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Author Topic: Clean jokes thread!!!  (Read 153577 times)

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #630 on: July 29, 2010, 07:36:45 pm »
Quote from: Kim on July 29, 2010, 07:34:56 pm
today i m not active as much as i usually am
 :-\

What happened?
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If you don't like my driving, then stay off the sidewalk

Offline Kim

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #631 on: July 29, 2010, 07:38:15 pm »
Quote from: Kheper on July 29, 2010, 07:36:45 pm
What happened?

no reason
just not feeling like it
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After all is said and done, more is said than done.

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #632 on: July 29, 2010, 07:42:13 pm »
Quote from: Kim on July 29, 2010, 07:38:15 pm
no reason
just not feeling like it

Read some jokes. ;D They work fine for me.
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Offline Kim

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #633 on: July 29, 2010, 07:43:17 pm »
Quote from: Kheper on July 29, 2010, 07:42:13 pm
Read some jokes. ;D They work fine for me.

thanks for the advice  ;)
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After all is said and done, more is said than done.

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Freaked12

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #634 on: July 29, 2010, 07:48:48 pm »
I suck.

What a joke
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Offline Kim

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #635 on: July 29, 2010, 07:50:36 pm »
english to chinese translation ::)

Are you harboring a fugitive? Hu Yu Hai Ding?

See me A.S.A.P. - Kum Hia Nao

Stupid Man - Dum Gai

Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni

Your price is too high!!! - No Bai Dam Thing!!

Did you go to the beach? - Wai Yu So Tan

I bumped into a coffee table - Ai Bang Mai Ni

I think you need a facelift - Chin Tu Fat

It's very dark in here - Wai So Dim?

Has your flight been delayed? - Hao Long Wei Ting?

I thought you were on a diet - Wai Yu Mun Ching?

This is a tow away zone - No Pah King

Do you know lyrics to the Macarena? - Wai Yu Sing Dum Song?

You are not very bright - Yu So Dum

I got this for free - Ai No Pei

I am not guilty - Wai Hang Mi?

Please, stay a while longer - Wai Go Nao?

Meeting was scheduled for next week - Wai You Kum Nao

They have arrived - Hia Dei Kum

Stay out of sight - Lei Lo

He's cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka

He is a fat man - Wun Fat Gai
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After all is said and done, more is said than done.

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #636 on: July 29, 2010, 07:57:30 pm »
Reminds me of russell peters.
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Freaked12

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #637 on: July 29, 2010, 08:14:53 pm »
Why Canada does not participate in Global Events.

Russell Peters- for obvious reasons, it is a global event.
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Offline DrEvil

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #638 on: July 30, 2010, 10:31:06 am »
Impact of job change

A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question.

The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath and stopped centimeters from a shop window.

For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said:
"Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!

The passenger apologized and said:
"I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much."

The driver replied:
"Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver - I've been driving a van carrying dead bodies for the last 25 years."
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“When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.”

Offline DrEvil

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #639 on: July 30, 2010, 10:33:16 am »
Man runs home yelling:
"Pack your bags honey. I just won the 10 Million lotto..."

Wife: "Do I pack for the beach or mountains?"

Man: "Who cares? Just pack and get lost!"
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“When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.”

Offline Heart Hacker

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #640 on: July 30, 2010, 02:05:32 pm »
Quote from: DrEvil on July 30, 2010, 10:33:16 am
Man runs home yelling:
"Pack your bags honey. I just won the 10 Million lotto..."

Wife: "Do I pack for the beach or mountains?"

Man: "Who cares? Just pack and get lost!"

lol
poor wife  :D
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Hope for the Best .....Expect the Worst ;)

Thank Allah for everything :)

***exam***

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #641 on: July 30, 2010, 03:47:22 pm »
Three women are at a house, one redhead, one brunette, and one blonde.

A genie appears and says the women can say anything, but if they tell a lie, they disappear.

The redhead says, "I think I am the smartest woman ever," and she disappears.

The brunette says, "I think I am the most beautiful woman on Earth," and she disappears.

The blonde says, "I think-" and she disappears.







Ever wonder how blondes remember their Passwords?

During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password:

MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofy

When asked why such a big password, she said, "It had to be at least 8 characters long.
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Offline Arthur Bon Zavi

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #642 on: July 31, 2010, 03:32:00 pm »
how'z this @KEY::

when i get older, i will be fatter, then call me khusath, just like the bhaibandh friend....just lik the bhibandh.......
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Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #643 on: July 31, 2010, 03:33:28 pm »
Quote from: theonlyone on July 31, 2010, 03:32:00 pm
how'z this @KEY::

when i get older, i will be fatter, then call me khusath, just like the bhaibandh friend....just lik the bhibandh.......

fantastic, replace khusath with some nice word
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Offline Arthur Bon Zavi

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #644 on: July 31, 2010, 03:35:58 pm »
Quote from: master_key on July 31, 2010, 03:33:28 pm
fantastic, replace khusath with some nice word

moti
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