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JOKES AND Riddles!!
dodi23:
ya true..
The Golden Girl =D:
--- Quote from: dodi23 on June 09, 2010, 01:27:32 pm ---ya true..
--- End quote ---
someone s with me ,see! ::) ::)
dodi23:
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs, "I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!" The four men didn't wait for a second threat. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then she realized why. It was for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a Frisbee, and two 12-packs of beer in the front seat. A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed. Moral of the story? If you're going to have a senior moment...make it memorable.
The Golden Girl =D:
--- Quote from: dodi23 on June 09, 2010, 01:29:24 pm ---An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs, "I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!" The four men didn't wait for a second threat. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then she realized why. It was for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a Frisbee, and two 12-packs of beer in the front seat. A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed. Moral of the story? If you're going to have a senior moment...make it memorable.
--- End quote ---
man that's so hilarious ...it's soo funy :D :D
dodi23:
Q. What's the difference between a man and E.T.?
A. E.T. phoned home.
Q. How do men get excersize at the beach?
A. By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
Q. What's a man's idea of helpin with the housework?
A. Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.
Q. Why are all dumb blond jokes oneliners?
A. So men can understand them.
Q. How do women define a 50/50 relationship?
A. We cook/they eat; We clean/they dirty; We iron/ they wrinkle.
Q. What is the difference between government bonds and men?
A. Government bonds mature.
Q. How are men like noodles?
A. They are always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need dough.
Q. Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women?
A. When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there.
Q. Why is it good that there are female astronauts?
A. When the crew gets lost in space at least the women will ask for directions.
Q. What does a man consider to be a seven course meal?
A. A hot dog and a six pack.
Q. What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?
A. Put the remote control between his toes.
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