Author Topic: can u write a good story??  (Read 6038 times)

Amelia

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #15 on: December 07, 2010, 09:05:42 am »
"What?" he asked, confused.
"There is some one outside listening to every word we say, " I whispered, "I can hear them breathing."
William's eyes widened momentarily before he composed himself. He walked round the table towards the door and opened it.
And I was right. My maid, Elinor was standing outside the open door with a goblet in her hand.

"What are you doing here?" asked William, his voice was hoarse.

"My lord," said Elinor, "You to yet to take your medicine for the night."
"Keep it on the table and begone!" said William, "Go and prepare for your and Cathy's departure tomorrow."
Elinor walked forward in the room to keep the goblet on the study table, she spared me a sympathetic glance before bowing and then left the room.

William looked shaky. Was that curiosity in his eyes? "You could hear the woman breathing, gel?" asked William bewildered.
I nodded.
"But how could you?" whispered William, "She was so many feet further away."
"I dont know, father." was my reply.
"Very Well," said William, "I suggest you go up to bed. Go, now."
I dint need telling twice.
After a while, I closed and locked my bedroom door quietly behind me. And slumped on the bed to cry myself to sleep.



 

Amelia

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #16 on: December 10, 2010, 06:19:20 pm »
"My lady, wake up", I heard Elinor's voice break into my slumber mind, "We are running late."
I opened my eyes, "Running late?"
"Yes," said Elinor, I couldn't see her clearly, yet. The curtains were still closed. "We are sailing to France, don't you remember?"
I groaned, "Eliiii, Let me go back to sleep."
She yanked me out of the bed and pushed me towards the bathtub (that was set in the room.)

"My lady," said Elinor. She pulled open the curtains. Streak of sunlight broke in lighting up the room, "May I ask you something?"
"Ask," I said, my face dripping in cold water.
"How did you know I was eavesdropping on your conversation with the duke, last night?"
"I saw you, and I heard you."
"I dont understand."
"Let it be. The matter is not of the slightest concern."
"It is of the greatest concern! How could you hear and see me behind a closed d-?" Catherine dint let her complete the sentence
"Eli," I snapped, "Arent we running late now?"
"Oh," she said, blinking, "Oh, yes. Dressing you is a tedious task."
Catherine got up and walked serenly towards the dressing table.
 
« Last Edit: January 04, 2011, 06:15:21 pm by Amelia »

Amelia

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #17 on: December 22, 2010, 07:49:43 am »
"You know what you have to do," said Catherine in a hushed voice, "Now, get a move on, old man."

"Are you sure, my lady?" frowned John.
"You have asked that a million times already", said Catherine frustrated, "Now do as I say!"
Looking wary, he proceeded to obey my command.



« Last Edit: January 04, 2011, 06:19:59 pm by Amelia »

Amelia

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #18 on: January 16, 2011, 11:59:51 pm »
One of the house maids had come up behind me, " My lady, the carriage has arrived. His Grace is awaiting your arrival outside." I turned around and walked straight past her, without replying.

It was a pleasent day. The sky was a clear cloudless blue, the landscape stretched like emarald and the birds tuned a happy song. Cool breeze ruffled my hair and gown as I walked towards the waiting carriage... and my father.

"I'll not be travelling with you," he growled, "the footman will make sure that you and Emily reach the port safely. Captain Simpson will meet you there."
Catherine nodded.
"You look beautiful," said William, his expression was cynical, "It's absurd; the colour black seems to suit you best."
"Thank you, Father." I said, tonelessly.
"Better get inside the carriage," said William, "your trunks are already loaded; and ahh.. here comes Elinor."
The footman held the carriage door open as I climbed inside. Elinor was already seated opposite me.

"Is this the final good bye, father?" I asked abruptly leaning out of the carriage window to take a last look at him.

"You can visit if your husband allows too," said William with a cynical expression. He bowed us good-bye, before the footman whipped carriage horses and they  galloped forward.




 



« Last Edit: January 18, 2011, 03:04:14 pm by Amelia »

Amelia

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #19 on: January 19, 2011, 07:48:46 pm »
It took four hours to leave the charming country side of Dorsetshire and reach London; another hour ride to reach the sea port. By the  the carriage came to a halt;the temperature had dropped considerably and the sun was about to say farewell for the day. I looked out the carriage window to see many ships of different sizes anchored at the harbour.
The footman came round to open the carriage door for us. "My lady, I'll carry your trunks to the ship. You'd better meet the Captain in the meanwhile."

"Which one is it?" I asked apprehensively. I was sore from sitting all those long hours, "The Captain and the ship, I mean."
He turned around and pointed, "The tall, dark man standing at the far end of the dock, my lady."

"Thank you," said Elinor, and then she turned to me, "Let's get a move on,"

"This is why I hate travelling," I complained, as Elinor helped me out of the carriage, "I'm so stiff, now."
Elinor simply patted my head.

"Good evening," said Captain Simpson pleasently as we approached, "You must be those charming ladies from Dorsetshire?" The man was young and tanned. He was good looking with his long black hair and straight nose.

Elinor nodded and said, "This is Lady Catherine Gaelic," (I bowed), "And I'm Elinor, her governess."

"Welcome aboard the Diamente , my ladies." said Simpson pointing to the large ship achored to our left,. The ship was humongous, painted white and beautiful," If you follow me, I'll take you to your cabin." 

Amelia

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #20 on: February 03, 2011, 03:05:33 pm »
I have the most elegant cabin in the ship, or so the captain had said. Elinor was residing in the cabin next to mine. Having no interest whatsoever in our sojourn, I changed for the evening.

I was pinning up my long hair into an elegant coffiure, when the cabin door opened and Elinor came in talking. "Are you ready, dar -?" she stopped at midsentence when her eyes fell on me.

"My lady," said Elinor, "You look fetching."

I raised my eyebrow, and gave her a crooked smile, "Dont I always?"

She blinked, "Yes, child." smiled Elinor, "But today you look more like a woman then a girl in that evening gown of yours."

True, I thought as I looked once more in the mirror. Never before this had I dressed to be alluring and formal at the same time. Slender sphagetti straps uphold the fitted bodice of this gorgeous gown with the skirt flowing to the ground. I was wearing my mother's diamonds, and my coiffure was the best a woman can have.

"When are we setting sail, Eli?" I asked matter of factly.

"Soon after dinner." she said. "Which reminds me why I'm here in the first place. Dinner's to take place in the Captain's cabin. He has invited us to join him. Like we knew he would."

Sighing, I opened the small box on my dressing table and retrieved a folded piece of parchment.

"What is that?" Eli asked curiously.
"A letter for you," I said tonelessly, "But I want you to promise me that you will only open it after midnight." Preplexed she took the parchment, from my hand but asked no further question.
 
Simpson's cabin was a little larger then the one she was given but it was more elgeant. The smell of roast turkey had my stomach growling but overall it was a very sordid affair. The Captain wasn't as pleasent as I thought he was. With his bunch of questions and a sneer across his face.

"So, my lady," he said, turning around to look across the dining table at me, "Why, may I ask, have you decided to leave Britain?"
No, "To Marry, Captain." I said, contradicting my thoughts.

"Marry?" ventured Simpson, taking a sip of his brandy, "But you arent out of the school room, are you?" He spared a fleeting glance at Elinor.

I stiffened, surely a dinner conversation didnt revolve around a ladies personal life, "I am, indeed, out of the school room. Elinor is not only my governess, she's a good friend as well."

"I see..."  


« Last Edit: July 31, 2011, 08:51:37 pm by Amelia »

Offline iluvme

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #21 on: February 04, 2011, 06:30:45 pm »
Waiting......
I believe in killing the messenger. Know why? It sends  message.
~Damon Salvatore~

Offline Locke Lamora

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #22 on: May 22, 2011, 12:10:16 am »
hmmm... Amelia, will you continue?

And an itsy bitsy critique; the change in perspective from 1st person to 3rd person is a bit disorienting....

Offline Tohru Kyo Sohma

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #23 on: May 22, 2011, 12:35:18 am »
wow....amelia.....u are the awesomest(i noe that's wrong :P)...writer ever.........u write soo good!!!keep on the good work!!
+rep ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Offline Tohru Kyo Sohma

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #24 on: May 22, 2011, 12:53:45 am »
i want the story to continue :( :'(

Amelia

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #25 on: May 22, 2011, 03:44:51 pm »
Waiting......

Your patience is great.  ;D Sorry, girl, I forgot this thread even existed.  :-[

hmmm... Amelia, will you continue?

And an itsy bitsy critique; the change in perspective from 1st person to 3rd person is a bit disorienting....

I'll continue, if you guys want me too.  ::) And, ahem... I'll try to make it a bit more "orienting" :P

wow....amelia.....u are the awesomest(i noe that's wrong :P)...writer ever.........u write soo good!!!keep on the good work!!
+rep ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

You flatter me,girl  :D
There are better writer's, ofcourse (even in SF). It's just that I'm the only one writing. Thank you, nonetheless.  ;)


i want the story to continue :( :'(

It'll continue, then. But you have to wait.. atleast, till the end of this month.  ::) :P

Offline Tohru Kyo Sohma

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #26 on: May 22, 2011, 05:29:57 pm »
okie!!!!i can wait.....i read alot of books and u are a really good one(writer ...that is... ;D)
 :D :D :D :D :D

Offline Locke Lamora

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Re: can u write a good story??
« Reply #27 on: May 22, 2011, 05:53:22 pm »
I'll continue, if you guys want me too.  ::) And, ahem... I'll try to make it a bit more "orienting" :P



Cool. Of course, continue or start a new story....
And I don't care about your "orientation", just the story's... :P :P


till the end of May? Acceptable.....