Author Topic: Clean jokes thread!!!  (Read 136696 times)

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #930 on: September 20, 2010, 01:53:51 pm »
 Laloo
and his wife Rabri were angry with each other and were not talking to
each other.
Laloo left a note on Rabri's bedside table, that said: "Dear
Wife! Awake me at 5 am tomorrow."
...Next morning,
Laloo awoke at 8 am and
saw a note on his bedside table: "Dear Husband It's 5 O' Clock, get up.

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #931 on: September 20, 2010, 01:54:13 pm »
Santa:-Agar Teri Bivi Ko Bhootni Lipat Jaye, To Tu Kya Karega?
Banta:-Mujhe Kya Karna ! Ye Do Behno Ka Aapsi Mamla Hai

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #932 on: September 20, 2010, 01:55:03 pm »
Nurse: Apke judwa bete hue hai
Santa: Ye to hona hi tha, program hi aie dekhti thi...
KBC2
INDIAN IDOL2
NACH BALIYE2
...DHOOM2
Nurse: Accha hua Roadies 7 nai dekha!!!!!

Offline iluvme

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #933 on: September 20, 2010, 05:16:09 pm »
After teaching my little sister, her poem for her school concert she was quite ready. The next day,my cousins came over and wanted her to recite the poem for them. Before she recited, I suggested that she could bow after the poem.
I totally wasn't ready to face what came after the recitation, taking my suggestion my sister went 'BOW!!'
I believe in killing the messenger. Know why? It sends  message.
~Damon Salvatore~

Offline Twinkle Charms

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #934 on: September 20, 2010, 05:53:57 pm »
After teaching my little sister, her poem for her school concert she was quite ready. The next day,my cousins came over and wanted her to recite the poem for them. Before she recited, I suggested that she could bow after the poem.
I totally wasn't ready to face what came after the recitation, taking my suggestion my sister went 'BOW!!'
haha  so very cutee  :D
You See - You like - You try - You fail meanwhile I see - I like - I want - I get!

La Fata Illa Ali, La Saif Illa Zulfikar . (:

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #935 on: September 21, 2010, 06:48:54 pm »
Question: What is "IT"?

Astronomers do IT all night.
Chemists do IT by bonding.
Newton did IT with force.
Eighteenth century physicists did IT with rigid bodies.
Maxwell did IT with magnetism.
Volta did IT with a jolt.
Watt did IT with power.
Joule did IT with energy.
Ohm did IT with resistance.
Pascal did IT under pressure.
Hooke did IT using springs.
Coulomb got all charged up about IT.
Hertz did IT frequently.
Boltzmann did IT in heat.
Ampere let IT flow.
For Franklin, IT was an electrifying experience.
Edison claims to have invented IT.
When Richter did IT, the Earth shook.
For Darwin, IT was natural.
Freud did IT in his sleep.
Mendel studied the consequences of IT.
When Wegener did IT, continents moved.
Classical physicists do IT in perfectly uniform harmonic motion.
Heisenberg was never sure whether he even did IT.
Bohr did IT in an excited state.
Pauli did IT but excluded his friends.
Schrödinger did IT in waves.
Bose did IT with partners.
Einstein did IT on a curved surface.
Oort did IT in a cloud.
Hubble did IT in the dark.
Watson and Crick got all wound up about IT.
Cosmologists do IT in a big bang.
Theorists do IT on paper.
Wigner did IT in a group.
Richter and Ting did IT with charm.
Astrophysicists do IT with young starlets.
Planetary scientists do IT with Uranus.
Electron microscopists do IT 100,000 times.
Feynman did IT in fields.
Hawking wrote a brief history of IT.
And supersymmetric theorists do IT with sleptons.









Answer: IT = science, of course.
If you don't like my driving, then stay off the sidewalk

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #936 on: September 23, 2010, 02:35:31 pm »
After failing in exam in " Logistic and Organisation " , Salman goes to his lecturer....
Salman : Sir, do you understand the subject urself?
Prof : Surely, i must. otherwise i wud not b a Professor!
Salman : I wud like 2 ask a question. If you give the answer correctly, I will accept my marks & go. If u dont knw the answer..., you give me an A grade..
Prof : ok... wats the question??
Salman : wat is legal, but not logical, logical but not legal and neither logical nor legal?
The professor cudnt give the answer and changes his exam mark into an A...
Prof : Now tell the answer...!
Salman : Sir you are 63 year old and married to a 25 year ld woman which is legal but not logical. your wife has a 19 year old lover which is logical but not legal. you have given your wife's lover an "A" although he should have failed, its neither legal nor logical...!!!!
Professor Shocked...!!!! :D

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #937 on: September 23, 2010, 02:36:10 pm »
raat k pehloo mein, chand sitaare chhaye hain...
.
.
raat k pehloo mein, chand taare chhaye hain...
.
....
Madam Darwaza Kholiye Hum CID Se Aaye Hain..

waah waaaaaaah :P

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #938 on: September 23, 2010, 02:38:16 pm »
CID SHAYARI...Again...;-)

Meri gardan me dard aur gale me kharash hai.....

Wah Wah....
...
Meri gardan me dard aur gale me kharash hai..

Oh my god Daya, yaha pe ek laash hai...! B-)

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #939 on: September 23, 2010, 02:40:58 pm »
?6 Truths of Life....

1. U cant touch all ur teeth with ur tongue....

2. All idiots, aftr reading the 1st truth, will try it....
...
3. And discover dat d 1st truth is a lie.....

4.Ur smiling now cos ur an idiot....

5.U soon wil forward this 2 another idiot....

6.Ders stil a stupid smile on ur face.....

I apologise about this, but I needed company....:P


Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #940 on: September 23, 2010, 02:41:22 pm »
Aik admi apni biwi ko dafna kay ghar ja raha tha ki achanak....

bijli chamki,

badal garje,
...
jor se baarish shuru hui....

Toh dukhi aadmi bola : " Lagta hai pahunch gai..."

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #941 on: September 23, 2010, 02:42:15 pm »
Glass tute to kya awaj aati hai ???

Crush ???

No...!
...
Crish...?

No...!

Thish...?

Arre Nahi yar......

Mummy ki awaj ati hai...

" Tod do jaanvaro sab tod do kuch mat chorna is ghar me !! "

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #942 on: September 23, 2010, 02:46:52 pm »
What did the mother kangaroo say when she found her baby missin...???
.
.
.
.
....
.
.
.
" Aila ! Meri pocket kisne maari...??? "

Offline Master_Key

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #943 on: September 23, 2010, 02:47:17 pm »
What did the mother kangaroo say when she found her baby missin...???
.
.
.
.
....
.
.
.
" Aila ! Meri pocket kisne maari...??? "

Offline I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!

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Re: Clean jokes thread!!!
« Reply #944 on: September 23, 2010, 06:16:00 pm »
 Meri pocket kisne marii!!
 
Lol.
If you don't like my driving, then stay off the sidewalk