JOKES AND Riddles!!

[sanity_master]

Walks Into a Bar... The Hamster Show
   


A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he'll give him a free beer for an amazing trick. The bartender agrees. The guy pulls out a hamster that begins dancing and singing.

"That is amazing!" says the bartender and gives him a beer.

"If I show you something else, will you give me another beer?" The bartender agrees.

The guy pulls out a small piano and a frog. The same hamster plays the piano while the frog dances and sings.

The bartender, completely wowed, gives him another beer.

A man in a suit, who's been watching the entire time, offers to buy the frog for a large sum, and the man agrees.

"Are you nuts?" asks the bartender. "You could've made a fortune off that frog."

"Can you keep a secret?" asks the man. "The hamster's a ventriloquist."

[Exam_Terrified]

hahahahhahahahaha......that duck is hilarious  hahahha


i know its weird or funny for me laughing at my jokes lol hahhaa

lool. that duck is on drugs !! i can imagine it, i swear !

[sanity_master]

hahahahhahahahaha......that duck is hilarious  hahahha


i know its weird or funny for me laughing at my jokes lol hahhaa

lool. that duck is on drugs !! i can imagine it, i swear !

hahahahhahaha........i can imagine it too.....LOL!!

[Exam_Terrified]

hahahahhahahahaha......that duck is hilarious  hahahha


i know its weird or funny for me laughing at my jokes lol hahhaa

lool. that duck is on drugs !! i can imagine it, i swear !

if i say this u might think i'm on drugs too (lol) , bt that really gave me a hint 4 my new e-mail.
drugged_duck .. lmao. i wanted sth totally random and weird, & it has been killing me that i can't find anything .
eh, if i dont come up with something else. am definitely gonna do it that.


hahahahhahaha........i can imagine it too.....LOL!!

[sanity_master]

Walks Into a Bar... Vampires
   


Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have a pint of blood."

The second one says, "I'll have one, too."

The third one says, "I'll have a pint of plasma."

The bartender says, "So, that'll be two Bloods and a Blood Lite?"

[sanity_master]

well, i g2g now......i will post more jokes later....


Take care, and gd luck!

[Exam_Terrified]

well, i g2g now......i will post more jokes later....


Take care, and gd luck!

buh-bye . gd luck 2 u 2 if ur taking physics.

[sanity_master]

well, i g2g now......i will post more jokes later....


Take care, and gd luck!

buh-bye . gd luck 2 u 2 if ur taking physics.

i dont take physcis...im gonna post few more jokes (im in the mood) lol

[sanity_master]

r we the only ones online??


mony (shushou) is online but not posting......

[sanity_master]

Cheerleading Tryouts
   

One day two girls were trying out for the school cheerleading squad. One was a blonde and one was a brunette. After they both had tryouts, they went home to wait until the results were posted. The blonde goes to see if she made it that night. Once she found out she made it she got out her cell phone and called the brunette, but she didn't answer, so the blonde just went back home. The next day the brunette called the blonde to see if she wanted to go with her to look at their scores. The blonde says sure and meets the brunette at the school. The brunette beats the blonde to the school, so she goes ahead and looks at the scores to find out they both made it. When the blonde gets there, she finds her name on the list again. Then she says, ''Yes!! I made it again, I made it last night and I made it again today. I am on a roll!''

[sanity_master]

Nouveau Riche Blonde


There was this nouveau riche blond girl, who went to the nearest Mercedes showroom with a pocketful of dollars, and came out with the latest model.

Half an hour later she was back at the showroom, claiming a that the car they sold her was terrible, that she was disappointed a brand-new Mercedes would get a fault in the gearbox after 15 minutes. The management apologized and gave her a new car.

Again, after half an hour she came back. The management offered her a new car, but sent along one of their engineers to see if they could figure out what the problem was. She put in the first gear... sped up... put in second... third... fourth... fifth.... “And now,” she said, “for the rocket,” and threw it in reverse.





hahahhah3hh3ahahahahhahahahhaa...........

[sanity_master]

Heckle Me Harder


A ventriloquist is sitting onstage at a comedy club. He and his dummy are spurting out really crude blonde jokes, when a blonde lady sitting in the audience stands up.

"I'm so sick of you people who think blondes are stupid. It's because of you that I have had to try harder to prove myself at work and in the community. There are just as many dumb people with red or brown hair. There are just as many smart people with blonde hair."

"Gosh, Miss, I'm terribly sorry. I was just telling jokes, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

"Shut up! I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to that little jerk on your lap!"

[sanity_master]

Q: What did the blonde  fill in for Salary Expected out the job application?




A: Yes.

[Exam_Terrified]

r we the only ones online??


mony (shushou) is online but not posting......

lool . then post ! u dont take physics.?? neyalak ya 3ame. yeah, i think soo. its like a desert !

hey, did she get mad at me or sth , when i replied bout that thing there about she saying 'he looks ...' .
did i make it appear ino she was wrong bout saying that ?? i swear i was jst trying to expel the tension.
no more, no less.

[sanity_master]

r we the only ones online??


mony (shushou) is online but not posting......

lool . then post ! u dont take physics.?? neyalak ya 3ame. yeah, i think soo. its like a desert !

hey, did she get mad at me or sth , when i replied bout that thing there about she saying 'he looks ...' .
did i make it appear ino she was wrong bout saying that ?? i swear i was jst trying to expel the tension.
no more, no less.

dont worry.....im sure she is not mad......