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JOKES AND Riddles!!
Nobody:
The student - "how many children do you have , Madam?"
The teacher - "I have two daughters both are girls."
Nobody:
Two men are sitting drinking at a bar at the top of the Empire State Building when the first man turns to the other and says, "You know, last week I discovered that if you jump from the top of this building, by the time you fall to the 10th floor, the winds around the building are so intense that they carry you around the building and back into the window."
The bartender just shakes his head in disapproval while wiping the bar.
The second guy says, "What are you a nut? There is no way that could happen."
"No, it's true," said the first man, let me prove it to you." He gets up from the bar,
jumps over the balcony, and plummets to the street below. When he passes the 10th floor,
the high wind whips him around the building and back into the 10th floor window and
he takes the elevator back up to the bar.
He met the second man, who looked quite astonished. "You know, I saw that with my own eyes, but that must have been a one time fluke."
"No, I'll prove it again," says the first man as he jumps. Again just as he is hurling toward the street, the 10th floor wind gently carries him around the building and into the window.
Once upstairs he urges his fellow drinker to try it. "Well, what the hey," the second guy says, "it works, I'll try it!" He jumps over the balcony plunges downward, passes the 11th, 10th, 9th, 8th floors ...and hits the sidewalk with a 'splat.' Back upstairs the Bartender turns to the other drinker, saying "You know, Superman, sometimes you can be a real jerk."
guMnam:
A dog, a cat, and a penis are sitting around a camp fire one night. The dog says, "My life sucks, my master makes me do my business on a fire hydrent!". The cat says, "I don't think so, my master makes me do my business in a box of cat litter." The penis outraged, says "At least your master doesn't put a bag over your head and make you do push ups until you throw up!"
::) ;)
guMnam:
here is another....
There was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant.
So, he went to the doctor to have a sperm count done.
The doctor told him to take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back the next day.
The elderly man came back the next day and the specimen cup was empty and the lid was on it. Doctor: What was the problem?
Elderly man: Well, I tried with my right hand...nothing. So, I tried with my left hand...nothing. My wife tried with her right hand...nothing. Her left hand...nothing. Her mouth...nothing. Then my wife's friend tried. Right hand, left hand, mouth....still nothing.
Doctor: Wait a minute. You mean your wife's friend too?!
Elderly man: Yeah, and we still couldn't get the lid off of the specimen cup.
immortal:
--- Quote from: Nobody on May 26, 2010, 09:33:13 am ---The student - "how many children do you have , Madam?"
The teacher - "I have two daughters both are girls."
--- End quote ---
Today i fell of da road & i started bleeding blood...LOL :D
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