tch
so mean i knew u wwre inhuman n now it prooves since u don't have sence of sypathy
tch tch tch
I AM A GOD-GIFTED HUMAN.... :P :P :P :P 8) 8) 8) 8)
wr else ur ordinary!!!
-
Anyways M eoff now
Allahahfiz
MA3salama
Take care
-
Anyways M eoff now
Allahahfiz
MA3salama
Take care
im off too.....Take care
-
What is six inches long, two inches wide, has a head on it, and mana goes crazy for it?
-
What is six inches long, two inches wide, has a head on it, and mana goes crazy for it?
thought about final answering before i go :D lol
money? :D
-
What is six inches long, two inches wide, has a head on it, and mana goes crazy for it?
thought about final answering before i go :D lol
money? :D
loll money nyc 1... :D
mm.. me have no idea :-\
-
it is money lol
cuz u know the america dollar???
-
it is money lol
cuz u know the america dollar???
YEAA......but sanity cheated..he googled it!!
>:( >:( >:(
-
it is money lol
cuz u know the america dollar???
YEAA......but sanity cheated..he googled it!!
>:( >:( >:(
no i didnt, most of these jokes/riddles i've read them before, i wont ruin the fun again........if i know it, i will just keep laughing :D
-
snitty u bback ;D
-
snitty u bback ;D
yea m back :D lol
-
snitty u bback ;D
yea m back :D lol
well then do me a favour n answer those random questionz which i asked pleaassee ;D ;D ;D :D
-
snitty u bback ;D
yea m back :D lol
well then do me a favour n answer those random questionz which i asked pleaassee ;D ;D ;D :D
lol, kk......:D
-
snitty u bback ;D
yea m back :D lol
well then do me a favour n answer those random questionz which i asked pleaassee ;D ;D ;D :D
lol, kk......:D
wt Qs? :D lol
-
da one in the random questoionz thread :D ;)
-
da one in the random questoionz thread :D ;)
aha,, i see......i entered that thread many times, but didnt have time to answer :D lol
-
da one in the random questoionz thread :D ;)
aha,, i see......i entered that thread many times, but didnt have time to answer :D lol
lol answer minnee pleeasee :D :D ;D
-
da one in the random questoionz thread :D ;)
aha,, i see......i entered that thread many times, but didnt have time to answer :D lol
lol answer minnee pleeasee :D :D ;D
i did :)
-
where did every1 go......?
-
where did every1 go......?
me here... chatroom :)
-
where did every1 go......?
me here... chatroom :)
kk, meet u there ;)
wt did u think about the answers......:D
-
where did every1 go......?
me here... chatroom :)
kk, meet u there ;)
wt did u think about the answers......:D
lol met u there :P
nd ya nyc answerzz lllooll
-
snitty whered u goo frn the chat room !!??? ::)
-
snitty whered u goo frn the chat room !!??? ::)
got bored......wt do u think about ma pic and the msg under it :D LOL
-
snitty whered u goo frn the chat room !!??? ::)
got bored......wt do u think about ma pic and the msg under it :D LOL
ahahahhahaha lmaaoo nyc picc ahahhahahahaha poor baby.. :(
:D :D :D soo sup !!?
-
snitty whered u goo frn the chat room !!??? ::)
got bored......wt do u think about ma pic and the msg under it :D LOL
ahahahhahaha lmaaoo nyc picc ahahhahahahaha poor baby.. :(
:D :D :D soo sup !!?
not much :D lol
-
snitty whered u goo frn the chat room !!??? ::)
got bored......wt do u think about ma pic and the msg under it :D LOL
that baby will contact u!!! :P :P
-
snitty whered u goo frn the chat room !!??? ::)
got bored......wt do u think about ma pic and the msg under it :D LOL
that baby will contact u!!! :P :P
no thnk u i dnt talk to bad babies :D
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
-
snitty whered u goo frn the chat room !!??? ::)
got bored......wt do u think about ma pic and the msg under it :D LOL
that baby will contact u!!! :P :P
no thnk u i dnt talk to bad babies :D
lol, i will put up a new photo every day...so tomorrow, a new funny one, and boom, dont put the pix i have in mind :D lol
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
hmm so does my head :D lol letz 4get it couz.. letz doo sumthin new... like ... ::)
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
Imagine our Generation vistion Phycosologist
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
Imagine our Generation vistion Phycosologist
o0o0o0hh LOL :D
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
Imagine our Generation vistion Phycosologist
hahahahahhahhaha, XD LOL
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
Imagine our Generation vistion Phycosologist
hahahahahhahhaha, XD LOL
was that sarcasm :-\
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
Imagine our Generation vistion Phycosologist
was that sarcasm :-\
hahahahahhahhaha, XD LOL
hmm.. nt me sarcasming..
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
Imagine our Generation vistion Phycosologist
hahahahahhahhaha, XD LOL
was that sarcasm :-\
nothing, we r just hyper :D
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
Imagine our Generation vistion Phycosologist
hahahahahhahhaha, XD LOL
was that sarcasm :-\
nothing, we r just hyper :D
ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm :-\
-
snitty shall v continue quoting ? ::) ::) ;D :D :P :P
as u wish :D lol,,,,,but i started to get dizzy when i scroll :D lol
Imagine our Generation vistion Phycosologist
hahahahahhahhaha, XD LOL
was that sarcasm :-\
nothing, we r just hyper :D
i amm
-
WHERE R U SNITTYY ND MANNZZZ :( :(
-
WHERE R U SNITTYY ND MANNZZZ :( :(
sry, i was away
-
WHERE R U SNITTYY ND MANNZZZ :( :(
sry, i was away
itz okay
-
WHERE R U SNITTYY ND MANNZZZ :( :(
sry, i was away
itz okay
i know it is :P :P :D LOL
-
WHERE R U SNITTYY ND MANNZZZ :( :(
sry, i was away
itz okay
i know it is :P :P :D LOL
ya ryt... >:( >:( :o 8) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) :P :D
-
got a riddle
A boy was at a carnival and went to a booth where a man said to the boy, "If I write your exact weight on this piece of paper then you have to give me $50, but if I cannot, I will pay you $50."
The boy looked around and saw no scale so he agrees, thinking no matter what the carny writes he'll just say he weighs more or less.
In the end the boy ended up paying the man $50. How did the man win the bet?
-
got a riddle
A boy was at a carnival and went to a booth where a man said to the boy, "If I write your exact weight on this piece of paper then you have to give me $50, but if I cannot, I will pay you $50."
The boy looked around and saw no scale so he agrees, thinking no matter what the carny writes he'll just say he weighs more or less.
In the end the boy ended up paying the man $50. How did the man win the bet?
i've heard it buh i dont remember :( :(
-
i remember know... :)
He wrote..."your exact weight" on the paper...
ahahahahhahaha lol :D ;D
-
YEAH THTS RIGHT
UR SMART LOL ;D
-
YEAH THTS RIGHT
UR SMART LOL ;D
lol itz jus tht ive heard it soo.. u know ::) ::) ::) :P
-
woooooooo..This thread is soooo much dead!! me shocked :P
-
ive just realised that i used to spend most of my time on this thread during the exams ... this thread took me through the painfull journey of IGs ... thanks Mony for making it ;) :P
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ive just realised that i used to spend most of my time on this thread during the exams ... this thread took me through the painfull journey of IGs ... thanks Mony for making it ;) :P
awwww dear brother..yea me too..i remember how we used all to spend our time on it..with abdo, sanity, zero, al-eagle, kam, n u..it wass reallyyyy fun!!
i am missin those days :(
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ive just realised that i used to spend most of my time on this thread during the exams ... this thread took me through the painfull journey of IGs ... thanks Mony for making it ;) :P
awwww dear brother..yea me too..i remember how we used all to spend our time on it..with abdo, sanity, zero, al-eagle, kam, n u..it wass reallyyyy fun!!
i am missin those days :(
yeah me too
they helped me ease the tension that came along with the IGs
hiii monyy wassup? ;D
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HEYYY KAM!! ezik??!!
nuthin much..checkin posts..we ba7oot el salt n pepper fel mala7a..i don't know if u know it.. ;D
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HEYYY KAM!! ezik??!!
nuthin much..checkin posts..we ba7oot el salt n pepper fel mala7a..i don't know if u know it.. ;D
llloolllllll
im alright, ezik inty/??
soo umm is there a particular reason for doin that or just for the fun of it?
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HEYYY KAM!! ezik??!!
nuthin much..checkin posts..we ba7oot el salt n pepper fel mala7a..i don't know if u know it.. ;D
llloolllllll
im alright, ezik inty/??
soo umm is there a particular reason for doin that or just for the fun of it?
haha..no my sister came and told me.."7OTI DOOL FEL MALA7A"...fa i couldnt say anythin..i kept it :-X
becuz she is my older sister..n she is doin everything..n i do stuff.but not like her.. ;D
and i am great elhamdolilah!!
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HEYYY KAM!! ezik??!!
nuthin much..checkin posts..we ba7oot el salt n pepper fel mala7a..i don't know if u know it.. ;D
llloolllllll
im alright, ezik inty/??
soo umm is there a particular reason for doin that or just for the fun of it?
haha..no my sister came and told me.."7OTI DOOL FEL MALA7A"...fa i couldnt say anythin..i kept it :-X
becuz she is my older sister..n she is doin everything..n i do stuff.but not like her.. ;D
and i am great elhamdolilah!!
hahaaa
hmm lucky u have anolder sis
im the oldestt
i hate being the oldest
allhamdullullah ur fine
so is egypt hot?
and r u goin sumwhere cool?
ive been to egypt once
it was great and i luved the mishaltet it was awesome
in kuwait, they dont do it as good as in egypt.
i can almost taste it noww ;D
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Eda begad??!!! ro7ti maser!! emta?? konti young ya3ni wala old??
and i have a younger brother who still annoys me ;D
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haha yeah ive been there
hmmm i was about 4 i think
but i will never forget that mishaltet
AMAZINGG
where did u goo???
oh welll
tcc
salam :-*
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haha yeah ive been there
hmmm i was about 4 i think
but i will never forget that mishaltet
AMAZINGG
where did u goo???
oh welll
tcc
salam :-*
omg, loooool ..
u knw the mishaltet ?? i looooove it.lol
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Eda begad??!!! ro7ti maser!! emta?? konti young ya3ni wala old??
and i have a younger brother who still annoys me ;D
Y...is he naughty......if he is.......WAT DID HE BREAK!!?? 8) 8) 8)
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mahia ra7et maser!! :D :D :D
hey E_T enti moshtarika fi ai nadi fi maser??
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Eda begad??!!! ro7ti maser!! emta?? konti young ya3ni wala old??
and i have a younger brother who still annoys me ;D
Y...is he naughty......if he is.......WAT DID HE BREAK!!?? 8) 8) 8)
well he is kind off..in the morning he broke an egg on the floor..i swear..and i was even chattin with manah..and i had to clean it..becuz if not it make a very bad smell..i am always responsible for him :'(
but today in the club we played FOOTBALL!! IT WAS COOOOOOOOOL!! 8)
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ok...mony..and et..i hav got a RIDDLE CUM JOKE!!!
SO HERE IT IS:What did the salad say when the cabbage interrupted their meal?
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mahia ra7et maser!! :D :D :D
hey E_T enti moshtarika fi ai nadi fi maser??
ahehehehe .. no, dude, i told u be4 .. i think ..
am nt that tyoe of gal .. bt am planning to join one n when i get there ..
i have one n front of our apartment ..
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Eda begad??!!! ro7ti maser!! emta?? konti young ya3ni wala old??
and i have a younger brother who still annoys me ;D
Y...is he naughty......if he is.......WAT DID HE BREAK!!?? 8) 8) 8)
well he is kind off..in the morning he broke an egg on the floor..i swear..and i was even chattin with manah..and i had to clean it..becuz if not it make a very bad smell..i am always responsible for him :'(
but today in the club we played FOOTBALL!! IT WAS COOOOOOOOOL!! 8)
hmm..ok..aftr all ur his elder sis...ur mom's surely got a relief!!!!
u hav to take care of him now!!!!
:o :o :o :o
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la2 E_T!! dont get me wrong..haha..ana baroo7 ma3 kol el 3ala..ya3ni mama..we baba..we my sis we keda...
ana fi nadi el shames.. ;D
and Boom..umm..the cabbage said..Wats up?? :-[
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la2 E_T!! dont get me wrong..haha..ana baroo7 ma3 kol el 3ala..ya3ni mama..we baba..we my sis we keda...
ana fi nadi el shames.. ;D
and Boom..umm..the cabbage said..Wats up?? :-[
no...da cabbage interrupted...so it will not be saying wats up........U HAV TO GUESS..CUMMON...U CAN DO IT!!
AND HERE IS ANOTHER ONE!!:::What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
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Eda begad??!!! ro7ti maser!! emta?? konti young ya3ni wala old??
and i have a younger brother who still annoys me ;D
Y...is he naughty......if he is.......WAT DID HE BREAK!!?? 8) 8) 8)
well he is kind off..in the morning he broke an egg on the floor..i swear..and i was even chattin with manah..and i had to clean it..becuz if not it make a very bad smell..i am always responsible for him :'(
but today in the club we played FOOTBALL!! IT WAS COOOOOOOOOL!! 8)
hmm..ok..aftr all ur his elder sis...ur mom's surely got a relief!!!!
u hav to take care of him now!!!!
:o :o :o :o
its not like i am 100% responsible..my mom n my dad too..but becuz my elder sis is away in university in Egypt..i am his only sis left..so he sticks to me in eveythin ;D so like i do stuff for all the house not only him.. :-\
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ok...mony..and et..i hav got a RIDDLE CUM JOKE!!!
SO HERE IT IS:What did the salad say when the cabbage interrupted their meal?
umm .. hve no idea ..
i already told u am nt that type of a riddlez person ;D
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la2 E_T!! dont get me wrong..haha..ana baroo7 ma3 kol el 3ala..ya3ni mama..we baba..we my sis we keda...
ana fi nadi el shames.. ;D
and Boom..umm..the cabbage said..Wats up?? :-[
no...da cabbage interrupted...so it will not be saying wats up........U HAV TO GUESS..CUMMON...U CAN DO IT!!
AND HERE IS ANOTHER ONE!!:::What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
mmmmmmmmmmmmmm "Leave a place for me"..hahaha :P i don't know lol!!
a snowman n a vampire?? freezin vampire?? :-\
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ok...mony..and et..i hav got a RIDDLE CUM JOKE!!!
SO HERE IT IS:What did the salad say when the cabbage interrupted their meal?
umm .. hve no idea ..
i already told u am nt that type of a riddlez person ;D
cummon..E_T....
at least try.....!!!
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la2 E_T!! dont get me wrong..haha..ana baroo7 ma3 kol el 3ala..ya3ni mama..we baba..we my sis we keda...
ana fi nadi el shames.. ;D
and Boom..umm..the cabbage said..Wats up?? :-[
no...da cabbage interrupted...so it will not be saying wats up........U HAV TO GUESS..CUMMON...U CAN DO IT!!
AND HERE IS ANOTHER ONE!!:::What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
mmmmmmmmmmmmmm "Leave a place for me"..hahaha :P i don't know lol!!
a snowman n a vampire?? freezin vampire?? :-\
lol...mony..i hav to say this BUT UR REALLY POOR AT GUSSIN!!!
I AM NOW WAITING 4 ET!!!!
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it said 'we didnt call 4 a cab ?? '
k, me now jst trynna be funny .. i seriously dunno .. ahehehe
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What did the salad say when the cabbage interrupted their meal?
da ans is:
lettuce alone!!!!!
and u guess 4 da other one
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What did the salad say when the cabbage interrupted their meal?
da ans is:
lettuce alone!!!!!
and u guess 4 da other one
ahahahahahahahhahahahahaha .. this is soooooo lame, bt am cracking up .. lol
the other one ?? i cant guess nymore
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What did the salad say when the cabbage interrupted their meal?
da ans is:
lettuce alone!!!!!
and u guess 4 da other one
ahahahahahahahhahahahahaha .. this is soooooo lame, bt am cracking up .. lol
the other one ?? i cant guess nymore
it is indeed....... ;D ;D ;D
but YET..ITS FUNNY!!!!!
AND4 THIS:What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
DA ANS IS frost-bite!!!!
this IS AWESOME!!
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hahaha..i liked the first one..it was really funny..HAHAHAHA..HAHAHAHA...
ok Boom n E_T..i got some..u wanna???? they r easy but nice..if u want me to post them tell me ;D
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hahaha..i liked the first one..it was really funny..HAHAHAHA..HAHAHAHA...
ok Boom n E_T..i got some..u wanna???? they r easy but nice..if u want me to post them tell me ;D
yeah, post post .. :)
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hahaha..i liked the first one..it was really funny..HAHAHAHA..HAHAHAHA...
ok Boom n E_T..i got some..u wanna???? they r easy but nice..if u want me to post them tell me ;D
sure!!!
AND HERE IS A BAD YET FUNNY JOKE!!!!
One day,little Timmy was at school and heard the word "sh*t". He went home and asked his dad for the
definition and he promptly told him "coats and jackets".
Timmy went to school the next day and heard the word "*censored*", and for a second time, asked his father what
it meant. His father promptly said "cooking".
Then,he returned to school the third day and heard the words "bitches and hoes". He went home and his father
told him it meant "grandpa and grandma".
Later,on Thanksgiving night,his grandparents came over.
Timmy answered the door with glee and says...
"Hey bitches and hoes! I'll take your sh*t to the closet cause dad's in the kitchen *censored* the turkey!
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hahaha..i liked the first one..it was really funny..HAHAHAHA..HAHAHAHA...
ok Boom n E_T..i got some..u wanna???? they r easy but nice..if u want me to post them tell me ;D
sure!!!
AND HERE IS A BAD YET FUNNY JOKE!!!!
One day,little Timmy was at school and heard the word "sh*t". He went home and asked his dad for the
definition and he promptly told him "coats and jackets".
Timmy went to school the next day and heard the word "f*cking", and for a second time, asked his father what
it meant. His father promptly said "cooking".
Then,he returned to school the third day and heard the words "b*tches and hoes". He went home and his father
told him it meant "grandpa and grandma".
Later,on Thanksgiving night,his grandparents came over.
Timmy answered the door with glee and says...
"Hey b*tches and hoes! I'll take your sh*t to the closet cause dad's in the kitchen f*cking the turkey!
lol.. i heard this like a gazillion times be4 n various versions !
;D
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HERE IS AN AWESOME...YEAT A FUNNY JOKE!!!
There was an old man in a bar who was staring at a punk in the corner. The punk had multicolored, spiked hair
and multicolored feather earings.
After a while the punk got mad and said to the old man "What are you staring at?"
"Back when I was in the army I got really drunk one night and fucked a parrot.
I was wondering if you were my son."
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hahahaha...these r soooooooooo funny!! especially the first one!! hahaha...
ok here is a riddle..What English word is nine letters long, and can remain an English word at each step as you remove one letter at a time, right down to a single letter. List the letter you remove each time and the words that result at each step.
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hahahaha...these r soooooooooo funny!! especially the first one!! hahaha...
ok here is a riddle..What English word is nine letters long, and can remain an English word at each step as you remove one letter at a time, right down to a single letter. List the letter you remove each time and the words that result at each step.
this is really a difficult one!!!
i heard it be4......its something......like....startling..or starting..yea..
i think it is this one!!
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HERE IS AN AWESOME...YEAT A FUNNY JOKE!!!
There was an old man in a bar who was staring at a punk in the corner. The punk had multicolored, spiked hair
and multicolored feather earings.
After a while the punk got mad and said to the old man "What are you staring at?"
"Back when I was in the army I got really drunk one night and f*cked a parrot.
I was wondering if you were my son."
wow .. he musta been really wasted ..
bt, loooool .. 'i was wondering if u were my son' ..
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OK BOOOOOM U GOT IT RIGHT!!!! +rep for u(that is wat we used to do b4) but now..no +reps :(
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OK BOOOOOM U GOT IT RIGHT!!!! +rep for u(that is wat we used to do b4) but now..no +reps :(
heeeeeeey .. he knew it 4rm be4 .. lool
yeah, i'm kinda disliking the new system .. other one was much easier !!
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WTH do u mean no +reps, this system is much better and much more logical than before, now you have to explain what your +/- repping a person for
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i don't know....this one is still not workin properly..i still liked the other one though,,but then we will see after this one gets fixed :D
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i don't know....this one is still not workin properly..i still liked the other one though,,but then we will see after this one gets fixed :D
whats wrong with it ??? I don't see any problem, I + repped you right now without any error
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am still insisting that the other one is better !
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i don't know....this one is still not workin properly..i still liked the other one though,,but then we will see after this one gets fixed :D
whats wrong with it ??? I don't see any problem, I + repped you right now without any error
HAHA U DID??!! thx..but Omer n Q80 did also..and stll my reps r 0 ;D
so its not workin :P
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i don't know....this one is still not workin properly..i still liked the other one though,,but then we will see after this one gets fixed :D
whats wrong with it ??? I don't see any problem, I + repped you right now without any error
HAHA U DID??!! thx..but Omer n Q80 did also..and stll my reps r 0 ;D
so its not workin :P
MANa IS trying
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i don't know....this one is still not workin properly..i still liked the other one though,,but then we will see after this one gets fixed :D
whats wrong with it ??? I don't see any problem, I + repped you right now without any error
HAHA U DID??!! thx..but Omer n Q80 did also..and stll my reps r 0 ;D
so its not workin :P
MANa IS trying
DONT LIE..CUZ U ARENT!!! :P :P
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i don't know....this one is still not workin properly..i still liked the other one though,,but then we will see after this one gets fixed :D
whats wrong with it ??? I don't see any problem, I + repped you right now without any error
HAHA U DID??!! thx..but Omer n Q80 did also..and stll my reps r 0 ;D
so its not workin :P
MANa IS trying
DONT LIE..CUZ U ARENT!!! :P :P
IW AS BUT I HAD THIS ERROR I WAN UNABLE TO GIVE REPS CUZ I GAVE ZARA ONE IN A HALF AN HOUR AGO!!!
BUT THATS ANOTHER ISSUE THAT IT DDINT WORKED :-\ :-\
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awww thx Sweety..anyway i got 1..i don't know how...i hope its gonna be fixed soooon inshallah :-*
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i am so full of jokes ryte now!!!!!!!
wanna hav some......
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i am so full of jokes ryte now!!!!!!!
wanna hav some......
QUICKKKKKKKK 4 mins left!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :'(
ill go search for it..and u post!!
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i am so full of jokes ryte now!!!!!!!
wanna hav some......
QUICKKKKKKKK 4 mins left!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :'(
ill go search for it..and u post!!
Be right back..aftr prayer.........
and CAUTION:R U MENTALLY STRONG ENOUGH TO WITHSTAND MY JOKE!!!
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i am so full of jokes ryte now!!!!!!!
wanna hav some......
QUICKKKKKKKK 4 mins left!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :'(
ill go search for it..and u post!!
Be right back..aftr prayer.........
and CAUTION:R U MENTALLY STRONG ENOUGH TO WITHSTAND MY JOKE!!!
TYT...yea i am strong to withstand anyyyy joke!! :P
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i really wanna post jokes but they r offencive n Racist despite i dont wanna be 1
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i am so full of jokes ryte now!!!!!!!
wanna hav some......
QUICKKKKKKKK 4 mins left!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :'(
ill go search for it..and u post!!
Be right back..aftr prayer.........
and CAUTION:R U MENTALLY STRONG ENOUGH TO WITHSTAND MY JOKE!!!
TYT...yea i am strong to withstand anyyyy joke!! :P
so should i post one!
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Ya Go On
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i really wanna post jokes but they r offencive n Racist despite i dont wanna be 1
Hey no u can post Sweety..its ok :D
n Boom yea post..ill check em later becuz i gtg...but post :D
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this is another joke cum riddle:
Why did the fish Blush?
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this is another joke cum riddle:
Why did the fish Blush?
ummmmm .. ( & i dont think that the answer is comming after that 'umm')
-
What do you get when a cow gets stuck in an Earth quake?
THIS IS DA EASIEST ONE!!!
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this is another joke cum riddle:
Why did the fish Blush?
ummmmm .. ( & i dont think that the answer is comming after that 'umm')
a moooake
and hmm
the fish blushed cuzz hmmm it peed?
By the way is dat the right spelling??
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this is another joke cum riddle:
Why did the fish Blush?
ummmmm .. ( & i dont think that the answer is comming after that 'umm')
a moooake
and hmm
the fish blushed cuzz hmmm it peed?
By the way is dat the right spelling??
yea..its da right spelling............and do u noe wts blushing
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What do you get when a cow gets stuck in an Earth quake?
THIS IS DA EASIEST ONE!!!
milkshake ??
-
nope i don't know whats blushin!!??
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What do you get when a cow gets stuck in an Earth quake?
THIS IS DA EASIEST ONE!!!
milkshake ??
BRAVO....!!!
FINALLY U DID IT ET!!!
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nope i don't know whats blushin!!??
u knw how lama te5galy ur face goes red ??
ahehehhe .. thats blushing ,, couldnt describe it better :P
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What do you get when a cow gets stuck in an Earth quake?
THIS IS DA EASIEST ONE!!!
milkshake ??
BRAVO....!!!
FINALLY U DID IT ET!!!
omg .. looooooooooooooool ..
I DID IT .. i would like to thank u boom 4 encourging me to finally solve one ..
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this is another joke cum riddle:
Why did the fish Blush?
ummmmm .. ( & i dont think that the answer is comming after that 'umm')
da ans is: BECAUSE IT SAW DA OCEAN'S BOTTOM!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
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What do you get when a cow gets stuck in an Earth quake?
THIS IS DA EASIEST ONE!!!
milkshake ??
BRAVO....!!!
FINALLY U DID IT ET!!!
omg .. looooooooooooooool ..
I DID IT .. i would like to thank u boom 4 encourging me to finally solve one ..
UR WELcome............ :) :-*
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nope i don't know whats blushin!!??
u knw how lama te5galy ur face goes red ??
ahehehhe .. thats blushing ,, couldnt describe it better :P
oh was tht what boom meant??
lol i know what blushin is!! ;D
funny cuz it saw the oceans bottom loll
hii ET missed ya so!!! :-*
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this is another joke cum riddle:
Why did the fish Blush?
ummmmm .. ( & i dont think that the answer is comming after that 'umm')
da ans is: BECAUSE IT SAW DA OCEAN'S BOTTOM!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
alooooooooooooooool .. i actually laughed out loud ..
hmm, nice one ..
c'mmon, since i did one .. post more ;D
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this is another joke cum riddle:
Why did the fish Blush?
ummmmm .. ( & i dont think that the answer is comming after that 'umm')
da ans is: BECAUSE IT SAW DA OCEAN'S BOTTOM!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
alooooooooooooooool .. i actually laughed out loud ..
hmm, nice one ..
c'mmon, since i did one .. post more ;D
ok....i am glad....
and i will post..let me think!!
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nope i don't know whats blushin!!??
u knw how lama te5galy ur face goes red ??
ahehehhe .. thats blushing ,, couldnt describe it better :P
oh was tht what boom meant??
lol i know what blushin is!! ;D
funny cuz it saw the oceans bottom loll
hii ET missed ya so!!! :-*
ahehehe .. i knew that u knew whats 'blushing', bas i thought maybe u were confused or sth ..
i MISS U MORE !! :-* :-* :-*
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nope i don't know whats blushin!!??
u knw how lama te5galy ur face goes red ??
ahehehhe .. thats blushing ,, couldnt describe it better :P
oh was tht what boom meant??
lol i know what blushin is!! ;D
funny cuz it saw the oceans bottom loll
hii ET missed ya so!!! :-*
ahehehe .. i knew that u knew whats 'blushing', bas i thought maybe u were confused or sth ..
i MISS U MORE !! :-* :-* :-*
:-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
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i hav another one..and its abt gilrz..but it is like not good..so
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i hav another one..and its abt gilrz..but it is like not good..so
im waitin ;D
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U WILL BE SHY TO ANS.............SO SHALL I..OR LEAVE IT???
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U WILL BE SHY TO ANS.............SO SHALL I..OR LEAVE IT???
i think am fine ..
dunno bout kam though ..
& boom how bad could it be ?? if its really bad, maybe u should skip it, cuz its on a forum ..
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ET U WONT BE ABLE TO GUESS.......I AM SURE....WELL NOT THAT BAD..
OK...SHOULD I POST HOROSCOPE OF FARTS!!! ;D ;D
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ET U WONT BE ABLE TO GUESS.......I AM SURE....WELL NOT THAT BAD..
OK...SHOULD I POST HOROSCOPE OF FARTS!!! ;D ;D
well i know nth of horscopes .. so, ;D .. lol
dont u have nything else ..
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HOROSCOPE OF FARTS!!
these r not riddles..................
theyr just to enjoy readin....let me post!!! a few..tell me if lyke them
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HOROSCOPE OF FARTS!!
1-AMBITIOUS - Always ready for a fart.
2-LAZY - Just fizzles
3-AMIABLE - Likes to smell others farts
4-SELFISH - Only enjoys smelling own farts
5-CARELESS - Farts in church
6-SMART ALEC - Farts when ladies are present.
7-CLEVER - Farts and coughs at same time
8-SCIENTIFIC - Bottles own farts
9-STINGY - Belches instead of farting to save a**hole
10-FOOLISH - Farts and laughs.
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HOROSCOPE OF FARTS!!
these r not riddles..................
theyr just to enjoy readin....let me post!!! a few..tell me if lyke them
where did kam diasappear ??
KAAAAAAAAAAAAM !!
& boooom .. loooooooooooooool
selfish - only enjoys smelling own farts . ahehehehe
they're funny !
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okiee
and thats a joke??
loll tht was disgusting
and a horoscope tooo??
ewww
it made me laugh thoo
haha thx boom ;D
im right here Et darlin :-*
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okiee
and thats a joke??
loll tht was disgusting
and a horoscope tooo??
ewww
it made me laugh thoo
haha thx boom ;D
im right here Et darlin :-*
ahehehe .. ofc its disgusting ..
wi meen ili fady ili ye23od wi ye3mel il 7ekaya di .. u knw ? loool
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okiee
and thats a joke??
loll tht was disgusting
and a horoscope tooo??
ewww
it made me laugh thoo
haha thx boom ;D
im right here Et darlin :-*
ahehehe .. ofc its disgusting ..
wi meen ili fady ili ye23od wi ye3mel il 7ekaya di .. u knw ? loool
lolll i know rightt!!!
so um can u teavh me about this new rep thingy?
do i just click the heart or what?
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okiee
and thats a joke??
loll tht was disgusting
and a horoscope tooo??
ewww
it made me laugh thoo
haha thx boom ;D
im right here Et darlin :-*
ahehehe .. ofc its disgusting ..
wi meen ili fady ili ye23od wi ye3mel il 7ekaya di .. u knw ? loool
lolll i know rightt!!!
so um can u teavh me about this new rep thingy?
do i just click the heart or what?
cuz ur still 0 to me ???
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okiee
and thats a joke??
loll tht was disgusting
and a horoscope tooo??
ewww
it made me laugh thoo
haha thx boom ;D
im right here Et darlin :-*
ahehehe .. ofc its disgusting ..
wi meen ili fady ili ye23od wi ye3mel il 7ekaya di .. u knw ? loool
lolll i know rightt!!!
so um can u teavh me about this new rep thingy?
do i just click the heart or what?
cuz ur still 0 to me ???
i have noooooooooooo idea .. lool
yeah, i tried too .. bt, its nt working ..
it seems like mana knw how ..
bt she isnt on :(
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oh hii
ur back
we were waiting for yaa!!
go to famillyy ;D
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Hey!! where is everyone???????????????????????????????!!!
any Jokes..or riddles?? :(
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Hey!! where is everyone???????????????????????????????!!!
any Jokes..or riddles?? :(
wth...scrll back few pages back
i am tired of posting!!!jokes and riddles!!
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Hey!! where is everyone???????????????????????????????!!!
any Jokes..or riddles?? :(
wth...scrll back few pages back
i am tired of posting!!!jokes and riddles!!
ukhhh man..i am lazy..cant flip back :-[
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Hey!! where is everyone???????????????????????????????!!!
any Jokes..or riddles?? :(
wth...scrll back few pages back
i am tired of posting!!!jokes and riddles!!
ukhhh man..i am lazy..cant flip back :-[
YYYY >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(
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Hey!! where is everyone???????????????????????????????!!!
any Jokes..or riddles?? :(
wth...scrll back few pages back
i am tired of posting!!!jokes and riddles!!
ukhhh man..i am lazy..cant flip back :-[
YYYY >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(
ok maybe later :P u bring them here :P :P :P
ok kiddin..ill check em now :D
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Hey!! where is everyone???????????????????????????????!!!
any Jokes..or riddles?? :(
wth...scrll back few pages back
i am tired of posting!!!jokes and riddles!!
ukhhh man..i am lazy..cant flip back :-[
YYYY >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(
ok maybe later :P u bring them here :P :P :P
ok kiddin..ill check em now :D
::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
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dude..WTF!! u tired of postin jokes n riddles??!! i saw only 3 or sumthin..lol...i remember when we all used to use this thread..we used to use it..we stayed for like 2-3 hrs postin jokes n riddles...haha..U R LAZY!!
ok kiddin...they were gooood...ill post some later :P
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dude..WTF!! u tired of postin jokes n riddles??!! i saw only 3 or sumthin..lol...i remember when we all used to use this thread..we used to use it..we stayed for like 2-3 hrs postin jokes n riddles...haha..U R LAZY!!
ok kiddin...they were gooood...ill post some later :P
screw u!!!!
THERE WAS NO ONE HERE EXCEPT KAM AND ET..SO i didnt post much!!! cuz.of less audience!!!!!!!
ur an egocentric person!!!!! >:( >:( >:(
i wont be posting now!!! >:( >:( >:( >:(
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ok that was rudeeee...me not likin the way u speak >:(
ok fine dont post..khalas..i dont need anything from u :'( :'( :'(
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ok that was rudeeee...me not likin the way u speak >:(
ok fine dont post..khalas..i dont need anything from u :'( :'( :'(
r u sure... :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :o :o :o :o
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ok that was rudeeee...me not likin the way u speak >:(
ok fine dont post..khalas..i dont need anything from u :'( :'( :'(
me also dont like da way u speak!!! :-[ :( :( :(
OK..KHALAS!!!
MA3'ASALAMA
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ok i was tellin u the truth..lol...
Boom u r really really weird..I CANT UNDERSTAND U AT ALL.................................................
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*awkward* LALALALALALA WHAT SONG WAS THAT!!! WOW LOOK FLYING BROCCOLI!!!! OOOPS SORRY IRAN OVER YOUR DOG!!! SORRY IRAQ OVER YOUR CAT!!!!!!
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*awkward* LALALALALALA WHAT SONG WAS THAT!!! WOW LOOK FLYING BROCCOLI!!!! OOOPS SORRY IRAN OVER YOUR DOG!!! SORRY IRAQ OVER YOUR CAT!!!!!!
hahaha..u know..ur a very nice person..u always post in this thread :D Thx mate :D :D
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JOKE HEA PEEPS!!! NJOY..LOLL
An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.
The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"
The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"
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zara.. lol thiz is repeated :) ::) ::) ::) ::)
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zara.. lol thiz is repeated :) ::) ::) ::) ::)
realli??!!
well i didnt knew...neways..imma post mor if i find ne... ;D
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zara.. lol thiz is repeated :) ::) ::) ::) ::)
realli??!!
well i didnt knew...neways..imma post mor if i find ne... ;D
lol..
ya..
okie :D
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I will post riddles now..ok??!!
easy and very nice ones :D
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okie :)
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ok here is an easy riddle:
I have three letters, and I read the same forward and backwards. I rhyme with a word that is important to everyone. What word am I?
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ok here is an easy riddle:
I have three letters, and I read the same forward and backwards. I rhyme with a word that is important to everyone. What word am I?
eye
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lol...its repeated By the way
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haha..U GOT IT RIGHT!! i know it is..but i guess u werent there when i posted it... anyway here is another one..bit difficult...
My life can be measured in hours,
I serve by being devoured.
Thin, I am quick
Fat, I am slow
Wind is my foe.
What am I?
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haha..U GOT IT RIGHT!! i know it is..but i guess u werent there when i posted it... anyway here is another one..bit difficult...
My life can be measured in hours,
I serve by being devoured.
Thin, I am quick
Fat, I am slow
Wind is my foe.
What am I?
even this is repeated.....
n the ans is candle...loll
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ukhhh >:( ..lol..
but i dont remember u being there when i posted em..but its ok..ill post another :P
You can take away the whole and still have some left. You can take away some and still have the whole left. What is it?
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ukhhh >:( ..lol..
but i dont remember u being there when i posted em..but its ok..ill post another :P
You can take away the whole and still have some left. You can take away some and still have the whole left. What is it?
me dunno :-[ :-X :-\ :-\
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ukhhh >:( ..lol..
but i dont remember u being there when i posted em..but its ok..ill post another :P
You can take away the whole and still have some left. You can take away some and still have the whole left. What is it?
didnt get da ques ???
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its easy...think think..
give any guesses...
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zoohh
AIR ;D
its kina lame buh so wht :D
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zoohh
AIR ;D
its kina lame buh so wht :D
ok the answer is: The word "wholesome." :P
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hahahahahaha...
funny ans.. lool :D
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Do u have any??!! or i post more?? :P
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me none :(
u post :P
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ok..but i gtg ;D
ill be back afetr an hour or sumthin inshallah!!
U take care..bye Sweety :-*
At night when more people r there it is fun.. :D
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oh ok..
bye Take care salam.. :)
u take care as well :)
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I HAV GOOD JOKES!!! ;D ;D ;D
but i wont post!! >:( >:( >:( :( :(
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I HAV GOOD JOKES!!! ;D ;D ;D
but i wont post!! >:( >:( >:( :( :(
WHYYY ??? :o :o :o :o :o >:( >:( >:( :( :( :(
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I HAV GOOD JOKES!!! ;D ;D ;D
but i wont post!! >:( >:( >:( :( :(
WHYYY ??? :o :o :o :o :o >:( >:( >:( :( :( :(
mony noes y!!
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I HAV GOOD JOKES!!! ;D ;D ;D
but i wont post!! >:( >:( >:( :( :(
WHYYY ??? :o :o :o :o :o >:( >:( >:( :( :( :(
mony noes y!!
ugghh would u both stop wid diz stupid fight nonsense... u've mad me relly mad now >:( >:( >:( >:( :( :( :( :( :( >:( >:( >:( >:( :'( :'( :'(
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why isnt there many people online Today?? :-\
and yeah Boom i know why..u can post them in other threads maybe...
I am still wondering where is Manah...
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me dunno :(
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I HAV GOOD JOKES!!! ;D ;D ;D
but i wont post!! >:( >:( >:( :( :(
WHYYY ??? :o :o :o :o :o >:( >:( >:( :( :( :(
mony noes y!!
ugghh would u both stop wid diz stupid fight nonsense... u've mad me relly mad now >:( >:( >:( >:( :( :( :( :( :( >:( >:( >:( >:( :'( :'( :'(
this should make u happy!!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
only 4 u!!!
A grad student, a post-doc, and a professor are walking through a city park and they find an antique oil lamp.
They rub it and a genie comes out in a puff of smoke.
The genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each of you just one."
"Me first! Me first!" says the grad student. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat with a gorgeous
woman who sunbathes topless." Poof! He's gone.
"Me next! Me next!" says the post-doc. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with a professional hula
dancer on one side and a Mai Tai on the other." Poof! He's gone.
"You're next," the genie says to the professor.
The professor says, "I want those guys back in the lab after lunch." :o :D :D :D
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thanx :(
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i've heard this one.. Thanks though.. :(
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::)
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heey manz... me v happy to see u.. :)
:( :(
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AHAHAHA...ok u still posted it...hahaha...
and Zainy Sweety...ill post a riddle ok?? :P :P :P
MANAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! HEYY!!!!! I MISSED U :-* :-* :-*
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me goin :(
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AHAHAHA...ok u still posted it...hahaha...
and Zainy Sweety...ill post a riddle ok?? :P :P :P
MANAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! HEYY!!!!! I MISSED U :-* :-* :-*
ME too I am Soo Addicted to SF n i have all my frn in my mind i wonder how will spend a month without SF:@ :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
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AHAHAHA...ok u still posted it...hahaha...
and Zainy Sweety...ill post a riddle ok?? :P :P :P
MANAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! HEYY!!!!! I MISSED U :-* :-* :-*
yea..i posted 4 her!!
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AHAHAHA...ok u still posted it...hahaha...
and Zainy Sweety...ill post a riddle ok?? :P :P :P
MANAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! HEYY!!!!! I MISSED U :-* :-* :-*
yea..i posted 4 her!!
well yea..i told u not to..and if u wanted to post for her..u couldve posted them in another thread...
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AHAHAHA...ok u still posted it...hahaha...
and Zainy Sweety...ill post a riddle ok?? :P :P :P
MANAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! HEYY!!!!! I MISSED U :-* :-* :-*
yea..i posted 4 her!!
u did when n where?:S i got to knw wehn Mony posted <3
Mony u cheaked ur pm?
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AHAHAHA...ok u still posted it...hahaha...
and Zainy Sweety...ill post a riddle ok?? :P :P :P
MANAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! HEYY!!!!! I MISSED U :-* :-* :-*
yea..i posted 4 her!!
well yea..i told u not to..and if u wanted to post for her..u couldve posted them in another thread...
i WILL REMOVE IT RIGHT AWAY!!!!!!!! >:( >:( >:( >:(
UR A EGOCENTRIC PERSON I HAV TO SAY!!
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CHILL
Where is omer
ET!!
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AHAHAHA...ok u still posted it...hahaha...
and Zainy Sweety...ill post a riddle ok?? :P :P :P
MANAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! HEYY!!!!! I MISSED U :-* :-* :-*
yea..i posted 4 her!!
well yea..i told u not to..and if u wanted to post for her..u couldve posted them in another thread...
i WILL REMOVE IT RIGHT AWAY!!!!!!!! >:( >:( >:( >:(
UR A EGOCENTRIC PERSON I HAV TO SAY!!
i have no idea wat is Egocentric..u said it twice to me now >:(
and yeah...u wanna remove them..well..good..do it then..
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WHERE IS EVERYBODY!!
BoOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
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WHERE IS EVERYBODY!!
BoOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
yes.................MMMMMMAAAAAAANNNNNNAAAAA
I AM HERE..and this MIGHT be my last post here!!!!
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WHERE IS EVERYBODY!!
BoOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
yes.................MMMMMMAAAAAAANNNNNNAAAAA
I AM HERE..and this MIGHT be my last post here!!!!
so its useless to ask y?
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wow... that's a lot of fighting for one day guyz...
I think you all should calm down a little...
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wow... that's a lot of fighting for one day guyz...
I think you all should calm down a little...
Yaa Roxy i toltally agree :)
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wow... that's a lot of fighting for one day guyz...
I think you all should calm down a little...
Yaa Roxy i toltally agree :)
me agree as well :)
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hahahaha..i got no Jokes but i am laughing HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
THIS PLACE IS BORINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.....AND I WILL NEVER LET IT BE.. :(
ANY JOKES?? KAM??
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BoOm has good jokes?
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BoOm has good jokes?
HAHAHAHAHA AGAIN I AM LAUGHING!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHA!!
U R NOT HYPER POEPLE!! WHY?!!! I never felt bored here now i am :o
I MISS SWEETSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, ABDO, SANITY, EAMYZZ, ROXY, Q80, DEEDO!!!!!!!!!
And i will search for jokes now..but they r all LAME...
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ok this one is Funny!! hahahaha :D
Stupid Kid.
Well some told me that
u cant touch your teeth with your tounge
heres my comments and concerns :
1. Your a big idiot you tryed it right now, knowing that u can do it.
2. Your smiling right now
3. Now your smiling and giggling and making that little laugh
4. you keep on reading this joke
5. Now you stopped reading it cause you just realized it was a complete waste of time.
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difference between complete and finish
Dad, what is the difference between complete and finish?
Dad: my son, if you love the right girl and you got married then your complete;
but, if you love the wrong gal then you're finished
:P :P :P :P :P
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heyy mony sorry im late had to take care of the food
and loved that joke bout the tongue loll ;D
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haha i know i laughed when i read it..haha :D
Wb...ok this one reminds me of Sanity..he posted it once but it was pineapples..and i remember when i read it i couldnt stop laugin...
watermelons
a black person, a mexican, and a white person went to this farm and asked the farmer if they could stay in his barn for the night. the farmer said yes but my daughter sleeps there and if you touch her your going to regret it. so later that night each person fucked her. so the next morning the farmer woke up and saw that they touched her. the farmer goes i told you that you would regret it now go into the fields and pick one hundred of her favorite fruit. the white person was the first one back and he brought one hundred cherries the farmer said good now shove them up your A** so he did and walked away. the next person back was the mexican he came back with one hundred apples the farmer said good now shove them up your A** he gets to 98 and starts laughing and they all fall out he gets to 99 starts laughing and they all fall out the farmer goes Boy what's your problem the mexican goes that damn n*g*er back there is picking watermelons!!!!
haha..hope it is not overrated...
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that was lame!!!
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that was lame!!!
OMG really??!! :o but i laughed when i read it :D
I like any joke that Sanity post :D
and... >:( >:( >:( >:(
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This one is funny :D
weddins
i used to hate goin to weddins all the old grannies would poke me saying "ur next" but they stoped when i started to say it to them at funnerls
hahaha :P
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lool @ the wedding one !!
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nyc one!
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lollss
the wedding ones nice ;D
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ill Be right back..if u have any post :D
hey E_T shofi el fel b4 el last page.. :P
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i HAVE PLENTY OF RIDDLES!!!
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i HAVE PLENTY OF RIDDLES!!!
well go ahead then... :D
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its riddle time!!!
let da games begin....
so
what is Dracula's favorite ice cream flavor???
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Strawberry?? ;D
and KAM congratz for ur 600TH POST!!!!!!!!!! :D
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its riddle time!!!
let da games begin....
so
what is Dracula's favorite ice cream flavor???
bloody chocolate .. ahehehe ..
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Strawberry?? ;D
and KAM congratz for ur 600TH POST!!!!!!!!!! :D
good try mony..but no!!
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ill Be right back..if u have any post :D
hey E_T shofi el fel b4 el last page.. :P
shoft a babeez ??
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strawberry i know its wrong but im helpless :D
loll monny i didnt realise
fanks for da notice
nd hey ourbrain works the same loll
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what is Dracula's favorite place IN NEW YORK???
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FAVORITE flavour is VEIN-ILLA!!
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i was honestly gonna say vanilla darn it
hmm new york.... have no idea
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i was honestly gonna say vanilla darn it
hmm new york.... have no idea
no..its vein-illa............
u noe body veins.....that one........!!!
and try..cummon!!!
its easy!
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WHAT FRUIT WAS A GREAT CONQUERER????
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WHAT FRUIT WAS A GREAT CONQUERER????
Alexander the Grape :P
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hmmm i dunno orange?
or is it cocktail ???
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what is Dracula's favorite place IN NEW YORK???
::) ::) ::) ::)
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right q80 got it
see im soo dumb :(
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right q80 got it
see im soo dumb :(
lol no ur not .. ive heard that riddle before ;) :D
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WHAT FRUIT WAS A GREAT CONQUERER????
Alexander the Grape :P
looooooooooooooool .. & i was like therez sth wrong with tht phrase ..
its the 'grape' .. i kept on repeating it without realizing ..
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what did one volcano say to the other one??
y did the tomato turned RED??
WHAT IS MUMMY'S favorite kind of music???
what is Dracula's favorite place IN NEW YORK???
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right q80 got it
see im soo dumb :(
lol no ur not .. ive heard that riddle before ;) :D
lol thx for the encoouragement but i couldnt get any of the others either :'(
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what did one volcano say to the other one??
y did the tomato turned RED??
WHAT IS MUMMY'S favorite kind of music???
lets get hott ??
cuz it was dancing n the 5alat ?? u guys whats a 5alat n english ??
dunno bout 3rd
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what did one volcano say to the other one??
y did the tomato turned RED??
WHAT IS MUMMY'S favorite kind of music???
lets get hott ??
cuz it was dancing n the 5alat ?? u guys whats a 5alat n english ??
dunno bout 3rd
good try...
but no..none r correct??
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what did one volcano say to the other one??
y did the tomato turned RED??
WHAT IS MUMMY'S favorite kind of music???
lets get hott ??
cuz it was dancing n the 5alat ?? u guys whats a 5alat n english ??
dunno bout 3rd
good try...
but no..none r correct??
gd try ?? imma assume thats sarcasm !
answers plz !! & easy riddles plz ;D
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what did one volcano say to the other one??
y did the tomato turned RED??
WHAT IS MUMMY'S favorite kind of music???
lets get hott ??
cuz it was dancing n the 5alat ?? u guys whats a 5alat n english ??
dunno bout 3rd
good try...
but no..none r correct??
gd try ?? imma assume thats sarcasm !
answers plz !! & easy riddles plz ;D
no et..i am serious.,..good try...
wrs kam and mony..they ran away!!!
ok....
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what did one volcano say to the other one??
y did the tomato turned RED??
WHAT IS MUMMY'S favorite kind of music???
what is Dracula's favorite place IN NEW YORK???
da 1stone is:DO U LAVA ME LIKE I LAVA U!!
AND IT TURNED red couz IT SAW DA SALAD DRESSING... ;D ;D
MUSIC IS: (W)Rap
and last is vampire state building!!
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well if u say 'good try'
gd try it is .. lol
looooooool 'do u lava me like i lava u' .. funny frase
bt how n Godz name am i supposed to think of tht lava one ..
yeah, the 2nd one, we have an arabic version of it & the answer was 'cuz it was dancing n the blender (5alat n arabic)'
3rd one, y rap ??
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3rd one, y rap ??
Mummy's fav type of music .. ancient eygpt .. wraped with bandages :P
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this is easy:
WHAT DO U GETWHEN U ADD 13 HOSPITAL PATIENTS TO 13 HOSPITAL PATIENTS???
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3rd one, y rap ??
Mummy's fav type of music .. ancient eygpt .. wraped with bandages :P
thats ryte!!
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3rd one, y rap ??
Mummy's fav type of music .. ancient eygpt .. wraped with bandages :P
thats ryte!!
ohhhhhhh .. lol ..
crazy riddle !
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I am back :D
now post riddles :D
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this is easy:
WHAT DO U GETWHEN U ADD 13 HOSPITAL PATIENTS TO 13 HOSPITAL PATIENTS???
26 hospital patients ?
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I am back :D
now post riddles :D
mony..croll back 1 page only!!
-
this is easy:
WHAT DO U GETWHEN U ADD 13 HOSPITAL PATIENTS TO 13 HOSPITAL PATIENTS???
26 hospital patients ?
no....not at all
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this is easy:
WHAT DO U GETWHEN U ADD 13 HOSPITAL PATIENTS TO 13 HOSPITAL PATIENTS???
is it easy ?? really ??
k, ummmm .. then 26 hospitals ?? (without the patients) :-\ :-\
k, u knw, boom ?? u cn wait 4 kam or sth ..
i cnt keep on feeling dumb wen they're easy .. lol
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ok for the hospitale thing..13?? :-\
and ill post easy ones now :D
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the ans IS TWENTY-SICKS!!!
-
heeeeyyyy
i said that .. but in numbers :P
-
heeeeyyyy
i said that .. but in numbers :P
but its sicks..not six!! :P :P
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hahaha this one was funny...
ok this one is easy..Q80 if u know it dont answer..cuz i posted it b4 :P
I arrive once in every second, once in every minute and once in every year. What am I?
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hahaha this one was funny...
ok this one is easy..Q80 if u know it dont answer..cuz i posted it b4 :P
I arrive once in every second, once in every minute and once in every year. What am I?
da ans is E!
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hahaha this one was funny...
ok this one is easy..Q80 if u know it dont answer..cuz i posted it b4 :P
I arrive once in every second, once in every minute and once in every year. What am I?
da ans is E!
YOU GOOGLED IT >:(
ok another one..where is E_T i am postin those easy ones for her >:(
It regulates our daily movements, but it feels no interest in our lives. It directs us when to come and go, but does not care if we pay attention. What is it?
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hahaha this one was funny...
ok this one is easy..Q80 if u know it dont answer..cuz i posted it b4 :P
I arrive once in every second, once in every minute and once in every year. What am I?
da ans is E!
YOU GOOGLED IT >:(
ok another one..where is E_T i am postin those easy ones for her >:(
It regulates our daily movements, but it feels no interest in our lives. It directs us when to come and go, but does not care if we pay attention. What is it?
no i didnt !!! >:( >:(
how can i do sso fast..
i hav heard it be4
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ok so u knew it b4....so u still didnt solve it urself :D
and E_T??!! answer this one...
-
me back
and ashamed :(
kk lemme think hmm
ive heard it b4 too
hmm secret?
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hahaha this one was funny...
ok this one is easy..Q80 if u know it dont answer..cuz i posted it b4 :P
I arrive once in every second, once in every minute and once in every year. What am I?
da ans is E!
YOU GOOGLED IT >:(
ok another one..where is E_T i am postin those easy ones for her >:(
It regulates our daily movements, but it feels no interest in our lives. It directs us when to come and go, but does not care if we pay attention. What is it?
no, mony, the e one was easy ..
2nd one isnt ! :P
eh, let boom answer it .. maybe he'd google it like the 1st one :P
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hahaha E_T...it is really easy...
Kam Guess..only guess :D
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its so easy!!!
ur posting easy riddles..which i knew 4rm gr.5!! :P :P
shall i tell
-
ahehehe .. mony, i dnt think there was an answer 4 a long time ..
so, i slightly guess we dunno ;D
edit : or here boom goes .. lol
yeah boom, what is it ??
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a CLOCK..regulates our daily movements, but it feels no interest in our lives. It directs us when to come and go, but does not care if we pay attention.
i knew 4rm grade 5
i promise..
no joke...!!!
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a CLOCK..regulates our daily movements, but it feels no interest in our lives. It directs us when to come and go, but does not care if we pay attention.
i knew 4rm grade 5
i promise..
no joke...!!!
i wanted to say time ..
was tht okay ??
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ok E_T this one is really easy..U better answer it >:(
The man who makes it does not need it. The man who buys its does not use it. The man who uses it doesn't know he is. What is it?
and Boom's answer is right >:(
E_T makonti ta2olil ai haga..i said Guess.. :P
-
was goin on ?!?? :S
-
oh mony what's the answer :P i couldnt figure out the answer!
-
a coffinn to monys answer ;D
-
anythin new.. because am confused here :S
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anythin new.. because am confused here :S
loll mony posted a riddle thts all ;D
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sooo hw bout anoder 1 because u knw... ::)
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hmmm me blank i have no riddles
wait till mony cums shell post i hope
right i have to goo
see ya gals
luff u all :-* :-* :-*
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byee kam.. Take care luff u..
nd i have no idea.. when i'll talk to u nxt..
-
WAIT A SEC.. ARE BOOM ND MONY TALKIN TO EACH ODER ??? ??? ??? :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :o :o :o :o :o
-
DO U WANT ME TO POST 1000S OF RIDDLES!! ;D ;D
mony..is simply jealous cuz i am giving da ans!!!!
i dont noe y :-\ :-\ :-\
but she gets angry when i post da ans!!
-
hey boom.. u werent postin anywhere :-\
hmm.. ya post though i will nt guess.. unless im sure.. because i guess weird stuff :D
-
hey boom.. u werent postin anywhere :-\
hmm.. ya post though i will nt guess.. unless im sure.. because i guess weird stuff :D
scroll 2 pages back!!!
i posted many riddles!! :-X
-
hey boom.. u werent postin anywhere :-\
hmm.. ya post though i will nt guess.. unless im sure.. because i guess weird stuff :D
scroll 2 pages back!!!
i posted many riddles!! :-X
ya.. i know i waz readin them.. lol :D
hmm.. hav u gt anymore ??? ::) ::) ;)
-
ok Kam u got it right becuz i were there when i posted it :P
and yeah Zainy ill post more now :P
Difficult ones..that NO ONE could answer :D :D :D
-
no0o0oo0o0o u cant post hard ones .. because if u do i will not answer them.. because u knw i cant get da eazy 1's so u knw ::) ::)
-
ok Kam u got it right becuz i were there when i posted it :P
and yeah Zainy ill post more now :P
Difficult ones..that NO ONE could answer :D :D :D
mony UR riddles..can be easily ans by my young sis!! :P :P :o ;D :D :D :D
-
ok Zainy ill post u easy ones only for u..
and ill post a very difficult ones for "Other People" and let us see >:(
-
nooo boomm im rellyy bored nd i wanna see hw good i am wid riddles so let her post nd if i cant answer den u doo okie :D
-
ok Zainy ill post u easy ones only for u..
and ill post a very difficult ones for "Other People" and let us see >:(
mony..i am like ur bro..cummon!!!
y u so rude with me!!!
and ok post..i will try my best to ans!! :-[ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\
-
guyz PEACE :D please 4 now.. till im here :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :'( :'(
-
ok here is an easy one..Zainy u must answer that..it is sooooo easy: What always ends everything? (PS: ITS FOR ZAINY ONLY >:( )
another one: If measured from the center of the planet, which mountain on Earth is the highest?
-
nooo boomm im rellyy bored nd i wanna see hw good i am wid riddles so let her post nd if i cant answer den u doo okie :D
okies!!
-
:o ::)
-
ok Zainy ill post u easy ones only for u..
and ill post a very difficult ones for "Other People" and let us see >:(
mony..i am like ur bro..cummon!!!
y u so rude with me!!!
and ok post..i will try my best to ans!! :-[ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\
Like??? U r my brother :D
well i have to be rude :D its for some reason......... :(
u know zainy right.. :(
-
:o ::)
y r u so shocked :D
-
:o ::)
y r u so shocked :D
that was soppsed to be my entry
-
yes mony i knw :(
sorry though.. :(
and uh.. mm.. the answer to da riddle... the first 1 is it fullsttop ??
and lemme think for the second 1 ::)
-
ok Zainy ill post u easy ones only for u..
and ill post a very difficult ones for "Other People" and let us see >:(
mony..i am like ur bro..cummon!!!
y u so rude with me!!!
and ok post..i will try my best to ans!! :-[ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\
Like??? U r my brother :D
well i have to be rude :D its for some reason......... :(
u know zainy right.. :(
Mana ToOo
-
:o ::)
y r u so shocked :D
that was soppsed to be my entry
hahahaha...a very nice n attractive entery :D
and Zainy..u r sooooooooo close..but wats b4 the fullstop ;D
Yup and Manah too :D
-
ok Zainy ill post u easy ones only for u..
and ill post a very difficult ones for "Other People" and let us see >:(
mony..i am like ur bro..cummon!!!
y u so rude with me!!!
and ok post..i will try my best to ans!! :-[ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\
Like??? U r my brother :D
well i have to be rude :D its for some reason......... :(
u know zainy right.. :(
Mana ToOo
mony told u !?? :S :o :o :o :o :o :( :( :(
-
:o ::)
y r u so shocked :D
that was soppsed to be my entry
hahahaha...a very nice n attractive entery :D
and Zainy..u r sooooooooo close..but wats b4 the fullstop ;D
Yup and Manah too :D
WAITT LEMME THINK OKAY
-
ok here is an easy one..Zainy u must answer that..it is sooooo easy: What always ends everything? (PS: ITS FOR ZAINY ONLY >:( )
another one: If measured from the center of the planet, which mountain on Earth is the highest?
i noe da ans.......
DA 2ND ONE IS DIFFICULT.............
but my geography teacher asked us in 9th grade!!!!!
i noe da ans..shall i tell???
-
noooooooooooooooo booommm waiittt
-
:o ::)
y r u so shocked :D
that was soppsed to be my entry
hahahaha...a very nice n attractive entery :D
and Zainy..u r sooooooooo close..but wats b4 the fullstop ;D
Yup and Manah too :D
WAITT LEMME THINK OKAY
Yes Zainy i do knw it ...
why r u stunned/shocked?
-
itz umm shockin :o :o :o
wait ill talk to u ryt now okay :)
-
itz umm shockin :o :o :o
wait ill talk to u ryt now okay :)
loll sure....
n umm ya i am online on msn soo u can talk to me
-
NO NO..U TWO DONT SPEAK!! WAITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT FOR ME.. ;D
-
NO NO..U TWO DONT SPEAK!! WAITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT FOR ME.. ;D
haha ok love mana is waiting
-
for da second 1 is it mount everest ??
if itz rong then BOOM CAN ANSWER 4 ME !! :D
and the first 1 is it a letter !??
-
for da second 1 is it mount everest ??
if itz rong then BOOM CAN ANSWER 4 ME !! :D
and the first 1 is it a letter !??
zainy da 1st one is a letter......!!!!
and da other...is Mount Chimborazo
it is located in Ecuador.......
-
for da second 1 is it mount everest ??
if itz rong then BOOM CAN ANSWER 4 ME !! :D
and the first 1 is it a letter !??
zainy da 1st one is a letter......!!!!
and da other...is Mount Chimborazo
it is located in Ecuador.......
i said da answer to the first 1 ... itz corrext woohhoo ::D
-
for da second 1 is it mount everest ??
if itz rong then BOOM CAN ANSWER 4 ME !! :D
and the first 1 is it a letter !??
zainy da 1st one is a letter......!!!!
and da other...is Mount Chimborazo
it is located in Ecuador.......
i said da answer to the first 1 ... itz corrext woohhoo ::D
lol..no da ans is a letter..likeits an alphabet g..
not"letter"
-
datz wat i meant..
-
:) ;) :D ;D >:( :( :o 8) ??? ::) :P :-[ :-X :-\ :-* :'(
-
:'( :-* :-\ :-X :-[ :P ::) ??? 8) :o :( >:( ;D :D ;) :)
-
ok the second's one answer is wrong :P
and first one is the letter G... ;D
-
y da letter G ??? :S
-
y da letter G ??? :S
well check the word "Everything" :P :P
-
y da letter G ??? :S
well check the word "Everything" :P :P
hahahahhahahahahahaha lmaaooo :D :D :D :P
-
y da letter G ??? :S
well check the word "Everything" :P :P
hahahahhahahahahahaha lmaaooo :D :D :D :P
i told u its easy :P :P
-
oh w/e mony :P :P ::)
-
hav u got somethin good mony.
-
Wat do u mean Boom ???
and Zainy..i did :D i hope u did too :P
so did u people give up for the 2nd one :P
and shalla i post more?? or ur bored?? :P
-
wasnt tht good ?? ? :-\
-
wasnt tht good ?? ? :-\
??? ??? ??? wat is good??!
-
i posted 4 da last one...if that is rong then i dont noe.
but i am sure its correct........
and i hav got a lot more.......
but unfortunately u guyz.....r not good with guesses....
so shall i post??
-
yes boom im not gd wid guesses ::)
guess u knw tht :D
fine post more ;D ;D
-
for da second 1 is it mount everest ??
if itz rong then BOOM CAN ANSWER 4 ME !! :D
and the first 1 is it a letter !??
zainy da 1st one is a letter......!!!!
and da other...is Mount Chimborazo
it is located in Ecuador.......
Ohhhhh yeah..that is right!! :D
me wondering how u knew it >:(
-
lol hiz teacha told him :D
-
ok here is an easy one..Zainy u must answer that..it is sooooo easy: What always ends everything? (PS: ITS FOR ZAINY ONLY >:( )
another one: If measured from the center of the planet, which mountain on Earth is the highest?
i noe da ans.......
DA 2ND ONE IS DIFFICULT.............
but my geography teacher asked us in 9th grade!!!!!
i noe da ans..shall i tell???
look above mony!!
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST??
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED?
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG?
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES??
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS??
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST?? at dent o clock ;D
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED? go to sleep ?? :P
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG? NONE
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES?? the mud :S
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS?? trycycle
i guessed them so u wont be mad.. but i knw they r all rong ::)
-
CAN ANY ONE GUESS MY RIDDLES!!
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST??
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED?
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG?
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES??
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS??
i quoted as to answer ..
bt i swear i hve noo idea .. my mind is pretty empty now ..
mre than usual ..
so, cn u gimme the asnwers ??
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST??
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED?
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG?
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES??
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS??
i quoted as to answer ..
bt i swear i hve noo idea .. my mind is pretty empty now ..
mre than usual ..
so, cn u gimme the asnwers ??
AT LEAST TRY LIKE HOW ZAINY DID!??
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST??
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED?
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG?
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES??
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS??
i quoted as to answer ..
bt i swear i hve noo idea .. my mind is pretty empty now ..
mre than usual ..
so, cn u gimme the asnwers ??
AT LEAST TRY LIKE HOW ZAINY DID!??
k k .. dont scream !!
1) at den .. i think thats what zainy said, so im cheating .. :P
2) i'm a BLANK ET :P
3) as much as to fill the bag ??
4) noo idea
5) same like previous
boom, i knw i'm a disgrace now .. bt, therez nth i cn do
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST??
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED?
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG?
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES??
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS??
i quoted as to answer ..
bt i swear i hve noo idea .. my mind is pretty empty now ..
mre than usual ..
so, cn u gimme the asnwers ??
AT LEAST TRY LIKE HOW ZAINY DID!??
k k .. dont scream !!
1) at den .. i think thats what zainy said, so im cheating .. :P
2) i'm a BLANK ET :P
3) as much as to fill the bag ??
4) noo idea
5) same like previous
boom, i knw i'm a disgrace now .. bt, therez nth i cn do
no sweety......ur not a disgrace...its ok!!
-
bt honestly, r YOU good at riddles ??
-
bt honestly, r YOU good at riddles ??
al7amdulilah!!!
i am! ;D
-
bt honestly, r YOU good at riddles ??
al7amdulilah!!!
i am! ;D
good good u catching pu with 3 7 5
one more 3'
-
bt honestly, r YOU good at riddles ??
al7amdulilah!!!
i am! ;D
good good u catching pu with 3 7 5
one more 3'
?????
-
hey boom.. did i get any ryt ?? ::)
-
hey boom.. did i get any ryt ?? ::)
no..u werent even close......
try again..4 me plz...
-
bt honestly, r YOU good at riddles ??
al7amdulilah!!!
i am! ;D
good good u catching pu with 3 7 5
one more 3'
?????
::) ::) ::) ::)
-
hey boom.. did i get any ryt ?? ::)
no..u werent even close......
try again..4 me plz...
ya.. i gueess i wasnt close ::) which is a v smart guess ::) :P
fine imma guess again.. but wht do i get in return ?? :) :D
-
so wat happened so far?? :D
-
boom posted a list of riddlez i guessed them all wrong ::) ::)
and he's askin me to try again.. buh i wanna knw wat i'll get in return ::) :P :P :D
-
boom posted a list of riddlez i guessed them all wrong ::) ::)
and he's askin me to try again.. buh i wanna knw wat i'll get in return ::) :P :P :D
When we used to play b4..we used to +rep each other :D
-
boom posted a list of riddlez i guessed them all wrong ::) ::)
and he's askin me to try again.. buh i wanna knw wat i'll get in return ::) :P :P :D
When we used to play b4..we used to +rep each other :D
how do u guys + repp each other i cant do it!!!
yan3 when i doo it doesnt work :S
-
boom posted a list of riddlez i guessed them all wrong ::) ::)
and he's askin me to try again.. buh i wanna knw wat i'll get in return ::) :P :P :D
When we used to play b4..we used to +rep each other :D
o0o0oohh tht soundz nyc..
but ya i knw tht sum1 is playin wid my rep.. *sigh*
soo... wassup ? loll
-
boom posted a list of riddlez i guessed them all wrong ::) ::)
and he's askin me to try again.. buh i wanna knw wat i'll get in return ::) :P :P :D
When we used to play b4..we used to +rep each other :D
how do u guys + repp each other i cant do it!!!
yan3 when i doo it doesnt work :S
IT DOESNT WORK 4 ME EITHER :s
-
we used to +rep each other with the old system..but this one doesnt work well..
and Zainy..i had a shower :P U??
-
we used to +rep each other with the old system..but this one doesnt work well..
and Zainy..i had a shower :P U??
u guys dont play now
yan3 u guys aent talking or what
-
o0oh me jus changed into my pajamies.. ;D
-
me finally closed my bag !
my dad was waiting 4 this moment since the morn. lol .. he has screaming on the top of his lungs all day 4 me to finally close my bag, bt i was too lazy .. lol
-
me finally closed my bag !
my dad was waiting 4 this moment since the morn. lol .. he has screaming on the top of his lungs all day 4 me to finally close my bag, bt i was too lazy .. lol
woohoo congratz.. i closed mine an hour ago :D
-
we used to +rep each other with the old system..but this one doesnt work well..
and Zainy..i had a shower :P U??
u guys dont play now
yan3 u guys aent talking or what
well..we used to ..but now Sanity, Abdo, Zero, Al-eagle, Omer, Q80, Roxy, Kam...are not here at the same time to play..we used to do it every night but now......... :(
haha Cool Zainy..i can imagine u in ur pijamas :P
hahahahaha CONGRATZ E_T FOR CLOSING UR BAG!! HAHAHAHA!!
-
me finally closed my bag !
my dad was waiting 4 this moment since the morn. lol .. he has screaming on the top of his lungs all day 4 me to finally close my bag, bt i was too lazy .. lol
Y R U TRAVELLING!!!
-
we used to +rep each other with the old system..but this one doesnt work well..
and Zainy..i had a shower :P U??
u guys dont play now
yan3 u guys aent talking or what
well..we used to ..but now Sanity, Abdo, Zero, Al-eagle, Omer, Q80, Roxy, Kam...are not here at the same time to play..we used to do it every night but now......... :(
haha Cool Zainy..i can imagine u in ur pijamas :P
hahahahaha CONGRATZ E_T FOR CLOSING UR BAG!! HAHAHAHA!!
noo monyy u CANT.. u cant even guess wat colour !! :P :P ::)
-
we used to +rep each other with the old system..but this one doesnt work well..
and Zainy..i had a shower :P U??
u guys dont play now
yan3 u guys aent talking or what
well..we used to ..but now Sanity, Abdo, Zero, Al-eagle, Omer, Q80, Roxy, Kam...are not here at the same time to play..we used to do it every night but now......... :(
haha Cool Zainy..i can imagine u in ur pijamas :P
hahahahaha CONGRATZ E_T FOR CLOSING UR BAG!! HAHAHAHA!!
noo monyy u CANT.. u cant even guess wat colour !! :P :P ::)
pink/black
-
we used to +rep each other with the old system..but this one doesnt work well..
and Zainy..i had a shower :P U??
u guys dont play now
yan3 u guys aent talking or what
well..we used to ..but now Sanity, Abdo, Zero, Al-eagle, Omer, Q80, Roxy, Kam...are not here at the same time to play..we used to do it every night but now......... :(
haha Cool Zainy..i can imagine u in ur pijamas :P
hahahahaha CONGRATZ E_T FOR CLOSING UR BAG!! HAHAHAHA!!
noo monyy u CANT.. u cant even guess wat colour !! :P :P ::)
pink/black
why do u say pink ? :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o ::) ::) ::) :o :o :o
-
Hey Zainy..ummm..the colour is...Yellow!!
or Blue??!! :-\
-
we used to +rep each other with the old system..but this one doesnt work well..
and Zainy..i had a shower :P U??
u guys dont play now
yan3 u guys aent talking or what
well..we used to ..but now Sanity, Abdo, Zero, Al-eagle, Omer, Q80, Roxy, Kam...are not here at the same time to play..we used to do it every night but now......... :(
haha Cool Zainy..i can imagine u in ur pijamas :P
hahahahaha CONGRATZ E_T FOR CLOSING UR BAG!! HAHAHAHA!!
noo monyy u CANT.. u cant even guess wat colour !! :P :P ::)
pink/black
why do u say pink ? :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o ::) ::) ::) :o :o :o
y its wrong?
-
LOL LOL ITS BLACK ND BLUE.. KINA A MIXTURE :D looll :D :D :D
-
no manz y did u think pink !? ::) thtz y i waz shocked but yea black is ryt ::)
-
LOL LOL ITS BLACK ND BLUE.. KINA A MIXTURE :D looll :D :D :D
mana was close:D
-
yesh manz was nd so waz mony :D
-
yesh manz was nd so waz mony :D
hahaha..we both did it!!!!!!!!!
-
yesh u both did.. ;D
-
yesh manz was nd so waz mony :D
hahaha..we both did it!!!!!!!!!
HI5 ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST??
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED?
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG?
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES??
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS??
-
yesh manz was nd so waz mony :D
hahaha..we both did it!!!!!!!!!
HI5 ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D
hahaha HI5 BACK!! and a KISS N A HUG!! :-* :-* :-* :-*
i wont do any group hugs till Sweetsh comes.. :P
-
yesh manz was nd so waz mony :D
hahaha..we both did it!!!!!!!!!
HI5 ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D
hahaha HI5 BACK!! and a KISS N A HUG!! :-* :-* :-* :-*
i wont do any group hugs till Sweetsh comes.. :P
i wont be here :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
-
yesh manz was nd so waz mony :D
hahaha..we both did it!!!!!!!!!
HI5 ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D
hahaha HI5 BACK!! and a KISS N A HUG!! :-* :-* :-* :-*
i wont do any group hugs till Sweetsh comes.. :P
i wont be here :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
well i pass it to u in a pm :D :D :D
hahahaha Now me n u Hugs n kisses :-* :-*
-
yesh manz was nd so waz mony :D
hahaha..we both did it!!!!!!!!!
HI5 ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D
hahaha HI5 BACK!! and a KISS N A HUG!! :-* :-* :-* :-*
i wont do any group hugs till Sweetsh comes.. :P
i wont be here :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
well i pass it to u in a pm :D :D :D
hahahaha Now me n u Hugs n kisses :-* :-*
fine.. :)
hugs n kisses bak !!
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST??
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED?
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG?
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES??
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS??
::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ???
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST?? at night...
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED? Do u want a cover??
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG? 10
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES?? in the....
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS?? ......
very difficult ???
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST?? at night...
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED? Do u want a cover??
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG? 10
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES?? in the....
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS?? ......
very difficult ???
well.da 2nd one is 90%correct!!
and others r rong!!
-
ok then lets stick to the 2nd one.. ;D...
it said: Are u feelin cold??!! do u want me to cover u??!! Do u want a blanket?? Do u want Protection??!!!!!!!!!! :-\ :-\ :-\
-
ahehehehe shoshou ..
boom,
i think shoshou is running out of minds ..
i did, like a looooooooooong time ago ..
plz give us the answers !
-
ok then lets stick to the 2nd one.. ;D...
it said: Are u feelin cold??!! do u want me to cover u??!! Do u want a blanket?? Do u want Protection??!!!!!!!!!! :-\ :-\ :-\
good try mony........
it said "I GOT U COVERED" ;D ;D
-
hahaha..i was close though :D
these riddles R DIFFICULT!!!!!
Give us the answers for them ;D
-
WHAT TIME DO U GO TO DA DENTIST?? "TOOTH-HURTY"
WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY TO THE BED? "I GOT U COVERED"
HOW MANY BOOKS CAN U PUT IN DA EMPTY SCHOOL BAG? "ONLY 1 CUZ....AFTR 1 BOOK IT DOES NT REMAIN EMPTY"
WHERE DO PIGS LEAVE THEIR VEHICLES?? "PORKING PLACE"
WHAT IS GREEN AND HAS YELLOW WHEELS?? "GRASS! I LIED ABT DA WHEELS!!!! :P :P ;D ;D ;D"
-
looooooooooooooool .. these r hilarious !!
porking place !
& hey, u werent supposed to lie (its nt like i would hve gt nyways, bt STILL !!)
-
looooooooooooooool .. these r hilarious !!
porking place !
& hey, u werent supposed to lie (its nt like i would hve gt nyways, bt STILL !!)
i noe...............i made it by myself ;D ;D ;D :P :P
so do u like them!!!
wanna hav some more!!
-
haha i liked the first one the most :D
ok E_T do u want me to post u easy ones?? :P
-
boom, if they're hard, u better post the answers too .. :P
shoshou : as long as they're easy brdo !
-
ok here: What can you hold without it ever using your arms or hands?
-
what is a ghost's favorite dessert??
why did the lion spit out the clown??
why did boom throw the clock out of da window??
what starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it??
-
shoshou : feelings ?? if its sth tangible, i hve no idea
-
E_T u r close... :D
-
ok here: What can you hold without it ever using your arms or hands?
ur pee...... ;D ;D :D :D :P :P :P
or ur thoughts..
ur breath!!!!
there can be so many ans!!
-
ok here: What can you hold without it ever using your arms or hands?
ur pee...... ;D ;D :D :D :P :P :P
or ur thoughts..
ur breath!!!!
there can be so many ans!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA..I LAUGHED IN A LOUD VOICE......HAHAHA..THAT IS DISGUSTING..EWWW...HAHAHAHA
ok the 3rd answer is Correct..u did it again ::)
i will try to answeer urs now..
-
ok here: What can you hold without it ever using your arms or hands?
ur pee...... ;D ;D :D :D :P :P :P
or ur thoughts..
ur breath!!!!
there can be so many ans!!
looooooooooooool .. ur pee .. hmm, like the way u think .. lol
-
ok here: What can you hold without it ever using your arms or hands?
ur pee...... ;D ;D :D :D :P :P :P
or ur thoughts..
ur breath!!!!
there can be so many ans!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA..I LAUGHED IN A LOUD VOICE......HAHAHA..THAT IS DISGUSTING..EWWW...HAHAHAHA
ok the 3rd answer is Correct..u did it again ::)
i will try to answeer urs now..
but i made u laugh!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
and its ur turn now!!!
-
what is a ghost's favorite dessert?? .......
why did the lion spit out the clown?? he thought it was his hair.. ???
why did boom throw the clock out of da window?? becuz it was makin a loud noise :-\
what starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it?? umm..Soup...any food with letters...
[/quote]
-
what is a ghost's favorite dessert?? .......
why did the lion spit out the clown?? he thought it was his hair.. ???
why did boom throw the clock out of da window?? becuz it was makin a loud noise :-\
what starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it?? umm..Soup...any food with letters...
[/quote]
cummon..mony..try harder.............
plzz.......
-
what is a ghost's favorite dessert?? .......
why did the lion spit out the clown?? he thought it was his hair.. ???
why did boom throw the clock out of da window?? becuz it was makin a loud noise :-\
what starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it?? umm..Soup...any food with letters...
cummon..mony..try harder.............
plzz.......
[/quote]
Those r reallyyyy difficult!!!!!!!!
mmm....
Lion one: there was Rain...so he thought..??
-
cummon!!!!
at least u can do da last one..
its sooooooooooooo easy!!
-
what is a ghost's favorite dessert??
why did the lion spit out the clown??
why did boom throw the clock out of da window??
what starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it??
1) crepe (sth to do with crap ?? k, now am jst ofc crapping)
2) the clown did sth nt nice inside its mouth ??
3) cuz boom is always mad @ some1 ??
4) hmmm ..
-
=S =S =S
-
what is a ghost's favorite dessert??
why did the lion spit out the clown??
why did boom throw the clock out of da window??
what starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it??
1) crepe (sth to do with crap ?? k, now am jst ofc crapping)
2) the clown did sth nt nice inside its mouth ??
3) cuz boom is always mad @ some1 ??
4) hmmm ..
not even close!! :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :-X :-[ :-[ :-[
cummon..and i am not mad at someone!
-
ok give us hints??!! :-\
-
ok give us hints??!! :-\
cant do that..
i hav to go now!!!
so i will post da ans tomorrow!!!
-
last one is PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (E x 999,998)
-
last one is PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (E x 999,998)
nyce......try..
but NO!!
-
last one is PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (E x 999,998)
hahaha..maybe u r right :D
and WAT HAPPENED TO UR POSTS?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :o :o :o u were in 2000ths right??!
-
last one is PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (E x 999,998)
hahaha..maybe u r right :D
and WAT HAPPENED TO UR POSTS?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :o :o :o u were in 2000ths right??!
nope :/
but ur almost reached ur 1300th :D
-
what is a ghost's favorite dessert??
why did the lion spit out the clown??
why did boom throw the clock out of da window??
what starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it??
1) crepe (sth to do with crap ?? k, now am jst ofc crapping)
2) the clown did sth nt nice inside its mouth ??
3) cuz boom is always mad @ some1 ??
4) hmmm ..
not even close!! :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :-X :-[ :-[ :-[
cummon..and i am not mad at someone!
yeah, thts right .. u werent mad @ someone .. ur mad @ evey1 :P :P :P
(that my last bugging u, for at least 3 days)
-
what is a ghost's favorite dessert??
why did the lion spit out the clown??
why did boom throw the clock out of da window??
what starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it??
1) crepe (sth to do with crap ?? k, now am jst ofc crapping)
2) the clown did sth nt nice inside its mouth ??
3) cuz boom is always mad @ some1 ??
4) hmmm ..
not even close!! :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :-X :-[ :-[ :-[
cummon..and i am not mad at someone!
yeah, thts right .. u werent mad @ someone .. ur mad @ evey1 :P :P :P
(that my last bugging u, for at least 3 days)
U KIDDING ME RIGHT 3 DAYS! :o :o :o :o :o
-
what is a ghost's favorite dessert??la la desert
why did the lion spit out the clown??
bcuz the lion told him to perform
why did boom throw the clock out of da window??Cuz it wasnt working/the noice made him annoyed
what starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it??there arent million letters dude do u mean million letters repeating/??
-
those riddles r really difficult..u have nuthin to think about them ::)
-
those riddles r really difficult..u have nuthin to think about them ::)
DONT BE JEALOUS........CUZ..UR RIDDLES r a PIECE OF CAKE!!!! :P :P :P :P
-
those riddles r really difficult..u have nuthin to think about them ::)
DONT BE JEALOUS........CUZ..UR RIDDLES r a PIECE OF CAKE!!!! :P :P :P :P
OH YEA RIGHT!! I HAVE VERY VERY DIFFICULT ONES!! that i know that no one could solve...
and give us the answers for those u posted..we all give up :D
-
those riddles r really difficult..u have nuthin to think about them ::)
DONT BE JEALOUS........CUZ..UR RIDDLES r a PIECE OF CAKE!!!! :P :P :P :P
OH YEA RIGHT!! I HAVE VERY VERY DIFFICULT ONES!! that i know that no one could solve...
and give us the answers for those u posted..we all give up :D
y dont u post urs!!!!!
urs r SOOOO EASY!!!!
and i wont giv da ans unless someone else tries!!
-
ok here: What are the only English words with three consecutive repeated letters. For example, sweet-toothed would be one (ee,tt,oo) if it weren't for the hyphen.
-
joke:
A wise teacher sends this note to all parents on the first day of school: "If you promise not to believe everything that your child says happens at school, I'll promise not to believe everything he says happens at home."
-
joke:
A wise teacher sends this note to all parents on the first day of school: "If you promise not to believe everything that your child says happens at school, I'll promise not to believe everything he says happens at home."
hahaha...yea right...haha...
post more if u have.. :D
and Helloooo Sister (forgot that ;D) :-*
-
mony..that si an old riddle!!!
i knew da ans 4rm gr9!!!!!!!!!!!
hahahahahaha
its bookkeeper or keeping!!!
-
well mmmm ok Boom..wat do i expect from a guy who took 15 subjects ::) ::) ::) (mashallah :D)
ok here is another: 75% can be written as 3/4. How would 58 1/3% be written as a fraction (when reduced to the lowest denominator)?
-
well mmmm ok Boom..wat do i expect from a guy who took 15 subjects ::) ::) ::) (mashallah :D)
ok here is another: 75% can be written as 3/4. How would 58 1/3% be written as a fraction (when reduced to the lowest denominator)?
this is a difficult one!!
let me solve it 1st!!
-
well mmmm ok Boom..wat do i expect from a guy who took 15 subjects ::) ::) ::) (mashallah :D)
ok here is another: 75% can be written as 3/4. How would 58 1/3% be written as a fraction (when reduced to the lowest denominator)?
7/12
-
well mmmm ok Boom..wat do i expect from a guy who took 15 subjects ::) ::) ::) (mashallah :D)
ok here is another: 75% can be written as 3/4. How would 58 1/3% be written as a fraction (when reduced to the lowest denominator)?
7/12?
yea..i am getting da same ans!!
-
Oh U DID IT ZARA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
that is right!! did u google it?? ???
-
Oh U DID IT ZARA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
that is right!! did u google it?? ???
nope...i solved it
-
Oh U DID IT ZARA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
that is right!! did u google it?? ???
nope...i solved it
ohhhh goooooooood girl!! u deserve a +rep now!! :D
sorry Boom but Zara sloved it first :P
-
Oh U DID IT ZARA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
that is right!! did u google it?? ???
nope...i solved it
ohhhh goooooooood girl!! u deserve a +rep now!! :D
sorry Boom but Zara sloved it first :P
Thanks ;D
-
i did it without da caclulator.......so it took time!!!! ::)
and zara..i am so sure u used da calucator
-
i did it without da caclulator.......so it took time!!!! ::)
and zara..i am so sure u used da calucator
oh gud then boom...
yea i used calci..
-
This thing runs but cannot walk, sometimes sings but never talks. Lacks arms, has hands; lacks a head but has a face. What is it?
-
This thing runs but cannot walk, sometimes sings but never talks. Lacks arms, has hands; lacks a head but has a face. What is it?
time!!!
or perhaps a clock!!
yea..i think a clock!!!!!
-
This thing runs but cannot walk, sometimes sings but never talks. Lacks arms, has hands; lacks a head but has a face. What is it?
time!!!
or perhaps a clock!!
yea..i think a clock!!!!!
yea rite...wz pretty easy
-
This thing runs but cannot walk, sometimes sings but never talks. Lacks arms, has hands; lacks a head but has a face. What is it?
time!!!
or perhaps a clock!!
yea..i think a clock!!!!!
yea rite...wz pretty easy
indeed it was..
-
ok zara i tried + repping u but this message came to me.. ???
An Error Has Occurred!
Please spread the love before giving it to this user again.
-
ok zara i tried + repping u but this message came to me.. ???
An Error Has Occurred!
Please spread the love before giving it to this user again.
so..mony....spread it !!!
to me ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
-
ok zara i tried + repping u but this message came to me.. ???
An Error Has Occurred!
Please spread the love before giving it to this user again.
so..mony....spread it !!!
to me ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Hahahahaha...hahaha..yea right...hahaha
no i think maybe someone else...SWEETSH!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
:P :P :P
-
ok zara i tried + repping u but this message came to me.. ???
An Error Has Occurred!
Please spread the love before giving it to this user again.
so..mony....spread it !!!
to me ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Hahahahaha...hahaha..yea right...hahaha
no i think maybe someone else...SWEETSH!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
:P :P :P
ok..sis................. :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\
-
ok here is another riddle..if u solve it ill give it to u :D
Place the first three in an equilateral triangle so that the foot of each is the same distance from the others as the height of a wineglass. Then place the fourth wineglass in the middle of the triangle, upside down.
-
ok zara i tried + repping u but this message came to me.. ???
An Error Has Occurred!
Please spread the love before giving it to this user again.
ozay sis...no probs
-
so Zara try solvin my riddle ;D
or shall i post an easy one?? :-\
-
ok here is another riddle..if u solve it ill give it to u :D
Place the first three in an equilateral triangle so that the foot of each is the same distance from the others as the height of a wineglass. Then place the fourth wineglass in the middle of the triangle, upside down.
mony..let me actually do it..
i am going in my kitchen now!!
-
ok here is another riddle..if u solve it ill give it to u :D
Place the first three in an equilateral triangle so that the foot of each is the same distance from the others as the height of a wineglass. Then place the fourth wineglass in the middle of the triangle, upside down.
mony..let me actually do it..
i am going in my kitchen now!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOO :o :o :o Boom is that u??!!!
lol..u changed ur nick?!! i didnt know it was u ;D
and hahaha yea try it...
-
ok here is another riddle..if u solve it ill give it to u :D
Place the first three in an equilateral triangle so that the foot of each is the same distance from the others as the height of a wineglass. Then place the fourth wineglass in the middle of the triangle, upside down.
r u sure u posted da right riddle??
-
ok here is another riddle..if u solve it ill give it to u :D
Place the first three in an equilateral triangle so that the foot of each is the same distance from the others as the height of a wineglass. Then place the fourth wineglass in the middle of the triangle, upside down.
mony..let me actually do it..
i am going in my kitchen now!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOO :o :o :o Boom is that u??!!!
lol..u changed ur nick?!! i didnt know it was u ;D
and hahaha yea try it...
good isnt it!!
-
ok here is another riddle..if u solve it ill give it to u :D
Place the first three in an equilateral triangle so that the foot of each is the same distance from the others as the height of a wineglass. Then place the fourth wineglass in the middle of the triangle, upside down.
r u sure u posted da right riddle??
hahahaha..YEAHHHHHHHH I DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D ;D ;D
How can you arrange four ordinary wineglasses on an ordinary table so that "foot" (center of the bottom of the stem) of each is the same distance from all the others? (this is the qustion) ;D
hahaha....so ill post another one ;D
-
ok here is another riddle..if u solve it ill give it to u :D
Place the first three in an equilateral triangle so that the foot of each is the same distance from the others as the height of a wineglass. Then place the fourth wineglass in the middle of the triangle, upside down.
mony..let me actually do it..
i am going in my kitchen now!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOO :o :o :o Boom is that u??!!!
lol..u changed ur nick?!! i didnt know it was u ;D
and hahaha yea try it...
good isnt it!!
Well yeah it is good..but people will not know u....ask me about it ;D i changed my nick 3 times... :D
-
ok here is another riddle..if u solve it ill give it to u :D
Place the first three in an equilateral triangle so that the foot of each is the same distance from the others as the height of a wineglass. Then place the fourth wineglass in the middle of the triangle, upside down.
r u sure u posted da right riddle??
hahahaha..YEAHHHHHHHH I DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D ;D ;D
How can you arrange four ordinary wineglasses on an ordinary table so that "foot" (center of the bottom of the stem) of each is the same distance from all the others? (this is the qustion) ;D
hahaha....so ill post another one ;D
hahaha NO U DIDNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
U POSTED DA ANS INSTEAD OF A QUESTION!! :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
-
ok here is another riddle..if u solve it ill give it to u :D
Place the first three in an equilateral triangle so that the foot of each is the same distance from the others as the height of a wineglass. Then place the fourth wineglass in the middle of the triangle, upside down.
mony..let me actually do it..
i am going in my kitchen now!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOO :o :o :o Boom is that u??!!!
lol..u changed ur nick?!! i didnt know it was u ;D
and hahaha yea try it...
good isnt it!!
Well yeah it is good..but people will not know u....ask me about it ;D i changed my nick 3 times... :D
but i gav them a clue...
that boom which i wrote...........
-
Well my name first was Monica....and the called me Mony...yet people still asked me about this name Monica (is it ur real name? r u a muslim...and etc..) so i changed it to Shoshou (my real nickname in reall life)... many didnt like it..that is why i did this voting up there...and they didnt know me although i wrote down that i am Monica :( so i changed it to Both at the end Shoshou...Mony :D
and Well yea i like this one..but i am sure people wont know u at first... :-\
-
and ill post another riddle now..since i gave the answer by mistake :(
-
Well my name first was Monica....and the called me Mony...yet people still asked me about this name Monica (is it ur real name? r u a muslim...and etc..) so i changed it to Shoshou (my real nickname in reall life)... many didnt like it..that is why i did this voting up there...and they didnt know me although i wrote down that i am Monica :( so i changed it to Both at the end Shoshou...Mony :D
and Well yea i like this one..but i am sure people wont know u at first... :-\
yea..its cool.........but mony...suits u more..............
well.........let them guess now!!! ;D ;D ;D
-
well yea i like Mony even more but it is nuthin like my real life name ;D and Roxy was the first one who gave me this nick :D I MISS HER!!!!!!!!!!
some like shoshou more....like Abdo, Sweetsh, Q80....(they call me shosh..shoshou..) :P
and here is an easy riddle:
How many times can you subtract 5 from 25?
-
well yea i like Mony even more but it is nuthin like my real life name ;D and Roxy was the first one who gave me this nick :D I MISS HER!!!!!!!!!!
some like shoshou more....like Abdo, Sweetsh, Q80....(they call me shosh..shoshou..) :P
and here is an easy riddle:
How many times can you subtract 5 from 25?
i think only once..cuz..aftr that it no longer remains 25...
-
Is there any riddle which i post that u dont solve it??!! :'( :'( :'(y
-
Is there any riddle which i post that u dont solve it??!! :'( :'( :'(y
HAHAHAHA/................................
I AM BOOM ALMIGHTY!!!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
actually it was 1 of my kind.....................remember i posted that riddle of school bag..
it is similar to that!!!
-
JAMes BoOom
007!!!
No i have to call u JamEs
?? ::) ::) ::) ::)
-
JAMes BoOom
007!!!
No i have to call u JamEs
?? ::) ::) ::) ::)
UPTO U!!
-
JAMes BoOom
007!!!
No i have to call u JamEs
?? ::) ::) ::) ::)
UPTO U!!
sochlo:P
-
JAMes BoOom
007!!!
No i have to call u JamEs
?? ::) ::) ::) ::)
UPTO U!!
sochlo:P
MANA BEBE..ME Aap se darta nahe!!!!
-
JAMes BoOom
007!!!
No i have to call u JamEs
?? ::) ::) ::) ::)
UPTO U!!
sochlo:P
MANA BEBE..ME Aap se darta nahe!!!!
woh pata hay but i wont say what i wish too
Ill call u boOom anyways:D
-
JAMes BoOom
007!!!
No i have to call u JamEs
?? ::) ::) ::) ::)
UPTO U!!
sochlo:P
MANA BEBE..ME Aap se darta nahe!!!!
woh pata hay but i wont say what i wish too
Ill call u boOom anyways:D
anyways.. ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
-
Who're u dancing with:P
-
Who're u dancing with:P
with u sweet heart!! :P :P :P :P
-
Who're u dancing with:P
with u sweet heart!! :P :P :P :P
me dance with u
naaah:P
-
Who're u dancing with:P
with u sweet heart!! :P :P :P :P
me dance with u
naaah:P
well..u dont even noe how to dance like that.............
i was forced to dance in my skool....
u noe they teach us that western classical dance..
-
Who're u dancing with:P
with u sweet heart!! :P :P :P :P
me dance with u
naaah:P
well..u dont even noe how to dance like that.............
i was forced to dance in my skool....
u noe they teach us that western classical dance..
ya i do sorta...not professionally thoght i want too
oh really u did how did that go?
-
Who're u dancing with:P
with u sweet heart!! :P :P :P :P
me dance with u
naaah:P
well..u dont even noe how to dance like that.............
i was forced to dance in my skool....
u noe they teach us that western classical dance..
ya i do sorta...not professionally thoght i want too
oh really u did how did that go?
went good..
lol..they say how will u dance with ur wife on ur wedding ....
as u noe there style.....
-
Who're u dancing with:P
with u sweet heart!! :P :P :P :P
me dance with u
naaah:P
well..u dont even noe how to dance like that.............
i was forced to dance in my skool....
u noe they teach us that western classical dance..
ya i do sorta...not professionally thoght i want too
oh really u did how did that go?
went good..
lol..they say how will u dance with ur wife on ur wedding ....
as u noe there style.....
ya i nkw i was watching a move todat om MBC max i guess it was based on it
n OMG i wanted to join those classrs soo bad!!!
but i dont think they have it here
-
Who're u dancing with:P
with u sweet heart!! :P :P :P :P
me dance with u
naaah:P
well..u dont even noe how to dance like that.............
i was forced to dance in my skool....
u noe they teach us that western classical dance..
ya i do sorta...not professionally thoght i want too
oh really u did how did that go?
went good..
lol..they say how will u dance with ur wife on ur wedding ....
as u noe there style.....
ya i nkw i was watching a move todat om MBC max i guess it was based on it
n OMG i wanted to join those classrs soo bad!!!
but i dont think they have it here
mana..no its a misery..........
i hate dancing......................
dont be proud of that western dance yaar................
ur eyes r closed............U LIVE IN A COMFORT OF DELUSION !!!!
-
Who're u dancing with:P
with u sweet heart!! :P :P :P :P
me dance with u
naaah:P
well..u dont even noe how to dance like that.............
i was forced to dance in my skool....
u noe they teach us that western classical dance..
ya i do sorta...not professionally thoght i want too
oh really u did how did that go?
went good..
lol..they say how will u dance with ur wife on ur wedding ....
as u noe there style.....
ya i nkw i was watching a move todat om MBC max i guess it was based on it
n OMG i wanted to join those classrs soo bad!!!
but i dont think they have it here
mana..no its a misery..........
i hate dancing......................
dont be proud of that western dance yaar................
ur eyes r closed............U LIVE IN A COMFORT OF DELUSION !!!!
No boom i live in a reality world!!
n i never went to a dance lesson but u knw sometime u get those swings
n yaa i am free move knda perosn
-
Who're u dancing with:P
with u sweet heart!! :P :P :P :P
me dance with u
naaah:P
well..u dont even noe how to dance like that.............
i was forced to dance in my skool....
u noe they teach us that western classical dance..
ya i do sorta...not professionally thoght i want too
oh really u did how did that go?
went good..
lol..they say how will u dance with ur wife on ur wedding ....
as u noe there style.....
ya i nkw i was watching a move todat om MBC max i guess it was based on it
n OMG i wanted to join those classrs soo bad!!!
but i dont think they have it here
mana..no its a misery..........
i hate dancing......................
dont be proud of that western dance yaar................
ur eyes r closed............U LIVE IN A COMFORT OF DELUSION !!!!
No boom i live in a reality world!!
n i never went to a dance lesson but u knw sometime u get those swings
n yaa i am free move knda perosn
mana.....if u r rong u hav to admit it!!!
Y DO U ALWAYS JUSTIFY UR SELF!!!
hmmm---i will consider it as typical girl quality!!!
-
I am sure i am not under the catagery of TIPICAL girl n i can proove it tooo
n no wait where wa si worng??
-
I am sure i am not under the catagery of TIPICAL girl n i can proove it tooo
n no wait where wa si worng??
who!!
noes!!
-
I am sure i am not under the catagery of TIPICAL girl n i can proove it tooo
n no wait where wa si worng??
who!!
noes!!
HUH :o :o :o :o ??? ???
-
I am sure i am not under the catagery of TIPICAL girl n i can proove it tooo
n no wait where wa si worng??
who!!
noes!!
HUH :o :o :o :o ??? ???
stop doing that
-
I am sure i am not under the catagery of TIPICAL girl n i can proove it tooo
n no wait where wa si worng??
who!!
noes!!
HUH :o :o :o :o ??? ???
stop doing that
dude i dont get what u said
-
I am sure i am not under the catagery of TIPICAL girl n i can proove it tooo
n no wait where wa si worng??
who!!
noes!!
HUH :o :o :o :o ??? ???
stop doing that
dude i dont get what u said
U WILL NEVER GET IT!!!
leave it!!
ur a kid!
-
I am sure i am not under the catagery of TIPICAL girl n i can proove it tooo
n no wait where wa si worng??
who!!
noes!!
HUH :o :o :o :o ??? ???
stop doing that
dude i dont get what u said
U WILL NEVER GET IT!!!
leave it!!
ur a kid!
Good way to end this discussion anyways!
-
I am sure i am not under the catagery of TIPICAL girl n i can proove it tooo
n no wait where wa si worng??
who!!
noes!!
HUH :o :o :o :o ??? ???
stop doing that
dude i dont get what u said
U WILL NEVER GET IT!!!
leave it!!
ur a kid!
Good way to end this discussion anyways!
yea..cuz i dont want u to cry in da end!!
-
*sighs*
i am Not Soo emotional or
stupid enough to take ur words SERIOUSLY
-
*sighs*
i am Not Soo emotional or
stupid enough to take ur words SERIOUSLY
LOOK WHO;S TALKING!!!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D :P :P :P :P
hahahaha..
-
Again Boom is mean to Manah >:(
-
Again Boom is mean to Manah >:(
mony its JUST THAT U HAV A LOW TEMPER CAPACITY!!!!!!!
U ALWAYS EQUATE UR SELF WITH OTHERS...............
we wr joking!!!!!!
-
Again Boom is mean to Manah >:(
mony its JUST THAT U HAV A LOW TEMPER CAPACITY!!!!!!!
U ALWAYS EQUATE UR SELF WITH OTHERS...............
we wr joking!!!!!!
oh yea??!! well i replied to u in the Family thread :P
-
Again Boom is mean to Manah >:(
mony its JUST THAT U HAV A LOW TEMPER CAPACITY!!!!!!!
U ALWAYS EQUATE UR SELF WITH OTHERS...............
we wr joking!!!!!!
oh yea??!! well i replied to u in the Family thread :P
AND SO DID I!!!
-
Yes thanx..i read it...Good Night Brother ;)
-
JoKes n RiDdLes
-
A headless man wrote a letter. A blind man read it. A dumb man read it word for word. A deaf man heard it. How is this possible?
-
A headless man wrote a letter. A blind man read it. A dumb man read it word for word. A deaf man heard it. How is this possible?
looooooooooool
my cousin asked me last year.in pk,
shall i tell!!
-
A headless man wrote a letter. A blind man read it. A dumb man read it word for word. A deaf man heard it. How is this possible?
looooooooooool
my cousin asked me last year.in pk,
shall i tell!!
no den u don't tll....let summon els try..
-
u do this one...
what qeustion can you never answer yes to
-
u do this one...
what qeustion can you never answer yes to
SO SIMPLE..........."R U DEAD" OR "R U SLEEP"
-
u do this one...
what qeustion can you never answer yes to
SO SIMPLE..........."R U DEAD" OR "R U SLEEP"
nope
-
u do this one...
what qeustion can you never answer yes to
SO SIMPLE..........."R U DEAD" OR "R U SLEEP"
nope
ok...logically...its correct.......
-
ok then..no question that you cannot answer yes to >:( >:( ;D ;D ;D ;D
wat if ur lying
-
u do this one...
what qeustion can you never answer yes to
SO SIMPLE..........."R U DEAD" OR "R U SLEEP"
nope
ok...logically...its correct.......
nope...logically also its nt rite!
get it urself...cz imma nt explain it..
yalla giv up if u dunt kno
-
ok then..no question that you cannot answer yes to >:( >:( ;D ;D ;D ;D
wat if ur lying
haha...caught u!!
u dunno so it doesnt mean ders no such q!
so do i take it as a GIVE UP?
-
ok..zara...here is da ans..
IF U ASK ME THIS QUESTION"HEY,BOOM DO U LOVE ME?"
this is da q lol ;D ;D ;D which i can NEVER SAY YES TO!!!.....
SO I NAILED IT!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :D :D :D :D :D
-
ok..zara...here is da ans..
IF U ASK ME THIS QUESTION"HEY,BOOM DO U LOVE ME?"
this is da q lol ;D ;D ;D which i can NEVER SAY YES TO!!!.....
SO I NAILED IT!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :D :D :D :D :D
yea i kno...none of ma bros luv me except ma cousin!! :'(
waise this is nt the standard ans!
-
Q>what qeustion can you never answer yes to
A>yes
loll..
-
If a rooster was on top of a roof and layed a egg and the wind blew which side would the egg land the left or the right?
-
If a rooster was on top of a roof and layed a egg and the wind blew which side would the egg land the left or the right?
lol..zara..rooster dont lay eggs!! ;D ;D
-
If a rooster was on top of a roof and layed a egg and the wind blew which side would the egg land the left or the right?
RosstERs....Not Chicken :P
-
If a rooster was on top of a roof and layed a egg and the wind blew which side would the egg land the left or the right?
lol..zara..rooster dont lay eggs!! ;D ;D
yup!
afta all u must knoing well! ;)
-
If a rooster was on top of a roof and layed a egg and the wind blew which side would the egg land the left or the right?
lol..zara..rooster dont lay eggs!! ;D ;D
yup!
afta all u must knoing well! ;)
::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
-
If a rooster was on top of a roof and layed a egg and the wind blew which side would the egg land the left or the right?
lol..zara..rooster dont lay eggs!! ;D ;D
yup!
afta all u must knoing well! ;)
::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
wat do i take it as? u got it or not?
lollzzz.................... :D :D :D :D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
-
If a rooster was on top of a roof and layed a egg and the wind blew which side would the egg land the left or the right?
lol..zara..rooster dont lay eggs!! ;D ;D
yup!
afta all u must knoing well! ;)
::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
wat do i take it as? u got it or not?
lollzzz.................... :D :D :D :D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
WATEVER U WANNA TAKE IT AS..TAKE IT!!!!!!!
-
If a rooster was on top of a roof and layed a egg and the wind blew which side would the egg land the left or the right?
lol..zara..rooster dont lay eggs!! ;D ;D
yup!
afta all u must knoing well! ;)
::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
wat do i take it as? u got it or not?
lollzzz.................... :D :D :D :D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
WATEVER U WANNA TAKE IT AS..TAKE IT!!!!!!!
HAHA!! DAT U GOT IT!!!
-
okay take this one!
Two fathers and two sons go fishing at a lake. In the lake there are only tree fish and each person had a fish when they left the lake. How is this possible?
-
okay take this one!
Two fathers and two sons go fishing at a lake. In the lake there are only tree fish and each person had a fish when they left the lake. How is this possible?
Two sone shared a fish :S
-
okay take this one!
Two fathers and two sons go fishing at a lake. In the lake there are only tree fish and each person had a fish when they left the lake. How is this possible?
Two sone shared a fish :S
nope! no sharing!
-
okay take this one!
Two fathers and two sons go fishing at a lake. In the lake there are only tree fish and each person had a fish when they left the lake. How is this possible?
Two sone shared a fish :S
nope! no sharing!
HOww kitnay jkkanjoos hain
pata nahin sharing say Allah ke rehmat hoti hay
tch tch tch tch :D
-
okay take this one!
Two fathers and two sons go fishing at a lake. In the lake there are only tree fish and each person had a fish when they left the lake. How is this possible?
Two sone shared a fish :S
nope! no sharing!
HOww kitnay jkkanjoos hain
pata nahin sharing say Allah ke rehmat hoti hay
tch tch tch tch :D
LMAO!
haan sweetie liken yahan per aisa kuch nai!
its a very tricky ques!
lets see if boom answers!(w/o cheating)
-
wat if there was a grandpa dad and son the grandpa was a dad the dad was a dad and a son and the son was a son!!!
yea..i think this is correct!!! :P :P :P :P
-
wat if there was a grandpa dad and son the grandpa was a dad the dad was a dad and a son and the son was a son!!!
yea..i think this is correct!!! :P :P :P :P
yup! ;D
buh u sure u didnt CHEAT??!!!
-
wat if there was a grandpa dad and son the grandpa was a dad the dad was a dad and a son and the son was a son!!!
yea..i think this is correct!!! :P :P :P :P
Why didnt i thought it that way!?
Uffh hate riddles
chalo ill be active in this thread so that i can imporve my riddle skills:)
-
What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries?
-
wat if there was a grandpa dad and son the grandpa was a dad the dad was a dad and a son and the son was a son!!!
yea..i think this is correct!!! :P :P :P :P
yup! ;D
buh u sure u didnt CHEAT??!!!
no..few months back i went to a dinner with my friends ..so we all wr discussing...so..they told.. ;D ;D ;D ;D
-
::)
-
What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries?
i sponge................
or a towel!!! ;)
-
::)
acha choro boom ko...u answer ma riddle....its up!
-
okay nvm...boom oredy answered....
yea boombo!! ur rite! a towel!
wait lemme find sum riddles for U!! ::)
-
xan some1 ask me???
dude its not fair
boom be quite n let me answer please?
-
The person who makes me has no need for me The person who buys me doesnt use me The person who is using me doesnt know What am I?
-
xan some1 ask me???
dude its not fair
boom be quite n let me answer please?
ok..zaytoon bano!!!
-
xan some1 ask me???
dude its not fair
boom be quite n let me answer please?
ok..zaytoon bano!!!
haha...lol!!
shes a character in dil diya dehleez rite? lmao
-
xan some1 ask me???
dude its not fair
boom be quite n let me answer please?
ok..zaytoon bano!!!
haha...lol!!
shes a character in dil diya dehleez rite? lmao
lol..yea..do u watch it.......
i love it!!!!
mana ur mutrba!!!
-
xan some1 ask me???
dude its not fair
boom be quite n let me answer please?
ok..zaytoon bano!!!
haha...lol!!
shes a character in dil diya dehleez rite? lmao
YuP Uggh
Javria Abbasi
wasey Boom how did u remeber herL:P
-
The person who makes me has no need for me The person who buys me doesnt use me The person who is using me doesnt know What am I?
Quran :-[
-
xan some1 ask me???
dude its not fair
boom be quite n let me answer please?
ok..zaytoon bano!!!
haha...lol!!
shes a character in dil diya dehleez rite? lmao
YuP Uggh
Javria Abbasi
wasey Boom how did u remeber herL:P
HER INTENTIONS IN DA DRAMA RESEMBLES URS!! 8) :P :P :P
so i remembeered
-
xan some1 ask me???
dude its not fair
boom be quite n let me answer please?
ok..zaytoon bano!!!
haha...lol!!
shes a character in dil diya dehleez rite? lmao
lol..yea..do u watch it.......
i love it!!!!
mana ur mutrba!!!
I LUV IT!!
AUR ISSI KI WAJA SE TAU MERI ROUTINE KHARAB HUI HAI... :( IT CUMS AT MAGHRIB TYM N SO I CANT WATCH IT....LATE NITE 12 30 AATA HAI...SIGHS...WAISE AJJ MAYBE SHELL DIE...NAZ... :'(
-
xan some1 ask me???
dude its not fair
boom be quite n let me answer please?
ok..zaytoon bano!!!
haha...lol!!
shes a character in dil diya dehleez rite? lmao
YuP Uggh
Javria Abbasi
wasey Boom how did u remeber herL:P
HER INTENTIONS IN DA DRAMA RESEMBLES URS!! 8) :P :P :P
so i remembeered
Not AT all I hate that character in the Drama!!
UfH
-
The person who makes me has no need for me The person who buys me doesnt use me The person who is using me doesnt know What am I?
Quran :-[
NOPE.....OK..FOR SUM PPL ITS like DAT BUH NT ALL... :)
GIMME THE RITE ANS
-
The person who makes me has no need for me The person who buys me doesnt use me The person who is using me doesnt know What am I?
Quran :-[
UR DA DUMBEST PERSON IN DA WORLD IF U DONT ANS THIS!!!!!
-
The person who makes me has no need for me The person who buys me doesnt use me The person who is using me doesnt know What am I?
Quran :-[
UR DA DUMBEST PERSON IN DA WORLD IF U DONT ANS THIS!!!!!
a riddle canot determin if i am one or not!
-
The person who makes me has no need for me The person who buys me doesnt use me The person who is using me doesnt know What am I?
Quran :-[
UR DA DUMBEST PERSON IN DA WORLD IF U DONT ANS THIS!!!!!
a riddle canot determin if i am one or not!
EXACTLY BOOMBO!
-
a coffin?
-
a coffin?
yaayy!!! ;D
-
A man was put into a cell in which there was no way that he could escape. However he was given a mirror and a bench and was told to escape. How can this be?
-
i bet even boom cant answer unless he googles!
-
okay try to asnwer this one....imma goin for lunch..bye
-
i bet even boom cant answer unless he googles!
U THINK I AM CHEATING..F9
I WONT ANS ANY OF THEM!!!!
-
i bet even boom cant answer unless he googles!
U THINK I AM CHEATING..F9
I WONT ANS ANY OF THEM!!!!
em bak!
nai yaar i neva said k ur cheating!!
i said dat u also wont b able to ans unless u google n type in!!
afta all wat can b expected frm u? 14 ya 15 pata nai kitne subs diye hein....phew!
-
SO NOONE TO ANSWER THIS ONE?? :-\
-
here again i post it...
A man was put into a cell in which there was no way that he could escape. However he was given a mirror and a bench and was told to escape. How can this be?
-
its sumthing related /.
he sees someting 4m the mirros n then he sees what he saw
so he takes rthe saw n cut somthing :-\
i really cant remember but its kindas what i said :-\
-
its sumthing related /.
he sees someting 4m the mirros n then he sees what he saw
so he takes rthe saw n cut somthing :-\
i really cant remember but its kindas what i said :-\
yup u got it!!
First of all look into the mirror see what you saw? The saw that you see take it and cut the bech into two. Two halves make one whole. The whole that you see go through it. And there he has escaped.
i neva wud hv guessed this ans...lol
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
ummmm....Water??!!
-
ill post some jokes now..since i am bored!! :D
-
ill post some jokes now..since i am bored!! :D
sure.. ;)
-
Bedside Manners
Susie's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months. Things looked grim, but she was by his bedside every single day. One day as he slipped back into consciousness, he motioned for her to come close to him. She pulled the chair close to the bed and leaned her ear close to be able to hear him.
"You know" he whispered, his eyes filling with tears, "you have been with me through all the bad times. When I got fired, you stuck right beside me. When my business went under, there you were. When we lost the house, you were there. When I got shot, you stuck with me. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. "And you know what?"
"What, dear?" she asked gently, smiling to herself.
"I think you're bad luck."
hahaha :D
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
THE LETTER "A"
-
The Real Definition of Words When Used By Women
Fine - I am right. This argument is over. You need to shut up.
That's Okay - One of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. "That's okay" means she wants to think hard and long before deciding when and how you'll pay for your mistake.
Nothing - The calm before the storm. This means "Something" and you better be on your toes. Note: Arguments that start with "Nothing" usually end with "Fine" (See #1).
Five Minutes - If getting dress, this means half an hour. (Don't be mad about this. It's the same definition for you when it's your turn to do some chores around the house.
Thanks - A woman is thanking you. Do not question this or faint. Just say, "You're welcome," and let it go.
Loud Sigh - Not actually a word but rather a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. It means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is standing here wasting her time arguing with you about "Nothing." (See #3)
Go Ahead - This is a dare, not permission. (Don't Do It!)
Don't worry about it, I got it - The second most dangerous statement a woman can make. It means that a woman has asked a man several times to do something and is now doing it herself. (This will result in you asking at a later date, "What's wrong?" For the woman's response, see #3.)
hahaha..so much not true...hahaha :D
-
Differences Between Man and Women :P
Names
If Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara.
If John, Brad, Tony and Daniel go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Bruno, Scrappy, Peanut-Head and Godzilla.
Eating Out
When the bill arrives, John, Brad, Tony and Daniel will each throw in $20, even though the total is only $34.25. None of them will have any smaller bills and none will admit they want change back.
When Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
Money
A man will pay $10 for a $5 item he needs.
A woman will pay $5 for a $10 item that she doesn't need, because it's on sale.
Bathrooms
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, razor, shaving cream, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Motel 6.
The average number of items in a woman's bathroom is 328. The average man would not be able to identify most of them.
......... :D
-
Arguments
Women always have the last word in an argument. Anything a man adds after that is the beginning of a new argument.
Cats
Women love cats.
Men may say they love cats, but when women are not looking, will men kick cats.
Future
A woman worries about the future -- until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future -- until he gets a wife.
SuccessA successful man is one who makes more money than can be spent by his wife.
A successful woman is one who can find that a man.
-
HOROSCOPE OF FARTS......
CONTINUED.........................
SNEAKY - Farts and blames it on the dog.
DISAPPOINTED - Their farts don't stink.
FRESH GUY - Jumps in front of you and farts.
BIG BULLY - Farts louder than everyone else.
DELUDED - Enjoys all farts thinking they are their own.
CUTE - Discovers from farts what others have eaten.
WISE - Farts and say's "Who in hell sh*t ??"
DAMNED MEAN - Farts in bed and pulls covers over wife's head.
MUSICAL - Tenor or bass Clear as a bell......Smells like sh*t Sounds like hell.
HONEST - Farts and blames in on the hostess.
LIVELY - Jumps in air, farts three times, kicks like hell simultaneously.
-
Marriage
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
Dressing Up
A woman will dress up when she goes shopping, empties the garbage, answers the phone, waters the plants, gets the mail and reads a book.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
Natural
Men wake up looking as good as when they went to bed.
Women will somehow deteriorate during the night.
Children
A woman knows all about her children. She knows about their best friends, romances, secret hopes and dreams, favorite foods, fears and dental appointments.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
Thought for the Day
Married men should forget their mistakes. There is no need for two people to remember the same thing.
-
I am bored od posting jokes ;D
hope u like them Manah..Zara..when u get back :D
shohsou off now..
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
THE LETTER "A"
nope! this is nt da ans!
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
ummmm....Water??!!
nope hun!
-
I am bored od posting jokes ;D
hope u like them Manah..Zara..when u get back :D
shohsou off now..
haha...jokes?
its tru...loll... :D :D :D
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
They all have the Letter "A" :-\
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
ummmm....Water??!!
nope hun!
No...?? not even the letter A??!!
hmmmmmm...then...wats the answer??!!!!!!!!
-
Zara read ur PM!!!!
its a joke but not appropriate :-\
-
Acha let me ask u soome humours questions Ok!?
1. What did the lonely banana say?
2. What did the green peas say? Nothing.
3. What did the potato say when it answered the phone
4. Where do cabbages hang out?
5. What are call boxes for ghosts called?
6. What did the flower say to its girl friend?
7. What did the fat car say?
8. What did the confused egg say?
9. What do shrimps sing on Christmas?
10. What did the half eaten naan say?
Ps.For those who know Urdu :)
-
Love v/s Marriage
Love is holding hands in the street
Marriage is holding arguments in the street
Love is dinner for 2 in your favorite restaurant
Marriage is a Chinese take-out
Love is cuddling on a sofa
Marriage is deciding on a sofa
Love is talking about having children
Marriage is talking about getting away from children
Love is going to bed early
Marriage is going to sleep early
Love is a romantic drive
Marriage is a tarmac drive
Love is losing your appetite
Marriage is losing your figure
Love is sweet nothing in the ear
Marriage is sweet nothing in the bank
Love is a flickering flame
Marriage is a flickering television
Love is 1 drink and 2 straws
Marriage is "Don't you think you've had enough!"
In short, love is blind, marriage is an eye opener!!!
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
ummmm....Water??!!
nope hun!
paper towel???????
No...?? not even the letter A??!!
hmmmmmm...then...wats the answer??!!!!!!!!
the answer is...........
TOWEL!!
-
There is a bus full of people travelling over San Francisco and no one gets off the bus throughoutthe journey. But when it gets to the other side there is not a single person left. How is thispossible?
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
ummmm....Water??!!
nope hun!
paper towel???????
No...?? not even the letter A??!!
hmmmmmm...then...wats the answer??!!!!!!!!
the answer is...........
TOWEL!!
hey mana y does it show dat "last edit by mana"?
-
beach, paper and bath-what do these items have in common?
ummmm....Water??!!
nope hun!
paper towel???????
No...?? not even the letter A??!!
hmmmmmm...then...wats the answer??!!!!!!!!
the answer is...........
TOWEL!!
hey mana y does it show dat "last edit by mana"?
cuz i wanted to quote but i press Modify butoom Sorry for that@!!!!!
-
okay no probs...4get it ...u now ans ma riddle so dat i cn post mor
-
here again!
There is a bus full of people travelling over San Francisco and no one gets off the bus throughoutthe journey. But when it gets to the other side there is not a single person left. How is this possible?
-
here again!
There is a bus full of people travelling over San Francisco and no one gets off the bus throughoutthe journey. But when it gets to the other side there is not a single person left. How is this possible?
thats because theyre all married, and theres no "single" ppl :P
-
^hahahahaaaaaa
-
^_^
-
here again!
There is a bus full of people travelling over San Francisco and no one gets off the bus throughoutthe journey. But when it gets to the other side there is not a single person left. How is this possible?
thats because theyre all married, and theres no "single" ppl :P
v gud abdo! hope u didnt google?! O_o
-
i dunno if u can c i dunno if u can speak i dunno if u can walk/run i dunno if u can hear i dunno if u can feel but i no 1 thing u are not human u are not alive u are not anything what am i?
-
i dunno if u can c i dunno if u can speak i dunno if u can walk/run i dunno if u can hear i dunno if u can feel but i no 1 thing u are not human u are not alive u are not anything what am i?
ghosts
-
i dunno if u can c i dunno if u can speak i dunno if u can walk/run i dunno if u can hear i dunno if u can feel but i no 1 thing u are not human u are not alive u are not anything what am i?
ghosts
nope
-
yo peeps!!
y is this dead??
ANSWER THE RIDDLES!!
I HAVE HELL LOAD OF IT!!
YALLA..GET STARTED!
-
i dunno if u can c i dunno if u can speak i dunno if u can walk/run i dunno if u can hear i dunno if u can feel but i no 1 thing u are not human u are not alive u are not anything what am i?
mmm....angels??!!
or...air??!!
-
OK...GUYZ..I HAV GOT SOMETHING FRESH AND NEW 4 ALL OF ..U!!
HOW ABT PICTURE RIDDLES!!!
-
OK...GUYZ..I HAV GOT SOMETHING FRESH AND NEW 4 ALL OF ..U!!
HOW ABT PICTURE RIDDLES!!!
yeah that will be new and interesting!
-
i dunno if u can c i dunno if u can speak i dunno if u can walk/run i dunno if u can hear i dunno if u can feel but i no 1 thing u are not human u are not alive u are not anything what am i?
mmm....angels??!!
or...air??!!
nopz
-
OK...GUYZ..I HAV GOT SOMETHING FRESH AND NEW 4 ALL OF ..U!!
HOW ABT PICTURE RIDDLES!!!
sounds good...actually i was trying to get one hea buh the pic was nt cumin.... :-\ :-\
-
so shall i post..
da best thiong is that they r fun and V.V.V.VV EASY................AND ANYONE CAN GUESS!
-
okay!! get startd!!
-
ok here i go
-
the easiest one::
u hav to visualize it!!
-
then?
-
then?
tell me aftr seeing da pic.....................!!
wat is it!!
its a short statement..of 5 words(ans)
-
RED COLOR ONE WITH HOLE!!
loooollll
-
RED COLOR ONE WITH HOLE!!
loooollll
nyc..try very close....but no!
-
RED COLOR ONE WITH HOLE!!
loooollll
nyc..try very close....but no!
tch then wat??
wait lemme think...
-
here is another one!
-
wat to do for this one?
aur haan the answer for ur first one?
-
wat to do for this one?
aur haan the answer for ur first one?
same is 4 everyone,..........u hav to guess wat dapic is saying...
da ans:4 da 1 oneis:A HOLE IN ONE.....its a short statement...UR ANS WAS RONG.
-
wat to do for this one?
aur haan the answer for ur first one?
same is 4 everyone,..........u hav to guess wat dapic is saying...
da ans:4 da 1 oneis:A HOLE IN ONE.....its a short statement...UR ANS WAS RONG.
wasnt dat the same thing??
-
here is another one!
HURRY written diagonally in blue color
-
1st one, a white hole in one ?
-
wat to do for this one?
aur haan the answer for ur first one?
same is 4 everyone,..........u hav to guess wat dapic is saying...
da ans:4 da 1 oneis:A HOLE IN ONE.....its a short statement...UR ANS WAS RONG.
wasnt dat the same thing??
no..yaara..u hav to not describe everything....
u hav to figure out wat da pic is actually saying..
-
U DONT HAV TO DESCRIBE IT!!!
U HAV TO GUESS WAT DA PIC IS SAYING..
-
1st one, a red hole in one ?
haha....its nt dat...rather a hole in red one...wat i said buh its nt da standard answer.....infact ma answer is more descriptive....looll...
-
U DONT HAV TO DESCRIBE IT!!!
U HAV TO GUESS WAT DA PIC IS SAYING..
ohkkk!!
-
cummon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ans so i can post more!
-
ur 2nd one...
hurry written diagonally
-
2nd one is hurry up
-
2nd one is hurry up
BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!!!
thats ryte.
-
:-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[
-
imma bad at this...:(
neways post mor...
-
this is a gr8 one:
-
Obviously "You're under arrest"
-
you r under arrest!!
-
haha...i got it rite!!!!!!
-
lol astar :S
-
yo!! master also joined!!
-
yo zara ..
so u look at a picture nd think out of ur mind ...
-
yo zara ..
so u look at a picture nd think out of ur mind ...
yup....nt xactly think...look n rite w/e u see...loll
-
ok :)
as u say :P
-
zainy is on her way!!!! ;D ;D :D ;D :) :) :) 8) 8)
-
but i dint the a hole in one ..
wat does tht mean
-
buz..
-
2 little 2 late :D
-
I M RIGHT AM I :D
-
what does this mean..............................???
-
twenty twenty??
-
how is it twenty twenty ?
-
hello.. :D
wat are u people playin??!! :P
-
hullo mony!!
picture riddles!!
-
its a game ... u loo kat the picture boom posts... nd try to tell us wat it shows
-
zara xplain naa ... how did u fsay it is twenty twenty :P
kaise mila :P
-
ok... :D
now Boom post pics...i wanna join :P
-
see the last pic nd try finding tht out ..
zara isnt xplaining how she got the answer :(
-
zara xplain naa ... how did u fsay it is twenty twenty :P
kaise mila :P
lol...dude em nt even sure if its rite or no!!!!
well...kaise mila...umm....the letters r identical tau twins....looooooooooooooollll.....a wild guess..
twenty twenty....
whrs boooooooommmm????????!!!!!!!!!!!
-
WHERES EVERYONE?????!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
this riddle is mind boggling :P
mind busting
8)
-
twenty twenty??
RONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :P :P :P :P
-
did u get it right or u checked the answer :P
-
twenty twenty??
RONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :P :P :P :P
:-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ ::) ::) ::)
"TIIDTY TIIDTY" WATS THIS??!!!
-
i think its jumbled up :P nd the purple DI is impt too:P
-
i think its jumbled up :P nd the purple DI is impt too:P
haha...its red!! :P :P :P
-
cummon!!!!!
i wanna post more only if u slove it
-
but i see it purple :P
wat the hell :P
james are the words jumbled up
give us hints
-
but i see it purple :P
wat the hell :P
james are the words jumbled up
give us hints
EVERYTHING IS VERY CLEAR!!!
-
bleh i give up
-
yea speak up boom
-
WHATS GOING ON!! :D
-
picture riddle ! ! !
look at the picture nd tell us wat it says
-
WHATS GOING ON!! :D
booms askin picture riddles....just try out the latest one...
-
picture riddles hmm ok lemme try Goo boom:)
-
hes off now.....:S
-
he dint knowte answer ... :p
-
awwwwwwwwwwwwwww where did he goo
he is there!?
-
he dint knowte answer ... :p
haha...don't challenge him!!!
-
i m not :P
-
True Zara dont challenge him haha
By the way Master cheak the topic *the moderator *
-
ichecked...
those glitches are beyong my understanding nd for some reason zara is among glitches quite alot :P
-
Hahaha I guess computer dont likes her hahahahahah!!!
awwwe zara dont worry u're not the only 1
right master :P
-
yea lol ....its a particular group of ppl targetted...
i wonder wat they hav done ... such innocent group ppl they are :P
-
i know right "a bright rings sparks around her head" (A) haha
-
hahaha
indeed it did ..
may the force help ur ppl out :P
-
hmm
InshAllah.....=]
-
ok i m confused ...
-
about? ::)
-
the riddle :P
i really want to know the answer :P
i m staring at it nd nothing is cuming
*woooooooooot*
-
the riddle :P
i really want to know the answer :P
i m staring at it nd nothing is cuming
*woooooooooot*
which riddle? ???
-
ichecked...
those glitches are beyong my understanding nd for some reason zara is among glitches quite alot :P
glitches?? wats dat?? bug or sumthing?
-
yes bugs...little tiny bugs interefering in ppls lives
-
Hahaha I guess computer dont likes her hahahahahah!!!
awwwe zara dont worry u're not the only 1
right master :P
:( :( :( :( ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
-
:P
-
okfor somereason i m not able to use therote thing lik u ppl are ... can u xplain exactly how toquote :S
-
okfor somereason i m not able to use therote thing lik u ppl are ... can u xplain exactly how toquote :S
simple yaar...if u wanna quote den hit the quote button!!
-
okfor somereason i m not able to use therote thing lik u ppl are ... can u xplain exactly how toquote :S
click on the tab *quote* n then whent he reply thingi opens where[/quote] ends sart ur sentence from their or perhap[s another line which ever way u prefer
-
haan yaar tht i did ... but it doesnt quote nothing ...
its freaky :P
it just goes down to the quick reply place nd the cursor is there .. bus
-
WIRD ANOTHER TRIGGER I ASSUME! HAHA WELCOME TO THE CLUB!!
By the way WHERE IS BOOOOOOM :o :o
-
god knows where he is ....
he shud come nd tell the answer ....
cant wait XD
-
Loll u're curious to where he is :P
-
hell yea :P
he was eager to give more riddles....
nd nowhe dissappeared :(
-
I run right and stop Left then stop I scream at you I whisper upon you Im dead and alive again I clean myself after 60 and I wander walls usually What exactly am I?
-
a clock:O
an alarm clock
-
a clock:O
an alarm clock
yo!!
-
A man was born in 1955 how is it today is his 18th birthday?
-
u aksed a question abt 18rh birthday nd it was urpost number 1818 :P
kewl:P
-
u aksed a question abt 18rh birthday nd it was urpost number 1818 :P
kewl:P
lol yea!! i neva noticed...hehe
-
19:55 was the time :P
-
19:55 was the time :P
nope! "in" not "on"
-
cummon summon answer!!
-
i tried to add up 1 9 5 5 ... it becomes 20
so then i tired 5 + 5 + 9 -1 =18 :D
LOL
-
It as his hospital no !! :D
-
i tried to add up 1 9 5 5 ... it becomes 20
so then i tired 5 + 5 + 9 -1 =18 :D
LOL
nope...dats nt da ans
-
It as his hospital no !! :D
yaay manz!!
hi5!!
lol
-
ohh yea room numbeR:P
-
There is an ancient invention still used in some parts of the world today that allows people to see through walls. What is it?
-
ohh yea room numbeR:P
oh yea....loolll :D :D :D ;D ;D 8) 8)
-
glass
-
Hi10s:P
8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
-
glass
nopz
-
i feel stupid :P
-
Hi10s:P
8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
haha...it makes me remind of boom...loll
-
i feel stupid :P
loollzz.....den dont...cz me nt ne betta at these!!
-
looool :P
wats the answer ?
-
window..
-
Window
-
glass... window ..same thing ....
ppl refer to it as glass also ok
-
Forward Im heavy backwards Im not. What am I?
-
glass... window ..same thing ....
ppl refer to it as glass also ok
haha...realli...didnt knew...looooll
chalo answer da next one!!
-
Window
yo again!!
ill giv hi5 altogether l8r!!
loll
-
Forward Im heavy backwards Im not. What am I?
ton.
-
okay guys....iv got few mor posts to go den ill be among the top 10 posters!!!! ;D ;D
ryt now abdo is the at the least with 1839!! n em at 1833
-
weight
-
hmm i will ask one :P
maybe u ppl heard it
wats heavier .... a kilo or aluminium or a kilo of wool ?
-
Forward Im heavy backwards Im not. What am I?
ton.
yaay mana!!!
getting betta!! ;)
-
hmm i will ask one :P
maybe u ppl heard it
wats heavier .... a kilo or aluminium or a kilo of wool ?
aluminium?
-
haha no :o
-
they are both equal!! ;D
-
Forward Im heavy backwards Im not. What am I?
ton.
yaay mana!!!
getting betta!! ;)
Yaaay ME
-
lol RIGHT ..
-
they are both equal!! ;D
??? ??? ??? ???
-
oh...my answer is right??!! :D
ok..now anyone post more riddles!! or r are tired peopl?? :P
-
they both are a kilo each ....
so none are heavier
-
yes mony u r right..
very smart:P
-
What can kill all humans but save us too too much of it is bad but not enough is horrid?
-
*falls asleeep*
-
What can kill all humans but save us too too much of it is bad but not enough is horrid?
snakes??!! :P
-
*falls asleeep*
nai yaar!!
wake up!!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa*screaming* looll
-
What can kill all humans but save us too too much of it is bad but not enough is horrid?
snakes??!! :P
no
-
steroid :D
-
steroid :D
lol..no
-
*falls asleeep*
nai yaar!!
wake up!!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa*screaming* looll
*wide eye Open* what happenend!!!
-
yo everyone!!
imma among da top 10 posters!!!!!
-
air ? WATER?
-
*falls asleeep*
nai yaar!!
wake up!!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa*screaming* looll
*wide eye Open* what happenend!!!
haha....answer da riddles!!
-
air ? WATER?
no
-
give us hints zara..... :D
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh CONGRATZ ZARA!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D
-
screw u :P all of them are rong :|
-
Uuuh
SUN
-
give us hints zara..... :D
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh CONGRATZ ZARA!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D
thankz!!!!!
umm...hints...well.....i don't like it...loll....
-
CHEak out my rep yo
*rubs her eyes*
-
Uuuh
SUN
aiwa!!!
buh u said ur nt gud at all this...neways...get goin!!!
-
while i was sleeping hwat happened y is mOny sagn Congrats :S
MONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNY!!! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEy
-
CHEak out my rep yo
*rubs her eyes*
mashallah!!! :D
-
its been 10 for a while now
-
Uuuh
SUN
aiwa!!!
buh u said ur nt gud at all this...neways...get goin!!!
u see i was slepping n then i saw a SUn so i posed it :P
-
while i was sleeping hwat happened y is mOny sagn Congrats :S
MONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNY!!! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEy
lol...cz imma among da top 10 posters....:D
-
Uuuh
SUN
aiwa!!!
buh u said ur nt gud at all this...neways...get goin!!!
u see i was slepping n then i saw a SUn so i posed it :P
RIGHT!
-
top 10 poster where ?? huh is that n new cat, ??
n n master i was SLeeping i saw it n then i posted it hehehe
-
oh Helloooo Manah!! i missed u :D
we have to chat soon :D
-
top 10 poster where ?? huh is that n new cat, ??
n n master i was SLeeping i saw it n then i posted it hehehe
go n chk "more stats"...its at the homepage of sf...down...
-
Indeed we doo
So wasap up guys omg i am soo sleepy n i have to go 4 a dinner UgH!
-
ozay ppeps me is off from hea!!
maghrib!
allahafiz bbye Take care
-
MaBrok ZaRa
WeLcOmE to The ClUB!! 8) 8) 8)
-
oooh Bye Zara...bye sweety!! :-*
u know maghrib over here..is at 8 !!!! and isha at 9 :o
tooo late :D
-
oooh Bye Zara...bye sweety!! :-*
u know maghrib over here..is at 8 !!!! and isha at 9 :o
tooo late :D
inded it is soo ima leave to 4 magrib:)
-
did any one miss me~!!
-
did any one miss me~!!
MaNa did!!
where did u disappeared? :o ???
-
did any one miss me~!!
MaNa did!!
where did u disappeared? :o ???
YAAR I HAD TO GO TO DA STADIUM!!'''
URGENTLY..cuz we had a match!
-
ahha so how did it goo
By the way Be right back prayers
-
did any one miss me~!!
MaNa did!!
where did u disappeared? :o ???
YAAR I HAD TO GO TO DA STADIUM!!'''
URGENTLY..cuz we had a match!
cricket match or any other game?
-
did any one miss me~!!
MaNa did!!
where did u disappeared? :o ???
YAAR I HAD TO GO TO DA STADIUM!!'''
URGENTLY..cuz we had a match!
cricket match or any other game?
cricket!!!!!!!
and i took 2 smooth wickets/clean bolds.! ;D ;D ;D
so happy today!!!!!
-
did any one miss me~!!
MaNa did!!
where did u disappeared? :o ???
YAAR I HAD TO GO TO DA STADIUM!!'''
URGENTLY..cuz we had a match!
cricket match or any other game?
cricket!!!!!!!
and i took 2 smooth wickets/clean bolds.! ;D ;D ;D
so happy today!!!!!
thats great!
fast or spin bowling?
-
did any one miss me~!!
MaNa did!!
where did u disappeared? :o ???
YAAR I HAD TO GO TO DA STADIUM!!'''
URGENTLY..cuz we had a match!
cricket match or any other game?
cricket!!!!!!!
and i took 2 smooth wickets/clean bolds.! ;D ;D ;D
so happy today!!!!!
thats great!
fast or spin bowling?
no..yaar..i think its mid fast....
and yea,,in/out swing!!
-
Yaay BooM that good too hear:)
-
Yaay BooM that good too hear:)
THANX...
-
just see the picture!
(http://images.stupidvideos.com/images/2/00/22/60/57/226057_m730_____1.jpg)
CLASS IS CANCELLED>>>LOL!
-
just see the picture!
(http://images.stupidvideos.com/images/2/00/22/60/57/226057_m730_____1.jpg)
CLASS IS CANCELLED>>>LOL!
wooooooohoooooooooooooooooooooooo ;D
-
yo peeps...njoy da joke!!
A biology teacher wished to demonstrate to his students the harmful effects of alcohol on living organisms. For his experiment, he showed them a beaker with pond water in which there was a thriving civilization of worms. When he added some alcohol into the beaker the worms doubled-up and died.
"Now," he said, "what do you learn from this?"
An eager student gave his answer.
"Well the answer is obvious," he said "if you drink alcohol, you'll never have worms."
-
What is greater than God, More evil than the devil, The poor have it, The rich need it, And if you eat it, you'll die?
-
What is greater than God, More evil than the devil, The poor have it, The rich need it, And if you eat it, you'll die?
zara posted a queston with same prototype.....
AND ANS IS .........NOTHING!!!
-
yupe correct :)
-
Take away my first letter and I am unchanged;
Take away my second letter and I am unchanged;
Take away all my remaining letters and I am still unchanged!
What am I?
-
Take away my first letter and I am unchanged;
Take away my second letter and I am unchanged;
Take away all my remaining letters and I am still unchanged!
What am I?
i did taht one...
mail box.....
or a post office
-
Yup Correct
-
This thread is sooo much dead now :D
any one got anyyyyy Jokes or Riddles?!! :P
i got millions!!!of them :P :P :P
but then there should also be someone to do them
-
start posting,people would start answering =]
-
Pronounced as one letter,
And written with three,
Two letters there are,
And two only in me.
I'm double, I'm single,
I'm black, blue, and gray,
I'm read from both ends,
And the same either way.
What am I?
-
What other letter fits in the following series:
B C D E I K O X?
-
R?
H?
-
4 the last one,yes correct its H=]
-
What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a thousand years?
-
The letter M? Because it was mentioned in both words but not in"thousand years"
-
Correct
-
He starts and ends 2 common English words. One painful in love, one painful in everyday matter.
Do you know what 2 words I must be?
-
That's hard let me think
-
sure tyt :D
-
I am the beginning of the end, and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation, and I surround every place. What am I?
-
He starts and ends 2 common English words. One painful in love, one painful in everyday matter.
Do you know what 2 words I must be?
Heartache for the love thing? and headache for the daily matters? Not sure =S
-
I am the beginning of the end, and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation, and I surround every place. What am I?
"E"
-
Correct
U're good in it MashAllah=] ;)
-
Not always, the arabic ones i'm awful don't know why =]
-
lool=]
-
Eve: Adam, do you love me?
Adam: Who else?
-
hey!!
lol
i posted here 8) 8) 8) ;D 8) 8) :P :P
mony i miisss yew :( :-* :-*
-
There was a Packers fan with a really lame seat at Lambeau. Looking with his binoculars, he spotted an empty seat on the 50-yard line. Thinking to himself "what a waste" he made his way down to the empty seat.
When he arrived at the seat, he asked the man sitting next to it, "Is this seat taken?" The man replied, "This was my wife's seat. She passed away. She was a big Packers fan." The other man replied,"I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. May I ask why you didn't give the ticket to a friend or a relative?"
The man replied, "They're all at the funeral."
-
lol...nice 1 zara
-
lol...nice 1 zara
W,E!! :P :P :P
-
this thread is dead!!!!!
No one visits this place :o haunted thread :P
Come on..cant somebody post anyyyyyy jokes or riddles ::)
-
this thread is dead!!!!!
No one visits this place :o haunted thread :P
Come on..cant somebody post anyyyyyy jokes or riddles ::)
i noe.. loads....but i wont post :P
-
this thread is dead!!!!!
No one visits this place :o haunted thread :P
Come on..cant somebody post anyyyyyy jokes or riddles ::)
i noe.. loads....but i wont post :P
Are u trying to annoy me ::)
then..if u dont post..ill consider u the person who killed this thread!!!!!! :'(
Evil Brother :-[
-
this thread is dead!!!!!
No one visits this place :o haunted thread :P
Come on..cant somebody post anyyyyyy jokes or riddles ::)
i noe.. loads....but i wont post :P
u prob. knw loads tht r lame like SOME pple .. :P
-
this thread is dead!!!!!
No one visits this place :o haunted thread :P
Come on..cant somebody post anyyyyyy jokes or riddles ::)
i noe.. loads....but i wont post :P
u prob. knw loads tht r lame like SOME pple .. :P
yea..like LAME_TERRFIED!!! :P ;D
-
wwhy doesnt jus some1 post already..
hmmph...
-
wwhy doesnt jus some1 post already..
hmmph...
yea....maybe ill search for some and post later isa.... :D
-
wwhy doesnt jus some1 post already..
hmmph...
yea....maybe ill search for some and post later isa.... :D
lol okie.. :)
-
If it takes ten men 3 hours to dig one hole, how many men does it take to dig half a hole in the same amount of time.
-
If it takes ten men 3 hours to dig one hole, how many men does it take to dig half a hole in the same amount of time.
thtz soo wrong.. i mean it cnt be 1.5 unless one man works .5 hr more or smthin :-\ :-\
-
If it takes ten men 3 hours to dig one hole, how many men does it take to dig half a hole in the same amount of time.
thtz soo wrong.. i mean it cnt be 1.5 unless one man works .5 hr more or smthin :-\ :-\
loooool..thts soo wrong :P
-
If it takes ten men 3 hours to dig one hole, how many men does it take to dig half a hole in the same amount of time.
thtz soo wrong.. i mean it cnt be 1.5 unless one man works .5 hr more or smthin :-\ :-\
loooool..thts soo wrong :P
nooooooo the question is soooooooooooooo wrong hahaha
-
A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving all over the road. Eventually a cop pulls him over.
"Did you know," says the cop, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"
"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
-
If it takes ten men 3 hours to dig one hole, how many men does it take to dig half a hole in the same amount of time.
thtz soo wrong.. i mean it cnt be 1.5 unless one man works .5 hr more or smthin :-\ :-\
loooool..thts soo wrong :P
nooooooo the question is soooooooooooooo wrong hahaha
no
-
If it takes ten men 3 hours to dig one hole, how many men does it take to dig half a hole in the same amount of time.
thtz soo wrong.. i mean it cnt be 1.5 unless one man works .5 hr more or smthin :-\ :-\
loooool..thts soo wrong :P
nooooooo the question is soooooooooooooo wrong hahaha
no
it is naa..
-
A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving all over the road. Eventually a cop pulls him over.
"Did you know," says the cop, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"
"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
lol .. mean joke though ..
-
A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving all over the road. Eventually a cop pulls him over.
"Did you know," says the cop, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"
"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
hahahaha...ok ok his happy his wife is dead..how bad is he :P
-
this please is DEMENTED!
-
HERE'S a JOKE!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!
U laughed! :D :D :D
Congratulations
-
HERE'S a JOKE!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!
U laughed! :D :D :D
Congratulations
hahahaha..is that so??
do u have others then?? :P
-
YES i do
-
so wat are u waiting for?? post!!!!! :D
-
so wat are u waiting for?? post!!!!! :D
I think she needs a prsonal invitation :P
-
so wat are u waiting for?? post!!!!! :D
I think she needs a prsonal invitation :P
HAHAHAHA...ok here is another Joke from Roxy this time :P
wait until Mana sees this.. :P
-
CIE was in a sorry state. Everybody was switching to study the IB instead, and with the recession and the credit crucnh, well, CIE was bankupt. To pay their debts, there was to be a public auctioon to sell off CIE.
The interested parties - blackpapers, xtremepapers and freeexampapers crowded into the auction hall and the bidding started.
My Dad's a Sheik said blackpapers. He owns 1000 oil wells and runs the biggest hotel chain in Kuwait. I bid $100000
My Dad's a media magnate, said xtremepapers. He is very pleased I managed to bankupt CIE. He says it is training to take over the newspapers and TV statins. I bid $10000000000
Times are bad said freeexampapers. We lost $100000 last year and my country has to import the leftovers of the dinner tables of Saudi Arabia to feed the people. I can only bid 50p.
On the other hand, I have the money now.
-
hahaha nice joke astar ;)
-
ANother joke
HUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
SEEE U laughed again
hahaha :D :D :D :D
-
john is jack's father
and john is jack's father's ______
fill in the blank please
-
john is jack's father
and john is jack's father's ______
fill in the blank please
...
alter ego? :P
-
ANother joke
HUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
SEEE U laughed again
hahaha :D :D :D :D
pfftt... i didnt :P :P :P ::) :P
-
wrong
-
ANother joke
HUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
SEEE U laughed again
hahaha :D :D :D :D
pfftt... i didnt :P :P :P ::) :P
Perhaps u dont knowe how to then=]
-
an employer had interviewed a successful job candidate n all that was left was to decide the pay. the employer offered her one of two different packages. in the first one, she would receive $100 a day. in the second she would receive 1 cent the first day, 2 cents the second day, 4 cents the third day, 8 cents the fourth day, 16 cents the fifth day and so on. which salary package should she choose?
-
The second one?
-
tell me why the second one is better
-
More mOney=]
-
yeah.....
if she chose the first one, she would get 100*30=$3000 per month
but if she chose the second one, ashe would get (2^30)-1=$10737418.23 per month..........a millionaire in a month :o :o :D :D :D
so much the employer wouldnt be able to pay it much longer!
-
"feels Smart"
-
ANother joke
HUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
SEEE U laughed again
hahaha :D :D :D :D
pfftt... i didnt :P :P :P ::) :P
Perhaps u dont knowe how to then=]
i do.. but then this was lame ::) :P
-
Was it
Perhaps 4 u!
-
Was it
Perhaps 4 u!
hmm.. who knwz.. :P
-
ANother joke
HUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
SEEE U laughed again
hahaha :D :D :D :D
pfftt... i didnt :P :P :P ::) :P
Perhaps u dont knowe how to then=]
i do.. but then this was lame ::) :P
good one mana :P
got any more :D
-
Than 4 appreciating my effort to bring life in this thread SIGHS
uuh no i needa brainstorm hahahah!
-
Than 4 appreciating my effort to bring life in this thread SIGHS
uuh no i needa brainstorm hahahah!
Thanks for bringing Life!! :D
i will be posting later inshallah :D
-
K.....I HV NUTHNG 2 DU....so m gonna brng this thread 2 lyf n sk u all a riddle...... :D
Day b4 yesterday, i wz 25 yrs old. At da end of nxt yr I will b 28 yrs old. Wen is my birthday n what is da current date?
thnk n i ll soon give da answer ;)
-
i do not knw :S itz confusing.. :S
-
feb 29th :p is the birthday
nd current date is 2nd march :o
-
feb 29th :p is the birthday
nd current date is 2nd march :o
hw did u knw abt 2nd march ?? :S
-
i guessed the current date.... donno if its right
-
ooo.. :\ k
-
lolllzzz nooo.....gud try thou mohammed n yeah zainy...it is pretty confusing ;)
neway i ll giv da answers......
my bday wud b on 31st december........n..........da current date is 1st of january.....
hahaha....nw cn u thnk it thru da answers ;) :D ;D
-
27 feb :S:S
-
this topic will be up and running fom now on .. cause the owner said so .. and from my personal experience u dont want to disobey her .. she slaps :-X :P
come on guys post some stuff .. :P
-
this topic will be up and running fom now on .. cause the owner said so .. and from my personal experience u dont want to disobey her .. she slaps :-X :P
come on guys post some stuff .. :P
AHAHAHAHAHA....Yes yes..as Q80 said...he knows me very well..hahaha :P
Yallah post post..or else >:(
Peace :P
-
or else ?!?!
anywayz u should be happy i just posted here ::)
-
or else wat Q80 said :P :P
hahaha...thx Zainy...when I am free oneday ill post jokes :D
-
u can never dare to slap me
because if u doo.... bewaree..
-
hahaha..Can I do that through internet? :P
-
if u dare do tht .. through anywhere....
just bewaaaaaaarrreeeeeee ....
-
Are u giving me warnings...?
-
loooll yes :P
-
:'( :'( :'( I am sad now
-
huuuh??????
wattt in the world did i doooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
-
u warned me :P :P :P :P
hahaha..Jokes...its the joking thread :P
-
*staares* =_=
:P :P :P
-
hahaha..I laughed :P :P :P
okay..here is a riddle easy easy one :
I am lighter than a feather, yet no man can hold me for very long. What am I?
-
i know i knw
Breath
-
i know i knw
Breath
Yeeeees!! *Claps*
ok here is another :From what number can you take half and leave nothing?
-
i know i knw
Breath
Yeeeees!! *Claps*
ok here is another :From what number can you take half and leave nothing?
uhh 0 :P
-
No :P
8. Take the top half away and the "o" is left :P
-
ahaha nice one
-
do u want more?
-
not really right now
maybe at night :)
-
okay..at night then..isa :D
-
or maybe not :S
-
the owners of the world's largest social websites are teaming up and creating the biggest time wasting website in the world .. the will call it You Twit Face :P
(heard it on the emmy awards :P)
-
emmy or grammy? =P
-
emmy or grammy? =P
mm lol i dunno .. lol Grammy on One TV? :P
-
I was watching grammy yesterday on MBC4 =P
-
I was watching grammy yesterday on MBC4 =P
lmao .. all channels are putting it i guess .. its the one were kayne west grabs the mic from taylor swift? :-\
-
I didnt watch it all =P Maybe.. Cause I changed the channel to watch a movie =P
-
I didnt watch it all =P Maybe.. Cause I changed the channel to watch a movie =P
lol i just switched off the tv :P
-
haha thats better
-
lmao .. all channels are putting it i guess .. its the one were kayne west grabs the mic from taylor swift? :-\
that was the AMAs (american music awards)
-
im hating kayne west for doing that >:(
but then his songs are goood :S lol
-
im hating kayne west for doing that >:(
but then his songs are goood :S lol
rotf
man did u see the look on Swift's face? that was a cracker
but yea west was bein a real !@#$$#@!
but come again, hesa rapper, not really a surprise now is it
-
am in love with kanye west
but, what he did there was really really jerkish .. he was being such an a** ..
felt sorry for taylor too
-
he was only being stupid to show beyonce that he likes her .. and as omer said .. he IS a rapper .. what would u expect? :P
-
he was only being stupid to show beyonce that he likes her .. and as omer said .. he IS a rapper .. what would u expect? :P
i thought so too
-
rotf
man did u see the look on Swift's face? that was a cracker
but yea west was bein a real !@#$$#@!
but come again, hesa rapper, not really a surprise now is it
not a crracker omer =_=
kina shocking :|
i still hate him for tht
-
yes du not insult swift
n HEY!!! :D
-
helllooooooo
-
Hey what happened with Kanye West thing? What did he do?? :o :o :o
-
he interrputed taylor swift when she took some MTV award and said beyonce's video was the best of all time
now zainy can repeat what i said with emotions and tears :P
-
yes omer shat up =_=
hmmph rude guy reall nows hw to ruin such a good moment
-
this thread is still alive?? hahhaha
hw come i didnt see it when i came bq :D lol
-
this thread is still alive?? hahhaha
hw come i didnt see it when i came bq :D lol
because its dead ;P
-
Omg this thread is haunted:|
-
half dead or half alive =P
Ur pick? :D
-
Ill choose 99.999% dead :P
-
I chooose
0.00001 Alive :P :P
-
Oh!!
99.999>0.00001
Meaning it is dead!!!!!!!
aha!! it became dead once it came to this board..Too bad ha?!! :P
Itzzzz okayzz :P
-
yea cuz we dont come in here so frequently :D
-
sad sad sad :(
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
MAAAAKKEE IT ALIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVEEEEEE :P
hwz tht ?? :P :P ::) :D
-
No honestly till the time boom was her on sf this thread was alive cuz he kept postin jokes n riddles
so now NO one posts here=]
-
@Mana: Boom?!! pfffft...No..he used to tell me I have Jokes but I wont post..hahaha...but if he was here sure this whole wouldve been 100% ALIVE!! I am wondering ::)
@Zainy: Its Alive now!!!! Ha Ha Ha! thx Zozo :P :P :P
@Sanity: ah maho el board di kolha mahgoora...ana i didnt agree men el awel..Na2ool eh ba2a (fi song called Na2ool eh) :P
-
then its our job as mods to get it bq to live :P :P
bs ana busy with ma exams.....hahahaha
isA b3d nov exams....lama nerga3 le 2ayam 24/7 online.....msh han5aly 7eta fl forums mahgoora!! :D lol
-
Tell me about it..mashallah 3alik saroo5 in posting...bokra hat3di Zainy :P
ana less habd2 el A-levels half of Nov..ashok aslan eno eli A-level will give me time..bas inshallah I will!
By the way..howa enta nerd? asl ana 3andee el feeling ...if yes..mashallah 3alik.. Masreen da7a7een i know... :P
People this thread will be back to life soon isa...!!! :D
-
Tell me about it..mashallah 3alik saroo5 in posting...bokra hat3di Zainy :P
ana less habd2 el A-levels half of Nov..ashok aslan eno eli A-level will give me time..bas inshallah I will!
By the way..howa enta nerd? asl ana 3andee el feeling ...if yes..mashallah 3alik.. Masreen da7a7een i know... :P
People this thread will be back to life soon isa...!!! :D
ana nerd????
getting gd grades doesnt mean that im a nerd......maybe smart, bs not nerd......3abe 3alaky hahahhaa
-
mm... ur congrating me smth bout the posts ryt miny
herez a joke:
Laugh,,, laugh... luagh
aaaaahhhhh laugh already :P
-
Sanity..aha! so 3abe 3aliki 3ashan i thought ur a nerd? el nerds a7san nas By the way in my opinion..ba3den they have signs..like a nerd will never admit he is a nerd :P :P :P
Zainy? thats a joke?! ahahahahaha...I laughed... :P okay..mmmm...do u have more like these? they are totally funny :P
-
he used to but some memebers used to get offendedn made big deal of it
anyways
yes sanity is right but seriosuly i amms o busy with ib i have french waiting for me but i am like procastinating it :D:D:D
-
Sanity..aha! so 3abe 3aliki 3ashan i thought ur a nerd? el nerds a7san nas By the way in my opinion..ba3den they have signs..like a nerd will never admit he is a nerd :P :P :P
Zainy? thats a joke?! ahahahahaha...I laughed... :P okay..mmmm...do u have more like these? they are totally funny :P
y makin studying to be my life!!........yea i study, bs msh 24 hrs!!! hahahaha
im a normal person......:D
-
made a big deal of jokes?! I never saw that happening in this thread Mana.
LOL Sanity..nerd arent abnormal ppl..ya3ni nerds/geeks are good people :P
Mashi ya3m Sanity...its okay..nerd wala mosh nerd..howa ana mali?
:P :P
-
made a big deal of jokes?! I never saw that happening in this thread Mana.
omg NVM!!!!!!*sighs*
-
I never minded..hahaha LOL Chillax!! :D :P
-
made a big deal of jokes?! I never saw that happening in this thread Mana.
LOL Sanity..nerd arent abnormal ppl..ya3ni nerds/geeks are good people :P
Mashi ya3m Sanity...its okay..nerd wala mosh nerd..howa ana mali?
:P :P
y r u defending them?? :P :P
2oly b2a enik mnhom!! :P :D hahahaha
-
I never minded..hahaha LOL Chillax!! :D :P
yaa thats y i said it...
sighs
-
Sanity..aha! so 3abe 3aliki 3ashan i thought ur a nerd? el nerds a7san nas By the way in my opinion..ba3den they have signs..like a nerd will never admit he is a nerd :P :P :P
Zainy? thats a joke?! ahahahahaha...I laughed... :P okay..mmmm...do u have more like these? they are totally funny :P
man that is so true, man i know nerds who got absoloutely no life other than their books, they insist they aint nerds, and when you ask them what have you done last weekend, its either studying, tutoring, or past papers
-
man that is so true, man i know nerds who got absoloutely no life other than their books, they insist they aint nerds, and when you ask them what have you done last weekend, its either studying, tutoring, or past papers
aha SO SOMEONE AGREES!!
LoL! when I ask them what they did..they tell u ana ma3mltesh 7aga..ana mabazakershi..ana 3amelt crap fel el emta7an..ana has2t..ana AAAA and they start crying !
ba3den ba2a tala2i el Astars in ur face! :P
Sanity...I am not a nerd..beteegi ma3ia 3alatool be 7az...zakia momken...
-
aha SO SOMEONE AGREES!!
LoL! when I ask them what they did..they tell u ana ma3mltesh 7aga..ana mabazakershi..ana 3amelt crap fel el emta7an..ana has2t..ana AAAA and they start crying !
ba3den ba2a tala2i el Astars in ur face! :P
Sanity...I am not a nerd..beteegi ma3ia 3alatool be 7az...zakia momken...
ya5y i remember one of them geepos was disappointed he "only" got 8A*s and an A
-
ya5y i remember one of them geepos was disappointed he "only" got 8A*s and an A
loooll i would die outta happiness if i gt tht :o
-
@Omer : hahahaha Egyptians ba2a..thats why we are simply the best :P :P :P in our country el doctors hatb2a akter men el patients LoL! :P
@Zainy : we are talkin abt Nerds..Egyptian ones...so do u have nerds in ur country? :P
-
Most Pakistanis and Indians are nerds :P
Its the idians, Pakistanis and egytption who are the clever nerds :P
-
I have many pakistani Friends..Indians also..Yea mashallah they got good grades..but they are not very good at Math.. :-\
so Roxy u a nerd? :P
-
I have many pakistani Friends..Indians also..Yea mashallah they got good grades..but they are not very good at Math.. :-\
so Roxy u a nerd? :P
people say I am.. But I dont think I am.. Im studious, but Im not clever ...=l
-
Most Pakistanis and Indians are nerds :P
Its the idians, Pakistanis and egytption who are the clever nerds :P
no offense to the Geepos, but i know a lot of Pakis and Indians who are not THAT studious and nerdy but still end up matching the geepos who tore the books down
(Raskom La Yikbar Antom El Ethnein :P )
ask Sherri for translation :P
-
@Roxy : I heard that ur a nerd from your best friend once when u didnt know that the chemistry paper 1 was AM session and u were nervous.. :P
@Omer : Ah ya3ni enta 2asdak eno e7na 2aghbia? :P yabni i saw Indians and Pakistanis are Good mashallah bas in Math...not very good (el 7a2ee2a ya3ni mabifahmosh 7aga fel math..ana 7asa eni haderbak elnahrda :P) while Geepos b2a Astars flying fel Math..and I had an Indian Math teacher and an Egyptian one...The Indian one when he first tested me said that I was AWESOME in Math and that I am a very smart person..ma3 eno I was sure eza ana gabet 7oomar(donkey) hai3raf ya7el el masa2el di :P
ba3den I know no one can beat Geepo's very few bas..we are still ranked No 1 :P :P
-
@Roxy : I heard that ur a nerd from your best friend once when u didnt know that the chemistry paper 1 was AM session and u were nervous.. :P
@Omer : Ah ya3ni enta 2asdak eno e7na 2aghbia? :P yabni i saw Indians and Pakistanis are Good mashallah bas in Math...not very good (el 7a2ee2a ya3ni mabifahmosh 7aga fel math..ana 7asa eni haderbak elnahrda :P) while Geepos b2a Astars flying fel Math..and I had an Indian Math teacher and an Egyptian one...The Indian one when he first tested me said that I was AWESOME in Math and that I am a very smart person..ma3 eno I was sure eza ana gabet 7oomar(donkey) hai3raf ya7el el masa2el di :P
ba3den I know no one can beat Geepo's very few bas..we are still ranked No 1 :P :P
hey, dont put words in my mouth :P
and math is one subject, am talking bout generally
ya3ny for example when it comes to english/economics/business (subjects that dont need much memorization ya3ny) ana personally, i never got lower than any geepo, english i was the top of my class bas ya3ny most of the top grades were by indians and pakis, economics i had a sudani and a paki in front of me, business, well lets just say half the class fails, i got 55% before i dropped it ;D
we b3dein ento mashalla 3aleikum mo2ati3eeen el durus al 5ususiya :P
we b3dein ya gama3a, i thought this is the jokes thread, not the whos the biggest nerd thread :P
-
yea egyptions pakiz n indians r the nerds ;D
Me nt relly i do study quite a lot but im no genius :P
-
@Roxy : I heard that ur a nerd from your best friend once when u didnt know that the chemistry paper 1 was AM session and u were nervous.. :P
@Omer : Ah ya3ni enta 2asdak eno e7na 2aghbia? :P yabni i saw Indians and Pakistanis are Good mashallah bas in Math...not very good (el 7a2ee2a ya3ni mabifahmosh 7aga fel math..ana 7asa eni haderbak elnahrda :P) while Geepos b2a Astars flying fel Math..and I had an Indian Math teacher and an Egyptian one...The Indian one when he first tested me said that I was AWESOME in Math and that I am a very smart person..ma3 eno I was sure eza ana gabet 7oomar(donkey) hai3raf ya7el el masa2el di :P
ba3den I know no one can beat Geepo's very few bas..we are still ranked No 1 :P :P
loll..! she didd ?
-
@Omer will get back to u later. :P
@Roxy..yea...u were holding the papers in ur hands b4 we were entering the hall with few mins..and then ur friend told me ..that u always study nd all.. :P
-
wallalila shoklo kida leilty soada we mzaffita kaman
-
hahahhaahahaha...! Ah ana keda 3aiza 2aba fadia we lia mazag 3ashan hakteblak sha3ar gameeeeeeeel 3an el Geepos!
haikhlik tateeeeeeeeeer! :P
-
hahahhaahahaha...! Ah ana keda 3aiza 2aba fadia we lia mazag 3ashan hakteblak sha3ar gameeeeeeeel 3an el Geepos!
haikhlik tateeeeeeeeeer! :P
ya5 5ala9, how about i just say " TA7AYA MAST OMMIL DONYA!"
bas please ir7amini we blash lecture tanya 3ankom :P
-
hahahahahaha..I swear I always give lectures at home..this one is nuthin wallah..hahaha ...
Aiwa Keda..howa keda wala balash..Teeeer ba2a 2abl mataiarak :P :P :P :P
-
hahahahahaha..I swear I always give lectures at home..this one is nuthin wallah..hahaha ...
Aiwa Keda..howa keda wala balash..Teeeer ba2a 2abl mataiarak :P :P :P :P
*Runs away so fast my boots slip outa my leg, fly over the air, guess where they land, ryte across Sherri's face*
-
hahahaha...LoooooooL! el mohom enk taaaareeeeeet :P
P.S. ur Boots really missed me :P 8)
-
A wood cutter went to a forest to cut trees with his axe.........
Suddenly all girls in the jungle started loving himmmmmmmmm..................WhY!!!!!
Cus of d axe effect!!!!!!!!!!
-
what is one leged man called as???
anwer this riddle!! :P :P :P
-
what is one leged man called as???
anwer this riddle!! :P :P :P
u do knw i wont answer :P
-
kk
can somebody else answer???
-
Teacher:
How is it possible that you have both got the SAME marks, the SAME mistakes, the SAME answers???
Answer:
We have got the SAME teacher!!!
Hehehe.... lol... Do not use it for cheating :P!
-
hey!!
nobody noes my anser??
very easy!!
pm me if you want to!!
-
what is one leged man called as???
anwer this riddle!! :P :P :P
pegleg?
-
what is one leged man called as???
anwer this riddle!! :P :P :P
A lame?
-
pirate ? :P
or just " a man with one leg" ? :P
-
Hmm, I just saw some funny sh*t on Facebook videos. Haha
-
the answer is very easy!!!!
the man will be alled by his name!!! :P :P :P
lolzzz :D :D :D
-
Loooool good one :D
-
lolzz :D :D
i have got many like these ;) ;)
-
a guy at the end of the road see a truck coming towrds him!!
but does not move away!!
guess why!!?????
-
Heeeeeeeyyyyyy My thread is still alive!! :D :D :D
Okaaaaaaay sheycool...let me guess...uhhhhh...mmmmmmmmmmmmm........
becuz he have super powers that will stop the truck? :P
or umm...the truck will change direction later :-\ :-\
-
naa its easy stuff!!!!
-
a guy at the end of the road see a truck coming towrds him!!
but does not move away!!
guess why!!?????
Because he is at the END of the road!! :D :D :D
If he moves, it will be anyway be HIS END! DEAD END :P
-
haha!!
true!!
he is at the end of the road!!! :D :D
-
Hahahaha.... I won :P :D ;D!!!
-
here i come wid another!!
one day an old man returns from jogging with a police!!
he tells police that he forgot his way back home!!
his wife asks him from past 30 years you have been joggign and how come did you forget your way???
tell the old man's answer!!
-
these are hard riddles :-\
uhhhhhhhhhhhhh....he is old now...
-
here i come wid another!!
one day an old man returns from jogging with a police!!
he tells police that he forgot his way back home!!
his wife asks him from past 30 years you have been joggign and how come did you forget your way???
tell the old man's answer!!
he jogged in different routes
-
"Cause in 30 years, I never came with the police!"..... Something like that?
-
naa....!!!
he says i was too bored to come alone!!! :P :P
looooooolllz!!! :D :D
-
Hahaha, ok!!! :D
I thought he had changed wife... :P :D
-
nna!!
now one more!!
will post it in my next post!!
-
o0 this thread Liveeeeess :D
-
how can a non living thing live or die??? :P :P
-
by killing it when it is alive ???
-
was that a joke!!
dude how can you kill a calculator!!
or desk or somethign like that!!!
-
how can a non living thing live or die??? :P :P
Lemme ask you some :P
How can my house start walking?
What do I do when I am eating?
How can fools be fooled?? ;)
Certainly not by your senseless questions! :D :D :P :P :P
-
he was saying this thread lives so i asked hom how can a thread(rassi) win????
-
Ohhh..... :D
Maybe it's living because of the time each one of us contributes to it out of our lives! :D ;)
-
LOool :P
i meant no1 used to post in this thread for a looong time so it was dying... but now its becoming aliive Thanks to u guyz ;) :D
-
npnp!!!
i make dead htreads live!!! :P :P
-
LOOOOOOOOOOOL!
so u woke up my thread :P
Thank You bro....and thank you Zainy for thanking him..ur talking like this thread is urs...what are best friends for :P
-
thanking other will not want you thank me but when you thank me i reply you wid:
welcomes ;)
-
Hmm...
Competition is STIFF in the EADA group. :P :P :P ;D
-
i dont think so!!
EADA is tha best group and guess the only group formed at drifting away!!
-
Yea, am not thinking...
I am watching that!!! :D
-
oh!!
so you mean this is EADA goign on here??
-
Can you explain me what it is then? :)
-
there were all jokes but then you said EADA and thios stuff began!!
-
Okay, sorry sorry...
That was supposed to be a joke too!
-
ohh so these are jokes!!
people start laughing!!now i am cracking a joke!!1
crack!!!
didnt get it!!
i just cracked it!!!
-
Aaaahhhhhhh YOU :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
By the way, I didn't get yours either... ::) :P :P :P :P :P
-
crack goes he joke!!
By the way wat didnt you get!!
the crack dound rite??
u must turn ur speakers on for that!!
-
No, I didn't get what you were saying...
What language was that???
Hieroglyphics? You need to update it!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P
We live in modern world.
-
ohh!!
you mean the language!!
i ameamn i type too fastso i press wrong buttin somwtimes!!
-
NWayssss
Leaiuve iut leaiuve it!!! :P :P :P :D :D :D
-
oh i togutn no bodey an ever tyoe like i fo!!
sometimes i even dont check wat i tyuope
!!
-
ok im solving ur riddle Shrey, u TRIED to type:
Oh I have forgotten that no body can ever type like i do!!
Sometimes I even do not check what I type
!!
right?!?! :P
-
dude!!
this was not meant for corerectiopns!!!
i mean i type fast and am mostly in hurry !!
so i am not at all in mood to check wat i tyope
!!
so never mind thanx for corecting it!!
you can br a good teacher!!
-
Wheat ayr youi solviung!!!
Heu diead iut deiliubeareeteelyyyyy! :P :P :P
-
lol i knooooww he's doing it on purpose :P
By the way shrey please do not insult me again, ME? a TEACHER?! :o :o :P lol jk
-
Hahaha...
He has not got his degree yet :P :P :P
Why? You need a mental certificate to be teacher? LOL :P
(No offense, it's a LAME joke)
-
dude go ot EADA!!
u must respect teachers!!
and By the way i am not doing it puposleY!!!
i seriously make sillymistakes while typing!!
now seriously talking this took me 3 mintues to type!!
-
Hey, of course I do respect my teachers. You're taking me for what???
purposely*, minutes*.
Maybe you should take 5 minutes then!
By the way, do not be in a hurry for exams............................................... Your results will come hurrying.... With numbers missing.... Seriously.
-
looool then im gonna call u the typo master :P
u either got large fingers or a minature keyboard :P :P
-
i have got both!!!
lolzz
no mistake now!!
-
miniature* :D :P
-
we can make a spellign group!!
like rhyme chime !!
-
spelling***
Sure, do us a favour pls... Do not be the teacher there!! :D :P
-
kk!!
a joke coming up now!!
i mean a riddle!!
wat will be boy having no ears be called???
-
By his name :P :P :P Of course!
-
naa..!!
whatever he will be called he will not come!!!
-
i'll call him Jumbo, then laugh :P :P (lol am i cruel? :P)
-
:D :D :D :D
Okay, nice one!!
Marks awarded............ from nobody....lol
But awarded ;)
-
atleast nobody awarded!!!
i thank him !!
i am really special i guess!
cause nody is too perfect!! :P :P
-
Ahm Ahm...
News: Nobody is nobody!!! :D :D
-
it is said nobody is perfect!!
so if a perfectionist has given me marks then i am perfect than him!! :P :P
-
I haven't said I gave the marks... Nobody did.
By the way, shhhh.... If the perfectionist hears, you'll be given minus marks!
-Z then :P The contrary of A+.
-
kk!!
chil maro!!
why does the gardener cut grass???
-
kk!!
chil maro!!
why does the gardener cut grass???
Because the baker bakes cakes, and cause all mothers keep shouting! :D :D :D :P
-
naa..!!
the ans is very tough!!
cause till date even i could not find it!! :P :P
-
Heyzz Alpha..wasssssup?! :D
and LOOOOOOOOOOOL shrey..ur postign a riddle u dont know its answer! hahaha :P
-
Hellooooo Shoshou.....
I am down, EXAMS ARE UP !! ;) :D :D :D :D
How about you?
Yea... Shrey needs just to forget the riddle as well now!! :P :P
-
hahaha...which exams? A-levels? or IGCSE?
I only took physics this Nov session o-level...and like this i am done with my o-levels...got to do 2 A-level subjects ishallah this year :D
and how come u dont post in chit-chat?! i only see u posting in Humour...come and post there..u will have fun :P
-
Hehehe...No, still O-Levels. :)
I am on the Economics side...
Good Luck for your 2 A Levels then :)!
Work well for them...
Thank You for the invitation, but I have an Add Maths paper tomorrow... Gotta go prepare for that now... Surely, when my exams are over, i will. ;)
See you soon...
Take Care :)
~Salaam...
Hehehe, by the way, the chatroom looks like a cemetry....only visited by ghosts! Maybe most prefer the Chit-Chat corner. Have a Great Time. :)
-
Ohhh...well good luck...the curve is always low...As and A*s will always be there inshallah :P
Yes go study dont waste ur time in Chit-chat now...u will get addicted if u did :D
Thx..will work well inshallah and yes i know..no one visits the chatroom much..we do when we staff have a meeting or sumthin...
Salams..Take care =)
-
Ackkk
i seriously hope the curv is LOooowww
-
pls!!
let this be for jokes only!!
do not change the topic!!
-
If its only for jokes..it will die...
thats why we have talks here.. :P
-
ohh great!!!
here i am wid a great joke!!!
WIFE: 'What would
you do if I died? Would you get married again?
HUSBAND: 'Definitely not!
WIFE: 'Why not? Don't you like being
married?'
HUSBAND: 'Of course I do.
WIFE: 'Then why wouldn't you remarry?
HUSBAND: 'Okay, okay, I'd get married
again.'
WIFE: 'You would?'
HUSBAND: .......?
WIFE: 'Would you live in our house?'
HUSBAND: 'Sure, it's a great
house.'
WIFE: 'Would you sleep with her in our
bed?'
HUSBAND: 'Where else would we sleep?'
WIFE: 'Would you let her drive my
car?'
HUSBAND: 'Probably, it is almost
new.'
WIFE: 'Would you replace my pictures with
hers?'
HUSBAND: 'That would seem like the proper thing to
do.'
WIFE: 'Would you give her my
jewelry?'
HUSBAND: 'No, I'm sure she'd want her
own.'
WIFE: 'Would she wear my shoes'
HUSBAND: 'No, her size is 6.'
WIFE: -- silence -
HUSBAND: '....sh*t.
-
ohh great!!!
here i am wid a great joke!!!
WIFE: 'What would
you do if I died? Would you get married again?
HUSBAND: 'Definitely not!
WIFE: 'Why not? Don't you like being
married?'
HUSBAND: 'Of course I do.
WIFE: 'Then why wouldn't you remarry?
HUSBAND: 'Okay, okay, I'd get married
again.'
WIFE: 'You would?'
HUSBAND: .......?
WIFE: 'Would you live in our house?'
HUSBAND: 'Sure, it's a great
house.'
WIFE: 'Would you sleep with her in our
bed?'
HUSBAND: 'Where else would we sleep?'
WIFE: 'Would you let her drive my
car?'
HUSBAND: 'Probably, it is almost
new.'
WIFE: 'Would you replace my pictures with
hers?'
HUSBAND: 'That would seem like the proper thing to
do.'
WIFE: 'Would you give her my
jewelry?'
HUSBAND: 'No, I'm sure she'd want her
own.'
WIFE: 'Would she wear my shoes'
HUSBAND: 'No, her size is 6.'
WIFE: -- silence -
HUSBAND: '....sh*t.
:D :D :D :D Ah yea!! Nice one here... :D
-
lol...relly cool one shrey
-
got it as mail!! :P
-
looll
Poor wife..
-
looll
Poor wife..
Naaaa.... Rather, poor HUSBAND!!! :D :D :D :D
Were they my Mum and Dad, it's Dad who would have been Poor... It's always so.... :P :P :P
Husbands can start a Charity Funds Collection!!! They are sooo poor... ;) :D :D
-
hahahaha Alphaa...!!
and this joke actually proves how much men are C.H.E.A.T.E.R.S :P
so i was right abt my theory :D :P
-
they are not always CHEATERS!!!
-
They are not "always" CHEATERS...
one day yes...one day no :P
if u cheat once..u are called a "Cheater" ::)
-
so you say girls are not cheaters???
-
of course they are my friend shrey....shoshou cheated on me yesterday!!!hahaha....she let me die in vain!!
-
does some else know abt this :P :P
u know who i mean! :P
-
Adi :o I betrayed u...not cheated :P same meaning i know but still :P
No seriously....I dont cheat at all..or betray my bf :P JK :P
and who is the some else shrey?!!!!!!! :o :P
-
Are u keeping SECRETS from me?! :o :o :o
:P
-
have got none!!
so whyshud i keep!! ;)
-
I hate this emot " ;)"
I know that.... ::)
-
haha...lol...shohou its the same thing!!u betrayed me... :'(
m sad!!!
really sad... :'( :'( :'(
@shrey >:( >:( >:(
-
adi- when were u dying??? ??? ??? ???!!!
shrey-do u want to help and clear the confusion??
-
no need!!
-
chil chil!!
i removed that thread!! :D
-
hmmm...so lastgift's back on sf now....cool...
nd lol...check this out starting from page 2 and follow nd u'll know exactly how i died.... ;)
https://studentforums.biz/index.php/topic,4800.15.html
nd for god sake reply to my pm!!!!!
-
Post with only emots is spam, have to remove it.
Now Hello there Lastgift..how are u? we never spoke reallyy...
Adi..why are u sad? and Shrey whats wrong? u ppl confusing me ??? ???
-
i am sad because u betrayed me.... :-[
shrey is acting weird cuz of lastgift's impact on him :-\
and lastgift's typing replies with only emots cuz she has no words.... ;D
-
chil maro!!
i am not acting wierd!!
i am just trying to cool out things up here!! ;)
-
oh ya mony is right ..this is VERY confusing guys!!
anyways...hey mony!!:)...!!
and that other "sf is the best" thread is sooo RANDOM!! and so typical of EADA!!;D!!..m i too late to be a part of this tragic production???!!?? ;)
-
i already beacme a part!!
i am acting as an editor or you can say some one like critics! ;)
-
Adi and Shrey ??? ok.
Heyz Lastgift, I did not understand anything...from them...so how are ur exams going anyways...u done with Igs>?
Okay Adi, this should not be shocking for u...we dont know each other anyways ...thats wat u get from talking to strangers :P
-
umm...yeah...i just had my LAST igcse yesterday!!!:D :D :D!!
exams overall were cool..they came and went (in jan we will knw who conquered ;)!) !!!it happened every quickly...!!!i hated the schedule though :(!!
u still pending with igs??
p.s -shrey and adi , i am only talking to mony so pls dont post anything irrelevant so that its easier to understand..(although i am sure u guys will !!) :P
-
ino iw wont post ne ting!!
u girls want to talk go to chat room!! :)
-
Ohhhh Congratzzzz Lastgift! did u have ur party?! :P
and yes...time goes sooo quickly...u didnt feel it i know..
I am done last June session....just took physics this session...and grades will be good inshallah for u...every one gets As :D
Shrey...this is reall my thread...u cant sho me away :P
-
yaaah!!i loved the last line mony!!! ;D ;D ;D
Shrey do u realise u r being dominated by the girls here??;)!!!
and party...yeah!!need one desparately!!!!had enough of pastpapapers and igs book on my desk!!!
Very convienently, everyone tells me that A's are easy to achieve....so waiting to see them on my report card!!:)
i am sure phy was good??
-
kk!!
you girls may enjoy for now!!
do wat you want to!!
chun chun ke dekh lunga!! :P
-
Shrey's post reminds me ...Mony,are u from India???
-
No I am not indian..although i like Indians so much..have great friends from there..from everywhere i have great friends :D
Me is Egyptian...living in KSA...
-
ohh..!!
nd all these days i thought of you being pakistani!! :P
-
ohh..!!
nd all these days i thought of you being pakistani!! :P
:o hahahahahaha....No I am not...i know some urdu though...cuz of my paki friends.. :D
I am an arab...i speak in arabic in the forum..u should see me posting in arabic..
-
i am keen to learn that lang!!
i heard many great things abt it :)
-
yeha :D
-
i am HORRIBLE with languages!!:'(!!
still want to multilingual!! ::)
-
i am HORRIBLE with languages!!:'(!!
still want to multilingual!! ::)
yeah i suck at learning languages :(
-
i suck at rnglish and french!!
dont know ab rest!!
i think i will like to learn geramn or arbic
-
Cool u guys wanna learn Arabic ....!!!! :D
I speak English, French and Arabic.
Know few words..urdu, spanish and Italien... :D
I got at A* in English alhamdolilah :D
and Shrey..learn Arabiccccccc....half of the world speaks arabic...so learn it.. :D
-
i know!!
it is the largest lang after eng
i guess
-
No French is the second...I guess :-\
EDIT> I just googled...i was wrong...check the top 10
1. Mandarin - Number of speakers: 1 billion+
2. English - Number of speakers: 508 million
3. Hindi - Number of speakers: 497 million
4. Spanish - Number of speakers: 392 million
5. Russian - Number of speakers: 277 million
6. Arabic - Number of speakers: 246 million
7. Bengali - Number of speakers: 211 million
8. Portuguese - Number of speakers: 191 million
9. Malay ? Indonesian Number of speakers: 159 million
10. French - Number of speakers: 129 million
Arabic is No. 6...French is the last :D
-
hey edit ur post
it is not hindustani it must be hindi
-
I got it like this from the website ::)
-
no prblem..
but next time remember it is hindi
hindustani are the people living in hindustan(India)
-
Its okay will edit it....like it matters? :P
-
i guess i does not matter much but after all it is my country's national lang.
-
I changed it :D
-
Patriotism!!! :)
-
no this is called pride for country :P
-
Patriotism!!! :)
What does that mean?! ???
-
i think the same thing in different words :P
-
Yeah..the same thing :)...love for country!!
-
love and pride has got difference.. ::)
-
Ohhhoo can we stop scrunitizing each others eng?? :p!!
-
kk!!
i am not as good in english thogh!!
-
Ohhhoo can we stop scrunitizing each others eng?? :p!!
HAHAHAHA u guyz r craaaaaaazzzzzzzyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ::) :D
-
I have a very gooooood joke...so funny..but I am so lazy to post..
so anyone share? Zainy? :P
-
Me Dnt ask me.. lol ..
all ill do is copy.. Paste.. lol
-
We all do that Zainy :P
-
yea but i dnt go deepp down searching for i like yall do
i take the first one
-
CONGRATZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ FOR UR 11000 POST!!!!!!!!! :D
Go Zainy GO Zainy :D
:P
-
hahahaha thnk u miny <3
-
You welcome my lovely sister :P
<33333
-
lool <3
-
so nobody of you are wanting to post a joke i think i'll do it in my next one..
searhing for it :P
-
Search Search :P
-
so ppl hv still been searching......i ll post as soon as i find 1......but dnt no wen i ll bother 2 find 1 atm :D
-
i guess no one is that humorous which has mafe them not to post ne thing here exspecially jokes
-
yeah i guess.....r v rite zainy? is der no 1 dat humorous dat can post jokes? :P
-
this topic can only be made lively is many members are online at the same time
-
this topic can only be made lively is many members are online at the same time
Are there as many jokes as there are people online...? :) ;)
-
Are there as many jokes as there are people online...? :) ;)
yea pretty much :D
-
Are there as many jokes as there are people online...? :) ;)
waaaaaay past your bed time missy!
-
Alright... As many people to keep it alive.....
Hey Mani :)! Hehehe, can I use the same line for you? :P :P :P
Yup... Not feeling sleepy... But you're 1 hour in advance... Had a nightmare, LOL?
-
Alright... As many people to keep it alive.....
Hey Mani :)! Hehehe, can I use the same line for you? :P :P :P
Yup... Not feeling sleepy... But you're 1 hour in advance... Had a nightmare, LOL?
I was awake cuz i have an exam in a few hours (PRAY FOR ME <3!)
I am gonna nap for an hour, fajr, then study a lil, exam. :P
yesh its 334am
-
I was awake cuz i have an exam in a few hours (PRAY FOR ME <3!)
I am gonna nap for an hour, fajr, then study a lil, exam. :P
yesh its 334am
Ohh.... Too much tension, huh? Can't carry them to bed? :D :D :D
Okay, sure... My Prayers and Best Wishes will always be there. :)
Here 04 38... Wasn't feeling sleepy.... Maybe cause I had napped during the day... ::)
I'm just browsing pages...LOL... Having a look at your debates... ;)
-
Ohh.... Too much tension, huh? Can't carry them to bed? :D :D :D
Okay, sure... My Prayers and Best Wishes will always be there. :)
Here 04 38... Wasn't feeling sleepy.... Maybe cause I had napped during the day... ::)
I'm just browsing pages...LOL... Having a look at your debates... ;)
yessum
thx
lol
yeah pray fajr before sleeping :P :D :P
take care
-
Ohh.... Too much tension, huh? Can't carry them to bed? :D :D :D
Okay, sure... My Prayers and Best Wishes will always be there. :)
Here 04 38... Wasn't feeling sleepy.... Maybe cause I had napped during the day... ::)
I'm just browsing pages...LOL... Having a look at your debates... ;)
vell vell vell, am i the only one who finds it normal to sleep at 5?
-
vell vell vell, am i the only one who finds it normal to sleep at 5?
Sleep at 5? I woke up at 5! ;D ;D ;D
Am I abnormal..... to wake up at 5? ;)
-
YEss u r; but depends whether its AM or PM
-
AM...
The time format is 04 38... ;)
PM, it would be 16 38...
By the way, who is what? Normal or abnormal? LOL :D
-
I wake up at 5 everyday; even if I sleep at 4:30. (fajr :D)
-
I wake up at 5 everyday; even if I sleep at 4:30. (fajr :D)
Very courageous... You can wake up 30 minutes after...while some just keep sticking to bed!! :D
-
It is soooo nice n good to wake up so early in the morning.. :D
I love this feeling..but when i dont have school :P
-
It is soooo nice n good to wake up so early in the morning.. :D
I love this feeling..but when i dont have school :P
lol....even me...but naturally i tend to sleep on till d aftrnoon... ;D ;D
-
lol....even me...but naturally i tend to sleep on till d aftrnoon... ;D ;D
same here, but then again, i DO sleep at 5 am ;D
-
same here, but then again, i DO sleep at 5 am ;D
lol...i sleep at 3 or 4 AM...haha
-
Ever since I joined sf I have been staying up every night until 3 AM.
This last week has a been a tiring one, but sooo fun! :)
-
Ever since I joined sf I have been staying up every night until 3 AM.
This last week has a been a tiring one, but sooo fun! :)
:D
Ahahaaaa!
THE ADDICTION!
-
hahaha wow :P :D gd gd ;)
-
And this morning I slept through the alarm system and skipped the whole day of school.
I have to start getting some sleep ;D
-
And this morning I slept through the alarm system and skipped the whole day of school.
I have to start getting some sleep ;D
You have school when Thanksgiving is tomorrow? :/
-
You have school when Thanksgiving is tomorrow? :/
I don't have school tomorrow.
Not because its thanksgiving which is sad. Fins are not known for socialising much.
-
After numerous rounds of "We don't even know if Saddam is still alive",
>Saddam decided to send George W. a letter in his own writing to let his
>friend know that he is still in the game.
>Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a coded message:
>370HSSV-0773H
>George W. couldn't figure it out so he typed it in and emailed Colin
>Powell. Colin and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the CIA.
>No one at the CIA could solve it so it went to the NSA and then to MIT and NASA and the cc list got longer and longer.
>Eventually it arrived at the Feds.
>Dr. Greenspan looked at it and replied the next second: "Perhaps the President would wish to look at the message up-side down"
LOL :P
this was posted in a gulf war "war blog" in April 2003 .. i bet Saddam laughed at this before he was hung :P
-
After numerous rounds of "We don't even know if Saddam is still alive",
>Saddam decided to send George W. a letter in his own writing to let his
>friend know that he is still in the game.
>Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a coded message:
>370HSSV-0773H
>George W. couldn't figure it out so he typed it in and emailed Colin
>Powell. Colin and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the CIA.
>No one at the CIA could solve it so it went to the NSA and then to MIT and NASA and the cc list got longer and longer.
>Eventually it arrived at the Feds.
>Dr. Greenspan looked at it and replied the next second: "Perhaps the President would wish to look at the message up-side down"
LOL :P
this was posted in a gulf war "war blog" in April 2003 .. i bet Saddam laughed at this before he was hung :P
Omgosh hahahaa! xD xD that made my day! :D
-
And this morning I slept through the alarm system and skipped the whole day of school.
I have to start getting some sleep ;D
take bio classes, they're the best places to sleep at (excluding arabic, but i am sure yall dont have arabic classes over at Scandinavia)
-
take bio classes, they're the best places to sleep at (excluding arabic, but i am sure yall dont have arabic classes over at Scandinavia)
Our bio teacher is the strictest teacher out there. You wouldn't want to sleep in her bio classes :P
Besides, bio is interesting :)
Our physics teacher doesn't care much... but i don't have them now (dam!) :D
-
After numerous rounds of "We don't even know if Saddam is still alive",
>Saddam decided to send George W. a letter in his own writing to let his
>friend know that he is still in the game.
>Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a coded message:
>370HSSV-0773H
>George W. couldn't figure it out so he typed it in and emailed Colin
>Powell. Colin and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the CIA.
>No one at the CIA could solve it so it went to the NSA and then to MIT and NASA and the cc list got longer and longer.
>Eventually it arrived at the Feds.
>Dr. Greenspan looked at it and replied the next second: "Perhaps the President would wish to look at the message up-side down"
LOL :P
this was posted in a gulf war "war blog" in April 2003 .. i bet Saddam laughed at this before he was hung :P
lol i had 2 turn the whole laptop upside down....its hilarious :D
-
Biology class:
A professor stood before his class of twenty senior organic biology students, about to hand out the final exam.
"I want to say that it's been a pleasure teaching you this semester. I know you've all worked extremely hard and many of you are off to medical school after summer. So that no one gets their GPA messed up because they might have been celebrating a bit too much this week, anyone who would like to opt out of the final exam today will receive a 'B' for the course."
There was much rejoicing in the class as students got up, walked to the front of the class, and took the professor up on his offer. As the last taker left the room, the professor looked out over the handful of remaining students and asked, "Anyone else? This is your last chance." One final student rose up and opted out of the final.
The professor closed the door and took attendance of those students remaining. "I'm glad to see you believe in yourself," he said. "You all get 'A's."
Physics class:
A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him.
"Why do we have to learn this stuff?" one young man blurted out.
"To save lives," the professor responded before continuing the lecture.
A few minutes later the student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?"
The professor stared at the student for a long time without saying a word. Finally the professor continued. "Physics saves lives," he said, "because it keeps the idiots out of medical school."
How do these ones sound??? ;D
-
Bolnde Jokes:
How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
A: Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper
Blonde Inventions
1. The water-proof towel
2. Solar powered flashlight
3. Submarine screen door
4. A book on how to read
5. Inflatable dart board
6. A dictionary index
7. Ejector seat in a helicopter
8. Powdered water
9. Pedal-powered wheel chair
10. Water-proof tea bag
lol!!!
No offence meant 2 our bonde friend, dou.
-
looooooool liked the physics one the most. :D
Thx for posting. Post more if u have. :P
-
nice ones amelia
a dictionary index, hmmm, not a bad idea if different letters were colored so we dont have to scranble thru everytime :D
-
So who likes blondes over here? :P
For me, I don't like blonde guys much. Prefer burrente :-\
-
So who likes blondes over here? :P
For me, I don't like blonde guys much. Prefer burrente :-\
i like both.. but depends on the guy too.. . ;)
-
Personally, i think blonde guys r gayish. But is dere ny1 on da forum hu is blonde?
-
Personally, i think blonde guys r gayish. But is dere ny1 on da forum hu is blonde?
LOL, members in the forum are mostly from the Middle East. So I don't think so :-\
-
oh, thankgod! where r u 4om, Mony?
-
A frog's Dream girl
A small frog goes to a fortune teller and asks if he is going meet a young girl.
The psychic says, "Yes, you are."
The frog replies, "Where? In a bar or at a party?"
The psychic says, "In biology class."
-
hahahahahahahaha.......!!!!!!! That joke made me laugh..!!!!! LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL! Pooor frog :D
I am Egyptian Amelia. What about you..?
-
So who likes blondes over here? :P
For me, I don't like blonde guys much. Prefer burrente :-\
ye5rib beitik, guys are never "brunettes" thats a feminine terminology! dammit! its called Brunet without the extra t and e
-
ye5rib beitik, guys are never "brunettes" thats a feminine terminology! dammit! its called Brunet without the extra t and e
Why have you gone into correction mode all of a sudden.. lol
We undrstood what she meant.. :)
-
hahahahahaha..!!!! Thx for the correction ya Omer..loooooool..CIE should take that A* they gave me in English :-[ :-[
Thank You Lana. :D Is that ur real name By the way..?
-
m a bengali, Mony.
-
.. nd guys, did u know dat Men are actually struk dumb when dey c a blonde, its a fact i read somewhere but cant remeber now...
Anyways, here's another fact.
while she is attractive and popular, she lacks both common street-sense and academic intelligence, often to a comedic level. Blondes are usually portrayed as promiscuous and selfish. They also tend to carry around tiny purses that don't actually carry anything, and also little dogs who are completely stoned..
i guess, i sld. stop this thing abt. blondes. its not like i've a grudge against them...
-
and here's my joke 4 da day,
Getting Revenge by marriage
[/color].
Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he sad to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones."
Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone after you."
Johnson: "But I want you to."
Wife: "But why?"
Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!"
-
LOL :D
i miss this thread
and i just found it
didnt think it would keep going :D
glad it did tho
-
yes they should Monny :P
-
Yeah KAM. Nice memories in this thread. :D
@Omer ::) enta shareer ::)
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The dumbest blond today is parsi Hilton - actually she is not so dumb. Half the world despises her and the other half love her but everyone talks about her. It takes intelligence to get to that position.,
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I don't like her AT ALL. She is so spoiled..?!
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She is less than useless frankless. She is half the reason areica is half bankrupt
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Yeah KAM. Nice memories in this thread. :D
@Omer ::) enta shareer ::)
MWA HAHAHA
lol@astar: and the other half is...?
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hmm, one thing or da oder keeps u guys going, well, here's my joke of da day.
One day Bill complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts, I guess I should see a doctor."
His friend offered, "Don't do that. There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker an cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10."
Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks.
Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction.
He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:
Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better.
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hahahaha...good one. :D
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There was a cargo shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa.
It suddenly had a malfunction, and crashed in the jungle.
A few days later, Pepsi sent a rescue plane to search for the plane and crew.
They found the wreckage, but were not able to locate the crew.
They searched the area and met with a tribe of cannibals.
They walked up to the Chief of the tribe and asked him if he knew anything about the crash.
The Chief nods and simply says, "Yes...seen plane crash".
When asked where the crew was, the Cheif replyed, "We ate the crew, and we drank the Pepsi!"
The Rescue crew was shocked. Another man asked, "Did you eat their legs?"
The chief replied, "We ate their legs, and we drank the Pepsi!"
Another rescuer asked, "Did you eat their arms?"
The Chief said, "We ate their arms, and we drank the Peps!"
Finally, another rescuer had to ask, "Did you..you know...eat their...things?"
The cheif says, "NO, you idoit!"... even cannibals know that...
"THINGS go better with Coke!"
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There was a cargo shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa.
It suddenly had a malfunction, and crashed in the jungle.
A few days later, Pepsi sent a rescue plane to search for the plane and crew.
They found the wreckage, but were not able to locate the crew.
They searched the area and met with a tribe of cannibals.
They walked up to the Chief of the tribe and asked him if he knew anything about the crash.
The Chief nods and simply says, "Yes...seen plane crash".
When asked where the crew was, the Cheif replyed, "We ate the crew, and we drank the Pepsi!"
The Rescue crew was shocked. Another man asked, "Did you eat their legs?"
The chief replied, "We ate their legs, and we drank the Pepsi!"
Another rescuer asked, "Did you eat their arms?"
The Chief said, "We ate their arms, and we drank the Peps!"
Finally, another rescuer had to ask, "Did you..you know...eat their...things?"
The cheif says, "NO, you idoit!"... even cannibals know that...
"THINGS go better with Coke!"
Nice one. :D
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hehe lol nice one :P
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lol :D
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oryt guys .. instead of posting your jokes in separate threads .. post them here .. let's revive this thread! :D
I'll start :P
As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."
She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".
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lol!!!! ;D nice one Q80BOY...... ;D
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here's another one for my good friend lord kratos! :P hahaha
There was a blonde and a brunette in an elevator. On their way down, they stop to pick up another person also on their way down. When the person got on, the girls noticed that he was pretty cute. Unfortunately he had dandruff. Finally, on the way off of the elevator the two girls let the guy go ahead of them. The brunette turns to the blonde and says "Oh my god! We need to give him Head and Shoulders." The blonde then replies "That's a pretty good idea, but how are we going to give him shoulders?"
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i got a riddle :)
k
A friend told Trevor that someone has stashesd a $50 note in a book in the local library. The friend doesn't know the title of the book but goes on to tell Trevor that the money is hidden between pages 201 and 202 of the unnamed book.With this information, does Trevor ransack the library looking for the right book and the money, or does he laugh off the whole matter? Why?
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laugh it off cause his dad is a rich businessman? :P
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lolll no
but close :P
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mara sa3eedi died.....5 angles came to him.....two to ask him the questions and three to convince him he died :P
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mara sa3eedi died.....5 angles came to him.....two to ask him the questions and three to convince him he died :P
haha haha lol good one
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A Guy was sitting in a sky bar ( a bar at the last floor in a sky scraper) so he's drinking his cup and another guy comes and sits beside him
the guy that was here previously tells the new guy "go jump out of the window and you'll see how you'll just shoot back in"
he goes like haha shutup its impossible
so the guy tells him look ill prove it for you, look, so he jumps and he suddenly shoots back in :o
so the guy tells him do it agaain!! he does it and he shoots back in again!!!
so new guy gets convinced and runnsss and jumppsss, and doesnt come back but falls and dies, so that man sits back and finishes his cup, the bartender says "superman your an a*shol** when your drunk :P"
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TEACHER-STUDENT JOKES :P
Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Student: The future tense is "u will go to jail".
Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.
Teacher:"This is the fifth time this week that i have had punish you What do you have to say?
Student: "Thank god Saterday and Sunday are holidays, Sir!"
TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
STUDENT : "HIJKLMNO! "!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
STUDENT : Yesterday you said it's H to O !
TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of "COINCIDENCE?"
STUDENT : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots !
STUDENT: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.
TEACHER : Now, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ?
STUDENT: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
TEACHER : JOE, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his ?
JOE: No, teacher, it's the same dog !
TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
STUDENT: A teacher
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haha lol
hilarious
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Two muffins were sitting in the oven
One turns to the other and says, “Wow it’s hot in here!”
The other muffins says, “Woah! A talking muffin!!!”
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some stupid question
If a person with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, would it be considered as a hostage situation?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
Where do forest rangers go to “get away from it all?”
Is there another word for synonym?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone would clean them?
How is it possible to have a “civil war?”
If one syncronized swimmer drowns, do the other swimmers drown too?
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Joke #1:
There was this one boy who was on someone’s doorstep on his tiptoes trying to reach the doorbell. A man sees the boy struggling and goes up to the boy.
“Would you like me to ring the doorbell for you?” asked the man
“Yes please,” the boy replied.
The man reached up and rang the doorbell and smiled at the boy. “Now what?” he asked.
“I don’t know about you sir,” said the boy, “but I’m gonna run like heck!”
Joke #2:
So there was this third grade teacher who was trying to get her students enthusiastic about the picture day.
“Remember to bring $5 and wear a nice outfit. In future years, you’ll love looking at these pictures. You’ll be able to say, “Hey! That’s Jessica! She became a nurse!” or That’s Robbie! He became a movie star!”
A student from the back of the class pitched in.
“And that’s the teacher! She’s dead!”
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nicee :)
k id better post some jokes :)
right so a horse walk sinto the bar
and the guy next to him says " why the long face?"
:)
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Q: What did the chicken say when she saw scrambled eggs?
A: What a crazy, mixed up kid.
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ok heres a riddle see if any of you can solve it
A PLANE CRASH AT THE BORDER OF TWO COUNTRIES.WHERE WOULD THE SURVIVORS BE BURIED?
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nowhere
they're survivors :D
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nowhere
they're survivors :D
haha lol yup
this works better wen u ask it
try it u can really fool ppl
i remember i asked my family and they all said on the borders haha
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lol..yea i hv tried it :D
not this one but a similar one and i got a similar answer too :P
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hahahahahahahahahaha.... ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D
very nice jokes... ;D
keep it comin' guys... ;)
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hahahahahahahahahaha.... ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D
very nice jokes... ;D
keep it comin' guys... ;)
haha lol
i wud if i knew anymore
but i have run out for the time being
lol give me some time to recharge
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Best yo mama joke!!!! ;D
yo mama's so ugly that when she was born, the doctor looked at her A** and her and said that they were twins!!!! :P
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Q: What invention made it possible for humans to walk through walls?
A: The door
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Hey!
Mind if I make a joke? (Im going to type one anyways! ;D)
A British minister on a visit to Morscow who, in order to please his host, mugged up a short speech in Russian. On his way to the banquet he realised he did not kow the Russian for 'ladies and gentlemen.' He stopped his car near a public toilet and took down the equivalent. His speech did not get the kind of response he expected. Afterwards he asked one of his colleagues what had gone wrong.
The colleague replied, ''Your speech was excellent, but why did you have to start with 'Male and Female urinals' ?''
:D
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Q: What goes peck, peck, peck, boom?
A: A chicken in a minefield.
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Q: What invention made it possible for humans to walk through walls?
A: The door
REALLYYY !!!!! :o :o :o :o HAHAHAHAHA ;D ;D ;D
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mara sa3eedi died.....5 angles came to him.....two to ask him the questions and three to convince him he died :P
cool 8)
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TEACHER-STUDENT JOKES :P
TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
STUDENT : "HIJKLMNO! "!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
STUDENT : Yesterday you said it's H to O !
looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool :P
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Hey!
Mind if I make a joke? (Im going to type one anyways! ;D)
A British minister on a visit to Morscow who, in order to please his host, mugged up a short speech in Russian. On his way to the banquet he realised he did not kow the Russian for 'ladies and gentlemen.' He stopped his car near a public toilet and took down the equivalent. His speech did not get the kind of response he expected. Afterwards he asked one of his colleagues what had gone wrong.
The colleague replied, ''Your speech was excellent, but why did you have to start with 'Male and Female urinals' ?''
:D
i like it 8)
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Q: What invention made it possible for humans to walk through walls?
A: The door
7elwa di ..loool :D
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The 10 greatest sarcastic dares!!!!
Sarcastically speaking, I dare you to do some of the things found on my top ten list.
10. Pull into a gas station and use the window washer to wash your entire car.
Joe Humor9. Ask a bank teller to break a $100 bill for you. Then when asked how you want it done say, "in hundreds".
8. Call a political candidate's campaign office and ask them for a donation to your non-candidacAy.
7. Ask a security guard how it feels knowing that in all the action movies the security guards are always the first to die.
6. When you get credit card offers in the mail, stuff the prepaid envelopes with toilet paper and mail them back. (whether you use new or used toilet paper is totally up to you.)
5. Call your bank and ask them to add your checking account onto the $700 billion government bail out plan.
4. Find someone who is big into worrying about the threat of global warming, remind them of their own carbon dioxide and body heat contribution to the planet, and ask them to stop it.
3. Ask a judge if you can get away with murder as long as you can convince a jury of your peers ahead of time that it is justified.
2. Send a bill to every TV station, radio station, cell phone company, and satellite company, charging them an "access fee" for the waves they broadcast through your property. If they refuse payment, charge them with trespassing.
And the #1 Sarcastic Dare...
1. Circulate a petition to put "intelligent human beings" on the endangered species list.
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The 10 greatest sarcastic dares!!!!
Sarcastically speaking, I dare you to do some of the things found on my top ten list.
10. Pull into a gas station and use the window washer to wash your entire car.
Joe Humor9. Ask a bank teller to break a $100 bill for you. Then when asked how you want it done say, "in hundreds".
8. Call a political candidate's campaign office and ask them for a donation to your non-candidacAy.
7. Ask a security guard how it feels knowing that in all the action movies the security guards are always the first to die.
6. When you get credit card offers in the mail, stuff the prepaid envelopes with toilet paper and mail them back. (whether you use new or used toilet paper is totally up to you.)
5. Call your bank and ask them to add your checking account onto the $700 billion government bail out plan.
4. Find someone who is big into worrying about the threat of global warming, remind them of their own carbon dioxide and body heat contribution to the planet, and ask them to stop it.
3. Ask a judge if you can get away with murder as long as you can convince a jury of your peers ahead of time that it is justified.
2. Send a bill to every TV station, radio station, cell phone company, and satellite company, charging them an "access fee" for the waves they broadcast through your property. If they refuse payment, charge them with trespassing.
And the #1 Sarcastic Dare...
1. Circulate a petition to put "intelligent human beings" on the endangered species list.
good ones...!!! :D
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LOVED THE DARES
would be great if i did them in thhe summer :)
mwahahahaha ahem
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thanks DrEvil and ksitna ;D
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LOL :P
Nice ones for a change ::) :P
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LOL :P
Nice ones for a change ::) :P
all cause of u >:(
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WHAT NOT TO DO WHEN FORGETTING YOUR ANNIVERSARY!!!! :P
John was in trouble, really big trouble. You see, he forgot his wedding anniversary and, if you're married, you can imagine what he's probably going through. His wife was really pissed.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!" She was serious too, so John got serious.
The next morning he woke up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped, right there in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife threw her robe on and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house and opened in with much anticipation.
Inside she found a brand new bathroom scale. John has been missing since Thursday.
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all cause of u >:(
I don't think so ::)
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#1) A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
#2) One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
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lol awesome haris94 nice jokes
haha cant stop laughing
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hahaha....nice ones haris :D
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thanx.... ;D
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I know some will hate me for this, and some won't even get it... but i need to say it ;D
So A guy brought a scale for his girlfriend as a present. When she asked him why, he said: I thought girls liked this kind of stuff. Angry, she brought him a ruler and said I thought boys like that kind of stuff...
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I know some will hate me for this, and some won't even get it... but i need to say it ;D
So A guy brought a scale for his girlfriend as a present. When she asked him why, he said: I thought girls liked this kind of stuff. Angry, she brought him a ruler and said I thought boys like that kind of stuff...
ha haaaa frickin perverted joke!!!!!
nice one baladya!!! :P
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ha haaaa frickin perverted joke!!!!!
nice one baladya!!! :P
I hope nid and mony doent get it ^^ But funny sh*t man xD ;D
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YO MAMA JOKEESSS !!!! :D ;D
Yo mama is so old that she farts dust :D >:D
Yo mama is so fat when she passed by my tv, i missed 4 seasons of prison break
Yo mama is so stupid she died from hunger when she got locked in a supermarket
Yo mama is so stupid she pied in her pants when got locked in a bathroom
Those are my fav ;D :D ;D :D ;D
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YO MAMA JOKEESSS !!!! :D ;D
Yo mama is so old that she farts dust :D >:D
Yo mama is so fat when she passed by my tv, i missed 4 seasons of prison break
Yo mama is so stupid she died from hunger when she got locked in a supermarket
Yo mama is so stupid she pied in her pants when got locked in a bathroom
Those are my fav ;D :D ;D :D ;D
ha haa haa, ;D awesome baladya.........!! ;)
keep posting!!!!! :D
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K this might work only if u say white 10 times loudly, a bit fast:
Say white 10 times bla bla.... Finished? Okay, what does a cow drink?
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I didn't get it :-[
Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake were walking along the beach. Suddenly, Justin says, "Aww, Britney, look at the dead birdie."
Britney looks up at the sky and says, "Where?!"
LOL :P
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I got this one ;D :P
An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store
one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his
side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a
special ring for his girlfriend.
The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a
$5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, "I
don't think you understand, I want something very special."
At that statement, the jeweler went to his special
stock and brought another ring over.
"Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000," the jeweler
said. The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole
body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this
said, "We'll take it."
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old
man stated, by check. " I know you need to make sure
my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call
the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the
ring up Monday afternoon," he said.
Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old
man. "There's no money in that account."
"I know", said the old man, "but can you imagine the
weekend I had?"
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This one for all INDIANS!
Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman for Microsoft Europe. 5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is Arun an Indian (Mumbai) guy.
Bill Gates thanked all the candidates for coming and asking those who do not know JAVA program to leave. 2000 people leave the room. Arun says to himself, 'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to lose if I stay. I'll give it a try'
Bill Gates asked the candidates who never had experience of managing more than 100 people to leave.
2000 people leave the room. Arun says to himself ' I never managed anybody by myself but I have nothing to lose if I stay. What can happen to me?' So he stays.
Then Bill Gates asked candidates who do not have management diplomas to leave. 500 people leave the room. Arun says to himself, 'I left school at 15 but what have I got to lose?' So he stays in the room.
Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat to leave. 498 people leave the room. Arun says to himself, 'I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat but what do I have to lose?' So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate.
Everyone else has gone.
Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only two candidates who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a conversation together in that language.'
Calmly, Arun turns to the other candidate and says 'Kaisa hai re tu'
The other candidate answers 'Accha hu re!'
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@Baladya .. didnt get it either .. i think the joke is it .. like fools we try sayin white .. mom was staring at me .. :-[ :P
@nid hahha ..LOL .. good one evn the Britney one
@Nobody .. LMAO !!!! awesome .. hahahhaha ..
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YO MAMA JOKEESSS !!!! :D ;D
Yo mama is so old that she farts dust :D >:D
Yo mama is so fat when she passed by my tv, i missed 4 seasons of prison break
Yo mama is so stupid she died from hunger when she got locked in a supermarket
Yo mama is so stupid she pied in her pants when got locked in a bathroom
Those are my fav ;D :D ;D :D ;D
LOL
Yo mama is so fat you can run a whole marathon around her
Yo mama is so fat she’s got her own zip code
Yo mama is so fat I ran around her twice and got lost.
my favs =P
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LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL THEYR BOTH INDIANS ......HAHAHHAHAAH :p
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I got this one ;D :P
An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store
one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his
side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a
special ring for his girlfriend.
The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a
$5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, "I
don't think you understand, I want something very special."
At that statement, the jeweler went to his special
stock and brought another ring over.
"Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000," the jeweler
said. The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole
body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this
said, "We'll take it."
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old
man stated, by check. " I know you need to make sure
my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call
the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the
ring up Monday afternoon," he said.
Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old
man. "There's no money in that account."
"I know", said the old man, "but can you imagine the
weekend I had?"
@ nid -I was going to post this one..... :(
@baladya nice one -I got that ........ ;)
when we say white white for10 times, we r inclined towards saying cows drink milk!!!! :P but they drink water!!! ;)
@ nobody- nice joke....... :P
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LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL THEYR BOTH INDIANS ......HAHAHHAHAAH :p
You know hindi..? nice..where are you from?
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DEFINITELY!!!! ;)
A nursery school teacher says to her class, "Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?"
First a little girl says, "The sky is definitely blue."
The teacher says, "Sorry, Amy, but the sky can sometimes be gray, or black."
A second little boy says, "Trees are definitely green."
"Sorry, but in the autumn, the trees are brown."
Then little Johnny from the back of the class stands up and asks, "Does a fart have lumps?"
The teacher looks horrified and says, "Johnny! Of course not!!!"
"OK...then I DEFINITELY sh*t my pants!" :P
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DEFINITELY!!!! ;)
A nursery school teacher says to her class, "Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?"
First a little girl says, "The sky is definitely blue."
The teacher says, "Sorry, Amy, but the sky can sometimes be gray, or black."
A second little boy says, "Trees are definitely green."
"Sorry, but in the autumn, the trees are brown."
Then little Johnny from the back of the class stands up and asks, "Does a fart have lumps?"
The teacher looks horrified and says, "Johnny! Of course not!!!"
"OK...then I DEFINITELY sh*t my pants!" :P
hahahahahahaha...!!!! LOL! Good one. :P
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CORNIEST PICK UP LINES !!!!!!!!!! ::) ;)
Alright ladies, I admit... men have said some pretty corny things to break the ice. Pick-up lines have become somewhat of a novelty, only the coolest guys use them now (kidding). At any rate, here are the top 5 corniest pickup lines I've ever heard !!! :P
You must be the reason for global warming because you're hot!!
Is your name Gillette? Cause baby you’re the best a man can get!
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk past you again?!
You might as well sleep with me because I'm gonna tell everyone we did anyway!
I’ve heard sex is a killer. Wanna die happy?!! ::) ;) :P
TO BE CONTINUED!!!! ;)
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Hahahahaha! Nice ones :D :P
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loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool LOOOOOOORD HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA HAHAHAHAHA
HAHAAHAH LOL!!!!!
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two awesome jokes!!!!!
Who was the first sick-o to look at a cow and say “hmmm, I think i´l squeeze those dangly things and drink whatever comes out”?
That is an interesting qustion, but what really makes me wonder is – what if it had been a bull? ::) :P
another one!!!
disclaimer!!!! read at ur own cost...... I shall not be responsible for the damage caused!!!! :P
once a women goes to a church to confess to a father.
women: father, father i just called a men yesterday a son of a b*tch.
father: there is no need to confess for that.
women : but father he touched my hands.
father : like this . (father touches her hand) there is no need to confess for that
women: but father he stripped my clothes.
father : like this . (father stripps her clothes) there is no need to confess for that.
women: but father he put his u know what in my u know where.
father : like this . (father makes out with her) there is no need to confess for that.
women : but father he had aids.
father : that son of a b*tch”"”"”"”"”‘
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two awesome jokes!!!!!
Who was the first sick-o to look at a cow and say “hmmm, I think i´l squeeze those dangly things and drink whatever comes out”?
That is an interesting qustion, but what really makes me wonder is – what if it had been a bull? ::) :P
another one!!!
disclaimer!!!! read at ur own cost...... I shall not be responsible for the damage caused!!!! :P
once a women goes to a church to confess to a father.
women: father, father i just called a men yesterday a son of a b*tch.
father: there is no need to confess for that.
women : but father he touched my hands.
father : like this . (father touches her hand) there is no need to confess for that
women: but father he stripped my clothes.
father : like this . (father stripps her clothes) there is no need to confess for that.
women: but father he put his u know what in my u know where.
father : like this . (father makes out with her) there is no need to confess for that.
women : but father he had aids.
father : that son of a b*tch”"”"”"”"”‘
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! This was really peverted ::) but I like the end, this is what you got from doing what's wrong. ;) :P
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You know hindi..? nice..where are you from?
na im egyptian ..i used to be in an indian skool ( but they teach in english dont worry ) ..but i left to an english one to do my IGCSE :p
hehe nice joke :P
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@kimo jesus-u stole my keyboard line
haha
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@kimo jesus-u stole my keyboard line
haha
i couldnt resist looking at it everyday and laughing :P
i gave u credit :P ::) ::)
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@ kimo-the credit is appreciated haha
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This is the 2nd time I read it...lol :P
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anytime u have a 50-50 chance of getting something right ,there's a 90% chance of getting it wrong
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if your parents never have children chances are you would not either
printer not ready...do u have a pen???
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These are real comments made by teachers on their student report cards.
1. Since my last report, your child has hit rock bottom and has started to dig.
2. I would not allow this student to breed.
3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.
4. Your child is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.
7. This child has been working with glue too much.
8. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.
9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.
12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead
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THE HIPPIE AND THE NUN :P
DISCLAIMER: NOT FOR KIDS...... READ AT UR OWN COST>>>>> ;)
One day a hippie gets a ride on a public bus and sees a hot young nun. He sits down next to her and promptly asks if she would like to have sex, to which she immediately says no and walks off the bus. The bus driver leans over and says "Hey guy I know how to get that nun to have sex with you..."
Naturally the hippie asks, and the bus driver tells him that every night at midnight the nun goes to an old graveyard to pray for god to forgive her for her past, and that he should dress up like god and tell the nun she will be forgiven if she has sex with you.
The hippie gives his thanks and runs to the nearest costume shop.
Later that evening the hippie gets ready for his big night and drives down to the graveyard and sees the nun praying, on her knees. He says "Behold, I have heard your prayers and you shall be forgiven if you have sex with me!"
The nun agrees but asks if they can have "backward sex" (i replaced the word because it sounded more offending-backward means through the back part!! ::)) in order to keep her virginity. The hippie agrees and once they are finished the hippie jumps back and pulls off his mask and says "Surpise, its me the Hippie!"
The nun jumps up and pulls off her mask and says "Surprise, its me the bus driver!"
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THE HIPPIE AND THE NUN :P
DISCLAIMER: NOT FOR KIDS...... READ AT UR OWN COST>>>>> ;)
One day a hippie gets a ride on a public bus and sees a hot young nun. He sits down next to her and promptly asks if she would like to have sex, to which she immediately says no and walks off the bus. The bus driver leans over and says "Hey guy I know how to get that nun to have sex with you..."
Naturally the hippie asks, and the bus driver tells him that every night at midnight the nun goes to an old graveyard to pray for god to forgive her for her past, and that he should dress up like god and tell the nun she will be forgiven if she has sex with you.
The hippie gives his thanks and runs to the nearest costume shop.
Later that evening the hippie gets ready for his big night and drives down to the graveyard and sees the nun praying, on her knees. He says "Behold, I have heard your prayers and you shall be forgiven if you have sex with me!"
The nun agrees but asks if they can have "backward sex" (i replaced the word because it sounded more offending-backward means through the back part!! ::)) in order to keep her virginity. The hippie agrees and once they are finished the hippie jumps back and pulls off his mask and says "Surpise, its me the Hippie!"
The nun jumps up and pulls off her mask and says "Surprise, its me the bus driver!"
WOW................ No comment xD ;D ;D :D ;D :D Lol man no one commented on this joke xD hehheehh
OWNED xD
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thanks baladya , nice sig.. ;D
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A simple puzzle can you solve it
IT'S A 7 LETTER WORD..
IF WE REMOVE 1 LETTER FROM IT, IT REMAINS SAME.
IF WE REMOVE 2 LETTERS FROM IT, IT REMAINS SAME.
IF WE REMOVE 3 LETTERS FROM IT, IT REMAINS SAME.
IF WE REMOVE ALL THE LETTERS FROM IT, STILL IT REMAINS SAME.
WHAT IS IT ?
A POSTBOX
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okay..this one!
The story of everybody
This is a story of four people called Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody.
There was some important work that had to be done, and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it.
Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry because of this, since it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody understood that Everybody wouldn't do it.
It ended with Everybody blaming Somebody as Nobody did what Anybody could have done.
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I love you sig Baladya :D
@lord kratos- No comments ::)
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Cold water cleaning
A man went to visit his 90 year old grandfather and while eating the breakfast of eggs and bacon prepared for him, he noticed a film-like substance on his plate. So he says, "Grandfather, are these plates clean?"
His grandfather replies, "Those plates are as clean as cold water can get them, so go on and finish your meal".
That afternoon, while eating the hamburgers his grandfather made for lunch, he noticed many little black specks around the edge of his plate, so again he asked, "Grandfather are you sure these plates are clean"?
Without looking up from his burger, the grandfather says, " I told you those dishes are as clean as coldwater can get them, now don't ask me about it anymore".
Well, later that day, they were on their way out to get dinner. As he was leaving the house, grandfather's dog who was lying on the floor started to growl and would not let him pass.
"Grandfather, your dog won't let me out".
Without diverting his attention from the football game he was watching, his grandfather shouted, "Coldwater, get out of the way"!
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LOOOOOOOOOOL :D :D :D :D :P
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SHIIIIIITTTTTT xD ;D OMG xD looooool
By the way my dad told me the Nobody thing and m still getting lost in the end ;D
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I love you sig Baladya :D
@lord kratos- No comments ::)
Hey nid, ur not gonna be like that when Mony or Astar comes and kicks me :( :-\ HEHEHHEHE ;D ;D ;D Am i the only one not feeling safe !! xD :D ;D
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Hey nid, ur not gonna be like that when Mony or Astar comes and kicks me :( :-\ HEHEHHEHE ;D ;D ;D Am i the only one not feeling safe !! xD :D ;D
Naahh....I'm user friendly ;D :P :P
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A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds when he entered a patient's room. He found Patient #1 sitting on the floor, pretending to saw a piece of wood in half.
Patient #2 was hanging from the ceiling, by his feet.
The doctor asked patient number 1 what he was doing. The patient replied, "Can't you see I'm sawing this piece of wood in half?" The doctor inquired of Patient #1 what Patient #2 was doing. Patient #1 replied, "Oh. He's my friend, but he's a little crazy. He thinks he's a lightbulb." The doctor looks up and notices Patient #2's face is going all red.
The doctor asks Patient #1, "If he's your friend, you should get him down from there before he hurts himself"
Patient #1 replies, "What? And work in the dark?"
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nice one ksitna ;D
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nice one ksitna ;D
thanks ;D
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Egg and chicken lying in bed together. Egg is smoking a cigarette and says to the chicken:
Well, now we know the answer to that question!!!!!! :P
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here's another one ;)
GAS ATTACK!!!! :P
A woman goes to her boyfriend’s parents’ house for dinner. This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous.
They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal. The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole.
The gas pains are almost making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty little fart. It wasn’t loud, but everyone at the table heard the poot.
Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend’s father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing at the women’s feet, and said in a rather stern voice, “Ginger!” The woman thought, “this is great!” and a big smile came across her face.
A couple minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again. This time, she didn’t even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer fart rip.
The father again looked at the dog and yelled, “dammit Ginger!” Once again the woman smiled and thought, “yes!” A few minutes later the woman had to let another one rip.
This time she didn’t even think about it. She let rip with a fart that rivaled a train whistle blowing. Again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled, “dammit Ginger, get away from her before she craps on you!” :P :P
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Hahaha :D
You're improving kratos ;)
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HAHA LOL HILARIOUS NICE
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thanks kim ;D
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yeha lol great :D
here is another one :)
Psychiatrist phone
Hello. Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.
If you are anxious, just start pressing numbers at random.
If you are phobic, don't press anything.
If you are anal retentive, please hold.
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LOOOOOL :P :D
Cracked me up
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LOOOOOL :P :D
Cracked me up
glad it did ;D
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i liked that one..thanks ksitna
End of the year gifts
It was the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils.
The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Flowers." "That's right!" the boy said, "But, how did you know?" "Oh, just a wild guess," she said.
The next pupil was the sweet shop owner's daughter. The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets."
"That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl. "Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher.
The next gift was from the son of the liquor storeowner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop off the leakage with her finger and put it to her tongue. "Is it wine?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied, with some excitement. The teacher repeated the process, tasting a larger drop of the leakage. "Is it champagne?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied, with more excitement. The teacher took one more big taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?"
With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy(dog)!"
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The School Answering Machine
This is the actual answering machine message for a school, check out the messages.
Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. In order to assist you in connecting to the right staff member, please listen to all the options before making a selection:
To lie about why your child is absent – Press 1
To make excuses for why your child did not do his work – Press 2
To complain about what we do – Press 3
To swear at staff members – Press 4
To ask why you didn’t get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you – Press 5
If you want us to raise your child – Press 6
If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone – Press 7
To request another teacher, for the third time this year – Press 8
To complain about bus transportation – Press 9
To complain about school lunches – Press 0
If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable and responsible for his/her own behaviour, class work, homework and that it’s not the teachers’ fault for your child’s lack of effort: Hang up and have a nice day!
If you want this in another language, move to a country that speaks it.
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Hehe...lol
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Susie's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months. Things looked grim, but she was by his bedside every single day. One day as he slipped back into consciousness, he motioned for her to come close to him. She pulled the chair close to the bed and leaned her ear close to be able to hear him.
"You know" he whispered, his eyes filling with tears, "you have been with me through all the bad times. When I got fired, you stuck right beside me. When my business went under, there you were. When we lost the house, you were there. When I got shot, you stuck with me. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. "And you know what?"
"What, dear?" she asked gently, smiling to herself.
"I think you're bad luck."
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Child Psychology
A new teacher thought she would use what she learned in her psychology courses. She said to her class, "Everyone who thinks they are stupid, please stand up."
After a few seconds, one boy stood. "Do you think you're stupid?" she asked.
"No, ma'am, but I just didn't want you to have to stand there all by yourself."
Beauty
A little boy watched, fascinated, as his mother covered her face in cold cream. "Why do you do that?" he asked.
"To make myself beautiful."
When she began to rub it off, the boy asked, "Why are you doing that? Did you give up?"
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Teacher: Jesse, why do you always get so dirty.
Jesse: Well, you see, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
Teacher: Glen, what is the chemical formula for water?
Glen: H I J K L M N O
Teacher: Where did you get that?
Glen: Yesterday you told us it was H to O.
Teacher: Barry, your essay about your dog is exactly the same as your brothers. Did you copy his?
Barry: Ma'am. It's the same dog.
Teacher: Donald, how do you spell crocodile?
Donald: K R O K O D I A L
Teacher: No, that's wrong.
Donald: Maybe it is, but you asked me how I spell it.
Teacher: Name one important thing that we have today which we didn't have ten years ago.
Wendy: Me!
Teacher: George Washington chopped down the cherry tree, but then admitted it. Does anyone know why his father didn't punish him?
Brian: Because he still had the axe in his hand.
Teacher: Danny, do you say a prayer before eating?
Danny: No, ma'am. I don't have to. My mother is a good cook.
Teacher: Jake, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
Jake: A teacher.
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;D good ones :)
hehe ur welcome nobody :)
got another one cumin ur way!!!
What is the time?
A man is strolling past the mental hospital and suddenly remembers an important meeting.
Unfortunately, his watch has stopped, and he cannot tell if he is late or not. Then, he notices a patient similarly strolling about within the hospital fence.
Calling out to the patient, the man says, "Pardon me, sir, but do you have the time?"
The patient calls back, "One moment!" and throws himself upon the ground, pulling out a short stick as he does. He pushes the stick into the ground, and, pulling out a carpenter's level, assures himself that the stick is vertical.
With a compass, the patient locates north and with a steel ruler, measures the precise length of the shadow cast by the stick.
Withdrawing a slide rule from his pocket, the patient calculates rapidly, then swiftly packs up all his tools and turns back to the pedestrian, saying, "It is now precisely 3:29 pm, provided today is August 16th, which I believe it is."
The man can't help but be impressed by this demonstration, and sets his watch accordingly.
Before he leaves, he says to the patient, "That was really quite remarkable, but tell me, what do you do on a cloudy day, or at night, when the stick casts no shadow?" The patient holds up his wrist and says, "I suppose I'd just look at my watch."
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i like this one too
though u may have heard it before
A mental hospital
After hearing that one of the patients in a mental hospital had saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub, the hospital director reviewed the rescuer's file and called him into his office.
"Mr. Haroldson, your records and your heroic behavior indicate that you're ready to go home. I'm only sorry that the man you saved later killed himself with a rope around the neck."
"Oh, he didn't kill himself," Mr. Haroldson replied. "I hung him up to dry."
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looool nice jokes everybody ;D
perfect thread to reduce the tension of exams
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looool nice jokes everybody ;D
perfect thread to reduce the tension of exams
i know right? :D
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i know right? :D
15 min on this topic daily makes me feel better :D
15 mins a day, keeps the doctor away xD ;D ;D
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15 min on this topic daily makes me feel better :D
15 mins a day, keeps the doctor away xD ;D ;D
haha.....there's no denying that :D
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Hey nid, ur not gonna be like that when Mony or Astar comes and kicks me :( :-\ HEHEHHEHE ;D ;D ;D Am i the only one not feeling safe !! xD :D ;D
hahahahaha...our sig is so funny.!
Astar is really nice! He is so funny and friendly. Treats everyone in the best way ever.
Doesn't matter if you are an admi, mod or a member. We all work together as a team to make this forum a better place. =]
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i like this one too
though u may have heard it before
A mental hospital
After hearing that one of the patients in a mental hospital had saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub, the hospital director reviewed the rescuer's file and called him into his office.
"Mr. Haroldson, your records and your heroic behavior indicate that you're ready to go home. I'm only sorry that the man you saved later killed himself with a rope around the neck."
"Oh, he didn't kill himself," Mr. Haroldson replied. "I hung him up to dry."
hahaha nice 1 :P remiinds me of this egyptian one
an egyptian man fell down in a very deep hole..so they threw him a rope..he came back up as a dead man...
( he tied the rop on this neck ) hehe :P
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This is only for Bob Marley fans, other lamers who don't listen to him, don't read... (jk ofc xD ;D U just might not get some :P)
Q. Why did they have so much trouble burying Bob Marley?
A. His coffin kept jammin'
Q: How does Bob Marley like his doughnuts?
A: Wi' jam in! ('We jammin')
What did Bob Marley say when his wife left him and took the TV?
No Woman No Sky.
What did Bob Marley say when his wife left him and took the oven?
No Woman, No Pie
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FLAT ....... WOMAN !!!! :P
A woman has a really flat chest so she's very sad about her flat chest...
As she was weeping alone at night,a fairy god mother comes and says what's the matter, why r u crying my child n she says my chest is too flat then the fairy says ok.I'll help u.Every time a man says pardon to u,ur breasts will grow an inch . Later she's walking down the street n a man runs into her n said o pardon me n her boobs grow an inch.
The women is very pleased. Later on that day the same thing happened twice!! . That night she went to a restaurant n the waiter spilled some wine on her dress and the waiter says o 1000 pardons madam!!!!
:o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
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FLAT ....... WOMAN !!!! :P
A woman has a really flat chest so she's very sad about her flat chest...
As she was weeping alone at night,a fairy god mother comes and says what's the matter, why r u crying my child n she says my chest is too flat then the fairy says ok.I'll help u.Every time a man says pardon to u,ur breasts will grow an inch . Later she's walking down the street n a man runs into her n said o pardon me n her boobs grow an inch.
The women is very pleased. Later on that day the same thing happened twice!! . That night she went to a restaurant n the waiter spilled some wine on her dress and the waiter says o 1000 pardons madam!!!!
:o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
MUAHAHAHAHHAH xD ;D ;D ;D
Dude u gotta stop these jokes xD Awesome but wrong place ;) :D :D
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DRUNKEN REINCARNATION :P
James, as usual, came home really late one Saturday night after being at the bar all night drinking. Not only was he drunk, he was sloppy drunk. He carefully crept into bed next his wife, who fell sleep angry hours earlier, and gave her a goodnight kiss on the check in hopes that she wouldn't wake up.
He awoke in the middle of the night to a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe. "Who the hell are you," demanded James, "and what are you doing in my bedroom?" The mysterious man answered "This is not your bedroom, and my name is St. Peter".
James didn't take the news so well... "You mean I'm dead! That can't be, I have so much to live for, I haven't even said goodbye to my family... you've got to send me back right away!"
St. Peter replied "You cannot go back as you were, you have passed away James. However, you can be reincarnated - but there is a catch. We can only send you back as a dog or a hen." James was devastated, but knowing that there was a farm just down the road from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.
A flash of light later, he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking at corn on the ground. "This ain't so bad," he thought until he felt a strange feeling churning inside him. The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen, huh? How are you enjoying your first day here?" "It's not so bad" repliesJames , "but I have this strange feeling inside like I'm about to explode". "You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "haven't you ever laid an egg before?"
"Never" replies James.
"Well just relax and let it happen."
And so he did, and just a few uncomfortable seconds later an egg pops out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him - emotions got the better of him as he experienced the joy motherhood for the first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that ever happened to him... ever!
The joy of motherhood continued to build and, just as he was just about to lay his third egg, he felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shout "James, wake up you drunken bas*ard, you're sh*tting the bed!" :P
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thanks baladya ;D, I like the way the admin kicks the user in ur sig!!! ;)
Such a powerful kick :o, I can only pray for the old granny that her brain didnot get squashed!!!! ::) :P
and I can only hope that the admins in this forum dont have a badass kick like that!!!! ;)
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DRUNKEN REINCARNATION :P
James, as usual, came home really late one Saturday night after being at the bar all night drinking. Not only was he drunk, he was sloppy drunk. He carefully crept into bed next his wife, who fell sleep angry hours earlier, and gave her a goodnight kiss on the check in hopes that she wouldn't wake up.
He awoke in the middle of the night to a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe. "Who the hell are you," demanded James, "and what are you doing in my bedroom?" The mysterious man answered "This is not your bedroom, and my name is St. Peter".
James didn't take the news so well... "You mean I'm dead! That can't be, I have so much to live for, I haven't even said goodbye to my family... you've got to send me back right away!"
St. Peter replied "You cannot go back as you were, you have passed away James. However, you can be reincarnated - but there is a catch. We can only send you back as a dog or a hen." James was devastated, but knowing that there was a farm just down the road from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.
A flash of light later, he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking at corn on the ground. "This ain't so bad," he thought until he felt a strange feeling churning inside him. The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen, huh? How are you enjoying your first day here?" "It's not so bad" repliesJames , "but I have this strange feeling inside like I'm about to explode". "You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "haven't you ever laid an egg before?"
"Never" replies James.
"Well just relax and let it happen."
And so he did, and just a few uncomfortable seconds later an egg pops out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him - emotions got the better of him as he experienced the joy motherhood for the first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that ever happened to him... ever!
The joy of motherhood continued to build and, just as he was just about to lay his third egg, he felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shout "James, wake up you drunken bas*ard, you're sh*tting the bed!" :P
disgusting :P btu nice 1 :P
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hahaha nice 1 :P remiinds me of this egyptian one
an egyptian man fell down in a very deep hole..so they threw him a rope..he came back up as a dead man...
( he tied the rop on this neck ) hehe :P
loll haha
thank u :D
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An old man decided his old wife was getting hard of hearing. So he called her doctor to make an appointment to have her hearing checked. The doctor said he could see her in two weeks, and meanwhile there's a simple, informal test the husband could do to give the doctor some idea of the dimensions of the problem.
"Here's what you do. Start about 40 feet away from her, and speak in a normal onversational tone and see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response."
So that evening she's in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he's in the living room, and he says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens."
"Honey, what's for supper?"
No response.
So he moves to the other end of the room, about 30 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?"
No response.
So he moves into the dining room, about 20 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?"
No response.
On to the kitchen door, only 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?".
No response.
So he walks right up behind her. "Honey, what's for supper?"
"For the fifth time, CHICKEN!"
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Nice ksitna!!!! ;D
poor old guy :P :P
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hahahaha! nice one! :D
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hehe thanks
i felt sorry for him too :P
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Two unemployed guys are talking. One says, “I’m going to become a lion tamer.”The other replies, “That’s crazy, you don’t know nothing about no lion taming.
”"Yes I do!”"Well, OK, answer me this. When one of those lions comes at you all roaring and biting, what you gonna do?”"Well, then I take that big chair they all carry, and I stick it in his face until he backs down.
”"Well, what if the lion takes that big paw, and hooks the chair with them big claws, and throws that chair out of the cage? What do you do then?”"Well, then I takes that whip they all carry, and I whip him and whip him until he backs down.
”"Well, what if that lion bites that whip with his big teeth, and bites it in two? What you gonna do then?”"Well, then I take that gun they all carry, and I shoot him.
”"Well, what if that gun doesn’t work? What will you do then?”
"Well, then I pick up some of the sh*t that’s on the bottom of the cage, and I throw it in his eyes, and I run out ofthe cage.”
"Well, what if there ain’t no sh*t in the bottom of the cage? What you gonna do then?”
"Well, that’s dumb. Cause if that lion comes at me, and he throws the chair out of the cage, and he bites the whip in two, and my gun don’t work, there’s going to be some sh*t on the bottom of that cage, you can bet on that.” :P :P
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nice one kratos :)
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lmao!! :D :D :P
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Wrong Color Suit
An old lady was very upset as her husband Albert had just passed away. She went to the undertakers to have one last look at her dearly departed husband. The instant she saw him she started crying. The mortician walked over to comfort her. Through her tears she explained that she was upset because her dearest Albert was wearing a black suit, and it was his fervent wish to be buried in a blue suit.
The mortician apologized and explained that traditionally they always put bodies in a black suit, but he'd see what he could arrange.
The next day she returned to the funeral parlor to have one last moment with Albert before the funeral the following day.
When the mortician pulled back the curtain, she managed a smile through her tears as Albert was resplendent in a smart blue suit. She said to the mortician, "Wonderful, wonderful, but where did you get that beautiful suit?"
"Well, yesterday afternoon after you left, a man about your husband's size was brought in and he was wearing a blue suit," the mortician replied. "His wife was quite upset because she wanted him buried in the traditional black suit."
Albert's wife smiled at the undertaker.
"After that," he continued, "it was just a matter of swapping the heads."
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Three sisters, ages 92, 94, and 96, live in a house together. One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts one foot in a pauses. She yells down the stairs, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?"
The 94-year-old yells back, "I don't know. I'll come up and see." She starts up the stairs and pauses. Then she yells out, "Was I going up the stairs or down?"
The 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea and listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful." She knocks on wood for good measure. She then replies, "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door."
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LOL :P
nice ones
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thanks ksitna and nid!!! ;D
ksitna, both jokes were freakin awesome!!!! :o :o
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Thank youuu :D
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COBRA AND THE FRIENDS AND..........
Two best friends are lost in the rain forest trying to find away out when one of them is attacked by a cobra that attacks the “stuff” of the victim. The other despaired, calls the doctor using his sat phone.
-doctor! my friend has just been stung by a snake, what should I do, he is dying!
- take it easy says the doctor, you just have to suck out the area that has been stung.!
so the guys closes the flip of his cell phone when the other victimized asks: what did he say?
-he said that you are dead
:P :P :P :P :P
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Two unemployed guys are talking. One says, “I’m going to become a lion tamer.”The other replies, “That’s crazy, you don’t know nothing about no lion taming.
”"Yes I do!”"Well, OK, answer me this. When one of those lions comes at you all roaring and biting, what you gonna do?”"Well, then I take that big chair they all carry, and I stick it in his face until he backs down.
”"Well, what if the lion takes that big paw, and hooks the chair with them big claws, and throws that chair out of the cage? What do you do then?”"Well, then I takes that whip they all carry, and I whip him and whip him until he backs down.
”"Well, what if that lion bites that whip with his big teeth, and bites it in two? What you gonna do then?”"Well, then I take that gun they all carry, and I shoot him.
”"Well, what if that gun doesn’t work? What will you do then?”
"Well, then I pick up some of the sh*t that’s on the bottom of the cage, and I throw it in his eyes, and I run out ofthe cage.”
"Well, what if there ain’t no sh*t in the bottom of the cage? What you gonna do then?”
"Well, that’s dumb. Cause if that lion comes at me, and he throws the chair out of the cage, and he bites the whip in two, and my gun don’t work, there’s going to be some sh*t on the bottom of that cage, you can bet on that.” :P :P
looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool :P
thx guys keep it comin :P
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LMAO!!! :D :D
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lolll good one!!!! ;D
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thanks ;)
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GUY, MAID AND SWIMMING POOL!!! ;D
A guy dials his home and a strange woman answers.
The guy says, ”Who is this?”
”This is the maid,” answers the woman.
”We don’t have a maid,” says the man.
The woman says, ”I was hired this morning by the lady of the house.”
The man says, ”Well, this is her husband. Is she there?”
The woman replies, ”She is upstairs in the bed room with someone who I figured was her husband.”
The guy is fuming and says to the maid, ”Listen, would you like to make $50,000?”
The maid says, ”What will I have to do?”
The man tells her, ”I want you to get my gun from the desk, and shoot the Bi*ch and the jerk she’s with.”
The maid puts the phone down; the man hears footsteps and then two gun shots.
The maid comes back to the phone, ”What do I do with the bodies?”
The man says, ”Throw them in the swimming pool.”
Puzzled, the maid answers, ”But you don’t have a pool.”
A long pause and the man says, ”Is this 567-5309?”
:P :P :P :P :P
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hahahahahahahahaha!!! lol :P :P
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loll poor guy :D
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Efficiency Expert Joke :P
A couple was having dinner in a nice restaurant,when they noticed that each of the waiters had a spoon in their shirt pocket.
When they asked their waiter why,he explained that an efficiency expert had determined that if they carried a spoon with them they would save a significant amount of time not going to the kitchen if someone dropped one.
A while later they noticed that the waiters also had a string hanging out of their flys.When asked, the waiter explained that it was because they were told that when they went to the bathroom,if they tied the string to their private part they could use the string to remove it from their pants and then wouldn't have to wash their hands, saving important time.
Well OK, said the customer,but how do you get it back in your pants? Oh that's easy,says the waiter, we use the spoon.
:o :o :o :o :o :o
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Efficiency Expert Joke :P
A couple was having dinner in a nice restaurant,when they noticed that each of the waiters had a spoon in their shirt pocket.
When they asked their waiter why,he explained that an efficiency expert had determined that if they carried a spoon with them they would save a significant amount of time not going to the kitchen if someone dropped one.
A while later they noticed that the waiters also had a string hanging out of their flys.When asked, the waiter explained that it was because they were told that when they went to the bathroom,if they tied the string to their private part they could use the string to remove it from their pants and then wouldn't have to wash their hands, saving important time.
Well OK, said the customer,but how do you get it back in your pants? Oh that's easy,says the waiter, we use the spoon.
:o :o :o :o :o :o
hahahahaha...that made me laugh...good one!
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ohhhh grosss :-[
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ooh, thanks.. ;)
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The following story is true......
NASA AND RUSSIA!!! ;D
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 C. The Russians used a pencil.
;) ;)
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The following story is true......
NASA AND RUSSIA!!! ;D
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 C. The Russians used a pencil.
;) ;)
Americans are really ...they can't beat us in knowledge.
i heard same thing in a movie.
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loved it :P
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thank u ;D
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Disclaimer: The following joke is not for kids!!!!! :P U have already been warned!!!! :P
Polio,measles and smallpox....... :P
A man and woman just got married and were spending their first night together. They were both starting to undress and the man took his shoes and socks off first.
The woman looked at his toes all red and curled in and asked, “What happened to your toes?”
So he answered, “I suffered from a childhood disease called Tolio.”
Woman: Don’t you mean Polio?
Man: No, Tolio only affects the toes.
Then they continue undressing and he takes his pants off and she notices that his knees are real ugly and crooked so she asks him what happened.
Man: I also suffered from Kneasles.
Woman: Don’t you mean Measles?
Man: No, Kneasles. It only affects the knees.
So finally he takes his underwear off and the wife takes one look and seems disappointed.
Man: I CAN EXPLAIN!!!
Woman: Don’t tell me…
… You also had smallcox?
:P :P :P :P :P
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Disclaimer: The following joke is not for kids!!!!! :P U have been already warned!!!! :P
Polio,measles and smallpox....... :P
A man and woman just got married and were spending their first night together. They were both starting to undress and the man took his shoes and socks off first.
The woman looked at his toes all red and curled in and asked, “What happened to your toes?”
So he answered, “I suffered from a childhood disease called Tolio.”
Woman: Don’t you mean Polio?
Man: No, Tolio only affects the toes.
Then they continue undressing and he takes his pants off and she notices that his knees are real ugly and crooked so she asks him what happened.
Man: I also suffered from Kneasles.
Woman: Don’t you mean Measles?
Man: No, Kneasles. It only affects the knees.
So finally he takes his underwear off and the wife takes one look and seems disappointed.
Man: I CAN EXPLAIN!!!
Woman: Don’t tell me…
… You also had smallcox?
:P :P :P :P :P
hahahahahahahahaahahaha....hahahahahahahaha...
where do u get jokes like these from??
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simple , I have a huge database of 10 million jokes .
I just take these jokes from the database!! :P
just kidding
I use google!!!
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LMAOOOOOOOOOO...THTS HILARIOUS!!!!!!!
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Husband installation
A woman writes to the Technical support person!
Dear Tech Support ,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5..0 .
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NEWS 5.0, MONEY 3.0 and FOOTBALL 4.1 Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2. 6 simply crashes the system.
Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no available.
What can I do?
Signed,
XYZ Woman
***********************************************
DEAR XYZ Madam,
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Please enter command: i thought you loved me and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly, You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Hot Looks 7.7.
Good Luck Madam!
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LOL !! awesome !! :D :D
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awesome joke NOBODY ;D
NOBODY IS coooooooool !!!!!! :P
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greattt :D
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Men are Priceless!
While on a road trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant, and resumed their trip.
When leaving, the elderly woman unknowingly left her glasses on the table, and she didn't miss them until they had been driving about forty minutes. By then, to add to the aggravation, they had to travel quite a distance before they could find a place to turn around, in order to return to the restaurant to retrieve her glasses.
All the way back, the elderly husband became the classic grouchy old man. He fussed and complained, and scolded his wife relentlessly during the entire return drive. The more he chided her, the more agitated he became. He just wouldn't let up one minute.
To her relief, they finally arrived at the restaurant. As the woman got out of the car, and hurried inside to retrieve her glasses, the old geezer yelled to her, 'While you're in there, you might as well get my hat and the credit card.'
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Thank you....ONE more!
Did you see me rob the bank?
A man burst into a crowded bank, ordered everyone into a corner, and then got his bag filled with packets of money.
But instead of running out, he approached the crowd of terrified customers. He picked out one and asked, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "Yes sir, I did."
The robber then shot him in the temple, killing him instantly.
He then turned to a couple standing next to him and asked the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
"No sir, I sure didn't," the man replied -- "But my wife did."
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ha haa haaaaa omg , hilarious!!!!!! ;D
Nobody is good!!!!! ;D
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AWESOME JOKES MAN!! AWESOME!!
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i have got tonnes of these....
keep reading!
Why men wear ear rings?
I have often wondered how this trend got started, I now have the answer.
A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring. This man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion sense."
The man walks up to him and says, "I didn't know you were into earrings."
"Don't make such a big deal, it's only an earring, "he replies sheepishly.
His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his curiosity prods him to say, "So, how long have you been wearing one?"
"Ever since my wife found it in my car."
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read this
Girls night out
Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.
The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'
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I have read both of them before but they r still awesome!!!! ;D
+rep to u for making me laugh!!!! :D
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Must Read for Every Man and of course Woman (to understand man)
If a female is reading this article then just realize the value of a man, and if its a male then feel proud of after reading it!
"One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river, his axe fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you crying?"
The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water, and he needed the axe to make his living.
The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord again went down and came up with a silver Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord went down again and came up with an iron Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.
Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the riverbank, and his wife fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"
"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"
The Lord went down into the water and came up with ANGELINA JOLIE "Is this your wife?" the Lord asked.
"Yes," cried the woodcutter.
The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"
The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding.
You see, if I had said 'no' to ANGELINA JOLIE , You would have come up with CAMERON DIAZ . Then if I said 'no' to her, you would have come up with my wife. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three.
Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care of all three wives, so THAT'S why I said yes to ANGELINA JOLIE ."
The moral of this story is: Whenever a man lies, it is for a good and honorable reason, and for the benefit of others.
That's our story, and we're sticking to it! - "WE ARE HONORABLE MEN!"
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An absolutely Brilliant Joke, ENJOY!!!
A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the
ball into the woods.
She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog
in a trap.
The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I
will grant you three wishes."
The woman freed the frog, and the frog said,
"Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times of it!" The woman
said, "That's okay."
For her first wish, she wanted to be the most
beautiful woman in the world.
The frog warned her, "You do realize that this
wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis
whom women will flock to".
The woman replied, "That's okay, because I will
be the most beautiful woman and he will have eyes only for me."
So, KAZAM-
she's the most beautiful Woman in the world!
For her second wish, she
wanted to be the richest woman in the world.
The frog said, "That will make
your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than
you. "
The woman said, "That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's
his is mine."
So, KAZAM- she's the richest woman in the world!
The
frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like to have a
mild heart attack."
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't
mess with them.
Attention
female readers:
This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue
feeling good!
Male
readers: Please scroll down.
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The man had a heart attack ten times
"milder" than his wife!!!
Moral of the story : Women are really dumb but think they're really smart .
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show
PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!
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nice one both nobody and immortal!!!! ;D
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Lawyer Joke
10 Husbands, Still a Virgin
A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.
On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
"What?" said the puzzled groom.
"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"
-
Lawyer Joke
10 Husbands, Still a Virgin
A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.
On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
"What?" said the puzzled groom.
"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"
this one was the best...hahahaha :D ;)
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loool Thanks :D
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WAHAHAAHAH read this b4 and its still awesome xD
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this is 4 immortal nd nodoby!!!
Advantages Of Being A Woman
Why it's better to be a Woman!
1. We got off the Titanic first.
2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.
4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.
6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.
7. Taxis stop for us.
8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).
11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.
12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.
13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.
15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.
18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.
19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.
22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.
23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.
25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.
26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.
28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.
30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.
-
Disclaimer: The following joke is not for kids!!!!!
* What is the difference between a woman and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side!
* God made man and then rested. God made women and then no one rested
* I'M AN ALIEN. I HAVE JUST TRANSFORMED MYSELF INTO THIS TEST. AS YOU ARE READING I'M HAVING SEX WITH YOUR EYEBALLS. I KNOW THAT YOU LIKE IT BECAUSE YOU ARE SMILING
* Sex is like programing; One mistake, and YOU WILL HAVE TO SUPPORT IT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE .
* First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering.
* Love makes life so confusing but without love would you want to live?
* Why were males created before females? Cos you always need a rough draft before the final copy..
* I think drinking and driving is terrible. You always spill it when you change gears....
* Any woman that thinks the way to a mans heart is through his stomach is aiming just a little too high.
* A chicken sandwidch walked into the bar, ordered some food and beer. The bartender says: "Sorry, we don't serve food here".
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Q. What did God say after creating Adam
A. I must be able to do better than that.
Q. How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
A. Put the remote control between his toes.
Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A. A widow.
Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm cells to fertilize one egg?
A. They won't stop to ask for directions.
Q. Why does a penis have a hole in the end?
A. So men can be open minded.
Q. How are men and parking spots alike?
A. Good ones are always taken. Free ones are mostly handicapped or extremely small.
Q. What is the one thing that all men at single bars have in common?
A. They are all married.
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soooo funny ::)
Clearly its no point arguing :P :P
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First was the best. Girls Win
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First was the best. Girls Win
Dude, ure backing da wrong side ???
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Dogs and Light Bulbs
How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?
Border Collie: Just one.
Then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
Rottweiler: Make me"
Lab: Oh, me, me"
Pleeease let me change the light bulb"
Can I?
Huh?
Huh?
Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp"
Malamute: Let the Border Collie do it.
You can feed me while he's busy.
Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls.
Greyhound: It isn't moving.
Who cares?
Cocker Spaniel: Why change it?
I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
Mastiff: Screw it yourself"
I'm not afraid of the dark...
Doberman: While it's out, I'll just take a nap on the couch.
Boxer: Who needs light?
I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.
Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there"
Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb?
Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...
Old English Sheep dog: Light bulb?
That thing I just ate was a light bulb?
Basset Hound: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
Westie: Dogs do not change light bulbs -- people change light bulbs.
I am not one of THEM so the question is, how long before I can expect my light again?
Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it.
By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out bulb?
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a nerdy way
difference between man and woman.
man has XY chormosomes
woman has XX chromosomes.
:P, im good at spoiling any kind of jokes (even though im improving)
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HOLY SH*T!!!!!!! :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
I fell off my chair while reading these jokes, literally!!!!
Nobody,immortal,dodi23 all those jokes were freakin awesome!!!! ;D ;D
yeah, consolation prize goes to ksitna and SGVaibhav ;) ;)
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WARNING : NOT FOR KIDS!!!!!! :P
BEST PICKUP LINES CONTINUED!!!!! :P :P :P
Are you an overdue book? Because you’ve got FINE written all over you!
If I had a garden I’d put your tulips and my tulips together.
Are you from Tennesse??
Cuz you’re the only ten-I-see…
What are you doing tonight, besides me....
Hey babe, when i was younger i was very popular. girls run after me, that's after a throw rocks at them.
You are one tall glass of water and im tellin you straight up…im thirsty!
Baby, if I was a squirrell & you were a tree, I would put my nuts in your hole .
Hey, I’m lost, can you help me find the way to your house?
Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?!!!!
YOUR MOM WAS BETTER LAST NIGHT, WANNA PROVE ME WRONG ?!!!!
What has 142 teeth and holds back "the incredible hulk"? My zipper!!!!!
:P :P ;D ;D ;) ;) :P :P
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lol :D :P
Daily dose of this thread can bring back a smile :)
Thanks to you guys
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Child's Prayer
One night, a father passed by his son's room and heard his son praying: "God bless Mommy, Daddy, and Grandma. Ta ta, Grandpa."
The father didn't quite know what this meant, but was glad his son was praying. The next morning, they found Grandpa dead on the floor of a heart attack. The father reassured himself that it was just a coincidence, but was still a bit spooked.
The next night, he heard his son praying again: "God bless Mommy and Daddy. Ta ta, Grandma."
The father was worried, but decided to wait until morning. Sure enough, the next morning Grandma was on the floor, dead of a heart attack.
Really scared now, the father decided to wait outside his son's door the next night. And sure enough, the boy started to pray: "God bless Mommy. Ta ta, Daddy."
Now the father was crapping his pants. He stayed up all night, and went to the doctor's early the next day to make sure his health was fine. When he finally came home, his wife was waiting on the porch. She said, "Thank God you're here -- we could really use your help! We found milkman dead on our porch this morning!"
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What we sell
Two Australian businessmen in Brisbane were sitting down for a break in their new store. As yet, the store wasn't ready, with no stock and only a few shelves set up.
One said to the other, 'I bet any minute now some idiot tourist is going to walk by, put his face to the window, and ask what we're selling'.
No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious Japanese tourist walked to the window, had a peek, and in a thick Japanese accent asked 'What you sell?' One of the men replied sarcastically, 'We're selling arse-holes.'
Without skipping a beat, the Japanese man said, 'Ah Sooo You doing velly well, only two left'.
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What we sell
Two Australian businessmen in Brisbane were sitting down for a break in their new store. As yet, the store wasn't ready, with no stock and only a few shelves set up.
One said to the other, 'I bet any minute now some idiot tourist is going to walk by, put his face to the window, and ask what we're selling'.
No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious Japanese tourist walked to the window, had a peek, and in a thick Japanese accent asked 'What you sell?' One of the men replied sarcastically, 'We're selling arse-holes.'
Without skipping a beat, the Japanese man said, 'Ah Sooo You doing velly well, only two left'.
lol:D
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immortal , both jokes were cool!!! 8)
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Ya Doctor! I have a serious problem, I can never remember what i just said.
When did you first notice this problem?
What problem?
Old Man Marries a Young Woman
After marrying a young woman, a 90-year-old man told his doctor that they were expecting a baby.
"Let me tell you a story," said the doctor. "An absent-minded fellow went hunting, but instead of a gun, he brought an umbrella. Suddenly a bear charged at him. Pointing his umbrella at the bear, he shot and killed it on the spot."
"Impossible!" the Old Man said "Somebody else must have shot that bear."
"Exactly," replied the doctor.
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Ya Doctor! I have a serious problem, I can never remember what i just said.
When did you first notice this problem?
What problem?
Old Man Marries a Young Woman
After marrying a young woman, a 90-year-old man told his doctor that they were expecting a baby.
"Let me tell you a story," said the doctor. "An absent-minded fellow went hunting, but instead of a gun, he brought an umbrella. Suddenly a bear charged at him. Pointing his umbrella at the bear, he shot and killed it on the spot."
"Impossible!" the Old Man said "Somebody else must have shot that bear."
"Exactly," replied the doctor.
hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahha :D :D :D :D :D ;D
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Kimo jesus - nice one!!!! ;)
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Ya Doctor! I have a serious problem, I can never remember what i just said.
When did you first notice this problem?
What problem?
Old Man Marries a Young Woman
After marrying a young woman, a 90-year-old man told his doctor that they were expecting a baby.
"Let me tell you a story," said the doctor. "An absent-minded fellow went hunting, but instead of a gun, he brought an umbrella. Suddenly a bear charged at him. Pointing his umbrella at the bear, he shot and killed it on the spot."
"Impossible!" the Old Man said "Somebody else must have shot that bear."
"Exactly," replied the doctor.
lol :P :D
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WORDS OF WISDOM!!! :P
Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.
It take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it.
Baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk.
He who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet many moons
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
It's always darkest before dawn.
So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.
Man who farts in church sits in his own pew.
Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with stinky fingers. :P
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A retired gentleman ::)
A retired gentleman went to Social Welfare Office to apply for the Old Age Pension. The woman behind the counter asked him for his driver's license to verify his age. He looked in his pockets and realized he had left his wallet at home.
He told the woman that he was very sorry but he seemed to have left his wallet at home. "I will have to go home and come back later." he said.
The woman says, "Unbutton your shirt." So he opens his shirt revealing curly silver hair. She says, "That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me" and she processed his Old Age Pension application.
When he returned home, the man excitedly tells his wife about his experience at the Welfare office. She says, "You should have dropped your pants. You might have got the Disability Pension, too."
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Nice one !!!! just read it yesterday but still nice ;)
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here's another :P
Gynecologist Guessing Game ::)
A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a local gynecologist. The doctor took one look at her and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately asked her to undress, afterwhich the doctor began to stroke her thigh.
Doing so, he asked her, "Do you know what I'm doing?" "Yes," she replied, "you're checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities." "That is right," said the doctor.
He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do you know what I'm doing now?" he asked. "Yes," the woman said, "you're checking for any lumps or breast cancer." "Correct," replied the shady doctor.
Finally, he mounted his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked, "Do you know what I'm doing now?" "Yes," she said. "You're getting herpes; which is why I came here in the first place." :o
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Here's another one ;)
From a Gynecologist ::)
A man comes into the ER and yells, 'My wife's going to have her babyin the cab!' I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs, and I was in the wrong one. ::)
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HAHHAHAAH xD Nice jokes guys :D ;D
And Kratos, dont steal Einstein's quotes >.< ;D
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I like Einstein 8)
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Password rejected
A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate
point in the process, told him that he would now need to enter a password.
Something he will use to log on.
The husband was in a rather humorous mood and figured he would try for the shock
effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to
enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was keying
in.
"P....E....N....I....S.."
His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:
**** PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH*****
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holy sh*t!!!!! :o
awesome dude!!!!!
immortal, u really r IMMORTAL!!!! ;D
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tsk tsk tsk....
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holy sh*t!!!!! :o
awesome dude!!!!!
immortal, u really r IMMORTAL!!!! ;D
Thanks ;D ;D
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WARNING: ONLY FOR BOYS!!!! :P
so , let's continue!!! ;D
Little Johnny's Playing Partner ::)
Little Johnny is walking down the hall when he hears a weird (u know what I mean ::)) noise from his parents room. He knocks on the door and asks his mom what's going on. "Playing cards," she replies. "Who's your partner?" asked little johnny. "Your father!"
Content with his answer, Little Johnny walks further down the hall towards his room when he hears the same noise coming from his sister's room. Again, he knocks on the door and asked his sister what was she doing. "Playing cards." "With who?" he asks. "My boyfriend!" she says.
A short while later, Little Johnny's father is walking down the hall and hears a noise coming from Little Johnny's room. He knocks on the door and asks "What are you doing?" "Playing cards!" replied Johnny. "Who's your partner?" asked his father...
Little Johnny answers promptly, "With a hand like this who needs a partner?" ::) :P
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hahahhahahahahahahhaahahahha
password!!!!!!! hahaha
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Password rejected
A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate
point in the process, told him that he would now need to enter a password.
Something he will use to log on.
The husband was in a rather humorous mood and figured he would try for the shock
effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to
enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was keying
in.
"P....E....N....I....S.."
His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:
**** PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH*****
HAHHAHHAH OMG Best joke for today :D :D :D
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dude thats too perverted :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
some ppl might get offended !
my fav one anyway
8.What is the lightest thing in the world?
A penis…even a thought can raise it.
hHAHAHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAH BUT STILL :-X :-X :-X
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looooool sick but hilarious!!!!!! :D :D
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alright, i am going to remove it..... :)
EDIT - Alright, removed it!! ;)
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alright, i am going to remove it..... :)
lol cheers ! good man ! but im keeping my fav one on :P
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Password rejected
A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate
point in the process, told him that he would now need to enter a password.
Something he will use to log on.
The husband was in a rather humorous mood and figured he would try for the shock
effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to
enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was keying
in.
"P....E....N....I....S.."
His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:
**** PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH*****
hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.........
thats seriously the best one that i have heard till now....
hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha......... still can't stop laughing'
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resons why god created eve:
10. God worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the garden because he would not ask for directions.
9. God knew that Adam would one day require someone to locate and hand him the TV remote.
8. God knew that Adam would never go out and get himself a new fig leaf when his seat wore out and would, therefore, need Eve to go get one for him.
7. God knew that Adam would never be able to make a doctor's, dentist, or haircut appointment for himself.
6. God knew that Adam would never be able to remember which night to put the garbage on the curb.
5. God knew that if the world was to be populated, men would never be able to handle the pain and discomfort of childbearing.
4. As "Keeper of the Garden," Adam would never remember where he left his tools.
3. Apparently, Adam needed someone to blame his troubles on when God caught him hiding in the garden.
2. As the Bible says, "It is not good for man to be alone!" And finally, the number ONE reason that God created Eve...
1. When God finished the creation of Adam, He stepped back, scratched His head, and said, "I can do better than THAT!"
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another 1:
John was sitting outside his local pub one day, enjoying a quiet pint and generally feeling good about himself, when a nun suddenly appears at his table and starts decrying the evils of drink.
"You should be ashamed of yourself young man! Drinking is a Sin! Alcohol is the blood of the devil!"
Now John gets pretty annoyed about this, and goes on the offensive.
"How do you know this, Sister?"
"My Mother Superior told me so."
"But have you ever had a drink yourself? How can you be sure that what you are saying is right?"
"Don't be ridiculous--of course I have never taken alcohol myself"
"Then let me buy you a drink - if you still believe afterwards that it is evil I will give up drink for life"
"How could I, a Nun, sit outside this public house drinking?!"
"I'll get the barman to put it in a teacup for you, then no one will ever know."
The Nun reluctantly agrees, so John goes inside to the bar.
"Another pint for me, and a triple vodka on the rocks", then he lowers his voice and says to the barman "and could you put the vodka in a teacup?"
"Oh no! It's not that Nun again is it?"
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Password rejected
A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate
point in the process, told him that he would now need to enter a password.
Something he will use to log on.
The husband was in a rather humorous mood and figured he would try for the shock
effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to
enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was keying
in.
"P....E....N....I....S.."
His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:
**** PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH*****
this one is sooooo old...but still made me laugh..:D
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resons why god created eve:
10. God worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the garden because he would not ask for directions.
It waz eve who persisted on Adam on eating da forbidden fruit >:( , thus ure other points r baseless..
if u deny da fact v arnt in heaven because Eve.
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It waz eve who persisted on Adam on eating da forbidden fruit >:( , thus ure other points r baseless..
if u deny da fact v arnt in heaven because Eve.
i agree
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Alright guys, lets not argue ;D.
To lighten the mood, here's another one ;)
IF THE RING FITS, WEAR IT :P
A man went to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis.
According to the nurse attending, the patient's girl friend found the ring in his pants pocket and she got so mad at him, she used petroleum jelly to slip the ring on his penis while he was asleep.
I don't know what's worse:
1) Having your girl friend find out you're married.
2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis.
3) Or finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring. :P
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Alright, here's another one ;D This one's hilarious ;)
NEED A BAD DAY TO GET INTO HEAVEN ::)
It got crowded in heaven so, for one day and one day only, it was decided to only accept people who had really bad day on the day they died.
St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates and said to the first man, "Tell me about the day you died." The man said, "Oh, it was awful. I was sure my wife was having an affair, so I came home early to catch her with him. I searched all over the apartment but couldn't find him anywhere. So I went out onto the balcony, we live on the 25th floor, and found this man hanging over the edge by his fingertips. I went inside, got a hammer, and started hitting his hands. He fell, but landed in some bushes. So, I got the refrigerator and pushed it over the balcony and it crushed him. The strain of the act gave me a heart attack, of which I died from."
St. Peter couldn't deny that this was a pretty bad day, and since it was a crime of passion, he let the man in. He then asked the next man in line about the day he died. "Well, sir, it was awful," said the second man. "I was doing aerobics on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment when I twisted my ankle and slipped over the edge. I managed to grab the balcony ofthe apartment below, but some maniac came out and started pounding on my fingers with a hammer. Luckily I landed in some bushes. But, then the guy dropped a refrigerator on me!"
St. Peter chuckled, let him into heaven and decided he could really start to enjoy this job. "Tell me about the day you died?” he said to the third man in line. "OK, picture this; I'm naked, hiding inside a refrigerator...."
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hahahahaha.........nice one
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hahaha lord nice ones :P
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Since Nobody's posting, I'll continue :P
Sexy Watch
A man is sitting at a bar one night, wearing a fancy new watch, covered with buttons and lights and dials. The woman next to him says, "Wow, that's a really fancy watch." Thanks, says the guy, "It's the cutting edge of technology. I can telepathically ask this watch anything I want to know, and it'll answer me, telepathically."
"Rubbish," says the girl.
"No, it's true," says that guy. "Look, tell you what, I'll prove it. I'll ask it if you've got any panties on."
The guy scrunches up his eyes for a moment, as if concentrating hard to talk to his watch, then opens them and says, "Nope, it says you haven't got any panties on."
"Well, it's wrong," says the girl, "I do have panties on."
"Damn," says the guy, slapping his watch, "it's an hour fast!"
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haha nice
man u are like a walkin talkin encyclopedia of jokes!!!!!!!!haha
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Another one-
Restroom Etiquette
During a good manners and etiquette class being held for young children, the teacher says to her students:
"If you were courting a well educated young girl from a prominent family and during a dinner for two you needed to go to the toilet, what would you say to her?"
Mike replies: "Wait a minute, I'm going for a piss."
The teacher says: "That would be very rude and improper on your part."
Charlie replies: "I'm sorry I need to go to the toilet, I'll be back in a minute."
The teacher says: "That's much better but to mention the word "toilet" during a meal, is unpleasant."
And Little Johnny says: "My dear, please excuse me for a moment. I have to go shake hands with a personal friend, whom, I hope to be able to introduce to you after dinner."
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loooooool it took me a while to understadn tht :P lol !
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Here's Another one for ya :P
TYPES OF GUYS IN THE MEN'S ROOM ::)
Being a man myself, I've learned in my 17 long years that there are many different types of restroom users. You've seen them, the guy entirely too busy to notice that he's taking a leak on himself or the guy that sticks half his body inside the wall urinal so nobody else can see him. Well, now you know what they're called.
* Absent Minded - Opens vest, pulls out tie, pisses in pants.
* Childish - Pisses directly in bottom of urinal, likes to see it bubble.
* Worried - Not sure of where he has been lately, makes quick inspection.
* Clever - No hands, fixes tie, looks around and usually pisses on floor.
* Conceited - Holds his two-inch pecker like a baseball bat.
* Crosseyed - Looks into next urinal to see how the other guy is fixed.
* Desperate - Waits in long line, teeth floating, pisses in pants.
* Disgruntled - Stands for a while, gives up, walks away.
* Drunk - Holds right thumb in left hand, pisses in pants.
* Efficient - Waits until he has to crap, then does both.
* Fat - Backs up and takes a blind shot at urinal, pisses in shoe.
* Excitable - Shorts half twisted around, cannot find hole, rips shorts.
* Frivolous - Plays stream up, down and across urinals, tries to hit fly or bug.
* Indifferent - All urinals being used, pisses in sink.
* Little - Stands on box, falls in, drowns.
* Patient - Stands very close for a long while waiting, reads with free hand.
* Radical - Ignores urinal. Pisses on wall.
* Sneak - Farts silently while pissing, acts very innocent, knows man in next stall will get blamed.
* Sociable - Joins friends in piss whether he has to or not.
* Timid - Can't piss if someone's watching, flushes urinal, comes back later.
* Tough - Bangs his "stuff" on side of urinal to dry it.
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oh my gosh Lord you're a laughter machine!!!!! ;D hahahaha
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thank u Q80BOY ;D
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lord kratos very well done ;D ;D ;D
Keep up da good work..
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thank u immortal ;D
but u r better than me ;)
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I'll contribute mor, after my exams r over..
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Don't u notice all the girls ran away from this topic xD ;D ;D
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yeah, I noticed that.... :P
Gotta stop posting dirty jokes :-\... Its earning me a bad reputation :(
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yeah, I noticed that.... :P
Gotta stop posting dirty jokes :-\... Its earning me a bad reputation :(
u better ur toilet joke was good but for ppl wid active imaginations (like me) it scarred me for life
lol
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sorry kim. :(
By the way,what do u mean by active imaginations? ::) :P
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lord please post a joke .. i need a laugh! :P
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Alright, Now I'm gonna post clean jokes only so those who ran away can come back now .::) :P
Farts defined :P
Art Fart
It's such a beauty you want to immortalize it on canvas.
Arrogant Fart
When you think your farts don't stink.
Assault Fart
A sudden attack that shoots virtual flames out your arse.
Tire Fart
You can't control the blow out.
Beer Fart
These come out of every 'can' and smell like warm beer.
Jail Fart
Been doing time inside you for quite awhile, and finally makes its great escape.
Donkey Fart
Your A** is the only one that can do it.
Ghost Fart
You can't hear it, you can't see it and you can't smell it either.
Home Alone Fart
When you're home alone and a great one is wasted on no one.
Shoe Fart
When you bend over to tie your shoe laces and one escapes.
Tank Fart
When you refer to your farts as 'gas'.
Old Fart
You know how old it is by how bad it smells.
Brain Fart
You need to fart, but nothing comes out.
Alzheimer Fart
A confused fart that heads the wrong way, and becomes a burp.
Not-Me Fart
When you drop a bomb in a crowded elevator, turn around to the person behind you and give a disgusted look and whisper "PIG!"
U.F.O. Fart
When someone farts in crowded room, label it as a "Unidentified Foul Odor".
Even if this joke is full of "farts", it is not a dirty joke :P
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haha funny
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hahaha lord .. please post more!! :P
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Chewing gum
A gum-chewing American and a Frenchman are sitting together in a restaurant. The American feel really proud to be an American, so he starts a conversation.
He asks the Frenchman, "When you eat bread, do you eat all of it?"
"Mais oui!, of course!" responds the Frenchman.
"Well," says the American, "we only eat the soft part of it. The rest we collect in containers, take to a factory and put through a mill. What comes out are little breads that we sell in France.
"And what about steaks?" he continues. "Do you eat all parts of them?"
"Bien sur! We do," replies the Frenchman.
"You don't say!" says the America, grinning. "We don't! We only eat the meaty part of the steak. The greasy part we collect in containers, take to a factory, put through a mill, and what comes out are little steaks that we
sell in France."
Now the Frenchman is really riled . So he asks, "And what do Americans do with their used condoms?"
"Hey, we throw them away of course," says the American.
"Ha!" exclaims the Frenchman. "We collect them in containers, take them to a factory and put them through a mill. What comes out is chewing gum that we sell in America!"
This joke is not dirty :P
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one more :P
Gay sons :P
Four men went golfing together one day; three headed to the first tee and one went into the club house to take care of the bill. The three men started talking, bragging about their sons. The first man told the others, "My son is a home builder and he's so successful that he gave a friend a new home - for free."
The second man said, "My son was a car salesman and now he owns a multi-line dealership. He''s so successful that he gave a friend two Cadillacs."
The third man, not wanting to be outdone bragged, "My son is a stock broker and he's doing so well that he gave his friend an entire stock portfolio."
The fourth man joined them on the tee after a few minutes of taking care of business. The first man mentioned, "We were just talking about our sons. How is yours doing?" The fourth man replied, "Well, my son is gay. I'm not totally thrilled about it, but he must be good. His last three boyfriends gave him a house, two cars, and a stock portfolio.
I am running out of jokes :P
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OMG I LVOE THIS TOPIC :D
Thanks Kratos :D
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u r welcome Baladya ;D
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i bet ladies might be having nighmare's reading the piss jokes :P :P LMAOOOOOOOOOO
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lol not this one
kratos i m suprised that u stopped???out of jokes???
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No offense to girls :P
And God Said “Let There Be Bridge”
A biker was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for Me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."
The biker thought about it for a long time Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand our wives. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?."
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No offense to girls :P
And God Said “Let There Be Bridge”
A biker was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for Me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."
The biker thought about it for a long time Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand our wives. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?."
LOOOOL!
I was just about to say "awww", until I got to the end ! LOL.
If anyone is difficult to understand it's the men. Women are just logical ::)
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haha nice
none taken
lol
u men just need to use a little bit of ur brains to understand us we leave all the signs u need
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thanks roxy and kim ;D By the way roxy nice to see u again ;). as for that question please wait until the exams r over.I'll send u a 3 pages long essay :P
Here's another one-
The Soldier and the Nun
December 26th, 2009
A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, ‘Please, may I hide under your skirt. I’ll explain later.’
The nun agreed.
A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, Sister, have you seen a soldier?’
The nun replied, ‘He went that way.’
After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said,
‘I can’t thank you enough Sister. You see, I don’t want to go to Iraq .’
The nun said, ‘I understand completely.’
The soldier added, ‘I hope I’m not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!’
The nun replied, ‘If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls….I don’t want to go to Iraq either.’
Now don't say its dirty :P
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No offense to girls :P
And God Said “Let There Be Bridge”
A biker was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for Me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."
The biker thought about it for a long time Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand our wives. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?."
haha nice one
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u men just need to use a little bit of ur brains to understand us we leave all the signs u need
What do u mean by signs? ::)
Do girls leave signs like .....
DANGER AHEAD!!!! or
Speed Zone Ahead!!! :P :P :P
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thanks roxy and kim ;D By the way roxy nice to see u again ;). as for that question please wait until the exams r over.I'll send u a 3 pages long essay :P
Here's another one-
The Soldier and the Nun
December 26th, 2009
A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, ‘Please, may I hide under your skirt. I’ll explain later.’
The nun agreed.
A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, Sister, have you seen a soldier?’
The nun replied, ‘He went that way.’
After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said,
‘I can’t thank you enough Sister. You see, I don’t want to go to Iraq .’
The nun said, ‘I understand completely.’
The soldier added, ‘I hope I’m not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!’
The nun replied, ‘If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls….I don’t want to go to Iraq either.’
Now don't say its dirty :P
hahahahahaha
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thanks roxy and kim ;D By the way roxy nice to see u again ;). as for that question please wait until the exams r over.I'll send u a 3 pages long essay :P
Here's another one-
The Soldier and the Nun
December 26th, 2009
A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, ‘Please, may I hide under your skirt. I’ll explain later.’
The nun agreed.
A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, Sister, have you seen a soldier?’
The nun replied, ‘He went that way.’
After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said,
‘I can’t thank you enough Sister. You see, I don’t want to go to Iraq .’
The nun said, ‘I understand completely.’
The soldier added, ‘I hope I’m not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!’
The nun replied, ‘If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls….I don’t want to go to Iraq either.’
Now don't say its dirty :P
i heard a similar one but in arabic , nice By the way ;)
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thanks ;D
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What do u mean by signs? ::)
Do girls leave signs like .....
DANGER AHEAD!!!! or
Speed Zone Ahead!!! :P :P :P
actually we ladies have diff personalities ,so a girl's behavior depends on what kind of personality she has.
for me ,everyone who knows me in real life , knows when iam sad , mad , happy, superactive ...etc cuz of my expressions so ya lol ::)
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duh! Even guys have that!!!!! ::)
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duh! Even guys have that!!!!! ::)
well i've been raised in a family full of girls , so i don't kno much abt boys :-X lol :D
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I have been raised in a family of girls... ::)
So I know girls very well!!! ::) :P
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I have been raised in a family of girls... ::)
So I know girls very well!!! ::) :P
ur soo like my lil bro lol ::)
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Like ur lil bro... :o
I'm not ur lil bro.... >:(
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Like ur lil bro... :o
I'm not ur lil bro.... >:(
i didn't mean it that way ...... what i meant is that my lil bro is like u , he has also been raised by a family full of girls ,don't get me wrong ;)
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No, I got u right. :)
I was just kidding!! :P
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No, I got u right. :)
I was just kidding!! :P
hehe ::)
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hehe too :P
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havent posted 4 soo long had 2 study accounting nd bio........By the way loved ur jokes lord kratos!!! :D
A man bought a new Mercedes to celebrate his wife leaving him and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive.
The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him.
"There's no way they can catch a Mercedes," he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100.....Then the reality of the situation hit him. "What am I doing?" he thought and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car.
"It's been a long hard day, this is the end of my shift and it's Friday the 13th. I don't feel like more paperwork, I don't need the frustration or the overtime, so if you can give me a really good excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before, you can go."
The guy thinks about it for a second and says, "Last week my nagging wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her back!"
"Have a nice weekend," said the officer.
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this joke is a bit sick but made me laff my a** off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:
"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"
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this joke is a bit sick but made me laff my a** off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:
"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"
hahahahhahahahahaha...lmao
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If only life could be like computers
If you messed up your life, you could press “Alt, Ctr, Delete” and start all over!
To get your daily exercise, just click on “run”!
If you needed a break from life, click on “suspend”.
Hit “any key” to continue life when ready.
To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster.
To “add/remove” someone in your life, click settings and control panel.
To improve your appearance, just adjust the display or contrast settings.
If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers.
When you lose your car keys, click on “find”.
“Help” with the chores is just a click away.
You wouldn’t need auto insurance. You’d use your backups to recover from a crash.
We could click on “send” and the kids would go to bed immediately.
To feel like a new person, click on “refresh”.
Click on “close” to shut up the kids and spouse.
To undo a mistake, click on “back”.
Is your wardrobe getting old? Click “update”.
You don’t like cleaning the litter box, click on “delete”!
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ooooooooh that would be a dream come true
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ooooooooh that would be a dream come true
That would be really nice....
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a blond went to a shop
she told the guy she wanted to buy that toaster he responded sorry i dont sell to blonds
she dyed her hair blue and went again
she told the guy she wanted to buy that toaster agian he said i dont sell to blonds
she dyed her hair red and went again
she told the guy she wanted to buy that toaster and agin he said i dont sell to blonds
she shaved her head and went again
the guy answered back in the same way again
she then finally asked him how did you know i am a blond i have no hair
because this is not a toaster its an oven
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a blond went to a shop
she told the guy she wanted to buy that toaster he responded sorry i dont sell to blonds
she dyed her hair blue and went again
she told the guy she wanted to buy that toaster agian he said i dont sell to blonds
she dyed her hair red and went again
she told the guy she wanted to buy that toaster and agin he said i dont sell to blonds
she shaved her head and went again
the guy answered back in the same way again
she then finally asked him how did you know i am a blond i have no hair
because this is not a toaster its an oven
better version..
is the microwave and the tv
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a blond went to a shop
she told the guy she wanted to buy that toaster he responded sorry i dont sell to blonds
she dyed her hair blue and went again
she told the guy she wanted to buy that toaster agian he said i dont sell to blonds
she dyed her hair red and went again
she told the guy she wanted to buy that toaster and agin he said i dont sell to blonds
she shaved her head and went again
the guy answered back in the same way again
she then finally asked him how did you know i am a blond i have no hair
because this is not a toaster its an oven
HAHHHAHAHHAHAH IDIOT!
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Hey u girls where talking about that's its easy to understand u, well thats not what my IGCSE literature book says:
He never learned her, quite. Year after year
That territory, without seasons, shifted
under his eye. An hour he could be lost
in the walled anger of her quarried hurt
on turning, see cool water laughing where
the day before there were stones in her voice.
He charted. She made wilderness again.
Roads disappeared. The map was never true.
Wind brough him rain sometimes, tasting of sea -
and suddenly she would change the shape of shores
faultlessly calm. All, all was each day new:
the shadows of her love shortened or grew
like trees seen from an unexpected hill,
new country at each jaunty helpless journey.
So he accepted that geography, constantly strange.
Wondered. Stayed home increasingly to find
his way among the landscapes of her mind.
Its a nice poem so i just wanted to share it :P I'm not really sure, but through the little times i've dealt with women, i can say that yes, its hard to understand them ;D
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Hey u girls where talking about that's its easy to understand u, well thats not what my IGCSE literature book says:
He never learned her, quite. Year after year
That territory, without seasons, shifted
under his eye. An hour he could be lost
in the walled anger of her quarried hurt
on turning, see cool water laughing where
the day before there were stones in her voice.
He charted. She made wilderness again.
Roads disappeared. The map was never true.
Wind brough him rain sometimes, tasting of sea -
and suddenly she would change the shape of shores
faultlessly calm. All, all was each day new:
the shadows of her love shortened or grew
like trees seen from an unexpected hill,
new country at each jaunty helpless journey.
So he accepted that geography, constantly strange.
Wondered. Stayed home increasingly to find
his way among the landscapes of her mind.
Its a nice poem so i just wanted to share it :P I'm not really sure, but through the little times i've dealt with women, i can say that yes, its hard to understand them ;D
u guys r hilarious :D :D :D
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An idiot ordered pizza from pizza hut in the shop
So the waiter asks him: do you want me to cut into 8 slices or 16 slices?
he says : no 16 is too much i cant eat all that. cut it into 8 slices please :)
2 idiots wanted to steal stuff in a building . So they decided that they will steal the building and run with it far away so they can rip the place out comfortably and take their time. So they went at night and removed their clothes and started pushing the building. A guy came from behind and stole their clothes. 5 mintus later one of the idiots looks back and doesnt find his clothes and he says : man we went too far i think this is enough!
A guy travelled abroad and as soon as he reached the airport he got a message : COME BACK HOME RIGHT NOW AS SOON AS YOU CAN . THIS IS AN EMERGENCY . So he took the first plane home and he met his brother at the airport he looked like a disaster and was extremely sad and had very very very long beard ( goatie ) .So the guy asks his brother?? whats wrong !! did something happened to my dad??? So brother doesnt asnwer adn takes hiim to the car ad there he meets his other brother and he too looks like a disaster and has long beat and goati. So the guy asks his brother whats wrong !! did somethin happen to my dad?? Brother doesnt asnwer and when they rached home he met his other brother !! he too look like a disaster and has long beard ( goatie ) and he asks him whats wrong ?? did osmethin happen to my dad??? So he takes him to the room and finds his dad on the bed sleeping and he too looks like a disaster and has very very very long beard !! So he wakes him up and ANSWER ME DAD WHATS WRONG? ARE U DYING??
HIS DAD SAYS : hey did you take the shaving machine with you ??
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HAHAHAHAHAHA @the last 1 :D :D :D
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HAHAHAHAHAHA @the last 1 :D :D :D
ya.. really nice ..
and dodi12, i am really sorry if i have offended you in earlier jokes..really sorry. I said a joke about womens. :-X :-[
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post some jokes guys, I'm bored :(
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again another blong joke
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.
"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."
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Alright, since nobody's posting.... here's one :P
Five dollars gas :P
I went into the Shell gas station this morning and asked for five dollars worth of gas. The clerk farted and gave me a receipt.
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A blonde keeps walking down her drive to her mail box.
She keeps doing this until her neighbour asks her why she is doing that.
The blonde replies "My computer keeps telling me that i've got mail".
blond jokes r da best!!
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Did you hear about the blonde that...
Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope.
Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said "2 to 4 years"
Couldn't call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button.
When asked what the capital of California was; answered "C".
Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125.
After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained that the other swimmers were using their arms.
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post some jokes guys, I'm bored :(
okie...
Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years.
The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board looking over an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.
The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.
Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.
The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump. "Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor.
To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can't swim!"
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another :P
What’s the only animal with an a**hole in the middle of its back?
A police horse.
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loll guys :D
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Did you hear about the blonde that...
Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope.
Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said "2 to 4 years"
Couldn't call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button.
When asked what the capital of California was; answered "C".
Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125.
After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained that the other swimmers were using their arms.
ha haaa haaa...... :D
hilarious.... ;D
especially the last one. :P
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okie...
Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years.
The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board looking over an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.
The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.
Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.
The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump. "Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor.
To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can't swim!"
haaa haaaaaa haaaaaaa :P
nice one ksitna ;)
thank u guys!! ;D
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Another one :P
whatcha doin?
eating chocolate
where'd you get it?
the doggy dropped it..
where's the doggy?
behind the door :)
whats he doin?
makin more!
BILLY PUT THAT DOWN!!!!!!
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another 8)
A hot young woman walks into a bar in her apartment complex.
She goes over to the bar table, and the bartender comes over to see her. May I help you, he says. Yes, actually.
The bartender is a tall man with a long, full beard. Have you seen the landlord recently,? She says. As she asks him, she reaches up and begins to stroke and carress his beard.
The man is shy and very nervous to be having a girl touching him. No, he says very shyly. Oh, well, if you do see him, I’d like you to tell him something for me.
She continued to carress his beard. What’s that, he asks, still very nervous. She comes up very close to his face and says, tell him……….there's no toilet paper in the woman bathroom.
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New Lawyer
Joe grew up in a small town, then moved away to attend college and law school. He decided to come back to the small town because he could be a big man in this small town. He really wanted to impress everyone. He opened his new law office, but business was very slow at first. One day, he saw a man coming up the sidewalk. He decided to make a big impression on this new client when he arrived.
As the man came to the door, Joe picked up the phone. He motioned the man in, all the while talking..
"No. Absolutely not. You tell those clowns in New York that I won't settle this case for less than one million.."
"Yes. The Appeals Court has agreed to hear that case next week. I'll be handling the primary argument and the other members of my team will provide support.."
"Okay. Tell the DA that I'll meet with him next week to discuss the details.."
This sort of thing went on for almost 5 minutes. All the while the man sat patiently as Joe rattled instructions. Finally, Joe put down the phone and turned to the man. "I'm sorry for the delay, but as you can see, I'm very busy.
What can I do for you?"
The man replied "I'm from the phone company..I came to hook up your phone."
lawyer jokes this time
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3 men where at the FBI Building for a job interview.
The first man walked into the office . The interviewing FBI agent said "To be in
the FBI you must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the
next room. I want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took
the gun, hesitated, and said "Sorry, I can't do it."
The next interviewee came into the office. The Agent said "To be in the FBI you
must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the next room.I
want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took the gun,
walked into the room, then walked out. "Sorry," he said.
The last man came into the office. The inverviewer said "To be in the FBI you
must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the next room. I
want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took the gun and
went into the room. The Agent heard 6 shots, silence, then a lot of screaming.
The man came out of the room and said "Someone loaded the gun with blanks, so I
beat her to death with the curtain railing!"
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3 men where at the FBI Building for a job interview.
The first man walked into the office . The interviewing FBI agent said "To be in
the FBI you must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the
next room. I want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took
the gun, hesitated, and said "Sorry, I can't do it."
The next interviewee came into the office. The Agent said "To be in the FBI you
must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the next room.I
want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took the gun,
walked into the room, then walked out. "Sorry," he said.
The last man came into the office. The inverviewer said "To be in the FBI you
must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the next room. I
want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took the gun and
went into the room. The Agent heard 6 shots, silence, then a lot of screaming.
The man came out of the room and said "Someone loaded the gun with blanks, so I
beat her to death with the curtain railing!"
hahaha laughed to death lol still laughing
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3 men where at the FBI Building for a job interview.
The first man walked into the office . The interviewing FBI agent said "To be in
the FBI you must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the
next room. I want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took
the gun, hesitated, and said "Sorry, I can't do it."
The next interviewee came into the office. The Agent said "To be in the FBI you
must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the next room.I
want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took the gun,
walked into the room, then walked out. "Sorry," he said.
The last man came into the office. The inverviewer said "To be in the FBI you
must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the next room. I
want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took the gun and
went into the room. The Agent heard 6 shots, silence, then a lot of screaming.
The man came out of the room and said "Someone loaded the gun with blanks, so I
beat her to death with the curtain railing!"
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Yo mamma's so poor, she can't afford to go on welfare.
Yo mamma's so poor, she got thrown out of a homeless shelter.
Yo mamma's so poor, she tried to use food stamps on a gumball machine.
Yo mamma's so poor, a burgler broke into her house and left her some money.
now ur mamma jokes turn (not offending any1 mom here) :D
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2 men were walking through the desert, one carrying a telephone box, the other carrying a lamp post.
The man with the lamp post asks the other man “why are you carrying a phone box?”. “well” he says “when the lions come i can hide in it and i’ll be safe. Why are you carrying a lamp post?”.
“Well” replies the first man “when the lions come i can drop it and i’ll be able to run faster”.
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A woman announces to her friend that she is getting married for the fourth time.
“How wonderful! But I hope you don’t mind me asking what happened to your first husband?”
“He ate poisonous mushrooms and died.”
“Oh, how tragic! What about your second husband?”
“He ate poisonous mushrooms too and died.”
“Oh, how terrible! I’m almost afraid to ask you about your third husband.”
“He died of a broken neck.”
“A broken neck?”
“He wouldn’t eat the mushrooms.”
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3 men where at the FBI Building for a job interview.
The first man walked into the office . The interviewing FBI agent said "To be in
the FBI you must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the
next room. I want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took
the gun, hesitated, and said "Sorry, I can't do it."
The next interviewee came into the office. The Agent said "To be in the FBI you
must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the next room.I
want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took the gun,
walked into the room, then walked out. "Sorry," he said.
The last man came into the office. The inverviewer said "To be in the FBI you
must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the next room. I
want you to go in there and shoot her with this gun." The man took the gun and
went into the room. The Agent heard 6 shots, silence, then a lot of screaming.
The man came out of the room and said "Someone loaded the gun with blanks, so I
beat her to death with the curtain railing!"
lmao, ha haaaa ;D
immortal, nice to see u kickin ;D
@theone - nice jokes ;D
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A man is in a desert, dehydrated and almost dried up, when he sees a stable up ahead.
He crawls over to it and knocks on the door. A man comes out, sees the poor man and nurses him back to health. When the man is better the nice man loads up a horse with food and water and put the man on it.
“Now, this horse is special.” he says. “To make him go, you say ‘thank god’ to make him stop, you say halleljuah.
The man thanks him and leaves, while yelling thank god. After an hour of riding, he starts to see a cliff ledge ahead. thank god! he says.
He forgets how you make the horse stop. thank god! thank god! he says but the horse keeps gaining speed.Then, a few feet from the edge, he remembers. HALLELJUAH! he screams, as the horse screeches to a halt, inches away from the cliif edge. “thank god” he says
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Another....
A man is speeding and is pulled over by a cop
cop says: sir im gona havta give you a ticket for speeding.
man starts singing “21 today 21 today hey hoe meeadio 21 today!
cop says: oh sir its your birthday ok ill let you off this once just dont let it happen again.
man drives off and knocks down an old woman and starts to sing…. 22 today 22 today…….
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Two fish are in a tank. one turns to the other and says,
"You drive, I'll fire"
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I was in a taxi and the driver was whistling and he had a grin on his face.
” I love this job ! I’m my own boss and I never get told what to do”
I replied :
“left here ! “
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Another one! It’s pretty rude, though… ::)
A psychiatrist called three women in for a test with their children. After long hours of testing, he found a serious obsession in all of the mothers.
He told the first, “you have a severe obsession with food. You called your daughter Candy!”
He told the second, “you are freakishly obsessed with money; you named your daughter Penny!”
Before the third mother could be told what her obsession was, she lead her son out of the office saying, “We don’t need to hear this, d*ck.”
Sorry, I hope its not too dirty.... I was running out of jokes :P
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Another :P
An elderly couple goes to Burger King and share their fries and burger. A trucker sitting next to them offers to pay for the old lady. "It's all right," says the old man husband. "We always share everything." On seeing that the old lady has not eaten anything anything, the trucker once again makes an offer. The old man once again assures the trucker to stay calm and resumes eating. Finally, the trucker asks the lady about why she is not eating. The old lady replies, " I am waiting for the teeth".
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A man is in a desert, dehydrated and almost dried up, when he sees a stable up ahead.
He crawls over to it and knocks on the door. A man comes out, sees the poor man and nurses him back to health. When the man is better the nice man loads up a horse with food and water and put the man on it.
“Now, this horse is special.” he says. “To make him go, you say ‘thank god’ to make him stop, you say halleljuah.
The man thanks him and leaves, while yelling thank god. After an hour of riding, he starts to see a cliff ledge ahead. thank god! he says.
He forgets how you make the horse stop. thank god! thank god! he says but the horse keeps gaining speed.Then, a few feet from the edge, he remembers. HALLELJUAH! he screams, as the horse screeches to a halt, inches away from the cliif edge. “thank god” he says
ha ha cute
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Another one! It’s pretty rude, though… ::)
A psychiatrist called three women in for a test with their children. After long hours of testing, he found a serious obsession in all of the mothers.
He told the first, “you have a severe obsession with food. You called your daughter Candy!”
He told the second, “you are freakishly obsessed with money; you named your daughter Penny!”
Before the third mother could be told what her obsession was, she lead her son out of the office saying, “We don’t need to hear this, d*ck.”
Sorry, I hope its not too dirty.... I was running out of jokes :P
not that dirty but very funny
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Another ha haa
Brad, a local beachgoer, couldn't even get a second look from any of the girls on the beach. So he headed over to the lifeguard tower to see if the lifeguard had any advice for him.
"Dude, it's obvious," said the lifeguard. "You're wearing those gnarly old swimming trunks that make you look like an old geezer. They're years outta style. Your best bet is to get yourself a Speedo—say, two sizes too small—and drop a potato inside it. You'll have all the babes you can handle."
The following weekend, Brad hits the beach with his brand-spanking-new tight Speedo and his potato, and it's not long before he approaches the lifeguard tower once more.
"For cryin' out loud," said Brad, "it's worse than before! Everyone on the beach acts disgusted as I walk by—covering their faces, turning away, laughing! What's wrong now?"
"Jeez, Brad!" said the lifeguard, "The potato goes in front!"
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looooooooooooooorrrrrrrrdddddddddddddddddd kratooooooooz <3
ur the man !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love ur jokes !!!!!!!!!!
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Thank u, kimo jesus ;D
Here's another one for ya ;)
A policeman is doing his usual rounds just before midnight when he passes a parking lot and notices a couple inside a parked car. He stops to investigate and sees a man in the driver's seat and a young lady sitting in the backseat, quietly reading a magazine.
The officer knocks on the driver's window and asks what's going on.
"Listening to music," the guy says. ??Pointing toward the young lady in the backseat, the officer asks, "And what's she doing?"
"Reading a magazine, of course."
"How old are you?" asks the officer.
"I'm 23." ??"And how old is she?"
The guy looks at his watch and says, "Well, in 11 minutes she'll be 18."
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here's another ;)
but its a little dirty :P
A small zoo in Alabama acquires a rare gorilla, who quickly becomes agitated. The zookeeper determines that the female ape is in heat, but there are no male apes available for mating.
The zookeeper approaches a redneck janitor with a proposition. "Would you be willing to have sex with this gorilla for $500?" he asks.
The janitor accepts the offer, but only on three conditions: "First, I don't want to have to kiss her. And second, you can never tell anyone about this." The zookeeper agrees to the conditions and asks about the third.
"Well," says the janitor, "I'm gonna need about a week to come up with the $500."
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another....
Man, I can't stop posting them...
Everybody on Earth dies and goes to heaven. God greets them and says, "Men, make two lines: one for those who dominated their women and one for those who were whipped. All the women can go with St. Peter."
After about an hour, God returns to find 2.5 billion men standing in the whipped line and only one guy in the dominant line.
"You men should be ashamed of yourselves!" God cries. "I created you in my image, and all of you cowed down to women? Can any of you explain this?" No one dares says a word.
God then turns to the man standing alone and says, "Tell me, my son, how did you manage to be the only one on this line?"
"I don't know," the guy replies, shrugging. "My wife told me to stand here."
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Holy sh*t!!!! :o
I posted 16 jokes just now...
It's a joke right? ;)
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loooooool :P my wife told me to stand there hahahaha :P
i kno SF IS ADDICITVE :p and its nice to make ppl laugh :P
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yeah, I guess so ;D
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lord kratooooos
as usual ur the joke master!!!!
here read this:
Teacher: If you multiplied 50 by 8 and then divided by 4, what would you get?
Student: The wrong answer.
A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him.
She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said,”I hope I haven’t made you feel ill at ease, it’s just that you look so much like my late son.”
He answered, “That’s okay.”
“I know it’s silly, but if you’d call out “Good bye, Mom” as I leave the store, it would make me feel so happy.”
She then went through the checkout, and as she was on her way out of the store, the man called out, “Goodbye, Mom.”
The little old lady waved, and smiled back at him.
Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine into someone’s day, he went to pay for his groceries.
“That comes to $121.85,” said the clerk.
“How come so much? I only bought 5 items!”
The clerk replied, “Yeah, but your Mother said you’d be paying for her things, too.”
loool @hilariouuuus :D :D
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hahahaha...very nice jokes... ;D :D
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lord kratooooos
as usual ur the joke master!!!!
here read this:
Teacher: If you multiplied 50 by 8 and then divided by 4, what would you get?
Student: The wrong answer.
A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him.
She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said,”I hope I haven’t made you feel ill at ease, it’s just that you look so much like my late son.”
He answered, “That’s okay.”
“I know it’s silly, but if you’d call out “Good bye, Mom” as I leave the store, it would make me feel so happy.”
She then went through the checkout, and as she was on her way out of the store, the man called out, “Goodbye, Mom.”
The little old lady waved, and smiled back at him.
Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine into someone’s day, he went to pay for his groceries.
“That comes to $121.85,” said the clerk.
“How come so much? I only bought 5 items!”
The clerk replied, “Yeah, but your Mother said you’d be paying for her things, too.”
loool @hilariouuuus :D :D
oh!... smart lady.!
has anyone tried this in REAL life?
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fuy these jokes willmake u laugh till death :P
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nahh!! im too young for ny1 2 beleive me!!!
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Here's another one :P
GENDER DIFFERENCES
Little Johnny comes home from school with a note from his teacher, indicating that "Johnny seems to be having some difficulty with the differences between boys and girls," and would his mother "...please sit down and have a talk with Johnny about this."
So, Johnny’s mother takes him quietly by the hand upstairs to her bedroom, and closes the door. "First Johnny, I want you to take off my blouse..." So he unbuttons her blouse and takes it off.
"OK, now take off my skirt..." And he takes off her skirt.
"Now, take off my bra..." Which he does.
"And now, Johnny, please take off my panties..."
And when Johnny finishes removing these, she says, "Johnny, PLEASE don’t wear any of my clothes to school any more!
What were you thinking?
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Here's another one :P
GENDER DIFFERENCES
Ohhhhh myyyy gosshh..LOOOOL. I was like =O =O =O while reading it until the end. ::) ::) :P
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What?
Is everyone out cold? ::)
Alright, then I will post ;)
A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a rolled-up magazine.
"What the hell was that for?" he asked.
"That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Mary Lou written on it," she replied.
"But you don't understand," he pleaded. "Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Mary Lou was the name of one of the horses I bet on."
"Oh honey, I'm sorry," she said. "I should have known there was a good explanation."
Three days later he was watching a ball game on TV when she walked up and hit him in the head again, this time with the iron skillet, which knocked him out cold. When he came to, he asked, "What was that for?" he pleaded.
"Your horse just called!"
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Another, but it's a li'l dirty :P
A man walks into a bar and sees a miniature man sitting on a table playing a miniature piano.
He's fascinated and watches the man play for a few minutes, then asks the bartender, "How did you find such a tiny man to play the piano?"
The bartender replies, "I found a lamp with a genie in it who granted me one wish."
"And you asked for a 10-inch pianist?"
"Well, not exactly."
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Uhhhm ::)
In a city park stood two beautiful statues, one female and the other male. These two statues faced each other for many, many years. Early one morning an angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you your greatest wish. I hereby give you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire." And with that command, the statues came to life.
The two statues smiled at each other, ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping.
After 15 minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling. Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, "You still have 15 minutes. Would you like to continue?"
The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?"
Smiling, the female statue said, "Sure. But this time you hold down the pigeon and I'll crap on its head!"
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A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away.
The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150."
The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.
The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?"
The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead." Shaking his head, he continued, "I just can't take that chance."
I was bored... :P
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A woman preparing to leave her husband casually informs him, "I'm going to become a hooker. I can make $400 for what I give you for free."
"I'm coming with you," the man replies. "I want to see how you will live on $800 a year."
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What am I gonna do? :( Yeah tell a joke :P
A drunk in a bar barfs all over his shirt. "Damn," he says. "I puked on my shirt again. If the wife finds out, she's gonna kill me."
"Not to worry," says the bartender as he sticks a $20 bill in the drunk's pocket. "Just tell her someone puked on you and gave you some cash to cover the cleaning bill."
So the drunk goes home and tells his wife about the guy who puked on him. She reaches into his pocket and finds two twenties. "Why are there two twenties?" she asks.
The drunk replies, "Ummm, yeah... he crapped in my pants, too."
EDIT-> I forgot... This is my 300th post!!!! ;D THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!! 300!!!! 8) ;D
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here are some egyptian jokes :P ( took them off google )
A Japanese tourist hailed a taxi in downtown Cairo and asked to be taken to the Airport.
On the way, a car zoomed by and the tourist responded, "Ohhh! TOYOTA!! Made in Japan!! Very fast!"
Not too long afterward, another car flew by the taxi.
"Ohh! NISSAN!! Made in Japan!! Very fast!"
Yet another car zipped by, and the tourist said, "Ohh! Mitsubishi!! Made in Japan!! Very fast!"
The taxi driver was starting to get a little miffed that the Japanese made cars were passing his Fiat, when yet another car passed the taxi as they were turning into the airport.
"Ohh! Honda!! Made in Japan!! Very fast!"
The taxi driver stopped the car, pointed to the meter, and said, "That'll be LE 250."
"LE 250? It was so short a ride! Why so much?"
"Taxi meter. Made in Egypt. Very fast."
Another one:
There was a tour bus in Egypt that stopped in the middle of a town square. The tourists are all shopping at the little stands surrounding the square.
One tourist looks at his watch, but it is broken, so he leans over to a local who is squatted down next to his cow.
"What time is it, sir?"
The local reaches out and softly cups the cow's udder in his hand, and raises it up and down.
"It's about 2:00", he says.
The tourist can't believe what he just saw. He runs back to the bus, and sure enough, it is 2:00. He tells a few of the fellow tourists his story, "The man can tell the time by the weight of his cow`s udder!"
One of the doubting tourists walks back to the local and asks him the time, the same thing happens! It is 2:05.p.m. He runs back to tell the story.
Finally, the bus driver wants to know how it is done. He walks over and asks the local how he knows the time from the cow`s udder.
The local says "Sit down here and grab the cow`s udder."
"Now, lift it up in the air. Now, look underneath it to the other side of the courtyard, where that clock is hanging on the wall."
More:
In Cairo a florist goes to the barber for a haircut and when he goes to pay, the barber says `
'I can't accept any money, I am doing a community service.
The florist is happy and leaves the shop. The next morning when the Barber goes
to open his shop, there is a Thank you Card and a dozen roses waiting at his door.
A baker goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber and the barber replies:
'I am Sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I am doing a Community Service'.
The baker is happy and leaves the shop. The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop,
there is a Thank you Card and a carton of Baklava waiting at his door.
A Saidi farmer (man from Upper Egypt) goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the Barber and the barber replies:
'I am Sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I am doing a Community Service'.
The Saidi guy of course is very happy and leaves the shop.
The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, he finds a dozen Saidis waiting for a haircut .
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The Vicar is Buying a ParrotVicar Buys Parrot - Short Joke
'Now, you're sure it doesn't scream, yell, or swear?' he inquired.
'Oh absolutely. It's a religious parrot,' the storekeeper assures him. 'Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the Lord's Prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm.'
'Brilliant. Wonderful!' grins the Vicar, 'but what happens if I pull both strings?'
'I fall off my perch, you twit!' screeches the parrot.
Customer Bowled Over by Service
A car mechanic received a repair order that said to check for a clanking noise when going around corners so he took the car out for a test drive and made a right turn, then a left turn, each time hearing a loud clunk.
When he arrived back at the garage he returned the car to the service manager with this note: 'Removed bowling ball from trunk.'
The T.V. is No Joke
I got in a fight with my wife last night and it was totally my fault.
She asked me what was on the TV and I said: dust.
Didn't go too well after that.
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Here's another one :P
GENDER DIFFERENCES
Little Johnny comes home from school with a note from his teacher, indicating that "Johnny seems to be having some difficulty with the differences between boys and girls," and would his mother "...please sit down and have a talk with Johnny about this."
So, Johnny’s mother takes him quietly by the hand upstairs to her bedroom, and closes the door. "First Johnny, I want you to take off my blouse..." So he unbuttons her blouse and takes it off.
"OK, now take off my skirt..." And he takes off her skirt.
"Now, take off my bra..." Which he does.
"And now, Johnny, please take off my panties..."
And when Johnny finishes removing these, she says, "Johnny, PLEASE don’t wear any of my clothes to school any more!
What were you thinking?
haha lol i dont think i was thinkin rite
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Here's another one :P
GENDER DIFFERENCES
Little Johnny comes home from school with a note from his teacher, indicating that "Johnny seems to be having some difficulty with the differences between boys and girls," and would his mother "...please sit down and have a talk with Johnny about this."
So, Johnny’s mother takes him quietly by the hand upstairs to her bedroom, and closes the door. "First Johnny, I want you to take off my blouse..." So he unbuttons her blouse and takes it off.
"OK, now take off my skirt..." And he takes off her skirt.
"Now, take off my bra..." Which he does.
"And now, Johnny, please take off my panties..."
And when Johnny finishes removing these, she says, "Johnny, PLEASE don’t wear any of my clothes to school any more!
What were you thinking?
hahaha lol....cool mom :P
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Once a man goes to the zoo, he sees that all the animals in the zoo were laughing only the a donkey does not laugh.
So on the other day when he again comes to the zoo, he says that the donkey was laughing and all the other animals were not, and when he asked one of the animals he replied that we were telling a joke, and he understood the joke today.
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The student - "how many children do you have , Madam?"
The teacher - "I have two daughters both are girls."
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Two men are sitting drinking at a bar at the top of the Empire State Building when the first man turns to the other and says, "You know, last week I discovered that if you jump from the top of this building, by the time you fall to the 10th floor, the winds around the building are so intense that they carry you around the building and back into the window."
The bartender just shakes his head in disapproval while wiping the bar.
The second guy says, "What are you a nut? There is no way that could happen."
"No, it's true," said the first man, let me prove it to you." He gets up from the bar,
jumps over the balcony, and plummets to the street below. When he passes the 10th floor,
the high wind whips him around the building and back into the 10th floor window and
he takes the elevator back up to the bar.
He met the second man, who looked quite astonished. "You know, I saw that with my own eyes, but that must have been a one time fluke."
"No, I'll prove it again," says the first man as he jumps. Again just as he is hurling toward the street, the 10th floor wind gently carries him around the building and into the window.
Once upstairs he urges his fellow drinker to try it. "Well, what the hey," the second guy says, "it works, I'll try it!" He jumps over the balcony plunges downward, passes the 11th, 10th, 9th, 8th floors ...and hits the sidewalk with a 'splat.' Back upstairs the Bartender turns to the other drinker, saying "You know, Superman, sometimes you can be a real jerk."
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A dog, a cat, and a penis are sitting around a camp fire one night. The dog says, "My life sucks, my master makes me do my business on a fire hydrent!". The cat says, "I don't think so, my master makes me do my business in a box of cat litter." The penis outraged, says "At least your master doesn't put a bag over your head and make you do push ups until you throw up!"
::) ;)
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here is another....
There was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant.
So, he went to the doctor to have a sperm count done.
The doctor told him to take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back the next day.
The elderly man came back the next day and the specimen cup was empty and the lid was on it. Doctor: What was the problem?
Elderly man: Well, I tried with my right hand...nothing. So, I tried with my left hand...nothing. My wife tried with her right hand...nothing. Her left hand...nothing. Her mouth...nothing. Then my wife's friend tried. Right hand, left hand, mouth....still nothing.
Doctor: Wait a minute. You mean your wife's friend too?!
Elderly man: Yeah, and we still couldn't get the lid off of the specimen cup.
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The student - "how many children do you have , Madam?"
The teacher - "I have two daughters both are girls."
Today i fell of da road & i started bleeding blood...LOL :D
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Today i fell of da road & i started bleeding blood...LOL :D
you started bleeding blood! :o
You mean that red fluid?! oh!... :P :P
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you started bleeding blood! :o
You mean that red fluid?! oh!... :P :P
Ya ,da 1 wit mint flavor :P
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Mint flavor huh? :(
But I like blood which tastes like chocolate!!! :P
Vampires............................
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Funny marriage/ love quotes :P
# "It's better to have loved and lost than to do forty pounds of laundry a week"
# "Women are cursed, and men are the proof."
# "Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house."
# "The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead."
# "I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste."
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This thread has been empty almost for a day or two. So I'll post some :P
Sunday School Lesson
Little Janice was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me Janice, who created the universe?" When Janice didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.
"God Almighty!" shouted Janice and the teacher said, "Very good" and Janice fell back asleep.
A while later the teacher asked Janice, "Who is our Lord and Saviour." But, Janice didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.
"Jesus Christ!" shouted Janice and the teacher said, "Very good," and Janice fell back asleep.
Then the teacher asked Janice a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" and again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin.
This time Janice jumped up and shouted, "If you stick me with that thing one more time, I'll break it in half and stick it up your A**!"
... the teacher fainted!
This joke is not dirty!!! :P
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Why I Fired My Secretary
This is a true story. Last week was my 40th birthday and I really didn't feel like waking up that morning. I managed to pull myself together and go downstairs for breakfast, hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday." I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids... They will remember.
My kids came trampling down the stairs to breakfast, ate their breakfast, and didn't say a word to me. So when I made it out of the house and started for work, I felt pretty dumpy and despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Joanne said, "Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday!" It felt a bit better knowing that at least someone remembered. I worked in a zombie like fashion until about one o'clock, when Joanne knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your Birthday, why don't we go out for lunch, just you and me." I said, "Thanks, Joanne, that's the best thing I've heard all day. Let's go!"
We went to lunch but not where we'd normally go. Instead she took me to a quiet bistro with a private table. We had a couple of mixed drinks and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Joanne said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day... We don't have to go right back to the office, do we?" I replied with "I suppose not. What do you have in mind?" She said, "Let's go to my apartment, it's just around the corner."
After arriving at her apartment, Joanne turned to me and said, "Boss if you don't mind, I'm goinna to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back." "Ok." I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake...
Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends, and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday".
And I just sat there...
On the couch...
Naked.
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Alright , another on the way :P
20 Fun Things To Do On An Elevator While Bored :P
Next time you're on an elevator and feel alittle bored, liven up the moment with some of these insightful ideas. Guaranteed to make heads turn or your money back.
1. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
2. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3. Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on.
4. Swat at flies that don't exist.
5. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"
6. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
7. Lay down a Twister mat and ask people if they'd like to play.
8. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they hear something ticking.
9. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
10. Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
11. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
12. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, and then announce, "I have new socks on."
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is my personal space!"
14. Fart loudly then exclaim "Was that you. There's no way I could do that one because unfortately mine don't come out loud."
15. Before the elevator door opens shout "DING" and then laugh and say "beat you again Mr Elevator."
16. Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
17. Hire a labrador, wear sunglasses and repeatedly walk into the walls whilst pretending to not hear the other passenger's direction.
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "that's mine!"
19. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
20. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
:P How do u like that? ;)
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I'm sick......... I need a surgery I guess ::)
Things you DON'T want to hear during a surgery
Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop.
"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"
Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!
Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
Hand me that....uh....that uh....thingie.
Oh no! I just lost my Rolex.
Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
Darn, there go the lights again...
Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Heck, the guy's got two of 'em.
Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
Could you stop that thing from beating? It's throwing my concentration off..
What's this doing here?
I hate it when they're missing stuff in here..
That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!
I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
Well folks, this will be an experiment for us all.
Sterile, shcmerile. The floor's clean, right?
Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
And now we remove the subject's brain and place it in the body of the ape. OK, now take a picture from this angle.
This is truly a freak of nature.
This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
Nurse, this patient signed the organ donation card,right ?
Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
What do you mean "You want a divorce"!
She's gonna blow! Everybody take cover!!!
FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out now!!
Darn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
and the number one thing I don't want the doctor to say during my surgery
Oops!!!!
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Alright , another on the way :P
20 Fun Things To Do On An Elevator While Bored :P
Next time you're on an elevator and feel alittle bored, liven up the moment with some of these insightful ideas. Guaranteed to make heads turn or your money back.
1. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
2. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3. Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on.
4. Swat at flies that don't exist.
5. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"
6. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
7. Lay down a Twister mat and ask people if they'd like to play.
8. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they hear something ticking.
9. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
10. Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
11. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
12. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, and then announce, "I have new socks on."
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is my personal space!"
14. Fart loudly then exclaim "Was that you. There's no way I could do that one because unfortately mine don't come out loud."
15. Before the elevator door opens shout "DING" and then laugh and say "beat you again Mr Elevator."
16. Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
17. Hire a labrador, wear sunglasses and repeatedly walk into the walls whilst pretending to not hear the other passenger's direction.
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "that's mine!"
19. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
20. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
:P How do u like that? ;)
Silly. ::) :P
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thank u :D
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thank u :D
Well, I was saying about the joke but not you but since you know you are then welcome. :P
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Here are my personal favs!!! ;)
WIFE JOKES!!!! :P
"I haven't seen you around here." "Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife." "So you're single?"
I've been married for 49 years. (or it seems like 49 years....) Where have I failed?
I've been in love with the same woman for many years. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me!
My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food... She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won't be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" She said, "Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
My wife will buy anything marked down. Last year she bought an escalator.
All my wife does is shop - once she was sick for a week, and three stores went under.
She has an electric blender, electric toaster, electric bread maker. Then she said "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!" So what did I do? Bought her an electric chair.
My wife loves to shop at Bloomingdale's. I bring her mail there twice a week.
My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night. Only this time, "I" stayed in the bathroom and cried.
My wife drives the wrong way on a one way street. The cop pulled her over and asked, "Where are you going?" My wife said, "I must be late, everyone is all coming back!"
My wife told me the car wasn't running well, there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was, and she told me it was in the lake.
My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.
My wife is on a new diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost weight, but can she climb a tree!
She was at the beauty shop for two hours. That was only for the estimate.
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in!"
I bought my wife a little Italian car. A Mafia. It has a hood under the hood.
Three weeks ago, she learned how to drive. Last week she learned how to aim it.
I came home, the car was in the dining room. "How did you get the car in here?" "Easy, I took a left at the kitchen."
While driving the car on a cross country trip I decided to lose 120 pounds of ugly fat... I left my wife at a rest stop...
My ex-con friend recently explained to me why he refuses to ever get married. He says "the wedding rings look too much like minature handcuffs....."
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lol.......the elevator one was HILARIOUS!!
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I'm sick......... I need a surgery I guess ::)
Things you DON'T want to hear during a surgery
Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop.
"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"
Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!
Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
Hand me that....uh....that uh....thingie.
Oh no! I just lost my Rolex.
Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
Darn, there go the lights again...
Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Heck, the guy's got two of 'em.
Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
Could you stop that thing from beating? It's throwing my concentration off..
What's this doing here?
I hate it when they're missing stuff in here..
That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!
I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
Well folks, this will be an experiment for us all.
Sterile, shcmerile. The floor's clean, right?
Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
And now we remove the subject's brain and place it in the body of the ape. OK, now take a picture from this angle.
This is truly a freak of nature.
This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
Nurse, this patient signed the organ donation card,right ?
Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
What do you mean "You want a divorce"!
She's gonna blow! Everybody take cover!!!
FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out now!!
Darn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
and the number one thing I don't want the doctor to say during my surgery
Oops!!!!
Dat word is fine by me..
But i wud not want him 2 say "Operation successful but patient DEAD..."
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Life Vs Donkey, Dog & Monkey
God created the donkey
and said to him.
"You will be a donkey. You will work un-tiringly from sunrise to sunset
carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass,
you will have no intelligence and you will live 50 years."
The donkey answered:
"I will be a donkey, but to live 50years is much. Give me only 20years"
God granted his wish.
-------------------------------------------
God created the dog
and said to him:
"You will guard the house of man. You will be his best Friend.
You will eat the scraps that he gives you and
you will live 30years.
You will be a dog. "
The dog answered:
"Sir, to live 30years is too much,give me only15 years.
" God granted his wish.
-------------------------------------------
God created the monkey
and said to him:
"You will be a monkey. You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks.
You will be amusing and you will live
20 years. "
The monkey answered:
"To live 20years is too much, give me only 10years."
God granted his wish.
-------------------------------------------
Finally God created man...
and said to him:
"You will be man, the only rational creature on the face of the earth.
You will use your intelligence to become master over all the animals.
You will dominate the world and you will live 20years."
Man responded:
"Sir, I will be a man but to live only
20 years is very little,
give me the 30years that the donkey refused,
the 15years that the dog did not want and
the 10years the monkey refused.
" God granted man's wish
And since then, man lives
20 years as a man ,
marries and spends
30 years like a donkey,
working and carrying all the burdens on his back.
Then when his children are grown,
he lives 15years like a dog taking care of the house
and eating whatever is given to him,
so that when he is old,
he can retire and live 10years like a monkey,
going from house to house and from one son or
daughter to another doing tricks to amuse his grandchildren.
That's Life.
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Life Vs Donkey, Dog & Monkey
God created the donkey
and said to him.
"You will be a donkey. You will work un-tiringly from sunrise to sunset
carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass,
you will have no intelligence and you will live 50 years."
The donkey answered:
"I will be a donkey, but to live 50years is much. Give me only 20years"
God granted his wish.
-------------------------------------------
God created the dog
and said to him:
"You will guard the house of man. You will be his best Friend.
You will eat the scraps that he gives you and
you will live 30years.
You will be a dog. "
The dog answered:
"Sir, to live 30years is too much,give me only15 years.
" God granted his wish.
-------------------------------------------
God created the monkey
and said to him:
"You will be a monkey. You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks.
You will be amusing and you will live
20 years. "
The monkey answered:
"To live 20years is too much, give me only 10years."
God granted his wish.
-------------------------------------------
Finally God created man...
and said to him:
"You will be man, the only rational creature on the face of the earth.
You will use your intelligence to become master over all the animals.
You will dominate the world and you will live 20years."
Man responded:
"Sir, I will be a man but to live only
20 years is very little,
give me the 30years that the donkey refused,
the 15years that the dog did not want and
the 10years the monkey refused.
" God granted man's wish
And since then, man lives
20 years as a man ,
marries and spends
30 years like a donkey,
working and carrying all the burdens on his back.
Then when his children are grown,
he lives 15years like a dog taking care of the house
and eating whatever is given to him,
so that when he is old,
he can retire and live 10years like a monkey,
going from house to house and from one son or
daughter to another doing tricks to amuse his grandchildren.
That's Life.
Correct! ;)
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This thread is empty :( I'll post some!!! ;)
One liner jokes :P
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.
We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-b*tch.
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
If sex is a pain in the A**, then you're doing it wrong...
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.
Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.
Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it...so I said "Implants?" ::) :P
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Here's one :P
Vacuum........
A little old lady answered her doorbell and saw a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.
"Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners."
"Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven't got any money!"
As she closed the door, the young man quickly wedged his foot in the door and pushed it open.
"Don't be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration."
And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.
"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, ma'am, I will personally eat the remainder."
The old lady stepped back and said, "Well I hope you've got a damned good appetite, because they cut off my electricity this morning."
:P
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Cinderella Wishes ::)
Cinderella was now 75 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now dead Prince, she happily sat upon her rocking chair, watching the world go by from her front porch, with a cat called Alan for companionship.
One sunny afternoon, out of nowhere, appeared the Fairy Godmother. Cinderella said: 'Fairy Godmother, what are you doing here after all these years?'
The Fairy Godmother replied: 'Well Cinderella, since you have lived a good, wholesome life since we last met, I have decided to grant you 3 wishes. Is there anything for which your heart still yearns?'
Cinderella is taken aback, overjoyed and after some thoughtful consideration and almost under her breath she uttered her first wish. 'I wish I was wealthy beyond comprehension.' Instantly her rocking chair was turned into solid gold. Cinderella was stunned.
Cinderella said 'Oh thank you, Fairy Godmother!' The Fairy Godmother replied 'It is the least I can do. What is your second wish?' Cinderella looked down at her frail body and said: 'I wish I was young and full of the beauty of youth again.'
At once, her wish having been desired, became reality, and her beautiful youthful visage had returned. Cinderella felt stirrings inside her that had been dormant for years and long forgotten vigour and vitality began to course through her very soul. Then the Fairy Godmother spoke again: 'You have one more wish, what shall you have?'
Cinderella looked over to Alan, who was now quivering in the corner with fear. 'I wish you to transform my old cat, Alan, into a beautiful and handsome young man.' Magically, Alan suddenly underwent so fundamental a change in his biologicial make up, that when he stoof before her, he was a boy, so beautiful the like of which she nor the world had ever seen, so fair indeed that birds begun to fall from the sky at his feet.
The Fairy Godmother said: 'Congratulations Cinderella! Enjoy your new life.' With a blazing shock of bright blue electricity, she was gone.
For a few moments, Alan and Cinderella looked into each other's eyes. Cinderella sat, breathless, gazing at the most stunningly perfect boy she had ever seen. Then Alan walked over to Cinderella, who sat transfixed in her rocking chair, and held her close in his muscular arms.
He leant close to her ear, and into her ear breathed as much as whispered, blowing her golden hair with his warm breath, 'I bet you regret having my balls chopped off now, don't you?' :P :P
This joke isn't dirty!!! :P
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Butt joke :P
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking, the monkey starts jumping all over the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them,then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?" The guy says, "No, what?" "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!" says the bartender. "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the patron. "He eats everything in sight, the little twerp. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, and leaves. Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again.
While the man is drinking, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" "Now what?" asks the patron. "Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it!" says the barkeeper.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the patron. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he ate that damn cue ball he measures everything first!"
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Woman and the baked beans!! ::)
Once upon a time there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them but unfortunately they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her.
Then one day she met a guy and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to herself, He is such a sweet and gentle man, he would never go for this carrying on. So she made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.
Some months later her car broke down on the way home from work. Since she lived in the country she called her husband and told him that she would be late because she had to walk home.
On her way she passed a small diner and the odor of the baked beans was more than she could stand.
Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would walk off any ill effects by the time she reached home.
So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had consumed three large orders of baked beans.
All the way home she putt-putted. And upon arriving home she felt reasonably sure she could control it.
Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly, Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight.
He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table. She seated herself and just as he was about to remove the blindfold from his wife, the telephone rang.
He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned. He then went to answer the phone.
The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to one leg and let it go.
It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill. She took her napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously.
Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which reminded her of cooked cabbage.
Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she went on like this for another ten minutes.
When the phone farewells signaled the end of her freedom, she fanned the air a few more times with her napkin, placed it on her lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contentedly to herself.
She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned, apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she assured him that she had not.
At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised!! There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her a Happy Birthday!!!
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A young journalism student at the University of Tennessee was assigned to write a human interest story. He went into the mountains to do some research. There, he found an old farmer sitting on his porch, introduced himself, and explained his mission.
The young man asked, "Has anything ever happened around here that made you really happy?"
After a moment, the farmer said, "Yeah, one time my neighbor's daughter, a fine looking gal, got lost. We formed a posse and found her. After we all screwed her, we took her back home."
"I can't print that!" the young man exclaimed. "Can't you think of anything else that happened that made you happy?"
The farmer thought for a minute and smiled, "Yep! One time a neighbor's sheep got lost. We formed a posse and found it. Then we all screwed it and took it back home."
Again, the young man said "I can't print that, either. Let's try another approach. Has anything ever happened around here that made you really sad?"
The old farmer dropped his head as if he were ashamed, and after a few seconds he looked up timidly at the young man and said, "This one time, I got lost..."
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Another one, cause I'm bored :(
POLITICS
Lil' Johnny goes to his dad and asks, What is politics?
Dad says, Well son, let me try to explain it this way. I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me Capitalism. Mommy is the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you The People. The nanny- well, consider her The Working Class. Your baby brother, we'll call him The Future. Now go think about this and see if it makes sense.
So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying and runs to his room only to find that his diapers are very soiled. So the little boy goes to his parents room. Mom is sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he looks through the peephole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.
The next morning, the little boy says to his father, Dad, I think I understand what politics is now.
Good son, tell me in your own words then what politics are.
The little boy replies, Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep sh*t.
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Nobody's posting in this thread>:( >:( So what I'll keep on posting ;D :P
Report Card
Little Johnny's father said, "let me see your report card."
Johnny replied, "I don't have it."
"Why not?" His father asked.
"My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
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LMAO on each one of them XD :D
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Thanks Vin, ;D Here's another one ;)
Two lawyers are leaving the office. "I can't wait to get home," says one of them. "As soon as I walk in the door, I'm going to rip my wife's panties right off."
"I know the feeling," the other says.
"No, I'm serious," says the first. "They're killing me." :P
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Another ;)
An attractive, well-dressed woman walks into a shop that sells very expensive rugs. She looks around and spots the perfect rug and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the texture of the rug she farts loudly. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed. As she turns back, standing next to her is a salesman.
"Good day, ma'am, how may we help you today?"
Very uncomfortably she asks, "Sir, how much does this rug cost?"
"Ma'am," he answers, "If you farted just touching it, you're gonna crap when you hear the price!"
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Wooo...... ::)
A traveling salesman's car breaks down in the country, so he decides to call on the closest farmhouse.
When the farmer opens the door, the salesman says, "Sir, my car died just up the road. Could I stay here for tonight?"
The farmer says, "Sure, but I have a very handsome son and you'll have to promise not to sleep with him."
"Excuse me," says the salesman, "but I think I'm in the wrong joke."
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LITTLE JOHNNY TELLS A STORY :P
Little Johnny sees his father's car passing the playground and go
into the woods. Curious, he follows the car and sees his father and his aunt Jane "hugging" in the parked vehicle.
Johnny finds this very exciting and can barely contain himself so he runs home and starts to tell his mother,
"I was at the playground and I saw daddy's car go into the woods with aunt Jane. I went to look for them and I saw daddy giving aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt, then aunt Jane helped daddy take his pants off, then aunt Jane lay down on the seat, then daddy..."
At this point, Johnny's mother cut him off and said, "Johnny, this is such an interesting story. Suppose you save the rest of it for suppertime. I want to see the look on daddy's face when you tell it tonight."
At the dinner table, Johnny's mother asks him to tell his story, so Johnny starts to talk, describing the car into the woods, the undressing, laying down on the seat, and...
"...then daddy and aunt Jane did that same thing mommy and uncle Richard used to do when daddy was in the army."
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Little johnny again :P
One day at the end of class little Johnny's teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then infer the moral of that story. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story.
Little Suzy raises her hand. "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road."
The teacher asks for the moral of the story. Suzy replies, "Don't put all your eggs in one basket."
Next is little Lucy. "Well my dad owns a farm too and every weekend we take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only 8 of the 12 eggs hatched."
The teacher asks for the moral of the story. Lucy replies, "Don't count your chicks before they're hatched."
Last is Little Johnny. "My uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war, his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. On the way down he drank the case of beer.Unfortunately, he landed right in the middle of 100 North Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. The blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands."
The teacher looks in shock at Little Johnny and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story. Johnny replies, "Don't screw with Uncle Ted when he's been drinking!!!."
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A man and his wife are in the shower together when the doorbell rings. The wife puts on a robe and goes down to answer the door.
In walks her husband's friend Ben. The woman tells him her husband's in the shower and asks if he can come back later. Instead, Ben steps in and quietly says, "I have $400 in my pocket. I'll give it to you if you'll open your bathrobe for me."
She's offended, but really needs the money so she agrees, opens her robe, and lets Ben have a quick peek before doing it up again. Ben gives her the $400, and she opens the door for him to leave, but he says, "I have another $400 in my other pocket. I'll give it to you if you let me touch your breasts."
Now she's really mortified, but again, she needs the money, so she undoes her robe and lets him have a quick feel. Taking the other $400 from him, she lets him out the door.
Going back upstairs, she gets back in the shower with her husband, feeling a little bit guilty.
"Who was that?" the husband asks.
"Oh, that was just Ben," the wife answers.
"Ben?" the husband says. "That jerk owes me 800 bucks!"
::) ::) ::) :P :P
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Here's another ;D, no offence to anyone...
A 75-year-old man goes to confession and tells the priest, "Forgive me father for I have sinned. I had sex last night with two 20-year-old girls, and I had sex with each one three times."
The priest says, "How long has it been since your last confession, my son?"
The man says, "I have never been to confession, I am Jewish."
"So why are you telling me this?" asks the priest.
The man says, "I'm telling everybody!"
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No offence to anyone especially girls.......I posted it just for fun..... ;)
A guy walked into a pub and immediately noticed a young lady at the bar on her own. After a couple of drinks, he decided to offer her a drink and make small talk.
"What's your name?" he asked.
"Carmen," she replied.
"That's a nice name," he said. "Did your mother or father name you that?"
"Neither," she said. "I changed my name when I was 18 from Sharon to Carmen."
"Why did you do that?" he asked.
"Well," she explained, "I like men and I like cars, so that is how I got my name. What's your name?"
"Beertits," the man replied.
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U'll get it once u paid up ur doctor consultant fees.. :P :P
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No offence to anyone especially girls.......I posted it just for fun..... ;)
A guy walked into a pub and immediately noticed a young lady at the bar on her own. After a couple of drinks, he decided to offer her a drink and make small talk.
"What's your name?" he asked.
"Carmen," she replied.
"That's a nice name," he said. "Did your mother or father name you that?"
"Neither," she said. "I changed my name when I was 18 from Sharon to Carmen."
"Why did you do that?" he asked.
"Well," she explained, "I like men and I like cars, so that is how I got my name. What's your name?"
"Beertits," the man replied.
lol funny
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U'll get it once u paid up ur doctor consultant fees.. :P :P
Take a hike :P
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It's hard to keep on searching and posting jokes Ari,......Don't take them for granted .. >:(...Try searching and posting some... >:( It aint easy >:(.......
Muaaahaahaaa... I bet ur facial expression changed after reading that ::) :P So did u have ur laugh? ::) :P Muaaahaahaaa.... Heck, I'll even post a joke with ur name on it... ::) >:D >:D
Nobody messes with Lord Kratos >:D >:D...
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I know u r here Ari... ::) :P
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Take a hike :P
I will,wit da consultant fee u owe me..u dont hve 2 worry abt paying Lord Kratos, because hez a cheap A** government doctor :P :P
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Nobody messes with Lord Kratos >:D >:D...
"Nobody" if u wanna piece of kratos, u'll hve 2 go throu me first..HAHAHA.. :P
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I will,wit da consultant fee u owe me..u dont hve 2 worry abt paying Lord Kratos, because hez a cheap A** government doctor :P :P
Yeah, but u forgot something immortal, I only provide cheap services to girls... ::) ::) :P for guys its twice the required fee... :P Lets go to Hawaii with that money!!! :P :P
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Yeah, but u forgot something immortal, I only provide cheap services to girls... ::) ::) :P for guys its twice the required fee... :P Lets go to Hawaii with that money!!! :P :P
Naa, sry pal I don't do out wit guyz & hmm.. underhand takings r illegal 4 Gov employees.. :-X
I dont think u'll get great gals, only cheap ones...because Gud ones no no cheap & cheap ones no gud :P :P
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Nobody messes with Lord Kratos >:D >:D...
I don't have time to do that! :P you are too weak to fight with Nobody!
and immortal, i'll crush both of you! 8)
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All you sick perverts.
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All you sick perverts.
Yeah, we're sick perverts ;D and Ari here is a feminist!!! ::) :P
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I should rename this topic to : Pervert's Corner
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All you sick perverts.
Correct.
I request all the contributers, please post clean jokes. It's studentforums.
And ari, please don't do so. :)
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why do we go to school?
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I should rename this topic to : Pervert's Corner
Yeah and I remember SOMEBODY was coming here to have his dose of daily laughter!!! ::) ::) :P
*Ooh, this place is so full of perverts, I'm so embarrased!!! :-[ :-[* ::) :P :P :P :P
ha haaa haaaa haaaaaa
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Yeah, we're sick perverts ;D and Ari here is a feminist!!! ::) :P
I just read your siggy ::)
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why do we go to school?
to tease teachers.. ;D
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why do we go to school?
I like this...lol :P
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I just read your siggy ::)
Ooh, so u who come here for a daily dose of laughter aren't a pervert? ::) Sorry, There must have been another person named like u.... :P :P
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why do we go to school?
Don't know....
But my friend started coming to the class regularly after someone told him about the new hot young teacher!!!
And When I asked him why, he said he had turned into a good boy!!!! ;) ;)
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Don't know....
But my friend started coming to the class regularly after someone told him about the new hot young teacher!!!
And When I asked him why, he said he had turned into a good boy!!!! ;) ;)
LOL ::) da exact thing happened in ma class as well..
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I don't have time to do that! :P you are too weak to fight with Nobody!
and immortal, i'll crush both of you! 8)
No mortal can defeat me >:(..& thou shall not speak of it again >:D >:D
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Alright another joke!!!! ;D Dirty!!! :P :P
A man sat down at a bar and told the bartender, "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can piss into the cup all the way over there on the other side of the bar and not miss a single drop."
The bartender said, "There is no way you can do that. Sure, I'll bet you three hundred dollars."
The man then begins to undo his pants and begins pissing. He starts pissing all over the bar, spraying on the bottles and the bartender, not making a single drop in the cup.
The bartender starts smiling and laughing and says, "That's it, you owe me three hundred dollars."
The man then gets up and walks over to the pool table and starts laughing and shaking hands with the men standing there. He walks back to bar, sits down and starts laughing at the bartender and hands him the money.
The bartender asks, "Why are you laughing? You just lost the bet."
The man said, "I'm laughing because I bet those guys over there one thousand dollars that I could piss all over you and your bar and you would still be laughing when I was done."
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Another ;D
The elderly Italian man went to his parish priest and asked if the priest would hear his confession.
"Of course, my son," said the priest.
"Well, Father, at the beginning of World War Two, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans; I hid her in my attic, and they never found her."
"That's a wonderful thing, my son, and nothing that you need to confess," said the priest.
"It's worse, Father; I was weak, and told her that she had to pay for rent of the attic with her s*xual favors," continued the old man.
"Well, it was a very difficult time, and you took a large risk - you would have suffered terribly at their hands if the Germans had found you hiding her; I know that God, in his wisdom and mercy, will balance the good and the evil, and judge you kindly," said the priest.
"Thanks, Father," said the old man. "That's a load off of my mind. Can I ask another question?"
"Of course, my son," said the priest.
The old man asked, "Do I need to tell her that the war is over?"
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loool @ lord kratos...never get bored of posting jokes
One day a hippie gets a ride on a public bus and sees a hot young nun. He sits down next to her and promptly asks if she would like to have sex, to which she immediately says no and walks off the bus. The bus driver leans over and says "Hey guy I know how to get that nun to have sex with you..."
Naturally the hippie asks, and the bus driver tells him that every night at midnight the nun goes to an old graveyard to pray for god to forgive her for her past, and that he should dress up like god and tell the nun she will be forgiven if she has sex with you.
The hippie gives his thanks and runs to the nearest costume shop.
Later that evening the hippie gets ready for his big night and drives down to the graveyard and sees the nun praying, on her knees. He says "Behold, I have heard your prayers and you shall be forgiven if you have sex with me!"
The nun agrees but asks if they can have anal sex in order to keep her virginity. The hippie agrees and once they are finished the hippie jumps back and pulls off his mask and says "Surpise, its me the Hippie!"
The nun jumps up and pulls off her mask and says "Surprise, its me the bus driver!"
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Another joke but its in a poem :P
You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed
Sing like a bird
Dizzy in my head
Spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold
Buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh you make me smile
Lol!!!! :P Just kidding!!! :P But jokes help in smiling don't they? ::) ;D
A young boy walks into a brothel holding a dead frog. He asks the lady at the front desk "Where is your nastiest most diseased wh***?" She points down the hall to the last door on the right, then asks "Why do you wanna screw her and what's with the frog?" So the boy says "I am going to screw the wh*** then I am going to screw my babysitter who will then screw my father who will screw my mother who screws the mailman who will screw our maid; and that's the B**** who ran over my frog!"
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Alright another joke!!!! ;D Dirty!!! :P :P
A man sat down at a bar and told the bartender, "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can piss into the cup all the way over there on the other side of the bar and not miss a single drop."
The bartender said, "There is no way you can do that. Sure, I'll bet you three hundred dollars."
The man then begins to undo his pants and begins pissing. He starts pissing all over the bar, spraying on the bottles and the bartender, not making a single drop in the cup.
The bartender starts smiling and laughing and says, "That's it, you owe me three hundred dollars."
The man then gets up and walks over to the pool table and starts laughing and shaking hands with the men standing there. He walks back to bar, sits down and starts laughing at the bartender and hands him the money.
The bartender asks, "Why are you laughing? You just lost the bet."
The man said, "I'm laughing because I bet those guys over there one thousand dollars that I could piss all over you and your bar and you would still be laughing when I was done."
LMAOOO.....
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loool @ lord kratos...never get bored of posting jokes
One day a hippie gets a ride on a public bus and sees a hot young nun. He sits down next to her and promptly asks if she would like to have sex, to which she immediately says no and walks off the bus. The bus driver leans over and says "Hey guy I know how to get that nun to have sex with you..."
Naturally the hippie asks, and the bus driver tells him that every night at midnight the nun goes to an old graveyard to pray for god to forgive her for her past, and that he should dress up like god and tell the nun she will be forgiven if she has sex with you.
The hippie gives his thanks and runs to the nearest costume shop.
Later that evening the hippie gets ready for his big night and drives down to the graveyard and sees the nun praying, on her knees. He says "Behold, I have heard your prayers and you shall be forgiven if you have sex with me!"
The nun agrees but asks if they can have anal sex in order to keep her virginity. The hippie agrees and once they are finished the hippie jumps back and pulls off his mask and says "Surpise, its me the Hippie!"
The nun jumps up and pulls off her mask and says "Surprise, its me the bus driver!"
Nooo, dodi, I already posted this joke :P :P. Now, I shall sue You for $10 million for copyright infringement!!!!! :P :P (joking ::))
Be ready or prepare the mony by tonight!!!!! :P :P :P
Hope u get the money ready by toda
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loool no im broke!!!!!
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what is the cows fav music
Moousic :P :P
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Another one but bad!!! ;) Well not so bad.... ::)
A girl invites her boyfriend home for dinner and tells him they'll go for a long ride after that.
Boy is eager and gets his motorbike checked at the garage. The mechanic tells him everything is ok except the tank cap, which is slightly loose. So as to avoid water going in. The boy immediately purchases a tube of vaseline and heads off towards his girlfriends house.
Upon reaching there his girlfriend tells him secretly that the situation in the house is bad as nobody at home has done the dishes or chores for several weeks and the house is a complete mess and that they had decided that whoever speaks first today at dinner would clean up everything.
Boy enters the house and sure enough the place is unbelievably dirty and everyone sits down silently at the dinner table. The boy gets a mischievous idea and jumps on his girlfriend rips of her clothes and has take her in front of everyone.
Girlfriend gets excited, mom is embarrassed and dad is furious. But nobody speaks a word.
After sometime the boy gets another idea and this time goes to mother and has s*x with her. Mother is excited, daughter and father are infuriated. But still nobody speaks.
A little more time passes and the boy hears a clap of thunder and remembers his bike and whips out the vaseline and gets up when the father screams ,"OH NO. I' LL DO THE DISHES"
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Another ;) Am I cool or what? 8) 8)
There is an Englishman, American, and an Australian. All 3 are dared to stay in a haunted house for 1 night. So the American walks in and hears this voice: I'm gonna get ya, I'm gonna eat ya! The American ran out of the house screaming and died of a panic attack. The Australian walks in and hears the same voice: I'm gonna get ya, I'm gonna eat ya! The Australian jumps out of the window and dies. The Englishman walks in and hears the same voice: I'm gonna get ya, I'm gonna eat ya! The Englishman realises the voice is coming from a closed cupboard. So he walks over and opens the cupboard. Sitting there is a monkey picking his nose saying: I'm gonna get ya, I'm gonna eat ya!
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I'm bored.... I miss someone....:( tell me a joke.... :(
If not then I'll tell myself one!!!! :)
1.A female teacher in a school said to the 10 yrs student , "if you Answer the question , I'll kiss you" He said " would you sleep with me if i do the homework ? "
2.why does a blond turn the care upside down ?
to figure out if it is female or male.
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Another one ;D
A couple is lying in bed, on their 20th wedding anniversary. The woman suddenly feels her husband touching her in ways that he hadn't done in years. He started at her neck, and slowly traced a line downward, past the small of her back. He caressed one shoulder, then the other, and continued down across her breasts, stopping just below her navel.
Next, he placed his hand on her left inner arm, and caressed down her side, stopping at her hip. He started over again on her right side, then brushed gently across her buttocks, and down her leg. As his hand was making its way up the inside of her left leg, he abruptly stopped and rolled over.
She had become very aroused by all of this attention, and asked in a loving voice, "That was amazing, darling. Why did you stop?"
He cleared his throat, looked at her and said "Found the remote."
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No offence to anyone, especially girls.... It's a good one ;)
Thre are 3 blondes stranded on an island.A genie comes and grants them a wish each.The first blond asks to be smart.She turns into a brunette and she swims off.The second blonde asks to be even smarter so he turns her into a ginger haired person and she builds a boat and sails away.The third blonde asks to be even smarter,so the genie turns her into a man and he walks over the bridge!!!!
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Its a joke containing rude words so I'm gonna BLEEEEEEEEEEP it!!!! :P
A guy walks into a disco at a friend's house when he notices an armless and legless woman sitting in a corner. Feeling sorry for her, he walks up to her and says:
"Hi, I was just wondering, have you ever been kissed before?"
The woman replies, "No...", so the gentleman kisses her.
Then he asks, "Have you ever been felt up before?"
The woman smiles and once again replies, "No...", so, of course, the guy feels her up.
Suddenly the strange man asks, "Have you ever been f**ked before?"
Surprised but some-what excited at what is yet to come, the lady replies, "No..."
So, the guy picks her up, takes her outside, throws her in the pool and says, "Now you're f**ked!"
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No offence alright? Its meant to be a joke!!! ::) :P
A woman was walking down the street with her boob hanging out her top a man comes up and says sorry to tell you this but your boob is hangin out and she cries 'ohh no i have left the baby on the bus'
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There were three people one blonde headed, orange and green headed.
They went to the bar to get a drink. The blond headed asked for a drink but the bartender said only if you tell me how your hair got that hair colour . He said its natural.
The orange head dude came and said can i have a drink of water but the bartender said only if you tell me how you got that hair colour and he said i dyed it.
Then the green head dude asked for a drink and the bartender said only if you tell me how you got that hair colour and he rubbed his noise and stroked his hair and said i don't know.
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Another... No offence ::) :P
A man, who smelled like a distillery, flopped down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and
began reading.
After a few minutes the disheveled man turned to the priest and said, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?"
"Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap wicked women, too much alcohol, and a contempt for your fellow man."
"Well, I'll be damned," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized.
"I'm very sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
"I don't have it, Father. I was just reading that the Pope does."
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Another one about adam and eve...woo woo :P :P
Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands. When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
"You're running around with other women," she charged.
"You're being unreasonable," Adam responded. "You're the only woman on earth."
The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.
"What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
"Counting your ribs!"
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Another one!!!! 8) 8)
There are four people in the carriage of a train - an Englishman, a pretty young blonde girl, an ugly old woman and a Frenchman.
It all goes dark when the train goes through a tunnel. In the dark there's the sound of an almighty slap, and when the train emerges from the tunnel the Frenchman is rubbing his face, and there's a huge red mark on his cheek.
The old lady thinks "I bet that Frenchman fondled the blonde in the dark and she slapped him" The pretty young blonde thinks "I bet the Frenchman tried to fondle me in the dark, got the old lady by mistake, and she hit him" The Frenchman thinks "I bet that Englishman fondled the blonde in the dark, but the blonde thought it was me and hit me"
The Englishman thinks "I hope there's another tunnel coming up soon so I can slap that French tw@t again"
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This one's awesome!!!! ;D
Aman walks into a bar and spots a beautiful woman sat on her own.
He aproaches her and offers a drink and the woman accepts.
While talking about each other the woman claims she is 54, the man is amazed and thinks wow she looks quite hot.
They get on so well the woman ask's him if he has ever had a mother daughter threesome, with a grin on his face he says nope and the woman kindly offers to fullful that missing part in his life .
As they approach the bottom of the woman's stairway at her house the man is disgusted when his date shouts up the stairs " MUM ARE YOU STILL AWAKE? "
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I pity you. You are such a loner :P
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I pity you. You are such a loner :P
ARI .wth?! ... i'm readin his jokes but i simply don't reply !
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Thank U Golden girl!!!!! ;D ;D ;D
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Thank U Golden girl!!!!! ;D ;D ;D
np :D
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This one's awesome!!!! ;D
Aman walks into a bar and spots a beautiful woman sat on her own.
He aproaches her and offers a drink and the woman accepts.
While talking about each other the woman claims she is 54, the man is amazed and thinks wow she looks quite hot.
They get on so well the woman ask's him if he has ever had a mother daughter threesome, with a grin on his face he says nope and the woman kindly offers to fullful that missing part in his life .
As they approach the bottom of the woman's stairway at her house the man is disgusted when his date shouts up the stairs " MUM ARE YOU STILL AWAKE? "
hahahahaha, nice one
check out this site, ur gonna lagh ur brains out!!!!!
http://comixed.com/
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No offence alright? Its meant to be a joke!!! ::) :P
A woman was walking down the street with her boob hanging out her top a man comes up and says sorry to tell you this but your boob is hangin out and she cries 'ohh no i have left the baby on the bus'
hahahahaha! GOSH DUDE! YOU ARE A P.E.R.V.E.R.T. All your jokes are over-rated. ::) ::) :P
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Nope I am a guy!!!! ;) ;)
Believe me, Freud says If u don't have these types of feelings at this age then U are abnormal!!!! :P :P
You should go visit a pyschiatrist!!!! ::) ::) :P :P
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That was a lie dude. Just some crap scientific excuse.
Sheesh on guys these days. It wasn't the same in the old days and my dad was never like that I am sure. :P
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That was a lie dude. Just some crap scientific excuse.
Sheesh on guys these days. It wasn't the same in the old days and my dad was never like that I am sure. :P
SO u were born as a test tube baby huh? ::) :P :P
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That was a lie dude. Just some crap scientific excuse.
Sheesh on guys these days. It wasn't the same in the old days and my dad was never like that I am sure. :P
ofcourse ur dad can never be like a girl like u.
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@kratos ew dude. I meant when he was in that age but then he got married to mummi. ::)
@sgvaibahv ... ??? explain? :P
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I read his jokes too...some are gross :-[...some are good :)
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@kratos ew dude. I meant when he was in that age but then he got married to mummi. ::)
@sgvaibahv ... ??? explain? :P
Nope, u meant it like he had no emotions at all!!! ::) :P
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I read his jokes too...some are gross :-[...some are good :)
What do u mean by gross? >:( I bet u enjoyed that!!! ::) :P
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the latest ones? No ::)
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the latest ones? No ::)
Phat again!!! ::) :P
WHy? Something good happened/ ::) ::)
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Phat again!!! ::) :P
WHy? Something good happened/ ::) ::)
wtv
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wtv
U always say wtv to things u don't like don't ya? ::) ::)
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U always say wtv to things u don't like don't ya? ::) ::)
well spotted :P
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well spotted :P
Nope!!! So gonna confess in that thread? ::) ::)
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Nope, u meant it like he had no emotions at all!!! ::) :P
::) ::) ::) no. I didn't say that.
Having emotions doesn't mean using pick-lines and posting perverted jokes. :P
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::) ::) ::) no. I didn't say that.
Having emotions doesn't mean using pick-lines and posting perverted jokes. :P
No, what does using pick-up lines and telling perverted jokes got anything related to that? :P
Besides, who told u I'm like that in real life ? or not? ::) ::) ::)
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No, what does using pick-up lines and telling perverted jokes got anything related to that? :P
Besides, who told u I'm like that in real life ? or not? ::) ::) ::)
Well I am imagining u r the shy kind off guy who blushes when any girl looks at him :P
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Well I am imagining u r the shy kind off guy who blushes when any girl looks at him :P
Yep!!! :P :P
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Yep!!! :P :P
Holy crap! :o :o
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And u r a hyperactive girl who kicks any male out of her sight!!! :P :P :P
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Yep!!! :P :P
HAHAHAHHAHAHA SERIOUSLY?! :o
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW :P :P :P :P :P
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i thought this was a place for jokes..but u guys are arguing.....???
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And u r a hyperactive girl who kicks any male out of her sight!!! :P :P :P
Yes, I kick guys be rejecting them but I am not hyper at all. I am always quiet and serious. =]
@gunman u r welcomed to join :P
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And u r a hyperactive girl who kicks any male out of her sight!!! :P :P :P
Naahh
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HAHAHAHHAHAHA SERIOUSLY?! :o
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW :P :P :P :P :P
Yep, I am so shy that I kiss a girl first and run away!!! :P :P :P
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Yes, I kick guys be rejecting them but I am not hyper at all. I am always quiet and serious. =]
@gunman u r welcomed to join :P
so u r like a cute little cat who just sits quitley on the sofa.....:P doesnt move around the house...just give u milk and u r gud to go...:P
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so u r like a cute little cat who just sits quitley on the sofa.....:P doesnt move around the house...just give u milk and u r gud to go...:P
Yup, give her a nice cat massage ;) and voila!!!!! :P :P
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Yup, give her a nice cat massage ;) and voila!!!!! :P :P
hahaha...lool cat massag ::) ;) ;)
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so u r like a cute little cat who just sits quitley on the sofa.....:P doesnt move around the house...just give u milk and u r gud to go...:P
Yes. :P
@Kratos, so you even kiss girls? wow. ::)
@kratos again....cat massage? bwahahahaahha! I don't need that I'LL SCRATCH U ! ;) :P
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Yes. :P
@Kratos, so you even kiss girls? wow. ::)
@kratos again....cat massage? bwahahahaahha! I don't need that I'LL SCRATCH U ! ;) :P
believe me...
Cats don't scratch the person not interested in them...
They want attention and the less attention they get from a person, the more they want that person!!! :P :P
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Yes. :P
@Kratos, so you even kiss girls? wow. ::)
@kratos again....cat massage? bwahahahaahha! I don't need that I'LL SCRATCH U ! ;) :P
okay u noe wat..ull like the masage...no need to scratch.. ;) ::)....
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Both of you just fly.
Such perverts. *e-slaps*
:P
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Both of you just fly.
Such perverts. *e-slaps*
:P
tht means u give up.....caty
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Both of you just fly.
Such perverts. *e-slaps*
:P
ur no. of post....11100 :o
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LOL Yes. I talk a lot :P Been here for more than a year and I am an admin.
So it isn't U who gave up :P
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Both of you just fly.
Such perverts. *e-slaps*
:P
When u don't have words to throw at us, u can call us all names u want... ::)
After all, its the easiest thing to do.... ;).
And cats like comfort!!! ::)
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Hello ! ;D
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LOL Yes. I talk a lot :P Been here for more than a year and I am an admin.
So it isn't U who gave up :P
lol.u noe wat tht doesnt make u beter....no offence
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LOL Yes. I talk a lot :P Been here for more than a year and I am an admin.
So it isn't U who gave up :P
its quite simple...u r a girl and cant win....
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Hey Ari, I need help here.
Ari is batman you see. :P
@Kratos, lol I need to comfort maybe cats do but I am a human after all :P
@Gunman where r u from?> ::)
@gunman again? LOL I ALREADY DID PFFFT. :P
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Hey Ari, I need help here.
Ari is batman you see. :P
@Kratos, lol I need to comfort maybe cats do but I am a human after all :P
@Gunman where r u from?> ::)
@gunman again? LOL I ALREADY DID PFFFT. :P
okay watever....yea i m a pakistani...:) and i live in uae
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LOL Yes. I talk a lot :P Been here for more than a year and I am an admin.
So it isn't U who gave up :P
Yep....Guys be afraid of Mony!!!! :o I forgot about her powers!!!!
Her special power includes talking, talking and talking!!!!! :P :P
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okay watever....yea i m a pakistani...:) and i live in uae
aaa wat abt u??
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Yep....Guys be afraid of Mony!!!! :o I forgot about her powers!!!!
Her special power includes talking, talking and talking!!!!! :P :P
luks like..she lost her powers..:P she ran.....
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@kratos my talking can break you down mentally but I am being nice. :P
@gunman...nice.=] I am egyptian :P
@gunman again, I am still here but it says this whenever i try to post : Warning - while you were typing a new reply has been posted. You may wish to review your post.
::) ::) ::)
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@kratos my talking can break you down mentally but I am being nice. :P
@gunman...nice.=] I am egyptian :P
@gunman again, I am still here but it says this whenever i try to post : Warning - while you were typing a new reply has been posted. You may wish to review your post.
::) ::) ::)
Yeah, like a liliputian,twig like catgirl can defeat lord kratos!!!! ::) ::)
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The Lion Son Of Israel is here. What is it that is required of me ?
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@kratos my talking can break you down mentally but I am being nice. :P
@gunman...nice.=] I am egyptian :P
@gunman again, I am still here but it says this whenever i try to post : Warning - while you were typing a new reply has been posted. You may wish to review your post.
::) ::) ::)
hahahahahaha lololol :o :o :o i dont believ u r an administrator....okay..do u noew tht u caN CHANGE THE setings so tht the replie thing doesnt annoy uu every time.....and dont lie...:P
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Lol Lord Kratos, i left for 2 days and i come back to see u still owning xD
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Lol Lord Kratos, i left for 2 days and i come back to see u still owning xD
Thanks Baladya. ;)
Ur sig is nice ;), I want to say it to everyone around here!! :P :P
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@Ari, don't worry I can handle it alone. I think I already did actually. :P
@lord kratos...LOL U have been defeated already.
so tell me..u have a gf? :P
@ Baladya, I owned him already :P
@gunman ...i dont get ur question? u dont want to like get a notification that u got a new replies?
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Thanks Baladya. ;)
Ur sig is nice ;), I want to say it to everyone around here!! :P :P
haha ill tell u sumthing..no offennce....ur parents did use it but the brand was not reliable..:P
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@Ari, don't worry I can handle it alone. I think I already did actually. :P
@lord kratos...LOL U have been defeated already.
so tell me..u have a gf? :P
@ Baladya, I owned him already :P
@gunman ...i dont get ur question? u dont want to like get a notification that u got a new replies?
yea the red thing u get on the top of the post replly thing wen u r posting...the message is lik..warning 3 new replies have been posted ..u may whish to reveiw ur repli
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I really don't know much about your sig baladya but I don't believe it is an appropriate one in an educational forum.
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Sorry to say gumnam, I was actually the most wanted child in my whole family!!! :P :P
and mony, it is gumnam not gunman!!!! :P :P
U have got bad spelling!!! ::) ::)
@Ari, don't worry I can handle it alone. I think I already did actually. :P
@lord kratos...LOL U have been defeated already.
so tell me..u have a gf? :P
WHy do u wanna know? :P
and what do u mean by "I already owned him"? ???
What u bought me for a pet or something? >:(
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I really don't know much about your sig baladya but I don't believe it is an appropriate one in an educational forum.
Baladya,Let me borrow ur sig for a while ;)
Mony, I really think that......................................!!!!! ::) ::) :P :P
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Gumnam ohhh okay. hahahahahahhaha looooool sorry, I didn't concentrate much.
@Kratos, hmm nevermind. I just wanted to know, because you seem to be a pretender here while in real life u r so shy and stuff :P
@Kratos, you think what?
And idk what is it exactly but I think I do have an idea so Kindly baladya just change it. I can change it for you but I will let you do it. =]
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@mony....did u get the setting thingy... ??? :-\
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Mony, Baladya's sig is an educational one ;)
U know when world's population is booming at an incredible rate!!!! .........................................::) ::) ::)
Also, they teach about those stuffs in health education!!!! :P :P
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@gumnam, I didn't get your question.
@kratos, No. I do not agree.
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Mony, Baladya's sig is an educational one ;)
U know when world's population is booming at an incredible rate!!!! .........................................::) ::) ::)
Also, they teach about those stuffs in health education!!!! :P :P
i was going to say the healh point...: :-\
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@kratos, No. I do not agree.
U don't agree? ??? Why ?
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@gumnam, I didn't get your question.
@kratos, No. I do not agree.
arghhhhhh........okay again...here we go....when we post a reply...sumtimes the thing is not processed..and a message apears on the top in red..sayin ...warning while u were typing 1,2,3,or watever no....replies have been posted..u may wish to reveiw ur cooment...............do u noe tht wen can stop this thing by changing a setting.......get it silly CAT. ::)
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U don't agree? ??? Why ?
she is too dumb too get it.. :P no offence
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everybody's bored huh? :(
no worries to fear, when lord kratos is here!!!! :P :P
a drunk man having a bit to much to drink and got up and said ''all laywers are assholes''
another man accross the bar says '' i resent that''
the first man then said'' why are you a laywer?''
the second man replied'' no im an a**hole''
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another ;)
A man was sitting in a bar looking at his drink for half an hour when a big scary biker walks up to him and takes his drink and drinks it.
The first man looks up at him and starts crying. the biker says ''oh i was only joking .I'll by you a new drink, i just can't stand to see someone cry''.
Then the fist man replied '' no its not that. Its just i've been having the worst day ever. First i was late for work so i got fired then my car broke down then when i got home i caught my wife cheating on me and when i think of ending it all you drink my poison!!!!!"
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I am not silly or dumb. You are not being clear here.
And no, you can't change or stop that.
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another ;)
A man was sitting in a bar looking at his drink for half an hour when a big scary biker walks up to him and takes his drink and drinks it.
The first man looks up at him and starts crying. the biker says ''oh i was only joking .I'll by you a new drink, i just can't stand to see someone cry''.
Then the fist man replied '' no its not that. Its just i've been having the worst day ever. First i was late for work so i got fired then my car broke down then when i got home i caught my wife cheating on me and when i think of ending it all you drink my poison!!!!!"
Man, that was not funny....
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I am not silly or dumb. You are not being clear here.
And no, you can't change or stop that.
WHy not? ??? I thought it was ;)
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A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. "Hurry!" she said, "stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you to," she whispered. "Just pretend you're a statue."
"What's this, honey?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.
"Oh, it's just a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too." No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep.
Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk.
"Here," he said to the 'statue', "eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths' for three days and nobody offered me as much as a glass of water."
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A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. "Hurry!" she said, "stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you to," she whispered. "Just pretend you're a statue."
"What's this, honey?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.
"Oh, it's just a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too." No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep.
Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk.
"Here," he said to the 'statue', "eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths' for three days and nobody offered me as much as a glass of water."
hahaha dude funny :D
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Hey kratos..r u bored? ::)
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Hey kratos..r u bored? ::)
Nope ::)
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Nope ::)
ofc u r not because you are talking to 253535353 other girls. :P
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Looool u guys are hilarious xD ;D ;D Well ya Mony, i said the same thing in the beginning xD Anyway, take it Lord :P Time to change :P
just right click and take link :P
Anyway, 8 more days for freedom :D
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ofc u r not because you are talking to 253535353 other girls. :P
how did u know that I was on such demand? ::)
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how did u know that I was on such demand? ::)
Her catty sense r mayb another admin whose misusing der power ::)
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@ Kratos keep ur private life(gf), away frm preying eyes.. :P
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Her catty sense r mayb another admin whose misusing der power ::)
Yep, admin dictatorship!!!!! >:( >:(
@ Kratos keep ur private life(gf), away frm preying eyes.. :P
I should follow ur nice suggestion!!!! ;D
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@Baladya, thank you. =]
@immortal, No. I do not misuse my admin power.
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Here's a new one :P :P
I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married.
My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister.
My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.
She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word.
She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.
I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car.
My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
The moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car!
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Here's another!!!! ;D ;D ;D
Young David came home from school one day and found his pet chicken laying on the ground with his legs pointing straight up into the sky. When his father got home, he explained that the chicken has died and his legs were pointed up to Jesus in heaven.
They buried the chicken and that was that. Two weeks later his dad came home from work and David ran up to him yelling, "Daddy, Daddy, we nearly lost Mommy today."
"What?" his father replied.
"When I got home from school, Mommy was laying on the bed with her legs pointing up in the air yelling, 'Jesus, I'm coming, Jesus I'm coming.' If it wasn't for Uncle Terry holding her down we would have lost her for sure!"
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Another!!! ;)
A little boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, "Where's Mom and dad?" and she replied, "they're up in bed."
The little boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he came back in for lunch and asked his grandma "where's Mom and Dad?" and she replied "they're still up in bed."
Again the little boy started to giggle and he ate his lunch and went out to play. Then the little boy came in for dinner and once again he asked his grandma "where's Mom and dad?" and his grandmother replied "they're still up in bed."
The little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, "what gives? Every time I tell you they're still up in bed you start to laugh! what is going on here?" The little boy replied, "well last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue."
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Another!!! ;)
A little boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, "Where's Mom and dad?" and she replied, "they're up in bed."
The little boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he came back in for lunch and asked his grandma "where's Mom and Dad?" and she replied "they're still up in bed."
Again the little boy started to giggle and he ate his lunch and went out to play. Then the little boy came in for dinner and once again he asked his grandma "where's Mom and dad?" and his grandmother replied "they're still up in bed."
The little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, "what gives? Every time I tell you they're still up in bed you start to laugh! what is going on here?" The little boy replied, "well last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue."
hahahhahaha
lol real funny
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Thanks kim!!!! ;D
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Here's another one!!! ;D
What did the instructor at the school for Kamikaze pilots say to his students?
Watch closely. I'm only going to do this once.
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Here's another one!!! ;D
What did the instructor at the school for Kamikaze pilots say to his students?
Watch closely. I'm only going to do this once.
hahaha dude awesome
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I am not silly or dumb. You are not being clear here.
And no, you can't change or stop that.
Okay go to ur profile then setings. Then forum layout setings i m nkt sure if it is that option bu in one of them ull find many chek boxex. One of tyem stops it .:::.:.:$:$
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lmfao
dose are jus 2 hilarios
:D :d :D
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Another!!! ;)
A little boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, "Where's Mom and dad?" and she replied, "they're up in bed."
The little boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he came back in for lunch and asked his grandma "where's Mom and Dad?" and she replied "they're still up in bed."
Again the little boy started to giggle and he ate his lunch and went out to play. Then the little boy came in for dinner and once again he asked his grandma "where's Mom and dad?" and his grandmother replied "they're still up in bed."
The little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, "what gives? Every time I tell you they're still up in bed you start to laugh! what is going on here?" The little boy replied, "well last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue."
hahaha lol...super glue
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ANother one guys!!!! 8) 8) 8) 8)Am I cool or what? 8) 8) 8)
Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, slipped quietly into the garage to hook the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.
There was snow mixed with the rain, and the wind was blowing 50 mph. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day.
I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. There I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."
She sleepily replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that crap?"
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ANother one guys!!!! 8) 8) 8) 8)Am I cool or what? 8) 8) 8)
Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, slipped quietly into the garage to hook the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.
There was snow mixed with the rain, and the wind was blowing 50 mph. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day.
I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. There I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."
She sleepily replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that crap?"
nice dude hahahahahahahahahahahahaha
8)
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Here's a new one :P :P
I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married.
My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister.
My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.
She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word.
She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.
I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car.
My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
The moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car!
hahahhahhahahahaha LOL lol....i m on the floor
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ANother one guys!!!! 8) 8) 8) 8)Am I cool or what? 8) 8) 8)
Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, slipped quietly into the garage to hook the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.
There was snow mixed with the rain, and the wind was blowing 50 mph. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day.
I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. There I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."
She sleepily replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that crap?"
lol....i hav a q...seriously were do u get these frm
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MUAAHAAAHAAAHAAA :P
A little girl asked her dad if she can take the dog out for a walk.
Her dad said no because the dog was in heat!The girl said please,then her dad said yes and poured gas on the dogs.
But when the little girl comes back,she asked if she could take the dog for a walk again,and her dad said yes and put more gas on the dogs.
But when the little girl comes back this time,she didn't have the dog,and her dad asked were the dog was and the little girl said the dog ran out of gas and another dog is pushing it home.
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Another :P
What should u never do to a blind guy ?
Punch them in the face and say bet ya never saw that coming.
And what should u never do to a guy that's got no legs and is on a wheel chair ?
Attach a bomb to the wheel chair and tell them to run.
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NEVER TRUST A WOMAN!!!! :P
A man and a woman, best friends for ages are sitting in a bar, the woman, (rather hastily) asks the man to marry her, the man (also rather hastily) sais yes, but the woman, very pleased to be engaged suddenly turns serious and says, "i will only marry you if you do not look in the top drawer of my bedside cabinet, the man, (rather confuzzled) agrees to it as they are just married and it won't be anything bad.
70 years later the man, on his death bed, asks the woman "as we have been married for a while now and i am nearing the end of my life, can I look in your top drawer?"
The woman surprisingly to the man, answers yes, so the man opens the top drawer and finds 3 eggs and a million dollars, the man first asks what the eggs are for, the woman replies "Everytime I have been bad or lied to you I put an egg in the drawer", the man rather happy that she's only been disfaithful 3 times then asks, what is the million dollars all about then, the woman with a small grin on her face says, "Everytime I got half a dozen eggs I sold them"!!!
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A man was in jail for 35 years. While in jail he finds an ant and tells himself this is going to be the best well trained ant to ever live.
He teaches it to do tricks over the years, and many other amazing feats. He finally gets out of jail and walks into a bar. He places the ant on the counter as he calls the bartender over. He points at the ant as the bartender leans down to look. The bartender frowns as he balls up his fist and slams it down on the ant as he says "yeah, damn things are everywhere"
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Adam was feeling lonely in the Garden of Eden, and so God said:"I can create a woman for you." "What's that?" asked Adam.
"Oh, it's something really nice", God replied. "Lovely to look at, gentle, kind, sex whenever you want it, never has a headache..."
"Sounds great", said Adam, "but I bet it doesn't come cheap. What'll it cost me?" "An arm and a leg", God replied. Adam thought about it for a minute, then asked: "What can I have for a rib?" The rest is history...
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Two KGB agents are taking a walk in a Moscow suburb. One says to the other "You know Dimitri, I have had training to make anyone, and I mean anyone talk through the power of the mind" "Really? Prove it" Replies Pavel Dimitri pointed to a long queue of people outside a Bakers shop.
"See that queue. I can make the owner come out and tell them that he has sold out. Watch" Dimitri closed his eyes and concentrated on the shop. Sure enough after one minute the owner popped out and announced that he had completely sold out. The queue dispersed, but the people complaimned loudly that there was clearly plenty of bread for sale.
Both agents walked on. "Hmm, impressive but I am still not convinced" said Pavel. The two continued until they reached a miserable part of the city. "See that apartment block?" Said Dimitri. "Well, just watch, I can make the owner of that one on the fifth floor throw out his TV" "Go ahead" Said Pavel. So Dimitri closed his eyes concentrated on the apartment.
After two minutes nothing had happened. "Ha! What rubbish" said Pavel. Dimitri raised his hands skywards as if to invoke a deity. Five more minutes passed. "Oh come on lets go. This just proves it's all rubbish" insisted Pavel "One last try" Said Dimitri, and he screwed up his face and concentrated with all his might. After two minutes a man ran to the fifth floor balcony screaming "WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? I DON'T HAVE A TV!!!!!!!!!".
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Three Texan surgeons playing a round of golf.
As they're walking down the fairway, they strike up a conversation and the first surgeon says, " I reckon I'm the best surgeon in the world".
The other two enquire why and the first surgeon says, "I had a patient brought to me recently who had lost both his hands in an industrial accident. I sewed them back on and today that man has an audience to play the piano for Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth".
The second surgeon scoffs at this and says,"that's nothing. Why I had a patient who lost both his arms in an automobile accident and I sewed them back on. At the last Olympic Games that man won a Gold Medal in the Field events".
The third surgeon says, "that's nothing. Several years ago a cowboy, high on alcohol and drugs, was riding his horse down a railroad track and collided with an oncoming express train. All I had to work with was the horse's arse and a cowboy hat. Today that man is the EX-President of the USA.
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MUAHAHAHAAA >:D >:D
A woman walks into a shop with her two kids. The shopkeeper asks, "Are they twins?" "No," the woman responds, surprised. "One is 7, the other is 9. Do they look alike?" The shopkeeper shrugs his shoulders and says "No, I just can't believe someone like you got laid twice!"
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buaahhahahaha
:D
:D
lmfao
*tears in my eyes*
mr joke master!!!
:P
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Hey Lord Kratos
awesome jokes!!
hahahaha ;D :D ;D
anyways i hve some good jokes on my site also
if u want ill pm them 2 u
keep up the great work!!
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i want someone to make a new thread, which only has jokes and no comments.
A polished jokes thread :D
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A cricket Joke!
No wides
Later on in the same match a lot of wides were being bowled, but it was obvious that the umpire didn't know that anything was wrong.
After a particularly wide delivery, the exasperated batsman said, 'Surely that was a wide!'
The umpire nodded sagely. 'Arr,' he said, 'I don t think I ever saw one wider!'
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Here's another :P This one is as funny as hell 8)
But its only for those who are 13 and above :P All the kiddies get out of here!!! :P
Tarzan ::)
One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle.
She was very attracted to him and during her questions about his life she asked him how he managed for sex.
“What's that?” he asked.
She explained to him what sex was and he said “Oh, Tarzan use a hole in the trunk of tree!”
Horrified, she said, “Tarzan you have it all wrong but I will show you how to do it properly.”
She took off her clothes, laid down on the ground and spread her legs wide. “Here,” she said, “you must put it in here.”
Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the crotch.
Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, “What the hell did you do that for?”
“Tarzan check for bees first!”
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another one- but its gay!! :P :P
Three men have horrible habits they need to quit. One day they find a lamp and the genie inside tells them that he will do them a favor. He curses them so that the next time they indulge in their habits they will die.
The first man was an alcoholic, the next was a smoker and the third was a homosexual. The first week the alcoholic can't take it anymore and he walks into a bar for a whiskey sour. He drops dead on the spot.
The smoker and the homosexual were walking together on the street when someone drops a smoldering cigarette. The smoker considers it carefully. The gay guy turns and says, "Man, if you bend over to pick that up we are both dead!"
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Here's another :P This one is as funny as hell 8)
But its only for those who are 13 and above :P All the kiddies get out of here!!! :P
Tarzan ::)
One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle.
She was very attracted to him and during her questions about his life she asked him how he managed for sex.
“What's that?” he asked.
She explained to him what sex was and he said “Oh, Tarzan use a hole in the trunk of tree!”
Horrified, she said, “Tarzan you have it all wrong but I will show you how to do it properly.”
She took off her clothes, laid down on the ground and spread her legs wide. “Here,” she said, “you must put it in here.”
Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the crotch.
Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, “What the hell did you do that for?”
“Tarzan check for bees first!”
hahahahahaha lol....lol
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MUAHAHAHAAA >:D >:D
A woman walks into a shop with her two kids. The shopkeeper asks, "Are they twins?" "No," the woman responds, surprised. "One is 7, the other is 9. Do they look alike?" The shopkeeper shrugs his shoulders and says "No, I just can't believe someone like you got laid twice!"
lol
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What did the Policeman say to the stomach?
You're under a vest
What's six inches long and two inches wide and drives women wild?
Money.
What were U thinking? ::)
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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains!!
Pull yourself together, man!
What does a fish pick it's nose with?
- Fish Fingers.
What's the last thing to enter a fly's head before it hits the windscreen?
- It's A**.
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THE 5 QUESTIONS MOST FEARED BY MEN ::)
The 5 questions most feared by men are:
1. What are you thinking about?
2. Do you love me?
3. Do I look fat in this?
4. Do you think she is prettier than me?
5. What would you do if I died?
What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e., tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses.
Question # 1: What are you thinking about? The proper answer to this, of course, is: " I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you." This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most likely is one of the following:
a. Football.
b. Golf.
c. How fat you are.
d. How much prettier she is than you
e. How I would spend the insurance money if you died.
Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you!"
Question # 2: Do you love me? The proper response is: "YES!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in order, "Yes, dear."
Inappropriate responses include:
a. Oh Yeah, sh@*-loads.
b. Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
c. That depends on what you mean by love.
d. Does it matter?
e. Who, me?
Question # 3: Do I look fat?
The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Among the incorrect answers are:
a. Compared to what?
b. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin.
c. A little extra weight looks good on you.
d. I've seen fatter.
e. Sorry what did you say? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.
Question # 4: Do you think she's prettier than me?
Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Incorrect responses include:
a. Yes, but you have a better personality
b. Not prettier, but definitely thinner
c. Not as pretty as you when you were her age
d. Define pretty
e. Sorry what did you say ? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.
Question # 5: What would you do if I died? A definite no-win question.(The real answer, of course, is "Buy a Lotus and a Boat").
No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions, usually along the these lines:
WOMAN: Would you get married again?
MAN: Definitely not!
WOMAN: Why not - don't you like being married?
MAN: Of course I do.
WOMAN: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
MAN: Okay, I'd get married again.
WOMAN: You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)
MAN: (makes audible groan)
WOMAN: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
MAN: Where else would we sleep?
WOMAN: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
MAN: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
WOMAN: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
MAN: She can't use them; she's left-handed.
WOMAN: - - - silence - - -
MAN: Sh&%.
-
It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty.
He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. "No" says the neighbor. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?"
The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley Cup we haven't been to together since we got married."
"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. That's terrible... But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?" The man shakes his head. "No,” he says. “They're all at the funeral."
-
@Lord Kratos I am sorry but I have to delete your joke. It is way too perverted.
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lord kratooooos
u r seriously the joke master,,thts ur new nickname!!!
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@Lord Kratos I am sorry but I have to delete your joke. It is way too perverted.
oops, sorry dude. :( The joke was listed as a +15 joke, so I thought it would be safe to post it. :-\
Sorry, won't happen again. :'(
-
Here's another. ;D
Last time, I had posted the piss joke, this time its the poo joke :P I hope its not perverted. :P
Poo :P
The Ghost Poo:
The kind where you feel poo come out, see poo on the toilet paper, but there's no poo in the bowl.
The Clean poo:
The kind where you feel poo come out, see poo in the bowl, but there's no poo on the toilet paper.
The Wet Poo:
You wipe your butt fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So yo end up putting toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.
The Wet Cheeks Poo:
That's the kind that comes out of your butt so fast that your butt cheeks get splashed with the toilet water, or splash-back.
The Second Wave Poo:
This poo happens when you think you've finished, your pants are up to your knees, and you suddenly realize you have to poo some more.
The Brain Haemorrage-through-your-nose Poo:
You have to strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have a stroke.
The Lincoln Log Log-
The kind of poo that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.
The Power Dump Poo:
The kind that comes out so fast, you've barely got your pants down and you're done.
The Liquid Plumber Poo:
This kind of poo is so big it plugs up the toilet and it overflows all over the floor. You should have followed the advice from the Lincoln Log Poo.
The Spinal Tap Poo:
The kind of poo that hurts so much coming out, you'd swear it's got to be coming out sideways.
The 'I-think-I'm-turning-into-a-bunny' Poo:
When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like marbles and make tiny splishy sounds when they hit the water.
The 'What-the-hell-died-in-here' Poo:
Also sometimes referred to as The Toxic Dump. Of course you don't warn anyone of the poisonous bathroom odor. Instead, you stand innocently near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for air.
The 'I-just-know-there's-a-turd-still-dangling-there' Poo:
Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last cling-on to drop.
-
hahahaha
it made me laugh and think ewwwwwwww at the same time
-
haha lol
funny i liked these a lot
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Good to see girls back on this thread. :P I thought u all had run away. ::) :P Don't know why. ::) :P
-
Here's another. ;D
Last time, I had posted the piss joke, this time its the poo joke :P I hope its not perverted. :P
Poo :P
The Ghost Poo:
The kind where you feel poo come out, see poo on the toilet paper, but there's no poo in the bowl.
The Clean poo:
The kind where you feel poo come out, see poo in the bowl, but there's no poo on the toilet paper.
The Wet Poo:
You wipe your butt fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So yo end up putting toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.
The Wet Cheeks Poo:
That's the kind that comes out of your butt so fast that your butt cheeks get splashed with the toilet water, or splash-back.
The Second Wave Poo:
This poo happens when you think you've finished, your pants are up to your knees, and you suddenly realize you have to poo some more.
The Brain Haemorrage-through-your-nose Poo:
You have to strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have a stroke.
The Lincoln Log Log-
The kind of poo that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.
The Power Dump Poo:
The kind that comes out so fast, you've barely got your pants down and you're done.
The Liquid Plumber Poo:
This kind of poo is so big it plugs up the toilet and it overflows all over the floor. You should have followed the advice from the Lincoln Log Poo.
The Spinal Tap Poo:
The kind of poo that hurts so much coming out, you'd swear it's got to be coming out sideways.
The 'I-think-I'm-turning-into-a-bunny' Poo:
When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like marbles and make tiny splishy sounds when they hit the water.
The 'What-the-hell-died-in-here' Poo:
Also sometimes referred to as The Toxic Dump. Of course you don't warn anyone of the poisonous bathroom odor. Instead, you stand innocently near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for air.
The 'I-just-know-there's-a-turd-still-dangling-there' Poo:
Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last cling-on to drop.
dude ur like lord of the jokes
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hahaha lord (l) :-*
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dude ur like lord of the jokes
Thank u. ;D
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hahaha lord (l) :-*
NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! THAT IS SO GAYYYYYYYY!!!!! :-[ :-* :P jk
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hahahaha.....gr8 jokes Lord Kratos :D :D :D
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I found this awesome site with lots of dirty awesome jokes for u man ;D i will look for the link :P Right now m busy and can't post :S
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I found this awesome site with lots of dirty awesome jokes for u man ;D i will look for the link :P Right now m busy and can't post :S
I have found lots of sites with awesome dirty jokes too :P, but can't post it here dude. ::)
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I have found lots of sites with awesome dirty jokes too :P, but can't post it here dude. ::)
Good boy. :P
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Good boy. :P
Cause most of them aren't for kids ::) only for 18+ :P
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Lets start posting funny pics.. maybe start a topic for it...
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Lets start posting funny pics.. maybe start a topic for it...
I have one :P, But I can't post the image here because it might be offending. Here's the link.
http://i973.photobucket.com/albums/ae215/coolprakan/395477724lrc9.jpg (http://i973.photobucket.com/albums/ae215/coolprakan/395477724lrc9.jpg)
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dat mite b a good topic wid genuine funny pics ;D
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I have one :P, But I can't post the image here because it might be offending. Here's the link.
http://i973.photobucket.com/albums/ae215/coolprakan/395477724lrc9.jpg (http://i973.photobucket.com/albums/ae215/coolprakan/395477724lrc9.jpg)
lol nice one ;D
heres another link for some funny pics (from my site)
http://mohitcrackmaster.page.tl/Funny-Pictures.htm
By the way my site is not fully updated only the jokes and funny pics r done :P ;)
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lol nice one ;D
heres another link for some funny pics (from my site)
http://mohitcrackmaster.page.tl/Funny-Pictures.htm
By the way my site is not fully updated only the jokes and funny pics r done :P ;)
hahaaahaaaaa, lol pringles, mcdonalds!!!! :D :D.
Awesome site u got there mohit. ;)
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nw im curious....ill check it out asap ;D
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hahaaahaaaaa, lol pringles, mcdonalds!!!! :D :D.
Awesome site u got there mohit. ;)
Thanks...lol.. ;D ;) :P
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Guys check out this link. ;) I found it today.
It contains the funniest exam answers written by students around the world. :P
http://www.masalatime.com/?p=419 (http://www.masalatime.com/?p=419)
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great stuff Lord!!! ;D
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Thank you Q80BOY ;D. Long time no see. :)
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Hey guys :), heres one:
Rodney the rooster
This farmer has a bunch of hens that are not producing many
eggs. So one morning he goes out and buys a young horny rooster
in an effort to get his hens back into an egg laying mood.
He names him Rodney. Well that first day Rodney lays every hen
on the farm and at the end of the day the farmer finds Rodney
trying to make it with his horse. The farmer walks over to Rodney
and says "You've gotta slow down or you're going to kill yourself!"
The next day Rodney lays every hen again, and at the end of
the day the farmer finds the rooster now trying to make it
with his cow. The farmer walks over to Rodney and says "I told you, you better slow down or you're going to kill yourself."
The following morning Rodney lays every hen again, but this time,
he lays all the other farm animals as well. The farmer finds
all his animals passed out from exhaustion.
In the middle of all his animals is Rodney, laying with his legs
sticking straight up in the air and buzzards circling over head.
The farmer walks up to Rodney and says "See, I told you if you
didn't slow down, you'd kill yourself." Rodney opens one eye,
looks at the farmer and says, "Shhh, buzzards."
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All of you guys will be killed by me. :P I'll make sure ur death painless :P :P
EL TORO ::)
A big Texan stopped at a local restaurant following a day roaming around in Mexico.
While sipping his tequila, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful. He asked the waiter, 'What is that you just served?'
The waiter replied, 'Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are called Cojones de Toro, bull's testicles from the bull fight this morning. A delicacy!'
The cowboy said, 'What the heck, bring me an order.'
The waiter replied, 'I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy.'
The next morning, the cowboy returned, placed his order, and that evening was served the one and only special delicacy of the day. After a few bites, inspecting his platter, he called to the waiter and said, 'These are delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday.'
The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, 'Si,Senor. Sometimes the bull wins.'
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For the ladies. :P
THE MULE ::)
An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From morning till night (and sometimes later), she was always complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule. He tried to plow a lot.
One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field. He drove the old mule into the shade, sat down on a stump, and began to eat his lunch. Immediately, his wife began haranguing him again. Complain, nag, nag; it just went on and on.
All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind feet; caught her smack in the back of the head. Killed her dead on the spot.
At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something rather odd, when a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a man mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake his head in disagreement. This was so consistent, the minister decided to ask the old farmer about it.
So after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer, and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but always shook his head and disagreed with all the men.
The old farmer said: "Well, the women would come up and say something about how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod my head in agreement."
"And what about the men?" the minister asked. "They wanted to know if the mule was for sale.
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Here's another one. :) But its not for the kids. You have been warned!!!! :P
You are sick mate.
Post modified- ~A.F~
i wonder what's this....
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Don't.
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Come on dude it wasn't that bad. There are some better ones which have been already posted here and were not modified.
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Drop it Kratos, dont get into a fight, it wont do any good. SHow me a link to the joke and let me see if it was truly THAT bad.
-
Did you read the joke that was deleted?
No, that's why I want to see the URL to the joke so I can determine if AF was justified in deleting it.
-
I'll pm it to u then.
Okay.
-
I'm still waiting ::)
-
For the ladies. :P
THE MULE ::)
An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From morning till night (and sometimes later), she was always complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule. He tried to plow a lot.
One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field. He drove the old mule into the shade, sat down on a stump, and began to eat his lunch. Immediately, his wife began haranguing him again. Complain, nag, nag; it just went on and on.
All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind feet; caught her smack in the back of the head. Killed her dead on the spot.
At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something rather odd, when a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a man mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake his head in disagreement. This was so consistent, the minister decided to ask the old farmer about it.
So after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer, and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but always shook his head and disagreed with all the men.
The old farmer said: "Well, the women would come up and say something about how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod my head in agreement."
"And what about the men?" the minister asked. "They wanted to know if the mule was for sale.
loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
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I'm still waiting ::)
You're supposed to be studying >:(
Not reading perverted jokes >:(
Kratos, you're not pming sh*t to him....get that >:(
-
To all moderators
The issue regarding the deletion of Kratos's joke by AF has been resolved. The matter is over.
-
Alright.;D
I am sorry guys. A.F. and Ari , I am truly sorry. Please forgive my mistakes. :(
-
1. Teacher: Can any one give me the name of a liquid that won't freeze? Amit: Hot water!
2. Doctor, doctor, everyone thinks I'm a liar. Doctor: I don't believe you.
3. Teacher asked George: How can you prove the earth is round? George replied: I can't! Besides, I never said it was.
4. Mother: How did you find school today? Daughter: I just got off the bus and there it was!
5. You're a high-priced lawyer! If I give you rs.500, will you answer two questions for me? 'Absolutely! what's the second question?'
6. Father: Doctor, my son swallowed a roll of film. Doctor: Let's wait and see what develops.
7. Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of. Student: Life imprisonment!
8. At night 2 drinkers were on their way, they saw moon's shadow in a pond. 1st:Hey, what is this? 2nd:It's Moon. 1st:Wow! We are on the moon!
9. Patient: Doctor, I couldn't stop stealing things. Doctor: Take these pills for a week. If they do not work, get me a colour TV.
10. Jai: The doctor said he would have me on my feet in 2 weeks. Sanju: And did he? Jai: Yes I had to sell my car to pay the bill.
11. Dad: Son, what do you want for your birthday gift? Son: Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.
12. Son: Dad, will you do my homework tonight? Father: No son, it wouldn't be right. Son: Well, you can try.
13. Customer: Waiter, I'd like to cancel my order for fresh fruit salad. Waiter: I am sorry sir, but the cook has already opened the tin.
14. Teacher: How old is your father? Sunny: As old as I am. Teacher: How is it possible? Sunny: He became father only after I was born.
15. Annoyed husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it. So I bought 3 movie tickets. Wife: why 3? Husband: For you and your parents.
16. Teacher: How do ants help us? One student answered quickly: They help us to know the place where our mother has kept the sweets.
17. Wife: Why are you wearing two coats to paint the house? Husband: Because it says on the box, put two coats for best results.
18. Son: I can't go to school today. Father: Why not? Son: I don't feel well. Father: Where don't you feel well? Son: In school!
19. Teacher: Is it your father's handwriting? Has your father done your homework? Rahul: Ma'am actually, I used my father's pen.
20. Patient: Doctor, I just can't stop my hands shaking! Doctor: Do you drink a lot? Patient: Not really, I spill most of it!
21. A teacher-student conversation! Teacher: What is a skeleton? Student: A person who started dieting but forgot to stop.
22. Teacher: Give me three reasons why the world is round? Mohit: Well, my dad says so, my mother says so and you say so!
23. Teacher: Why are you always late for school? Student: Because the peon always rings the bell before I got here!
24. Teacher: Kamal why didn't you do your homework. Kamal: I am staying in the hostel then how can I do my homework.
25. Two friends were going to work. Bunty: Shall we take a bus or walk? Sonu: Well, lets see what arrives first!
26. Teacher: I told you to stand at the end of the line! Little johny: I tried, but somebody was already there.
27. Jimmy to servant: Go and water the plants. Servant: It's raining. Jimmy: So what! Take an umbrella and go.
28. Teacher: Why are you late? Student: Sorry teacher, I over slept. Teacher: You need to sleep at home too!
29. Teacher: In this box, I have a 10-foot snake. Sunny: You can't fool me, I know snakes don't have feet.
30. Teacher: Could you please pay a little attention? Student: I'am paying as little attention as I can.
31. Girl: What is the height of flirting? Boy: It is when your love letter starts with,' To whom so ever it may concern'.
32. Nurse: Wake up man. Patient: What happen? Nurse: Nothing. I just forgot to give you prescribed sleeping pills.
33. Boy: I am asking you last time, will you marry me? Girl: I can't, I am engaged. Boy: Waiter, bill us separately.
34. Mother: Did you enjoy your first day at school? Kid: First day! Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow?
35. Teacher: Ramu, why do you always get so dirty? Ramu: Well, I am a lot closer to the ground than you are.
36. Girl: If you were my husband I'd poison your coffee. Boy: And if you were my wife, I'd drink it.
37. Boy asks his new girl friend: What sort of books you are interested in? Girlfriend: Cheque books.
38. Teacher: Sam, name one important thing that we have today but we didn't had it 10 years ago. Sam: Me.
39. Bunty: Can you do anything that other people can't? Rohan: Sure, I can read my handwriting.
40. Wife: Do you want dinner? Husband: Sure, what are the choices? Wife: Yes or No.
-
1. Teacher: Can any one give me the name of a liquid that won't freeze? Amit: Hot water!
2. Doctor, doctor, everyone thinks I'm a liar. Doctor: I don't believe you.
3. Teacher asked George: How can you prove the earth is round? George replied: I can't! Besides, I never said it was.
4. Mother: How did you find school today? Daughter: I just got off the bus and there it was!
5. You're a high-priced lawyer! If I give you rs.500, will you answer two questions for me? 'Absolutely! what's the second question?'
6. Father: Doctor, my son swallowed a roll of film. Doctor: Let's wait and see what develops.
7. Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of. Student: Life imprisonment!
8. At night 2 drinkers were on their way, they saw moon's shadow in a pond. 1st:Hey, what is this? 2nd:It's Moon. 1st:Wow! We are on the moon!
9. Patient: Doctor, I couldn't stop stealing things. Doctor: Take these pills for a week. If they do not work, get me a colour TV.
10. Jai: The doctor said he would have me on my feet in 2 weeks. Sanju: And did he? Jai: Yes I had to sell my car to pay the bill.
11. Dad: Son, what do you want for your birthday gift? Son: Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.
12. Son: Dad, will you do my homework tonight? Father: No son, it wouldn't be right. Son: Well, you can try.
13. Customer: Waiter, I'd like to cancel my order for fresh fruit salad. Waiter: I am sorry sir, but the cook has already opened the tin.
14. Teacher: How old is your father? Sunny: As old as I am. Teacher: How is it possible? Sunny: He became father only after I was born.
15. Annoyed husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it. So I bought 3 movie tickets. Wife: why 3? Husband: For you and your parents.
16. Teacher: How do ants help us? One student answered quickly: They help us to know the place where our mother has kept the sweets.
17. Wife: Why are you wearing two coats to paint the house? Husband: Because it says on the box, put two coats for best results.
18. Son: I can't go to school today. Father: Why not? Son: I don't feel well. Father: Where don't you feel well? Son: In school!
19. Teacher: Is it your father's handwriting? Has your father done your homework? Rahul: Ma'am actually, I used my father's pen.
20. Patient: Doctor, I just can't stop my hands shaking! Doctor: Do you drink a lot? Patient: Not really, I spill most of it!
21. A teacher-student conversation! Teacher: What is a skeleton? Student: A person who started dieting but forgot to stop.
22. Teacher: Give me three reasons why the world is round? Mohit: Well, my dad says so, my mother says so and you say so!
23. Teacher: Why are you always late for school? Student: Because the peon always rings the bell before I got here!
24. Teacher: Kamal why didn't you do your homework. Kamal: I am staying in the hostel then how can I do my homework.
25. Two friends were going to work. Bunty: Shall we take a bus or walk? Sonu: Well, lets see what arrives first!
26. Teacher: I told you to stand at the end of the line! Little johny: I tried, but somebody was already there.
27. Jimmy to servant: Go and water the plants. Servant: It's raining. Jimmy: So what! Take an umbrella and go.
28. Teacher: Why are you late? Student: Sorry teacher, I over slept. Teacher: You need to sleep at home too!
29. Teacher: In this box, I have a 10-foot snake. Sunny: You can't fool me, I know snakes don't have feet.
30. Teacher: Could you please pay a little attention? Student: I'am paying as little attention as I can.
31. Girl: What is the height of flirting? Boy: It is when your love letter starts with,' To whom so ever it may concern'.
32. Nurse: Wake up man. Patient: What happen? Nurse: Nothing. I just forgot to give you prescribed sleeping pills.
33. Boy: I am asking you last time, will you marry me? Girl: I can't, I am engaged. Boy: Waiter, bill us separately.
34. Mother: Did you enjoy your first day at school? Kid: First day! Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow?
35. Teacher: Ramu, why do you always get so dirty? Ramu: Well, I am a lot closer to the ground than you are.
36. Girl: If you were my husband I'd poison your coffee. Boy: And if you were my wife, I'd drink it.
37. Boy asks his new girl friend: What sort of books you are interested in? Girlfriend: Cheque books.
38. Teacher: Sam, name one important thing that we have today but we didn't had it 10 years ago. Sam: Me.
39. Bunty: Can you do anything that other people can't? Rohan: Sure, I can read my handwriting.
40. Wife: Do you want dinner? Husband: Sure, what are the choices? Wife: Yes or No.
hahahahaha :D :D
nice!!
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keep it up !
-
where are you kratos im missing your jokes :@
-
where are you kratos im missing your jokes :@
lol dude. ;D I was doing some physics papers. Boring sh*t. :P
Alright, here is one . ;)
THE LEXUS. :P
A very successful lawyer parked his brand new Lexus in front of the office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck came along too close to the curb and completely tore off the driver's door.
Fortunately, a cop in a police car was close enough to see the accident and pulled up behind the Lexus, his lights flashing.
But, before the cop had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically about how his Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter how the body shop tried to make it new again.
After the lawyer finally wound down from his rant, the cop shook his head in disgust and disbelief. "I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you neglect the most important things in life."
"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.
The cop replied, "Don't you even realize that your left arm is missing? It got ripped off when the truck hit you!!!"
"OH, MY GOD!" screamed the lawyer.
"My Rolex!!!"
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lol dude. ;D I was doing some physics papers. Boring sh*t. :P
Alright, here is one . ;)
THE LEXUS. :P
A very successful lawyer parked his brand new Lexus in front of the office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck came along too close to the curb and completely tore off the driver's door.
Fortunately, a cop in a police car was close enough to see the accident and pulled up behind the Lexus, his lights flashing.
But, before the cop had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically about how his Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter how the body shop tried to make it new again.
After the lawyer finally wound down from his rant, the cop shook his head in disgust and disbelief. "I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you neglect the most important things in life."
"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.
The cop replied, "Don't you even realize that your left arm is missing? It got ripped off when the truck hit you!!!"
"OH, MY GOD!" screamed the lawyer.
"My Rolex!!!"
lol i loved it!!!!!!
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k heres a blonde joke (no offense to any blonds is there are any)
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: ''I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!''
The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, ''You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee!''
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EVERYTHING'S BIG IN TEXAS. ::)
There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, "Wow, these seats are big!" The person next to him answered, "Everything is big in Texas."
When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!" The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas."
After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender replied, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident.
Scared to death, the blind man started shouting,
"Don't flush, don't flush!"
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k heres a blonde joke (no offense to any blonds is there are any)
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: ''I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!''
The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, ''You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee!''
Nooooooo!!! I was gonna post it next!!! :(
Bleh, :P then I'll post another one. :P
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Here's another. ;)
CHRISTMAS PARTY
Tom had been in the liquor business for 25 years.
Finally sick of the stress he quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in Alaska as far from humanity as possible.
He sees the postman once a week and gets groceries once a month. Otherwise it's total peace and quiet.
After six months or so of almost total isolation, someone knocks on his door. He opens it and a huge, bearded man is standing there.
"Name's Cliff, your neighbor from forty miles up the road. Having a Christmas party Friday night. Thought you might like to come. About 5:00."
"Great," says Tom. "After six months out here I'm ready to meet some local folks. Thank you."
As Cliff is leaving, he stops. "Gotta warn you.Gonna be some drinking."
"Not a problem" says Tom. "After 25 years in the business, I can drink with the best of 'em"
Again, the big man starts to leave and stops. "More 'n' likely gonna be some fightin' too."
"Well, I get along with people, I'll be all right. I'll be there. Thanks again."
"More 'n' likely gonna be some wild sex, too."
"Now that's really not a problem" says Tom, warming to the idea. "I've been all alone for six months! I'll definitely be there!!! By the way, what should I wear?"
"Don't much matter. Just gonna be the two of us."
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Something wrong with my ear.
Has it ever bothered you when the doctor's assistant asks you why you are here? Of course you feel compelled to answer, though you have to answer in front of total strangers in the lobby. Many times, your reason for being there can be quite embarrassing.
There's nothing worse than a doctor's receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it.
An 86 year old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk. The receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing doctor for today?"
"There's something wrong with my d*ck", he replied.
The receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that."
"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said.
The Receptionist replied, "Now you've caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the doctor in private."
The man replied, "You shouldn't ask people questions in a room full of strangers if the answers could embarrass anyone. The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.
The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes??"
"There's something wrong with my ear", he stated.
The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. "And what is wrong with your ear sir??"
"I can't piss out of it," he replied.
The waiting room erupted in laughter.
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Two men drove to a gas station for a fill-up because they heard about a contest being offered by the station to patrons who purchase a full tank of gas. When they went inside to pay, the men asked the attendant about the contest.
"If you win, you're entitled to free sex," said the attendant.
"How do we enter?" asked the first man.
"Well, I'm thinking of a number between 1-10, if you guess right, you win free sex."
"O.K. I guess 7, " said the first man.
"Sorry, I was thinking of 8," replied the attendant. "Come back soon and try again"
The next week, the two men returned to the same station to get gas. When they went inside to pay, the second man asked the attendant if the contest was still going on.
"Sure," replied the attendant. "I'm thinking of a number between 1-10, if you guess right. You win free sex."
"2" said the second man
"Sorry, I was thinking of 3," replied the attendant. "Come back soon and try again."
As they walked back to the car, the first man said to the second man,"You know, I'm beginning to think this contest is rigged."
"No way," said the second man. "My wife won twice last week."
So, Now I am cool or what guys? 8)
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Two men drove to a gas station for a fill-up because they heard about a contest being offered by the station to patrons who purchase a full tank of gas. When they went inside to pay, the men asked the attendant about the contest.
"If you win, you're entitled to free sex," said the attendant.
"How do we enter?" asked the first man.
"Well, I'm thinking of a number between 1-10, if you guess right, you win free sex."
"O.K. I guess 7, " said the first man.
"Sorry, I was thinking of 8," replied the attendant. "Come back soon and try again"
The next week, the two men returned to the same station to get gas. When they went inside to pay, the second man asked the attendant if the contest was still going on.
"Sure," replied the attendant. "I'm thinking of a number between 1-10, if you guess right. You win free sex."
"2" said the second man
"Sorry, I was thinking of 3," replied the attendant. "Come back soon and try again."
As they walked back to the car, the first man said to the second man,"You know, I'm beginning to think this contest is rigged."
"No way," said the second man. "My wife won twice last week."
So, Now I am cool or what guys? 8)
HAHAHAHAHA!!! NICE! :D :D :D
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Birthday Present
A wife decides to take her husband to a strip club for his birthday.
They arrive at the club and the doorman says, "Hey, Dave! How ya doin'?"
His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.
"Oh, no," says Dave. "He's on my bowling team."
When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.
His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,"How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"
"She's in the Ladies' Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them."
A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says "Hi Davey. Want your usual table dance, big boy?"
Dave's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book.
The cabby turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real b*tch tonight, Dave."
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3 nuns die
3 nuns die in a car crash and they go up to heaven and Peters at the gate and he says before you come in i'm afraid you will have to answer a question so he says to the first nun don't worry the questions are very easy so he asks what was the name of the first woman and she says Eve and he says yep your in then he says to the second nun where did eve live and she says Garden of eden and he said yep your in then he says to the third nun which was the mother superior i'm affraid the question is going to have to be a bit harder for you so he asks what did Eve say when she first saw Adam and the nun says ooh thats a hard one and peter says yep your in
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A psychotherapist, starting from scratch, was having such success in his business that he could now afford to have a proper shop banner advertising his wares. So he told a kid to paint the sign board for him and put it above his shop entrance.
But, instead of his business building up, it began to slacken. He had especially noticed the ladies shying away from his shop after reading the sign board. So he decided to check it out himself. Then he began to understand why!
The boy found a small wooden board so he had to split the word in 3 places.
The sign read:
Psycho-
the-
rapist.
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a bit sick but hilarious!!! :D
A doctor had the reputation of helping couples increase the joy in their sex life, but always promised not to take a case if he felt he could not help them. The Browns came to see the doctor, and he gave them thorough physical exams, psychological exams, and various tests and then concluded, "Yes, I am happy to say that I believe I can help you."
"On your way home from my office stop at the grocery store and buy some grapes and some doughnuts. Go home, take off your clothes, and you, sir, roll the grapes across the floor until you make a bulls eye in your wife's love canal. Then on hands and knees you must crawl to her like a leopard and retrieve the grape using only your tongue.
"Then next, ma'am, you must take the doughnuts and from across the room, toss them at your husband until you make a ringer around his love pole. Then like a lioness, you must crawl to him and consume the doughnut." The couple went home and their sex life became more and more wonderful.
They told their friends, Mr. & Mrs. Green that they should see the good doctor. The doctor greeted the Greens and said he would not take the case unless he felt that he could help them; so he conducted the physical exams and the same battery of tests.
Then he told the Greens the bad news. "I cannot help you, so I will not take your money. I believe your sex life is as good as it will ever be, I cannot help."
The Greens pleaded with him, and said, "You helped our friends the Browns, now please, please, help us."
"Well, all right", the doctor said. "On your way home from the office, stop at the grocery store and buy some apples and a box of cheerios... "
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lool im taking over lord kratos!!
A streetwalker was visiting her doctor for a regular check-up. "Any specific problems you should tell me about?" the doctor asked.
"Well, I have noticed lately that if I get even the tiniest cut, it seems to bleed for hours." she replied. "Do you think I might be a hemophiliac?"
"Well," the doctor answered, "Hemophilia is a genetic disorder and it is more often found in men, but it is possible for a woman to be a hemophiliac. Tell me, how much you lose when you have your period?" After calculating for a moment, the hooker replied, "Oh, about seven or eight hundred dollars, I guess."
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Morris walks into Dr. Cohen's office and puts a note on the table in front of the doctor. The note reads, "I can't talk. Please help me!"
The doctor thinks for a while and says to Morris, "Put your penis on the table here."
Morris thinks this is a bit weird, but Cohen is a specialist, so he does as the doctor says.
The doctor takes a rubber mallet and hits Morris's penis as hard as he can.
The man cries in great agony, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
The doctor says, "Good. Come again tomorrow, and we'll learn B!"
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NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Imma dying with laughter!!!! Seriously, loooooool :D
Nooooo, dodi, you are goiong to make me jobless!!! >:(
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OMG......damn hilarious :D :D but du u guyz actualy spend time searching 4 jokes? ???
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OMG......damn hilarious :D :D but du u guyz actualy spend time searching 4 jokes? ???
Jokes don't come on apple trees. :P Joking :P Yep, we've to search for it dude. ;)
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hahaha....i guessed dat im sure :P :D but du u guyz dat much of a free time
By the way....im a girl :D
but thnkz 4 da jokes --u guyz make my day atleast fun :)
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Right guys.
These jokes are sick, I'm sorry to say.
There will be no more dirty jokes posted here.
Thank you.
[/b][/color]
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In concurrence with what Roxy has said, I will now lock this topic.
You will be free to create a new Joke & Riddles thread with CLEAN JOKES
Sorry, guys, but we cant turn a blind eye anymore.
THANK YOU !
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In concurrence with what Roxy has said, I will now lock this topic.
You will be free to create a new Joke & Riddles thread with CLEAN JOKES
Sorry, guys, but we cant turn a blind eye anymore.
THANK YOU !
What?! :o This is my thread since last year!
It shall not be locked! I will unlock but they will just stop posting sick jokes.
This thread was the first in the whole forum to reach 1000 posts, 2000 posts and 3000 posts! It got many good jokes not only sick ones.
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Hey Ari, WHy is this thread still open? >:(
And here I thought that finally I was going to have my own jokes thread. :(
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Hey Ari, WHy is this thread still open? >:(
And here I thought that finally I was going to have my own jokes thread. :(
OVER MY DEAD BODY!
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
This thread shall remain forever the MAIN source of humor because it got a HIGH number of posts since like last year!
It should actually be made sticky! :P
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OVER MY DEAD BODY!
So where do you want your dead body? :P In the ceiling, or the top of the roof or in the garden with worms ? :P
Seriously, this thread is so old that no one bothers to read the first 250 pages. :P I started posting after that. :P
So why don't you throw this into the garbage bin and let me create a new thread? ::) :P
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So where do you want your dead body? :P In the ceiling, or the top of the roof or in the garden with worms ? :P
Seriously, this thread is so old that no one bothers to read the first 250 pages. :P I started posting after that. :P
So why don't you throw this into the garbage bin and let me create a new thread? ::) :P
:o Throw this in the garbage?!
If I did that humor board would have like 2000 posts only because it would be losing 5000 posts!
Anyone bored and needs a good laugh would flip over any of the pages in this thread and will surely find a joke there!
Just like 'Family' thread or 'Mood' threads which are hundreds of pages, we can't even move them to bin. ::)
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Kratos, go ahead & open a new tread...but make sure it haz only da best of da best...this will keep it short & entertaining ;)
Da rest v cud dump it hear, after all v need a garbage bin :P :P
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Kratos, go ahead & open a new tread...but make sure it haz only da best of da best...this will keep it short & entertaining ;)
Da rest v cud dump it hear, after all v need a garbage bin :P :P
:o :o :o even you!!!!!!!
OMG! :'( My thread :(
You people are so mean! :'(
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Da rest v cud dump it hear, after all v need a garbage bin :P :P
haahaahaaahaa. :D
hi5 immortal. ;)
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Ok,now i feel pity on Mony...Kratos der cud b a mor viable solution...because v shud not disregard one of da top treads ???
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Ok,now i feel pity on Mony...Kratos der cud b a mor viable solution...because v shud not disregard one of da top treads ???
:( :(
This thread have very nice memories its been there since May 26 2010.
Now people want it in the bin. =[
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Nope, I'm not asking you to throw it in the bin. You can leave it the way you want. It will remain forever in our memories.
I'm just saying, lets make a fresh start cause the thread was filled with disputes.
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Random Riddle
This old one runs forever, but never moves at all. He has not lungs nor throat, but still a mighty roaring call. What is it?
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Random Riddle
This old one runs forever, but never moves at all. He has not lungs nor throat, but still a mighty roaring call. What is it?
Waterfall
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Waterfall
loooooooooooool! Correct!
+rep is your prize.
Did you google it? :P or knew it from b4? or used ur very smart mind? :P
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:o wow! Your reputation increased with 5 points!
You have been blessed! :P
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haha thanks for blessing me mama! :P
And lol yeah..i knew it from before :P
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haha thanks for blessing me mama! :P
And lol yeah..i knew it from before :P
>:( >:( You knew it from before! >:(
Now I should've never given u 5 points! :o You cheater! You shouldve said 'i knew it from before please don't give a +rep because I don't deserve it, I need to solve a riddle first' >:(
You will have to answer all the coming 3 ones of else I will -rep you :P jk :P
Here is one for KG1 :P :
What word doesn't belong in this group?
that, hat, what, mat, cat, sat, pat, chat
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Solve this one also :
Two sentries were on duty outside a barracks. One faced up the road to watch for anyoe approaching from the North. The other looked down the road to see if anyone approached from the South. Suddenly one of them said to the other, "Why are you smiling?"
How did he know that his companion was smiling?
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Needs logic :
Mom, Dad, and 2 kids have come to a river, and they find a boat. It is small and can only carry one adult or 2 kids at a time. Both kids are good rowers, but how can the whole family reach the other side of the river?
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Solve this one also :
Two sentries were on duty outside a barracks. One faced up the road to watch for anyoe approaching from the North. The other looked down the road to see if anyone approached from the South. Suddenly one of them said to the other, "Why are you smiling?"
How did he know that his companion was smiling?
they were standing in a way that one is facing other? :-\
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What word doesn't belong in this group?
that, hat, what, mat, cat, sat, pat, chat
what? :P
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Both of you are correct!
I need to post more difficult riddles! >:(
Gimme few mins!
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>:( >:( You knew it from before! >:(
Now I should've never given u 5 points! :o You cheater! You shouldve said 'i knew it from before please don't give a +rep because I don't deserve it, I need to solve a riddle first' >:(
You will have to answer all the coming 3 ones of else I will -rep you :P jk :P
Here is one for KG1 :P :
What word doesn't belong in this group?
that, hat, what, mat, cat, sat, pat, chat
yeh.."what"
because the number of words are
4-3-4-3-3-3-3-4
so, ^ is odd.
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Solve this one also :
Two sentries were on duty outside a barracks. One faced up the road to watch for anyoe approaching from the North. The other looked down the road to see if anyone approached from the South. Suddenly one of them said to the other, "Why are you smiling?"
How did he know that his companion was smiling?
What if theyre facing each other? Like looking at each other, face to face. and each monitoring his area? :-\
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yeh.."what"
because the number of words are
4-3-4-3-3-3-3-4
so, ^ is odd.
no dude! what is pronounced in a different way! Thats all!
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no dude! what is pronounced in a different way! Thats all!
oh!...I didn't try saying it! :-[ :-[ :-X
but what is said is a valid reason too. :-\
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oh!...I didn't try saying it! :-[ :-[ :-X
but what is said is a valid reason too. :-\
Yes it is! :D
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LOL @nobdy..it was an easy riddle no need to think a lot about it :P
here is one!
I can give hints if you want :
The sun bakes them, the hand breaks them, the foot treads on them, and the mouth tastes them. What are they?
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LOL @nobdy..it was an easy riddle no need to think a lot about it :P
here is one!
I can give hints if you want :
The sun bakes them, the hand breaks them, the foot treads on them, and the mouth tastes them. What are they?
im guessing bread
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LOL @nobdy..it was an easy riddle no need to think a lot about it :P
here is one!
I can give hints if you want :
The sun bakes them, the hand breaks them, the foot treads on them, and the mouth tastes them. What are they?
I know it but won't post it. It would be cheating. :-X :) Hint:wine
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LOL @nobdy..it was an easy riddle no need to think a lot about it :P
here is one!
I can give hints if you want :
The sun bakes them, the hand breaks them, the foot treads on them, and the mouth tastes them. What are they?
The only thing we eat and foot treas on them--> grapes in making wine! right?
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The only thing we eat and foot treas on them--> grapes in making wine! right?
Correct :D
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AF wins again!!!
Yes grapes!
Okay another :
I'm named after nothing, though I'm awfully clamorous. And when I'm not working, your house is less glamorous. What am I?
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I'm named after nothing, though I'm awfully clamorous. And when I'm not working, your house is less glamorous. What am I?
That was an easy one. The answer is Vacuum Cleaner.
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AF wins again!!!
Yes grapes!
Okay another :
I'm named after nothing, though I'm awfully clamorous. And when I'm not working, your house is less glamorous. What am I?
nothing ==> Vacuum
so, vacuum cleaner? or a vacuum pump? :-\
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nothing ==> Vacuum
so, vacuum cleaner? or a vacuum pump? :-\
I answered that first, so that makes me the winner. YAY! LOL :D :D :D
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Are the jokes THAT easy? LOL -_-
DrEvil got it right first. I will +rep you later or let me try now :P
Easy one :
When the day after tomorrow is yesterday, today will be as far from Wednesday as today was from Wednesday when the day before yesterday was tomorrow. What is the day after this day?
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I answered that first, so that makes me the winner. YAY! LOL :D :D :D
Okay your reputation was was 85 now it is 89.! You have been blessed :P
@Nobody I'll +rep u also
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Okay your reputation was was 85 now it is 89.! You have been blessed :P
LOL...THANKS! ;D ;D
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LOL...THANKS! ;D ;D
I wouldn't mind if you give me some of your love :P I have a blue heart down there :P
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Are the jokes THAT easy? LOL -_-
DrEvil got it right first. I will +rep you later or let me try now :P
Easy one :
When the day after tomorrow is yesterday, today will be as far from Wednesday as today was from Wednesday when the day before yesterday was tomorrow. What is the day after this day?
today is saturday
the day after is sunday
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today is saturday
the day after is sunday
Think again :P
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Easy one :
When the day after tomorrow is yesterday, today will be as far from Wednesday as today was from Wednesday when the day before yesterday was tomorrow. What is the day after this day?
Yes, that indeed was an easy one. The answer is SUNDAY. (Although not sure about it. :-\) :-X
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Yes, that indeed was an easy one. The answer is SUNDAY. (Although not sure about it. :-\) :-X
Wrong :P
everyone +rep me when u get a wrong answer :P jk :P
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I wouldn't mind if you give me some of your love :P I have a blue heart down there :P
I already gave you some of my love. Check it out, its now 235 from 233. ;) ;)
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I already gave you some of my love. Check it out, its now 235 from 233. ;) ;)
Yay! thx! :D
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Wrong :P
everyone +rep me when u get a wrong answer :P jk :P
The answer is Sunday.
When the day after tomorrow is yesterday is 3 days from now;
When the day before yesterday was tomorrow is 3 days ago;
For 3 days from now and 3 days ago to be the same distance from Sunday, it has to be Sunday. :-\
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The answer is 'Thursday'.
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The answer is 'Thursday'.
How come? ??? ???
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How come? ??? ???
I don't get the whole riddle tbh so don't ask me. :P
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I don't get the whole riddle tbh so don't ask me. :P
Trust me, the answer is Sunday. Read the explanation below:
The answer is Sunday.
When the day after tomorrow is yesterday is 3 days from now;
When the day before yesterday was tomorrow is 3 days ago;
For 3 days from now and 3 days ago to be the same distance from Sunday, it has to be Sunday.
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Thanks for +rep
and the answer is... Saturday?
it's equal from Wednesday.
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idk but this is the answer there Drevil :-\
Anyways here is a nice one :
A mother gave birth to twin boys, but they were born in different years and on different days. And no, the boys are not part of 2 sets. How can this be possible?
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I wouldn't mind if you give me some of your love :P I have a blue heart down there :P
woho!
I would suerly give you somw love, but it says below your dp "-No Love-" :P
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idk but this is the answer there Drevil :-\
Anyways here is a nice one :
A mother gave birth to twin boys, but they were born in different years and on different days. And no, the boys are not part of 2 sets. How can this be possible?
one was born on 31 december, at 23:59 and another at 1 January 0:01 8)
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A mother gave birth to twin boys, but they were born in different years and on different days. And no, the boys are not part of 2 sets. How can this be possible?
That was the easiest one. I had been asked this riddle for ages.
One was born on December 31 at 11:53 p.m. and the other on January 1 at 12:07 a.m.
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woho!
I would suerly give you somw love, but it says below your dp "-No Love-" :P
I +repped you, your reputation increased by 5 points unlike Drevil by only 4 points :-\
So from 58 u r now 63 :P You have been blessed :P :P
looooooooooool hahaha. Well, I shall remove -No Love- then :P
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one was born on 31 december, at 23:59 and another at 1 January 0:01 8)
Right answer!
Another easy :
A new medical building containing 100 offices had just been completed. Dave was hired to paint the numbers 1 to 100 on the doors. How many times will Dave have to paint the number nine?
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I +repped you, your reputation increased by 5 points unlike Drevil by only 4 points :-\
That is so unfair. LOL (jk) ;D ;D
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That is so unfair. LOL (jk) ;D ;D
wait! it increased by 5 also! It was 85 now it is 90! :D
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wait! it increased by 5 also! It was 85 now it is 90! :D
Well that was because reputation increases with posts. ;D
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Right answer!
Another easy :
A new medical building containing 100 offices had just been completed. Dave was hired to paint the numbers 1 to 100 on the doors. How many times will Dave have to paint the number nine?
I think 10 times. :-\ :-\
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Well that was because reputation increases with posts. ;D
oh -_- so it only increased by 4. ::)
No not 10 times..u need to write them down I guess to know how many times
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Right answer!
Another easy :
A new medical building containing 100 offices had just been completed. Dave was hired to paint the numbers 1 to 100 on the doors. How many times will Dave have to paint the number nine?
2 kids row first 2 other side
1 kid gets back & dad gets in..
wen dad in da other side,gets down, da other kid rows back again..
den both da kids row 2 meet dad..
den i kid returns so mum cn go 2 other side..
wen mon goes other side.da kid comes back 2 pick up his bro..
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2 kids row first 2 other side
1 kid gets back & dad gets in..
wen dad in da other side,gets down, da other kid rows back again..
den both da kids row 2 meet dad..
den i kid returns so mum cn go 2 other side..
wen mon goes other side.da kid comes back 2 pick up his bro..
I guess you meant the other riddle..LOL.
Yeah answer is right, I will +rep u! :D
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Mony.by any chance r u competing wit Kratos :D
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Mony.by any chance r u competing wit Kratos :D
oh yeah :P I am showing that I don't need his dirty jokes to make this thread alive. I can make it alive myself! :P
It increased by like 4-5 pages until now :P
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the answer to the last one is 20 times
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Right answer!
Another easy :
A new medical building containing 100 offices had just been completed. Dave was hired to paint the numbers 1 to 100 on the doors. How many times will Dave have to paint the number nine?
remove that -No love-
20 times 9
9, 19, 29, 39, 49, 59, 69, 79, 89, 90,
91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99
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the answer to the last one is 20 times
Answer:
Did you say 9 times? WRONG - Twenty times.
9, 19, 29 ,39, 49, 59 ,69, 79 ,89, 90, 91, 92 ,93 ,94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99
You got it right sis! :D
Now I have to +rep many people!!!!!!
@Choc.Kits,,nopes..nice try! Keep posting though :D
@Nobody..but -No Love- is me. Everyone calls me that because I reject guys :P
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here is a riddle:
Ryan's only sister's husband's only mother-in-law's
only husband's mother met Ryan in the store.
What relation is she to Ryan?
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His grandmother from his father's side! ;)
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:o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
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I'll help Mony & the one now,
answer this!
it's easy..
John is trapped in a room. The room has only two possible exits: two doors. Through the first door
there is a room constructed from magnifying glass. The blazing hot sun instantly fries anything or
anyone that enters. Through the second door there is a fire-breathing dragon. How does john escape?
-
:o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
Spam! >:(
-
:o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
hahaha..u scared now..
-
His grandmother from his father's side! ;)
thts correct
-
:o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
SPAM! :-X
-
I'll help Mony & the one now,
answer this!
it's easy..
John is trapped in a room. The room has only two possible exits: two doors. Through the first door
there is a room constructed from magnifying glass. The blazing hot sun instantly fries anything or
anyone that enters. Through the second door there is a fire-breathing dragon. How does john escape?
he opens the first door but doesnt enter,then opens the second door and leads the dragon into the first door,the dragon gets roasted and he leaves through the second door
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He leaves at night ,first door.....is it..dats wat i wud do
its also possible 4 da floor 2 b hot..so i wud hve 2 wear smething..mayb dragon skin
-
hey, how come my thread has just one reply? :(
-
He leaves at night ,first door.....is it..dats wat i wud do
Correct.
You win a -rep as a present from me! >:D >:D
okay..i'll +rep you! ;) Keep posting.
-
Correct.
You win a -rep as a present from me! >:D >:D
okay..i'll +rep you! ;) Keep posting.
hey wht bout my answer i think its rite 2
-
this is going out of control..ppl r going +Rep crazy >:D
@kratos, isnt revenge sweet
-
hey, how come my thread has just one reply? :(
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! People were NOT posting much in this thread now after you dumping it in the bin and me coming back here it gets alive :P
Meh..I will post in ur dead thread though but you need to +rep me first :P jk :P i will post there ::)
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no, the answer 2 is wrong.
The floor can't be hot. :)
One more..easy!
There was a poor women, and the only food she had for her eleven children was six potatoes.
How did she make sure that each child had an equal share?
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this is going out of control..ppl r going +Rep crazy >:D
@kratos, isnt revenge sweet
Your reputation power went up by 2 ....13 to 15!
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no, the answer 2 is wrong.
The floor can't be hot. :)
One more..easy!
There was a poor women, and the only food she had for her eleven children was six potatoes.
How did she make sure that each child had an equal share?
she cut the six potatoes in half gave the halfs to her children and ate the remaining half
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What da heck kinda revenge is this? >:( >:(
This is unfair!!!!!! >:( >:( I mean she's going to +rep people for just answering simple riddles :P and the + rep boosts rep by 5 points!!!!! She's cheating!!!! Everybody's gonna come over here for that +rep. >:(
AAARRRGGGH!!! >:( UNFAIR!!!!! >:( >:(
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What da heck kinda revenge is this? >:( >:(
This is unfair!!!!!! >:( >:( I mean she's going to +rep people for just answering simple riddles :P and the + rep boosts rep by 5 points!!!!! She's cheating!!!! Everybody's gonna come over here for that +rep. >:(
AAARRRGGGH!!! >:( UNFAIR!!!!! >:( >:(
:P :P
*sticks tongue out*
:P
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she cut the six potatoes in half gave the halfs to her children and ate the remaining half
wrong, she has to give them every bit of the food.
(http://www.wsc.ma.edu/personalpages/draker/edcom/final/webprojects/fa08/buddy/answer_try_again.jpg)
And +rep is not compulsory.
It's up to the question asker to give +rep.
-
:P :P
*sticks tongue out*
:P
AARRRGGGHHH!!!! >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(
I WANT BLOOOD!!!!!!!!!! >:( >:( >:(
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AARRRGGGHHH!!!! >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(
I WANT BLOOOD!!!!!!!!!! >:( >:( >:(
*Jumps around from happiness*
:P :P This is what you get from messing with the cat lady. :P
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*Jumps around from happiness*
:P :P This is what you get from messing with the cat lady. :P
Arrrrgghhh!!! MUAHAHAHAAAA >:D >:D I have an idea. ::)
I am going to deep fry some street cats and send them to you!!!!! >:D >:D >:D
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@nobody
she mashed the potatoes and used a spoon :)
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@nobody
she mashed the potatoes and used a spoon :)
good...correct.
now another one.
===
What are the next two letters in the series and how?
W A T N T L I T S ? ?
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a and w
cause the next two words start with a and w ;D
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a and w
cause the next two words start with a and w ;D
Caught!
I edited the question, it's not directly from the source. :P
You seared it on internet..right!
and wrong answer..
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Caught!
I edited the question, it's not directly from the source. :P
You seared it on internet..right!
and wrong answer..
haha lol!!!!
oopps!! dont get me wrong iwasnt doin it for the reps
i was just tryin to look smart :-[
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it's okay...theone!
still...use your brain & answer it!
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haha lol!!!!
oopps!! dont get me wrong iwasnt doin it for the reps
i was just tryin to look smart :-[
HAHAHAHAHA! We used to do that last year when asnwering riddles! :P
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a and w
cause the next two words start with a and w ;D
soo its gonna be a and h
-
soo its gonna be a and h
correct now! ;)
-
correct now! ;)
but...how?
-
but...how?
What are the next two letters in the series and how?
W A T N T L I T S ? ?
Each word is the first letter of every word of the question.
What = W
are = A
the = T
next = N
two = T
leters = L
in = I
the = T
series = S
and = A
how = H
That's how you get the results. :)
-
=.=
Sorry Kimo. Have to remove this, its considered SPAM. Add some text next time ;)
-
Tis thread dead. :P
-
This tread overheated,Thanks 2 da efforts of mony...this led 2 its downfall :P :P
Wat goes up will eventually find its way down..
-
Tis thread dead. :P
This thread became dead once I stopped posting in it!
I had an exam so I didn't have time, but wait till I make it alive again :P Isa.
-
What is as big as you are and yet does not weigh anything?
Easy one :P
-
:D SHADOW!! ;D
-
:D SHADOW!! ;D
LOL! YESH! :D I will +rep you although it was super easy :P
here is another :
2 fathers and 2 sons go fishing. Each of them catches one fish. So why do they bring home only 3 fishes?
-
because there are only 3 ppl! One Grandpa-his son (also a father!) and his son!
My these riddles are easy!!
-
These questions are so dumb. Whose are they? ::)
-
because there are only 3 ppl! One Grandpa-his son (also a father!) and his son!
My these riddles are easy!!
LOL. Let me get some tougher ones!
If you throw me from the window,
I will leave a grieving wife.
Bring me back, but in the door, and
You'll see someone giving life!
What am I?
-
No!! Sheesh I give up :( I'll leave it so some brainiac can answer!!
-
Give me a moment to think! :o
LOOOOOOOOL. Not that hard :P
-
The letter N, :P
wiNdow=widow
door=doNor
Crap questions. ::)
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The letter N, :P
wiNdow=widow
door=doNor
Crap questions. ::)
Ok, right. If you don't like them, then no need to post here. =]
here is another! What is the word that has 1 syllable, but when you add 1 letter to the end, it becomes 3 syllables?
-
A politician wrote a long speech. How did it help his career even before he gave the speech?
-
Ok, right. If you don't like them, then no need to post here. =]
here is another! What is the word that has 1 syllable, but when you add 1 letter to the end, it becomes 3 syllables?
I know this one but forgot!!!!! >:( >:( something to do with r. >:( >:(
AARRGGHH!!!!! >:(
-
Ok, right. If you don't like them, then no need to post here. =]
here is another! What is the word that has 1 syllable, but when you add 1 letter to the end, it becomes 3 syllables?
are-area ;D
-
are-area ;D
I was going to answer that!!!! >:( I already knew it had something to do with r. >:(
-
are-area ;D
You knew it from before..? ::) :P
-
You knew it from before..? ::) :P
Ye-o :P
-
You knew it from before..? ::) :P
Where is my +rep ? ::)
-
@AF, what does Ye-o stands for? ::)
@Kratos, I don't love you so why give you ANY of my love..?
-
@Kratos, I don't love you so why give you ANY of my love..?
+ rep isn't loving. ::)
By the way, you said you'd +rep the answerer. I answered one didn't I? ::)
Now GIVE IT TO ME!!!!!!! :P :P :P :P
-
@AF, what does Ye-o stands for? ::)
Yes/no
-
Another riddle.
You can produce the sound of two cheeks farting. Now, how does one cheek sound?
-
I wouldnt know; maybe you could tell us since you have experience in such things given your weird anatomy :P
-
I wouldnt know; maybe you could tell us since you have experience in such things given your weird anatomy :P
LOL Ari. You crack me up! :D
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I wouldnt know; maybe you could tell us since you have experience in such things given your weird anatomy :P
Kids like you should be in your books.
You wouldn't know a thing about zen. ::)
Also,From my book of Really Gross Facts: "The longest recorded fart lasted 2 minutes and 42 seconds". Last week I wouldn't have been able to supply this vital information. Someone brought me it back from holiday (why, I don't know).
Bonus fact(?): "If one person farted continually for 81 months they would produce the same amount of energy as a nuclear bomb".
Bonus bonus fact: "women fart 3 times more during the day than men".
-
@Kratos Extra-Bonus-Bonus Fact : Kratos is a pervert who farts and collects the gas so that he can cook with it :P
Actually I am going to refrain from posting about this stuff anymore - its below my dignity
-
@Kratos Extra-Bonus-Bonus Fact : Kratos is a pervert who farts and collects the gas so that he can cook with it :P
dignity
And you eat your meal with that collected gas as air freshner . :P
its below my dignity
:o :o :o :o :o You have dignity? :o :o :o :o :o ::) ::) :P
-
Stop spoiling my thread with farts talks ::)
-
Stop spoiling my thread with farts talks ::)
You are the biggest one here. ::) Remember how loud you fart? ::) :P
-
You are the biggest one here. ::) Remember how loud you fart? ::) :P
Yes right. I don't even eat a lot shows how much I will fart.
Talk about yourself dude first.
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Yes right. I don't even eat a lot shows how much I will fart.
Talk about yourself dude first.
HAHAHAH mony got pissed!
-
HAHAHAH mony got pissed!
-_- sa5an sa5an ::) :P
LOL. I find it funny tbh but I hate kratos s I don't like showing that I am laughing at his lame jokes.
-
Yes right. I don't even eat a lot shows how much I will fart.
Talk about yourself dude first.
@Kratos You just got pwned by a Admin !!! LOL !!!
-
I don't even eat a lot shows how much I will fart.
And how do I know THAT? ::)
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I don't need to prove myself to you. Sorry to say this, but you don't matter in my life.
Those who know me, knows how I look like and that I don't have loud farts :P like you.
-
@Kratos You just got pwned by a Admin !!! LOL !!!
Stalker. ::)
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I don't need to prove myself to you. Sorry to say this, but you don't matter in my life.
Yeah. ::) By now, you must have even bought the fartometer. ::)
Those who know me, knows how I look like and that I don't have loud farts :P like you.
And how will they know if you always fart alone in your room? ::) Like BOOOOOOOOM!!!!!! :P
-
LOL, as I said, you don't matter to me so think whatever you wanna think. =]
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I don't need to prove myself to you. Sorry to say this, but you don't matter in my life.
Those who know me, knows how I look like and that I don't have loud farts :P like you.
shoshou ...law kint fimakanik kint min ilbidaya saweet 6aaf!! ;D ;D ;D ;D
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LOL, as I said, you don't matter to me so think whatever you wanna think. =]
HARSH !!!!
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LOL, as I said, you don't matter to me so think whatever you wanna think. =]
likewise. ::)
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shoshou ...law kint fimakanik kint min ilbidaya saweet 6aaf!! ;D ;D ;D ;D
Ya3ni eh 6aaf? :P
-
LOL...This is funny :P
-
likewise. ::)
BURN !!!!! Nice comeback Kratos :P
-
Ya3ni eh 6aaf? :P
it means inu a6anishi
-
looool kratos +rep
ur a joker man!!!!!
-
Thanks dodi. ;D You are kind to +rep me.
Look how low it is. :(
-
it means inu a6anishi
LOL..da eli ana 3amalto aslan :P
hahahahaha.
-
LOL..da eli ana 3amalto aslan :P
hahahahaha.
bas mish min ilbidaya 8) lol :D
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LOL..da eli ana 3amalto aslan :P
hahahahaha.
Lesh ?
-
bas mish min ilbidaya 8) lol :D
looooool. ya3ni almost men el badia :P
I like ur dps. Do you watch anime?
@Ari lesh what? :P
-
Ana Bayt kabeeyr. :P
-
Ana Bayt kabeeyr. :P
hahahahhaha! seriously? awwwwwwwwwww thats cute! :D LOOOOOL!
How much you weight now then? :P
-
looooool. ya3ni almost men el badia :P
I like ur dps. Do you watch anime?
@Ari lesh what? :P
thx mate ;).... i used to but now i am too busy + i don't kno any gd ones which r short abt 24 episodes to watch ......could u recommend smthn like that? :-X
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thx mate ;).... i used to but now i am too busy + i don't kno any gd ones which r short abt 24 episodes to watch ......could u recommend smthn like that? :-X
I know many. Which did you watch time?
I <33333 Vampire Knight! It got 3 seasons. kol season fir 12-13 episodes only bas its awesome!
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I know many. Which did you watch time?
I <33333 Vampire Knight! It got 3 seasons. kol season fir 12-13 episodes only bas its awesome!
i only watched the first season only and i got soo hooked up lol......i kept on repeatin some episodes lol ...
i watched also smthn called Special A....it's one of my favs ....i also watched his and her circumstances ...and so goes on the list ......hbu ? ..tell me sond gd one which r short lol ?
-
hahahahhaha! seriously? awwwwwwwwwww thats cute! :D LOOOOOL!
How much you weight now then? :P
I said : 'my house is big' -_- Where did my weight come into this ??
-
I said : 'my house is big' -_- Where did my weight come into this ??
hahahaaha LMAO ....ROFL....hahahaahahah i can't stop laughin ;D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
-
I said : 'my house is big' -_- Where did my weight come into this ??
LOOOOOL. No! You said 'ana bayt kabeer'
ana = I
bayt is similar to ba2at(become)
so You can't say I big house ::) i thought u meant I am big now :P
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LOOOOOL. No! You said 'ana bayt kabeer'
ana = I
bayt is similar to ba2at(become)
so You can't say I big house ::) i thought u meant I am big now :P
ya shoshou , yadubu ya3rif 3arabi lisa 7ayi3rif masri lol
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i only watched the first season only and i got soo hooked up lol......i kept on repeatin some episodes lol ...
i watched also smthn called Special A....it's one of my favs ....i also watched his and her circumstances ...and so goes on the list ......hbu ? ..tell me sond gd one which r short lol ?
ohhhhh ya3ni u didn't like Vampire knight? =/
Death Note is 37 eposides but good one.
Special A..yeah heard of it...if u recommend it I;ll download it!
-
loooool love the way u guyz change topics so fast...the topic wz supposed 2 b about jokes nd riddles but u guyz r the biggest joke..lol :P :P
-
NANCY AJRAM FOR LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D :P
-
ya shoshou , yadubu ya3rif 3arabi lisa 7ayi3rif masri lol
HAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!! Yes right bas I am Egyptian so my mind thinks in an egyptian way :P
@dodi..LOL. How r u doing?
@ARI -_- I like her. You llisten to Tamer Hosny? :P
-
NANCY AJRAM FOR LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D :P
i don't like her at all .......................... lol .. i thought u'd say that lol :P
-
ohhhhh ya3ni u didn't like Vampire knight? =/
Death Note is 37 eposides but good one.
Special A..yeah heard of it...if u recommend it I;ll download it!
la2 i lyked it but i didn't kno it had 3 seasons that's all :) .......... k i'll see , even my friend recommended that too lol .........ya sure thing , i do recommend it ! :D
-
Who's this mascara Tamer ?
Nancy is too Kewl !!
@golden girl HATER !!!!!
LoL ! I dont even understand what shes saying :P
-
Ari you honestly crack me up every time you say a word.
-
gd soo this thread is coming bak to lyf!!
howz evry1s summer goin??
loool h8 most of the arabic songs they r soo silly!!
-
Who's this mascara Tamer ?
Nancy is too Kewl !!
@golden girl HATER !!!!!
LoL ! I dont even understand what shes saying :P
no i'm not it's just that she's not nice/cool in MY eyes ....everyone has a different opinion ,right? 8)
i didn't get ur last sentence ???
dodi: ...i kno!!!...eng is more fun ::) ::) ::) 8) 8) :D
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gd soo this thread is coming bak to lyf!!
howz evry1s summer goin??
loool h8 most of the arabic songs they r soo silly!!
Yeah, Arabic songs are so....... last season !!! :P
Ari you honestly crack me up every time you say a word.
What ? When I speak your lingo or when I say normal things ? ;D
-
Bleh, all girls like soap opera type anime. ::)
These shoujo manga animes soooooo suck!!! ::)
-
ill stick to tom and jerry!!
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no i'm not it's just that she's not nice/cool in MY eyes ....everyone has a different opinion ,right? 8)
I was kidding ::)
i didn't get ur last sentence ???
I meant that I dont understand what Nancy sings because her songs are in Arabic.
-
ill stick to tom and jerry!!
Nope I mean shonen mangas (for boys) are badass !!! 8)
-
I was kidding ::)
I meant that I dont understand what Nancy sings because her songs are in Arabic.
lol ........ya u don't ......and arabic is not so last season ! >:( (i just feel the words r not that affective but when it comes to religious arabic songs they're much better than the eng islamic songs FYI) ::)
-
ya true..
-
ya true..
someone s with me ,see! ::) ::)
-
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs, "I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!" The four men didn't wait for a second threat. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then she realized why. It was for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a Frisbee, and two 12-packs of beer in the front seat. A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed. Moral of the story? If you're going to have a senior moment...make it memorable.
-
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs, "I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!" The four men didn't wait for a second threat. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then she realized why. It was for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a Frisbee, and two 12-packs of beer in the front seat. A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed. Moral of the story? If you're going to have a senior moment...make it memorable.
man that's so hilarious ...it's soo funy :D :D
-
Q. What's the difference between a man and E.T.?
A. E.T. phoned home.
Q. How do men get excersize at the beach?
A. By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
Q. What's a man's idea of helpin with the housework?
A. Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.
Q. Why are all dumb blond jokes oneliners?
A. So men can understand them.
Q. How do women define a 50/50 relationship?
A. We cook/they eat; We clean/they dirty; We iron/ they wrinkle.
Q. What is the difference between government bonds and men?
A. Government bonds mature.
Q. How are men like noodles?
A. They are always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need dough.
Q. Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women?
A. When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there.
Q. Why is it good that there are female astronauts?
A. When the crew gets lost in space at least the women will ask for directions.
Q. What does a man consider to be a seven course meal?
A. A hot dog and a six pack.
Q. What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?
A. Put the remote control between his toes.
-
man that's so hilarious ...it's soo funy :D :D
By the way its a true story!!
-
By the way its a true story!!
wallah:D ....man i don't kno what would i have done if i was her :D :D :D LMAO *lost in my own imagination :P*
-
Q. What's the difference between a man and E.T.?
A. E.T. phoned home.
Q. How do men get excersize at the beach?
A. By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
Q. What's a man's idea of helpin with the housework?
A. Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.
Q. Why are all dumb blond jokes oneliners?
A. So men can understand them.
Q. How do women define a 50/50 relationship?
A. We cook/they eat; We clean/they dirty; We iron/ they wrinkle.
Q. What is the difference between government bonds and men?
A. Government bonds mature.
Q. How are men like noodles?
A. They are always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need dough.
Q. Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women?
A. When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there.
Q. Why is it good that there are female astronauts?
A. When the crew gets lost in space at least the women will ask for directions.
Q. What does a man consider to be a seven course meal?
A. A hot dog and a six pack.
Q. What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?
A. Put the remote control between his toes.
lol..this is cool too .....one day inshAllah i'll share too 8)
-
loooool :D :D
inshallah id like 2 c ur jokes =P
-
loooool :D :D
inshallah id like 2 c ur jokes =P
hehe they'll be clean for sure ::) ..lol..anyways gtg pray .cya
-
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs, "I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!" The four men didn't wait for a second threat. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then she realized why. It was for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a Frisbee, and two 12-packs of beer in the front seat. A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed. Moral of the story? If you're going to have a senior moment...make it memorable.
LOOOOOOOL.hahahaha she is a crazy lady :P
Nice one! Thx for sharing. :D
-
id3ily golden girl ;)
mony: nytime..love ur thread By the way..its like my fav. in the forum :D
If "CON" is the opposite of "PRO", what is the oposite of PROGRESS?
I read that most accidents in the home happen in the kitchen. So I moved the cooker to the bedroom.
A man to his friend: "At my house I always say the last word".
His friend: "What is the word?"
The man: "I am sorry. Forgive me"
A nuclear war can ruin your whole day
Make love not war. Unless you want to do both. If so - get married.
How do you call a wife who knows where her husband lies down every night? - A widow!
Yesterday I thought about you all day.
I was at the Zoo.
You can't buy love, but you most certainly can pay dearly for it.
Marriage means that someone helps you coping with all the problems you never had when you were a bachelor.
During the first year of marriage, the husband speaks and the wife hears.
During the second year, the wife speaks and the husband hears.
During the third year both of them speak, but only the neighbours hear.
My wife ran away with my best friend.
To tell you the truth, I really miss him
Three couples went to a restaurant. The women wanted to compliment the men with something that was on the table.
"Could you pass me the sugar, sugar?" said the first gal.
"Could you pass me the honey, honey?" said the second.
"Could you pass me the bacon, pig?" said the third.
I never knew the meaning of true happiness until I got married, but then it was too late..
-
DUMB MEN JOKES
Q:What is the best way to get a man to stop pestering you?
A:Stare at his crotch and laugh.
Q:Why do men have to flex their muscles around women so much?
A:Because they have nothing else to brag about.
Q:If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman to hear him, is he still wrong?
A:YES!!!
Q:Why do men never stop to ask for directions?
A:Because they aren't lost, they just don't know where they are.
3 ways to have fun with men:
1.tell him that this girl he likes wants a kiss
2.take out the batteries on the remote and then tell him that a Football game is on
3.wait till the first two are complete, then innocently tell him that you thought he knew better.
Once there were three construction workers. When it was lunchtime one day, they all sat down together.
The first one opened his lunchbox and said, "Eeew, turkey! I hate turkey!" So he shot himself with a rivet gun.
The second one opened his lunchbox and said, "Eeew, ham! I hate ham!" So he jumped off the building.
The third one opened his box and said, "Eeew, mac and cheese! I hate mac and cheese!" So he ran himself over with a bulldozer.
At the funeral, their three wives were talking about their lost husbands. The first two were very sad, but the third was rather puzzled.
The first wife said, "I thought he liked turkey!"
The second one said, "I thought he liked ham!"
But the third one was still puzzled. She said, "I thought he packed his own lunch."
-
I think my wife is selling drugs! Yesterday I was running a little bit late for work and the phone rang. I answered it. Before I could say anything a male voice on the line said, Hey honey is that DOPE gone yet?
How can you tell if a man is happy?
Who cares!!!
A man walks into a bar and finds a Genie in a lamp. The Genie will only grant him one wish. The man wishes to be a million times smarter than any man on earth. *POOF* the Genie turns him into a woman!
Q: Why do men have slits in their underware?
A: So they can get oxygen to their brains.
Q: How can you tell if a man is sexually active?
A: He's breathing!
Q: How many men does it take to make popcorn?
A: Four, one to hold the pot, and three to act macho and shake the stove.
Q. How do you save a man from drowning?
A. Take your foot off of his head.
Q. How are men like parking spaces?
A. The good ones are always taken and all that is left are handicapped
-
Rejected Hallmark Cards
"Looking back over the years that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder:...
-- What was I thinking?"
"Congratulations on your wedding day!...
-- Too bad no one likes your wife."
"How could two people as beautiful as you....
-- have such an ugly baby?"
"I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love...
-- After having met you, I've changed my mind."
"I must admit, you brought Religion in my life...
-- I never believed in Hell until I met you."
"As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
-- that you're not here to ruin it for me."
"As you grow older, Mum, I think of all the gifts you've given me...
-- Like the need for therapy."
"Thanks for being a part of my life!!!...
-- I never knew what evil was before this!"
"Before you go,...
I would like you to take this knife out of my back.
-- You'll probably need it again."
"Someday I hope to get married...
-- but not to you."
"You look great for your age...
-- Almost Lifelike!"
"When we were together, you always said you'd die for me...
-- Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise."
"I knew the day would come when you would leave me for my best friend...
-- So here's his leash, water bowl and chew toys."
"We have been friends for a very long time...
-- What do you say we call it quits?"
"I'm so miserable without you...
-- It's almost like you're here."
"Congratulations on your new bundle of joy...
-- Did you ever find out who the father was?"
"You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...
-- I'd miss you heaps and think of you often."
-
Deep Thoughts
Why are they called a department if they are joined together?
An archaeologist is a best husband a woman can get. As older she grows, the more interested he isin her.
A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
If moths are attracted to bright lights, how come they sleep during the day?
I love being married. Its so great to find that special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Anyonewho thinks he is too small to make a difference has never been in bedwith a mosquito.
I wear my wifes glasses because she wants me to see things her way.
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and the world laughs louder.
-
If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours. If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with. If it just sits in your room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses your phone, takes your money, and never behaves as if you actually set it free in the first place, you either married it or gave birth to it.
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Nice one's dodi +rep.
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Thanks ari ;)
I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and
exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age. A
little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do
you think I'll live to be 80?"
He asked, "Well, do you smoke tobacco or drink beer/wine?"
"Oh no," I replied. "I've never done either."
Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?"
I said "No, I've heard that all red meat is very unhealthy!"
"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing,
ballooning, or rock climbing ?"
"No, I don't," I said.
He said, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or sexually fool around?"
"No," I said. "I've never done any of those things."
He looked at me and said, "Then why do you give a sh*t if you live to be
80?"
-
A little kid asks his father, "Daddy, is God a man or a woman?"
"Both son. God is both."
After a while the kid comes again and asks, "Daddy, is God black or white?"
"Both son, both."
The child returns a few minutes later and says, "Daddy, is Michael Jackson God?"
-
more 2 come ari
An Englishman, a Scott, and a Irishman walked into a pub.
Each orderd a pint of beer . Then a fly landed in each one's
beer . The Englishman, turning slightly green, pushed his beer away and asked for another one .The Scott took the fly out ,
shrugged, and drank his beer . The Irisman pinched the fly
between his fingers and yelled " SPIT IT OUT! "SPIT IT OUT!"
-
At age 4, success is..................not peeing in your pants. At age 12, success is..................having friends. At age 20, success is..................having sex. At age 35, success is..................making money. At age 70, success is..................having sex. At age 80, success is..................having friends. At age 90, success is..................not peeing your pants.
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A woman is standing nude looking in the bedroom mirror... She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly... I really need you to pay me a compliment."
The husband replies, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."
-
A woman pregnant with her first child paid a visit to her obstetrician's office.
After the exam, she shyly said, "My husband wants me to ask you...," to which the doctor replies, "I know, I know," placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "I get asked that all the time. Sex is fine until late in the pregnancy."
"No, that's not it," the woman confessed. "He wants to know if I can still mow the lawn."
-
A little kid asks his father, "Daddy, is God a man or a woman?"
"Both son. God is both."
After a while the kid comes again and asks, "Daddy, is God black or white?"
"Both son, both."
The child returns a few minutes later and says, "Daddy, is Michael Jackson God?"
HAHAHAHA LMAO!
-
A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"
"What dear?" She asked gently.
"I think you bring me bad luck."
-
A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff's deputy.
He thinks that he is smarter than the deputy because he is a lawyer
from New York and is certain that he has a better education than any
cop from Texas . He decides to prove this to himself and have some
fun at the Texas deputy's expense.
The deputy says, "License and registration, please."
"What for?" says the lawyer.
The deputy says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop
sign."
Then the lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
"You still didn't come to a complete stop, Says the deputy. License
and registration, please."
The lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
"The difference is you have to come to acomplete stop, that's the
law. License and registration, please!" the Deputy says.
Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow
down and stop, I'll give you my license and registration; and you
give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the
ticket."
"That sounds fair. Please exit your vehicle, sir," the deputy says.
At this point, the deputy takes out his nightstick and starts
beating the daylights out of the lawyer and says, "Do you want me to
stop, or just slow down?"
-
An 80-year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor asked him how he was feeling. "I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an eighteen year old bride who's pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?"
The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, "Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day, he went out in a bit of a hurry, and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun."
The doctor continued, "So he was in the woods, and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle."
"And do you know what happened?" the doctor queried.
Dumbfounded, the old man replied, "No."
The doctor continued, "The bear dropped dead in front of him!"
"That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man. "Someone else must have shot that bear."
"That's kind of what I'm getting at," replied the doctor.
-
A woman pregnant with her first child paid a visit to her obstetrician's office.
After the exam, she shyly said, "My husband wants me to ask you...," to which the doctor replies, "I know, I know," placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "I get asked that all the time. Sex is fine until late in the pregnancy."
"No, that's not it," the woman confessed. "He wants to know if I can still mow the lawn."
lol
-
A woman arrived at a party. While scanning the guests, she spotted an attractive man standing alone. She approached him, smiled and said, "Hello. My name is Carmen." "That's a beautiful name," he replied. "Is it a family name?" "No," she replied. As a matter of fact I gave it to myself. It represents the things that I enjoy the most - cars and men. Therefore I chose "Carmen". "What's your name?" she asked. He answered "B.J. Titsengolf."
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A lawyer, an economist, and a teacher were going to the bathroom. The lawyer gets done, washes his hands, and then proceeds to use almost the entire roll of paper towels to dry his hands. He says "I was taught to be thorough." The economist gets done, washes his hands, but uses only one paper towel. He says "I was taught to be environmentally friendly." The teacher gets done and leaves without washing his hands. He says "I was taught not to piss on my hands."
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Okay, Okay, it all makes sense now... I never looked at it this way before: MENtal illness MENstrual cramps MENtal breakdown MENopause GUYnecologist And when we have REAL trouble, it's a... HISterectomy Ever notice how all of women's problems start with MEN?
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A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, “Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?” The first man approached him and said, “Sir, I don’t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?” The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, “My wife’s first husband.”
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A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, “Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?” The first man approached him and said, “Sir, I don’t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?” The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, “My wife’s first husband.”
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! :D :D :D :D
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Meaning of... 'potentially' and 'realistically'
A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the
difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?"
The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother
if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask
your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars,
and then, ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million
dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that."
So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad
Pitt for a million dollars?"
The mother replied, "Of course, I would! We could really use that
money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great university!"
The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad
Pitt for a million dollars?"
The girl replied, "Oh, good heavens! I LOVE Brad Pitt and I would
sleep with him in a heartbeat. Are you nuts?"
The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with
Brad Pitt for a million dollars?"
"Of course," the brother replied. "Do you know how much a million
bucks would buy?"
The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad.
His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between
'potentially' and 'realistically'?"
The boy replied, "Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on three
million dollars, but 'realistically', we're living with two hookers
and a future congressman."
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Top Ten Things I Can Say Now That I Lost "American Idol"
10. "If I had won, I was gonna blow the prize money on candy and fireworks"
9. "Honestly, I thought I was auditioning for 'The Apprentice'"
8. "Ryan Seacrest isn't as smart as he seems on TV"
7. "If you want to see me 'perform,' I'll be working the noon-to-8 shift at Old Navy tomorrow"
6. "George W. Bush didn't win the popular vote either, and he's done pretty well for himself"
5. "Underneath that table, Randy Jackson doesn't wear pants"
4. "Until 10 minutes ago, I had no idea who Dave Letterman was"
3. "I could take down Clay Aiken with one arm in a sling"
2. "I handled my loss well -- I gathered my belongings, said my goodbyes and keyed the crap out of Simon's car"
1. "I have one thing to say to the voters: What in the hell is wrong with you people?"
-
You Know You've Finally Turned Into a Mom When...
You automatically double-knot everything you tie.
You find yourself humming the Barney song as you do the dishes.
You hear a baby cry in the grocery store, and you start to gently sway back and forth, back and forth. However, your children are at school!
You actually start to like the smell of strained carrots mixed with applesauce.
You weep through the scene in Dumbo when his mom is taken away, not to mention what Bambi does to you.
You get soooo into crafts you contemplate writing a book called 101 Fun Crafts to do with Dryer Lint and Eggshells.
You spend a half hour searching for your sunglasses only to have your teenager say, "Mom, why don't you wear the ones you pushed up on your head?"
You are out for a nice romantic meal with your husband, enjoying some real adult conversation, when suddenly you realize that you've reached over and started to cut up his steak!
-
These quotes were taken from actual Federal (US) employee performance evaluations...
"Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig."
"His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity"
"I would not allow this employee to breed"
"This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won't be"
"Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap"
"When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet"
"He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle"
"This young lady has delusions of adequacy"
"He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them"
"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot"
"This employee should go far, and the sooner the better"
"Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together"
"A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus"
"He certainly takes a long time to make his pointless"
"He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier"
"I would like to go hunting with him sometime"
"He's been working with glue too much"
"He would argue with a signpost"
"He has knack for making strangers immediately"
"He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room"
"When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell"
"If you see 2 people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one"
"A photographic memory but with the cap over the lens"
"A prime candidate for natural deselection"
"Donated his brain to science before he was done using it"
"Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming"
"Has 2 brains, one is lost, the other is out looking for it"
"If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week"
"If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change"
"If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean"
"It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000 other sperm"
"One neuron short of a synapse"
"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled"
"Takes him 12 hours to watch 60 Minutes"
"The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead"
-
A French guest who was staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room service for some pepper.
"Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge.
"Toilette pepper!"
-
Dear Internal Revenue Service:
Enclosed you will find my 2005 tax return showing that I
owe $3,407.00 in taxes. Please note the attached article
from the USA Today newspaper, dated 12 November, wherein
you will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is paying $171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.
I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats (valued @ $2,400) and six
(6) hammers valued @ $1,029), which I secured at Home Depot, bringing my total remittance to $3,429.00.
Please apply the overpayment of $22.00 to the "Presidential Election Fund," as noted on my return. You can do this inexpensively by sending them one (1) 1.5 " Phillips Head screw (see aforementioned article from USA Today newspaper detailing how H.U.D. pays $22.00 each for 1.5" Phillips Head Screws). One screw is enclosed for your convenience.
It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward to paying it again next year.
Sincerely,
A Satisfied Taxpayer
-
Stock Market Investment tips for 2006
Get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations in 2006.
1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R.Grace Co. will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.
2.) Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly Warner Cracker.
3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and issue forth as: MMMGood.
4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa.
5. FedEx is expected to join its major competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.
6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become:
Fairwell Honeychild.
7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: Poupon Pants.
8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will
become: Knott NOW!
9. Victoria's Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new
name: Titty Titty Bang Bang
-
Top Ten Things You Need To Know To Be A Nurse
10. If it's wet make it dry.
9. If it's dry make it wet.
8. Always ask for on-call pay before agreeing to overtime.
7. Never tell management what you are really thinking.
6. Never finish report with, "You have an easy assignment".
5. Never say. "This looks like a easy assignment".
4. Don't expect nurses aids to do their job.
3. Don't expect doctors to believe any thing you tell them.
2. If you don't have enough time to do everything, take about 30 minutes to complain about it.
1. If it moves, rattles, shakes, falls down, or won't stay in place: tape it.
-
Ellen Degeneres Quotes
I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her.
I think they should have a Barbie with a buzz cut.
I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves.
People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
The sixties were when hallucinogentic drugs were really, really big. And I don't think it's a coincidence that we had the type of shows we had then, like The Flying Nun.
Yeah I'm thirty-six, but on the show I'm thirty-two. Nobody wants to watch a thirty-six year old woman, so they decided to make me thirty-two. Much more appealing somehow.
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is.
-
SCHIZOPHRENIA: Do You Hear What I Hear?
DEMENTIA: I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas
MANIC: Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Busses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and...
PARANOID: Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me
PERSONALITY DISORDER: You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER: Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, ........ (better start again)
PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PERSONALITY: On The First Day of Christmas My True Love Gave To Me (and then took it all away)
BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER: Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire.
-
If I die today, it's going to be dodi's fault!!!!! :P
-
loool 5alas thts enough 4 today 3ashan kratos :D
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loool 5alas thts enough 4 today 3ashan kratos :D
lol
i.e. okay this is enough for today ,only for kratos's sakes
-
Little Melissa comes home from first grade and tells her father that they
learned about the history of Valentine's Day. "Since Valentine's Day is
for a Christian saint and we're Jewish," she asks, "will God get mad at
me for giving someone a valentine?" Melissa's father thinks a bit, then
says "No, I don't think God would get mad. Who do you want to give a
valentine to?"
"Osama Bin Laden," she says. "Why Osama Bin Laden," her father asks in
shock. "Well," she says, "I thought that if a little American Jewish girl
could have enough love to give Osama a valentine, he might start to think
that maybe we're not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit.
And if other kids saw what I did and sent valentines to Osama, he'd love
everyone a lot. And then he'd start going all over the place to tell
everyone how much he loved them and how he didn't hate anyone anymore."
Her father's heart swells and he looks at his daughter with newfound
pride. "Melissa, that's the most wonderful thing I've ever heard." "I
know," Melissa says, "and once that gets him out in the open, the Marines
could blow the crap out of him."
-
1. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
2. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"
3. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."
4. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."
5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
6. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."
7. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"
9. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
10. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
11. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
12. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
13. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
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c'mon thts being too harsh!!
i love u mommy <3
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c'mon thts being too harsh!!
i love u mommy <3
i kno ......omi fidtich
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c'mon thts being too harsh!!
i love u mommy <3
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww lol
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c'mon thts being too harsh!!
i love u mommy <3
Hahaha that's sweeet (:
Just an email forward that made me laugh!
-
You people stopped posting because of kratos for 8 days ::) *kicks Kratos from her thread*
Thanks for the jokes people! :D I will be back with few riddles soon. 8)
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haha joke of the year....a freind of mine says tht bush is a muslim.............lol
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haha joke of the year....a freind of mine says tht bush is a muslim.............lol
and wen i tell him tht he is not he refuses to accept he is like 120 % sure.......:-/
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and wen i tell him tht he is not he refuses to accept he is like 120 % sure.......:-/
no offence man but ur friend is an idiot :P
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no offence man but ur friend is an idiot :P
I agree. He is an idiot. :)
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I am actually beginning to miss Kratos....
Hey dude, where are you? Dragon ate u or sth?
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I am actually beginning to miss Kratos....
Hey dude, where are you? Dragon ate u or sth?
chilaw !!! .. don't worry , he is actually alive :P :P
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lol what happened to Kratos xD u guys kicked him :o ;D??
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nah ..he disappeared for a week no idea y and now he's back that's all *hides her evil laugh :P :P *
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By the way i luv the bolding effect :D
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By the way i luv the bolding effect :D
i lub it t00 :)
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if we have an orange and we wanna divide it into 3 and distributed on USA... how can this be possible?
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ok this is a complete guess but would u give one piece each to "U", "S" and "A".
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ya i know... old riddle :P :D
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ok this is a complete guess but would u give one piece each to "U", "S" and "A".
hahaha ..
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hahaha ..
How many times i have seen your signature change.
Lost count actually :P
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How many times i have seen your signature change.
Lost count actually :P
She changes her sig more in a day than you change your underwear in a week. :P jk
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How many times i have seen your signature change.
Lost count actually :P
i ALWAYS change it
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She changes her sig more in a day than you change your underwear in a week. :P jk
bahahaha.
Kratos never fails to bore me ::) :P
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bahahaha.
Kratos never fails to bore me ::) :P
haha...me tooo
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awwwwwwwwwwwwwww kartoos okay han...:P
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This place is dead -__-
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People need to change their underwear daily. Keeps them clean.
Here is a riddle :
What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries?
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People need to change their underwear daily. Keeps them clean.
Here is a riddle :
What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries?
A towel..
My rep...
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Anotherrrrr riddle!
You throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?
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Anotherrrrr riddle!
You throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?
Egg..
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No :P
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It is correct..
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O.o why? You googled it?
Because to me, it is NOT correct. If you have a prove, post.
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O.o why? You googled it?
Because to me, it is NOT correct. If you have a prove, post.
Cuz I had heard it earlier.... Google says it is wrong... But I am right... at least for the ones who don't like yolk.
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The correct answer is chicken so you are wrong.
NOTHING BEATS GOOGLE!
And no +rep for u since you already know those riddles, not fair to get 6 points. ;)
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The correct answer is chicken so you are wrong.
NOTHING BEATS GOOGLE!
And no +rep for u since you already know those riddles, not fair to get 6 points. ;)
Ok.
Not like I expected something from a stingy person... I would be a fool to do so.
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Yeah yeah yeah :P
Another riddle :
I can run but not walk. Wherever I go, thought follows close behind. What am I?
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Yeah yeah yeah :P
Another riddle :
I can run but not walk. Wherever I go, thought follows close behind. What am I?
a nose?
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Yes! You got it right...u knew it from b4 or u googled it? :P or was it ur very smart brain which figured out the answer? :P lol
Another one :
What goes around the world but stays in a corner?
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Yes! You got it right...u knew it from b4 or u googled it? :P or was it ur very smart brain which figured out the answer? :P lol
Another one :
What goes around the world but stays in a corner?
i heard it b4
something to do with an airplane??
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ok the answer is a postage stamp (googled it :P :D)
heres another riddle
Think of words ending in -GRY. Angry and hungry are two of them. There are only three words in the English language. What is the third word? The word is something that everyone uses every day. If you have listened carefully, I have already told you what it is.
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language :P :P
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yup ur right! :D
+rep ;)
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another riddle ..another riddle :)
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Here is one :
Give me food, and I will live; give me water, and I will die. What am I?
It is so easy.
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Flame..I suppose.
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Flame..I suppose.
Yeah, answer is Fire!
You knew it from before? or googled it? OR ur smart mind found it out? ::) :P
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Yeah, answer is Fire!
You knew it from before? or googled it? OR ur smart mind found it out? ::) :P
I am dumb but sometimes the bulb on my back glows brightly.
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+rep then. =]
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waiting for the next one :D
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waiting for the next one :D
Here =] :
I have holes in my top and bottom, my left and right, and in the middle. But I still hold water. What am I?
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Here =] :
I have holes in my top and bottom, my left and right, and in the middle. But I still hold water. What am I?
A sponge.
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Hey! Where's my rep! >:(
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Hey! Where's my rep! >:(
hahahahaha, this is so not fair Engraved! I +repped you many times before. Like you increase by 12 points every day -_-
Let me give the love to other people in need :P
But, if you wish to +rep me and be generous then thank you :P
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Hiya Shoshou. Welcome back to early morning period. :)
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Hiya Shoshou. Welcome back to early morning period. :)
Hiiiiiii Alpha! :D
I was sooo busy the past duration! I am getting free now like before and I hope you guys see me more active. I will have to go out tomorrow though with dad and bro to buy some stuff. -_-
Actually, I have been awake since yesterday LOL. I couldn't sleep :-\
You have school?
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Good to have you roaming around again. ;)
No, I won't go. Already dead tired. :(
You can't sleep?
Tried drinking some milk? ;D
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Anyway, I gotta go... Take Care :)
& Have a Nice Day Ahead
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Good to have you roaming around again. ;)
No, I won't go. Already dead tired. :(
You can't sleep?
Tried drinking some milk? ;D
hahahaha I drank milk, yes :P
My daily routine is messed up cause it is summer and I HATE IT when I sleep and wake up late. -_-
And you do not have summer vacations? =/ always school? Have a good day!
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Here is a riddle :
Throw it off the highest building, and I'll not break. But put me in the ocean, and I will. What am I?
-
Here is a riddle :
Throw it off the highest building, and I'll not break. But put me in the ocean, and I will. What am I?
Paper? :-\
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Paper? :-\
You are getting veeeerrrry close! Something which is made of trees also.
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hahahaha I drank milk, yes :P
My daily routine is messed up cause it is summer and I HATE IT when I sleep and wake up late. -_-
And you do not have summer vacations? =/ always school? Have a good day!
Yes... For more two weeks I have school. And then, vacations. Well, I wouldn't call it vacation cause tuitions get extended during the period, and I end up getting more tired. :)
And about your riddle, my mind's not working. :D
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Here is a riddle :
Throw it off the highest building, and I'll not break. But put me in the ocean, and I will. What am I?
Paper?
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Oh didn't know somebody already answered paper!
I think its toilet paper or tissue then?
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Sponge...
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I think its toilet paper or tissue then?
If it's not paper, that's the only other thing I can think of too...
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Stylish got it right! +rep. =]
Here are another 2 :
1)I am the black child of a white father, a wingless bird, flying even to the clouds of heaven. I give birth to tears of mourning in pupils that meet me, even though there is no cause for grief, and at once on my birth I am dissolved into air. What am I?
2)Pronounced as one letter,
And written with three,
Two letters there are,
And two only in me.
I'm double, I'm single,
I'm black, blue, and gray,
I'm read from both ends,
And the same either way.
What am I?
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first one is dust? :/
I'm not very good at riddles...lol
2nd don't know :P
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Stylish got it right! +rep. =]
Here are another 2 :
1)I am the black child of a white father, a wingless bird, flying even to the clouds of heaven. I give birth to tears of mourning in pupils that meet me, even though there is no cause for grief, and at once on my birth I am dissolved into air. What am I?
2)Pronounced as one letter,
And written with three,
Two letters there are,
And two only in me.
I'm double, I'm single,
I'm black, blue, and gray,
I'm read from both ends,
And the same either way.
What am I?
First one is -----------> Smoke
Second one is ---------> Eye
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Late :D
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lol i m always late :D
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DrEvil got it right! It should've been the letter 'I' for the first one though. +rep. =]
Okay, I'll post more riddles and no one will be late lol.
Here :
What can run but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a head but never weeps, has a bed but never sleeps?
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DrEvil got it right! It should've been the letter 'I' for the first one though. +rep. =]
Okay, I'll post more riddles and no one will be late lol.
Here :
What can run but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a head but never weeps, has a bed but never sleeps?
Ver-ri ;)
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Here :
What can run but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a head but never weeps, has a bed but never sleeps?
River...??
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Alpha got it right first! +rep.
here more :
I went into the woods and got it. I sat down to seek it. I brought it home with me because I couldn't find it. What is it?
I am mother and father, but never birth or nurse. I'm rarely still, but I never wander. What am I?
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Alpha got it right first! +rep.
here more :
I went into the woods and got it. I sat down to seek it. I brought it home with me because I couldn't find it. What is it?
I am mother and father, but never birth or nurse. I'm rarely still, but I never wander. What am I?
First One---> A lighter or a splinter...??
Second One---> A tree. ;D
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First One---> A lighter or a splinter...??
Second One---> A tree. ;D
Splinter, it's. ;)
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ok so im late again :D
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ok so im late again :D
:D Okay, +rep. For being late. :P
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:D Okay, +rep. For being late. :P
lol haha... no comment ;D Thanks tho
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It's always cool when somebody's more late than you are. :P
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k heres a riddle:
If a train was on its way 2 Florida and it tipped over, where would they bury the survivors????
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They don't cuz the survivors aren't dead. :P
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They don't cuz the survivors aren't dead. :P
yup rite ;)
+rep
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another one
There is a guy that is all black...everything on him is black; nothing on him is not black! There are no lights on in the stores and no reflecters in the road and no moon or stars in the sky! A guy was driving down the street and turns around the guy. How did he know the black man was there?
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Cuz the guy was laughing?
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Cuz the guy was laughing?
nope
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caz it was day....
ahh so easy
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caz it was day....
ahh so easy
riteee
+rep
You must wait 2 hours between reputation actions. You have approximately 62 minutes left to wait
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hmm :-\
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so any more ......i dont have any ::)
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hmm :-\
a man builds a house with all four sides facing south. A bear walks past the house, what colour is the bear??
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ur still gonna get ur +rep By the way ;)
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a man builds a house with all four sides facing south. A bear walks past the house, what colour is the bear??
hahahqa....brown ::)
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if an electric train is going east n the wind is blowin west which direction will the smoke travel?
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hahahqa....brown ::)
nope,
white, the house is built directly on the north pole :D :D
wait for my rep ::)
kim: electric trains dont produce smoke :D :D
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kim: electric trains dont produce smoke :D :D
mwahahah yess u have been crowned the master of all riddles!!lol
*puts crown on dodis head* ::) ::)
and the + rep is on its way
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mwahahah yess u have been crowned the master of all riddles!!lol
*puts crown on dodis head* ::) ::)
and the + rep is on its way
awwww Thanks kimmy :-* :-*
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another riddle :D :D D: D
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Here it is!
There are 3 gentlemen in a meeting: Mr. Yellow, Mr. Green and Mr. violet. They are wearing yellow,green and violet ties. Mr. Yellow says: "Did you notice that the color of our ties are different from our names?" The person who is wearing the green tie says, "Yes, you are right!"
Do you know who is wearing what color tie?
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Mr. Yellow - Violet.
Mr. Green - Yellow
Mr. Violet - Green
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Nice! +rep.
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Nice! +rep.
Thanks. ;D
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After just a few years of marriage filled with constant arguments, a young man and his wife decided the only way to save their marriage was to try counseling. They had been at each other's throats for some time and felt that this was their last straw.
When they arrived at the counsellor's office, the counselor jumped right in and opened the floor for discussion. "What seems to be the problem?"
Immediately, the husband held his long face down without anything to say. In contrast, the wife began talking 90 miles an hour, describing all the wrongs within their marriage.
After 15 minutes of listening to the wife, the counselor went over to her, picked her up by her shoulders, kissed her passionately and sat her back down. Afterwards, the wife sat speechless.
The marriage counselor looked over at the husband, who stared in disbelief. The counselor said to the husband, "Your wife NEEDS that at least twice a week!"
The husband scratched his head and replied, "I can have her here on Tuesdays and Thursdays."
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A man and a woman were married for 40 years. When they first got married the man said, "I am putting a box under the bed. You must promise never to look in it." In all their 40 years of marriage the woman never looked.
However on the afternoon of their 40th anniversary curiosity got the best of her and she lifted the lid and peeked inside. In the box were 3 empty beer bottles and $1954.25 in small bills. She closed the box and put it back under the bed. Now that she knew what was in the box, she was doubly curious as to why.
That evening they were out for a special dinner at their favorite restaurant. After dinner the woman could no longer contain her curiosity and she confessed, saying, "I am so sorry. For all these years I kept my promise and never looked. However today the temptation was too much and I gave in. But now I need to know why do you keep the bottles in the box?"
The man thought for a while and said, "I guess after all these wonderful years you deserve to know the truth: Whenever I was unfaithful to you I put an empty beer bottle in the box under the bed to remind myself not to do it again."
The woman was shocked, but said, "I am very disappointed and saddened, but I guess after all those years away from home on the road, temptation does happen. And I guess that 3 times is not that bad considering the years." They hugged and made their peace.
A little while later, the woman asked the man, "Why do you have all that money in the box?" To which the man answered, "Whenever the box filled with empties, I cashed them in."
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APPLICATION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER
(REVOCABLE AT ANY TIME)
NOTE - This application will be Incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.
1. NAME:_____________________ DATE OF BIRTH: _______________
2. HEIGHT:___________ WEIGHT: ______IQ: ________GPA: ______
3. SOCIAL SECURITY #: ___________DRIVERS LICENSE #: _________
4. BOY SCOUT RANK:_______________________________________
5. HOME ADDRESS: ________________CITY: _________ ZIP ______
6. Do you have one MALE and one FEMALE parent? Yes____ No_______ If NO, explain: ________________________________________________
7. Number of years parents married: ___________
8. DO YOU OWN A VAN? ____ A TRUCK WITH OVERSIZED TIRES OR CAMPER SHELL? ____ WATERBED? _____ MOTORCYCLE? _____ TATOO? ____ COLOR ALTERED HAIR? ___ (IF YES TO ANY PART OF #8, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY)
9. In 50 words or less, what does "Late" mean to you? _________________________________________________________
10. In 50 words or less, what does "DO NOT TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you? _________________________________________________________
11. In 50 words or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you? _________________________________________________________
12. What church do you attend? ________________ How often do you attend? ____/ week
13. When would be the best time to interview your father, mother, priest or pastor? ____________
14. Fill in the blanks: Please answer freely - all answers are confidential (That means I won't tell anyone - I promise):
A. If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded is in the _____________
B. If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my _____________
C. A women's place is in the __________________
D. The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is ____________________
E. When I first meet a girl, the first thing I notice is _____________________ (NOTE: If the answer to "E" begins with a B, T, or A, discontinue and leave the premises immediately with your head hung low.)
15. What do you want to be IF you grow up? _________________________
16. Do you plan to attend a Catholic or Christian College? _________ Which one? ____________
I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, AND RED HOT POKERS.
_____________________ Signature (That means sign your name)
Thank you for your interest. Please allow four to six years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write (this action will void this application). If your application is rejected you will be notified by two angels wearing red suits and carrying pitch forks. (You might want to start praying now).
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Nice ones Stylish... :D :D :D
Application was hilarious... HAHAHAHA! :D :D
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Haha, Thanks! :D
-
really awesome application ;D
-
haha lol :D
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LOOOOOOL @ the application one! haha.
+rep Stylish for the jokes and riddles. =]
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Thanks for the +rep Shoshou!!! :D
Thanks Golden girl! :D
-
np :)
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Hahahahaha!
I can imagine :P :D :D :D
Good one stylish!
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Hahahahaha!
I can imagine :P :D :D :D
Good one stylish!
Hey Thanks Nid! :D :D
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FAITHFUL OR UNFAITHFUL?
Three men died and stood in front of God.
God asked the first if he had been faithful to his wife. He admitted to two affairs during his marriage. God gave him a compact car to drive in heaven.
The second man admitted to only one affair and was given a midsize car.
The third man was asked the same question and said that he had been faithful to his wife until the day he died. God praised him and gave him a big luxury car.
A week later the three guys met in a parking lot. The man driving the luxury car began to cry.
"What's the matter?"
"I just passed my wife, and she was riding a bike!"
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Another one (CENSORED to remove "dirty" parts :P ):
CHANGES IN MARRIAGE
When you are dating..... He takes you out to have a good time
When you are married ....He brings home a 6 pack, and says "What are you going to drink?"
When you are dating..... He holds your hand in public
When you are married ....He flicks your ear in public
When you are dating..... A Single bed for 2 isn't THAT bad
When you are married ....A King size bed feels like an army cot
When you are dating..... He hugs you, when he walks by you ...for no reason
When you are married ....He grabs your b**bs any chance he gets
When you are dating..... You picture the two of you together, growing old together
When you are married ....You wonder who will die first
When you are dating..... Just looking at him makes you feel all "mushy"
When you are married ....When you look at him, you want to claw his eyes out.
When you are dating..... He knows what the "hamper" is
When you are married ....The floor will suffice as a dirty clothes storage area
When you are dating..... He understands if you "aren't in the mood"
When you are married ....He says "It's your job."
When you are dating..... He understands that you have "male" friends
When you are married ....He thinks they are all out to steal you away
When you are dating..... He likes to "discuss" things
When you are married ....He develops a "blank" stare
When you are dating..... He calls you by name
When you are married ....He calls you "Hey" and refers to you when speaking to others as "She.
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When you are dating..... You picture the two of you together, growing old together
When you are married ....You wonder who will die first
HAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!!!!!
That was a funny one but the there are some dirty parts. :P
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FAITHFUL OR UNFAITHFUL?
Three men died and stood in front of God.
God asked the first if he had been faithful to his wife. He admitted to two affairs during his marriage. God gave him a compact car to drive in heaven.
The second man admitted to only one affair and was given a midsize car.
The third man was asked the same question and said that he had been faithful to his wife until the day he died. God praised him and gave him a big luxury car.
A week later the three guys met in a parking lot. The man driving the luxury car began to cry.
"What's the matter?"
"I just passed my wife, and she was riding a bike!"
ROFL! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! looooooooool! That made me laugh! loooool. :D :P
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HAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!!!!!
That was a funny one but the there are some dirty parts. :P
Okay, modified! ;)
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ALWAYS THERE FOR ME
This woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me through all the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"
"What dear," she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.
"I think you're bad luck....."
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THE MARRIAGE FAIRY
A couple had been married for 25 years and was celebrating the husband's 60th birthday.
During the party, a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all those years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife said, "We've been so poor all these years, and I've never gotten to see the world. I wish we could travel all over the world." The fairy waved her wand and POOF! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, and then said, "Well, I'd like to be married to a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy waved her wand and POOF! He was 90.
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THE MARRIAGE FAIRY
A couple had been married for 25 years and was celebrating the husband's 60th birthday.
During the party, a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all those years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife said, "We've been so poor all these years, and I've never gotten to see the world. I wish we could travel all over the world." The fairy waved her wand and POOF! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, and then said, "Well, I'd like to be married to a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy waved her wand and POOF! He was 90.
ahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
AWESOME !!!
cnt stop laughing !!
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hahaha lol
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DICTIONARY OF DATING
ATTRACTION... the act of associating horniness with a particular person.
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT... what occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet.
DATING... the process of spending enormous amounts of money, time and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don't especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future.
BIRTH CONTROL... avoiding pregnancy through such tactics as swallowing special pills, inserting a diaphragm, using a condom, and dating repulsive men.
EASY... a term used to describe a woman who has the sexual morals of a man.
EYE CONTACT... a method utilized by one person to indicate that they are interested in another. Despite being advised to do so, many men have difficulty looking a woman directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to shyness, but usually due to the fact that a woman's eyes are not located in her chest.
FRIEND... a person in your acquaintance who has some flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.
INDIFFERENCE... a woman's feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by the man to be "playing hard to get".
INTERESTING... a word a man uses to describe a woman who lets him do all the talking.
IRRITATING HABIT... what the endearing little qualities that initially attract two people to each other turn into after a few months together.
LAW OF RELATIVITY... how attractive a given person appears to be is directly proportionate to how unattractive your date is.
NYMPHOMANIAC... a man's term for a woman who wants to have sex more often than he does.
SOBER... condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love.
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WHAT A WIFE SAYS...AND MEANS
The wife says: You want
The wife means: You want
The wife says: We need
The wife means: I want
The wife says: It's your decision
The wife means: The correct decision should be obvious
The wife says: Do what you want
The wife means: You'll pay for this later
The wife says: We need to talk
The wife means: I need to complain
The wife says: Sure... go ahead
The wife means: I don't want you to
The wife says: I'n not upset
The wife means: Of course I'm upset you moron
The wife says: You're ... so manly
The wife means: You need a shave and sweat a lot
The wife says: Be romantic, turn out the lights
The wife means: I have flabby thighs.
The wife says: This kitchen is so inconvenient
The wife means: I want a new house.
The wife says: I want new curtains.
The wife means: Also carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper!
The wife says: I need wedding shoes.
The wife means: The other forty pairs are the wrong shade of white.
The wife says: Hang the picture there
The wife means: No, I mean hang it there!
The wife says: I heard a noise
The wife means: I noticed you were almost asleep.
The wife says: Do you love me?
The wife means: I'm going to ask for something expensive.
The wife says: How much do you love me?
The wife means: I did something today you're not going to like.
The wife says: I'll be ready in a minute.
The wife means: Kick off your shoes and take an hour nap.
The wife says: Am I fat?
The wife means: Tell me I'm beautiful.
The wife says: You have to learn to communicate.
The wife means: Just agree with me.
The wife says: Are you listening to me?
The wife means: [Too late, your doomed.]
The wife says: Yes
The wife means: No
The wife says: No
The wife means: No
The wife says: Maybe
The wife means: No
The wife says: I'm sorry
The wife means: You'll be sorry
The wife says: Do you like this recipe?
The wife means: You better get used to it
The wife says: All we're going to buy is a soap dish
The wife means: I'm coming back with enough to fill this place.
The wife says: Was that the baby?
The wife means: Get out of bed and walk him
The wife says: I'm not yelling!
The wife means: Yes I am! I think this is important!
In answer to the question "What's wrong?"
The wife says: The same old thing.
The wife means: Nothing.
The wife says: Nothing.
The wife means: Everything.
The wife says: Nothing, really.
The wife means: It's just that you're an idiot.
The wife says: I don't want to talk about it.
The wife means: I'm still building up steam.
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haha lol
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Hahahahaha! :P
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good job stylish :D
these r awesome and TRUE :D
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When did stylish become all funny. I missed SF
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My thread is dead.
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When did stylish become all funny. I missed SF
When will you be traveling By the way..?
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When will you be traveling By the way..?
I AM ON TRAVELS.
You dont see me on at night do you. ::)
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oh, so you are not in KSA?
Where are you then? and how do u get internet access ?
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oh, so you are not in KSA?
Where are you then? and how do u get internet access ?
check my isp address yo. ::)
its a mere 56 kb internet -_-
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Why can't you just say where you are ? Checking IP and stuff is just me abusing my powers because I do not have to do that for personal purpose ::)
I see...not a very fast internet?
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Why can't you just say where you are ? Checking IP and stuff is just me abusing my powers because I do not have to do that for personal purpose ::)
I see...not a very fast internet?
i see.
i am in a village. a pretty stone age one at that.
Good for sf still. i can still pm my friends. ;D
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Cool. A village in Pakistan? When are you coming back to KSA? You have your own laptop?
I do not pm anyone these days.
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Cool. A village in Pakistan? When are you coming back to KSA? You have your own laptop?
I do not pm anyone these days.
You ignored me .one day. bas. I will never forget that -_- :P
i have a laptop
i convinced my granddad for a stone age like internet with a radar like structure hanging on the wall.
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Sorry. I was fighting with Engraved so did not want to get all angry at you because I tend to get angry on everyone when I am hurt. lol. I ignore a lot of pms but I do not mean to. I pm Roxy, *hope* a lot though at night.
Cool, lappy. So what do you do all day ?
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Sorry. I was fighting with Engraved so did not want to get all angry at you because I tend to get angry on everyone when I am hurt. lol. I ignore a lot of pms but I do not mean to. I pm Roxy, *hope* a lot though at night.
Cool, lappy. So what do you do all day ?
Nobody ignores me. ;D
Although i wonder why is roxy doing that. LOL
football, sleepovers, football sleepovers, football,food, sf.
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Ignoring is part of my personality. Too bad. I do not mean it but I just ignore a lot.
Roxy is a nice person, she does not ignore people I guess.
Nice. Football almost all day makes you athletic. ;)
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Ignoring is part of my personality. Too bad. I do not mean it but I just ignore a lot.
Roxy is a nice person, she does not ignore people I guess.
Nice. Football almost all day makes you athletic. ;)
That;s bad. Like seriously bad.
Roxy is evil mate. ::)
I am not athletic, i just like football alot
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When someone ignores you..it hurts :-\ In fact..I get more worried abt the person..like why is the person ignoring me ???
Arsenal!!!!!...ssup? missed you brother! :D
Sleepover again? ::) :P
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Roxy is evil?! shaaaaatttt upppppp duuuuddde! hahahaha this is her style! No way! She is super sweet and hilarious!
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She is bloody innocent.
8)
@nid..Yo tomorrow..we would get bored . ::) talking
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haha...so you have sleepovers every alternate day? :P
So do you visit the village very often...how do you know these ppl..i mean are these your frnds or cousins...you know them well right...despite you not staying there
So you guys'll watch the finals together...that is soo cool...
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haha...so you have sleepovers every alternate day? :P
So do you visit the village very often...how do you know these ppl..i mean are these your frnds or cousins...you know them well right...despite you not staying there
So you guys'll watch the finals together...that is soo cool...
You know.
the grand daddy, the one who is master of the whole clan resides there. We have to visit.Obligation.
its fun sometimes.
laa, i am not watching final.
i am french freak through and through
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You know.
the grand daddy, the one who is master of the whole clan resides there. We have to visit.Obligation.
its fun sometimes.
laa, i am not watching final.
i am french freak through and through
oh ok
You love your grandpa after all ;) You know a lot of things in your genes come from him haha remember? :P
Not watching it? :o I'm gonna watch it and bunk school on monday :D
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Yallah. Nid i am tired. Just replied so you wont feel i am ignoring you. :P
Yeps, Partners in crime <3
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hahaha...thanks :P
now go get some rest :) Take care :)
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hey is this a clean jokes thread? because i had to remove my joke of that 85 yr old man from that clean jokes thread even though it was clean and if any1 misunderstands then it may bcome dirty.
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Riddle,
Which element is abundant in crows?
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LOL, no one?
Chromium ::) Lame I know. :P
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A riddle here.
What did the Fish say when it Swam into the concrete wall???
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Another .
A man was to be sentenced, and the judge told him, "You may make a statement. If it is true, I'll sentence you to four years in prison. If it is false, I'll sentence you to six years in prison." After the man made his statement, the judge decided to let him go free. What did the man say?
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"Judge, sentence me for six years in prison." ;)
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"Judge, sentence me for six years in prison." ;)
Right, and the first one ?
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umm, you know, i can't answer EVERY riddle! (i'am not as smart as google) ;) :P
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A riddle here.
What did the Fish say when it Swam into the concrete wall???
Answer : Damn!
:D
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:D :D :D
ROFL !
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A man walks into a bar and notices his friend sitting alone staring at a tiny man on the table playing the piano.
"Wow, look how small he is, where did you get him?!" Says the man.
"Oh, well there's this genie round the back of bar, and he grants you whatever wish you want."
Sure enough, the man goes round the back of the bar and there sits a genie.
"You grant wishes right?"
"Yes." replies the genie.
"Hmm, I'd like a million bucks."
Then, out of nowhere, a million ducks appear, and waddle behind the annoyed man as he goes back into the bar.
"Look, that genie gave me ducks instead of bucks!"
His friends sitting at the table replies,
"Well yeah, do you really think I asked for a twelve inch pianist?"
::)
A man sat down at a bar and told the bartender, "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can piss into the cup all the way over there on the other side of the bar and not miss a single drop."
The bartender said, "There is no way you can do that. Sure, I'll bet you three hundred dollars."
The man then begins to undo his pants and begins pissing. He starts pissing all over the bar, spraying on the bottles and the bartender, not making a single drop in the cup.
The bartender starts smiling and laughing and says, "That's it, you owe me three hundred dollars."
The man then gets up and walks over to the pool table and starts laughing and shaking hands with the men standing there. He walks back to bar, sits down and starts laughing at the bartender and hands him the money.
The bartender asks, "Why are you laughing? You just lost the bet."
The man said, "I'm laughing because I bet those guys over there one thousand dollars that I could piss all over you and your bar and you would still be laughing when I was done."
:P
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loool nice ones ! pretty smart even !
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ROFL! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! looooooooool! That made me laugh! loooool. :D :P
dont laugh that much dude, we never know we can be the one driving the luxury car, i.e the victim!!
lol
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WOW i cant beLIEVE this thread is still going strong... 2 years ago when I was about to sit for my IG boards, this thread was commonly posted on by me... now im soon sitting for IB.... ohhh nostalgia :-\
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POPE AND QUEEN OF ENGLAND
The Pope and the Queen of England are on the same stage at an Anglican and Catholic commemoration of the Anglo-Irish accords - the crowd is huge - thousands. Her Majesty and His Holiness can't help but have a little rivalry - both being heads of churches and all.
The Queen says to the Pope, "Did you know that with just one little wave of my hand I can make every English person in the crowd go wild?" He doubts it, so she shows him. Sure enough, the royal-gloved wave elicits rapture and cheering from every Englishman in the crowd.
Gradually, the cheering subsides. The Pope, not wanting to be outdone by someone wearing a worse frock and hat than he, considers what he could do. So the Pope says to the Queen,"Your Majesty, that was impressive. But did you know that with one little wave of MY hand I can make every Irish person in the crowd go crazy with joy? Their joy will not be a momentary display like that of your subjects, but will go deep into their hearts, and they will speak forever of this day and rejoice - they will recount it to their grandchildren and they to their descendants.
The Queen seriously doubts this, and says so. "One little wave of your hand and all Irish people will rejoice forever? Show me." So the Pope slapped her.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JaLPnIpQ7M0 this ma funny vid...more like a joke
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WOW i cant beLIEVE this thread is still going strong... 2 years ago when I was about to sit for my IG boards, this thread was commonly posted on by me... now im soon sitting for IB.... ohhh nostalgia :-\
i know right? :S
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1 man- Tumhe Pata Hai tumne 500 saal purani Murti tod di.
2 man- Thank God, Maine socha Ki ye nayi hai.
:D :D :D :D!!!!!!!!!!!
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A man walks into a bar and notices his friend sitting alone staring at a tiny man on the table playing the piano.
"Wow, look how small he is, where did you get him?!" Says the man.
"Oh, well there's this genie round the back of bar, and he grants you whatever wish you want."
Sure enough, the man goes round the back of the bar and there sits a genie.
"You grant wishes right?"
"Yes." replies the genie.
"Hmm, I'd like a million bucks."
Then, out of nowhere, a million ducks appear, and waddle behind the annoyed man as he goes back into the bar.
"Look, that genie gave me ducks instead of bucks!"
His friends sitting at the table replies,
"Well yeah, do you really think I asked for a twelve inch pianist?"
::)
A man sat down at a bar and told the bartender, "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can piss into the cup all the way over there on the other side of the bar and not miss a single drop."
The bartender said, "There is no way you can do that. Sure, I'll bet you three hundred dollars."
The man then begins to undo his pants and begins pissing. He starts pissing all over the bar, spraying on the bottles and the bartender, not making a single drop in the cup.
The bartender starts smiling and laughing and says, "That's it, you owe me three hundred dollars."
The man then gets up and walks over to the pool table and starts laughing and shaking hands with the men standing there. He walks back to bar, sits down and starts laughing at the bartender and hands him the money.
The bartender asks, "Why are you laughing? You just lost the bet."
The man said, "I'm laughing because I bet those guys over there one thousand dollars that I could piss all over you and your bar and you would still be laughing when I was done."
:P
Rofl..... nice one..:)
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IN LOVE WITH TEACHER
The pretty teacher was concerned with one of her eleven-year-old students. Taking him aside after class one day,she asked, "Little Johnny, why has your school work been so poor lately?"
"I'm in love," the boy replied.
Holding back an urge to smile, she asked, "With whom?"
"With YOU!" he said.
"But Johnny," she said gently, "don't you see how silly that is? It's true that I would like a husband of my own someday. But I don't want a child."
"Oh, don't worry," the boy said reassuringly, "I'll use a rubber!"
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IN LOVE WITH TEACHER
The pretty teacher was concerned with one of her eleven-year-old students. Taking him aside after class one day,she asked, "Little Johnny, why has your school work been so poor lately?"
"I'm in love," the boy replied.
Holding back an urge to smile, she asked, "With whom?"
"With YOU!" he said.
"But Johnny," she said gently, "don't you see how silly that is? It's true that I would like a husband of my own someday. But I don't want a child."
"Oh, don't worry," the boy said reassuringly, "I'll use a rubber!"
I didn't get it. =/
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Here are a couple of hilarious(In my point of view ::)) jokes I've stored for a while now..
Einstein, Newton and Pascal decide to play hide and seek. Einstein is it, closes his eyes, counts to 10 then opens them. Pascal is no where to be seen. Newton is sitting right in front of Einstein, with a piece of chalk in his hand. He's sitting in a box drawn on the ground, a meter to a side. Einstein says "Newton, you're terrible, I've found you!" Newton says "No no, Einy. You've found one Newton per square meter. You've found Pascal!"
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There is a physicist, a biologist and a mathematician standing in front of a house. They see one man enter and two men leave.
The Physicist says, "Well there is obviously an unknown variable." The Biologist says, "The man must have multiplied."
The mathematician then looks at them both and says, "I don't know how it happened but if one more person enters the house it will be empty."
-----------
I used to bad at geometry, but I turned that around 360 degrees.
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Two rednecks decided that they weren't going anywhere in life and thought they should go to college to get ahead.
The first went in to see the counselor, who told him to take math, history, and logic.
"What's logic?" the first redneck asked.
The professor answered, "Let me give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?"
"I sure do."
"Then I can assume, using logic, that you have a yard," replied the professor.
"That's real good!" said the redneck.
The professor continued, "Logic will also tell me that since you have a yard, you also own a house."
Impressed, the redneck said, "Amazing!"
"And since you own a house, logic dictates that you have a wife."
"That's Betty Mae! This is incredible!"
The redneck was catching on.
"Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can assume that you are heterosexual," said the professor.
"You're absolutely right! Why that's the most fascinatin' thing I ever heard! I cain't wait to take that logic class!"
The redneck, proud of the new world opening up to him, walked back into the hallway where his friend was still waiting.
"So what classes are ya takin'?" asked the friend.
"Math, history, and logic!" replied the first redneck.
"What in tarnation is logic?" asked his friend.
"Let me give you an example. Do ya own a weed eater?" asked the first redneck.
"No," his friend replied.
"You're gay, ain't ya?"
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Welcome Back Ahmed! Nice jokes! :D
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It's good to be back! ;D
I'm glad you liked them! I'll try and find some other jokes. :)
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Diary of a Young Wife
*Monday:*
Now home from honeymoon and settled in our new home.
It's fun to cook for Tim. Today I made an angel food cake and the recipe
said, "beat 12 eggs separately." Well, I didn't have enough bowls to do
that, so I had to borrow 12 bowls to beat the eggs in. The cake turned out
fine though.
*Tuesday:*
We wanted a fruit salad for supper. The recipe said, "Serve without
dressing." So I didn't dress. But Tim happened to bring a friend home for
supper that night. They both looked so startled when I served them; I think
it was the salad.
*Wednesday:*
I decided to serve rice and found a recipe which said, "Wash thoroughly
before steaming the rice." So I heated some water and took a bath before
steaming the rice. Sounded kinda silly in the middle of the day. I can't say
it improved the rice anyhow.
*Thursday:*
Today Tim asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe.
It said, prepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before
serving." I hunted all over the place for a garden and when I got one, I
tossed my salad into the bed of lettuce and stood over there for over one
hour so the dog would not take it. Tim came over and asked if I felt all
right.I wonder why? He must be stressed at work; I'll try to be supportive.
*Friday:*
Today I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said, "Put all ingredients in a
bowl and beat it." Beat it I did,to my mum's place. There must have been
something wrong with the recipe, because when I came back home again it
looked the same as when I left it.
*Saturday:*
Tim went shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it
for Sunday. I'm sure I don't know how hens dress for Sunday. I never noticed
back on the farm, but I found an old doll dress and it's little cute shoes.
I thought the hen looked really cute. When Tim saw it, he started counting
to ten. Either he was really stressed because of his work, or he wanted the
chicken to dance.
When I asked him what was wrong he started crying and shouting out "why me?
Why me?"
Hmmm....I guess...It must be his job.
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^Haaaaahaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ;D
Why meee? <---this was funnnny ;D
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I was in my first serious study class of anatomy... The prof was teaching and I was writing my thesis as soon as the words were absorbed by my brain... This is what I came up with by the end of the lecture...
Both a joke and a riddle; Med students will understand... :P
TO DESCRIBE A HEADACHE....
The superior part of my cranial anatomy, if observed proximally, either coronally or mid-sagitally, has an excitation of the axons and dendrites of pain receptors. This excitation lies mostly lateral to the medial line, distal from the center of the brain. Said excitation causes the proximal surface of my skull, relative to the brain, to seem to want to abduct and my brain to perform circus-like contortional circumductions.
Due to all this, I want to abduct all the fingers of my hand, flex all except the axial one, which does not abduct, and display such to the subject I have unfortunately married...
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I was in my first serious study class of anatomy... The prof was teaching and I was writing my thesis as soon as the words were absorbed by my brain... This is what I came up with by the end of the lecture...
Both a joke and a riddle; Med students will understand... :P
TO DESCRIBE A HEADACHE....
The superior part of my cranial anatomy, if observed proximally, either coronally or mid-sagitally, has an excitation of the axons and dendrites of pain receptors. This excitation lies mostly lateral to the medial line, distal from the center of the brain. Said excitation causes the proximal surface of my skull, relative to the brain, to seem to want to abduct and my brain to perform circus-like contortional circumductions.
Due to all this, I want to abduct all the fingers of my hand, flex all except the axial one, which does not abduct, and display such to the subject I have unfortunately married...
LOL ;D
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LOL ;D
Thanks! I take it as a compliment!
Though nearly none of my classmates bothered to read it.... ::)
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Thanks! I take it as a compliment!
Though nearly none of my classmates bothered to read it.... ::)
It did take a lot of reading ... Never knew you were in the medical field. :D
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It did take a lot of reading ... Never knew you were in the medical field. :D
And remembering? Its designed as a humourous revision strategy... :P
I am! I did post it somewhere... I guess...
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And remembering? Its designed as a humourous revision strategy... :P
I am! I did post it somewhere... I guess...
I'll be visiting this thread often then. :P It's an excellent strategy. :D
Hmmmm ... MBBS ? :D
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How to not pay the speed fine!!!
A guy was stopped by a cop for speeding. Watch what happens.
Driver: Yeah, why did you stop me? >:(
Cop: Do you know the speed of the road? ???
Driver: Yeah, its 60, so, I was just moving on 100. :-\
Cop: License please.
Driver: Don't have. 8)
Cop: Ha??? you are driving the car without a license, give me the car papers then :-\
Driver: Oh those I saw them when I was putting the gun ;D
Cop: And you have gun :o
Driver: yeah its the gun I killed the owner of the car with >:D, if you don't believe me look in the trunk, his body is in there.
The cop now calls for backup saying he is dealing with lunatic and needs immediate backup. Swat team comes with a high rank officer.
They check the car and they find no body and no gun as the cop reported. Now the officer talks to the driver.
Driver: Excuse me officer is anything wrong ???
Officer: I am sorry sir, it just looks like our man gave us some wrong info about you. May i see your license please?
Driver: Of course sir, here. :-\
Officer: what about the car papers?
Driver: Here sir.
Officer: I am sorry sir, its just that our cop said that u have a dead mans body in the trunk and a gun in the car, and that the car is stolen and you have no license.
Driver: What,I would like to report that cop please, I bet he said I broke the road's max speed. >:(
Hope you like this joke guys and I will put many more if you guys really like it.
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Anybody seen Rob Ford the disastrous Canadian politician? There must be a few jokes there.
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Do you know any language or translators jokes? Heres one:
Translator gets 400 words to translate.
Client : How long will it take?
Translator : About a week.
Client : A whole week for just 400 words? God created the world in 6
days.
Translator : Then just take a look at this world and afterwards take a
look at my translation.