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JOKES AND Riddles!!
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
No offence alright? Its meant to be a joke!!! ::) :P
A woman was walking down the street with her boob hanging out her top a man comes up and says sorry to tell you this but your boob is hangin out and she cries 'ohh no i have left the baby on the bus'
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
There were three people one blonde headed, orange and green headed.
They went to the bar to get a drink. The blond headed asked for a drink but the bartender said only if you tell me how your hair got that hair colour . He said its natural.
The orange head dude came and said can i have a drink of water but the bartender said only if you tell me how you got that hair colour and he said i dyed it.
Then the green head dude asked for a drink and the bartender said only if you tell me how you got that hair colour and he rubbed his noise and stroked his hair and said i don't know.
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
Another... No offence ::) :P
A man, who smelled like a distillery, flopped down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and
began reading.
After a few minutes the disheveled man turned to the priest and said, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?"
"Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap wicked women, too much alcohol, and a contempt for your fellow man."
"Well, I'll be damned," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized.
"I'm very sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
"I don't have it, Father. I was just reading that the Pope does."
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
Another one about adam and eve...woo woo :P :P
Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands. When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
"You're running around with other women," she charged.
"You're being unreasonable," Adam responded. "You're the only woman on earth."
The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.
"What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
"Counting your ribs!"
I'm a mistake - legalize abortion!:
Another one!!!! 8) 8)
There are four people in the carriage of a train - an Englishman, a pretty young blonde girl, an ugly old woman and a Frenchman.
It all goes dark when the train goes through a tunnel. In the dark there's the sound of an almighty slap, and when the train emerges from the tunnel the Frenchman is rubbing his face, and there's a huge red mark on his cheek.
The old lady thinks "I bet that Frenchman fondled the blonde in the dark and she slapped him" The pretty young blonde thinks "I bet the Frenchman tried to fondle me in the dark, got the old lady by mistake, and she hit him" The Frenchman thinks "I bet that Englishman fondled the blonde in the dark, but the blonde thought it was me and hit me"
The Englishman thinks "I hope there's another tunnel coming up soon so I can slap that French tw@t again"
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