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JOKES AND Riddles!!
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
Another ;) Am I cool or what? 8) 8)
There is an Englishman, American, and an Australian. All 3 are dared to stay in a haunted house for 1 night. So the American walks in and hears this voice: I'm gonna get ya, I'm gonna eat ya! The American ran out of the house screaming and died of a panic attack. The Australian walks in and hears the same voice: I'm gonna get ya, I'm gonna eat ya! The Australian jumps out of the window and dies. The Englishman walks in and hears the same voice: I'm gonna get ya, I'm gonna eat ya! The Englishman realises the voice is coming from a closed cupboard. So he walks over and opens the cupboard. Sitting there is a monkey picking his nose saying: I'm gonna get ya, I'm gonna eat ya!
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
I'm bored.... I miss someone....:( tell me a joke.... :(
If not then I'll tell myself one!!!! :)
1.A female teacher in a school said to the 10 yrs student , "if you Answer the question , I'll kiss you" He said " would you sleep with me if i do the homework ? "
2.why does a blond turn the care upside down ?
to figure out if it is female or male.
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
Another one ;D
A couple is lying in bed, on their 20th wedding anniversary. The woman suddenly feels her husband touching her in ways that he hadn't done in years. He started at her neck, and slowly traced a line downward, past the small of her back. He caressed one shoulder, then the other, and continued down across her breasts, stopping just below her navel.
Next, he placed his hand on her left inner arm, and caressed down her side, stopping at her hip. He started over again on her right side, then brushed gently across her buttocks, and down her leg. As his hand was making its way up the inside of her left leg, he abruptly stopped and rolled over.
She had become very aroused by all of this attention, and asked in a loving voice, "That was amazing, darling. Why did you stop?"
He cleared his throat, looked at her and said "Found the remote."
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
No offence to anyone, especially girls.... It's a good one ;)
Thre are 3 blondes stranded on an island.A genie comes and grants them a wish each.The first blond asks to be smart.She turns into a brunette and she swims off.The second blonde asks to be even smarter so he turns her into a ginger haired person and she builds a boat and sails away.The third blonde asks to be even smarter,so the genie turns her into a man and he walks over the bridge!!!!
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
Its a joke containing rude words so I'm gonna BLEEEEEEEEEEP it!!!! :P
A guy walks into a disco at a friend's house when he notices an armless and legless woman sitting in a corner. Feeling sorry for her, he walks up to her and says:
"Hi, I was just wondering, have you ever been kissed before?"
The woman replies, "No...", so the gentleman kisses her.
Then he asks, "Have you ever been felt up before?"
The woman smiles and once again replies, "No...", so, of course, the guy feels her up.
Suddenly the strange man asks, "Have you ever been f**ked before?"
Surprised but some-what excited at what is yet to come, the lady replies, "No..."
So, the guy picks her up, takes her outside, throws her in the pool and says, "Now you're f**ked!"
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