i love yo mama jokes :D
best lame jokes ever !!!
hahahaha q80
Yo Mama's so stupid she stole a free sample.
haha :P
i gtg now .. i lose :P
thx 4 sparing us this awkward moment roxy hehehe
hehehe .. dude, u cn always knw what point its getting to 4rm the beginning .. :P
LOL..!! THis is what it reminded me of :
so this one is talking about a girls first time:
As you lie back your muscles tighten. You put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you.
He asks if you're afraid and you shake your head bravely. He has had more experience, but it's the first time his finger has found the right place.
He probes deeply and you shiver; your body tenses; but he's gentle like he promised he'd be.
He looks deeply within your eyes and tells you to trust him-he's done this many times before.
His cool smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him more room for an ease entrance. You begin to plead and beg him to hurry, but he slowly takes his time, wanting to cause you as little pain as possible. As he presses closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give way; pain surges throughout your body and you feel the slight trickle of blood as he continues. He looks at you concerned and asks you if it's too painful. Your eyes are filled with tears but you shake your head and nod for him to go on. He begins going in and out with skill but you are now too numb to feel him within you.
After a few moments, you feel something bursting within you and he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to have it over. He looks at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a chuckle; that you have been his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.
You smile and thank your dentist. After all, it was your first time to have a tooth pulled.
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLL..!!!
I think I should stop now :P
hahahahahahhahaha omer ...
yeah, right ...
shushhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! :P
hehehe .. no !!
OMER, YEAH PROB U WERE THE 1ST ONE TO THNK OF THT OTHER THNG .. YA3NI UR A GUY!!
what else cn be expected .. :P
hehehe .. no !!
OMER, YEAH PROB U WERE THE 1ST ONE TO THNK OF THT OTHER THNG .. YA3NI UR A GUY!!
what else cn be expected .. :P
what else can be expected....... that i figured out its a dentist all along before yall :P
By the way, what is this "OTHER" thing you two are talking about? and whats so sick about dentists? or do you people consider oral hygiene as a sickening thing? ???
goashhhhhh gals are so dirty minded, and the worst thing is they cover it up by saying GUYS are ditry minded, have the guys defending themselves, and forget about who is REALLY dirty minded! :P
Yo mama is so fat i missed an entire season ofLAAAAAAAAAWWWWWLLL !!! :P :P :PDesperate HousewivesGossip girl when she passed the living room
(p.s. why do so many guys watch gossip girl (including me) and yet find Desperate Housewives girly, even though its more Criminalish and COmical than girly ??? )
nawwww mate... we're pretty cleaaaan compared to you guys..
I can give examples, but it'll just make it worse so LOLL..!! Imma just shut up now LOOOOOOOOOOOLL..!!
Yo mama is so fat i missed an entire season ofDesperate HousewivesGossip girl when she passed the living room
(p.s. why do so many guys watch gossip girl (including me) and yet find Desperate Housewives girly, even though its more Criminalish and COmical than girly ??? )
LAAAAAAAAAWWWWWLLL !!! :P :P :P
you DO NOT understand how much Im crackkinggg up loooooooooolll.
and who said it aint girly for guys to watch gilmore .. OF COURSE IT ISSS :P LOLLL..!!
i was talking about Gossip Girl not gilmore girls
gilmore girls was for the joke only :P
loll..!!
I dont believe guys should watch Gossip, there minds wander off waaaay too mcuhh LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLL..!!! :P
whooppss. we're back to square one :P
I rest my case :P
LOOOOOL..!!
I dont belive youu :P
you're a guy, and there;s no difference b/t ur mind, and another guys minddd LOOOOOOOLL..!! :P
lets take over Turkey, and name it Chicken
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLL..!!!
no no no name it KFC :P
loll..!!
and LOL guys.. this cracckkked me up:
Let's thank the guy who looked at the chicken and said, "Hey! let's eat the next thing that falls out of it's A**..."
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLL...!!!!
OMGGGGGGGGGOSHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHA I cant stop laugingggggggggggggggggggg
LOOOOOOLL..!!
dont you guys find it funny, cuz I am fallling off my bedd literally LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLL..!!
na am on a table
loooooooool omg .. ur table bed convo is so lame .. hehehe
loooooooooooooooooool .. my head hurts nw ..
loll..!! I knowww.. guys I swear arre SOOO disgustingg... There minds.. Yalllah, I wouldnt be able to live with a mind as sick as theirs :P
Dirty Little Kenny is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the teacher calls his name.
"Yeah teach?" he replies.
"If there are three ducks on a fence and you shoot one of them with a shotgun, how many are left?" asks the teacher.
Kenny answers "Well, teach, if I shoot one of them with a shotgun, the loud noise is gonna make them all fly off."
"No, Kenny, there will be two left if you shoot one with a shotgun, but I like the way you're thinking." the teacher responds.
"Well, teach, I've got a question for you... There are 3 women that come out of an ice-cream parlor, one is biting her ice-cream cone, one is licking it, and one is sucking on it. Which one is married?"
The teacher, a little taken back by the question answers, "Well, uh, gee Kenny, I guess the one that's sucking on the ice cream."
Kenny replies "No teach, the one that has the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking!"
Sorry Roxy i saw that after i moved it :P
u are so lazy to change boards ::) :P
I am the Moderator of the Chit-Chat section and this thread goes with another board...
:P :P :P
By the way one question i had post in
heres the question:
one day an old man returns from jogging with a police!!
he tells police that he forgot his way back home!!
his wife asks hmo past 30 years you have been joggign and how come did you forget your way???
tell the old man's answer!!
N1 q80. What country you in atm?
kid: what do you feel is kuwait better or Dubai!!!????
man: hmm...!! i guess kabristan is better!!! - i thisnk graveyard is better!!!
:-[ :P
THAT was the joke .. no wonder its in the Lame Jokes :P lol
Mdm. Mony: The lame jokes is going to be moved to the Humor thread
Sir Q80BOY: Well technically, Lame isnt considered Humour
Mdm. Mony: I dont care if theres a crocodile in ur bathroom, im busy
Sir Q80BOY: I spoke to my lawyer and he's going to open a case Madam Mony, you dont mess with me got it?!
*Q80BOY leaves Mony's office slamming the door*
Mdm. Mony: Come back, I forgot to slap you!!
Sir Q80BOY: Slap my lawyer!
Mdm. Mony: How rude!!!Look out for the next episode of "Slap the Law"
:P
Post it in my Jokes and Riddles thread when u remember..
:P :P
aha..so u invented it...
share with us plz ..let us hear ur lameness :P :P
I am so lame in this thread :P
Meow
What do you do when a 200 pound cat is chasing you?
Answer my lame riddle plz..
and Roxy hahaha..i am laughing at how lame it is
now if you really wanna know what lame is then here we go :
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent
;P
Meow
What do you do when a 200 pound cat is chasing you?
Answer my lame riddle plz..
and Roxy hahaha..i am laughing at how lame it is
now if you really wanna know what lame is then here we go :
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent
;P
you think thats lame you should listen to arabic joked most of em are in that league, oh yea lame jokes:
3 peeps were smoking weed, police came to catch them, one guys hides under the stairs, another one goes behind the stairs, the third one hid in the police car, HAHAHAHAHAHA, :P
you think thats lame you should listen to arabic joked most of em are in that league, oh yea lame jokes:
3 peeps were smoking weed, police came to catch them, one guys hides under the stairs, another one goes behind the stairs, the third one hid in the police car, HAHAHAHAHAHA, :P
there was one thief,cmon give answers fast.
the police caught him and they were taking them to jail in their police jeep.
the thief was so happy that he started laughing and smiling
why??
ya you have post same thing in math jokes!!
didnt understand it!!!
well Rox, look up theres this nice link thats called "Show new replies to your posts."
use it :P
ohh..!!
i am not apj master!!
i did not know that police no. is 999 i thought it to be 100!!!
i am not sid!
to wake up!!
i am wide awake!!
currently the cieling is!!
when i go to terrace then the sky will be!! :P :P
so wassup to you mani!!???
Don't know.
Currently her legs.
::) ::) ::)SPamm :P
:Pmy point exactly
Two flies were sitting on a toilet seat, one got pissed off.
Hahaha! not bad huh? :D ;)
Two flies were sitting on a toilet seat, one got pissed off.nah nt soo bad :P :P
Hahaha! not bad huh? :D ;)
Two flies were sitting on a toilet seat, one got pissed off.
Hahaha! not bad huh? :D ;)
What do you call a sleeping cow???
lol...no...it's a Bulldozer :P :P :P
ok now this one....you require 999 bricks to make a house..there r 1000...so 1 extra...what do u do with the xtra one??
Rather throw it :P :P :P
ok another one
A cat is crossing the street...no traffic...it suddenly dies...how???
a hunter shot the cat
sorry u guys fail
the brick that was thrown away hits the cat and causes brain Hemorrhage and instantaneous death :P
It's brain gets teleported to another dimension by some outer-space, brain-feasting aliens....
Not a clue :)
Jokes without sardarji is IMPOSSIBLE!!
so....
sardarji here....
A sardar was learning english, he introduced his family..
Hi I am sardar, this is my sardarni
He is my kid and she is my kidney
A man was in an elevator, and the operator kept calling him, 'son'. So the man said, 'why do you keep calling me son? You're not my father!' And the operator replied, 'I brought you up, didn't I?LAMEEE! SO ITS a good one for this topic :P
teacher asked : Why are you late for school?
Johnny: Because of the Sign.
Teacher : What Sign?
Johnny : The sign that says "School ahead go slow"
There is this little boy and he is about to turn 10. His dad asked him what he wanted for his birthday. So his son says Dad, all I want is a ping pong ball. So his dad, puzzled, gets him a ping pong ball. He goes into the woods and comes back but he doesn't have the ping pong ball any more.
So he is about to turn 13 now. His dad asked him what he wanted for his birthday. So his son says Dad, all I want is a pack of ping pong ball. So his dad, puzzled, gets him a pack of ping pong balls. He goes into the woods and comes back but he doesn't have the ping pong balls any more.
So he is about to turn 16. His dad asked him what he wanted for his birthday. So his son says Dad, all I want is a box of ping pong balls. So his dad, puzzled, gets him a box of ping pong balls. He goes into the woods and comes back but he doesn't have the ping pong balls any more.
So he is turning 18 now. His dad asked him what he wanted for his birthday. So his son says Dad, all I want is a 5 gallon bucket of ping pong balls. So his dad, puzzled, gets him a 5 gallon bucket of ping pong balls. He goes into the woods and comes back but he doesn't have the ping pong balls any more.
Now he is turning 21. His dad asked him what he wanted for his birthday. So his son says Dad, all I want is a dump truck full of ping pong balls. So his dad, puzzled, gets him a dump truck full of ping pong balls. He goes into the woods and comes back but he doesn't have the ping pong balls any more.
A couple years later, his son gets in a terrible car accident and is hospitalized. So his dad is by his side and all, and he says to his son.....Son, I have to know one thing, WHAT in the world did you do with all those ping pong balls!??!?!?! His son looks up, and he says....Dad, I ........and then he died.
I was bored and sad :(
2 turtles got married ! they got a baby and called him FAST. Anyway the mother of FAST said to the father of FAST..do you want to go for a picnic? he said suuureeeeeeee!..Call FAST and pack some lunch and lets go !So they left home and they kept walking for 15 years untl they reached the beach.So when they reached they father of FAST said t the mother of FAST ..cook the lunch caz we are hungry..the mother of FAST said ok but then the mother of FAST remembered that she forgot to get the salt and turtled dont liek food without salt. Anyway they sad it would take too long to go home back 15 years and thn come back again anthoerh 15 years. so they decided to send FAST because he is young and lighter ,he would take in total 10 years!. Anyway so they let him go bac home and get the salt.So 5 years past..then 10 years passed , then 20 years passed , then 25 years passed then 30 yeas passed and then the mother of FAST said o boy the boy is late Sad we have to just eat without salt !! And then suddently FAST popped out from behind the bushes and said : !!! HAHAHAHA I KNO YOU WERE GONNA EAT WITHOUT MEseriously UBER LAME!
same joke but just ot revive the thread.
*
Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop'.
Customer: 'OK'.
Tech Support: 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'.
Customer: 'No'.
Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer: 'No'.
Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'.
Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' on my desktop and and I wrote 'click''.
*
Tech Support: 'OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'Start' button displayed?'
Customer: 'Wow. How can you see my screen from there?'
*
Caller: 'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realised that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?'.
*
Tech support: What kind of computer do you have? Female customer: A white one...
*
Customer: "Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out". Tech support: "Have you tried pushing the button? " Customer: "Yes, sure, it's really stuck". Tech support: "That doesn't sound good". Customer: "No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry...."
*
Tech support: "Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen". Customer: "Your left or my left? "
*
Male customer: "Hello... I can't print". Tech support: "Would you click on "Start" for me and... "Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates, dammit!"
*
Customer: "Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it..."
*
Male Customer: "I have problems printing in red..." Tech support: "Do you have a color printer?" Customer: "Aaaah.. thank you."
*
Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am? Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me ......
*
Customer: "My keyboard is not working anymore". Tech support: "Are you sure it's plugged into the back of the computer?" Customer: "Well, I can't get behind the computer". Tech support: "Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back". Customer: "OK". Tech support: "Did the keyboard come with you?" Customer: "Yes". Tech support: "Is there another keyboard?" Customer: "Yes, there's another one here. Ah... that one does work... "
*
Customer: "I can't get on the Internet". Tech support: "Are you sure you used the right password?" Customer: "Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it. He just typed five stars. "
*
Tech support: "What anti-virus program do you use?" Customer: "Netscape". Tech support: "That's not an anti-virus program". Customer: "Oh, sorry... Internet Explorer".
*
Customer: "I have a huge problem. A friend has put a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears. "
*
Customer: "I have a problem with my printer". Tech support: "Are you running it under windows?" Customer: "No, my desk is by the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine."
not sure ..took them off google blindly :P