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Author Topic: Clean jokes thread!!!  (Read 153361 times)

Offline [Ash]

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #810 on: September 06, 2010, 12:31:10 pm »
height of language misuse


Student was watching a monkey playing outside the class window


when professor suddenly notice him and scolded:

Why are u watching the monkey outside when i m in the class!!!!
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All i Ever Did Was Love...And All You Did Was Lie... Never Understood It.But Never Asked You Why!?!?

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #811 on: September 06, 2010, 02:08:01 pm »
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Offline [Ash]

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #812 on: September 06, 2010, 02:18:11 pm »
jokes which were posted above before i post mine! :)
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All i Ever Did Was Love...And All You Did Was Lie... Never Understood It.But Never Asked You Why!?!?

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #813 on: September 06, 2010, 02:20:34 pm »
Quote from: [Ash] on September 06, 2010, 02:18:11 pm
jokes which were posted above before i post mine! :)

xactly above, then mine, hindi ones?
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #814 on: September 06, 2010, 02:21:16 pm »
daru ki wajah se barbaad santa ne kasam li aur ghar se daru ki bottles fekne laga.
1st fek k bola- teri vajah se meri nokri gayi..
2nd fekte - bola teri vajah se mera ghar bika..
3rd fekte bola- teri vajah se meri BV chali gayi..
4th uthai toh wo bhari hui nikli toh bola---- tu side me ho ja isme tera koi kasoor nahi
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #815 on: September 06, 2010, 02:25:03 pm »
?? A Manager, his Assistant, one old woman and her young daughter are traveling in a train and during the course of time get themselves introduced to each other and become temporary friends. The train goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes o...ut of the tunnel. The women and the Assistant are sitting there looking perplexed. The Manager is bending over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.

The Old woman is thinking:
These Managers are all crazy after girls. He must have kissed my daughter in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him.

The Young girl is thinking:
The Manager must have tried to kiss me but kissed my mother instead and got slapped.

The Manager is thinking:
Damn it. My Assistant must have kissed the young girl. She might have thought it was me and slapped me.

The Assistant is thinking:
If this train goes through another tunnel I will make another kissing sound and slap my Manager again. He keeps harassing me in the Office.
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #816 on: September 06, 2010, 02:26:13 pm »
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #817 on: September 06, 2010, 02:27:35 pm »
Funny Doctor & patient Discussion

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, wherever I touch, it hurts."
The doctor asks, "What do you mean?"
The man says, "When I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. If I touch my knee - OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts."
...The doctor says, "I know what's wrong with you - you've broken your finger!"
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #818 on: September 06, 2010, 02:30:20 pm »
Dear Boss,
People who do lots of work... make lots of mistakes

People who do less work...
make less mistakes
...
People who do no work...
make no mistakes

People who make no mistakes...
gets promoted
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #819 on: September 06, 2010, 02:31:51 pm »
Kids and teachers hate me…

Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son.

Wake up, son. It’s time to go to school!
...
But why, Mom? I don’t want to go.

Give me two reasons why you don’t want to go.

Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!’

Oh, that’s no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready.

Give me two reasons why I should go to school.

Well, for one, you’re 52 years old. And for another, you’re the Principal!
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Offline Heart Hacker

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #820 on: September 06, 2010, 10:12:48 pm »
 8) Keep it alive  8)
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Hope for the Best .....Expect the Worst ;)

Thank Allah for everything :)

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #821 on: September 07, 2010, 02:03:58 pm »
Quote from: Heart Hacker on September 06, 2010, 10:12:48 pm
8) Keep it alive  8)

i will try to keep it alive, but no one reads here, thats bad!
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #822 on: September 07, 2010, 02:04:13 pm »
POWER OF REAL FRIENDSHIP :
A boy was late 2 home. His father "kaha tha tu?"
Boy "Friend ke yaha tha"
Father called his 10 friends.
5 answered "yes, yahi par tha!"
...3 answered "abhi just nikla hai"
2 answered "yahi hai uncle, pad raha hai. phone du kya???"
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #823 on: September 07, 2010, 02:05:09 pm »
Ek baar santa ke car ke niche ek kuta tha santa ne use dekha aur usaka poonch pakda aur khechte hue bola bada aaya automobile engineer banne!
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #824 on: September 07, 2010, 02:06:16 pm »
Sardar Ji: The people next door must be poor.
Jeeto: Why do you say that?
Sardar Ji: Bcoz they made such a fuss when d baby swallowed a 10 paisa coin.
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