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JOKES AND Riddles!!
$tyli$h Executive:
ALWAYS THERE FOR ME
This woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me through all the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"
"What dear," she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.
"I think you're bad luck....."
$tyli$h Executive:
THE MARRIAGE FAIRY
A couple had been married for 25 years and was celebrating the husband's 60th birthday.
During the party, a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all those years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife said, "We've been so poor all these years, and I've never gotten to see the world. I wish we could travel all over the world." The fairy waved her wand and POOF! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, and then said, "Well, I'd like to be married to a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy waved her wand and POOF! He was 90.
Heart Hacker:
--- Quote from: $tyli$h Executive on July 09, 2010, 05:20:50 pm ---THE MARRIAGE FAIRY
A couple had been married for 25 years and was celebrating the husband's 60th birthday.
During the party, a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all those years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife said, "We've been so poor all these years, and I've never gotten to see the world. I wish we could travel all over the world." The fairy waved her wand and POOF! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, and then said, "Well, I'd like to be married to a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy waved her wand and POOF! He was 90.
--- End quote ---
ahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
AWESOME !!!
cnt stop laughing !!
The Golden Girl =D:
hahaha lol
$tyli$h Executive:
DICTIONARY OF DATING
ATTRACTION... the act of associating horniness with a particular person.
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT... what occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet.
DATING... the process of spending enormous amounts of money, time and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don't especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future.
BIRTH CONTROL... avoiding pregnancy through such tactics as swallowing special pills, inserting a diaphragm, using a condom, and dating repulsive men.
EASY... a term used to describe a woman who has the sexual morals of a man.
EYE CONTACT... a method utilized by one person to indicate that they are interested in another. Despite being advised to do so, many men have difficulty looking a woman directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to shyness, but usually due to the fact that a woman's eyes are not located in her chest.
FRIEND... a person in your acquaintance who has some flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.
INDIFFERENCE... a woman's feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by the man to be "playing hard to get".
INTERESTING... a word a man uses to describe a woman who lets him do all the talking.
IRRITATING HABIT... what the endearing little qualities that initially attract two people to each other turn into after a few months together.
LAW OF RELATIVITY... how attractive a given person appears to be is directly proportionate to how unattractive your date is.
NYMPHOMANIAC... a man's term for a woman who wants to have sex more often than he does.
SOBER... condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love.
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