Author Topic: Clean jokes thread!!!  (Read 153549 times)

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #615 on: July 29, 2010, 02:15:30 pm »
I did , but tbh i didn't like them much ..srry.

i just asked 4 the anthem (song) nothing else.

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #616 on: July 29, 2010, 02:15:51 pm »
Nice drevil. :D +rep.
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Offline DrEvil

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #617 on: July 29, 2010, 02:16:34 pm »
One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, ".... and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!"

The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?"

One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy sh*t! A talking chicken!'"

=======================================================


Little Johnny walks up to his Aunt and says , "my God, Aunt Edna why are you so damn ugly?"

His mother overheard this and pulled Johnny into the kitchen. and screamed, "how could you say to your aunt is so damn ugly!

"Because she is," said Little Johnny.

His mother said, "You go back in there and apologize to her, right now! I mean it, you tell her you're sorry!"

Little Johnny goes into the living room, walked over to his aunt and said, "Aunt Edna, I am sorry you're so damn ugly."

=========================================================



“When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.”

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #618 on: July 29, 2010, 02:18:26 pm »
LOL.
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Offline The Golden Girl =D

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #619 on: July 29, 2010, 02:21:51 pm »
i just asked 4 the anthem (song) nothing else.

I LUBed the song tbh  :D :D
Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest(13:28)

Please, Don't forget to Include GG in your Prayers =D

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #620 on: July 29, 2010, 02:44:15 pm »
here is another joke if u know hindi then u would understan.

Chichora was crying,Father came n askd him d reasn:Beta y r u cryin ? Tel me i m ur friend my son

Chichora Beta:Yaar kya batau maine horlicks thori zyada mang li aur teri wali mujhe marne lag gayi...

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #621 on: July 29, 2010, 02:45:45 pm »
thiss one is 4 all

LOGIC QUESTIONS.

1.Wen will a horse hve 6 legs ?
2.Wen does monday cum b4 sunday?
3.Where do u find a lot of cities but not a single house ?
...4.How can u double ur money ?

THINK BEFORE U SEE ANS

AMAZING ANSWERS.

1.Wen sum1 rides d horse.
2.In a dictionary.
3.In a map.
4.Show it in front of mirror. gudmrng.

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #622 on: July 29, 2010, 02:47:13 pm »
After doing mistakeAlways listen to your parents..they give u sound advise...
99 percent sound nd 1 percent advise :P

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #623 on: July 29, 2010, 02:49:03 pm »
Paddy buys two Goldfish and names them 1 and 2. Mick asks "Why did you name them 1 and 2?" Paddy replies "Well if 1 dies I still have 2 left!" :P :P :P

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #624 on: July 29, 2010, 03:37:53 pm »
After doing mistakeAlways listen to your parents..they give u sound advise...
99 percent sound nd 1 percent advise :P

true 1 :P

Offline Arthur Bon Zavi

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #625 on: July 29, 2010, 05:49:17 pm »
Sound Advice...haha  :P :P

Continuous efforts matter more than the outcome.
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Offline Kim

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #626 on: July 29, 2010, 06:32:39 pm »
lessons in logic

If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
it's your stupidity.

I was born intelligent -
education ruined me.

Practice makes perfect.
But nobody's perfect
so why practice?

If it's true that we are here to help others,
then what exactly are the others here for?

Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.

How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?

Money is not everything.
There's MasterCard & Visa.

One should love animals.
They are so tasty.

Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.

Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.

The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become otherwise.

Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.

Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.

"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep.

There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning.

"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk.

"Work fascinates me"
I can look at it for hours.

God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.

The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So... why learn.

A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
what more can I say.
After all is said and done, more is said than done.

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Offline Kim

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #627 on: July 29, 2010, 07:31:07 pm »
The teacher of the Earth Science class was lecturing on map reading. He spent the class explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes. Towards the end of class, the teacher asked his students, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude..." A student's voice broke the confused silence, and volunteered, "I guess you'd be eating alone, sir."


A guy is driving down a deserted highway. He pulls up to an intersection, and rolls through the stop sign. From out of nowhere, a cop pulls him over.

COP: "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
GUY: "Hey, I slowed down didn't I???"
COP: "You must come to a full stop at the sign."
GUY: "Stop. Slow down. What's the difference?"
The cop pulls out his baton and starts to beat the guy with-out mercy.
COP: "Well, do you want me to STOP or SLOW DOWN?"
After all is said and done, more is said than done.

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #628 on: July 29, 2010, 07:33:25 pm »
Lol. So daydreamer is finally active. ::) :P Nice.
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Offline Kim

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #629 on: July 29, 2010, 07:34:56 pm »
Lol. So daydreamer is finally active. ::) :P Nice.

today i m not active as much as i usually am
 :-\
After all is said and done, more is said than done.

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.